Stolen Truck with Radioactive Material Recovered in Mexico
Thieves got more than they bargained for.
A pair of thieves in Mexico may have stolen more than they bargained for when they targeted a truck this week.
The stolen vehicle was carrying a delicate cargo -- a radioactive element used for medical purposes that also can be used to make a so-called dirty bomb.
Mexican authorities said they'd found the stolen truck and the container that had been holding radioactive cobalt Wednesday, hours after the International Atomic Energy Agency announced the theft.
The container was found about a kilometer away from the truck and had been opened, said Juan Eibens Chutz, head of Mexico's National Commission for Nuclear Security.
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Oh no-skies!!! Radioactive cooties have escaped everywhere!!! What'll we do, What'll we do, pink elephants on parade! I think that by now, the radioactive cooties have escaped irreparably FUBAR-ly (Fucked Up Beyond All Repair), contaminating the entirety of North America by now, at LEAST at the rate of one to three molecules of cooties per cubic light-year, it is HIGH TIME that Emperor Obozo shall be FORCED to martial-law-isolate-lock-down / confiscate ALL of North America, if not more, to PROTECT US ALL!!! It is the LEAST that He could do, ya know? It's fer the CHILDRENZ, ya know?