Obama's Middle East Moves Have Observers Baffled, IRS Won't Take Your Calls, Sen. Menendez Faces Corruption Charges: P.M. Links


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  1. Sen. Robert Menendez (D-NJ) was indicted for corruption and for being a general tool.

    Hell hath no fury like a Messiah scorned.

    1. Hello.

      Everyone’s losing their fricken minds.


      They even demanded Coach K weigh in on Indiana.

      I really can’t follow their line of thinking anymore. Since when do we demand everyone give an opinion on every lousy political issue.

      God dammit they’re retarded.

      1. It does seem like the moral outrage is climbing to new levels. Maybe the internet exacerbates it?

        1. Distraction is required.

          1. Distraction is required.

            I think you’re onto something. It’s not surprising that the JournoList is desperate to focus attention on anything except their hero’s myriad failures, from the dismal economy, to the ludicrous “negotiations” with Iran, Bowe Berghdal, the exploding regional war in the Middle East, the trillions of dollars in debt, the shitty health care law, etc. etc. etc.

            1. And Hillary’s email server and personal spy team.

        2. Victimization and outrage are the rallying calls of progressives everywhere. If there aren’t any victims to be found, simply create one and get on with the outrage.

          1. The truth is, they do have listeners in the Democrat party in the USA and Liberal/NDP in Canada. Their invective stupidity finds its way to the top.

            They’re upset Coach K tried to wisely avoid it. They demand we all take part in their sick play.

            Think of it. An ESPN writer is demanding Indiana change its laws. Who the fuck is she to take this role?

            1. I suspect a lot of this kicked off when Charles Pierce wrote about it on his Grantland article. The second I saw that, I knew an epic media shitstorm was in the brewing, because as much of a ridiculously pathetic nerd as Pierce is, he does belong to the media elite that set the narrative.

      2. “Since when do we demand everyone give an opinion on every lousy political issue.”

        Fascists have always been that way. Everyone must fall in line, or else.

  2. …its employees aren’t answering most calls.

    They have Caller ID.

  3. You know what President Obama is up to in the Middle East?

    FACING MECCA PROBABLY. Or fucking things up.

    1. That would imply a heretofore unknown level of competence and understanding… far more likely he’s facing Medina by accident

      1. “Hey, infidel, you’re bowing in the wrong direction!”

        “I’m just trying to let out a fart.”

  4. Gov. Asa Hutchinson of Arkansas wants state lawmakers to back off the bill they just passed.

    You Know which other Republicans backed off something they just passed?

    1. All of them in the senate bathroom.

      1. Psh. Like ANY politician accepts that his or her own shit stinks.

  5. Transformational foreign policy? From Obama? In the Middle East?

    That’s some pretty strong KoolAid, Politico.

    1. “Transformational” in this case means from bad to worse. So, yes, transformational.

  6. Iraq’s victory lap over defeating ISIS in Tikrit may be a tad premature, U.S. officials say.

    You know who else celebrated a victory a tad premature?

    1. George W. Bush?

    2. Kaeli Clay?


    3. Palpatine?

    4. Oberyn Martell?

      1. Too soon, man.

        1. Of all the awful things to see in that show, that was the most awful.

          1. Red Wedding is more of a nutpunch, even if you know it’s coming.

            But as pure spectacle, that was utterly gruesome.

        2. Is 15 years really too soon?

      2. Spoiler Alert!

    5. King Priam?

    6. Mark Sloan?

    7. The hare from that race?

    8. Al Gore?

    9. Hitler, when he bought that Terrell Owens jersey for the Super Bowl.

      1. You know who else made a bad call on the Super Bowl?

        1. John Fox?

        2. You know who else recursed?

    10. Barack Obama?

  7. I was at the IRS office the other day trying to resolve a mistake made my my state department of revenue, and noticed there was a sign that said “no tax advice given at this office.” There wasn’t much of a line.

    1. I hate having to call a state or the IRS.

      The weenies answering the phones have no idea what’s going on.

      What happens a lot of time is I call, get someone, and they tell me I have the wrong department (I don’t) so they are going to transfer me. I end up back at the main menu.

      1. I called last year when my previous employer didn’t send a W-2. After a brief moment in automated land, I was transferred to a human.

        “Hello, thank you for calling Domino’s.”
        “…. wot?”
        “I’m sorry-”

        The only way they could have improved my experience was to sentence previous employer to fifty lashes. Weird.

    2. The problem I had was that the state sent me a notice that I owed money. It took three long calls to find out they had a problem with our claiming a dependent in 2011, and supposedly the IRS notified them of the problem, and that we were being audited by the IRS. So, I took time off work to go to the IRS office. The woman there was pretty nice, she gave me paperwork showing that I was not being audited and that my 2011 return had been accepted as-is. After that I called the state again, and within 5 minutes the person I talked to found that there was some typo in the report the IRS sent, and she fixed the problem while I was on the phone. Hours of my time wasted, and all I got was a sheepish, “sorry!”

      BTW, I’d assume this is what government-controlled health care will look like. Your time is not worth anything to these people.

  8. In related news, the latest nuke talks with Iran aren’t going so well.

    Obama’s legacy

    1. I wonder what his legacy is going to be. I mean, to his acolytes, not to sane people. Will his Presidential Library have a shrine to pray towards?

      1. Well, to hear it from his supporters he personally slew Osama bin Laden in single-combat. Also, BOOOOSSSSSHHHHHHHHH!

      2. Whatever they can get away with. I’m guessing some civil rights nonsense.

    2. Leading from behind!

  9. For 7 percent of Americans, Internet access means a smartphone and only a smartphone.

    Or, as I call it, the tiny internet.

  10. Another day, another dozen articles about the same thing with 300+ articles.


  11. …Gov. Asa Hutchinson of Arkansas wants state lawmakers to back off the bill they just passed.

    Any other ill-considered legislation slated for introspection?

    1. Is the Bill of Rights legislation?

  12. For 7 percent of Americans, Internet access means a smartphone and only a smartphone.

    I don’t think this segment is reading Reason.

    1. I don’t think this segment is reading Reason

      So most of the internet then?

  13. Elizabeth Stoker Breunig explains feminism.

    Enjoy. It includes a hilarious claim that it’s okay for liberal feminists to hate Ayaan Hirsi Ali because she’s a ‘militant atheist.’

    Then there’s this:

    “By criticizing women intellectuals and politicians whose ideas are opposed to feminist politics, we’re showing them respect: We’re taking them seriously enough to reject them.”

    You see, when they called Sarah Palin a cunt it was really just an attempt to show her respect through their rejection.

    1. “There were actual politics at stake, and it would’ve been an ridiculously dangerous move to substitute identity affinities for political analysis.”

      Oh. Oh, Jesus. Stop it. Stop it, my sides. The laughter is…too much…to bear.

    2. Lowry’s imagination omits the idea that someone can be correct about the problem (namely: the abuse of women and girls under brutal religious regimes) and wrong about the solution (that is, militant atheism).

      I’m pretty sure ESB is the only feminist who thinks atheism is her problem.

      1. movement feminism is about systematic gains for women?that is, using politics to change structures that make women less free than men. This could mean a variety of things: legally requiring paid maternity leave so that when women have children they don’t stumble into poverty; enacting laws that prevent employers from discriminating against pregnant workers; or creating robust welfare programs that will lift women, who are disproportionately poor, out of poverty

        Tell that to the little African girl whose vagina has been sliced up by the village chieftain.

      2. If Ali had become an evangelical Protestant, the feminists wouldn’t have minded/


    3. I was just thinking we hadn’t heard any of her special brand of derp lately. Now I’m thinking I really could have done without it. Kind of like “hey, I haven’t had Taco Bell in a while…”

    4. By criticizing women intellectuals and politicians whose ideas are opposed to feminist politics, we’re showing them respect: We’re taking them seriously enough to reject them

      So ESB actually respects everyone she criticizes? I find that a little hard to believe.

  14. More bad news for the religion of global warming – aerosols aren’t as big a contributor as previously thought, so their effect on warming is smaller, so the warming is not underestimated by observations.

    These findings suggest that aerosol radiative forcing is less negative and more certain than is commonly believed.

    1. “This clearly means that carbon dioxide is an even more powerful forcing agent than previously believed.”


    2. Leading to this.

      Compared with using the AR5 aerosol forcing estimates, the preferred ECS best estimate using an 1859?1882 base period reduces by 0.2?C to 1.45?C, with the TCR best estimate falling by 0.1?C to 1.21?C. More importantly, the upper 83% ECS bound comes down to 1.8?C and the 95% bound reduces dramatically ? from 4.05?C to 2.2?C, below the ECS of all CMIP5 climate models except GISS-E2-R and inmcm4.

  15. Is this ET? Mystery of strange radio bursts from space

    I know something about this topic, so I’m definitely NOT going with ET. If the relationship is real, I’m heavily betting on man-made signals.

    1. Terrestrial radio signals bouncing off of space debris?

      1. It would need to be a frequency swept signal, and to have a very specific form. I think there is still a good chance they are cosmological in origin and that the relationship specified in the article is spurious. But it is definitely weird.

      2. Nope. Classified shit.

    2. TARS has been found.

  16. We need another 1000 “You’re a Hypocrite!” “no U!” articles

  17. You know what President Obama is up to in the Middle East?

    Desperately lunging after a “legacy” accomplishment, any legacy accomplishment?

    “I need a legacy. This would be a legacy. Therefore, we must do this.”

    1. The Middle East is like crack for politicians. Gotta get me some legacy, solving their problems.

      1. First preference is and Israeli-Muslim deal, second preference is “liberating” a country. Third and last is fucking all of our past allies, assisting power vacuums to develop and attempting rapprochement with a country who think of us as “The Great Satan”. Seems legit.

        1. I’d tell Europe that we’re pulling out and they can handle it (or not) going forward. Give them a year for the transition, because we’re all friends and stuff. We can stay friendly in the trade sense with the countries we still deal with over there, especially Israel, but no more military shenanigans. And we lost our role as neutral arbiter long ago, so we can stay the heck out of the diplomatic side, too.

      2. Could be worse. Could be a ground war in Asia.

        1. Well, technically…

          1. NO BOOTS ON THE GROUND!

            1. The new combat boo.. I mean footwear is a lot more like high topped running shoes.

              1. Air Pattons?

    2. You know what a real legacy would be? To be the POTUS to tell the whole region to go fuck themselves.

      Oh and to then reduce our deficit by selling countries in the ME all the fucking military surplus stuff that we are giving to our local cops.

      1. So many problems solved all at once.

        1. It’s like the “Escape from New York” solution except for an entire region. Although innocent people live there too. It’s immoral, but a legacy for sure.

          1. If they were innocent, Waffles, they wouldn’t be living in the ME.

      2. We got a lot of military surplus, but we ain’t got that much military surplus.

        1. As long as it is over there in the ME and not here, I’m good.

          I didn’t say it would pay off the entire deficit, just that it would help to get back some of the pennies on the dollars we wasted on that shit in the first place.

      3. So where do you want me to send the “Vote for Jimbo” campaign donation?

    3. He already has a legacy.


  18. For 7 percent of Americans, Internet access means a smartphone and only a smartphone. Guess I should start writing bigger, huh?

    And ESPN decided to redesign their website to cater to them alone.

    Not like they’re unique in that regard.

    1. When I’m surfing the web on my tablet, I regularly opt for the “full site.” Mobile-dedicated sites offend me, because they usually suck.

      1. I wrote a strongly worded letter conveying that exact sentiment. I also told them to enjoy the ~$500 I paid to them for assorted subscriptions over the last 15 years because they’re now dead to me.

      2. Don’t use Reason’s. It’ll make you break your phone.

        1. It used to be terrible but I can’t say I’ve really had any issues with it since their little overhaul a while back. I wouldn’t say it’s great, but it’s at least competently functional.

          1. That reminds me. I just noticed a bug that I need to email them about.

        2. It’s better than the old one, which was literally unusable. The only thing with the new one is its entirely too sensitive to “side swiping” and throws me to another article while I’m scrolling through comments.

          1. Yes, I’ve noticed that too. Dislike.

          2. +1

    2. Personally, I’m a fan of Sports Illustrated’s business model: make sure that every page is showing at least one picture of Kate Upton in a bikini at all times.

  19. So when will the Colts and Pacers get expelled from the NFL and NBA?

  20. Detroit Pistons and Cleveland Indians used to play in Indiana, they should be expelled too.

    1. Cleveland… Indians?

      *narrows gaze*

      1. Nowhere near as racist as the Milwaukee Bucks.

        1. The most racist name in sports are the Toronto Maple Leafs and Detroit Red Wings.

          Not sure how but they are.

          1. Pfft… Rochester Americans.

            *drops mic*

  21. “With the tax deadline looming, don’t bother calling the IRS for advice?its employees aren’t answering most calls.”

    Just tell them that you have a new list of conservative groups applying for non-profit status that need to have their applications deep sixed.

    You will get through in flash.

  22. Fun fact: lower ranking Iranian clerics wear white turbans and higher ups wear black turbans.
    I don’t know whether they have stars on their bellies.

    1. Is it just me or is that story a bit, I don’t know, racist?

      The Plain-Bellied Sneetches just stared and frowned when the Star-Bellied Sneetches played ball or had frankfurter roasts. Did it occur not occur to a Plain-Bellied Sneetch to say “Fuck you!” to the Star-Bellied Sneetches and start their own a ball games frankfurter roasts? It’s almost as if Dr Seuss thought the Plain-Bellied Sneetches were too stupid to come up with ideas and had to depend on the Star Bellied Sneetches to function.

      Which is kind of what actual racists believe about blacks?

  23. I’ve been thinking. Despite the outcry about Indiana’s RFRA being almost entirely devoid of any connection between the law and the practices everyone wants to reverse-secede Indiana for, the idea behind the RFRA–restoring a fundamental right that the Supreme Court unilaterally demoted because drugs are bad, m’kay?–is one I can get behind. But I want something stronger than a law. An amendment. Restoring all constitutionally protected rights and recognizing that the negative liberties not listed there still exist and should receive all of the protections of law.

    1. Yeah. We should definitely try to have an amendment passed. In fact, I think this would be good language for it:

      “The enumeration in the Constitution of certain rights shall not be construed to deny or disparage others retained by the people”

      Think that would work?

      1. Didn’t work the first time. But maybe if we added, “But we really mean it” it would work?

        I think it would be instructive to push hard on a general restoration of civil liberties amendment (again, just for negative liberties), just to watch people fight against it.

        1. Put some teeth in it. Here one good place for mandatory minimums: mandatory $10,000 fine for the first attempt to enact legislation that is outside of the scope of enumerated powers; mandatory death penalty for the next try.

          1. “Show us in the Constitution where you can do that. *Seriously*, show us.”

            1. “Sure, look over the edgeof that cliff, the Constitution is at the bottom. Bend over and read it…more…more…you won’t be able to read it unless you lean forward more than that…”

            2. “Listen here, you silly fucks! We got tar, and we got feathers, so…”

      2. Or how about

        The powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the states, are reserved to the states respectively, or to the people.

        It is just so crazy it might work.

      3. I came up with Amendment 0.5 today:

        The right of the people to act like assholes shall not be infringed.

    2. Yes. The Supreme Court doesn’t get the final say on everything. Just because those assholes think the Constitution means anything, doesn’t mean that the rest of us can’t think and hold the government to a different standard. We should stop being so dependent on them to protect our rights.

      1. The current system isn’t amenable to that. The only recourse we have when federal government goes out of control is revolution. They neutered the states, which were the other check on federal power.

        I think that some of the federal lands out west should be designated as liberty preserves. People can then vote with their feet, and move to the liberty preserves, where the FedGov has no jurisdiction. of course, then all they need is a fence and a few nukes and they kill off all the wreckers and kulaks, but a man can dream.

        1. Which is why we need. . .THE CENSOR!

        2. “Coventry” by RAH in the Future History series predicts this.

        3. You hit on my personal theory on why the US was so good for so long. Because we had tons of land where people could escape to.

          In 1890 the US frontier was officially declared closed. Ten years later people were stuck with assholes like Teddy Roosevelt. No where to move to in order to escape. Been downhill since then.

          Think of the hurt bag the US would be in if sea steading became viable. How long would it take for the progs to nationalize everything if people had somewhere else to go?

          1. I subscribe to the same theory. Government, while being coercive, was still escapable to some extent. The Civil War did much of the damage, but the end of the frontier killed the patient.

            1. Time to go to the Moon and buy some land. Maybe I’ll raise alpacas.

  24. Today in “my prog friends”:

    I posted, in the April 1st spirit, “Warren/Sanders ’16!”

    I got a response saying, while they knew I was joking, that they would definitely vote for that ticket.

    1. Warren/Sanders.

      Stick ’em up!

    2. Sadly, the Colonel is no more.

    3. Given the gross expansion of executive power as of late, I would seriously consider 2nd amendment remedies if that were the case.

    4. Bernie Sanders adopts plank 12 of the Nazi Party Platform.

  25. Stop calling people ‘tax payers’ because it makes poor people sad.

    There are countless examples of this reading of “taxpayer” bleeding out of official rheotric and into mainstream political commentary. Consider Megan McArdle’s recent meditation on prison reform in Bloomberg View, in which she points out that “prison is ? very expensive,” and therefore, “while we’re punishing the criminal, we’re also heavily punishing the taxpayer.” Imagining tax payment as a kind of punishment is the upshot to the general use of the term, however innocuously the majority of its speakers may intend it. If money owed in taxes is imagined, as in the budget plan and McArdle’s usage, to belong to the taxpayer, then programs operating off of public revenue do seem to have some obligation to correspond to their funders’ consent, and serving the interests of others does seem unfair. But these are all obfuscations brought on by the term.


    2. If money owed in taxes is imagined, as in the budget plan and McArdle’s usage, to belong to the taxpayer

      IF? IF? FUCK YOU!!!!

      1. You didn’t build earn that.

        1. The same laws that determine that money deposited into a person’s bank account belongs to that person also determine that taxes owed on that deposit do not. Public revenue is just that: a pool of public money to be used for the good of the public, not 300 million pools of private money each to be used to serve private individuals’ interests.

          It’s not that you didn’t earn it, it is that you earned it for society. It’s right there in the social contract.

          1. Property is granted to you by law. Owning property is not a natural behavior of humans, it’s an artifact of societal organization. I guess that’s how it goes. Something tells me ESB has never tried to take food away from a hungry dog. She might have a different view on how natural property is if she had.

            1. Shut your mouth! ESB would never take anything from anyone.

              Only a cruel bastard would try to steal sustenance from the mouth of a cute dog. How can you live with yourself?

              OK, maybe she would take the hatred from your heart if she only had the ability.

      2. My favorite part of ESB – if you agree with her but do so for the wrong reasons, you’re still the enemy.

        So McCardle agrees with ESB on prison reform, but because McCardle dares to mention filthy capitalist lucre as one of the reasons reform is needed, McCardle is still an Other and worthy of disdain.

        1. My favorite part is that she’s TWENTY FOUR YEARS OLD. I wonder if she’ll have the sense to be ashamed of herself in 20 years for writing this garbage.

          1. In 20 years she will be running the state ministry of history and will be able to expunge shit like this. Sort of like the Soviets airbrushing Trotsky out of existence.

          2. I think by 24 you should know better. The real world should’ve set in by them. If not, you’ve chosen to live and work in magic liberal fairy land.

            1. Not when you’re in perpetual childhood as facilitated by the government.

    3. Seriously, maybe we should just got back to the patron-client model. I’d rather see my tax dollars go to people who are my direct clients than to random poor people or crony businesses.

    4. This is enough to make a man want to “other” the non-taxpayer into non-voter status.

    5. If money owed in taxes is imagined, as in the budget plan and McArdle’s usage, to belong to the taxpayer, then programs operating off of public revenue do seem to have some obligation to correspond to their funders’ consent


      1. If money owed in taxes cotton picked from a plantation is imagined, as in the budget plan and McArdle’s usage, to belong to the taxpayer slave , then programs operating off of public revenue proceeds from the cotton’s sale do seem to have some obligation to correspond to their funders’ the slaves’ consent

    6. The House budget is full of examples of seemingly straightforward deployments of the term which are, upon closer inspection, clearly furthering a particular ideology. “There are too many scenarios these days in which Washington forgets that its power is derived from the ‘consent of the governed,'” the plan reads in one instance of the term’s use. “It forgets that its financial resources come from hard-working American taxpayers who wake up every day, go to work, actively grow our economy and create real opportunity.” In other words, Americans’ taxes are parallel with taxpayers’ consent, suggesting that expenditures that do not correspond to an individual’s will are some kind of affront.

      Impressive. She wrote over a thousand words for a strawman she invented out of thin air.

      Not once does she quote anyone saying or suggesting or implying that a “taxpayer” is supposed to get a direct benefit from every govt program. Every quote she mentions says the opposite (and agree with what she’s saying): that the govt produces these public goods that benefit all or benefit society. She even quotes the *GOP* budget when it praises food stamps and public housing!

      She simply invented this other argument and banged out 1000 words refuting it. What a waste.

  26. “You know what President Obama is up to in the Middle East?”


    He’s so vain he probably thinks the Constitution was about him.

    1. He’s so vain, he thinks the Carly Simon song is about him.

  27. If you aren’t free to be an asshole, you aren’t free.

    Atheists should also have the right to be assholes. That’s my only problem with Indiana’s law.

    1. Even more than that, Christians have a right to be assholes for non-religious reasons too.

    2. If Indiana had a public accommodation law protecting gays, this would be something to argue about. But it doesn’t. SERVICE DENIED.

    3. Brought that up in an argument with some buddies earlier. As a non-believer I’m getting screwed in this deal because I don’t have an imaginary friend to backstop my beliefs.

      For instance, if I had a moral problem with abortion, could I get out of shit like selling day after pills if I was an atheist? I think it is very easy to see how a logical non believer, you could reach the conclusion that abortion is morally wrong. So why does Joe Catholic guy get out of jail free just because he has an imaginary friend in the sky, but the atheist if fucked?

      Or is the atheist not fucked and I just don’t know enough about the law?

      1. On a tangent, abortion will be next. If the progs parlay this mob into legislative action and get the federal RFRA repealed, Hobby Lobby will be the target.

        No matter what side of the issue you’re on, the idea of people being forced to do or promote something they think is murder is . . . well, it makes most dystopia literature look tame.

        1. It also is going to make some people think “if the only way to avoid murdering innocents is to murder baby-killers… I think I’m probably okay with that”.

          I mean, if you’re fucked whether you bomb a clinic or just decline to help fund one, then you might as well get the most bang for your fuck, so to speak.

      2. Freedom of conscience, freedom of speech, freedom of association. Every one of those is as important as the free exercise of religion. Forcing someone to do business with you, it seems to me, is a positive liberty and not as important in the grand scheme as the negative liberties affected here.

        1. Free exercise of religion is really just a specific case of those three.

          1. I actually agree with that.

      3. How about “I’m an abortion pill salesman, but I won’t sell em to fish-eaters, cause fuck them catholic fucks, their boss said they weren’t allowed!”

        Does that meet proper moral outrage?

        1. Congratulations, you’ve become Woodrow Wilson

    4. “Atheists should also have the right to be assholes. That’s my only problem with Indiana’s law.”

      But atheism is a religion!

      Seriously, various *types* of atheism are religious, or could easily be framed as religious.

    5. See Amendment 0.5 supra, which would enshrine this in holiest law.

  28. Fun idea for an April Fools Day prank: come up with a fake press release from a made-up Congressman, make it a noxious opinion about RFRA, and see how many news outlets run with it.

    1. And you can’t use Rand Paul. That’d be too easy.

    2. Girls have the upper hand on this day, since they can just call up a guy they recently slept with and feign pregnancy.

      1. Like you’ve never asked your girlfriend, “Wait, wasn’t your period supposed to be last week?” just to see that frantic internal-math face.

      2. 2 years ago today I got a text frommy now wife:
        “I’m pregnant. ”
        Followed immediately by:
        “Not April Fools”

        It was not a prank. I have the 1 year old to probe it.

        1. Training the sprog for government work early, eh?

        2. I’m calling Child Services. 1 year olds should not be given probes. It is too dangerous.

          1. We’re all about experiential learning in my house. “That’s why you don’t touch the metal part of the probe when it comes out of the oven.”

        3. Ooooh. Shotgun wedding!!!1

  29. I’ve had enough of unpleasant things like ESB articles. I’m going to watch Foghorn Leghorn shoot an 1863 Springfield.

  30. Not ONE April Fools link? NOTHING???

    I am so not even i dont know what

    At the very least i was hoping for something about how the Koch brothers were selling Reason to Soros in exchange for…. uh, the balkans or something.

      1. Even the images are reversed. Brilliant.

        1. What is kind of neat is that the images themselves are not reversed (right click and view the images in isolation if you want to prove it to yourself). They are actually using CSS to flip everything on-the-fly.

    1. You can console yourself by planting a Cheeto in pot. In a few weeks, you’ll have a blossoming Cheeto Bush.


    2. I suspect this is an April Fool, but I didn’t watch it to make sure.


    3. Thinkgeek had a great game for sale.

    4. Uber to the rescue.

  31. I am going to destroy Warty’s sanity if it’s the last thing I do.

    It’s an ESB article in Jacobin about the Rolling Stones rape article.

    It’s like God came down from heaven and bestowed upon me his bounty.

    Spoiler Alert! She calls Jackie a ‘victim’ and says people ‘digging into her life’ are reactionaries.

    1. Nope. I’m gonna listen to Agalloch and remain blissful. Not gonna do it. You can’t make me do it.

    2. Have you read her story about how she was worried her mom would see her differently after she got married? That’s one of my faves.

      1. Holy God, I love you so much right now despite the fact that you’re the worst.


        “The phenomenon the myth accounts for is not an insubstantial one, especially for an ancient agrarian culture. That the shift of seasons could be feasibly chalked up to the competition between mother and husband gives some sense of the emotional gravitas of the situation. Most tellings, rendered flatly, depict Hades as a pretty sorry character, but imagine Persephone’s perspective: with her mother, she’s ever the flower-crowned lap-perched darling, cute, you might say, but not alluring. With Hades she’s a queen crowned on her own throne, reigning over shade and shadow with the dark red glimmer of pomegranate seeds close at hand.”


        1. between mother and husband

          Please please please tell me this is some feminist derp where the mother is given all the credit for having a child, and the father is demoted to husband in order to rub it in.

          1. Rubbing it in is he father’s only role.

            1. *Paging Swiss, Swiss to the PM links please*

          2. Please please please tell me this is some feminist derp where the mother is given all the credit for having a child,

            *nose raise and sniff* If you weren’t so unlettered, you’d realize it was a reference to the rivalry between the Demeter (the mother of Persephone) and Hades (her husband). Now, be off with you, Sirrah! You reek of the scullery maid.
            *returns to tea*

    3. Irish, I’m worried about you. I think we need to have some ESB intervention for you. It isn’t healthy to spend so much time reading her claptrap.

      I guess we should have been more vigilant when you were experimenting with Marcotte. I didn’t realize that she was a gateway derp and you would soon be mainlining the hard stuff.

      1. At least ESB has seriously intellectual citations:

        “It is fair to imagine that abstract analysis of enormous political and social structures is a bit dry for the average reader, but gripping narratives can be produced in a variety of ways other than memoir: Michael Perelman’s The Invention of Capitalism and Naomi Klein’s The Shock Doctrine both come to mind as examples of viscerally engaging literature without a personal bent.”

        She thinks Naomi Klein’s crazed lunacy in The Shock Doctrine doesn’t have a personal bent.

        1. Dude you are just trying to rationalize your problem away.

          Just admit that you have a disease and you have no power over it.


      “liberal” media outlets

      Oppression can be carried out through silencing ? the systematic suppression of the experience of marginalized groups.

      Michael Perelman’s The Invention of Capitalism and Naomi Klein’s The Shock Doctrine both come to mind as examples of viscerally engaging literature without a personal bent.

      It’s a good thing she’s so cute, isn’t it?

    5. ” the Rolling Stones rape ….”


      1. +1

        Best laugh of the day

    6. “Self-styled reactionary cyber Sherlocks have already begun digging up and sharing personal details about her and her family. Placing the weight of entire arguments on the shoulders of specific people, especially those who have survived trauma, thus seems unfair both to them and the success of the arguments.”

      Translated: Don’t put us in a position of having to discuss truth or falsity. Individual stories are just too damn specific. These “facts” can get us all hung up.

      1. almost everything she’s saying is just a fancy way of restating =

        “our leftist propaganda needs to be unfalsifiable”

        or “truth is a weakness”

        the layers of pretentious intellectualism is just so much sugar on the pill.

    7. “The Left is not strictly interested in procedural justice ? our purview extends to outcomes…”

      And we know what outcomes we want, justice be damned.

    8. “Leftist analysis is at its best when it focuses on systematic critiques. Erdely’s piece was arguably engaged in just such a project, though the undoing of its anecdotal obsession has undermined that thrust…..The goal of Erdely’s piece, before it was undermined by the dissolution of her anecdote, was to identify and demand accountability from institutions that foster rape, to protest immunity for privileged rapists, and ultimately to end campus rape”

      I lol’d

      apparently its intellectually honest to ascribe “noble intent” to a writer who knowingly passed up on *actually documented cases of rape* in order to highlight a sensational tale which she likely knew to be false at the outset…. to what? “improve society”? really?

      or was it to advance her personal career, sell magazines, gain esteem in the eyes of her lefty peers for enlarging their manufactured narrative…?

      i love it

      I’ve never actually read any of ESB pieces from beginning to end before…. but really? she’s a pretty miserable writer. it reads like so much college sophomore intellectualism… saying extremely simple things in most tortured, jargon-laden ways.

      1. And yet she thinks she can go toe-to-toe with McArdle, somehow.

        1. She has god on her side.

      2. She says extremely simple things in most tortured ways because she is disguising utter bullshit as truth and mendacity as thoughtfulness.

        The left is, as far as I can tell, populated entirely with bald-faced liars.

  32. Some Progs talking about Patton Oswalt’s reaction to those Trevor Noah tweets:

    Is there anything more obnoxious than the whole “comedians should be allowed to say whatever they want without repercussions as long as it’s in joke form!” schtick? It’s so unbelievable. How can they actually think they’re that entitled because they are occasionally funny?

    I am so done with comedians and their bullshit about ‘free speech’ and their constant complaining about PC-ness and SJWs. That sort of thing is soo transparent and just shows their ass on how conservative they really are. Like, how willfully obtuse can you be? I swear the only reasonable comedians I’ll be left with are Hari Kondabolu and Bo Burnham lmao.

    One day it will be possible to question the validity and incommensurate impact of some cases of social media outrage without sanctimoniously whining about the PC police stealing our delicate little free speech.

    But today is not that day.

    1. Yeah, because Bo Burnham is so PC.

      1. I’ve heard of neither of those people.

        1. I’m not familiar with the first one. Burnham is pretty funny, although I like his first show better than his second, in which he gives off a bit of an arrogant vibe.

          Granted, Burnham doesn’t take it nearly to the level of Oswalt or this Noah guy. More importantly, though, he probably gets away with it in this person’s mind because he often makes little “IT’S FUNNY ‘CAUSE IT’S SEXIST/RACIST”-esque quips after jokes. Progs, being mental midgets, don’t realize that the disclaimer is implied in other acts.

    2. It’s great to see them devour each other.

  33. OT: The Chicago Mayoral runoff election is in a week or so and the canvassers for Rahm Emmanuel and Chuy Garcia are out in full force. Anyway, I got into a facebook discussion (stupid on my part) about Chuy being a nice guy but not agreeing with his policy positions. A Chuy supporter went off the fucking deep end and called me shrill for the Rahm campaign and being in the pocket of the rich. I then said that I’m not voting for Rahm either and hate what he has done to the city. The guy didn’t get a clue and called me a whore for the capitalists and a lover of Rahm even though not one time, I claimed that I wanted Rahm to win. I was like, ” I’m done.”

    1. As a rule (that I admit I broke a few times) I avoid stating anything political on Derpbook. One reason is because there is always that one friend of your friend that is completely unhinged

      1. Chuy Garcia’s supporters are unhinged as fuck. He’s a nice guy but they are trying to create this cult like aura around him like he will be the savior of the city. I don’t he’s even remotely corrupt, i think he’s just incompetent and don’t have the balls to make the tough choices and do what needs to be done.

        1. Your first mistake was saying Garcia is a nice guy. Such deprbook wimpery makes you a target.

    2. “a whore for the capitalists “

      I think when people start dropping that kind of science, you should give them as much room to run as they need. or, egg them on. It might get even more colorful.

      Also = hey, who put these @#*(&@ “Clear/ Reset” buttons near the comment box? like we don’t have enough problems with the squirrels, now we’ve got little ‘self-destruct’ buttons planted everywhere.

      1. I run with that shit all the time. I even refer to myself as sucking the big cock of capitalism. It’s fun to see how unhinged they become when I say that comment.

      2. “who put these @#*(&@ “Clear/ Reset” buttons near the comment box? “

        Lest people think i’m delusional…. its apparently a new feature of the “greasonable” thing

        1. Its about time you noticed.. They seem to be out of the way to me, would you like a option to disable them? Just the clear/disable buttons? I personally find them useful.
          Note, you can select (just about) any text on the page and click the tag buttons and it will add the text to your comment with that tag around it.

        2. Ok.. added option to disable the clear/reset buttons.. Though, note that I find them useful, so I made the default option to be on. You can turn them off in the misc section of the filters dialog box.

  34. You know what President Obama is up to in the Middle East?

    The equivalent of voting “Present”?

  35. the latest nuke talks with Iran aren’t going so well

    Banning nukes will be as effective as Prohibition.

    I’m sure the end result is that Obama will sell nukes to Iran at a discount because he’s scared they might become self-sufficient.

  36. For 7 percent of Americans, Internet access means a smartphone and only a smartphone. Guess I should start writing bigger, huh?
    Nah, they’re all on Facebook and Youtube.

  37. Lest people think i’m delusional…. its apparently a new feature of the “greasonable” thing

    is this better than Reasonable?

    1. Same thing AFAIK, just that it works in firefox. it does the trick sending the worst people (Bo, socialist, hihn, etc) into the bye-bye-forever hole…. allows in-line video, pictures,etc. These new ‘buttons’ however are a little bit of an annoyance….

    2. Its written in javascript, so it can be run in either Chrome or Firefox.. I imagine it is subjective whether one is better than the other.

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