Obama and Military Leaders Disagree on ISIS Strategy, Biden's Sex Gaffe, CIA Stops Spying in Europe: P.M. Links

• Obama says the Islamic State "doesn't frighten us." So, the only thing to fear is … the fact that even military leaders aren't so sure about Obama's strategy to fight the terrorist group. Even lowly House Democrats are openly calling Big O's plan "lame."  

• Vice President Joe Biden was at a women's event bashing Republicans when he walked himself right into another gaffe by praising an ex-senator who was expelled for sexual misconduct.
• The CIA was reportedly ordered to stand down on spying on friendly European governments. These happen from time to time, but "never this long or this deep" says one former official.
• Alleged cop killer Eric Frein has been on the run in Pennsylvania for seven days. The FBI just put him on the Most Wanted list and is offering $100,000 reward for information
• Jesus toast, slippery bananas, and cat poop mind-control parasite research all won big at the Ig Nobel Prize ceremony.
• Former Vice President Al Gore recently filed a lawsuit against Al Jazeera. Now they're suing him right back.
• Following the defeat of the Scottish independence referendum, Scottish First Minister and National Party leader Alex Salmond announced he's stepping down.
• A Russian company bought Pabst Blue Ribbon for about $700 million.
• People are going apeshit over the new iPhone. 

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Comments

[Fist of Etiquette]

People are going apeshit over the new iPhone.

This line could have been written before its release.

[Pro Libertate]

You could release a phone that was inferior, and the line would be the same.

[db]

You say that like it's a hypothetical.

[Pro Libertate]

No, it was a rhetorical.

Among the investment analyst community, Apple has long been treated as a luxury, not a technology, brand.

[JW]

They could release an empty plastic box shaped like an iPhone and its adherents would lovingly coo over and describe in great orgasmic detail all of the new features that Android and Windows Phone have had for years.

[Pro Libertate]

It's like a Cartier but for phones and without the quality.

I'm not a total Apple hater, and they occasionally do produce a good product, but the problem 90% of the time is that they're absurdly overpriced compared to the competition.

[trshmnster the terrible]

Bingo. Free apple product? Say yes! Pay for it yourself? Just say no!

[jesse.in.mb]

Apple makes perfectly fine devices, but they always fuck up something crucial in one iteration to fix it in the next.

Me: "Hey, why doesn't my second gen iTouch have a camera?"
Fanboy: "Why would you need a camera, it's not a mobile device? In fact putting one in there would be dumb."
Apple: "The third gen iTouch has this amazing camera in it."
Fanboy: "OH. EM. GEE" *fellates Steve Jobs for half an hour*

Repeat this cycle with bigger phones or the retina display on the iPad Mini.

[Zeb]

Based on limited experience, I think they have thoroughly fucked up their laptops (and that is all I'll ever buy from Apple, no iXXX for me). You can't replace batteries or upgrade anything yourself (unless you are clever and mechanically inclined), there are no firewire ports and everything breaks. I always thought Mac had great hardware, but I'm no longer convinced.

[JW]

I don't have a problem with iPhones, just their more flagellant users.

It's calmed down in recent years, but there are still enough around to lay roses on Tim Cook's car as he's driven by.

[Pro Libertate]

We have an iPad 2, which I like very much. It's certainly better than our Kindle Fire, though, to be fair, the latter isn't supposed to be as good (and cost less than half as much). That said, I've heard that there are tablets that are just as good out there.

[JW]

I love the fact that the cardio machines at my gym, relatively new machines, have iPod/phone only connectors on them to hook up and listen through t machine's headphone jack.

It's weird that anyone would do that to begin with (just set your device on the little magazine shelf and plug into it directly), but yes, let's ignore the 10's of millions of people who don't have Apple products.

[jesse.in.mb]

I set up an iPad Mini 2 for work recently and was really happy with it right out of the box. My primary tablet experience has been the 1st gen Kindle Fire, which sucks at both being an e-reader and a tablet. But that's often how Amazon rolls, they put out a really basic product and then improve rapidly from there.

The fact that Amazon locks you into their closed eco-system drives me nuts though. I won't buy any of their newer iterations because of it.

[JW]

I have a Nexus 7 tablet at work. The thing is a rocket ship. Small, light, fast.

I wanted to use them for mobile point of sale, but we stuck with old, reliable credit card terminals. Getting a paper reciept is a big thing with our customers.

[Pro Libertate]

We consume a lot of Amazon content, so it works good for that. I got it well under retail, which also makes me tolerant.

[jesse.in.mb]

We consume a lot of Amazon content, so it works good for that.

They finally updated the Amazon shopping app to include Prime Instant Video. Before that you could only watch video on iDevices and Amazon-branded Android.

[db]

I have a Samsung galaxy tab pro 8.4, which kicks the pants off the latest iPad mini, for 2/3 the price. It has a better display, better processor, better interface, everything.

[Pro Libertate]

I've heard those were better than iPads, but I haven't actually used one.

[db]

If you want one, get the tab Pro 8.4 instead of the newer Tab S 8.4, which actually benchmarks slower due to a weaker processor. The pro is cheaper too, and brick and mortar retailers have stopped carrying it because it beats the newer model that they have overstocked. You can still order the.tab pro online.

[db]

They could release an empty plastic box shaped like an iPhone and its adherents would lovingly coo over

A friend was actually showing off his iPhone 6 otterbox case last night (minus phone). I hope he was being ironic.

[Ted S.]

I thought Apple did release the iNferior.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

Well Jobs did release the Kraken that one time.

[Heroic Mulatto]

My only thoughts on the subject.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Hello.

"A Russian company bought Pabst Blue Ribbon for about $700 million."

First order of business name change! Pabst Red Ribbon.

[MJGreen]

In Soviet Russia, Pabst Blue you!

[Headless Body of Agnew]

So do hipsters boycott PBR like they did Stoli?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Apparently, Joan Rivers posted about how awesome it is today.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Former Vice President Al Gore recently filed a lawsuit against Al Jazeera. Now they're suing him right back.

Al just wants to make sure that evil dirty oil money never sees the light of day.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

A few years back a girl who owned some greeny-thing business somehow and confusingly connected to Gore back in the environmental free money hey-day (run on!), was smoking in front of her office and was talking to someone. I overheard her saying something to the effect "It's all a scam and Gore is a rat.'

She was a true-blue environmentalist and was down on Al.

[Bam!]

Vice President Joe Biden was at a women's event bashing Republicans when he walked himself right into another gaffe by praising an ex-senator who was expelled for sexual misconduct.

What's the big deal? Clinton gets praise all the time.

[cavalier973]

All of Clinton's women were willing. Every single one. See the difference?

[Fist of Etiquette]

Um...

[Heroic Mulatto]

Is that really true?

[cavalier973]

Did I forget a /sarc tag?

I think I have one around here somewhere.

*rummages*

[cavalier973]

As Rush Limbaugh once pointed out, Bob Packwood was actually following Clinton's policy of "one free grope/whatever". Every time the woman Bob kissed asked him to stop, he did.

[Dances-with-Trolls]

/stands down from BS alert.

[cavalier973]

I thought the "every single one" line should have been the signal I was being sarcastic. Or in denial. Yes, I could see where that line might have seemed like something someone in denial would say.

You know what else someone in denial might say?

??? ?? ?????

[Heroic Mulatto]

Blue or White?

[Swiss Servator, Grundgesetz!]

La!

[Dances-with-Trolls]

Really??

[db]

Cleveland Planning Commission approves hanging LeBron downtown

Will they let him down one last time?

[Tonio]

Boo!

[Pro Libertate]

Shouldn't they have executed him before he came back? Cleveland, always getting it wrong.

[Fist of Etiquette]

The CIA was reportedly ordered to stand down on spying on friendly European governments.

And don't smash your hard drives. And don't run guns to Mexico. And don't use military weapons on our domestic population. WINK WINK.

[Brett L]

A Russian company bought Pabst Blue Ribbon for about $700 million.

Thus are all hipsters proven Commies. QED.

[Pro Libertate]

How do you say, "Heineken? Fuck that shit, Pabst Blue Ribbon!" in Russian?

[SusanM]

Heineken ? Trakhni eto der'mo , Pabst Golubaya lenta !

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

And I find out the hard way that Reason is prejudiced against the Cyrillic alphabet.

[jesse.in.mb]

I've gotten it to work by burying it in a big enough block of text, but only sometimes.

jesse.in.mb|5.7.14 @ 3:31PM|#|

What about a gritty period game where you play as an anarchist disillusioned with the Bolshevik revolution. You start with the crackdown right after Kropotkin's funeral and are thrown in prison where you have to cooperate with other political prisoners, escape, and assassinate Lenin. Call it ???????????? (Tyrannicide).

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

You're the one I heard about! The Reason Whisperer!

[Florida Man]

I once saw Jesse block quote an entire thread. True story.

[jesse.in.mb]

Oh shit. I forgot about that.

[Ted S.]

Wasn't that back in the pre-registration days when the weekend threads would get requoted in full by Mary? (Or was it somebody other than Mary?)

[jesse.in.mb]

No, I used a non-standard character or something and it never registered a closed bracket for a formatting tag and formatted every comment underneath it. I think it might have been bold though and not blockquote. It was sometime this year.

[grrizzly]

Will hipsters boycott Russia by ironically drinking PBR?

[Los Doyers]

*rimshot*

[Zeb]

You know what really makes you a hipster? Going on about hipsters whenever Pabst Blue Ribbon is mentioned.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

You sound like a hipster.

*hisses, points finger*

[Zeb]

I have a theory that libertarians are the ultimate hipsters. We are too cool to even have a political philosophy that any moron can understand. Then there are all the puns and food-snobbery.

[Pro Libertate]

That can't be right. Most libertarians I know seem to bathe regularly.

[Zeb]

The thing is, hipsterism changes. As hipstery things become adopted by the mass culture, hipsters have to move on to new obscure things that no one else gets.

Which could be really good for libertarianism. People think I'm weird and have no idea what I am talking about most of the time. Isn't that what hipsters are going for?

[Pro Libertate]

Eschew them and their works.

[db]

Repost:

Two Afghan police officers training at Quantico disappear before their scheduled departure from the country.

"These are two individuals who pose no threat or danger. Most likely, they are just seeking a better life in the U.S.,"[DEA Spokesman] Payne said.

Brilliant threat assessment, Mr. Payne. I hope it's better than the ones that have been done on previous "blue on green" perps in Afghanistan.

[Ted S.]

Payne's threat assessment is just as bad as his cartooning.

[Swiss Servator, Grundgesetz!]

We had folks try that at Fort Riley - they don't want to go back....and if they have relatives already here....they quietly join them.

If they were going to go all shoot-y or such, they do that back home.

[db]

I hope you're right. Good for them if they're peaceful. It's hard to blame people who see a better way of life and try to achieve it.

[Fist of Etiquette]

...he walked himself right into another gaffe by praising an ex-senator who was expelled for sexual misconduct.

They'll forgive Biden, exactly the same way they forgave Lott for praising Thurmond. Right?

[fish]

I understand they're thinking of doing away with the title Vice President and just calling Joe Biden, "The guy who's in charge of managing the day to day operations of the embarrassing gaffe machine that exists in order to distract people from thinking less than flattering things about the president."

True story!

[Wasteland Wanderer]

I thought they were simply going to formalize his title as "Official Assassination Prevention Officer"?

[Heedless]

The Bolshevik Muppet would be perfect for that role.

[Warty]

Yeah, and then when I walk out, I'm gonna put a bunch of metal onto a metal bar and lift that metal over and over like a metal jerk

[Brett L]

with a bar we use for tricep dips

I hope the guy who kills me is man enough to use a competition bar.

[Warty]

That's my favorite part. You don't use any bar at all for dips.

[Brett L]

I assumed she was talking about a curl bar. Sounds like the type of dude who would be curling in the squat rack.

[Warty]

I rarely do curls, but when I do, it's with an Olympic bar and it's in a rack. I DO WHAT I WANT

[Brett L]

As long as you're using an Olympic bar.

[Heroic Mulatto]

Sooooo, you're a very good bad boy?

[Pl?ya Manhattan.]

Because it's your hot body?

[Bobarian (dinosaur hunter)]

Tricep dips are for lifting the planet away from the center of the universe.

[SusanM]

PBR is now owned by the Russkies? Yet another level of irony for hipsters.

[Ted S.]

I was under the impression that PBR was a trashy beer already when I was a kid growing up in th 70s. That and Genesee's line of products.

[Warty]

GCA is God's own beer. Because God is a cheap tasteless drunk or something.

[Zeb]

Cream Ale is the beer that already tastes like someone put a cigarette out in it as soon as you open the can. I think it might be the worst beer in the US. Though Keystone might beat it.

[Idle Hands]

keystone is bad, but Genesee is the only beer the more you have the worst it tastes.

[trshmnster the terrible]

That's because you reach the toxicity levels of about a thousand contaminants that come out of the Genesee river as you drink more.

[Mickey Rat]

Hey, I used to swim in the Genesee River!

[Zeb]

PBR has long been a budget beer. But I find it to be among the best of the very cheap American pilsners. Good for a hot day when you don't want to get drunk.

[PBR Streetgang]

I feel like my handle has acquired a 2nd meaning

[Ken Shultz]

Yet another level of irony for hipsters.

People who trick themselves into drinking shitty beer aren't being ironic.

They're being losers.

[Brandon]

Obama says the Islamic State "doesn't frighten us." So, the only thing to fear is ? the fact that even military leaders aren't so sure about Obama's strategy to fight the terrorist group. Even lowly House Democrats are openly calling Big O's plan "lame."

He's a better military adviser than his military advisers!

[Brett L]

but "never this long or this deep" says one former official.

I feel like this is the ultimate "that's what she said" setup.

[flye]

I was going to go with: If had I a nickel for every time I've heard that...

[Dances-with-Trolls]

A Russian company bought Pabst Blue Ribbon for about $700 million. Now that is ironic.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Even lowly House Democrats are openly calling Big O's plan "lame."

Almost like it was an election year in which the only hopeful strategy is to distance themselves from a terrible president.

[Winston]

Vice President Joe Biden was at a women's event bashing Republicans when he walked himself right into another gaffe by praising an ex-senator who was expelled for sexual misconduct.

The only Good Republican is one who no longer holds office. When will the Dems start praising Ron Paul?

[Brandon]

When Tulpa finds a police shooting he doesn't think is justified?

[Winston]

If they can gush over Goldwater then they can gush over Ron. Wait for the cynical attacks on Rand for not being as libertarian as his Dad but attacking Ron's actual views.

[Dances-with-Trolls]

When Palin's Buttplug holds Obama accountable for his warmongering?

[Heroic Mulatto]

The answer is blowing in the wind...

[Bobarian (dinosaur hunter)]

It's blowin on something.

[jesse.in.mb]

Vice President Joe Biden was at a women's event bashing Republicans when he walked himself right into another gaffe by praising an ex-senator who was expelled for sexual misconduct.

In all fairness, that's a long list of people to remember.

[SusanM]

Well, at least it's not one of the sitting senators he's talking about.

[jesse.in.mb]

I bet you could do a really fun reference website with lots of colors, pictures and lurid descriptions about the sexual misconduct of our political class.

[SusanM]

lol

Blackadder: Right. Now all we have to do is fill in this MP application form.

Blackadder: Now; any history of insanity in the family? Tell you what, I'll cross out the in. Any history of *sanity* in the family? None whatsoever. Now then; criminal record...

Baldrick: Absolutely not.

Blackadder: Oh, come on, Baldrick, you're going to be an MP, for God's sake! I'll just put fraud and sexual deviancy. Now; minimum bribe level...

[Heroic Mulatto]

And yet the identity of the labor "leader" who told Gillibrand that he preferred her to have more cushion for the pushin' remains a riddle wrapped in a enigma.

[Dances-with-Trolls]

If only she were somehow empowered or enjoyed some level of status that could protect her she might feel open to naming the villain in question.

[jesse.in.mb]

Americans don't care for Washington. New research suggests the feeling is mutual.

They surveyed upwards of 850 Federal employees, Hill staffers, contractors, consultants, lobbyists and think tankers. While we know plenty about our elected lawmakers, we know much less about this group of Beltway insiders, who you can think of as the "policymaking community." As a group they play an active and direct role in crafting legislation and setting the tone of national policy debates, but as unelected officials they're largely insulated from the ire of voters.

[O]nly 30 percent of Americans say that government and politics can be understood by people like them; 73 percent of policymakers say the same, as do 100 percent of Hill and White House staffers.

TOP. MEN.

"The most disturbing finding was that members of Washington policy community have a jaundiced view of ordinary Americans, and they didn't know very much about ordinary Americans either," Ginsberg said.

When asked how much they thought the average American knew about a variety of policy debates, like raising taxes on the rich, warrantless wiretapping, and government's role in healthcare, policymakers most frequently said "very little."

[cavalier973]

Americans don't care for Washington.

Our policymakers have a surefire way to deal with this. They're changing the name of the capital to "Women, Children, and Minorities".

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

policymakers most frequently said "very little.

And they'd like to keep it that way, thank you very much

[Doctor Whom]

In Washington, Democrats and Republicans have much more in common than they let on.

* * *

"Your doctor or lawyer are very much aware of their fiduciary duty to you. But public officials don't have that fiduciary sense. They don't view that as their place in life. They think people should do what they're told."

Let me put on my business-casual shocked face.

[jesse.in.mb]

Let me put on my business-casual shocked face.

You, sir, have won today's PM Links.

[kilroy]

Wolcott: I am a sinner who does not expect forgiveness. But I am not a government official.

[Brandon]

We don't deserve our noble public servants!

[Mickey Rat]

They needed a survey to figure that out? All you have to do is pay attention to what the policy community does.

[Brett L]

Is it still wrong to call a woman a "shrill, ineffectual harpy" if the Lightbringer agrees with you?

President Obama hasn't liked Wasserman Schultz since 2011, when she complained to him that she couldn't hire a donor's daughter to the DNC. "Obama summed up his reaction to staff afterward: 'Really?'" the article recounted.

How bad is it when Obama thinks you're incompetent?

[Pro Libertate]

How would he know the difference between competence and incompetence?

[Brett L]

I can't sing a lick, but I know when someone can.

[Pro Libertate]

You're sentient. I'm not convinced the cardboard cutout this country elected twice in some sort of odd collective performance art project is.

[Warty]

Wait, he was mad that she wouldn't give a payout to a donor? Do I have that right?

[Brett L]

No, no. He just thought, because of the fact that the daughter wasn't visibly retarded, that she was well qualified.

[Pro Libertate]

Does anything say more about the Democrats than her being the DNC chair? Holy shit.

[Dances-with-Trolls]

I think she was mad she couldn't give a payout to a donor, which seems even stranger, really. How bad was the person she wanted to hire?

[Winston]

I notice that no one is talking about the fact that gutting the First Amendment is now a mainstream Democratic policy. So I suppose the yutes who support the First Amendment will reject the Senators that want to gut it?

[Tonio]

Needs moar polling.

[jesse.in.mb]

That's what she said.

[Winston]

Ginger Rogers in 42nd Street?

[LynchPin1477]

If Russia ever goes full socialist again, PBR will become even more popular with hipsters.

[Sevo]

"Former Vice President Al Gore recently filed a lawsuit against Al Jazeera. Now they're suing him right back."

Ah, the lawyers' retirement suit; this'll last a long time and maybe Al won't have the money to promote more propaganda.

[Winston]

You Know Who Else resigned after a failed Secessionist referendum?

[cavalier973]

Lincon.

[cavalier973]

Linkin

[cavalier973]

leencun

[cavalier973]

Captain Mal.

[Pro Libertate]

Lee Kuan?

[Doctor Whom]

Richard Colburn? Oops, my bad: He's still there.

[cavalier973]

Jesus toast, slippery bananas, and cat poop mind-control parasite research all won big at the Ig Nobel Prize ceremony

"You're completely normal if you see non-existent faces in everyday objects," Lee told the crowd.

In fact, if you can't see patterns where they don't really exist, you may be lacking in the creativity department, Lee said. But he offered a remedy: "I just found out you can buy a Jesus-face toaster on eBay," he said.

[cavalier973]

In contrast, the pork-in-the-nose trick was truly a life-and-death matter. Physicians at Detroit Medical Center used strips of cured pork as a treatment of last resort when they treated a 4-year-old girl with an uncontrollable nosebleed. The girl had a rare genetic condition known as Glanzmann thrombasthena, which causes prolonged bleeding.

[cavalier973]

Cured pork has been used in the past as a folk remedy for nosebleeds. The physicians remembered that, and discovered that the remedy really, really worked, thanks to clotting factors in the pork as well as the salt's tendency to draw out fluids from the nose.

[cavalier973]

So they porked the young bleeder's nose. Got it.

[Zeb]

The cat poop mind-control parasite thing is actually very interesting.

[jesse.in.mb]

Meanwhile in Cameroon: Drinking Bailey's Makes You Guilty Of Gay Sex

Article 347 bis of the Cameroon Penal Code punishes "sexual relations with a person of the same sex," with sentences of prison terms as long as five years in addition to fines

Once an accusation of homosexuality is made, police make arrests based solely on how individuals present themselves. For example, if a man is found to be cross-dressing, that could be used as proof that he is gay in court. If somebody has a job that doesn't fit their gender, like a male hairdresser, that too could be used against them. A judge convicted one of Togue's clients for feminine mannerisms and for drinking Bailey's Irish Cream, which he felt only a woman would drink.

This kind of makes me want to get girl drink drunk in Cameroon in protest.

[Dances-with-Trolls]

Girl drink drunk can be awesome but the hangovers are brutal.

[jesse.in.mb]

Girl drink drunk usually requires rum, which makes me aggressively... ummm... "handsy." I have a great time, everyone else, not so much.

I will cop to keeping Baileys in my desk because it blends into morning coffee so well.

[DEG]

Bailey's in coffee is the only way to go.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

Repost. It's Pina Coladas this week, keep up.

[Ted S.]

Do you like getting caught in the rain too?

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

I know I'm not into health food.

[John]

Its a little known fact that in many African countries, even saying the word Episiarch makes you guilty of homosexuality.

[Zeb]

Are you sure it's homosexuality? Is anyone really the same sex as Episiarch?

[Winston]

Richard O'Brien?

[John]

It is more of a general being really really gay charge.

[Doghouse Riley Jr.]

If you eat a deep dish pizza during your interrogation, they'll usually let you go.

[John]

Yes. Order thin crust and you are immediately burned at the stake.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Happy Talk Like A Pirate Day!

To commemorate this event, let us look at scenes from the world's worse movies, combined with the world's most awesome song:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ffP-HBbZUF8

[SusanM]

Canadian pirates

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YUY7f0nioRE

[Dances-with-Trolls]

Better pirates

[SusanM]

+1 space herpe

[Zeb]

Fuck off. I'm even more sick of pirates than zombies.

[Winston]

Arr, you will have to walk the plank for that remark matey!

[Zeb]

I thought most pirates were speaking Somali or some SE Asian language these days.

[Pro Libertate]

I'd agree, only pirates are like Tampa's official mascot.

[Mickey Rat]

I would think pirates would be embarrassed to be associated with Tampa after last night's whuppin'.

[Agammamon]

Obama says the Islamic State "doesn't frighten us."

Well, I think that means that either ISIS is not a threat to us (in which case - why the bombing?) or Obama's an idiot.

Not leaving out 'both' as a possibility though.

[flye]

Have the Pennsylvania police started shooting Asian women yet? Pretty sure that's how these manhunts are supposed to progress.

[Winston]

Quoth Nick Gillespie:
voters are smart to stick with the status quo, no matter how miserable it might be.

So how about that libertarian moment?

[cavalier973]

It's now the status quo. No matter how miserable it might be.

[Warty]

Well fuck. I have something in common with a Jezebel writer. Well, besides the crippling body image issues.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

There are two ways to use the Squatty Potty, Edwards said. The easy (and recommended) way is to put your feet up on it while sitting down on the toilet, which raises your legs and simulates a shallow squat. The even more effective, harder way is to stand on the Squatty Potty and lower yourself into a deep squat, either hovering over or barely touching the seat while you do your business.

I have seen the results of this practice and it is not pretty.

[jesse.in.mb]

I remember hearing about this sometime in the '90s. My mother was watching some schlocky Lifetime movie and they used having a squat converter for the toilet as shorthand for them being crazy new-agey hippy types.

Related: In Korea I was on a long hike when my stomach started churning. I had just walked past an outhouse and was *delighted* that none of my friends would be making "Does a bear shit in the woods" jokes.

It was a squat outhouse. I was in winter coat and whatnot. One of the most miserable shits I've taken.

[Warty]

As long as you don't shit in your coat all is well.

Anyone who's gone camping knows that shitting from a squat is way more effective than shitting on a throne. Much harder to get any reading done, however.

[Heroic Mulatto]

I was using a squat toilet in some filthy outhouse on the side of a nightclub on the outskirts of Bangkok that didn't have any sort of plumbing in the club itself.

Having drunk almost 3/4ths of a bottle of whisky, I passed out mid-shit.

That I did not contract septic shock from mega Hep-C AIDS Syphilis Syndrome is a medical mystery.

[Swiss Servator, Grundgesetz!]

The whisky saved you!

[Pro Libertate]

The only time I've used one of those was in Malaysia. I had to pay some 200 year-old woman for the honor of using that "toilet," too. It was like 20,000 ringgits or something, which was $2.00 or thereabouts at the time. Good times, when the dollar was strong.

[Zeb]

Apparently people who squat to shit don't get hemorrhoids.

[Max Power]

This review for the Squatty Potty made me laugh out loud at my desk.

[Bam!]

That being a verified purchase makes it all the better.

[Obama's Buttplug]

And if there is anything more ridiculous on this planet than the sight of a human man wearing a t-shirt and nothing else, I have yet to experience it.

Oh, I don't know.

[Obama's Buttplug]

Oh, he said man. Never mind.

[JW]

:::whimper:::

[Pro Libertate]

Aesthetically, the sexes are asymmetrical. This is why women and gay men are inherently inferior on an philosophical level, because they think men are attractive.

[Juice]

This link sets off the malware detector.

[db]

That sounds...useful. however, I have never figured out how to shit on a squat toilet without removing my pants, which requires a removing my shoes, which...is just too much damn work. Plus, generally the consistency of my deuces is...inconsistent, which makes me apprehensive about spray.

[Warty]

That's approximately how it goes.

[jesse.in.mb]

Scott Lively, author of The Pink Swastika, who proudly claims to have influenced both Russia's crack down on "gay propaganda" that set off a wave of similar laws all over the former USSR, and Uganda's escalation of gay sex to a capital offense (he didn't mean for it to go that far though), which set off a wave of similar laws across Africa, is claiming that the HRC has listed him as an "exporter of hate" to "incite murder against [him]."

While I think the SPLC (and to a lesser degree the HRC) massively overreaches when applying the label of "hate group," Scott Lively is the genuine article. He brags about his involvement in this shit, but then claims he's being unfairly bullied for it.

Without irony he said "And I am demanding a retraction and public apology from both HRC and SPLC. To both of them I insist: STOP INCITING HATE BEFORE YOU GET PEOPLE KILLED!!!!!"

Dear Scott Lively, do the world a favor and kill yourself.

[Winston]

It's not hate if your opponents are fascists, jeez Jesse, where did you learn about hate speech?

[kbolino]

Obligatory "fuck the HRC" but goddamn what a shithead. He reminds me of that communist idiot who whined about getting his laptop stolen.

[Pro Libertate]

Huh. The Human Rights Commission has the same initials as a person who is laughingly considered an actual candidate for president.

[CatoTheElder]

Iranians sentenced to 91 lashes for Pharrell 'Happy' video

A group of six Iranians is sentenced to six months in prison and 91 lashes for releasing a music video in which they dance along to Pharrell Williams' hit song "Happy".

Sure, "Happy" is tiresomely repetitive, but bad music is not a crime, and the video they made is kinda cute. This is just sad.

[Heroic Mulatto]

The Prophet (sallah allahu alieh wasalam) said "There will be in my Ummah those who make halal adultery/fornication, silk, alcohol and musical instruments."

[Zeb]

For pop music, it's not such a bad song.

[CatoTheElder]

Yeah, but this would digress to bashing Pharrel if I didn't pre-empt it. Here at reason.com, the only acceptable pop music ever recorded was by Lou Reed.

[db]

That's okay, I can bash the Beatles just as easily.

[db]

http://news.investors.com/phot.....?id=718049

[Swiss Servator, Grundgesetz!]

Give Warty a bar and enough 45lbs plates, and he will smash the world.