New Jersey School District Implements Total Ban on Peanuts

Not normally a person who restricts things, says one yes vote, but children's safety's at stake


Lyndhurst School District via the Observer

The Lyndhurst school district in New Jersey voted in a special meeting 7 to 2 in favor of a policy banning students in Kindergarten through 8th grade from bringing any peanuts or peanut-containing foods onto school grounds. High school students are now allowed to eat peanuts only in the cafeteria. The district already had a restrictive peanut policy, allowing the consumption of food containing peanut only in designated classrooms by students in 4th through 8th grade, which came about  The anti-peanut policy was first implemented after one child had an "apparent reaction." The parent of that child is a member of the school board. The local Observer reports:

BOE member Jim Hooper told The Observer last week that it was one of his sons who was stricken at the time. He elaborated: "I have two sons who have peanut allergies. We don't have cafeterias in our elementary schools and sometime during the 2004-2005 school year, one of them who was attending Roosevelt School where, at the time, the kids ate lunch in the gym, had a reaction to something while he was in his gym class."

The boy was taken to an area hospital and recovered, Hooper said.

"If we had a new middle school and new cafeteria – which we've tried to get [through a public referendum that failed] – where we could come up with something that would allow non-allergic kids to eat peanuts, then maybe we could control things better," Hooper said. "But we don't. Some kids can go into anaphylactic shock from being exposed to peanuts. So, it's a safety issue. "I'm not normally a guy who restricts things," Hooper said, "but we're trying to protect the kids."

The policy change came about after a "concerned parent" thought the peanut policy wasn't strict enough, says the school superintendent. In a letter to parents she warned:

"Nut allergies can be life threatening. It takes only the slightest smell, touch, or ingestion of peanuts, peanut butter, peanut oil, a product that may contain trace amounts of peanuts or a product that has been processed in a plant that also manufactures peanut products, to cause a potential anaphylactic reaction.

A few years ago, a Harvard professor of medical sociology, Nicholas Christakis, suggested that the increased worry over peanut allergies resembled mass psychogenic illness, better known as epidemic hysteria. Only about 150 people a year die from all food allergies combined, he noted, similar to the number of people who die from lightning strikes and earthquakes combined.

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  1. Only about 150 people a year die from all food allergies combined, he noted, similar to the number of people who die from lightning strikes and earthquakes combined.

    Obviously, NJ schools must implement a lightning and earthquake ban.

    1. Or at least restrict lightning and earthquakes to the cafeteria.

  2. In a perfect libertarian world, there would be no public schools.

    In the world we have, if your precious little snowflake is so profoundly allergic to a substance that he can't stand to even be in the same school-sized building as that substance, maybe contemplate keeping the little bastard out of schools rather than demanding everybody else adjust their lives to accommodate him.

    1. Actually, in the world we have, I kind of err on the side of not using your tax dollars to inflict your children with a deadly allergy outbreak, especially since education is compulsory in some if not all states. I see your point, but I also see the other side of this as well.

      1. I don't. Fuck that side.

        1. Eh. If the state is extracting taxes from you to educate your child, and they mandate your child must attend a state-approved school, it's not completely idiotic to expect them to make accommodation for your child's education. It's a typical tragedy of the commons problem.

  3. I know it sounds harsh, but if you have a peanut allergy, God does not want you to live.

    1. +1 Reese's

    2. Well, it means god hates you because you can't eat the deliciousness that is peanuts. Whether he hates you so much he wants you dead is another matter.

    3. A few months ago there were talks about introducing peanut proteins in with some of your own cells to trick your body into thinking it had no problems with peanuts.

      It's going to be awesome when they all end up with horrible autoimmune issues later, no?

      1. You want all the peanuts for yourself, don't you?

        1. He wants all nuts to himself

            1. Now watch as I craft a nuts joke so clever that it's never... been thought of... before...

              1. Do it, FoE, be my hero and come up with a nuts joke I haven't heard in the 13 years I've been out of the closet and telling people I don't like/am allergic to nuts.

                1. You: I'm allergic to nuts.

                  Me: [Something clever about you taking it on the chin]

                  BOOM NAILED IT

                  1. I don't know about "nailed" it but you certainly did as well or better than most. Totally satisfactory.

                    1. Fine, the actual reply was going to be simply:

                      Man, you're really taking it on the chin with that allergy.

                      But me, being me, decided to layer some extra humor on.

                    2. The layered version was a sexy scantily clad person, but then you had to do the unveiling and it's all third nipples and pigeon chests.

                    3. That's what you get for your coy "satisfactory" remark.

                    4. No you're right, that was entirely my fault.

  4. How is it that peanut allergies are now so common? 40 years ago they were almost unheard-of.

    And I am sooooo tired of tiny minorities demanding that the world be arranged around their needs. It makes me want to spray peanut dust everywhere and let nature take its course....

    1. Most of it is, as far as Science can tell, psychogenic/mass hysteria.

      Some of it might be dietary changes.

      And some of it is probably noticing them more than before, I suspect.

      (The rate of peanut allergy is said to be around 1% in the US, and most of them are not of the "cause anaphylaxis if you eat one" level, of course.)

      1. (The rate of peanut allergy is said to be around 1% in the US, and most of them are not of the "cause anaphylaxis if you eat one" level, of course.)

        I just found out a few months ago that I was allergic to peanuts, which sucks ass because I loved Reese's. I don't show any outward symptoms if I eat peanuts; instead, it causes something called eosinophilic esophagitis.

        It's funny when I ask at a restaurant about whether or not a dish has peanuts in it or not, because even if I explain that I am not very sensitive at all the waitstaff freaks out and acts like I'm one of the ones that will drop dead if I'm even in the same room as a peanut. I just probably shouldn't be eating them if I don't want food to get stuck in my throat.

        1. We were talking about this in an earlier thread. My throat gets itchy when I eat walnuts and pecans but I've started telling people I don't like them, but don't mind picking around them because they freak the fuck out if I mention I'm MILDLY allergic.

          1. I did a lot of that before I got my allergy test (turns out I was allergic to most nuts, excepting almonds and brazil nuts, for some odd reason). I never really liked most nuts to begin with, and some, like hazelnuts, did cause outward symptoms, but people (mostly family members) wouldn't believe me when I said I was allergic to them. So I just said I didn't like them.

            I still mostly do that at restaurants; the only time I inform people is if I'm not sure what's in the dish I'm thinking about ordering.

            1. I remember not liking walnuts as young as 4 or 5, and then I just picked around them, I tried one when I was a little older but thought it was disgusting and was told it might have been rancid.

              A few years ago I was forced to eat a bit of praline cheesecake for politeness sake and found out that shit is delicious, but that I felt like I'd swallowed a wool sock (I assume that's why I thought the walnut was so vile). I have ONE praline whenever I'm in NOLA and pick around walnuts and pecans in every other context.

              1. They look the same going in as coming out.

                1. Chew, Mr. Skull, chew.

        2. My brother is on a no nuts, seed shells, vegetable skins, or fiber whatsoever diet. He ignores the shit out of it, though.

          1. Severe diverticulitis? I can think of other reasons for a low/zero residue diet, but most of them are uncommon.

            1. One of the shitty ones.

        3. This stuff where they think being in the same room as a peanut will cause you to keel over is pure bullshit. Nobody (except the people who placebo-psyche themselves into reacting) has a negative reaction merely from the smell of peanuts.

          And anyone who has any sort of a reaction from merely touching them is most likely going to get an itchy rash, not keel over gasping.

          Some few rare people may die if they eat them but if they die at the mere sight of them then it's pure psychological hysteria and they should probably rule it suicide. Dude freaked himself out to death.

    2. There's a recommendation that infants should be on formula/titmilk sustenance only for a certain amount of time, because things, especially peanuts, will be improperly digested and can result in the development of allergies later.

    3. In the early twentieth century it was more widely accepted that people just "up and died". Epidemiology wasn't that advanced. By 1973 (forty years ago) they were starting to get a clue.

      1. Sure, but I don't think it was common to eat something, turn red, swell up, and die.

        1. Oral sex caused such reactions back before showers and Irish Spring.

          I was told that, not sure if documentation is readily available.

  5. That's the last straw, Lyndhurst. I'm never going to Medieval Times again.

  6. Can we get newspapers to institute a total ban on "Peanuts" reruns now?

    1. Someone had to do it eventually.

    2. Fuck you! Merry Christmas, Charlie Brown!

        1. I think you just won the thread.

    3. More specifically, can we ban any Peanuts episode that has Rerun in it? One of the worst cartoon characters of all time. Towlie is great compared to that little shit.

  7. Joked about it before, but I really want to get some betting going on when a student gets disciplined for drawing a picture of a peanut (or eating a pop-tart in the shape of a peanut).

    Maybe include "held a peanut or peanut containing product in a threatening manner"

    I'm thinking 50/50 by the end of this school year, and 80/20 by the end of October of next year.

    1. You're joking, except this makes perfect sense. Just like the way idiot animists totemize guns or cigarette-shaped vapers or large soft drinks to the point where they see them not as objects but actively evil things imbued with some sort of mystical power, some of them will do it with peanuts. Just the way the father was talking about it, it was like he considers peanuts to be like some kind of contagion that you needed special facilities to contain.

      1. I'm not joking. Given a bit of time to decide on odds, rates, and winning conditions (reported by what sources, etc), I'll wager bitcoins on this.

        1. I agree with you.

          Check out the "Chemical Weapons" post from this morning, if you haven't seen it.

          1. I missed out.

            Day job got in the way of H&R time today. Wish the Kochs would pay enough for shilling that I didn't need that.

            At least I made it to the bitcoin thread.

      2. And the rest of you analysis of it is spot on, animists, indeed.

      3. It's because they were invented by a black person.

        Totally racist. That guys probably a tea bagger.

      4. Can we not just get Obamacare to 3D print plastic bubbles for the Peanut-snowflakes? Worked for John Travolta ...

    2. Or a marshmallow peanut.

    3. I was an am the kind of logical person who would react to things like this by taunting those in authority about it, and blatantly violating the rules.

  8. Found a peanut, found a peanut...

  9. NUTS!

  10. I am fatally allergic to peanuts and shellfish and have been my entire life. It is not possible to be more allergic to peanuts or shellfish than I am. However, I was never quarantined or coddled by my parents and I had an entirely normal childhood (besides my dislike of Halloween, since I could not eat any of the good candy). In my whole life, I have only had 3 episodes where I entered into anaphylactic shock.

    I can say with 100% certainty that simply smelling or touching peanuts will not send a person into anaphylaxis. Direct contact with peanuts will only result in a rash at worst. Anaphylaxis only occurs after ingestion of the allergen.

    My cousin has a young boy with gluten, peanut and nut allergies. She is certainly a product of the "epidemic hysteria". While I believe her child's allergies are real, she is extremely over-protective of him. I have told her that she is making the situation worse and will end up alienating him from his peers and cause him to feel inferior, but she tells me that I don't understand. Sure, whatever...

    1. My wife has the same allergy, but to chocolate. Chocolate, for fuck's sake!

      We do not lack for chocolate-covered peanuts (IRONY!), s'mores, Godiva and other delectables in my house.


      Fuck, I hate people. And I'm truly sorry about your allergy - that's a bitch. Appreciate your attitude about it 🙂

      1. Chocolate is different. I don't think if your wife ate chocolate that she would go into anaphylaxic shock. Chocolate is more like a digestive intolerance, like lactose. You'll get sick, but you can't really die.

        1. You are incorrect. Her throat closes, and she ceases being able to breathe.

          So, other than being utterly wrong with your speculation, and lacking any facts whatsoever, you're spot on.

          1. Then it is not the chocolate she'd allergic to, it's something else. Cocoa allergies are extremely rare. If your wife does indeed have one, she'd be one in a billion.

            1. I am allergic to chocolate and a few other foods. I have been tested, it's not a conclusion I came to on my own. Allergies are reactions to proteins and chocolate contains protein, and one can indeed have a true allergy to it.

          2. My wife reacted the same way when I suggested a rubber sheet and trapeze in the bedroom. WTF is up with that?

      2. Actually, as I am sitting here at my desk, my co-worker is snacking on a bag of peanuts from 5-Guys Burgers. He has them spread all over his desk and is cracking the shells. Am I concerned? Not even a little.

        The scariest experience I ever had was when I was 8 and my family was flying out to Colorado. This was before most flights were peanut free, so when everyone opened up their bags of peanuts my eyes swelled shut and my whole body broke into hives. It wasn't anaphylaxis, but it was terrifying to be a little kid and be confined in an airplane while this was happening to you.

        1. "5-Guys Burgers"


          1. What's wrong with 5GB&F?

            1. It's just for people who don't have In N Out.

              1. I have never had In-N-Out and I guarantee that I would like it better than Five Guys. Five-Guys burgers are so greasy and shitty and lame that I can make a better burger myself without even trying. The fries are just terrible and soggy. I need to get to an In-N-Out but I hate the west coast. I want to try that animal style shit.

                1. The Double Double is the King of fast food burgers. However your experience with 5 Guys is dissimilar to mine. Fries are always crispy and amazing. Could be location/franchise problems.

                  Having said that, 5Guys is overpriced, but it sure as hell ain't hurting their business.

              2. ^This. I have a lot of friends from out of state (as you know, I go to USC), and a few of them swear, even after trying In N Out, that Five Guys is better. I've tried 5 guys (there's one right by USC's campus now) and it's not bad, but it is nowhere near as good as In N Out. I have no idea how they can insist otherwise, besides blind regional pride.

        2. When my sister was five, she went to go sit on the bumper of the car and put her hand down on a bee. Within a minute or two she could barely breathe and was all red and swollen. My mom was FREAKING OUT, and so was my sister. Luckily we were able to get to medical aid quickly, but after that my sister had to carry her epi-pen around with her at all times. She also didn't have to do any yard chores, that bitch.

          1. Wow, she is really committed to the lie. Anything to get out of yard work these days...

            1. I was always yelling at my parental units to do some fucking yard work. They would get association fines if I didn't nuke the weeds. I felt uncomfortable about making eye contact with the neighbors.

            2. No shit. I had to mow the god damn lawn and rake the leaves (even though the bees were usually hibernating by that point) and shovel the walks. Why was I the only one who had to shovel the walks? There's no god damn bees or wasps in winter! I think she had to feed the cats. That was it.

              I tried to get the Brown Shugga or the Hairy Eyeball but failed at two supermarkets. I talked to the stockboy at the second one and he said he had a voicemail in with his sales rep asking why the hell he didn't have any, and is thinking that someone/some company is buying it all up too fast.

              I'm going to a specialty beer store in West Seattle in a few minutes to see if they managed to get any. Why is this such a pain in the ass?

              1. Aliens. Remember the run on the Thanksgiving stuffing?

              2. Because it is so damn delicious. When I am looking for Pliny the Elder (AKA the best beer in the world), I do it by phone first because there is a 75percent failure rate.

                Do you have BevMo up there?

              3. Bees don't fucking hibernate.

    2. I can say with 100% certainty that simply smelling or touching peanuts will not send a person into anaphylaxis. Direct contact with peanuts will only result in a rash at worst. Anaphylaxis only occurs after ingestion of the allergen.

      You say that now, but you haven't witnessed the awesome might of my peanut-vapor missiles!

      1. Chemical weapons treaty VIOLATION.

    3. One of my cousins had allergies, probably to gluten and some other stuff. My aunt and uncle at first tried to control him, but eventually gave up because they got sick of telling their kid he couldn't have obviously tasty food while everyone else did. They let him eat it, and he decided whether the itchiness and runny nose were worth it. He seemed to think so. He grew up into a good kid, no problems.

      One of my childhood friends had a little brother that was super allergic to almost everything. But his reaction wasn't to get itchy, it was to get completely psychotically hyper, to the point where he would do things like leap over furniture and break his arm because he was so hyper. So his mom went FULL BAN in an attempt to control this. I once gave him some money for an ice cream cone and when she found out she almost killed me. He grew up and became a heroin addict. He's ok now, he kicked it, but...even though these are anecdotes, I think I see a pattern here.

    4. Dots are good. You didn't eat the Dots?

    5. Murgatroyd - thanks for posting that.

      Google "Munchausen by Proxy" for more info which may be relevant to your cousin.

    6. I happen to think it's a good attitude to have as well. A former ladyfriend of mine was deathly allergic to mushrooms. All that she ever said was "I'm allergic - don't give me them to eat" and that was it. No song and dance and no one else had to change their eating habits (although I did have to swear off them while we were together - small price!)

      1. Why former? Did someone give her mushrooms?

  11. I'm going to move to this district just so I can pass out peanut butter cups for Halloween. I'll drop off a bag of them in front of the school every year, just to watch the HazMat team come in to dispose of the ZOMFG!11one! "threat".

    I hope they all die from lack of essential oils provided by peanuts.

  12. The Lyndhurst school district in New Jersey voted in a special meeting 7 to 2 in favor of a policy banning students in Kindergarten through 8th grade from bringing any peanuts or peanut-containing foods onto school grounds.

    We voted 2-0 in favor of a policy banning our kids from attending public schools.

      1. More like -2

  13. The parent of that child is a member of the school board.

    Nuff said

    1. I was looking for that the instant I started reading the article.

  14. I am also allergic to nuts. I wish people would stop electing them.

  15. On a more serious note, the actual science says that you cannot have an allergic reaction to the smell of peanuts; that life-threatening reactions cannot occur from just touching it (it must be ingested); and that even in situations where peanut particles can be present in the air, it is extremely unlikely that anaphylactic shock will occur.

    It's been shown that reactions to the smell of peanuts are not actually the result of the allergy, but to the fear of the allergen.

    1. [Citation needed.] Seriously, I'd be interested in references to this. It accords with my prejudices, but it would be nice to have some scientific data to back it up...

  16. How did America survive before 2011?

  17. "Nut allergies can be life threatening

    So can government. Let's ban that.

  18. "The parent of that child is a member of the school board."


    I bought a pack of peanuts the other day, the hot kind. Haven't had them in years. They were damn good.

  19. I am allergic to peanuts, but I love the little bastards. So once or twice a year, I steel myself for the rash and sinfully chow down on a Reeses cup. And fuck these little snowflakes' parents. The world will most certainly not be nut free, and the snowflakes with food allergies need to learn early on to be wary of eating other people's lunches.

  20. Estimates say that in the United States, thousands of people visit the emergency room annually because of allergic reactions to food. Somewhere around 150 to 200 people die in the U.S. each year because of food allergies. It's estimated that around 50 percent to 62 percent of those fatal cases of anaphylaxis were caused by peanut allergies


    Although the number of people who die annually from peanut allergies is in the low hundreds at most, peanuts have gotten a reputation for being particularly deadly. While some people call peanut allergies an epidemic, others say the situation has been blown out of proportion. For example, Professor Nicolas Christakis of Harvard Medical School told the BBC that there was "a gross overreaction to the magnitude of the threat." He even said that the fear of peanuts had led to a situation resembling mass psychogenic illness -- once known as epidemic hysteria.

    In a country of 360(?) million people, your chances of dying from the Demon Peanut is near fuck zero. Nut up, bitches. If your kid is deadly allergic to peanuts, consider a special school or one of those bubbles that John Travolta was in in that classic movie. My daughter's lunch tomorrow: Peanut butter sandwich.

    1. I believe it was called "John Travolta's Disease". The disease, that is, not the movie.

  21. "Nut allergies can be life threatening. It takes only the slightest smell, touch, or ingestion of peanuts, peanut butter, peanut oil, a product that may contain trace amounts of peanuts or a product that has been processed in a plant that also manufactures peanut products, to cause a potential anaphylactic reaction.

    Someone's been watching reruns of "Franks and Geeks" a little too often.

  22. This is interesting, because I always wondered how much of this was nonsense. I knew a lot of it must be, because it's not like people were complaining about this in such numbers even a couple of decades ago.

    1. Like so many other things, as we have increased communication and dissemination of unscientific information online, the hypochondriacs and Munchausen by proxy idiots can all get together and reinforce one another's idiocy and paranoia.

      The internet it a great thing. It is also a great concentrator of stupidity, irrationality, and obsession. Which is not so great.

      1. What you're telling me is that I can vaccinate my kids then? And let them go trick-or-treating?

        1. Send them straight to Episiarch's house. Warty may answer the door though. So fair warning.

          1. I may be n?ive, but I'm not insane.

  23. haha. I went to school in Lyndhurst. What a shitty school system. That is all.

  24. Anecdotaly, the problem is that the professionals exacerbate the problem. My daughter's allergist have us carry an epipen because...well, just in case. Nothing firm. No hard facts. But he doesn't want to get his ass caught on the other side of a lawsuit. Same with the school who was trying to push an IEP for a mild allergy.

    Like usual, it all comes down to liability.

  25. I have a friend that is a chef and he has had people with the allergy (supposedly) ask the items on the menu are cooked with peanut oil. The oil is not what causes an allergic reaction and any commercial product is so highly refined, there is no chance of any contaminant being present in the oil to cause a reaction. He has needed to explain this to people who should know (as they are supposed to have this allergy) several times.

    1. From what I understand, it depends on the refining process. Highly refined ones, like you say, aren't an issue. But there are some methods, such as cold pressing, that leave quite a bit of the protein in the oil, and can be problematic. And unless you're buying the oil it's hard to tell what kind it is, so some people simply avoid it altogether.

  26. I know a guy who is *deathly* allergic to peppers. Green bell peppers. He's currently suing a restaurant for putting him in the emergency room after he explicitly told them of his condition.

    1. Did they explicitly promise to not serve him peppers? Did he order stuffed peppers? Green bell pepper is sorta like bones in fish and seeds in fruit, you kinda have to expect it in a lot of dishes.

      1. Wow, what.

        He told them of his condition. Liable. BOOM.

  27. I personally think, and no offense to those that truly suffer, that this shit is mostly in the minds of a hypochondriac, victim-centric culture.

    I know it's anecdotal, but...

    I worked most of the time between '95 and '12 in restaurants, in every capacity, and saw a geometric rise in people with allergies. I'd never heard about celiac disease until 2008, or so, and after that had a few customers a week claiming the disease. Almost 15 goddamn years go by and I never, ever, hear of this, but now it's a fucking epidemic?

    Hell, I had one lady that told me she had celiac and then ordered a dish that would contain gluten. I told her this, and she said she had it before and didn't have a reaction so she'd still take it. Wow, that's awesome lady, you've got an allergy that only affects food you don't like.

    1. It's caused by obesity, smoking, and gun ownership.

    2. If I were seriously allergic to a common ingredient, I don't think I'd trust restaurants to give me food that was completely free of whatever I was allergic to.

      1. I've always wondered about that. Is what you're ordering really gluten free?

        1. depends on the level of restaurant.

        2. I feel bad for the real celiacs because everybody I know in the business thinks it's mental hoodoo and nothing to worry about.

          Now if you are really allergic to something and tell your server everybody will work to ensure that your not exposed to the allergen. I've never seen someone (un)intentionally give someone something they claimed to be allergic to.

          1. I've totally seen mistakes made, but not for a lack if effort. People really do go out of their way to do their best to check ingredients and use clean utensils.

    3. The first time you let them through, they told all the other victims of allergies.

      Protip: recommend Thai gluten noodles with peanuts.

    4. Celiac's isn't actually an allergy, it's an autoimmune disorder. It causes intestinal damage and can have severe long-term consequences among sufferers who continue to eat gluten. Gluten intolerance is different, it's a digestive intolerance that leads to symptoms like diarrhea.

  28. I remembered there being some baseball team that banned peanuts from a section or something, so I googled it. Look! there's a whole blog about about peanut free baseball.
    Were people dying all the time like 40 years ago from peanuts and nobody knew why, or is this whole thing overblown? I'm going with overblown.

    1. Also, peanut free baseball is stupid and unamerican.

  29. This is nothing. I heard a story on the CBC a while ago about a district in Canada that not only banned peanut products, but also other nut butters and anything else that looked like a peanut product because people might mistake it for a peanut product and get the wrong idea or something.

    1. I ate a pop tart into the shape of a peanut, is that okay?

    2. Like mistaking e-cigs for tobacco!

  30. My peanuts exceed all standards -

  31. I knew whose side you guys would be on. After all, one look at Mr. Peanut and you can tell he's a libertarian.

    1. Peanut butter was invented by a white libertarian to oppress black people. Go ahead, look it up. I'll wait.

      1. :

        Yes, George Washington invented Peanut Butter. And he had slaves.

    2. Planters Peanuts' monocled mascot is a libertarian legume.

  32. This whole thing brought a tear to my eye, reminding me of the glorious Usenet days circa 1997 when alt.peeves engaged in a peanut related flamewar with

    Some kindred spirit told a mom it wasn't his fault she'd given birth to a genetic freak and her failure to do the right thing and drown it at birth didn't mean he couldn't have peanuts on an airplane.

    People knew how to troll back then. Today we just have Shriek.

    1. He was trolling?

  33. Did anyone notice that Lyndhurst is located right next to Nutley, NJ?

    1. Across the river, but yea. Why?

      1. shit I'm retarded. I finally got the joke.

        1. Careful, you're Jersey is showing.

          1. *your. Sweet poetic justice.

  34. This is one of those things where I think you have to have a kid with such an allergy to understand.

    I think they should not ban peanut products.

    But in a Libertarian world, this would not be an issue as the free market would just open up schools for kids with peanut allergies.

    1. IT CHANGES EVERYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!


  35. Sometimes man you jsut have to roll with it dude.

  36. They're not nuts!

    "I have an allergy to nuts"

    Well I guess legumes are okay then, right?

    My one-hobbit crusade: change the name to "nutpeas"

    ... Hobbit

  37. Why are they eating anything in class?

  38. "A concerned parent"...
    Seriously. How many stupid ass nanny regulations are due to these helicopter soccer moms who need to protect their kids from the world? Fuck it's annoying

  39. how about just giving the allergic kid a benadryl and keeping an epi- pen in the nurse's office. That and keep an eye on any brat with a known condition.

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