A.M. Links: Rebel Groups Claim Civilian Casualties in U.S. Airstrikes in Syria, Obama Criticized for Salute of Marine, Romney Could Run for President Again

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  • Obama salutes with coffee cup in hand
    Instagram/White House

    Rebel groups claim that U.S. airstrikes against ISIS targets in Syria also hit civilians. The Pentagon, meanwhile, says airstrikes didn't just target ISIS but also the Khorasan group, reportedly an Al-Qaeda offshoot interested in orchestrating the next 9/11.

  • People with nothing better to mess themselves over are upset at the way President Obama held a coffee cup while saluting a Marine.
  • According to his wife, Mitt Romney could run for president again, especially if Jeb Bush doesn't.
  • The mayor of Boston will appoint a chief of arts and culture.
  • The U.S. condemned a life sentence imposed by China on an ethnic Uighur scholar and human rights activist.
  • India's first probe to Mars, the Mars Orbiter Mission or MOM, is arriving at the red planet.

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  1. Rebel groups claim that U.S. airstrikes against ISIS targets in Syria also hit civilians. The Pentagon, meanwhile, says airstrikes didn’t just target ISIS but also the Khorasan group, reportedly an Al-Qaeda offshoot interested in orchestrating the next 9/11.

    Dec 31st, 2008: the day civilians ceased to exist civilians in the Middle East.

    1. Hello.

      “People with nothing better to mess themselves over are upset at the way President Obama held a coffee cop while saluting a Marine.”

      No Hello for Ed.

      1. I’m not too upset about Obama because a half-assed coffee salute is about what I would expect from him and I bet the Marines feel the same way.

        However, if I were President, the highlight of my day would be the several occasions when I would be allowed to snap a goddamn smart and professional salute to whatever fine young military man happened to be honoring me with same. But that’s just me.

        1. Well said.

        2. Just for the record, if I’m ever president somehow, I’m going to do the salute from the mirror universe. If they don’t like it, fuck ’em–I’m commander-in-chief, bitches. Civilian rule means kiss my white ass.

    2. Congratulations on beating Fisty. Now do it with a coherent post. :-p

      1. May I mambo dogface to the banana patch?

  2. Rebel groups claim that U.S. airstrikes against ISIS targets in Syria also hit civilians.

    In other news, there’s a sale on Nobel polish.

  3. People with nothing better to mess themselves over are upset at the way President Obama held a coffee cop while saluting a Marine.

    2 Jarheads 1 cup.

    1. What the hell is a coffee cop? I want unrestricted access to roasting, grinding AND brewing. Freeeeeedddddooooommmmm!

      1. Well, choking rude people to death requires a lot of energy, you know.

        1. That’s why the police just shoot them.

      2. HA! He fixed it, and now you look like a dick. Or maybe I do, since it looks like I miscopied the text.

        1. Oh I’ve seen this game played before. That is why I responded to you. You lack the power of an edit button. Now all the mocking that should go to Ed falls on you. Check and mate. Mwahahaha!

  4. People with nothing better to mess themselves over are upset at the way President Obama held a coffee cop while saluting a Marine.

    But how much effort would it have been to simply pass the cup to his other hand first?

    1. … and how embarassing would the pictures be if they’d caught him having dumped coffee all over himself while trying to salute?

      1. Tea. Obama drinks tea, not coffee. Coffee is for low class Americans. He’s in touch with high class Europeans.

        1. There’s no such thing as a ‘high class European’. There’s only Eurotrash and socialists.

          1. But they’ve got public transportation and universal health care! That makes them so much better than Americans!

            1. I rode their public transport. The private transport was so much better, and on time!

              1. You know who else wanted public transport to run on time?

                1. Me, this morning, when my train was late?

              2. Meh, in Bavaria and Switzerland the trams and trains are near luxurious for public transport.

          2. If there are high class Europeans, they definitely aren’t the British. And they are the tea drinkers.

          3. “‘There’s only Eurotrash and socialists.”

            Redundant

            1. And there are Nazis and Chavs too.

              1. Still redundant.

      2. Those pictures wouldn’t have seen the light of day.

    2. meh…I’ve seen sloppier salutes from career soldiers. Yes, it is poor etiquette from the commander in chief, but hardly a huge deal. The proper move if your hands are occupied is just to not salute, nod, or say “as you were” or something – particularly when you are the one being saluted. But after a couple presidents were derided for not saluting a time or two, the president is probably conditioned to try and salute no matter what.

      Much bigger things to condemn him for than this. What next? He doesn’t floss? Wears white pants after labor day?

      1. Took a five on the third hole even though he clearly touched the ball with his wedge while lining up the shot.

        1. Bobby Jones would never have done that.

      2. If he’s the commander in chief, doesn’t he get to decide what constitutes an appropriate salute?

        Much bigger things to condemn him for than this.

        Seriously. There is plenty of real stuff to criticize Obama for, yet people harp on stupid shit like this that doesn’t matter at all. I honestly don’t give a shit if he has his other hand down the front of his pants while he salutes.

        1. “Got your ‘salute’ right *here*!”

          1. That’s how I salute the airborne.

            “Got yer leg hangin’ Buddy!”

          2. Total Johnson move…

      3. It’s not a big deal, but I would want to say to him, damn, man, you’re the President of the United States and the Commander In Chief; can’t you at least try a little bit?

        1. Yes, it’s a minor, but telling symptom of a greater flaw – laziness and disrespect for the ‘corpse’ et al.

          1. Exactly. Its not the salute, its what the salute reveals about the President.

      4. I had a mustang PL that would salute with his left hand from time to time. Didn’t even notice it the first couple of times he did it.

        1. And I blame Reagan for the whole mess. If he hadn’t started returning salutes, this wouldn’t be an issue.

  5. India’s first probe to Mars, the Mars Orbiter Mission or MOM, is arriving at the red planet.

    After returning to the Solar System.

  6. Another “cop shooting dogs” story. But this one is fully justified. Two dogs were mauling a man in the street when a police officer intervenes. Kills one dog and wounds the other.

    At least we get a good story about a cop shooting a dog.

    1. He didn’t also hit the person being attacked?

      1. Nope. So he should probably be fired for that oversight.

      2. No, but he was arrested for loitering.

    2. How many times did he reload?

  7. The U.S. condemned a life sentence imposed by China on an ethnic Uighur scholar and human rights activist.

    Usually we send our wiggers to jail for acceptable reasons like drugs.

    1. Drugs are not an acceptable reason. An acceptable reason would be First Degree White Dancing.

      1. Isn’t that only induced by sufficient quantities of drugs?

        1. Drugs are a mitigating factor. They negate the mens rea required for First Degree White Dancing.

  8. India’s first probe to Mars, the Mars Orbiter Mission or MOM, is arriving at the red planet.

    Good thing they’re spending their money on worthwhile things like this. It’s not like most of the country is third world or anything.

    1. And if they spent that money on something else most of the country would still be third world.

    2. Of course they are third world. You wouldn’t expect a first world country to have anything to do with something as tasteless as being probed by Mom.

      That shit is out. Well except maybe Tennessee…

  9. The Unofficial 2014 NFL Player Census

    1. Colts are the fattest team
    2. Buccaneers are the shortest team
    3. Eagles are the whitest team
    4. Vermont is worthless

    1. 4. Vermont is worthless

      Applies even without context.

      1. Except for this bit…
        The state of Vermont neither issues nor requires a permit to carry a weapon on one’s person, openly or concealed.

        1. Since there are no people in Vermont, it doesn’t make much difference. (Don’t let those Mi-Go fool you, tye’re ambulatory Fungi!)

    2. Yeah, that’s so surprising since it has basically no people and they’re all white and in the Olympics for skiing instead.

      1. Even North Dakota mustered 1 player.

        1. Which is a whooping one more than Vermont.

          1. Infinitely more players than Vermont.

    3. Do people in Vermont even play organized sports? Don’t they harvest syrup and make granola all day.

      1. Some also milk cows. And the syrup and granola producers are largely distinct groups.

        1. I bet the granola mixers, syrup tappers, milkers and inn keepers all play softball and beer league hockey against each other. They must all hate the Ben & Jerry’s powerhouse teams though.

  10. Ann suggested that a run by Bush would discourage another run by Mitt because both men would attract the same type of political base.

    There’s the problem in a nutshell.

    1. But they’re both conservatives, and how dare we vote for the Libertarian instead of them!

      1. I love how the GOP keeps nominating moderates, losing with those moderates, and then concluding that what they need to win next time is someone even more moderate.

        It’s like if Budweiser thought they could win over craft beer drinkers if they just made their beer even lighter.

        1. But… what if we took out some hops?

          1. Better yet, let’s take out ALL the hops!

            1. Then you’re almost to something drinkable. Lets keep removing crap.

              1. How about water plus Yellow Die #5?

                That will sell very well.

        2. Mitt Romney as bland, ubiquitous beer is perhaps the most apt analogy of all time.

        3. I would consider voting for Romney if he had the balls to say, “This my wife, Ann, this is my wife Katy, this is my wife Jennifer, and this is my wife Sarah.”

          1. After seeing the ninja sister wives thing on Monday, I’m a committed monogamist. Sure, they were defending their man — this time. Next time, they’ll be taking turns tasering him for leaving the seat up.

  11. The mayor of Boston will appoint a chief of arts and culture.

    The wicked wing of the museum will now have a retahded corridor to go along with it’s awesome corridor.

    1. It’s nice to see people beating Fisty to the punch.

      1. I think you mean its nice to see people beating Fisty to the punch.

        1. I don’t abuse apostrophes, Fisty.

        2. Um… no.

          What is this a reverse grammar complaint?

          1. Direct your gaze to the comment that “beat” me.

    2. To be fair, it’s not like there’s any museums in the city.

      1. Yeah, no way the 50 or so colleges and existing public museums could possibly maintain reasonable arts and culture in Boston.

        1. Of course not, Zeb, those are what killed it in the first place.

        2. They maintain rape culture!

    3. The mayor of Boston will appoint a chief of arts and culture.

      Ben Affleck or one of the Wahlbergs?

    4. I believe it’s Ahts an Cultchah’

  12. The mayor of Boston will appoint a chief of arts and culture.

    That awt is wicked awsum.

  13. Cops slam pregnant woman to the ground in disturbing clip

    http://nypost.com/2014/09/24/p…..-on-video/

    1. Did those heroes go home safely that night? That’s all I care about…

      /copsucker

    2. They’ve hired an efficiency expert to advise them – with pregnant women you get double the amount of police brutality in every blow.

    3. Tulpa in crisis! He loves when cops abuse people, but he also pretends to give a shit about babies in abortion threads.

      1. Cops win that one, power must be fellated.

  14. According to his wife, Mitt Romney could run for president again, especially if Jeb Bush doesn’t.

    He could put 47% of his pets on the roof of his car, too. Doesn’t mean he should.

  15. Dakota Johnson shows off her slim figure as she paddles around the rocks in Sicily wearing a red strapless bikini

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs…..icily.html
    I’d have thought they’d have found a more attractive actress for 50 Shades of Grey. Not saying she’s John material, but come on. She’s average at best.

    1. I thought the movie, like the book, was supposed to appeal to women. Wouldn’t they want a more average-looking protagonist?

      1. Sorta like Lena Dunham?

        1. You are worse than hitler.

        2. That is an insult to average-looking women everywhere.

    2. Plain jane.

    3. In what sample is she average?

      1. Women in their 20s who aren’t fat and haven’t had children.

    4. If that’s average I’ve been hanging two standard deviations from the mean.

      I’d say she is pretty amazing looking.

      1. She’s I-spend-all-day-looking-at-pictures-of-hot -women-who-would-never-cast-me-a-second-glance average.

  16. New survey shows how much money you can save if you quit Whole Foods
    Prices at Whole Foods were, on average, much more expensive than groceries at HEB, Mariano’s and Wegmans

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..chain.html
    In other news, water is wet.
    From the comments:

    Funny how the free-market, libertarian, anti-union owner of Whole Foods is making a fortune by ripping off the Liberals by letting them think organic is good.

    Nice.

    1. If I eliminated all of the Whole Foods spending I would save $0. In any given year I spend a whopping $0 there.

      Huh. The math doesn’t seem to be working out for me.

      1. When I lived near a Whole Foods I would buy dried herbs and spices there since they sell them in bulk. But that’s it.

        1. Milk, wine, bulk items, and sometimes houseplants. I do all my other grocery shopping elsewhere.

        2. They are an excellent fishmonger. Safeway and King Poopers fish is always less fresh (not horrible but if I want anything other than salmon I go to WF). Also, they sell local caught trout at WF. The other stores are starting to but their distro model doesn’t fit the non-farm supply chain so well.

          WF is also a good place to get a steak (overpriced yes BUT nowhere else can I get the quality for the price). If I truly want the best steak I go to Tony’s and take out a second on my house but otherwise WF is decent.

          I also like WF cheese selection.

          1. I would never buy my fish from some place called Poopers…

            Even if they are the king.

      2. That’s why you’re not rich like me – start shopping at Whole Foods and then you can save money when you quit.

        I got rich by buying cars at car lots that advertise “Save $5000 By Buying Here!” – I buy 2 or 3 cars a week and you should see my savings account.

        1. +1 insufficient funds notice.

      3. That’s like a 100% savings man!

      4. We have Sprouts locally. It’s like whole foods, but cheap as fuck for produce and other in-season stuff. As long as we stay away from the prepackaged crap, I can get out of there for $40 a week for the 2 of us.

        Whole foods would easily be $60-80 for the same stuff.

      5. The Whole Foods in my neighborhood sells pints of beer from taps. You can buy one (or ten) and drink it while you shop.

    2. Worth nothing that the 365 brand at Whole Foods is often cheaper than a brand name at non-WF grocery stores in my area.

      1. 365 Brand “Cheerios”. The box tasted better.

        1. Cardboard is an essential source of fiber!

      2. This is what I was going to say. Some things are much more expensive, others are very reasonable. Sort of depends on what you are buying.

        1. Ditto. I think the whole “OMG Whole Foods is expensive” thing comes from the fact that they do sell some expensive things but they don’t brand themselves as a high-class store. The secret to shopping cheaply at WF is – wait for it – don’t buy the expensive things.

    3. I shop at central market for all my snooty groceries. Which is all of em so fuck you guys.

      1. Yep. I shopped at Whole Foods in Colorado when I couldn’t find better fish and meat but as soon as we were back in Austin, Central Market it is.

        I went to Fiesta last week for the first time in 15+ years. Still great for produce and intl. ingredients I see.

        1. I fucking love Fiesta. We need one in Round Rock.

    4. I go there to get the grass-fed non-homogenized milk, Kerrygold butter, and the cage-free no-hormone eggs. These items are much cheaper at Whole Foods, believe it or not. Also, some of their bulk items like bulk walnuts and peanut butter out of the grinder are cheaper too. I can’t afford to even look at their meats though. Seriously, the regular grocery store has the eggs for $4 and up. At Whole Foods they are $2.59. The butter is $4-5. At WF it’s $3.59. The milk, if you can find it, will be $6-7. WF has it for $4-5. I can get bulk nuts for the same price as at Costco, but I don’t have to buy 2 lbs at a time or pay $55 a year extra.

  17. “I’ve said from Day One that I want to elevate Boston’s arts and culture profile,” Walsh said in the statement.

    We know how closely correlated a city’s arts and culture profile is with the city government’s involvement in same. It isn’t as though the Boston city government’s intervention in the city’s cultural life had ever stifled that cultural life and allowed New York to become the nation’s cultural capital.

    1. They’ll have cocktail parties, they’ll produce public art that is primarily god-awful, occasionally great, and there will be lots of meetings and announcements and events all requiring great effort that will give the atmosphere of productivity.

      They’ll spend a great deal of money, feel satisfied, but in the end have little output that people outside their circle will care about.

    2. We will tuhn Bahstan aht into the Big Dig of the aht wuhld!

  18. Heather Graham and tall mystery man have dinner date at Mr. Chow in LA

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs…..ow-LA.html
    She’s still got it.

  19. Now colleges will pick your friends for you.

    Now a more intrusive version of that plan has turned up via the University of Denver, where the chancellor believes a bit of social engineering will push students toward a diverse range of friendships. The chancellor, Rebecca Chopp, argued, “I don’t think it is enough to leave new relationships to chance. ? Let’s cultivate practices in which students make friends not by chance but because we are cultivating friendships around community values.”

    1. Rebecca Chopp needs a gaze narrowed at her, followed by the gaze intensifying to a high enough intensity to burn her to a cinder. This is the dumbest thing I’ve read all month.

    2. “Let’s cultivate practices in which students make friends not by chance but because we are cultivating friendships around community values.”

      Isn’t this what fraternities are for?

      1. No, those have been converted to rape factories, so something else has to fill that role now.

        1. “Rape Factories”. Sigh. I remember passing up the opportunity to rush the prestigious Warty Warty Warty frat.

          1. I heard that all the big partners from Warty, Smith, and Rapesquatch went there!

      2. No, fraternities are for helping meatheads sleep with freshmen.

        1. That is both valuable and friendly.

      3. “Raising a friendship takes a community.”

        Next up: “Let’s ‘nudge’ people toward breakup/divorce when appropriate.”

    3. A racist is one who is both privileged and socialized on the basis of race by a white supremacist (racist) system. The term applies to all white people (i.e., people of European descent) living in the United States, regardless of class, gender, religion, culture or sexuality.

      When I make a word do a lot of work like that, I always pay it extra.

      1. Why would any white person want to go to such a college?

        1. They gave me 24 grand…and it is in Colorado.

          That’s all I got.

      2. “In 2006, the University of Delaware infamously issued before-and-after surveys to find out whether students had become more willing to date people of any gender, race, ethnicity, or religion following the Office of Residence Life’s intervention, which it called a “treatment.”

        1. Is there any limit to how creepy progressives can get? Next they’ll add eugenics into the mix to make sure your genes are sufficiently diverse.

          1. Patience, patience.

        2. whether students had become more willing to date people of any gender

          Why the hell would that change?

    4. What exactly are “community values”?

      1. The values Chopp thinks the community should have – ie communist indoctrination.

      2. *Damn* it, Bard — they’re the fabric of society!

      3. They are whatever values you get when you take a bunch of horny teenagers and put them under the supervision of adults who’ve spent their entire lives in academia.

    5. A racist is one who is both privileged and socialized on the basis of race by a white supremacist (racist) system. The term applies to all white people (i.e., people of European descent) living in the United States, regardless of class, gender, religion, culture or sexuality.

      Well, glad progs finally admit how they really feel.

    6. Wow…When I went there the worst thing we had to deal with was Chancellor Richie putting up a giant gold penis (still stands, just Google DU and you will see it).

      I am embarrassed to have ever associated with that University. Almost all schools have a nice leftist bend but for me they jumped the shark when they released an economic report (try not to puke), at the behest of the state, supporting massive tax increases and bond issuance’s, end to term limits, and the removal of the citizen initiative process. Bastion of freedom…

      1. And then there was that damn racist mascot of yours…

        1. And then there was that damn racist mascot of yours…

          DENVER BOONE FOREVER!

    7. Cornell tries to populate freshman dorms according to some mysterious and bizarre system.

      I ended up marrying the girl across the hall, so maybe they are on to something.

      1. I did the Costanza and entered the opposite of the ‘interests’ section in my bio when I went to college knowing they would pair me with someone who I couldn’t stand. Ended up with another athlete and not a theatre and arts aficionado…

    8. *narrows gaze to Swiss Scowl o’ Disapproval*

      1. “tilts head, cocks an eyebrow in bemusement”

    9. My sister taught at DU. She ran into a lot of entitled students of the “I worked hard so I deserve an A even if I failed the test” ilk. So give them extra credit for diverse friends and I bet they’ll be all over it.

  20. I was glad to see that the morning Brickbat wasn’t any sort of outrageous nutpunch – and then you sandbag me in the AM Links with the news that Romney may be running again. You bastards!

    1. Relax, he’ll only run if he has to make sure the GOP loses again. Jeb Bush and other moderates will probably take care of it for him.

  21. Rebel groups claim that U.S. airstrikes against ISIS targets in Syria also hit civilians.

    Inconceivable.

    1. You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means.

      Sorry, hadda be done.

  22. People with nothing better to mess themselves over are upset at the way President Obama held a coffee cop while saluting a Marine.

    Shouldn’t a servant Secret Service agent be carrying the cup for him?

    1. I’ve got it, it’s not his coffee, it’s the wookie’s

      1. Maybe it’s his new portable teleprompter.

    2. Got pulled off coffee cup detail in order to fill in on fence patrol detail.

  23. Why ESPN Needs You to HATE Jameis Winston and the Florida State Seminoles

    Not exactly an unbiased source there, but it offers an explanation for the hyperventilating sports media.

    Full disclosure: I’m taking some classes at Florida State right now.

    1. I went to Tallahassee once. Seemed kinda empty for the Capitol. How is the college scene?

      1. Probably amazing if you’re sociable, good with women, etc., but unfortunately I’m every stereotype of a libertarian. Your impression of Tallahassee as pretty boring is correct, but (and I imagine this is true for most everywhere) if you live here a while you can find some lesser-known but cool things about it.

        1. but unfortunately I’m every stereotype of a libertarian.

          So how is the hooker scene, drug scene, mexican and ass sex scene?

          1. apparently it is antisociable and bad with women.

    2. Some of us don’t need espn to give us reasons to hate Florida State.

    3. To be fair, that piece is just as much hyperventilation.

    4. Other than the rape charge, which is obviously serious but not proven, I can’t figure out what Winston has done to warrant the hate fest. The stuff he has done like stealing the crap legs just show that he is a dumb ass jock not that he is some kind of menace.

      1. They need to fill the Tebow/Manziel void with some kind of pearl clutching qb.

      2. stealing the crap legs

        You don’t like seafood?

      3. Before I attended FSU, I had previously attended UT. Jameis Winston is both a better quarterback AND dumber than Vince Young.

        1. “dumber than Vince Young”

          Talk about a high bar.

        2. Other than playing for the Titans, what is Young’s connection to Tennessee?

          1. The real UT with the good orange. Mack Brown’s UT. Jerk.

        3. Dummer than Vince Young is really saying something.

    5. I have a hard time believing a non-football star would have gotten less than a hand slap for getting into a bob gun fight that resulted in dozens of windows being shot out.

      Cut a poptRt into the shape of a gun or draw one and its “adios”. Shoot out a bunch of windows and its “two extra wind sprints every day for a week”.

      There is a double standard, for sure. But it’s for athletes in general, not for,conference affiliation.

      1. Give db his keyboard back right. now.

  24. The mayor of Boston will appoint a chief of arts and culture.

    Like countries that have a Minister of Culture? This is pretty much the deathknell of culture for countries. Let people just make any kind of culture without the guidance of TOP MEN!

    1. It’s the darkest of Hackarama in the MA.

  25. Our Use Of Little Words Can, Uh, Reveal Hidden Interests

    In between some Manhattanite’s poetry written for her dog, and a huge helping of outright Marxism, NPR plays something interesting. Well, interesting if you’re like me and sometimes are guilty of overanalyzing people’s behavior.

    1. the use of [um, like, uh, I mean and you know] ? in addition to their function of annoying older people ? was associated with conscientiousness.

      That seems, um, unlikely.

    2. If you want to know more, look up “relational social deixis” as a start.

  26. People with nothing better to mess themselves over are upset at the way President Obama held a coffee cop while saluting a Marine.

    We could figure out what country the coffee beans came from if you don’t think the outrage is silly enough.

    1. Tea. He drinks tea.

    2. There are about a million good reasons to bitch about Obama or make fun of what an awkward dork he seems to be. This however is not one of them.

  27. British turn in “weapons”:
    http://www.barnorama.com/citiz…..r-weapons/

    1. There were no weapons in that collection, just some tools and some art.

      1. I liked the pruning saw, the kitchen knives and a rusty axe. That country is doomed.

        1. When I first started hearing Brits seriously suggest that kitchen knives with sharp points ought to be banned, I knew they were well and truly fucked.

      2. I see a Hitler youth dagger that someone’s granddad probably took off a Nazi. Thank God the forces of freedom won.

        Britain’s a free country, right?

    2. Next up: turn in all your rocks.
      (I’m assuming that is the only weapon older than the knife)

      1. Given that the soil in the UK grows rocks, that would be enough to entomb the bureaucracy and finally liberate the people – who are sadly beyond saving.

      2. According to feminists wouldn’t it be the penis? The British might as well turn those in too.

        1. They already did – years ago.

          1. Considering British women, it might be a mercy.

        2. Well, the penis mightier than the sword.

      3. Hey, what is dirt thrown in the eyes, chopped liver?

        1. We can’t have you chopping any liver here. Please report to the re-education camp.

    3. I could use one of those machetes to chop down the thorn bushes in my back yard.

      1. What? You don’t have a chain-glaive to just stand on your porch and cut down anything in sight with?

      2. Thorn bushes should be turned over to the police for safe disposal.

    4. I love the photo of the cop holding that ridiculous contraption with a smug look of accomplishment on his face.

      It is like a retarded person holding up his crayon scribblings with pride thinking he has created great art.

      What a fucking idiot.

      Who turned in all that crap? Hardened criminal types? Good thing they aren’t armed anymore! Whew!

      Again….fucking idiots.

      1. “Mom! Where is my double bladed steel studded leather stabbing glove?”

    5. When I was there, they tried to starve me to death. No wonder they don’t need steak knives. Didn’t eat a decent meal until I got to Wales.

  28. This is why we must always roll with the punches.

    http://www.CryptAnon.tk

    1. Where were you during all the ray rice threads, anonobot?

  29. The only people,that should even be mildly,pissed at Obama will remain conspicuously silent. He was, after all, going to a climate conference on a helicopter that was specially flown to the city ahead of his plane, where it was used for a short hop until his personal limo took him the rest of the way..later it was flown there ahead of time as well.

    And the cup was styrofoam, for fuck sake, which is a bigger foul that having fourteen vacations a year and having the biggest carbon footprint this side of Leo DiCaprio…unless you’re an “advocate”.

    But the climateers swoon like he’s the second coming,of Jesus Christ even though his carbon footprint is about the same as that of a small, Midwestern town’s.

    1. Small towns don’t have their own helicopters…

      1. Only the ones that haven’t heard of the 1033 Program.

        1. “Chief! Looks like we can get a Kiowa Warrior if we want!!!”

  30. It is more common among French Acadians in Nova Scotia, people of Hispanic descent in specific parts of Colorado and New Mexico, and a small Bedouin group in Israel.

    My parents have some ‘splainin’ to do.

    1. So apparently Im a carrier for a pretty nasty genetic disorder. My wife isnt, so if we ever have kids, not an issue, but its still a little bit freaky.

  31. Lefty rag wonders where peace-protesters are, figures they just went out for a soda:

    “Where are the peace protests over Syria bombing?”
    […]
    “”I think a lot of people are focused on the climate right now, especially young people,”
    http://www.sfgate.com/bayarea/…..775926.php

    Has nothing to do with the fact that they were partisan hacks who could care less about brown people being bombed.

    1. In defense of the more zealous anti-war protesters, I think it’s fair that we at least wait for the bombing to start before condemning their silence. I’ll give them a few days to get on their pedestals.

      And in defense of Cindy Sheehan, she’s kept it real, from her perspective, since,Obama took office. Many others have gone silent but she’s kept true to her principles.

      1. Why, yes, she has. Has she or any of her inner circle written about being abandoned by mainstream leftists and how they feel about that?

  32. saw this yesterday so I’m not sure if it was covered:

    30 Is the New 50: Old Age Is Killing My Dating Life

    At 40, a man is well into hitting his stride, something the guy I’m arguing with is all too aware of, as evidenced when he professes on multiple occasions, “I’m an amazing guy.” “We’re killing it. KILLING IT,” he tells me, while explaining that he’s been caught up in his rapidly expanding architecture firm.

    Alex sees his stock rising. For a man, age brings success, wisdom and the Hollywood-approved wrinkles of Robert Redford. And, while I too find that my career is on the up, it doesn’t matter, because time, for a woman, is hardly as kind as it is to a man. My career successes, my triumphs as a human being, are trumped by the fact that my looks?and my ovaries?have a shelf life. Biology and Sociology 101.

    1. I saw this this is how the author describes herself:

      “Jenny Bahn is a writer and editor (and former model) living in a yet-to-be-ruined part of Brooklyn. You can find her work on V Magazine, CR, The Style Con, Lady Clever, Harry’s, and, of course, on xoJane.”

      No thanks.

      1. Too much baggage for you?

      2. googled the pics though….

        1. She looks like she’d murder you in your sleep.

          1. so that is what the “xo” stands for in “xo jane”

          2. She has a frightening thousand-cock-stare. I wonder why she hasn’t found her soul-mate?

          3. She boils rabbits, for sure!

    2. some more woe-is-me:

      It’s this logic that has most of my 30-something guy friends dating girls fresh out of college. Girls who, in my experience, are less impressive, less striving, less volatile, less successful, less intimidating, less questioning, less pressing, less complex, less damaged, less opinionated, less powerful, less womanly. They are less, and, to a guy not ready for anything?like most of the guys I have dated in New York?less is more.

      A 30-year-old woman is an undertaking, and it’s the real reason Alex has been putting me on the back burner for the past two months, telling me that I’m amazing and that he’s interested and then disappearing to hang out with a 23-year-old instead. Age ain’t nothing but a number, until it’s a number someone else doesn’t want to deal with.

      1. Hmmm, less volatile, less questioning, less damaged and less opinionated? I think I see why her friends are into these girls.

        1. That was my thought too.

          Seems pretty straight forward.

        2. I notice she didn’t mention the word “feminine”. You know, qualities actually attract a man.

      2. less impressive, less striving, less volatile, less successful, less intimidating, less questioning, less pressing, less complex, less damaged, less opinionated, less powerful, less womanly

        “I recognize my grating personality and shoot-for-the-top rabid workaholism as strengths rather than the turnoffs they are!”

        Nothing is less sexy than a woman with a ton of baggage who can’t pry herself away from her work phone long enough to have a conversation that consists of more than a status update from her last trip to the therapist.

    3. Sounds like somebody needs to,get laid.

    4. “I demand that men be attracted to me.”

      Good luck with that.

    5. 1. If you’re a woman who is 30 and unattached, but you don’t want to be, stop dating. If you only “date”, you’re going to be competing with early 20-something women who are still in that “Just having fun” stage. If you want to get married, look for a guy who also wants to get married, preferably older so he still thinks you’re attractive. If you make commitment your priority that removes the non-committal younger, hotter girls from the competition for the kinds of guys who are looking for you.

      2. If you look old at 30 stop partying and tanning. That’s too young to show noticeable age unless you’re treating your body like crap.

      1. That line of logic would require a some kind of real world common sense. You tend to generate more page clicks as a raging harpy.

      2. 30-something is really 37-39 in this context.

    6. Alright, which one of you wreckers and kulaks is mocking this poor lady’s progressive politics in the comments?

      We need new legislation compelling men to lust for 50 year old women. My friends, it’s time for Orgasm Redistribution. It’s only fair. While we’re at it, we could use a law to rectify the unfair distribution of male endowment, the Package Fairness Act.

      (Just striving for a better world through Progressive principles)

  33. http://www.washingtonpost.com/…..-opinions/

    This is no kidding fascism. Let one side engage in crimes and have the law look the other way.

    1. It’s massholes all the way down.

    2. Of course, if the company hired modern day Pinkertons to clear people blocking the public rights of way, I’m sure the Bristol County DA would also look the other way, right?

    3. Fuck’em. When the lights and heat go out they can snuggle up with each other in the bed they have made.

      Double fuck’em.

  34. The mayor of Boston will appoint a chief of arts and culture.

    That’s the one thing that Boston really needs.

    India’s first probe to Mars, the Mars Orbiter Mission or MOM, is arriving at the red planet.

    It’s the first step in India’s effort to set up a colony in Mars to open a taxi service and a 7-Eleven franchise.

    1. Don’t forget the hotels.

      Side humor: the Smithsonian Natural Hirstory Museum has an Indian exhibit that goes into their culture and impact in America. And, I shit you not, there is a life-size interactive hotel lobby setup there as well as a large taxi cab featurette. Sadly, there is no food or drink allowed in the exhibit so there was no robot Apu in a fake 7-11 for me to get a,slurpee and some corn nuts from.

      But that exhibit was the most hilariously idiotic thing I’ve seen in a while.

      1. Please tell me they also had a Subway exhibit.

    2. “India’s first probe to Mars, the Mars Orbiter Mission or MOM, is arriving at the red planet.”

      If they can fly it upside down, I’ll say WOW!

  35. This one simple secret…

    America’s dark economic secret: How a giant gimmick has wages and jobs hanging by a thread

    Treasury Secretary Jack Lew’s announcement of a series of new rules to reduce the financial incentives behind corporate inversions tells you a lot about where our economy sits right now. Productivity and growth scarcely matter as much as what I would call the “gimmick economy.” Companies now spend an inordinate amount of time figuring out not how to beat their competition, but how to prosper from tricks and loopholes their accountants find buried in the law. Every corporation has become, at the root, a financial company, adept at moving money around on paper and little else. And the government has to scramble in a never-ending race to keep up with the innovations.

    To start with, understand what a corporate inversion is: an on-paper transaction involving a merger between a larger U.S. company and a smaller counterpart abroad. ..snip… It’s a completely fictitious pretension, no different than if I used a handicapped placard to park in good spots everywhere I went, and then limped around after getting out of the car.

    1. “Every corporation has become, at the root, a financial company, adept at moving money around on paper and little else.”

      Yes, that’s right; your neighbor’s S-corp that he created for his one-man business is exactly the same as GE Capital, and the government has to race around trying to keep ahead of these innovations. I wonder if it hurts to be that stupid.

      1. No, it doesn’t hurt to be that stupid. If it did the human race would be a lot better off, both because the very stupid would be in too much pain to do any damage and because it would be obvious who they were and (hopefully) no one would reproduce with them.

    2. how to prosper from tricks and loopholes their accountants find buried in the law

      In other words, obeying the law.

      1. It’s like taking a swing at a guy, and then being pissed off that he didn’t stand still for it.

    3. So…

      Corporations spend too much time and effort trying to work around a complex set of rules that affect their profits.

      What we need, therefore, are more rules!

      It’s a completely fictitious pretension, no different than if I used a handicapped placard to park in good spots everywhere I went, and then limped around after getting out of the car.

      It’s no different, except that one fictitious pretension is (was?) legal, and the other is not.

  36. Feminism’s ugly internal clash: Why its future is not up to white women

    Our feminism looks like an end to police repression of minority communities, access to quality public schools that do not expel our children for minor infractions, and an end to the prison industrial complex, which locks up far too many of our men and women, fracturing families and creating further economic burdens when our loved ones are released. We need comprehensive healthcare and access to abortion clinics, but we also need a robust mental health care system, that can address long centuries of racist, sexist, sexual and emotional trauma. We need equal pay, yes. But we also need good jobs, rather than being relegated to an endless cycle of low-wage work.

    White women’s feminisms still center around equality, a point on which Traister and Shulevitz converge. Black women’s feminisms demand justice. There is a difference. One kind of feminism focuses on the policies that will help women integrate fully into the existing American system. The other recognizes the fundamental flaws in the system and seeks its complete and total transformation.

    1. If only a nice man government would take care of them…

    2. We need comprehensive healthcare and access to abortion clinics, but we also need a robust mental health care system, that can address long centuries of racist, sexist, sexual and emotional trauma.

      They’re rather long-lived, aren’t they?

  37. Chinese restaurant admits to selling ‘opium-laced noodles’

    Liu Juyou, a customer at the restaurant in Yan’an in the Shaanxi province, made the discovery after he tested positive for drugs during a routine traffic stop ? despite the fact that he says he has never taken drugs in his life. Juyou suspected the restaurant’s food was behind his test results, since he had eaten there mere hours before.

    To confirm his suspicion, Juyou asked some of his relatives to eat at the shop and then drug-test themselves, and as it turns out, their urine tested positive for drugs, too.

    The store’s owner, identified as Zhang, confessed to the Xi’an Evening News that he had crushed poppy buds into powder and added it in with the seasoning to his noodles. The result, as the BBC notes, was “opium-laced noodles.”

    1. It just added that little something that the noodles were needing. He’s just a forward-thinking chef.

    2. No worse than the Colonel, with his wee, beady eyes putting chemicals in his chicken that makes on claim it fortnightly.

  38. Companies now spend an inordinate amount of time figuring out not how to beat their competition, but how to prosper from tricks and loopholes their accountants find buried in the law. Every corporation has become, at the root, a financial company, adept at moving money around on paper and little else. And the government has to scramble in a never-ending race to keep up with the innovations.

    Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain! It’s all the kkkorporations’ fault!

    1. So, after years, or even decades of trying to better serve customers firms now find it more profitable to divert resources to dealing with the ever expanding imperial government. Must be market failure.

  39. Has anyone seen the Parker/Stone musical ‘Book of Mormons?’ Would you recommend?

    1. My brother saw it but didn’t find it very good – and he’s a big fan of P&S.

    2. I thought it was AWESOME. No joke i really enjoyed it. However, Avenue Q was funnier.

    3. Saw it, loved it. Really great show all around.

  40. “Malfoy bought the whole team brand-new Nimbus Cleansweeps!” Ron said, like a poor person. “That’s not fair!”

    “Everything that is possible is fair,” Harry reminded him gently. “If he is able to purchase better equipment, that is his right as an individual. How is Draco’s superior purchasing ability qualitatively different from my superior Snitch-catching ability?”

    “I guess it isn’t,” Ron said crossly.

    Harry laughed, cool and remote, like if a mountain were to laugh. “Someday you’ll understand, Ron.”

    Harry Potter and The Philosopher’s Objectivism.

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