Brickbat: Lowblow


Lauderhill, Florida, police officers Thomas Merenda and Franklin Hartley have been charged with unlawful compensation, a felony carrying to 15 years, and battery for allegedly demanding sexual favors not to arrest two women after a traffic stop. Prosecutors say Hartley stopped a vehicle carrying two women leaving a local strip club, threatened to arrest the driver for DUI and ordered them to follow him to a parking lot. That's where Merenda joined them. Hartley allegedly ordered the passenger to perform oral sex on him and then had intercourse with her. Merenda's request was a little kinkier. He asked the woman to hit him in "the nuts."


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  1. Merenda’s request was a little kinkier. He asked the woman to hit him in “the nuts.”

    Who wouldn’t punch a cop in the dick to get out of a ticket?

    1. Ex-fuckin-actly! You can almost hear her say, “Holy Shit! There is a god!”

      Well, I should say you would be able to if she wouldn’t have had to watch his partner extort sex from her co-worker.

      1. They would have arrested her for battery at that point.

  2. Alt text fail! Does not contain “douchebags.”

  3. Is rape usually charged as “battery” in Florida? For which set of charges is the expected penalty higher? If the charges they got give a lower penalty than basic aggavated rape and kidnapping (forcing someone to go somewhere against their will), then it lays waste to the idea that these cops were not treated by a double standard.

    I would assume a rape charge would be aggravated by the fact that it was done by a law enforcement authority with the implicit threat of legal action against the victim.

    Imagine the smorgasbord of charges a non-LEO defendant would be charged with in this situation.

    1. And read the original article, it actually says near the beginning that officials said it was “because he liked it” that he is being charged with “unlawful compensation”. So, if he didn’t like, what would the charge have been?

      I have to admit that for this guy he should just be fired and his face should be on the front page of papers nationwide, and suffer the rest of his days as a laughingstock.

    2. I’d guess that “sexual battery” is the charge for rape there. I don’t think most states have a crime called “rape”, it’s usually aggravated sexual assault or something like that.

      1. Or maybe not. From the article:

        “battery, a misdemeanor punishable by up to 60 days”

    3. IANAL.

      What we think of as rape, is charged as “sexual battery” in FL. See, generally, ? 794 Florida Statutes. 794.011(4)(g) seems to cover the conduct here, and is a first degree felony. And that’s before any sentence enhancements for using a firearm. Violating the unlawful compensation statute OTOH, which is really a subset of soliciting a bribe, is a second degree felony.

      How much you want to bet this guy gets a sweet plea deal, a la the Oklahoma manslaughter case mentioned yesterday, assuming the grand jury even chooses to indict?

  4. I must admit. I try to keep up on the latest trends, but I haven’t heard of wanting to be punched in the nuts by a stripper. Unless, it was so he wouldn’t blow his wad too soon.

    Ooo yeah baby, suck it. SHIT! I’m gonna cum. Punch me in the nuts,

    1. Maybe it doesn’t have anything to do with the fact she’s a stripper, just a case of
      “picking low-hangin fruit”. Not that this makes it any trendier.

  5. I really need to start forwarding these to my friend who is the daughter of a cop. She is one of those “If you aren’t doing anything wrong….” people.

  6. The one unlawful command I’d be happy to comply with. I’d ask for a glove first, though.

    And yes, this isn’t “unlawful” compensation. It’s rape under threat of duress. Anyone else but our brave boys in blue would have been charged as such.

    1. Bingo. Just more proof that some prosecutors are real dirtbags.

  7. Unlawful compensation? So if they grossly abused their power for a new puppy, that would be OK?

  8. Also, how terrifying would it be to be raped by a Terminator? Look at that guy.

    1. I smell a buddy cop comendy, where they rape their way across Florida to the strains of 80s hair metal and get yelled at by a police chief that doesn’t know what it takes to be out on the mean streest of Lauderhill any longer. Because he got soft sitting behind a desk all those years, facing nothing more dangerous than a papercut. Stupid old chief! They get results!

      1. “Chris Tucker will star as Frank, a new arrival on the Lauderhill police force, and he mixes “wacky” antics with intuitive detective skills. Steven Seagal will star as Tom, a 20-year veteran with a getting-nut-punched fetish and who is just three weeks from retirement. Together, they have to stop a gang of criminal strippers, who are conspiring to bring the local PD up on rape charges. Can Frank and Tom stop the strippers, or will Lauderhill lose its entire police force and fall into anarchy?”

        “I like it.”

  9. Can’t charge them with rape. Then they’d be sex offenders.

  10. Man caught sleeping illegally on a Texas beach was ‘brutally beaten by two cops and held underwater’ as dash-cam rolled…..olled.html

    Q: What do you do if you’re a cop and you walk up on a couple of your brothers in blue beating an unarmed man who is face-down in the surf, complaining that he’s drowning?

    A: Kick him in the head!

    1. Why am I not surprised to see that it’s Galvatraz cops getting accused of brutality? I also like how the Chief’s quoted, in response to the suit, that the plaintiff has two drug convictions on his record. Well, all-righty then. Who knew that a drug conviction meant that you volunteered to be a pinata for the cops?

      Oh, and in B4 someone decides to point out that this would never have happened if he hadn’t run from the cops. That’s true, but they still don’t get to kick the shit out of him and try to drown his ass.

      1. Who knew that a drug conviction meant that you volunteered to be a pinata for the cops?

        Drug users are not human.

  11. Requesting something of value in exchange for not doing something…

    If the something you don’t do is illegal that’s extortion. If the something you don’t do is is your duty because you’re a cop, that’s soliciting a bribe.

    They should be charged with one of these in addition to everything else.

  12. So, which one of the pics is the guy who wanted the punch in the nuts?

    If he really enjoys that sort of thing, I have a horse….

    1. Merenda is the white guy. When was the last time you saw a white guy named “Franklin”?

  13. When a guy with a gun and a baton in plain view orders you to perform oral sex on him it’s rape. Especially, when it’s common knowledge that that guy is predisposed to violence (if he’s a cop that’s a perfectly valid assumption to make). So two guys commit rape and one of them has an obnoxious smirk on his face for his mugshot and then they get charged with some bullshit lesser charge. Hooray!

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