A.M. Links: Obama Defends Executive Power, Snowden Staying in Russia, Ebola Outbreak Worsens

• 

  Credit: White House / Flickr.com

  During a press conference on Wednesday, President Obama defended his aggressive use of executive power. "The American people don't want me just standing around twiddling my thumbs and waiting for Congress to get something done," Obama declared.

• "A new congressional report has estimated that more than 25 million Americans without health insurance will not be made to pay a penalty in 2016 due to an exploding number of ObamaCare exemptions."

• Russia has given NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden permission to stay in that country for another three years.

• "A Homeland Security employee has been arrested in connection with a sting that alleges he used a Craigslist ad in an effort to get a mother and an underage daughter to have sex with him."

• The World Health Organization may declare an international public health emergency in response to the current Ebola outbreak.

• According to a police officer in New Jersey, if President Obama "doesn't follow the Constitution, we don't have to."

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Comments

[Fist of Etiquette]

According to a police officer in New Jersey, if President Obama "doesn't follow the Constitution, we don't have to."

I LEARNED IT FROM WATCHING YOU, OKAY?

[Slammer]

I LINKED THAT LAST NIGHT!

[WTF]

I linked it yesterday morning.

[Jon Lester]

I doubt if they were particularly mindful it before 2009.

[Doctor Whom]

They just have a new excuse.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Hello.

Oboctavius.

He believes.

[Steve G]

+1 this is your brain on drugs

[Lord Humungus]

(Swedish) Government employee suspended from her job for posting nude selfies

A Swiss government worker was recently suspended from her job as a parliament secretary when her amateur porn photos ? which sometimes took the form of nude selfies captured in her office at the Federal House in Berne ? became a national sensation. The woman, known by the Internet aliases A. or Adeline Lafouine, initially asserted that tweeting the photos was part of her "private life," although she also told a Swiss newspaper that worries over her coworkers finding her nude photos were "on [her] mind almost constantly." According to a Swiss Federal Personnel Office spokesperson, government employees are expected only to post images online "that you would at any time show your colleagues, employees or superiors."

[Rufus J. Firefly]

She's no Ana Ciriani.

[Rich]

I *imagine* that's a "stock photo".

[Lord Humungus]

obviously NSFW
http://www.blick.ch/news/polit.....36107.html

[Rich]

Mmmm, swiss cheese!

[gaijin]

always did like Swiss Miss!

[The DerpRider]

She looks friendly!

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

I HAD NO KNOWLEDGE OF THIS.... damn.

[Drax the Destroyer]

Give that woman a raise! (Disclaimer: I have not checked to see if she qualifies as hot)

[Hillary's Clitdong]

Not horrifying, but not amazing.

This pic is safe for work.

[robc]

Do you typically confuse austria and australia?

[Lord Humungus]

too much Ikea

[Apple]

"No, I am Inga from Sweden."
"But you're wearing lederhosen."
"Ja, fer sure, Inga from Sweden. Help me with my rucksack?"

[UnCivilServant]

During a press conference on Wednesday, President Obama defended his aggressive use of executive power. "The American people don't want me just standing around twiddling my thumbs and waiting for Congress to get something done," Obama declared.

Actually, Obummer, I'd be happier if you did just sit around twiddling your thumbs, you've done enough damage already.

[entropy_factor]

it's actually how the system is supposed to work. Congress should be passing the laws, the president is just there to make sure they are executed.

So, Obama- I, an American citizen, would actually like you (and all presidents) to actually just sit there twiddling your thumbs until the representative body passes legislation.

[Bobarian]

And it's not like there aren't enough laws on the books right now to keep your sorry ass busy.

Fuck off, slaver!

[waffles]

He does have some purdy thumbs fer twiddlin'

[Slammer]

Twiddledum.

[Drake]

I am far more comfortable when he's playing golf or cycling around Martha's Vineyard than when's dreaming up Executive Orders.

And it does seem to occur to him that it's his job engage the Republicans in the House and Democrats in the Senate in reaching compromises - not just calling them assholes at fundraisers. I don't remember Reagan or Clinton bitching like this.

Truly the most unqualified and inept President in a very long time.

[Brian D]

But America demands a dictator! Obama said so!

[Jerryskids]

This is specifically why the American people elected Obama - to get things done. It's not like the American people elected Congress, did they?

[Jerryskids]

I will say, I don't like Obama standing around twiddling his thumbs and do wish he would take unilateral action on things that need doing - issuing an unconditional pardon to Snowden, rescheduling marijuana, firing half his department heads and instructing a junior AG to indict the other half just for starters.

[Pro Libertate]

Has the asshole even read the Constitution? Fucking impeach him.

[Chinny Chin Chin]

Imperial president is imperial.

In other news, dog bites man.

[Lord Humungus]

He is, after all, getting paid to twiddle his thumbs. Please, please go play some more golf.

[Bam!]

During a press conference on Wednesday, President Obama defended his aggressive use of executive power. "The American people don't want me just standing around twiddling my thumbs and waiting for Congress to get something done," Obama declared.

"The biggest problems that we're facing right now have to do with George Bush trying to bring more and more power into the executive branch and not go through Congress at all. And that's what I intend to reverse when I'm president of the United States of America." ? Senator Barack Obama, March 31, 2008

[wareagle]

reverse means accelerate, right?

[goneGalt]

reverse means accelerate, right?

Only in a demolition derby...

...Oh Wait!

[Doctor Whom]

Candidate Obama versus President Obama: Best political debate ever!

[fish]

Meh?..President Obama would just have Candidate Obama disappeared?..

I guess I'd miss candidate Obama.

PS:NEEDZMOARWEIGELFAGCHRISTTARD

[gaijin]

With Obama, it is always opposite day.

[Fist of Etiquette]

Russia has given NSA whistleblower Edward Snowden permission to stay in that country for another three years.

Putin sticking it to Obama for the rest of his term.

[Jon Lester]

I like that. I also like how Putin has assured that western farmers won't vote for any incumbents in the next year.

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

Ah, the return of food lines in Russia. I can dust off all those Soviet era jokes!

[Rich]

In Russia, food lines *you*!

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

Mr Medvedev ordered the agriculture ministry and producer organisations to find ways to boost Russian farm output in order to prevent price rises for consumers.

GOSPLAN revived!

[Tejicano]

I actually bought bread in one of the last Soviet-era bread factories in 1993 in Moscow. At the time food was scarce but at least the bread was available.

It was actually quite good - a big, round loaf of brown bread - for the equivalent of seven cents.

[Fist of Etiquette]

"The American people don't want me just standing around twiddling my thumbs and waiting for Congress to get something done," Obama declared.

The Constitution, however, insists on it.

[Hillary's Clitdong]

OLD. DEAD. WHITE. MEN.

[Adam.]

don't forget SLAVE OWNING

[Pro Libertate]

What the moron doesn't get is that the legitimacy of the government depends on playing--or at least pretending to play--by the rules. What allows him to function and to operate in reasonable safety is that most Americans think we still have a defined government, even if many don't want government particularly limited.

[toolkien]

I've busted it out before, perhaps to the point of cliche, but if politicians want to play the imperial game, they just need to keep in mind how such leaders were disposed of. The Potomac is just has handy as the Tiber...

[Lord Humungus]

Wanting Scotland to leave the UK is radical, but wanting Britain to leave the EU is bigoted. Why?

Perhaps it has to do with imagined hierarchies of power and victimhood. Scots are implausibly cast in the role of oppressed colonials. Many overseas observers assume that England must at some stage have annexed its northern neighbour ? when, if anything, the feeling in 1603 and again in 1707 was the other way around.

When it comes to Britain and the EU, however, a different hierarchy is imagined. Talk to any Brussels official about the UK's place in Europe and, sooner or later, you'll have to listen to some frightful bilge about our supposed obsession with the Empire.

[UnCivilServant]

Given that Scotch MPs get to vote on matters concerning England and English MPs don't get to vote on matters concerning Scotland, I'd say the Scots have power over the English in the way their government is set up now.

And the UK should ditch the EU like toxic waste.

[Drake]

Scotland is like Quebec - the retarded parasitic cousin the family would love to see leave town.

[Restoras]

I take exception! Scotland has given the world scotch, Adam Smith, golf and...other stuff! What has Quebec given the world, aside from goalies that speak funny English??

[Chinny Chin Chin]

Poutine and Patrick Roy.

[WTF]

Yeah, but all the Scots who were worth anything left Scotland long ago.

[Atanarjuat]

Contributions of the Scots

[Rufus J. Firefly]

There's no question Scots punched above their weight.

[Drake]

So they have been taking a break since 1700?

[Vulgar Madman]

The good ones left.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

We gave Cirque de Soleil and GSP.

[Fr?ulein Nikki]

Don't forget Hume!

[BakedPenguin]

Labatt's isn't too bad.

[Clich? Bandit]

You are dead to me BP.

[goneGalt]

Obligatory YouTube

Turn down volume if at work.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

Quebec is angling to set things up like that in Canada.

Honestly, I don't see how the UK is all that different from the rest of the continent. Maybe in their minds but in practice? The PC is worse in England, still maintain a generous welfare state similar to the continent and their economy is too tied to Europe. The Anglo-American-Commonwealth alliance is nice and all but how practical is it?

In fact, they can't isolate themselves or else they'll find themselves lagging just like centuries ago when that had to import everything from Renaissance Italy to 'catch up' from the rest of the continent.

More importantly, English soccer became a backwater with that kind of 'we don't need the EC' mentality. They were cut off from all the best players, tactics and coaching techniques and innovations.

Not defending the EU here but just offering that it's not so simple a dynamic.

[Ted S.]

I thought English soccer became a backwater because the fans rioted and got the clubs a several years' ban from UEFA competitions.

[Drake]

I thought it was because they aren't quite as poor and idle as the rest of Europe?

[Rufus J. Firefly]

If not sarcastic (never know with you!)...Happened well before that.

In the 30s, Czechoslovakia, Hungary, Austria and Italy in Europe (and Uruguay in SA) already caught up to England and surpassed them as they devised new tactics.

The English refused to partake in many international tournaments and weren't all that into club tournaments and the World Cup. By the 1950s they were already slowly falling behind.

Then countries like Argentina, Brazil, Germany, Holland and Italy kicked it up a notch with their own unique respective brands of football.

England could not compete.

Splendid isolation.

[Ted S.]

Ah, you're talking about prehistoric (ie. before the 1954 World Cup Final) football.

Seriously, though, I find that the UK is just as bad and provincial when it comes to sports as people like to make fun of the US for being. It was really irritating last summer having to deal with the people who think there's only two weeks of tennis a year going nuts because Andy Murray won Wimbledon. Gregor Dimitrov beats him this year, and there's not a peep from these people.

[Doctor Whom]

Also, the UK media, or at least those that I read, like to point out what a blessing Scottish independence would be for English taxpayers.

[toolkien]

Scots are a people, Scotch is a drink...

http://snltranscripts.jt.org/91/91escottish.phtml

[hamilton]

"The American people don't want me just standing around twiddling my thumbs and waiting for Congress to get something done," Obama declared.

There are weddings to drone, dammit! Anuses to probe. Selfies to wank over. Sodas to confiscate.

This shit doesn't do itself.

[Pro Libertate]

Not to mention, my perception of Obama is that he mostly does stand around, twiddling his thumbs. I mean, what does he even do besides blather?

[PD Scott]

Pout. A lot.

[Slammer]

Two Tulsa police officers who are married have been arrested in the fatal shooting of a 19-year-old man who was walking with their daughter, authorities said.

Lake was walking with the Keplers' 18-year-old daughter, Lisa Kepler, when Shannon Kepler confronted him, Roberson said. An argument ensued and the father lashed out, shooting Lake, Roberson said. Lisa Kepler started to run, and was shot at, but the bullet missed, Roberson said.

[sarcasmic]

If only they'd been in uniform when they shot him. Nothing else would have happened. As it is they're on paid leave while awaiting trial.

[Slammer]

Pigs and Sharia don't usually mix.

[CatoTheElder]

Just in case anybody thinks you're being sarcastic, the article reports:

The Keplers are on paid administrative leave, Roberson said.

That is seriously whacked.

[PD Scott]

Yes, but at least they'll have awkward Thanksgivings and Christmases for many, many years. And isn't that really a worse punishment?

[Ted S.]

"and was shot at"? The gun shot itself? Which of her parents tried to kill her?

[Zeb]

Lisa Kepler started to run, and was shot at

I'm often a defender of the passive voice, but this is just lazy. Shot at by whom?

[Jerryskids]

Shot at by whom?

A weapon was discharged, so I would have to guess the weapon shot at her.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

"Police Chief Chuck Jordan said in a statement that "the circumstances around this incident drives home the fact that domestic violence is a societal problem and transcends all economic groups."

""I as well as the whole department am saddened for both families involved in this tragic event,""

Domestic violence was committed, people were involved, lives were tragically lost.

I bet he issues that sort of moral-equivalence statement every time someone is arrested for murder.

[db]

Studies show that domestic violence is actually more prevalent among law enforcement officers. So this doesn't necessarily say anything about other "economic groups."

[Suthenboy]

Holy shit, he shot at his own daughter. Fry the motherfucker.

[The DerpRider]

I ready the story, but am confused. Were they out looking for her after they kicked her out of the house? Or was this some random encounter. It almost sounds premeditated which makes the cops even dumber. They could have arranged to make a stop while on duty and make it a 'good' shoot.

[Stormy Dragon]

My guess was they figured that after a week on the street she'd be begging to come back and were shocked to discover she'd manage to procure new housing all by herself.

[Fist of Etiquette]

"A new congressional report has estimated that more than 25 million Americans without health insurance will not be made to pay a penalty in 2016 due to an exploding number of ObamaCare exemptions."

The law of the land.

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

The settled law of the land!

[Hillary's Clitdong]

The Supreme-Court approved, settled law of the land!

[Lord Humungus]

Car crashes after wasp stings man on crotch

When the police finally caught up with the suspect, the man explained a wasp sting on his groin led to the accident.
Police chief Andre Skram Hansen said to NTB: "We believe the man's story. He said that he felt something on the inside of his thigh. Then he was stung and lost control of his car."

The car was seriously damaged after crashing into a boulder and the wreck had to be towed away.

Hansen said: "I don't know if the wasp has been found, but the man wasn't drunk."

[The DerpRider]

Bees! Save yourself!

[sarcasmic]

Not just a pretty face! Megan Fox beats Jimmy Fallon in a round of Pictionary... while wowing in a tight grey dress

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs.....dress.html
Sha-wing!

[kinnath]

just a lot of spackling compound and paint as far as I can tell.

[Fist of Etiquette]

The World Health Organization may declare an international public health emergency in response to the current Ebola outbreak.

Send in Brad Pitt to figure out what's going on.

[hamilton]

I'm in a meeting for the next bit so I'll post this now: Boston area Reasonoid meetup tomorrow. Email me if you want details and are not a troll stalker.

[waffles]

I don't need to stalk trolls I just use bait.

[Smilin' Joe Fission]

Wheres the Canuck Reasonoid meeting though?

[UnCivilServant]

We've booked you on the Falkland Islands. It's a bit of a swim, but should be worth it.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

There are only two of us left? I don't know where the other Canucks are.

[Smilin' Joe Fission]

I may have a Reasonoid lurker where I am. He's probably 23ish. Im 27. We will have to initiate the Canuck conclave.

[Rich]

"The American people don't want me just standing around twiddling my thumbs and waiting for Congress to get something done," Obama declared.

With all due respect, Mr. President, speak for yourself.

[Lord Humungus]

Florida man with foot fetish arrested at park after snatching socks from cheerleaders

A female juvenile leaving cheerleading practice was stopped by Mr. Van Wagner and asked for her socks, which she was holding in her hand. Mr. Van Wagner told the victim he needed her socks for a project. Mr. Van Wagner attempted to take her socks, but she was able to pull away, only to be blocked by a parked vehicle. Mr. Van Wagner began to plead with the victim in an effort to convince her to give him her socks. Mr. Van Wagner reached in and snatched the socks from her hands placing the socks in his pocket and walking away.

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

I thought it had been established that our troll was in DC?

[Restoras]

Can we start panicking about Ebola now?

[Drake]

Sure. I'll stop worry about it when the doctors take off the space suits around the patients.

[DJF]

No, Reason Mag has an article ready explaining how bringing people infected with Ebola to the USA will boost the economy since due to their short life expectancy they have nothing to lose and so will become risk taking entrepreneurs who will innovate the markets and anyone who says different are racists and statists

[Lord Peter Wimsey]

^^^Ha! Very good. The humor almost makes up for the horror of Ebola carriers entering the country.

[Zeb]

Knock yourself out. I have better things to do.

[mad.casual]

Can we start panicking about Ebola now?

Can we revisit the vaccines as a social obligation debate?

[The DerpRider]

What do millennials think?

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

NEEDZ MOAR POLLZ!

[sarcasmic]

Woman tracks down the mother who abandoned her as a baby... only to realise she has unwittingly married her BROTHER
Adriana, 39, and husband Leandro, 37, both abandoned as infants in Brazil
Couple from different towns married 7 years ago, have 6-year-old daughter
They have spent their lives searching for their mothers - both called Maria
Adriana found her mother through TV show, they were reunited on air
Maria reveals she also had a son called Leandro, Adriana breaks down
Couple vow to stay married and meet up with their mother together

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....OTHER.html

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

Telenovela to follow STAT!

[Drake]

So are the kids retarded or psychic?

[Atanarjuat]

The picture of them holding hands and kissing was a bit much.

[Zeb]

Woopsie.

This never would have happened in Plato's Republic.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

I liked this story better when it was called Oedipus Rex.

[sarcasmic]

NYPD cop who offered to fast-track female candidate's application in return for $1,000, sex and her panties is arrested after she wire-tapped him at Dunkin' Donuts
Prosecutors say Delfin Lantigua, 34, contacted the applicant on Facebook
After demands at donut shop they agreed to meet two days later at a motel
But instead of the woman, Lantigua was met by his colleagues and arrested
Officer, from Kensington, New York, charged with coercion and misconduct
'Shameful' Lantigua could face up to seven years in jail if he is convicted

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....onuts.html
Doesn't say if he's on paid leave or not.

[Brian D]

Clearly this poor hero needs additional taxpayer-funded training on how to avoid getting caught.

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

"demands at donut shop"

Good name for an album?

[WTF]

Of course they had to meet at a donut shop.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

To protect and to...mmmm, donuts! And panties!

[toolkien]

Oh, now I'm hungry for a tuna cruller...

[DontShootMe]

Now, if only he'd shot her, he'd be fine.

[Slammer]

All-female Hasidic rock band bans men from show

Good for them.

[Matrix]

Not surprising.

But I am surprised that they would legally get away with it. If someone were to pitch a fit over it, they could be sued for discrimination.

I mean, gay people can pitch a fit over a baker not wanting to make a wedding cake for a gay wedding. Why would it be okay to discriminate against men for a concert?

[WTF]

Because discriminating against men, especially white heterosexual men, is sort of encouraged these days.

[mad.casual]

Because discriminating against men, especially white heterosexual men, is sort of encouraged these days.

As a white heterosexual man, I hated white heterosexual men before it was cool to hate them.

[Atanarjuat]

Why would it be okay to discriminate against men

Your innocence is so pleasantly refreshing.

[sarcasmic]

'My ex-boyfriend killed Jim Morrison': Marianne Faithfull says The Doors rocker died after her drug-dealer ex gave him 'smack that was too strong'
Legendary lead singer was found dead in bath of Paris flat in 1971 aged 27
Mystery has long surrounded death, which was put down to 'natural causes'
Now singer Marianne Faithfull says her then-boyfriend sold him heroin
She says the drugs were 'too strong' and may have led to an overdose

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs.....trong.html
Give the guy a medal for doing a public service. Fucking Doors suck.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

Ride the snake baby

[gaijin]

Now singer Marianne Faithfull

Sounds like an attention whore with an account deficit.

[Ted S.]

Get a copy of The Girl on a Motorcycle. Not only could Faithfull not act, she could barely sit in front of rear-projection. It's so awful it's hilarious.

[Pro Libertate]

This is the end
Of sarcasmic's thread
The end.

[Lord Humungus]

(Democratic gubernatorial candidate) FitzGerald, lacking full license, apparently drove illegally after dropping off woman

Democratic gubernatorial nominee Ed FitzGerald had not had a regular Ohio driver's license for at least five years when Westlake police found him in a car with a woman early one morning two years ago.

If he drove his car home after dropping her off at her hotel, as he said he did, he would have violated Ohio law requiring those with just a temporary permit to be accompanied by a licensed driver.

[sarcasmic]

Abraham Lincoln's handwriting IS in an Illinois library book justifying racism, historians confirm
Historians confirmed Lincoln wrote on the inside cover of 'Types of Mankind' in 1861
The 1854 book, found in an Illinois public library, used 'science' to argue that different races were different species
Lincoln read the tome to better serve a legal client and didn't agree with the theories
President Lincoln, known as the Great Emancipator, ended slavery in 1863

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....-race.html
Blasphemy!

[Ted S.]

The science is settled!

[Vulgar Madman]

Only a madman would dispute science!

[gaijin]

used 'science' to argue that different races were different species

And by 'science', they mean phrenology?

[WTF]

Consensus! Who are you to dispute the experts?!

[sarcasmic]

Yeah! They're like really smart and stuff!

[Colonel Slanders]

"Lincoln read the tome to better serve a legal client and didn't agree with the theories..."

Yeah, BULLSHIT!

[sarcasmic]

Murder trial is told son 'chopped up his parents, cooked them and kept their heads in a fridge' in Hong Kong
30-year-old Chau Hoi-leung's loving parents gave him everything
But when they told him he should get a job he got angry at them
After accusing them of abandoning him he invited them for dinner
They arrived at his flat and he killed them, chopping up their bodies
He stored the heads in two fridges and cooked the bodies with rice
Chau and a friend are now on trial in Hong Kong accused of murder

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....-Kong.html

[waffles]

That's a ton of initiative for a NEET.

[Jordan]

Um, if you're gonna pull a Cartman, you have to use chili, not rice.

[Drax the Destroyer]

I'm betting the guy didn't get laid on a regular basis.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

In China, killing your parents is a massive cultural taboo that used to get you a "death by a thousand cuts" execution. Wonder what they'll do with him.

[Drax the Destroyer]

When I went to China, I saw a mob of shopkeepers dive-kick an alleged shoplifter to death (he might have lived...but things were...broken). I'm going to drink a fifth to temporarily forget about that shit. Yes, it's my breakfast. Want to fight about it?

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

I never saw any street justice, but I probably encountered half a dozen pedestrians/bicyclists that were getting shoveled up off the street. Nobody seems to react to that sort of thing there.

[Drax the Destroyer]

I'm not saying street justice is bad in and of itself, but conscripting the thief as compensation would be preferable to killing him right?

My big takeaway from China was that it's so crowded and frustrating in places that the average man on the street sees other people as obstacles/threats. To some extent, I would agree with them.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

I think they're numb to it.

[Rhywun]

Kind of like NYC.

[Mokers]

Kinslayer or Kingslayer. Which is worse?

[The Last American Hero]

Kinslayer - fuck the monarchs.

[Clich? Bandit]

Did you just start a Jordan over Martin argument? Worse as in bad or worse as in bad ass?

Lews is WAY worse (bad ass) than Jaime.

[Notorious G.K.C.]

I know about this taboo thing, but it's a bit of a taboo elsewhere, too. Maybe it's more of a sacrilege thing there.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

In historical Chinese culture, filial piety is a key tenet. To the point that cutting off your flesh to feed your parents was a practice during several eras.

[Rufus J. Firefly]

"Take me off their Obamacare will they? I'm 27 and deserve it!"

/sharpens knife.

[WTF]

After accusing them of abandoning him he invited them for dinner

It's a cookbook!!!!

[sarcasmic]

For super-size sausage, head to Germany: One in five penis enlargements worldwide take place in the country that brought us bratwurst
Of 15,414 enlargement surgeries in 2013, 2,786 took place in Germany
Venezuela came in as the second largest, with Spain a close third
Penis enlargement can increase length by six centimetres

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/fem.....usage.html
Yes, they managed to put penis and sausage into a headline.

[Rich]

"Headline"? Is that what kids call it these days?

[Jordan]

Must be a lot of gun owners in Germany.

/progderp

[Rufus J. Firefly]

German men are insecure about their pi-pi's?

I think we just got our answer as to how the Nazis could arise in such a civilized and advanced nation!

[gaijin]

One in five penis enlargements worldwide take place in the country

Wouldn;t it be easier to buy a pickup truck?

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

+1 Truck Nutz?

[Rich]

more than 25 million Americans without health insurance will not be made to pay a penalty in 2016 due to an exploding number of ObamaCare exemptions.

Alright, already.

Just give *everyone* *free* "healthcare" and be done with it. 8-(

[Palin's Buttplug]

Fake individual mandate.

[Restoras]

Hey Weigel. How's your pizza face?

[WTF]

Sure you wanna quit playing, shreek? The game's always between you and getting called a cunt. That dropped eye of yours looks like the hood on a cunt to me, shreek. When you talk, your mouth looks like a cunt moving.

[James Deen]

It would be an improvement

[sarcasmic]

Oklahoma teacher, 49, is arrested after she turned up to school on her first day 'drunk and wearing no PANTS'
School officials called Wagoner police around 9 a.m. Monday to report Lorie Ann Hill, 49, smelled of alcohol and was missing some clothing
She was discovered slumped over the desk by two teachers in an empty classroom she was claiming was her own
By the time police arrived, she was in the principal's office, and someone had managed to find a pair of shorts for her to wear
A search of her car turned up an empty cup that reportedly smelled of vodka
She escaped a DUI charge but was booked into Wagoner City Jail on suspicion of public intoxication

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....PANTS.html

[Rich]

"Dad, I got the *coolest* teacher, Miss Hill!"

[Drax the Destroyer]

If I worked at a public school I'd be pretty trashed as well, first or 4000th day.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

Jesus, don't click the link

[The DerpRider]

Wow. She is a mess. But how do you smell vodka?

[UnCivilServant]

Vodka is not odorless.

[The DerpRider]

Well, I know when you're sniffing it before taking a shot, but the article said they smelled it in the car. /shrug.

[RBS]

If it was really cheap vodka then the cup probably had a lingering "alcohol" smell.

[Drake]

1. 49 and it's her first day on the job?

2. She may have been storing the liquor in her neck for later.

[Ted S.]

It could be a new job. Just as cops who get caught get transferred to different municipalities, so do bad teachers.

[Drax the Destroyer]

1. This might become the norm if the disaster of student loans, bullshit higher education, and perpetual adolescence continues.

2. The smart option for her would have been butt chugging in the bathroom. Assuming it didn't kill her.

[Matrix]

At 49 and being a teacher, it should be her last day on the job... full pay and benefits until death for these noble souls who guide the next generation of Americans.

[Atanarjuat]

For some reason*, I always click on the link to see if the teacher is hot. Well boys, save yourselves the trouble.

*the reason is I am a perv.

[RBS]

Me too, that was quite the disappointment.

[Lord Humungus]

Nude political candidate campaigns in Times Square

San Francisco Board of Supervisors candidate George Davis stripped buck naked in Times Square on Wednesday to campaign for the right to be nude in public.

Davis spoke out against a 2013 San Francisco public nudity ban introduced by his opponent, Scott Wiener. He says nudity is a form of expression.

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

"Davis spoke out against a 2013 San Francisco public nudity ban introduced by his opponent, Scott Wiener.

This stuff just writes itself, no?

[Rhywun]

Link didn't work but googled another pic - MY EYES! Trigger warning that shit.

[sarcasmic]

Bikini-clad women rally to support mom-of-five who was 'fat-shamed' on beach because of her stretchmarks
Dozens of women of all shapes and sizes turned out Wednesday wearing their bikinis to show support for Canadian mother Tanis Jex-Blake, 33, who was openly taunted because of her stretchmarks
Jex-Blake wrote in a Facebook post that two men and a woman started 'pointing, laughing and pretending to kick me'
She was attempting to sunbathe at Alberta Beach for the first time in 13 years
She received positive comments from across the world after post was widely shared

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new.....marks.html

[Hillary's Clitdong]

Tanis Jex-Blake

With a name like that, she'll always have a backup career as a Star Trek character.

[Vulgar Madman]

Ds9, right?

[Zeb]

I guess people should wear whatever they want, and openly making fun of her was just pure assholery, but I just don't understand why so many people want to wear clothes that are just not flattering to their bodies.

[The DerpRider]

This.

[The Last American Hero]

Because peoples bodies today are more prone to be a bit, er, larger.

[Clich? Bandit]

Lest we forget that 300 years ago plump was hot.

Just LOOK at the realist paintings...I didn't know they had fast food back then.

[Zeb]

Some places plump still is hot.

[WTF]

who was openly taunted because of her stretchmarks

I'm gonna call bullshit - I have seen plenty of fatties on beaches throughout my entire life, and have never once even heard of such a thing happening.

[Jerryskids]

Alberta Beach? As in Alberta, Canada? What the hell kind of bikini would you wear to a beach in Alberta, Canada? A two-piece snowmobile suit?

[Apple]

Does anyone really believe two men and a woman started pointing, laughing and pretending to kick her?

[Rhywun]

Nope.

but I just don't understand why so many people want to wear clothes that are just not flattering to their bodies

Totally agree. But some people are just narcissistic that way.

[Lord Humungus]

Deep Water Fracking Next Frontier for Offshore Drilling

Energy companies are taking their controversial fracking operations from the land to the sea -- to deep waters off the U.S., South American and African coasts.

Cracking rocks underground to allow oil and gas to flow more freely into wells has grown into one of the most lucrative industry practices of the past century. The technique is also widely condemned as a source of groundwater contamination. The question now is how will that debate play out as the equipment moves out into the deep blue. For now, caution from all sides is the operative word.

"It's the most challenging, harshest environment that we'll be working in," said Ron Dusterhoft, an engineer at Halliburton Co., the world's largest fracker. "You just can't afford hiccups."

[Brian D]

But that will pollute undersea groundwater!

~enviroderp

[Vulgar Madman]

There is water at the bottom of the ocean!

[WTF]

OMERGERD!! They might release all the heat that's been SEQUESTERED IN THE DEEP OCEAN!!11!!

[Aloysious]

Top Khmer Rouge leaders guilty of crimes against humanity

Two top Khmer Rouge leaders have been jailed for life after being convicted by Cambodia's UN-backed tribunal of crimes against humanity.

Nuon Chea, 88, served as leader Pol Pot's deputy and Khieu Samphan, 83, was the Maoist regime's head of state.

...snip

The regime sought to create an agrarian society: cities were emptied and their residents forced to work on rural co-operatives. Many were worked to death while others starved as the economy imploded.

During four violent years, the Khmer Rouge also killed all those it perceived as enemies - intellectuals, minorities, former officials - and their families.

Cambodian progressives. How cute.

[UnCivilServant]

Worse, it got so bad that the Vietnamese communists ended up invading and put a stop to it.

[Jordan]

Noam Chomsky has a sad.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

The Nation article by Chomsky for all to read.

Chomsky's complaint was that he thought more blame should be laid at the feet of the USA. So much so that he was willing to ignore what the Khmer Rouge were doing. Typical racist and patronizing prog bullshit.

If, indeed, postwar Cambodia is, as he believes, similar to Nazi Germany, then his comment is perhaps just, though we may add that he has produced no evidence to support this judgement. But if postwar Cambodia is more similar to France after liberation, where many thousands of people were massacred within a few months under far less rigorous conditions than those left by the American war, then perhaps a rather different judgement is in order. That the latter conclusion may be more nearly correct is suggested by the analyses mentioned earlier.

[Pro Libertate]

Kind of late in the day, isn't it? Why so long?

[Aloysious]

What I got from the article was the wheels of justice moved very slowly indeed.

[Pro Libertate]

Very slowly. These guys are ancient.

[Lord Humungus]

An Iowa Farmer's Response to Chuck Norris

Chuck Norris doesn't write columns. He stares at words until they arrange themselves into sentences.

That's a "Chuck Norris Fact"?one you haven't heard before because I just made it up. But perhaps you're familiar with the style of joke: a satirical, exaggerated claim about the supposedly superhuman powers of actor and martial artist Chuck Norris. Entire books and websites are dedicated to this sub-genre of humor.

Unfortunately, there was nothing funny about Norris's recent online column. It was a fact-free rant about modern agriculture. Norris warned his readers that the genetically modified food they eat everyday?the kind that I grow on my farm here in Iowa?is "killing you softly."

[carol]

Both of my kids are into this GMO crap. Worse, my eleven year old granddaughter recently gave a lecture on the subject. I asked when she and her mother were going to plant a garden and start raising their own animals for slaughter but it doesn't appear that they'll be doing that anytime soon.

[WTF]

Unless they're foraging in the woods, every fucking thing they eat is genetically modified.

[Ted S.]

Italian professor brings in guest lecturer to talk about crisis management.

That lecturer is the captain of the Costa Concordia

For the terrified passengers of the Costa Concordia who had to inch down the upturned hull of the cruise ship after it ran aground on the island of Giglio, Capt Francesco Schettino may not exactly have struck them as the epitome of calm and composure.

But the former cruise ship commander, who is on trial for multiple manslaughter and for abandoning the ship hours before the evacuation was complete, has been dispensing his wisdom on how to handle "situations of panic and crisis" to students at a distinguished Italian university.

Schettino, who infamously claimed that he did not deliberately abandon the ship but instead "accidentally tripped" into a lifeboat that took him ashore, delivered a lecture to postgraduate students at Rome's La Sapienza University on July 5.

It would take a heart of stone not to laugh at the absurdity of this.

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

"Everything I did....do the opposite!"

[Rich]

"Or, at least DON'T GET CAUGHT!"

[Ted S.]

"If I were a cop I'd be on paid leave!"

[WTF]

You gotta love the Italians.

[Lord Humungus]

Coke, Pepsi try to fatten bottom line with smaller servings

The mini-can is the latest move by food and beverage companies to boost their product offerings of smaller portion sizes that supposedly help consumers limit their caloric intake - even if there are signs that some end up reaching for another package or can.

Mini can sales grew 3 percent in 2013 while the rest of the carbonated soft drink category dropped, according to market research firm Euromonitor International.

Coca-Cola (KO.N) and Pepsi (PEP.N) said the cans were one of the few bright spots in U.S. soda sales in their second quarter earnings calls last month.

[Drax the Destroyer]

I love Coke (especially a Mexican Coke), but the shit is poison. I try to treat it like cigars and try to have it only once a month. Maybe more people, post-diabetes apocalypse are catching on.

Booze, on the other hand, is the nectar of the gods and should be consumed hourly.

[The DerpRider]

Yeah. I gave up soda a few years ago, but every once in a while I'll take a tug on a regular Coke.

[Ted S.]

But there's no inflation, no sirree.

The DeBlasios of the world are going to have a shitfit because even though the cans are smaller, the money is going to the company and not the state.

[Rich]

Pistorius told 'snowball of lies,' says prosecution

The Pistorius trial is *still* going on?

Sheesh, this thing is lasting longer than the Stanley Cup playoffs!

*** mightily ducks ***

[Restoras]

I see what you did there...

[wareagle]

king him

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

*Drops gloves, gives semi-toothless grin*

[toolkien]

This shouldn't be taking so long, he doesn't have a leg to stand on...

Hold the applause, just throw money...

[entropy_factor]

OT: 3 more weeks until my favorite season- drunken tailgating in 100 degree temps season.

[Brett L]

I learned to do that in Austin, I do it in Tallahassee since 2004. I'm interested to see what Coach Strong brings to the team.

[Clich? Bandit]

Yeah since we didnt have a superbowl last year (that was weird how they canceled it) I am really excited about the Donkys line up...I do think Champ was a mistake though.

[Lord Humungus]

Billionaire confident on future 278-km canal

With a planned capacity to accommodate ships with loaded displacement of 400,000 tons, the proposed 278-kilometer-long canal that will run across the Nicaragua isthmus would probably change the landscape of the world's maritime trade, Wang, the billionaire behind the project, told the Global Times.

"The project is the largest infrastructure project ever in the history of man in terms of engineering difficulty, investment scale, workload and its global impact," Wang, chairman and CEO of the HK Nicaragua Canal Development Investment Co (HKND Group), told Global Times reporters in an exclusive interview on Thursday.

The Nicaragua Canal, which is about four times the length of the Panama Canal, will connect the Atlantic Ocean and the Pacific Ocean upon its completion. The project is estimated to cost $50 billion.

[waffles]

Wasn't there just a huge project to expand and update the Panama Canal. I'm not going to argue.

More Canals = More JOBS!

[Bam!]

I'll be happy to sail down it, right after I take a trip on a Hyperloop.

[Clich? Bandit]

the guys on Deadliest Catch were talking about how the owner of one of the boats got a gun to cross the canal. Simple shotgun though, I would take my whole arsenal.

[UnCivilServant]

Actually Nicaragua was the planned location for the original canal because of it's topography and geography, which would have made it simple to dig in 1900. It landed on Panama because of politics. The terrain there is actually atrocious for canal digging despite the shorter distances.

[Zeb]

The geography there is weird. Lake Nicaragua, which is very close to the Pacific, drains to the Caribbean, and is only like 100' above sea level.

[robc]

Panama geography is weird too. When going thru canal from Atlantic to Pacific, you are traveling east.

[robc]

See below, they tried Nicaragua but everyone died of Malaria.

[robc]

The Nicaraguan Canal was tried before. I guess we have Malaria figured out now.

[Lord Humungus]

Snowden receives three-year Russian residence permit: lawyer

Former U.S. intelligence contractor Edward Snowden, wanted by the United States for leaking extensive secrets of its electronic surveillance programs, has been given a three-year residence permit by Russia, his Russian lawyer told reporters on Thursday.

The announcement comes at a time when Russia's relations with the West are at Cold War-era lows over Russia's actions in Ukraine. Russia responded to Western sanctions by banning certain food imports from the United States, the European Union, Australia, Canada and Norway on Thursday.

[Drax the Destroyer]

Lucky bastard is going to be hip-deep in Russian ladies. Too bad he can't give them what they want: American citizenship.

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

+1 ad on the side of the page

[The Last American Hero]

yet.

[Certified Public Asskicker]

Mark Cuban to politicize banana purchases:

@mcuban Goodbye SaraLee and Chiquita Bananas.You don't want to pay USA income taxes.Now every one of your USA CUSTOMERS Pays more#notgoodbiz

? Mark Cuban (@mcuban) August 6, 2014

[removed][removed]

[UnCivilServant]

Mister Cuban doesn't get how economics works. A company that lowers its overhead doesn't raise its prices.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

Cuban got rich because Yahoo was flush with cash and stupid. I'm not convinced of his business acumen.

[Certified Public Asskicker]

He is like Buffet, I think, in that he probably does have business smarts, but to appeal to the masses, he says stupid shit that sounds good to them.

[Jordan]

I think he's referring to taxes, not prices. We all know that cutting government spending is not an option, so anyone who tries to pay less in taxes is imposing on others or something. Not giving is taking and so forth.

[UnCivilServant]

Fuck you, cut spending.

[Palin's Buttplug]

Cuban is a big Ayn Rand fan - so he says anyway. Patriotism before markets for him.

[Certified Public Asskicker]

He is from Pittsburgh but lives in Dallas.

I say he is a hypocrite.

[Hillary's Clitdong]

"big Ayn Rand fan" - "Patriotism before markets"

System Error

[Jordan]

It's programming still hasn't been perfected.

[James Deen]

Just because he's a billionaire doesn't mean he's not a clown. (His politics are all over the place and in an "incoherent" way not in the "nonpartisan genius" way)

[Ted S.]

Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel.

[Lord Peter Wimsey]

"Cuban is a big Ayn Rand fan "

Makes no sense in light of his banana comments, but whatever.

[Chinny Chin Chin]

From Rand, Cuban said he learned "you have to depend on yourself first and last. That it doesn't matter what other people think about you, it's how you feel about yourself that matters."

Hmm, not so much about objectivism, small government or liberty.

[Ted S.]

Why would anybody want to pay tax?

[WTF]

Patriotism! Why do you want the terrorists to win?

[Aloysious]

In archaeology news:

Hambledon Hill fort in Dorset acquired by National Trust for ?450,000

Built more than 2,000 years ago, Hambledon Hill, near Blandford Forum in Dorset, rises to 190m (620ft).

[Lord Humungus]

White House Blindsided By Israeli-Egyptian Relationship

Egypt's new government under President Abdel Fattah al-Sisi actually comes out of this round faring better than anyone else ? in part, because it was only semi-invested. The Egyptians had no illusions about this conflict. They wanted to cut Hamas down to size, keep the Qataris and the Turks out of the equation, and marginalize U.S. Secretary of State John Kerry, too, for that matter. Indeed, it was Egypt that produced what appears to be the successful cease-fire. And Cairo is now the venue for the follow-on negotiations at a longer-term agreement. Egypt once again demonstrated its centrality in Arab-Israeli politics by maintaining good ties with Netanyahu and the PA. Even Hamas understands that it needs Cairo's assistance to maintain control of Gaza.

[Palin's Buttplug]

US business booming:

The government's employment report last week showed companies in the U.S. added more than 200,000 jobs for a sixth straight month in July, the longest such period since 1997. U.S. gross domestic product expanded at a 4 percent annual pace in the second quarter, confirming the Fed's view that a first-quarter contraction was transitory.

News Corp. and CBS Corp. are among 17 S&P 500 members that report their financial results today, according to data compiled by Bloomberg. About 75 percent of companies to have posted earnings this season beat analysts' estimates for profit, while 65 percent exceeded sales projections.

Profit probably rose 9.4 percent in the second quarter, while sales gained 4.2 percent, according to analyst estimates compiled by Bloomberg.

Bloomberg

[wareagle]

in spite of the administration's best efforts, those damn businesses refuse to die.

[Rich]

"We didn't kill that!"

[Restoras]

the unemployment rate for adult women increased to 5.7 percent and the rate for blacks edged up to 11.4 percent in July...The rates for adult men (5.7 percent), teenagers (20.2
percent), whites (5.3 percent), and Hispanics (7.8 percent) showed little or no change in July...The jobless rate for Asians was 4.5 percent...The number of long-term unemployed (those jobless for 27 weeks or more) was essentially unchanged at 3.2 million...The civilian labor force participation rate, at 62.9 percent, changed little in July. The
participation rate has been essentially unchanged since April.

Yep, boom times indeed.

http://www.bls.gov/news.release/empsit.nr0.htm

[Hillary's Clitdong]

Hey, everybody switching to part-time employment will CREATE MORE JERBS.

[Jordan]

Hey, but the junk bond and equity bubbles are in full swing! RECOVERY SUMMER!!1

[Restoras]

It's tragically ironic that two groups that turned out big for Obama are suffering the most.

[Lord Peter Wimsey]

By tragically ironic you mean "sweet," right?

[Restoras]

In this instance, I'm trying to avoid schadenfreude. People are hurting, the economy is stagnant and not providing any opportunity, and the idiots in all four branches of government don't give a shit.

[Palin's Buttplug]

Yeah, Romney had binders full of women too. What did that pay?

You really don't think a white GOPer has ideas on job creation, do you? Bush's tax cuts did not create a single job.

You can't be that ignorant.

[Jordan]

https://yourlogicalfallacyis.com/tu-quoque

He didn't say shit about the GOP.

[Rhywun]

Cool site - I am bookmarking that for reference

[Restoras]

Irrelevant.

You are running around screaming "ermagerd boomtimes!! dah wingnutz is stoopid and erma so smert!!!"

The FACTS show that women and minorities, two groups you progtards claim to be fighting for, are not participating in your "recovery".

So what do you do when faced with inconvenient facts? Scream Boooosch!

Pathetic. Go back to your ProActiv regimen.

[Palin's Buttplug]

Women and minorities are not my concern, dumbass.

I care that markets function properly.

[Restoras]

Right. That's why you love Obamacare - because it will let the market for healthcare services function properly.

[Vulgar Madman]

Thank god we have you for that!

[CatoTheElder]

So the GM bailout, the bank bailouts, the Fed's QE escapades, and Jon Corzine walking about free as a bird and guilty as sin are what you call properly functioning markets?

[Drake]

Tax cuts and deregulation don't create jobs.

The free market does.

[Drake]

Let me guess, of the jobs added, 400,000 were part-time, -200,000 were full-time?

[Restoras]

Also, this...

About 75 percent of companies to have posted earnings this season beat analysts' estimates for profit, while 65 percent exceeded sales projections

...doesn't mean jack. All it means is that the companies issued guidance that was easy to beat, and since the herd of analysts on Wall Street never deviate from it - voila! - ermagerd it's boom times!

Honestly Weigel, do you even bother to dig into anything at all? Do you have any contacts outside of your Journolist buddies that you can leverage to actually do some thinking outside the Beltway? Did you bother to check if analysts estimates were outside of the guidance that the companies provided - or did you just see a yummy headline and say "Aha! More proof that I'm right and so much smarter than everyone else! And it's on Bloomberg so it must be true!!"

It's unbelievable how lame and pathetic you are - but by all means, keep it up.

[Palin's Buttplug]

You can't read for shit. 75% beat "analysts estimates", not guidance. Everyone knows companies sandbag.

[WTF]

What you've just said... is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever seen. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having seen it. I award you no points, and may God have mercy on your soul...

[The Last American Hero]

Remember, for PB Stock Market equals economy. So in 1929, or 1989, the economy was rock solid. Until it wasn't.

[Restoras]

Beautiful. You admit that company's sandbag but still think that's an indication of boom times!

Analyst estimates are derived from company guidance. Every conference call to discuss earnings includes the company's guidance for the current quarter, and it is that guidance that analysts use to generate their "estimates" - so company's conveniently give guidance for a quarter that they are usually 1/3 of the way through already and AS YOU ADMIT they sandbag it, all to drive the stock higher.

Do you even have a clue why analysts don't deviate from company guidance? Do you have any contacts inside Wall Street to help you understand how it, you know, actually works? Or do you just read Bloomberg and think you know how Wall Street works? Can you really be that naive?

[Palin's Buttplug]

You're an idiot. I have helped massage the quarterly numbers of public companies. We have argued on whether or not contracts met the FASB definition of a lease, sale, or loan many times.

Earnings can be deceptive. Analysts are the ones that discover sham companies like Herbalife (TBD).

[Restoras]

Exactly! But still boomtimes, eh?

[Vulgar Madman]

What you really mean is you work at a massage parlor.

[Drake]

Lots of companies (including the one I work for) have low-balled the expectations, then met profit targets by slashing costs. Actual revenue growth adjusted for inflation is very elusive these days.

[Restoras]

Yeah, but boomtimez!

[Drake]

Booming so much we aren't back-filling positions of people who leave, laying off anyone we can, restricting travel, hiring part-timers when we really need a body, and generally trying to cut our way to a good Q3.

[Jerryskids]

The government's employment report last week showed companies in the U.S. added more than 200,000 jobs for a sixth straight month in July...

And absolutely nobody expects that number to be revised downward in a few weeks, either.

[MegaloMonocle]

Are we back up to the number of jobs we had before the recession?

How many more jobs would we need to add to employ all the employment-age people added to our population since the recession?

Unless and until employment has completely recovered, don't talk to me about "booming" business.

[Jordan]

Obama's monsters ball: How the White House opened its doors to some of Africa's most evil dictators and homophobes and turned blind eye to their human rights record

President Barack Obama drew a diplomatic line at the first ever U.S-Africa summit at the White House this week by not inviting Zimbabwe's brutal dictator Robert Mugabe.

But the guest list still included several other African leaders with only slightly better human rights records.

The White House promoted the summit as the largest-ever gathering of African leaders in the United States, with more than 50 countries represented.

The red carpet was rolled out for Equatorial Guinea's Teodoro Obiang Nguema Mbasogo, who shot or jailed virtually all his political opponents, Gambia's Yahya Jammeh, who threatened to 'cut off the head' of any homosexuals in the country and for Cameroon's Paul Biya, who has the dubious honor of ranking 19th on author David Wallechinsky's 2006 list of the world's 20 worst living dictators.

[Free Society]

It's a morally deficient continent. You can't throw a rock without hitting a homophobe, a rapist or a slaver. Any gathering of African leaders is necessarily a gathering of evil, stupid dictators.

[WTF]

I'm pretty sure pointing that out is racist.

[Idle Hands]

Stupid is a little harsh, after all they all got educated here and learned from the best minds central planning can offer.

[Lord Humungus]

We now spend more time in front of a screen than in bed, Ofcom study shows

Britons now spend more time watching TV, using their mobile and on the computer than they do sleeping, according to new research.

The study, by communications regulator Ofcom, found that the average UK adult uses technology for eight hours and 41 minutes a day, 20 minutes longer than they spend in bed.

The research also found - perhaps worryingly - that six-year-olds have the same understanding of using gadgets such as tablets and mobile phones as 45-year olds, whilst people were reaching their peak understanding of digital technology at the age of 14 to 15.

[Drax the Destroyer]

Pasty white people becoming even more pasty white? Cry me a river.

[Ska]

I probably spend 14 waking hours in front of a screen, 4 not, 6 sleeping. It's not even close.

[Rhywun]

Same numbers here. What am I supposed to be shitting my pants about? I sure would like more sleep but that's not the fault of Big Tech.

[Certified Public Asskicker]

Charles Koch Hijacks Martin Luther King Jr. To Pitch His Vision For Low-Wage America

Koch quotes Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. "If a man is called to be a street sweeper," King said, "he should sweep streets so well that all the hosts of heaven and earth will pause to say, 'Here lived a great street sweeper who did his job well.'"

But taking pride in one's work does not prevent a person from seeking fair wages or safe working conditions or equal opportunity. Near the end of his life, King helped organize the Poor People's Campaign to demand, among other things, greater government effort to fight poverty.

King is also unlikely to have approved of the millions the Koch brothers have poured into funding voter ID initiatives nationwide -- initiatives known to disproportionately undermine the ability of minorities to vote.

Plus something about racism.

[Atanarjuat]

I wonder what Dr. King would have thought about the Kochs giving vast sums for black kids to go to college.

But taking pride in one's work does not prevent a person from seeking fair wages or safe working conditions or equal opportunity.

I refuse to click on that stupid article, but the above seems to be a classic non-sequitur.

[Illocust]

King was a socialist. He wanted special treatment for blacks in both housing and college. He specifically stated he thought we should model our system on how India was treating its untouchables at the time.

[Free Society]

The American people don't want me just standing around twiddling my thumbs and waiting for Congress to get something done,"

Yes we want you to do anything, anything at all. Which includes assuming dictatorial powers of course. We need you to be spying on us around the clock, fingerbanging us when we travel, chase us out of foreign markets and generally just obstruct our lives with varying degrees of injustice.

[Ted S.]

Would you like to see him commit seppuku?

[Mainer2]

During a press conference on Wednesday, President Obama defended his aggressive use of executive power. "The American people don't want me just standing around twiddling my thumbs and waiting for Congress to get something done," Obama declared

Spoken like a whiny teenager.

[The Late P Brooks]

Any gathering of African leaders is necessarily a gathering of evil, stupid dictators.

Give them more money. That will straighten them out.

[Lord Humungus]

Manatee County woman scares burglar off with gun

She yelled out warnings to whoever was downstairs.

"I didn't want to shoot. I really didn't want to have to shoot anybody," she said.

She then called for help.

"When I called 911 she kept saying put the gun down. Put the gun down and I said I'll put the gun down when I see the police," NJ said.

[Mainer2]

While her mind isn't completely at ease, she sleeps better knowing her protection is just a drawer away.

"I worry very much about somebody breaking in again."

But she has no plans to get rid of her weapon.

?? But ? Why would she even consider getting rid of her gun ? Is the gun the totem that caused the break in ? That sentence just seems...odd.

[Zeb]

Maybe the 911 lady just didn't want her to get shot by the cops when they showed up?

[Steve G]

This. I made the same remark last night when there was shock at the 911 operator's guidance. Seems pretty pragmatic to me

[RishJoMo]

Sometimes man you jsut have to roll with it.

http://www.AnonGalaxy.tk

[Jordan]

Trigger warning: Gawker

Man Buys Every Pie at Local Burger King to Spite Shitty Little Brat

Kids are annoying no matter how you slice it, but if they are crying their heads off and yelling "I want fucking pie!" when you're in line at a Burger King, the only natural recourse is to then buy every single pie in sight so that the kid just has to fucking deal. One man, a Gawker hero, claims on Reddit to have done just that.

[Ted S.]

LOL

[Andrew S.]

I saw it on Reddit. And then I saw it on /r/thathappened, because it is a thing that totally happened.

Here's what really happened: The kid was whining, the guy grumbled a bit, bought his burgers, went home, came up with a snarky comeback hours later, and posted on Reddit for karma.

[waffles]

Cynic.

[Jordan]

The Reddit detective brigade amuses me. Who cares if it's fake or a repost? I'll never understand why people get so pissed about fake internet points on Reddit.

[Scruffy Nerfherder]

When it's all you have, you tend to be protective of it.

[Apple]

Is he pissed or just pointing out the obvious?

[The Late P Brooks]

You really don't think a white GOPer has ideas on job creation, do you? Bush's tax cuts did not create a single job.

I don't know about that. It seems as if a whole flock of political consultants and pundits have made carers out of whining impotently about the BOOOOOOOOOOSH tax cuts.

[WTF]

Millions of jobs created or saved. Isn't that the new, unfalsifiable metric?

[robc]

Its almost got to be factually untrue. I bet we can find one small business owner who used the money from the tax cut to expand their business and hire someone.

[Ted S.]

Baskin Robbins' 32d flaovr?

Breast Milk Ice Cream Available in Iceland

Gu?r?n revealed that the idea for the new ice cream came after a prank call from a local radio station with the radio host offering Gu?r?n her breast milk to make ice cream. Later, when Gu?r?n realized that the call had been a joke, she told the radio hosts that they shouldn't have gotten her so worked up as she had gone to work on the project immediately.

In the interview with visir.is, Gu?r?n stressed that it was completely optional to taste the ice cream and that no one should feel forced to do so. She did point out, though, that the milk is pasteurized and produced under existing regulations.

Hverager?i's Ice Cream Day takes place from 1to 4 pm on August 16. Other experimental flavors include cottage cheese and har?fiskur (dried fish).

Can artisanal mayonnaise-flavored ice cream be far behind?

[Zeb]

Can you even have mayonnaise flavored things that aren't mayonnaise?

[Jordan]

Even mayonnaise-flavored mayonnaise makes me want to vomit.

[Zeb]

Good for you. Why do people who don't like mayonnaise always feel the need to tell everyone about it?

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

They are summoning sloopy?

[Bobarian]

You have to say it 3 times in the mirror.

[Rhywun]

Why do people who don't like __________ always feel the need to tell everyone about it?

deep-dish
circumcision
NYC

The list is endless...

[The DerpRider]

You want to cut down trees on your own property? Ha. You're going to pay a permit, get a licensed contractor, and donate to the city "Tree Fund" $40-$80 per inch of diameter for that tree...

[Cdr Lytton]

I was sure this was going to be Portland until the part where you actually get to cut down the tree.

[The DerpRider]

Former Lion, Scott Mitchell, now a svelte 366 lbs will appear on the next Biggest Loser. I'm assuming for the weight, but maybe for the crappy football.

[robc]

This isnt unusual. Football players struggle with weight when they arent exercising like crazy after their careers. They have to eat a lot when young and growing and with a high metabolism.

Then they balloon up afterwords.

[Sevo]

Well, they ain't the 'young and healthy' cohort:

"AIDS patients fear discrimination in ACA exchange"
[...]
"But advocacy groups allege insurance companies are discouraging HIV and AIDS patients, who are expensive to cover, by requiring them to pay a percentage of costly medications instead of a flat co-pay, essentially pricing the medications out of reach."
http://www.sfgate.com/health/a.....673246.php

Hey, it's supposed to be FREE!

[Notorious G.K.C.]

Richard III to get a proper church burial.

"This service will form part of a seven-day programme of events in Leicester and Leicestershire, centred on Richard III. On Sunday 22nd March the University of Leicester ? whose team discovered King Richard III and formally identified him after extensive research ? will transfer the mortal remains into a lead-lined coffin, and will travel from Leicester to Bosworth, remembering the life the King lost and his journey in 1485. Villages related to Richard III's last days will be included, remembering key moments of King Richard's last days."

http://www.medievalists.net/20.....arch-26th/

[Cdr Lytton]

Can we get Rowan Atkinson to do the eulogy?

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

+1 Blackadder

[Winded]

Chicago suburb gets hit with a RICO suit by pizzeria owner fighting off eminent domain taking, pays out $6.5 million. Not sure where sympathies should lie since there's no word if he's serving deep dish.

http://www.dailyherald.com/art.....140809172/

[Jordan]

Holy shit, that's awesome. Hopefully we see more of this.

[Restoras]

Yes, that is a lot of awesome, plus I bet the local mob will be happy - it's a cash biznizz...

[The Late P Brooks]

I wonder if our little pal Shreeek has ever considered shining his 10 watt intellectul spotlight on the phenomenon of Presidential expectations managemnt.

"I'm an excellent President. I'm really not an incompetent, ineffectual buffoon. It's just those mean old Rethuglitards who never let me do cool stuff! If it wasn't for them, this nation would be a PARADISE by now."

[Restoras]

What fer? Dah data iz shooing Boomtimez!!

[Jerryskids]

Is anybody paying attention to the fact that Hawaii is being hit by a hurricane, the first in 22 years, proving once again that climate change is real?

[Swiss Servator, spare a franc?]

If the Kona coffee harvest gets hurt, I might be curled up in a ball, weeping, on the floor.

[Bobarian]

"proving once again that climate change is real?"

I hope this is facetious, because weather does not mean climate and 22 years is nothing on the time scales of recognizing any real climate changes.

[OldMexican]

"A new congressional report has estimated that more than 25 million Americans without health insurance will not be made to pay a penalty in 2016 due to an exploding number of ObamaCare exemptions."

The Devil is in the details exceptions.