ISIS Gets Some U.S. Weapons, Secession Comes to Florida, RIP Ben Bradlee: A.M. Links

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  • Renee Zellweger
    John Harrison / Flickr

    Officials in South Miami, Florida voted to break away and form the 51st state. That's probably not actually going to happen, though.

  • Former Washington Post editor Ben Bradlee passed away at age 93. Bradlee helmed the paper during its coverage of the Watergate scandal.
  • Why do so many ISIS terrorists come from Tunisia?
  • Speaking of ISIS: The terorists intercepted one of the U.S.'s airdropped weapon pallets. The cache of arms was intended for Syrian rebels. That sucks.
  • A Pew Research study notes some interesting differences between conservative and liberal news media sources.
  • Sean Hannity brought Ann Coulter on to his show to talk about Monica Lewinsky. She refused and dove straight into the election: "I'm here to talk about the election and not this aging intern whose greatest moment was being attacked by Matt Drudge."
  • Renee Zellweger is a Face Dancer and people are upset, or something.

NEXT: Michael Sam Cut from Practice Squad

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  1. LAST CALL!!! NYC Reasonoid Meet-Up!!!

    When: Tonight! 6:30 p.m.!
    Where: Rattle n Hum, 14 East 33rd St.
    http://www.rattlenhumbarnyc.com/home

    Updated Beer Menu! ERMAGERD TEH PUMPKINZ!!!

    Anderson Valley Fall Hornin’ Pumpkin Ale
    Anderson Valley Pinchy Jeek
    Cricket Hill Pumpkin Ale
    Dogfish Head Punkin Ale
    Elysian Dark ‘O the Moon Pumpkin Stout
    Elysian Night Owl Pumpkin Ale
    Elysian Punkuccino Coffee Pumpkin Ale
    Elysian Sardonic Dark Wit
    Elysian The Gourdfather
    Great South Bay Splashing Pumpkin
    Greenport Harbor Leaf Pile Pumpkin Ale
    Harpoon Imperial Pumpkin Stout
    Hoppin Frog Double Pumpkin Ale
    Horseheads Pumpkin Ale
    Howe Sound Pumpkineater
    Smuttynose Pumpkin Ale
    Southern Tier Pumking
    Southern Tier Warlock
    Weyerbacher Imperial Pumpkin Ale

    Bear Republic Racer 5 IPA
    Bell’s Two Hearted Ale
    Firestone Walker Pivo Hoppy Pils
    Flying Dog Dogtoberfest
    Founders Curmudgeon Old Ale
    Founder’s Devil Dancer 2013
    Founders Dry Hopped Pale Ale Nitro
    Green Flash Cedar Plank
    Green Flash Green Bullet
    Green Flash Hop Head Red
    Green Flash Imperial IPA
    Green Flash Road Warrior
    Heavy Seas Powder Monkey
    Lagunitas IPA
    La Trappe Tripel
    Mad river bourbon barrel quad
    McKenzie’s Seasonal Reserve Hard Cider
    Rogue Shakespeare Stout
    Rushing Duck Bauli Saison
    Timmermans Framboise
    Troegs Scratch #157

    1. Hello.

      “Why do so many ISIS terrorists come from Tunisia?”

      Too spicy?

      1. Are you suggesting pumpkin beers are terrorists?

        1. Or a terrorist plot. Combining two of the worst scourges upon mankind – pumpkin and beer.

          1. So, you’re one of those people, eh?

            1. Someone who thinks hops have a disgusting flavor and that most squashes are not fit to be foodstuffs, yes.

                1. As I said yesterday, there are also people who don’t like carbonated beverages.

                  1. As I said yesterday, there are also people who don’t like carbonated beverages.

                    But they’re just strange.

              1. Ravioli di zucca is one of the great dishes of this world.

              2. Well, no accounting for taste.

        2. That’s exactly what I’m suggesting.

          /narrows gaze. Strokes pet wolf-bay.

          1. baby. FUH!

            1. I thought you were speaking pig Latin, and stroking your pet Beowulf.

      2. Fuck! My dyslexia made me think that my fellow Minnesodan, Tundra, was a terrorist.

        I was so offended that he didn’t even offer to let me join his terror cell. What is wrong with me?

        1. Minnesota terror cells are the worst.

          Spending all your time talking about crops and fishing, while planning cheese raids into Wisconsin.

    2. Woo! Successfully logged in to the mobile site.

      I’ll be there. Although I might have to send some orphans out to steal an umbrella from a little old lady before I leave.

      1. I’ll be the guy sitting by himself with no one within 20 feet, mumbling incoherently about the libertarianish thoughts in my head.

        And, if if we go by the book, like Lieutenant Saavik, letters would seem like numbers…20-15-13…

        1. I emailed GILMORE but he’s out of town. Is anyone else planning on going? Freedom From, Rhywun or Slammer? I’m not sure who else is in the area?

          My t-shirt will have a bemonocled face on it.

          http://www.laughspin.com/wordp…..er-700.jpg

          1. I have to work and has a sad. I will be there in spirit. Make sure you all have your body cameras turned on and uploading if and when you get Ackbar’d

            1. But what if they use cell jammers!?

              *adjusts foil hat*

          2. I’ll be there. I was wondering if we should have a secret handshake or password or something, but I figured a bunch of morose-looking guys with baroque facial hair would probably be easy enough to find anyway.

          3. Can’t tonight but if I did I would hope they have some beers for normal people.

            1. Why do I even bother to come visit you guys if you’re all working or out or state?

    3. [heavy breathing]

    4. tl,dr

  2. Why do so many ISIS terrorists come from Tunisia?

    Something to do with racism?

  3. A Pew Research study notes some interesting differences between conservative and liberal news media sources.

    Ratings?

  4. Renee Zellweger is a Face Dancer and people are upset, or something.

    Time is a bitch.

    1. She’s claiming it’s all a result of healthy living, bless

      1. And Tleilaxu genetic meddling and large doses of melange?

        1. I fear she has failed the Gon Tufar test.

      2. How did she mess up her eyebrows?

    2. She’s probably a ghola sent to destroy us.

      1. Did someone say ebola?

        1. So is an eghola a hologram?

        2. Actually I meant to reference the latest Apple product, the iGhola.

    3. Indeed it is and Time can never be defeated. Well, except for the magazine Time. They’re going to be defeated soon enough.

  5. Home-made horrors: Photo collection of US Halloween costumes through history show they used to be MUCH creepier when people made their own

    The images cover a period from 1875 up to 1955 tracking Halloween trends
    The earliest home made costumes look sinister compared those from a shop
    The photographs feature children and adults dressed as a range of animals
    Devils, witches and ghosts also appeared very popular in the photographs
    The images were collated by British artist Ossian Brown for his new book

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..d-War.html

    1. That’s what Halloween is supposed to be. I don’t know when it became “dress up as whatever you want day”. It’s supposed to be creepy and supernatural.

      1. *sexy* creepy and supernatural, Zebulon.

        1. Argh. This is where I learn sympathy for db’s mobile commenting.

        2. Sexy? This may be something up your alley. My wife was intrigued.

          1. I think that’s more Jesse’s style.

            1. If there’s a brown bear version of the polar bear costume I’m in. I will also wear the handyman costume and rep a more traditional plumber body type.

              Oh shit. I can just do cutoff Jean shorts and a sleeveless plaid shirt, work boots and a play axe and I’d have a sexy Portlander costume.

                1. At that point I’d just go naked with the mask.

        3. You misspelled “slutty”.

          1. Look, if she’s at least a 7 of 10 without the costume, its sexy. Everyone else just looks slutty.

      2. Watch the Halloween section of “Meet Me In St. Louis.” The kids run around unsupervised, building a huge bonfire and knocking on doors and throwing bags of flour in people’s faces.

    2. darren1, London, United Kingdom, 28 minutes ago
      Never understood it, I don’t see why it’s still acceptable for strangers in frightening masks to knock on vulnerable elderly people’s doors scaring the life out of them? It’s no different to begging.

      1. I bet he’s a blast at parties.

    3. I highly doubt that the girl wearing the spiderman (first appearance – 1962) mask had that picture taken in 1956. Worst article ever. /comic book guy

  6. Sphinx’s missing head found deep within Alexander the Great-era tomb: Female face adds weight to archaeologists’ hopes it could hold the ancient ruler’s mother

    The tomb is situated in the Amphipolis region of Serres in Greece
    Huge burial site is said to date back between 325 and 300 BC
    This means it could have been built during the reign of Alexander the Great
    Two sculpted female figures, known as Caryatids, have been found plus sphinxes, which both ‘guard’ one of the tomb’s entrances
    Now the head of one of the headless sphinxes has been found
    Last week, pictured of a giant mosaic were revealed, which covers the entire floor of a room thought to be the ante chamber to the main burial room
    It depicts Persephone being abducted by Pluto and taken to the underworld
    Hermes can be seen leading the chariot in the mosaic scene
    Experts hope the last chamber holds the remains of a senior ancient official
    There is no word on when archaeologists will attempt to enter it
    Some believe the tomb was built for Alexander’s mother, Olympias

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sci…..other.html

    1. Geez. Not every sculpture with a broken-off nose is a sphinx, guys.

      1. The head belonged to a feline body.

        1. There is more historical info in one Daily Mail article than an entire American newspaper.

    2. Ah, Caryatids, I remember turning them loose on hardy adventurers.

      1. I tried that – they just remained stationary and held up the ceiling. I think I got cheated.

      2. +1 golem

        1. No, no, I had Caryatids and golems in the same dungeon, and they were totally different monsters.

          Conflating the two is like confusing Klingons and Ferengi.

  7. White menaces to society: Keene State and the danger of young drunk white men

    Implicit in her stories was a truth we refuse to tell: These young drunk white men were dangerous. Menacing. And they are made more dangerous precisely because their disrespect for public space and private citizens is seen as mere play, mere college kids having a good time, rather than as a threat.

    But what the events in Keene suggest is that white folks often test the bounds and limits of public decency and order with little long-term reprisal. There were some arrests, and some tear gas. But no dead bodies. No stigma about white anger. No come to Jesus meetings about White America’s problem children. No public discourse about these “menaces to society.” As many commentators on Twitter pointed out, there’ll be no articles about the absence of white leadership, or about how white folks just need to learn respect for public property.

    How does it feel to be white? Does it feel like freedom? Freedom to piss on people and property with impunity? Freedom to burn shit up and live to tell about it? Freedom to threaten old people and wake up the next morning and chalk it up to drunkenness? License to kill?

    1. no dead bodies…License to kill?

      If there are no dead bodies, no one got killed.

      1. Not technically, no, but figuratively they are killing the minorities and womyns, because patriarchy and white privilege. So they may as well be committing murder, because white male privilege is murder.

    2. Freedom to be a droog?

        1. Droogs don’t run.

    3. [eye roll]

    4. How does it feel to be white? Does it feel like freedom? Freedom to piss on people and property with impunity? Freedom to burn shit up and live to tell about it? Freedom to threaten old people and wake up the next morning and chalk it up to drunkenness? License to kill?
      I don’t know, why not ask the guys who got arrested for it.
      That is some incredible derp, right there.

      1. Why ask, when you can engage in the ever popular politically correct technique of mind-reading, which, amazingly enough, always gives you the answer you want?

      2. I would argue that anyone from any race, ethnicity or creed will end up doing something stupid and or dangerous under the effects of massive amounts of alcohol. So yeah.

        1. Yeah, I’m pretty sure college students of all races are capable of getting drunk and acting stupidly.

    5. Yes, how dare you treat people like individuals and not collectivize them by race like the American left likes to do with black people?

      Who the fuck writes this shit? Maybe the problem is that people do talk that way about black people, not that they don’t about white people.

      And at least here in NH, there is plenty of coverage about the threat of drunken college student assholes and lots of hand wringing about the dangers of social media and “outside” party promoters (which does seem to have something to do with the large crowds and multi-day parties that were going on). But nothing about race, thankfully.

      1. Who the fuck writes this shit?

        Someone who teaches navel-gazing identity studies at Rutgers. Surprised?

    6. Substitute white for black, and Keene riots for LA/Rodney King riots, and you will end up getting called out for racism.

      Men AND women or EVERY race are prone to this sort of animal behavior in a mob setting.

      1. I don’t think they are trying to say that other races don’t do stuff like this. But the point they are making is possibly even more idiotic. They are asking why we don’t have the same sort of race focused discussion as happens when black people riot. But it is pretty much Salon-style lefties who make everything about race. It also seems like they want (or perhaps just imagine) white people to define their identity more on race. But if white people actually do that, they are considered racist (and often rightly so).
        I don’t get it. I think people are right that Salon is just fucking with people now to get more page views.

        1. No, they’re that stupid.

    7. “How does it feel to be white?”

      I get sunburned a lot and people can see me more easily at night. I think that’s about it.

      1. Stay inside during the day and wear darker clothes – both problems solved!

        1. and then get accused of being a vampire?

          1. That’s only a problem if someone decides to play slayer.

      2. What about the key to the executive washroom? And the Get out of Jail Free card?

    8. And now…(*insert drumroll here*) how this would read if talking about non-white people!

      Implicit in her stories was a truth we refuse to tell: These young drunk black men were dangerous. Menacing. And they are made more dangerous precisely because their disrespect for public space and private citizens is seen as mere play, mere urban kids having a good time, rather than as a threat.

      Yep, still sounds like it was written by a Jim Crow advocate.

      1. They also like jazz and will make your womenfolk play piano wildly.

        1. Don’t forget about marihuana.

    9. How does it feel to be a Salon writer? Does it feel like mongoloidism? Freedom to say anything that comes to mind, true or not, and when that fails you, you survey the local homeless muttering to themselves? Freedom to butcher reality when you see fit? A license to smeer and slur every political opponent? A license to argue with the imaginary enemies in your head?

      First up against the wall.

    10. How does it feel to be so fucking obvious I can nail the article as a “Salon” in five words or less?

    11. Shockingly there were a few black people in that crowd too. I know, I was surprised too, it being New Hampshire.

    12. Is the point here that drunk white men behave like sober black men?

    13. Do they just not notice that there’s no national outcry supporting these idiots?

  8. Former Washington Post editor Ben Bradlee passed away at age 93.

    Watergate would be nothing today.

    1. It’d be a non-troversy.

      1. Depends whether the President had a “D” or and “R” after his name.

      2. It would make for a shitty video game, that’s fer sure.

    2. How would we refer to scandals without the suffix -gate? Without Bradlee, journalism would’ve died long ago, looking for that term.

    3. RE: Watergate.

      The other day a got an invitation to attend a Torts seminar where John Dean will be giving an ethics talk.

      1. “Ethics” has a different meaning for lawyers than it does for people.

  9. ‘I’m burning my Florida Mom action figure in protest’: Bryan Cranston takes a hilarious swipe at woman who started petition to rid stores of Breaking Bad toys

    Bryan Cranston, 58, took to Twitter to mock Susan Schrivjer’s online campaign to rid Toys ‘R Us stores of Breaking Bad figurines
    Schrivjer said she was ‘shocked and appalled’ the adult-oriented toys were available at the toy giant
    A online petition to remove them has been signed more than 8,000 times
    Toys ‘R US says the figures are in the store’s adult figures section and are clearly marked only for ages 15 and up

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..tores.html

    1. I really hate activist mothers.

      Rather than, you know, parent their own fucking kids, they pull shit like this.

      1. Oh, they parent their own kids too. If you call keeping them wrapped up in bubble-wrap parenting.

        1. These are the same moms who can’t figure out why their kids don’t know what to do when they take away the tv/iPad/game console.

      2. There are three sanctities in the Civil Religion of America: Victimhood, Motherhood, and Womanhood. Everyone else speaks from a position of moral inferiority.

    2. Do they sell sex toys at Toys R Us now?

      1. Toys R-rated Us?

        1. lol.

      2. Yes, but you have to say the secret password (deep dish)

        1. And get the correct reply (sucks).

          1. Except in Chicago, where the reply is “da bears” for some reason lost in the sands of time

          2. It can be good, even excellent. But it’s not pizza. That’s really the sticking point.

            1. I agree, actually. Deep dish can taste pretty good, but it is not a fucking pizza.

      3. *ponders possibilities, strokes chin thoughtfully*

        /Toys R Us executive

        1. +50 Shades of Grey Activity Set

      4. Vibrating teething rings for everyone!

        /Oprah

      5. Sure you didn’t think the Bumble Ball was just for kids, did you?

    3. Ugh. At first I thought it was odd that they were sold at Toys-R-Us, but I didn’t realize they had a section for adult oriented figures.
      If your young child wants a Breaking Bad action figure, you probably need to look at your own parenting.

      This goes right along with with stupid worries about fruity e-cigs and flavored tobacco and 4-loko. Adults don’t get to enjoy any grown up pleasures that might appeal to children.

      1. There was a report on the local news about the NY AG going after Monster for its marketing policies that allegedly cater to under-21s and trying to get them to drink alcohol.

        Somehow, the thought that the 21-year-old drinking age has a deleterious effect never crossed their minds, because political grandstanding against a business.

        1. Monster drinks dont even contain alcohol.

          1. But you can put alcohol in them. And no one ever independently came up with the idea of combining energy drinks and alcohol.

  10. Speaking of ISIS: The terorists intercepted one of the U.S.’s airdropped weapon pallets. The cache of arms was intended for Syrian rebels. That sucks.

    Does it really suck if it’s a terorist and not a terrorist? Also, completely predictable.

  11. Meanwhile in the land of cheese and wine:

    Teen convicted as ‘armed clowns’ spread panic in French towns

    This fear of clowns, dubbed coulrophobia, has swept small towns in Pas-de-Calais in northern France where police report a wave of complaints over people dressed up as the tricksters and threatening passers-by.

    A 19-year-old young man was arrested on Friday after waving a stick resembling a long knife while chasing a group of teenagers, who had to seek refuge in a chip stand.

    He was also sentenced to 105 hours of community service and banned from carrying a weapon for five years.

    1. There’s some sad things known to man,
      There ain’t too much sadder than,
      The fear of a clown….

    2. Puddles nods.

    3. banned from carrying a weapon for five years.

      Are people generally allowed to carry weapons in France?

    4. Huh. This sort of thing is happening in Jacksonville, FL, too. Except in J-Ville, someone is going to get shot over this.

  12. Craft Brewer Admits He’s The Guy Responsible For Town’s Mysterious Count Chocula Shortage

    A puzzled shopper who says she usually eats vegetarian and organic food for most of the year wrote to The Coloradoan saying she splurges around Halloween on her favorite cereal.

    “Every year I greatly look forward to the month of October when I can purchase a few boxes of this delicious chococlatey (sic) goodness,” she wrote, an effort that was stymied when both Albertson’s stores she went to were completely out of the stuff.

    As it turns out, the general manager of Black Bottle, a craft brewing company, had plundered shelves in order to brew beer for the brewery’s Cerealiously beer series. Previous variations include Golden Grahams, Reese’s Puffs and Cinnamon Toast Crunch moonlighting as milk stouts, and this time it’s the Count’s turn.

    1. Why didn’t he go cheap and buy in bulk from a wholesaler?

  13. I am your face dancer
    I’m dancing for money
    I’ll do what you want me to do….

    1. face dancers, face painters…all artists imo

  14. “I’m here to talk about the election and not this aging intern whose greatest moment was being attacked by Matt Drudge.”

    Good one.

    1. I thought her greatest moment was felating the President?

      1. Fellating the president?

        Are you talking about Ann Coulter or Gwen Paltrow?

        1. Everyone gets their moment.

          1. *Tony, at the back of line, taps foot impatiently*

  15. Justice Department Expert Witness: Blacks ‘Less Sophisticated Voters’

    It’s also the case that — well, yes, so it would, empirically more likely affect African Americans. Also, understanding within political science, that people who register to vote the closer and closer one gets to Election Day tend to be less sophisticated voters, tend to be less educated voters, tend to be voters who are less attuned to public affairs. That also tells me from the literature of political science that there are likely to be people who will end up not registering and not voting. People who correspond to those factors tend to be African Americans, and, therefore, that’s another vehicle through which African Americans would be disproportionately affected by this law.

    1. The ‘expert’ is a cracker. Color me suhprized

      1. Been meaning to ask you, are you a real gaijin like myself or just keeping the moniker back in the states?

    2. So, Justice Department Expert Witness says blacks are stupid. I am just imagining the shit storm if this had been said under the Bush administration.

      1. Or, more charitably, blacks are largely ignorant about politics and those are the kind of voters we need.

        1. That’s what He’s saying, not me. Just to be clear.

    3. And tell me again how progressives aren’t racist?

      1. Because they have only the best of intentions, which distinguishes them from conservatives, who twirl their moustaches as their pollution factories grind their child workers into cripples at the tender age of 3 and not only underpays women, but forces them to work unpaid overtime at the company rape-pit.

    4. Just like everything else, it’s a black issue because it’s a poverty issue. Why these people dont control for socioeconomic factors is a mystery. (it actually isn’t, they’re getting exactly what they want)

      1. They want evverybody to be poor!

    5. It seems an odd assumption that more people who are not attuned to politics and public affairs voting is a good thing. Perhaps you should encourage people to be more aware of what’s actually going on rather than encouraging people who don’t actually give a shit to vote. But then they might not vote Democrat.

  16. Officials in South Miami, Florida voted to break away and form the 51st state.

    Take the rest of Miami with you and you’ve got a deal.

    1. Just the tip!

        1. Just the tip!

          *narrows sphincter*

    2. (Part of) the south will rise again!

    3. South of Lake Okeechobee is probably a good line for a separate state. North Florida, South Florida and Central Florida are essentially three distinct cultures, with Central Florida having much more in common with North Florida than the south, which is a combination of New York / New Jersey refugees and Cuban expats. Almost no cultural overlap with the rest of Florida.

      And then there is the Conch Republic, which has nothing in common with anywhere else on the planet and is full of awesome.

      All in all it is very similar to the California debate, with a long state having completely different and incompatible cultures at opposing ends.

      1. IDK; I would posit Central and North FL (think Arcadia, Ocala, Vernon, Havana, Lutz, Live Oak, etc.) are the MOST Southron parts of the state.

        1. And then I reread your comment and realize I misinterpreted it. Sorry, not enough coffee yet.

      2. And then there is the Conch Republic, which has nothing in common with anywhere else on the planet and is full of awesome.

        It’s full of Jimmy Buffett, which immediately negates any and all claims to awesomeness.

        1. Fortunately, Buffett’s influence these days is largely confined to his restaurant on Duval.

          The missus and I rent a house in KW for a week every year, and watch the cruise ships come in five days a week. A couple hundred passengers will make their way to Hemingway House, while the rest converge on Sloppy Joe’s and Margaritaville. Kinda sad, ’cause there is a lot of cool history and neat watering holes on the Isle of Bones if you know where to look.

        2. ^^^This.

    4. This impetus to wall oneself into like-minded enclaves… I don’t quite get it.

  17. Speaking of ISIS: The terrorists intercepted one of the U.S.’s airdropped weapon pallets.

    I wonder what kind of loot was in that drop. This war is ridiculous.

    1. I’m pretty damn sure it wasn’t an elephant. Although, that would have been interesting.

    2. I wonder what kind of loot was in that drop

      Nothing above green quality, I’m sure.

      1. Green is the highest-quality soylent available.

    3. In a few days, we’ll find out that the GPS coordinates for ISIS and the “moderate” rebels were mixed up.

      So ISIS got the loot, and the “moderate” rebels got the sh** bombed out of them.

    4. Why drop drop a pallet with gps tags in the equipment and then bomb the hell out of them after saying it was a mistake? When do I get to be general?

    5. Watched CNN today do a 10 minute piece on how the US dropped medicene to Kurds in Kobani. At the end they were like, “Oh yeah, and BTW they dropped crates of weapons which were picked up by ISIS rebels. Back to the weather.” Gotta admire, in a way, the blatant spin.

  18. Woman trapped in chimney dated homeowner after meeting online, he says

    “She seemed totally cool until the first flag was her actually being on my roof two weeks ago,” said the man, who did not want to be identified.

    Soon after, he said, he broke off the courtship. But she apparently returned to his roof again early Sunday.

    Ventura County firefighters worked for two hours, removing each brick in the chimney to rescue Nunez-Figueroa after she became trapped inside, fire officials said.

    Firefighters had to pour dish soap down the flue and spray water to grab her arms and pull her out, authorities said.

    1. I can only imagine the howling if it were a man stalking a woman.

      1. Then the chimney would have been to small to attempt entry and he wouldn’t have gotten stuck.

    2. Good lord, that’s all kinds of batshit crazy right there. Also, I remember reading about a similar type of event where a guy dressed up like Santa Claus and tried to go down the chimney in his house to surprise his kids. However, the guy didn’t realize that the flue is much smaller than the brick appears to be and he got stuck as well. Ho, ho, ho indeed.

      1. Also the funniest scene in Gremlins

  19. The terorists intercepted one of the U.S.’s airdropped weapon pallets.

    So here at home where it’s protected, the government wants to document every weapon it doesn’t own. Elsewhere they’re just dropping them willy-nilly.

    1. ^THIS.

  20. Blow by blow, Ferguson cop’s FULL version of why he shot Michael Brown: ‘Incredibly strong’ teen pressed gun to cop’s hip, the gun was jammed by a finger – and kill shot was fired as Brown ‘charged’

    Officer Darren Wilson’s full grand jury testimony leaked to media
    Wilson, 28, first encountered Michael Brown in middle of street
    Ordered the 18-year-old back to the sidewalk but received abuse
    The officer then claims he tried to exit his car but was attacked
    Wilson alleges he was punched by Brown through squad car window
    Alleges that Brown struck him repeatedly and tried to grab his gun
    During scuffle turned it towards Wilson’s hip – who feared for his life
    Wilson managed to fire his weapon and struck Brown in the hand
    Brown fled the car and the Ferguson officer exited the car in pursuit
    Wilson claims Brown charged and did not raise arms in surrender
    Wilson struck the unarmed Brown four times including a head shot
    A separate leaked autopsy report claims that Brown had marijuana in his system

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..treet.html

    Other witnesses have dismissed Wilson’s version of events, and the Brown family’s lawyer said ‘the story doesn’t even make good nonsense’.

    1. Gun jammed by a finger? It just went off? Yeah right.

      1. Apparently neither reading comprehension nor firearms are in your realm of expertise.

        It’s quite easy to prevent a firearm from functioning by putting anything between the hammer and the rest of the gun, or by taking it out of battery. If one is attempting to function the weapon in such a condition, it won’t fire. Once the hammer obstruction or OOB condition is resolved, the weapon will function when the trigger is pulled. Nowhere does it say that the gun “just went off”. The article clearly states that Wilson was trying to shoot but couldn’t because the hammer was blocked, but at some point in the struggle “When Wilson pulled the trigger again, the pistol went off…”, as he had intended it to.

        1. If one is attempting to function the weapon

          Apparently the English language is not in the Mouse’s realm of expertise.

          1. While I am no English expert, I am somewhat of a weapons expert, and the terms “function the weapon”, “cause the weapon to function”, “function the device” or “cause the device to function” are used commonly.

            1. “function the weapon”

              Sounds like something Officer Smooches might say :/

    2. Well, if a cop said that’s what happened, that must be exactly what happened.

      Case closed.

      1. You are all missing the most important point. An officer went home safe that night.

      2. In the days just after the incident there was a radio interview with an eyewitness in another vehicle. Her version of events pretty much lines up exactly with his story- of course she couldn’t see what was happening in the police car – but she reports the scuffle, shot, flight, turn and charge, and fatal shooting.

        I hope the police got a lot of statements recorded immediately after the shooting, because it certainly seems that memories have been embellished pretty strongly since the incident. One would think that this incident would put police unions opposition to wearable cameras to rest. But our experience here in south Florida proves otherwise. Our union chief said cameras endanger cops lives. So there ya go….

        1. Our union chief said cameras endanger cops lives.

          Well, yeah. If people saw the truth about how cops act, then more people would want to kill them.

    3. Meh. Could be but we will never really know because he wasn’t wearing a camera. And if you thought the riots in Ferguson were bad before, just wait until Wilson is acquitted.

      1. Acquitted? He would have to be charged first.

        1. It sounds like the activist types are cheering hard for a no-bill out of the grand jury. They really want their riot.

          1. Basically, if Wilson isn’t charged AND found guilty, there are going to be riots, so we might as well cut to the chase scene.

    4. Ordered the 18-year-old back to the sidewalk but received abuse

      That’s the heart of it right there. What exactly did the cop say to start the incident? Was it “Excuse me gentlemen, would you please use the sidewalk instead of walking in the street?” or was it something more like “Hey, shithead, get your monkey ass out of the fucking road”?

      I suspect Brown didn’t attack the cop for “no reason”, I suspect the cop was using abusive language to Brown, Brown returned the favor, the cop started to get out of the car to teach this uppity Negro some respect for Lawn Order, Brown decided he wasn’t going to stand there and wait for a beating and attacked the cop.

      I’m sure the cop was in fear for his life, but I suspect his fear came from the fact that he had picked a target to bully who decided to fight back.

      1. Under the Zimmerman Rule if doesn’t matter if you provoke a confrontation as long as the unarmed black guy is dead after it’s over.

        1. I live in a neighborhood that has sidewalks on both sides of the street. It’s common to encounter groups of black youth walking in the middle of the street, literally blocking traffic. It’s a confrontational “fuck you” to anyone trying to drive on the street, and daring to honk or shout is “asking for it”. Black or white, armed or not, if you act like a fucking punk-ass nigger, you deserve to get shot.

      2. Yea, there’s no way that a kid who had just robbed a store and was walking down the middle of the skreet carrying the loot openly would have shown disrespect to, or attacked the officer without provocation. No fucking way. I’m sure that Brown reserved that sort of behavior for shop-keepers and random motorists only.

        1. +1

          I despise cops, but I also despise thieves and race-hustlers.

          Each police shooting should be looked at individually.

          I don’t think there’s a whole lot of evidence Wilson acted criminally.

          If that changes, I will change my opinion. But as it is now, he seems justified in his actions.

        2. *Yea, there’s no way that a kid who had just robbed a store and was walking down the middle of the skreet carrying the loot openly *

          You forgot “while stoned off his gourd”.

  21. Ben Bradlee was a pale male who worked for a profit-making corporation. As though that weren’t bad enough, thanks to Watergate, he taught Americans to distrust those in power and to view journalists as watchdogs, when we in more enlightened times understand that those in power are omnibenevolent (except on abortion and Republicans’ foreign policy) and that journalists are supposed to be their lapdogs.

  22. Designer vaginas: Why young women are searching for porn star perfection

    Harriet’s biggest fear was of malicious rumours spread by sexual partners via social media, and bullying, especially from other other girls. She recounts an incident where a girl was bullied about her genitalia on Facebook. “I just thought, that could’ve been me,” says Harriet. “And if a rumour like that spread about me, I would just die.”

    It’s why she finally asked her parents for financial help to have the surgery in June; the total cost including flights to London and accommodation was ?4,000. A week afterwards, she was back at work and after two months, able to cycle and horse-ride again. Five months on, she says it has made a big difference to her self-esteem.

    “I’m a lot more confident,” she says. “There is a big physical difference. I did feel like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders.”

    1. That’s messed up.

      1. Some are nicer looking than others…just sayin’…

        1. I understand that, but I still think it’s messed up.

        2. Probably true, so are some penises. Would you spend that much money insuring against penis-bullying from idiots on Facebook?

          1. If Facebook determined my estimate of self-worth, maybe. But if that were the case, I certainly wouldn’t be on this website.

            1. Not so. I have been a generous donor to Bumping Pretties, a charity which pays for genital beautification in the Third World.

          2. How does a chick even get bullied about her private parts? WOuldn;t she have to show them first? I mean, dude gym showers are relatively open places…womens, not so much (so I hear).

            1. I think they’re expected to take pics and share them on Facebook these days.

              1. Or Tumblr anyway. Pretty sure Facebook discourages that sort of thing.

            2. sexual empowerment means never being criticized about your vagina selfies

        3. + 1 Roast Beef Sandwich

          1. With Horsey Sauce!

    2. “There is a big physical difference. I did feel like a huge weight was lifted off my shoulders.”

      Are you sure the surgeons worked on the right body part then?

      1. Stop othering the medusa-crotch!

      2. Maybe there WAS something seriously wrong with her vagina. Although it sounds like it could come in handy as a built-in scarf during winter.

        1. and that’s why pubic hair can be a good thing.

    3. Stupid is as stupid does

    4. The result really depends on the designer. Was it Calvin Klein (minimal, dull, functional)? Rei Kawakubo (asymmetrical, not fully stitched up)? Rick Owen (protruding)?

    5. That’s great and all, but asking her parents? Really?

      1. What young woman doesn’t want to have a discussion with her father about her oversized labia?

        1. Can labia be oversized? The bigger the cushion, the sweeter the pushin’, as they say in the classics

          1. Well, she considered it oversized (otherwise why have it cut and sutured?)

            I think it’s pretty silly thing to worry about, but it is her body.

            1. and her parents money

              1. They raised a daughter that worries about Facebook’s opinion of her genitals. A little bit of this might be on them. 🙂

                1. I definitely don’t feel bad for them, if they had said “hell no! pay for it yourself”, she might second-guess whether she needed the surgery for her self-esteem after all.

            2. You appear not to have noted my post was basically an excuse to quote Spinal Tap. For shame, Mr Free

              1. Sorry, I’ve just heard that used by chubby-chasers for so many years it has become decontextualized for me.

          2. “Can labia be oversized?”

            Yes, if they’ll stretch from ear to ear, chin to forehead, they’re probably “oversized”.

        2. Fuck. My daughter is three months old.

          My father-in-law made a comment about how important nutrition will be for her because of menstruation.

          It’s already very weird for me. Also, my FIL is an asshole.

          1. That is a little weird and unsettling.

            1. He’s always been very weird.

              He says stuff like that all the time, not in a joking manner, but a serious one.

          2. My father-in-law made a comment about how important nutrition will be for her because of menstruation.

            Given the fairly established link between the length of time between menarche and first birth leading to increased breast cancer risks, slight malnutrition might be preferable in the long run.

          3. wut?

            If my FIL said anything like that – and he wouldn’t – I would ask him WTF is his problem?

            1. I would love to know what his problem is. There had to have been some kind of head trauma somewhere.

    6. First World problems.

        1. Looks like you got yourself a First World problem there, Mr. Servator

          1. It’s first world problems all the way down!

      1. It will truly become a first world problem here in the USA once medicaid is expanded to include coverage for designer vaginas.

        1. And anyone who opposes it will be guilty of war on womyn and against womyn’s health.

    7. I’ve only been with one women with what I would consider abnormally large labia minora. I found it to be be just as delightful as all the other vulvas I’ve had the pleasure to spend time with.

      1. +1 Sleeve of Wizard

    8. PSA: Ladies, the two most important characteristics of your vagina to men: 1) will you let us stick our penis in it, and 2) does it feel good when we do so.

      Everything else is way down on the list.

      1. TIWTANLW

      2. I notice getting consent from the vagina is nowhere in that list. Rape apologist!!1

        1. #consentissexy

        2. You need to be careful encouraging orifices to talk. You might end up with something like this.

        3. Hey, I said “let us”. The consent forms were just understood to be part of the process.

          1. Implied consent is rape.

      3. Its never about what men think. Look at the high-waisted shorts coming back into fashion. No man ever said, “I want a chick who looks like she’s wearing a denim diaper.”

        1. We have a name for women who dress like how men want them to dress. NTTAWWT

          1. Is it “Cool Girl?”

          2. Is it “models”?

            1. Swimsuit models, maybe. The way High fashion models dress has nothing to do with what heterosexual men like.

              1. no-one specified heterosexual men

          3. Please. Guys are way more easily impressed than women think. If you want to get a guy’s attention, slutty is too much. Its like showing a dog a card trick, he only appreciates the attention, not the trick. Wear anything flattering to your shape and then touch him on the arm or shoulder a couple of times. Unless he is an Aspie, he’ll let you know pretty quickly if he’s interested.

            1. Dead on, Brett.

      4. /takes notes

    9. It’s why she finally asked her parents for financial help to have the surgery in June; the total cost including flights to London and accommodation was ?4,000.

      Free-market health care for the win!

      1. It’s just more evidence of the war on women that this wasn’t covered by insurance.

  23. May felon sell his weapons rather than have them confiscated? SCOTUS agrees to hear case.

    The case pits property rights against gun regulations, the Hill says.

    Henderson was banned from owning guns as a result of his conviction, though he didn’t use the firearms in his crime. The FBI refused to transfer his 15 personal weapons to a third party who purchased them, and the courts below refused to order a transfer.

    http://www.abajournal.com/news…..cepts_case

    1. Fuck asset forfeiture.

      1. Yes. The ABA headline said something like “rather than give them up” which made it sound voluntary. It’s not like giving them to charity! It means they are taken away. Gah!

    2. If he was convicted of a real crime (you know, one with victims), they should give his guns to his victims. But that doesn’t seem to be the case.

  24. A con artist who pretended to be in a coma every time he wanted to get out of court apparently managed to keep the charade going for more than two years.

    http://gawker.com/man-faked-a-…..1649146140

  25. Some stupid bitch on Morning Joe said that you can no longer raise a family on minimum wage like you used to. When the fuck was that?

    1. When there was no minimum wage.

  26. Michigan becomes 5th U.S. state to thwart direct Tesla car sales

    Michigan Governor Rick Snyder signed a bill on Tuesday that will keep electric carmaker Tesla Motors Inc from selling its cars directly to consumers in the state, home to the biggest U.S. automakers.

    Snyder said in a letter to members of the state House of Representatives on Tuesday that the measure merely “clarifies” existing law not to allow direct manufacturer-to-consumer retail sales. Those sales, he said, must be made through franchised dealers.

    1. Would you expect anything else from Michigan?

      1. Can we put Snyder and Musk together and piss on both of them?

    2. Bow down to your masters, Mr. Snyder. And get to licking those boots.

      1. “We cut out mandate the middle man!”

    3. Live by the sword, die by the sword.

  27. The winner in Vote-Buying, Brit division:
    Labor party to cure cancer at no cost if elected!

    “The Labour party leader says he will ensure the UK has the best cancer survival rates using money levied on tobacco firms”

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/new…..nment.html

  28. Anti-gun Democrat arrested…for carrying a 9mm pistol. Bill Maher and Ben Affleck hardest hit.

    http://www.examiner.com/articl…..lyzer-test

    1. What caliber for hypocrisy?

    2. Bill Maher and Ben Affleck hardest hit easily internalize the cognitive dissonance.

      fixed

  29. Democratic turnout flyer: ‘If you want to prevent another Ferguson?’

    The Democratic effort to pump up the African-American vote in Georgia just took an interesting turn.

    A reader has sent us this early-voting turnout mailer sent out by the Georgia Democratic party that focuses on the shooting of Michael Brown and subsequent unrest in Ferguson, Mo. It contains an interesting line that concedes the problem of low interest among black voters:

    “If we want a better, safer future for our children, it’s up to us to vote for change. The choices may not always be perfect, but the cost of inaction is simply too great.”

    Here’s a complete look:

    1. Isn’t the government in Ferguson run by Democrats?

      1. you and your racist facts!

      2. Not to mention that the Chicago and Philadelphia PDs are among the worst in the nation, and in solid blue cities.

        1. And let’s not forget the joy of progressive NYC’s Stop and Frisk program, targeting mostly minorities.

    2. “If we want a better, safer future for our children, it’s up to us to vote for change.

      Keep electing TEAM Blue and hoping for a different result than you’ve been getting = Insanity.

      1. Exactly. Just like what Maryland is going to do in a couple of weeks. They’ll elect another D Governor and double down on the stupid.

      2. But, but, TEAM RED are a bunch of RACIST EXTREMEISTS!!111!!!!

    3. This is not a new tactic. When I lived in Atlanta my wife got all of the NAACP and DNC mailings aimed at appealing to racial outrage. We had stacks of 11×14 slick cardstock mailers showing the rear of a pickup with chains and a Texas license plate when GW Bush was running. Every election was the same thing, some variation of “Republicans are Klansmen who want to kill black people”. I kept the stuff from the 2000 election for a while, just to see how big the stack would get. There was a lot of really offensive stuff in there. The stack was over 6″ high before I got tired of my experiment and tossed it.

      There are a lot of players in the “gin up black racial fears” business. In addition to the above we received appeals from the Southern Poverty Law Center, the Nation of Islam (I particularly loved my wife’s reaction to the two bow-tie wearing devotees who knocked on our door – holy crap did she rip them a new one), and a good dozen fake “grass roots organizations” fronting for DNC donors. They had every Klan-era stereotype you can imagine in their mailers. Nooses, bodies hanging from trees, burning crosses…

      1. Did they point out that the Klan were basically Democrats? And Jim Crow was enacted by Democrats? I’m gonna guess not.

        1. Well that would just be tacky

      2. Here in KY, a lot of the shit I get is about Gun Stealers who eat live fetuses (Fetii?).

        1. I dont get any fun stuff.

          But both my state House and state Senate race are uncontested. And my former state House race was perpetually uncontested.

          And McConnell-Grimes seems to be about who is lying more about coal.

          1. My district is regarded as a safe seat for people who’ve earned nicknames like “taxin” from his own electorate. I get no interesting political mailers (and maybe two of the dull kind an election cycle)

  30. Rolling Stone publishes some carcinogenic stupidity about the Florida governor race. Reason gets a mention.

    Scott’s crowning moment of Non-Obamaness came early in his term, when he rejected $2.4 billion in free stimulus money to nix a high-speed rail system between Tampa and Orlando, which is currently served by the nightmare of I-4 and daily intercity commute and vacationer traffic. Two independent firms concluded that the rail line would have run at a “$28.6 million surplus in its tenth year” and create 49,900 “job years” through 2014, with 1,100 permanent jobs thereafter. Instead, Scott trusted the negative estimates of the Libertarian Reason Foundation. Which is a cool place.

    As of 2014, he’s still listening to them.

    If only.

    *That last bit is a link to their hit piece on Reason. They don’t really think it’s a cool place.

    1. I’m confused. Is this place cool or not?

      1. It was cool until waffles showed up.

        1. Blue waffles?

    2. …$2.4 billion in free stimulus money…

      These idiots never learn. Just because you’re not paying for it doesn’t mean it’s “free”.

      1. There was no way it would be profitable. Also orlando to Tampa is a 45 minute drive. I was so happy Scott killed that abortion. I voted Wylie anyways because the race is close and if the libertarian can be a spoiler in a major swing state it might bring more national recognition to the party.

        1. So pay $2.4 Billion now, and if a miracle happens, make $28.6 million ten years from now. That’s the fucking stupidest business case I’ve ever heard.

          Rolling Stone really ought to stick to writing about elderly rock stars.

        2. I voted Wylie anyways because the race is close and if the libertarian can be a spoiler in a major swing state it might bring more national recognition to the party.

          AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!11!1!!

          1. The race is separated by 1 percent in a major swing state. If LP captures two points whoever loses will be screaming libertarians stole the election for the other guy. Some deep blue or red state nobody cares, but florida holds a lot of electoral college votes, libertarian might get more national attention.

        3. I actually used to commute from Orlando to Clearwater. I wasn’t going to get off in Tampa, take a bus to Clearwater, and have a 3-4 hour commute. The only people who would have used it would be day trippers.

      2. Do Florida residents pay federal income taxes? Do they use the inflating dollar as currency? Then they would be paying.

        1. I suppose I could reverse my original statement: Just because it’s “free” doesn’t mean you’re not paying for it. Either way, good on Scott for turning it down.

    3. Two independent firms concluded that the rail line would have run at a “$28.6 million surplus in its tenth year” and create 49,900 “job years” through 2014, with 1,100 permanent jobs thereafter.

      Well, there you go. Positive estimates of the outcomes of public works are never wrong.

      1. Independent firms my ass. Who hired them?

        1. Who thinks a 0.12% return on investment is a good deal?

    4. Rejecting that money was one of the reasons I don’t totally despise Scott. I do totally despise Crist. In fact, despise seems too tepid a word for my absolute disgust.

      1. If you didn’t know anything at all about him, the ad campaigns he is running would be enough to generate those feelings. Crist’s positive ads are enough to tell me I don’t support him at all. His negative campaigning is despicable. Worse, they are all over the “on demand” shows on cable where I can’t skip the stupid ad. It really drives home just how despicable his team is. Scott isn’t running any ads there, so I couldn’t tell you what his campaign has been about.

        Crist’s campaign is just horrific. The “Rick Scott hates women” ads are painful to watch. Almost bad enough to keep me from voting Libertarian this time around. Almost, but not quite.

        1. As a side note the local NPR station covered the Libertarian protest debate this morning. The only clip they played was an answer to the question “what would you do differently?”, which he answered “Nothing. We are going to keep running our campaign.”

          That’s all the coverage he has gotten. His fight to be included in the debates, and the fact that he protested the debates by answering the questions in front of his supporters. No coverage of his actual positions, or how he would be different from the Giant Douche or Turd Sandwich. Just “he lamely tried to get included in the debate but wasn’t popular enough to reach 15% in the polls.”

          1. I’m almost six straight months of not listening to NPR. I’m a better man for it. I don’t even miss it.

        2. Crist is the definition of “political whore”. He cares nothing about any of his stances other than he thinks they’ll help him get power.

          1. Also working with Morgan and morgan. I wish those clowns would have stayed out of medpot, I don’t think they help the cause.

          2. Not only that, he’s now being backed by the plaintiffs’ bar, which will expect recompense in exchange for their support. With a GOP-dominated legislature, that may not happen, but who knows?

            I may actually vote for Scott. I just cannot stand the idea of Crist in office. This may be the first time ever I’ve felt strongly enough to not vote LP. Of course, I am opposed enough to that kind of thinking to maybe vote for Wyllie, anyway.

            1. I had the same issue Prol. Scott and Christ are separated by one point according to real clear politics.

              1. I really don’t like Crist.

                1. Shhh. I know, I know.
                  *pats pro lib on back reassuringly*

            2. Your vote won’t make the difference between Crist and Scott, unless it literally comes down to one vote. But it will do some good if Wyllie gets it.

              1. Not really. They’ve gamed the system so far in Florida that a third party candidate would pretty much have to be one of those “major party runner up and establishment candidate decides to run as independent after losing to extremist in primary” style third party candidates. The current official rules for getting into the debates say you have to have 15% support in the polls. But the rules for the local media to cover a candidate says that if you are not important enough to even be in the debate, you are not worth covering at all.

                So good luck getting your niche third party issues before a mass audience.

      2. Unfortunately, Scott’s rejection of the money was only round one in the battle. HS rail in the I-4 corridor is still very much a part of FDOT’s planners dreams.

        A Crist win would most certainly bring the pressure back. Luckily working against him would be the absence of a strong union (and major unionized national construction firms) presence in the state.

        Also, any new federal aid would have to get through Congress and while BO might want to reward a victorious Crist with pork it is unlikely that Congress would OK it.

    5. For anyone who isnt familiar, I recommend StongTowns.org.

      Chuck has libertarianish leanings (moreso at federal level). He hates federal funding, and has shown how it leads to cities taking on future liabilities that will bankrupt them.

      Nothing we dont already know, but he has very specific examples.

      Plus, I now have a very rational reason for my hatred of stroads, a word which I didnt know before I started reading him. I think reason linked to him back in the spring or something.

      1. Thanks!

      2. my hatred of stroads

        I don’t do videos at work but if that’s what I’m thinking of, I’ve never seen anyone outside of a lefty perspective bitching about them. Interesting.

  31. Sky Deutschland Launches 24/7 ‘Star Wars’ Channel for Holidays

    From Dec. 1 to 14, the broadcaster is turning its Sky Hits digital channel into Sky Star Wars HD, programming all six Star Wars films, as well as Star Wars-themed featurettes and documentaries, on a 24-hour loop. All Sky subscribers in Germany and Austria will have access to the round-the-clock Lucas-palooza.

    “We all know that for Star Wars fans it is too long to wait till Dec. 18, 2015 (for the launch of the upcoming Star Wars: Episode VII),” said Sky Deutschland vp programming Gary Davey, adding he hoped the 24/7 Star Wars channel would make the wait “a bit sweeter.”

    1. Including the holiday special?

    2. [singing] Ah. . .Star Wars! Nothing but Star Wars! Gimme those Star Wars.. don’t let them end! Ah. . .Star Wars! If they should bar wars, please let these Star Wars stay-ay!

      And, hey! How about that nutty Star Wars bar? Can you forget all those creatures in there? And, hey! Darth Vader in that black and evil mask – did he scare you as much as he scared me-e-e-e? [turns and screams when he finds Paul the Pianist wearing a Darth Vader mask] My seventh winter up here! [singing] “Star Wars-s-s-s!”

  32. AP-GfK Poll: Most expect GOP victory in November

    Women have moved in the GOP’s direction since September. In last month’s AP-GfK poll, 47 percent of female likely voters said they favored a Democratic-controlled Congress while 40 percent wanted the Republicans to capture control. In the new poll, the two parties are about even among women, 44 percent prefer the Republicans, 42 percent the Democrats.

    In all, the poll finds that 55 percent of likely voters now expect Republicans to win control of the Senate, up from 47 percent last month. Democrats have grown slightly more pessimistic on this count since September, with 25 percent expecting the GOP to take control now compared with 18 percent earlier.

  33. I am sensing a massacre of Democrats in a couple of weeks. They aren’t passing the laugh test.
    http://www.breitbart.com/Breit…..bout-Obama

    Or aren’t even showing up for debates because of scandals.
    http://www.weeklystandard.com/…..16959.html

    1. There’s still plenty of time for the Stupid Party to rear it’s perfectly coiffed head.

      Also, I wish it would mean a change for the better, but it won’t.

      1. Also, I wish it would mean a change for the better, but it won’t.

        A little more whipped cream on top of the pile of dog crap!

      2. “let’s talk about _real_ rape versus _fake_ rape!”

        /elephant

        1. Don’t forget rape-rape

          1. Some prog friends were trying to remember Aiken’s (sp?) name, and one said, “who’s that person who made the dumb remarks about rape?”

            I said, “Whoopi Goldberg?”

      3. How does one rear it is perfectly coiffed head?

        (Apostrophe abuse is worse than what Ray Rice did.)

        1. *hang’s head in shame…*

          1. *nice’s*

      4. About the only real positive is that dickhead won’t be able to appoint any more radical supreme court judges.

        1. We won’t have to listen to Harry Reid’s senile ramblings – not that McConnell is better.

        2. I look forward to Ruth Bader Ginsburg getting replaced with someone like Diane Sykes.

        3. No, that’ll be Hillary’s job.

      5. The GOP will win, and will do jacksh** to scale down government. They will keep eroding our civil liberties, keep spending to heart’s content, meddle more in the middle east.

        1. Sadly, this is quite likely. It’s a thin hope that the GOP Congress will do anything to kick Leviathan in the nuts.

          1. Sadly, this is quite likely. It’s a thin hope that the GOP Congress will do anything to kick Leviathan in the nuts.

            Remember that little stunt Harry Reid pulled to kill the 1st amendment in response to the Citizens United ruling?

            A LOT of republican senators voted for it. Those nimrods are against the Bill of Rights as well.

        2. Nuh-uh! They’ve changed this time! You’ll see!

          1. I think they will come out of the gate making some noise, but 1994 should be instructive. That was openly a reform movement, and it lasted what, a year?

            1. If that.

              1. Indeed. I have low expectations. Things are a real mess now, so we’ll just have to hope some of the newbies will try to do something.

            2. And they’re still talking about it like it was a victory. It’s like my son when he gets his homework done.

          2. Nuh-uh! They’ve changed this time! You’ll see!

            It’s Battered Woman Syndrome, in a political sense. The bastards keep abusing us, and we keep going back to them.

            1. I’m all for them getting control of the Senate, just to slow down this historically bad administration a little more, but that’s about as far as I’ll go. Unless Paul or someone like that receives the nomination, I’ll be voting for Kurt Russell or whoever the LP runs for president.

              1. I am the candidate we are looking for

                Almanian for President: 2016! For the Lulz!

                1. Do you accept foreigners as volunteers?

                  1. Foreigners, no.

                    Invisible furriners, yes.

          1. We’re sliding off the cliff now. It will take affirmative action just to stop sliding. Doing nothing to shrink government means we keep sliding.

        3. But the press will look into to any conceivable hint of corruption if the R’s win. Even if they have to make it up.

          That’s the main advantage to electing R’s.

          (The only reason they would have to make up corruption allegations, are that they are too lazy or unwilling to go to flyover country to investigate)

          1. +1 Wrongfully Convicted Ted Stevens

      6. Actually, in a lot of states with early and absentee voting, it’s probably too late in the game for anything except live dog/dead human to swing many of the races.

  34. “Speaking of ISIS: The terorists intercepted one of the U.S.’s airdropped weapon pallets. ”

    Fast and Furious 2 – the Middle East Edition

  35. OT: Gary Numan’s latest album – Splinter – is really good.
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46kXvXV42Qk

    or

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=51-sOgv3Or4

    A heavier sound than you would expect.

    1. Sounds like he took a cue from NIN

      1. Yeah, if the band had been named Reznor-Numan, I wouldn’t have been surprised.

        Still, better than I would have expected from Gary Numan at this point in his career.

  36. Hey Soave, we dont need a link to what a Face Dancer is around here.

    1. Next thing you know, he’ll be explaining what “You Maniacs! You blew it up! Ah, damn you! God damn you all to hell!” means.

      1. He must have gone to J school.

        Lesson 1: Assume your readers are idiots.

        Lesson 2: See Lesson 1.

        1. Or he had to look it up. At least that means he’s referring to the books and not the film(s).

          1. He could have referred to Brian Herbert’s books, that would be worse.

            1. Oh, Brian, why couldn’t you have learned from Christopher Tolkien? Publish the notes. Annotate them. But do not attempt to write novels from them.

              Someday, I’d like to have the wealth to buy up all of those books and send them down a sandworm’s gullet.

              1. Brian Herbert is to Frank Herbert what Uwe Boll is to Stanley Kubrick.

            2. As I’ve never read Dune, I appreciated the link. LEAVE ROBBY ALONE!

              1. I’m sorry, but you’ll have to hand in your card now.

              2. Huh. Really? How could that be? Did you receive some sort of head injury that makes it impossible for you to read?

            3. Kevin J. Anderson. The same guy who destroyed the Star Wars expanded universe novel series. The man is the worst writer to get paid regularly. Brian made that key mistake.

              1. Herbert controls the rights. It’s his fault. He could’ve waited until a ghola of Frank Herbert was decanted or a Kwisatz Haderach descendent of Frank’s bred.

      2. Plus, the joke is only funny if you get it. If you have to read the link, you wont be amused.

      3. Last night, a Royals fan (and NFL writer) on Twitter posted “Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?” in reference to the Royals’ big deficit.

        Was sad to see how many people didn’t get it.

        1. They fucked up – they trusted us

      4. Simpsons reference, clearly.

    2. *hands robc a loaded maula pistol*

      You know what needs to be done, robc! Go administer a Bene Gesserit lesson.

      1. With a maula? Come on, you know the Bene Gesserit Way. He has to use sex and politics to make things happen over the course of several centuries.

        1. And then fuck it up and get the exact opposite of the goal.

          BG are the worst kind of totalitarians.

          1. Oops, missed it by that much. How fun must it have been to be a Bene Gesserit during Leto II’s rule? Well, we fucked up pretty good, huh?

          2. And then fuck it up and get the exact opposite of the goal.

            How – in that way – are they different from any of the others?

            1. The others die out?

            2. Leto II wins. Maybe the last Duncan Idaho ghola wins, too, though we’ll never know for sure.

  37. Ferguson protestors shout down CNN reporter for being controlled by Jews and run by Zionists

    http://www.theblaze.com/storie…..-were-off/

    1. Can’t they tell the difference between Zionists and Lizard People? They have to keep their conspiracies straight.

  38. Hollywood bigshot/democratic party bagman Jeffrey Katzenberg raises $2.1 million for Hillary Clinton.

    Yeah, it’s looking more and more like she’s running for president.

    1. …and he’s running for the US Ambassador to Japan?

  39. North Carolina’s Democratic Senate candidate doesn’t show up for candidate debate, turning the debate into an extended interview with the Republican candidate.* Rachel Maddow hardest hit.

    http://freebeacon.com/politics…..ng-debate/

    *The Libertarian candidate was excluded, of course

    1. Funny how Rick Scott not immediately going out on stage was a top story on every major network, while this doesn’t seem to have registered a blip. Wonder why that is.

      1. Odd. Must be some explanation. Strange.

        Well, I’m stumped.

  40. Anger after video shows police officer arresting Brooklyn subway musician – after the cop recited the law saying he COULD be there

    Andrew Kalleen, 30, was arrested at a Williamsburg subway stop on Friday
    A video of the incident shows an officer approaching him and telling him he needs a permit to be there, which Kalleen calmly disputed
    Kalleen pointed him to the correct part of the Metropolitan Transportation Authority’s rules of conduct, which showed he was allowed to be there
    But the MTA’s rules differ from state law, which says an entertainer can be arrested for loitering at a station unless he’s been authorized to be there
    The cop called backup and several officers cuffed Kalleen and pulled him out of the station as other travelers yelled at the police
    Kalleen and other musicians held a rally in the station on Tuesday

    https://reason.com/blog/2014/10…..nt_4847978

    1. I’ll take you home again, Kalleen.

    2. Wrong link.

      http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..ormer.html

  41. Elizabeth Warren speaks and plays the sexism card:

    http://www.cnn.com/2014/10/22/…..?hpt=hp_t2

    1. Not the Native American card?

      1. Is there a wretched bitch card?

    2. Can’t wait to see her and Killary* duke it out. I will make popcorn for those debates.

      *That was a typo, but I’m keeping it.

  42. Email from The Nation:

    Accompany us to Havana, Cuba, for a seven-night cultural and educational exchange program specially curated for a limited delegation of fellow Nation travelers. The trip is certain to offer a unique opportunity not only to visit the island, but also to experience its people, politics, culture and history in a way few ever have.

    It’s cool, you won’t have to survive on Cuban rations

    1. They want to sleep with common people.

      1. They want to sleep with common people.

        Done and done. I spent two weeks in Cuba after high school graduation. Let’s just say there is no shortage of eager young Cubans looking for an intoxicated American to whisk them away.

        In all seriousness though, it was a great trip. My godfather was married to a Cuban woman so I got to spend a lot of time with the regular people. From what I remember they generally think people like the ones who would travel there as part of The Nation trip are idiots. But they are happy to take their money.

        1. I hope when the government there finally collapses that it becomes a free market paradise off the coast of Florida, with tourism, rum, sugar, cigars, and all the rest.

    2. The Nation? I hope no gays or lesbians go on the trip. Cuban jail isn’t like Orange is the New Black, dipshits.

    3. b-b-but free medical coverage!

    4. Accompany us to Havana, Cuba, for a seven-night cultural and educational exchange program specially curated for a limited delegation of fellow Nation travelers.

      Fellow Travelers, indeed.

      1. Fucking sickos. How about the oppressed population there that makes any class you care to focus on in the U.S. look like the British Raj in comparison?

        1. I do not understand your comment. What are you saying about the British Raj?

          1. I meant those who ruled in India, with servants and all that.

    5. PJ O’Rourke already did it in “Holidays in Hell.”

      1. And my question is answered before I ask it

    6. Who was it that linked to the old PJOR piece about his trip to the USSR with a bunch of Pete Seeger wannabees?

      1. Which one had the trip to the Amazon with the econuts?

        All the Troubles in the World?

  43. Wow man tim makes a lot of semsedude.

    http://www.anon-way.tk

    1. Stuff huffing glue before lunch anonbot.

    2. You leave Tim alone, anonbot.

    3. Is semsedude a new word for jizz? I can’t keep up with all the new lingo.

  44. So this exists: Potty-Mouthed Princesses Drop F-Bombs for Feminism.

    1. I saw that yesterday. I get that they were trying to be outrageous but come on, they might have been trying to make an important point but I pretty much can’t take any profanity laced tirade seriously. I’m sure it just my patriarchy showing but if you want to have a serious conversation with me then you have to at least try to behave like an adult.

  45. So…Canada Parliament shooter.

    Islamic terrorist? Or Mark Steyn? Or Frenchie separatist? Or anti-shale-oil Greentard?

    So many possibilities.

      1. In Canada? Those are outlawed there.

  46. http://www.people-press.org/20…..ency-scale is interesting. Seems there are more ways to judge ideologic consistency than prescaled ones like the Nolan chart. It may not be possible to easily put into words why (i.e. what principle, if any, is involved), but certain responses cluster, and it seems fairly accurate to label those clusters “liberal” and “conservative”.

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