Friday Funnies: Obamacare and Jobs

Henry Payne | 2.14.2014 7:00 AM

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Fist of Etiquette 11 years ago

That's what Costas gets for trying the downhill with that pinkeye.
1. Brian 11 years ago
  
  Sounds like he took too many showers in Sochi.
invisible furry hand 11 years ago

Lingam worship?
1. Pompey 11 years ago
  
  Dendrolatry taken to its sexiest, rapiest, most logical extreme. Dentradultry?
Pompey 11 years ago

I don't know what he expected using crooked tree branches instead of ski poles. Amateur.

Also, what happened to the good old days when young couples would carve "MF ? BF" into trees. Now even carved tree messages gotta be political. Simple times are gone!
1. UnCivilServant 11 years ago
  
  That's no tree.
  1. Pompey 11 years ago
    
    MMMMMMAN, that guy really did a number on that ski lift column. You gotta think that kind of kinetic energy would have made pulp out of his watermelon head. I guess it is also possible that quality inspection was shoddy. ... we are talking about Sochi here after all.
    1. UnCivilServant 11 years ago
      
      I wouldn't be surprised if it were made from tinfoil.
  2. sage 11 years ago
    
    Of course not. It's clearly labeled "Obamacare".
    
    Christ even with labels people don't know what this shit is?
UnCivilServant 11 years ago

You mean Our president is so anti-american he fires steel poles at the sochi slopes whenever one of our athletes is competing?
Jerry on the boat 11 years ago

Still a better skier than Bode Miller I guess...
/ducks
1. Pompey 11 years ago
  
  Little known fact, he was named after the Bode plot. Not the inventor. The plot itself.
Another David 11 years ago

Was it really necessary to put the "Media" namebadge on the guy holding a microphone and talking to the camera?
1. Pompey 11 years ago
  
  Where is the camera? Who sent you??
2. Doctor Whom 11 years ago
  
  You mean to suggest that something should have been unlabeled? How could you?
3. invisible furry hand 11 years ago
  
  Never mind that, where are the labels on the white thing on the left and black sticks on the right?
  1. SweatingGin 11 years ago
    
    "Senate Democrats!"
    
    "House Republicans!"
4. Ted S. 11 years ago
  
  This is Henry Payne. The answre is "Yes".
5. gaijin 11 years ago
  
  the guy holding a microphone
  Microphone you say? I thought that was a corndog, well done.
  1. invisible furry hand 11 years ago
    
    Know that when you hold a corndog, the corndog also holds you
    1. gaijin 11 years ago
      
      +1 Soviet Corn Dog
  2. CampingInYourPark 11 years ago
    
    I thought he pinged the ski dude in the nose with a poison dart
    1. gaijin 11 years ago
      
      aha! That would explain the magic wand coming out of his nose.
  3. Rich 11 years ago
    
    Microphone you say? I thought that was a corndog
    
    I thought it was a wooden mallet.
    1. gaijin 11 years ago
      
      ^excellent!
CampingInYourPark 11 years ago

Idiots worry about snow in sub-tropical Sochi, Russia

I'm not an environmental science major, I'm not a scientist, in fact I didn't even go to college, but just like most Americans, I know that as the snow dwindles so does our water supply, our food, our health and our economy and unless our governments can stop letting politics get in the way of common sense we're all in for some more sobering and painful environmental changes that will truly change the face of this planet. It's time to truly urge the leaders of this world to take action.

http://protectourwinters.org/n.....I56GU.dpuf
1. invisible furry hand 11 years ago
  
  unless our governments can stop letting politics get in the way of common sense
  
  There is so much confusion about politics, policy, and even the nature of common sense in this quote that i don't quite know where to begin.
2. gaijin 11 years ago
  
  I'm not an environmental science major, I'm not a scientist, in fact I didn't even go to college,but
  
  Translation: I don't know anything about anything but I will now tell you what I know to be true.
  1. sarcasmic 11 years ago
    
    It feels true so it must be true.
3. WTF 11 years ago
  
  As the snow DWINDLES!? What alternate universe does this idiot live in? 49 out of 50 states in the US have snow on the ground, and we just got another 14 inches here in the northeast. Fucking moron.
  1. UnCivilServant 11 years ago
    
    Quick - we need to fly some of our surplus to the 50th. We need to unlock the achievement "winter wonderland"
    1. SweatingGin 11 years ago
      
      Spoken like a true central planner!
      
      Pfft. If there was a demand for winter wonderland there, the free market would take care of it.
      1. UnCivilServant 11 years ago
        
        *sniffles* I didn't want to keep them all wintery, just long enough to unlock the achievement.
      2. Floridian 11 years ago
        
        Actually at the Gaylord palms they do an ice show every year, so yes, the free market provided me with said winter wonderland.
      3. mad libertarian guy 11 years ago
        
        The market hath already spoken on this matter.
  2. Ted S. 11 years ago
    
    Doesn't it dwindle every year about March or so?
    1. gimmeasammich 11 years ago
      
      "An astronaut moved into our neighborhood, and simultaneously all the leaves fell off our oak trees!"
  3. sarcasmic 11 years ago
    
    The New York Times says it's The End of Snow.
    1. UnCivilServant 11 years ago
      
      Is that like "the war to end all wars"?
    2. gaijin 11 years ago
      
      haha! And on NPR this morning they follow 60 seconds of Snowmageddon coverage with a 60 second story on how hot it might be in Phoenix this weekend. See, global warming is out there, just waiting to get us...if we know where to look!
4. CampingInYourPark 11 years ago
  
  I know that as the snow dwindles so does our water supply, our food, our health and our economy
  
  Compared to:
  
  Reports from official government agencies, private surveys and U.S. corporations have blamed colder-than-normal weather and heavy snowfall across large swaths of the country for everything from slack retail sales and weak employment data to poor industrial output.
  
  http://finance.yahoo.com/news/.....ector.html
  
  Ermagod! The snowz are controlling everything!
  1. Swiss Servator, Befehl! 11 years ago
    
    WHO LET DARTH CHENEY AT THE KOCH BROTHERS WEATHER MACHINE AGAIN?!
  2. mad libertarian guy 11 years ago
    
    Not to mention he's wrong.
    
    The news media are flush with stories this week claiming global warming is crushing global crop production. According to the media, global warming is putting the hurt on two of our favorite indulgences ? coffee and beer. For the more globally conscious (or less caffeinated/less inebriated) among us, the media are also focusing attention on an alleged African corn crisis. A look at facts rather than alarmist speculation, however, shows global warming is strongly benefiting nearly all global crops, including coffee, beer barley, and African corn.
    
    Without a doubt, global warming is affecting global crop production. The tremendous improvement in global crop production and worldwide growing conditions during recent decades is one of the most important yet least reported news events of our time. As the earth continues to recover from the abnormally cold conditions of the centuries-long Little Ice Age, warmer temperatures, improving soil moisture, and more abundant atmospheric carbon dioxide have helped bring about a golden age for global agricultural production.
    
    Global warming is helping to produce more food worldwide. OH NOEZ!!!
Ted S. 11 years ago

and unless our governments can stop letting politics get in the way of common sense we're all in for some more sobering and painful environmental changes that will truly change the face of this planet.

I agree. Trying to keep GMOs banned could lead to mass starvations in sub-Saharan Africa.
1. WTF 11 years ago
  
  Hey, as long as the proglodytes can feel good about themselves, what does it matter if a few million brown people starve?
  1. UnCivilServant 11 years ago
    
    It does to the people who are starving.
    1. Brian D 11 years ago
      
      The don't begin to matter until they move to America and can start voting for Democrats.
2. Ted S. 11 years ago
  
  I apologize for PBrooksing the reply. I would have apologized sooner, but as I was typing the reply enough snow finished off the job of blocking the satellite internet connection, so I had to go up on the roof to clear it off.
  
  In 16 inches of fresh snow, never mind the stuff that was up there already.
The Hyperbole 11 years ago

Why is the Media disappointed that Obamacare has stopped the runaway downhill Jobs trend.
SweatingGin 11 years ago

It's not too soon to make a Sonny Bono joke, is it?
1. Slammer 11 years ago
  
  Damn you!
2. UnCivilServant 11 years ago
  
  That evil copyright extender? No, quip away.
3. Ted S. 11 years ago
  
  I was going to make a Michael Schumacher joke, but I thought it would be in bad taste.
  1. EDG reppin' LBC 11 years ago
    
    This is H&R. The steel cage grudge match of Internet forums. There is no such thing as bad taste here. Fire away.
Slammer 11 years ago

This cartoon is sick. Sonny Bono's birthday is this weekend.
1. UnCivilServant 11 years ago
  
  Just remember, thanks to him, you still can't sing "Happy Birthday" without someone trying to get royalties out of you.
  1. gaijin 11 years ago
    
    Yeah, but you have to wear a ski helmet because of him. Fair tradeoff?
    1. UnCivilServant 11 years ago
      
      How is that a tradeoff? It's a loss on both sides. I have to pay someone who claims their ancestor wrote a song, and I have to wear a helmet? Did you catch the cerebral flu in the snow storm?
      1. gaijin 11 years ago
        
        Did you catch the cerebral flu in the snow storm?
        
        No, it's a genetic condition. 🙂
        
        I actually misread your comment as if we 'can' sing HB without royalties. Looks like I picked the wrong week to give up amphetamines.
        
        gimmeasammich 11 years ago
        
        Is this a coincidence, or a cleverly placed reference to Sonny Bono and the fact that he was the bomber in Airplane II: The Sequel? If so, nice job.
Fist of Etiquette 11 years ago

As we try to figure out what went wrong??? I'll tell you what went wrong. Bill O'Reilly was right. You let gays into the Olympics and next thing you know we're marrying trees.
1. Swiss Servator, Befehl! 11 years ago
  
  *opera applause*
2. SugarFree 11 years ago
  
  Very well done.
Lord Humungus 11 years ago

I always think "No, this is the worst comic" ever in the history of H&R.

and then I'm proven wrong. Again.
Fist of Etiquette 11 years ago

This is obviously a scene from Weekend at Steve's 2: iFun on the Slopes.
Almanian! 11 years ago

Sorry I'm late - work and all, blah, blah, blah.

So - awful. Therefore - perfect. Although I must commend Payne on the number of labels - juuuuust about right.

Happy Friday, Reasonoid. Fuck the Limpiks!
GILMORE 11 years ago

I don't get it.

Why are 'jobs' on vacation? Ski instructors? Sonny Bono joke? Something about Tree Huggers? Jewish Tree Huggers (star of david flying from his face)

These things are far too abstract for me.
Cdr Lytton 11 years ago

Tree? Obamacare? I thought this was about gays at Sochi and well endowed black men.
alan_s 11 years ago

What are the skier and the tree supposed to represent?

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Friday Funnies: Obamacare and Jobs

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