Americans Name Government as Country's Biggest Problem, Enjoy Your Obamacare Employer Mandate, Harry Reid Injured by Exercise Equipment : P.M. Links

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  1. What was America’s biggest problem in 2014? Government and its denizens, say Americans polled by Gallup.

    The only solution? More government.

    1. The biggest problem? Government! We just don’t have enough of it!

    2. Hello.

      If you Yanks ever plan an armed invasion of Canada here’s what you can expect as resistance:

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXE_p_1Squg

      1. Global warming will take care of Canada’s army itself it appears

        1. Summer is coming.

    3. What this thread needs is more cowbell.

    4. If only the *RIGHT* people were in charge, it would be fine!

  2. Sen. Harry Reid (D-Nev.) broke ribs and bones in his face during a..

    physical manifestation of the midterm results.

    1. Mandate

    2. What’s his deductible under Obamacare?

      1. The taxpayers will pay it for him.

    3. Prediction: bandages.

      1. It would be hilarious if he came to work all bandaged up speaking all mummified with his arms in a sling…like in the cartoons.

    4. It’s too bad the links couldn’t have been illustrated with the sort of photo that they take of domestic violence victims to try to make them look even more beat up.

        1. good God!

        2. Dude, I just ate breakfast. But seriously, he looks like bat boy.

          http://www.wvencyclopedia.org/…..1276869686

    5. I hate to be one of those double standard whiners but….

      If Mitch McConnell hurt himself on New Year’s Eve, there is no way that the press would ever accept such a vague and lame excuse.

      If it was a Republican they would demand a detailed timeline, access to the equipment so they could have an independent investigator check it out, etc.

      I’d actually have way more respect for Reid if he would just come out and say “I had a real snootfull and stepped on the treadmill not realizing it was already on and it threw me across the room.”

      What True American Hero hasn’t done something really fucking stupid while loaded and ended up hurting themselves?

      1. Who comes up with these dumb stories? Is what really happened that much worse (I guess if you are drunk, the Mormons would look down on you). I have work injuries because I am sometimes clumsy and still haven’t learned how to avoid sharp objects in the server room after all these years.

        1. Don’t feel bad, I’ve cut myself on server rails that stuck out of a bare bones rack before.

          I think the reason it is a story is because someone like Reid just can’t bring themselves to admit that they did something foolish. To them admitting any mistake means that people will begin doubting their infallibility.

          1. To them admitting any mistake means that people will begin doubting their infallibility.

            This guy forgot to hit an ATM so Jim’s pimp roughed him up? Well shit, maybe that damn Net Neutrality isn’t such a good idea, after all.

            1. According to the reports, he was using an exercise band that snapped as he was putting a lot of weight on it, causing him to slam into the counter and cabinets nearby, face-first. Frankly, it seems plausible…freak home accidents happen all the time.

              That said, can’t think of anyone who deserved it more.

    6. Clearly, reality itself finally recoiled at the idea of Harry Reid.

  3. Enjoy your Obamacare employer mandate…

    Where’s my waiver?

  4. Is there any chance that the new Congress can stop the penaltax from actually happening? Or is that just tied up in the law too tightly to do anything about separately? And I suppose Obama would veto any change, anyway. *Sigh* Looks like I’ll be paying a penalty this year….

  5. ‘Sen. Harry Reid (D-Nev.) broke ribs and bones in his face during a…freak exercising accident? That’s one ill-tempered treadmill.’

    I have it on good info that he owed Sal and Mario some cash.

    1. Or maybe the treadmill finally got tired of being walked on by the son of a bitch.

  6. ‘Politicians rush for the nearest TV cameras to say what a great guy the late Mario Cuomo, former governor of New York, was.’

    How long must one wait before speaking ill of liberal deaths?

    1. You don’t ever speak ill of liberal deaths. The dead person just becomes more saint-like as time passes.

      1. Does this mean it is still too early to lambast the liberal lion of the senate, Ted Kennedy?

        1. He was a true statesman.

    2. Play “Ding Dong the Witch is Dead” and see what sort of response you get.

      1. The problem with that is his idiot son is ruling NYS.

    3. Honestly, I’d be more amused if someone on his own side of the aisle came out and said he was a mean-spirited prick who’d never hesitate to fuck somebody over and held a grudge over petty bullshit ad infinitum. Face it, for most of the politicos, the ideological battle is just a show for the rest of us. And you can bet your ass that there wasn’t a long line of people Cuomo fucked over to get as far as he did and that, because of competition to hold the brand, no small number of those people weren’t on his own side.

      1. should read were on his own side.

      2. “He may have been a bastard, but he was OUR bastard, dammit!”

  7. The death of a woman in Cleveland police custody was a homicide, rules the medical examiner.

    But remember, not all homicides are crimes. The term is not really synonymous with “murder.”

    1. Non-cop death by cop is never a crime.

  8. Sudden feels like a fool for being the only person in his office who actually showed up for work today and now may go home early because of that.

    Wait, that wasn’t one of the PM Links….

    1. On December 31 somebody in my office signed for delivery of a box of wine I ordered, when I was five time zones away. I do NOT recognize the name. Have they already drunk it all?

      1. I have!

      2. I used to sign “Homer Simpson” for those types of transactions.

        Box of wine, or box wine? I would only steal one of those.

        1. I’d say it’s a case of wine but it’s a small one.

  9. Apparently some lame old boomer music magazine named “Rolling Stone” has an article critical of the Koch brothers. Wasn’t this the same publication that published the UVA Rape Scandal Hoax?

      1. Top.Men.

    1. It’s really amazing how much energy the Left expends trying to convince everybody that the Koch brothers are the #1 threat to the world, far worse than North Korea. I still am not sure why, other than I guess everyone needs a bogeyman.

      1. Nowadays you can’t blame the Freemasons or the Jews for everything in polite company, so you’ve got to shift targets.

      2. That’s on the right track. I think the Left finds them a useful face for the Tea Party. Despite the sneering, I don’t think it’s possible to overestimate just how venomously they hate the Tea Parties. Post-financial crisis was supposed to be their day in the sun. The neo-cons had been vanquished, “everybody who was anybody” understood that we needed to move to a more managed economy, and the only real questions were about the shape of the progressivism that would dominate American politics for the next generation. The Tea Parties, by offering up even a libertarian-light message (as they initially did), stole that destiny. Rather than the only discussions being about how much we would expand the government’s management of public affairs, there was now a popular movement actually suggesting that perhaps things needed to be scaled back. And, to make matters worse, they actually gained political traction.

        1. Excellent summary. These people have totalitarian minds.

  10. Sen. Harry Reid (D-Nev.) broke ribs and bones in his face during a…freak exercising accident?

    Nancy decided that Harry hadn’t been a very good boy.

    1. Well, I suppose this comment could have been worse. As in, in story form.

      1. I was just about to say I thought that was a chapter in one of SugarFree’s opuses.

    2. a piece of equipment broke and caused Reid to fall and break several bones, according to Reid spokesman Adam Jentleson

      “A piece of equipment”, eh? I trust that gives you enough to, um, run with.

      1. Exercise band, according to the news…probably affixed to a doorway.

        Screws fall out…the world’s an imperfect place. 🙂

    3. You know, in all seriousness, I bet there’s a lot of sex in Congress. Not just with staffers, but between and among the elected members. I mean, it’s not like these people aren’t sleezebags to the core, anyway, so why not sexually, too?

      1. If those two old dessicated sticks (Reid and Pelosi) started rubbing together, they’d burst into flames.

        1. I disagree… they’d burst into granite. Flames should only be used to equate universal passion and creative intensity, Mr. X.

      2. Wait. What? You need to be a ‘sleazebag to the core’ to enjoy fetish-grade or edgy sex? Is that a ‘pro’ in your moniker? I’m just pausing here to emote.

        1. I was thinking more indiscriminate sex, not about the nature of the sex act in question, which I assume involves harm to other citizens.

      3. That’s been the logic behind my little vignettes all along. You don’t concentrate that many narcissists, scumbags and moral degenerates in a single locale for extended periods of time without an entire forest of sexual perversion sprouting for them to gambol through.

        Congress is a never-ending Golden Globes afterparty.

        1. You know who else…

        2. Can you imagine the copulations when the ACA was passed? Congress indeed.

        3. Who let the crocheting biddies out tonight?

        4. I pity the men who have to hose down the House Chamber on a regular basis.

      4. A lot of people find power very attractive, so you’re probably right. It’s probably an open secret until someone pisses off the wrong person. But really, ew.

        1. Eww, indeed, but from what I’ve seen of politics, it simply must be the case.

        2. Garth Ennis’ comic book series, The Boys, is a doctorate-level investigation of toxic fame and undeserved power turning into fertile ground for the most extreme forms of sexual depravity.

          In a society where all superheroes are created to serve as fodder for entertainment industry revenues (after they failed spectacularly as weapons during World War II), they serve as super-celebrities and act accordingly. “Superman” is a rapist that impregnates women with monstrous fetuses that gestate in days and tear their way free. “Wonder Woman” is an aging drunk, desperately trying to forget dozens and dozens of abortions. “Professor X” is an industrial-scale pedophile, running the mansion both as a school for mutants and a childrape pyramid scheme.

          It’s a world so twisted, a CIA-sponsered team of superbastards are the heroes of the piece.

          It’s also hilarious.

          1. Garth Ennis and the guy who illustrated Transmet pissing on superhero optimism? I need to check this out.

      5. Also what SF said.

      6. See I don’t think they would have sex with each other. It isn’t because they are so ugly either.

        The thing that turns pols on is power. If two congress folk went on it, one of them would have to be dominant and there is no way the other would let that go.

        That is why they are always boinking the help. The power dynamic between them and some poor page/intern is what gets them hot.

        1. Nah, dominance is based on seniority, just like everything else there.

          1. I admit that I am no expert on the rules of the Senate, but is it strictly seniority? Or is there also a component based on which party is in the majority? Sort of like committee assignments?

            Maybe poor Harry just got roughed up because now with the GOP in charge, he lost his strap on privileges and is now on the receiving end of one? And being that it has been a long time since the GOP controlled the chamber, he forgot what the safe word was?

  11. Politicians rush for the nearest TV cameras to say what a great guy the late Mario Cuomo, former governor of New York, was.

    “Todos los muertos son buenos.” – Old Mexican saying (not mine, I mean it is a saying, it is Mexican and it is old)

    By the way, it means “All dead people are good” because nobody talks trash of dead people – most of the time.

    1. I would have guessed it meant “All the deaths are good.” Not that I speak much Spanish.

      1. Deaths = Muertes
        Dead people = Muertos

        For instance, The Night of the Living Dead is translated as “La Noche de los Muertos Vivientes.”

  12. On average, 18 percent of Americans defined [“Government/Congress/Politicians”] as their top problem for the year.

    And to think there are those who would defund DHS!

    1. Unfortunately 9% probably think it is just those do-nothing nay-sayers holding up the Obama plans.

      1. Definitely 8%, definitely.

  13. This year’s dominant flu strain is a nasty little bug that’s not well-matched by the vaccine.

    As expected, doctors who are in Big Pharma’s pockets keep spinning the news by saying “well, the vaccines gives you a little bit of an edge in combating the new strain” which means my decision not to spend a single dime on one paid off. Once again.

  14. Thanks Obama! In this case for lower gas prices…not OPEC of course. It’s his energy policies!

    https://twitter.com/hashtag/ThanksObama?src=hash

    1. The stoopid… It burns!

      1. I liked this “Thanks Obama” tweet:

        Anja Dyess ?@anja_marie74
        Upper respiratory infection and an ear infection. #ThanksObama

    2. How on Earth can you credit Obama? I mean, what has he done that’s even remotely good for energy production?

      1. Re: Pro Libertate,

        I mean, what has he done that’s even remotely good for energy production?

        A lot, but in order to use it, we need a new technology that can harness the power of hot air.

        1. That implies that he is also contributing significantly to global warming. Obamapogenic Global Warming.

      2. True Believer syndrome. They really do love Big Brother. And the failure are always due to the agents of Goldstein, not failures of policy or implementation.

      3. He exists, therefore his benificent presence causes all good things to happen.

    3. The Shreek signal has been lit

    4. 6 years later gas prices are almost as low as they were when Obama took office. #thanksobama !

    5. Fuck that shit. My stock options that just vested are now worth $6700. Four months ago they would have been worth twice that.

      Guess I’ll be holding those for a while.

  15. The National Enquirer reports that the famed White House chef called it quits after sustaining abusive behavior from Ms. O

    Kitchen magician Sam Kass got fed up with Michelle’s snippy comments and told the Obamas to take his apron and shove it, insiders told The ?National ENQUIRER.

    Snippy comments! I mean, if it was anything like that poor little Olympic Gold medal champion gymnast (Gabby Douglass) had to endure from Big Momma O for eating a chicken McNugget, I can imagine the hell the chef had to go through.

    1. “She’ll find some reason to turn up her nose, no matter how good a job you’ve done!”

      “You call *this* “Dancing Turnip”?!”

      1. “…THIS is a dancing turnip!”

        Horrified insiders: ‘Moochelle put your bra back on!’

        1. Eewww!!

    2. NOT. SURPRISED. ONE. BIT.

      She must be one nasty piece of work behind the scenes.

      Funny how liberal lionesses are such bitches.

      1. She must be one nasty piece of work behind the scenes.

        Why do you think Mr. O is always golfing? Conservatives who rage on about his vacationing haven’t done the mathematics on his marriage evidently.

    3. The national enquirer, really guys? I mean I wouldn’t be surprised if it was true, but this is just low standards for dirt gathering. There are more reliable sources.

      1. Dude, quit crashing the party. A few of us wives have to vent over cocktails no matter where the shit comes from or do you really want us to get started on your fucking rational ass?

        1. Ah I see. I will break out the pina coladas and readjust my commenting accordingly.

          1. Too late. You pissed off the thread gods… I’m feverishly searching the National Enquirer for any damn mention of an ill locust. Just you wait, mister.

            1. Women are also highly vindictive.

            2. Agile, forget that trashy Enquirer, go for the real deal. The Weekly World News.

              Here is a story that has death and a 23 lb locust.

              http://horrorsnotdead.com/wpre…..gle-books/

              1. Christ, that sort of societal mangling is way fucking above my cocktail and pill infused pay parade.

      2. They got the real story on John Edwards, and have quite the legal department. They may be low-class but they’re not the Weekly World News, just making stuff up.

        1. I will cede John Edwards, but until I see another source, I’m not going to trust the story enough to spread around.

        2. You Bat Boy Deniers should be put in fucking concentration camps!

          How can you mock the WWN?

          Are you really going to sit there and tell me this story is fake?

          http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_G2hJ…..90775_.jpg

      3. There are more reliable sources.

        Indeed — and *finer*.

      4. I thought the Enquirer’s reliability went up after the Carol Burnett stuff, at least for real celebrity stories, since they didn’t want to get sued again.

        Not as reliable as TMZ, though, since Harvey Levin is a lawyer.

      5. “There are more reliable sources.”

        I doubt it. The link was to the American Thinker, and they point out =

        “Say what you will about super market tabloids, but the National Enquirer was the only media outlet to expose John Edwards’ lying and cheating about fathering an out-of-wedlock child. Because it pays news sources, the Enquirer often gets stories that other media miss entirely…”

        That said = isn’t this the second ‘celebrity white house chef’ whose butted heads with Michelle? The pastry chef who was asked to go “lite/vegan” first went @#*&$ apeshit, but then decided it was an opportunity to market their ideas…? I vaguely recall a similar story about a year ago.

        ok, this here

        “On Tuesday, information circulated suggesting White House pastry chef Bill Yosses resigned his position because he was dissatisfied with first lady Michelle Obama’s focus on healthy eating.

        “‘I don’t want to demonize cream, butter, sugar and eggs,'” read one outlet’s headline, excerpting from a Tuesday New York Times story.”

        1. Plus, Michelle appears to be the worst kind of nutritionist snob — the kind that still refuse to accept all the science that butter, cream and eggs are actually very good for you, and it is high-carb diets that make you fat. These types just can’t believe that the faulty dogma they were taught could ever possibly be wrong, because smart people know fat is bad.

          1. She’s just a contrarian snob, period. Anything to get her scold on.

          2. “Fat makes you fat” is the dietary equivalent of “Cure poverty by taking from the rich and giving to the poor.”

            “For every complex problem there is an answer that is clear, simple, and wrong.” ?H. L. Mencken

      6. I bet you they’re more reliable than mainstream presses because they don’t have an ideological axe to grind and are known to paid for legit sources.

        And definitely more trustworthy than, say, Rolling Stone.

    4. It is not hard for me to imagine Michelle as an angry perfectionist who’s rude and demanding towards anyone who works for her. Who can look at her and think otherwise? The Bush First Ladies were probably fine, and while Hilary and (to some extent) Nancy Reagan were probably PITAs, I suspect Michelle would be the worst of the bunch.

      Eventually, all sorts of crap about the Obamas will come out. It’s just a matter of time. After 2016, the memoirs will start to hit. Probably we’ll get a look at his college records, and it will turn out he claimed to be a foreign student in order to get the bennies.

      1. FWIW, I had a buddy who was the lead cameraman for CNN covering the White House for many years. According to him, the public images were sort of the opposite of what you’d think- his experience with Barbara Bush was that she was “an insane bitch, rude to everyone that she thought was her social inferior” and that the Hildebeast was incredibly nice and gracious to the staff and drones like him.

        True? I have no idea, but this guy was a pretty straight shooter (so to speak) and very non-ideological.

        1. Huh. Well, it’s possible.

  16. OMG MY HARRY REID VOODOO DOLL WORKS

    1. I thought it was my treadmill voodoo doll…

    2. Whore Gilmore back at it. I am forced to recall something. I bought my Shiba this man-shaped toy the other day and when he bites it the the man-shaped toy cries very loudly, slowly, and eerily- “Ohhhh….NOOOOoooooooooo”.

      Strange dying cry from the man-shaped toy.

      Anyway, the fucking Shiba was on top of the dining room table again yesterday. So I got pissed at the evil thing and yelled at it and tossed his sorry ass in his way too comfortable cage whereupon he spent the next hour ravaging the man-shaped toy that cried horribly as it died- over and over.

      I laid on the couch and felt very uncomfortable and voodoo-like.

  17. Elly May is dead and Harry Reid is still alive. There is no god.

    http://www.cnn.com/2015/01/02/…..?hpt=hp_t2

    1. Abe Vigoda is still alive, too.

      1. And Al Molinaro.

  18. Any word on what the Friday afternoon document dump out of Washington is this holiday weekend? I figure there’s no better time to shovel it out than today so there’s probably something truly outrageous floating around out there.

    1. Yes. It turns out the Department of the Interior was behind all of the Bigfoot sightings.

      1. The Bigfoot sightings in the White House kitchen?

        1. I wouldn’t know about that, but my sources say that they’re behind every single sighting, including such variations as the Skunk Ape and Smokey the Bear.

          1. I wouldn’t know about that

            Now you’re at the top of the suspect list, pal.

  19. Remember how ENB was scared about speech restrictions from the UK making it over here. I think she was right but this is even more priceless:

    http://www.theguardian.com/uk-…..-terminals

    Money quote:

    However, when Franklin was on his way to a Christmas party in December, he “lost his senses and popped into the local Corals and nobody stopped me from playing the machine, even though I lost thousands”.

    “Lost his senses”. I’ll use that line next time I am a lifelong recidivist deadbeat.

    “I can’t control myself so nobody should have access to that stuff!!”

    “It’s a sickness!”

    Yep. coming to the good ole US of A soon…

    1. excerpt=

      “I know I have to control my gambling, but we need medical help. This is an illness. Problem gamblers are sick and as with any illness I did not choose to be sick.”

      “While for some this line of argument is just a way of evading a gambler’s personal responsibility, many experts are coming to the same conclusion.”

      “Experts”

      ‘Your common sense may tell you = “That idiot lost all his money because he’s a fucking moron who wouldn’t stop gambling.” – but you’d be wrong, because SCIENCE’

      Liberals seem to think is that all you need is some fucking white-coat with a ‘study’, and actual ‘reasoned argument’ no longer becomes necessary.

      “The Science is Settled = Free Will Doesn’t Exist”

      1. All personal responsibility is abrogated. The infantilization of man by the state continues unimpeded.

  20. I think that dude is smoking some serious crack.

    http://www.Way-Anon.tk

    1. I have some serious crack you can smoke, 32. It’s called a fucking chocolate starfish cigar.

  21. Up to I saw the paycheck which had said $7546 , I did not believe that…my… best friend was like realie bringing home money parttime from their laptop. . there sisters neighbour haz done this less than 14 months and recently repayed the morgage on their condo and got Alfa Romeo .
    Learn More Here ~~~~~~ http://www.jobsfish.com

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