The first person to cross the finish line at the Boston Marathon is Meb Keflezighi, an American immigrant from Eritrea. He's the first American citizen to win since 1983.
- Presumably coming down from a 4/20 buzz, Attorney General Eric Holder announced that the Justice Department is setting more lenient guidelines for drug offenders and anticipates "receiv[ing] thousands of additional applications for clemency."
- Ukrainian officials claim that they possess photographic proof that the militant separatists in the east are undercover Russian troops.
- The Boy Scouts of America revoked one Seattle troop's charter after finding out that their leader is gay.
- America's hobbling economy is forcing more people to live with their parents, but it's not just those recent college debt slaves: the number of middle-aged people moving back home is surging.
- First Lady Michelle Obama today waxed philosophical on food. She questioned, "How would you appreciate vegetables if you never had chocolate?" Her wisdom is that "splurging is the key to life."