A.M. Links: FBI Turns the Hairy Eyeball on Edward Snowden, House Votes for Limits on Indefinite Detention of U.S. Citizens, Justice Department Wants a Close Eye on NYPD's Stop-and-Frisk

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  1. Plane Took Seven Flights With Dead Stowaway In Wheel Well

    http://www.gadling.com/2013/06…..heel-well/

    1. I’ve always wanted to travel

      1. Start working at home with Google! This is certainly the nicest-work I have ever done . Last Monday I got a new Alfa Romeo from bringing in $7778. I started this 9 months ago and practically straight away started making more than $83 per hour. I work through this link, Bling6.com

    2. Was the stowaway named Bernie by any chance?

      1. No, Johnny Matrix.

  2. The United States will send military assistance to the rather motley assortment of rebels in Syria…

    “If you have to use these weapons on any 14-year-old blasphemers, try to keep it off the news, guys.”

    1. So the government is supplying weapons to al Qaeda, but they need to continue to spy on every American with a cell phone to prevent terrorism?

      1. You have to be an Ivy grad to understand. Or just be one of the sheep who will say how necessary both spying on Americans and arming future terrorists are.

  3. http://www.dailycal.org/2013/0…..l-debates/

    This guy is so dumb that I suspect he’s actually pro-gun and is writing the most retarded gun control talking points ever.

    1. If we hold this amendment to be all-powerful, then we should also give equal weight to the amendment following it: Soldiers cannot be quartered in your homes. I’m sure we all struggle with that problem day to day.

      Uh…good point, dude.

      1. Everything in the Bill of Rights should be considered so comically beyond what the government would ever do as the Third Amendment is.

        1. I find it kind of strange that the 3rd is actually treated correctly, given the way they rest of them are.

          1. Give them time

            1. It will start with just giving them lemonade and people will think libertarians are crazy to resist.

              1. So….how nice is your home, should someone be…um, quartered there? Stocked fridge and plenty of Scotch?

            2. Did it post-Katrina.

          2. Considering that money for the DOD is a big chunk of your overall tax bill, you are quartering troops, just not in your actual home.

            1. Most of that is for materiel, not personnel. But your statement would be equally true for any military of any size. It’s just that it’s constitutionally not the same thing since funding military forces is explicitly authorized in I.8 while the specific act of requiring civilians to keep troops in their homes during peacetime is forbidden.

              1. Not verbotten just restricted to owner agreement and compensation.

                I have told the story before on here but it is cool so I will repeat it:
                Some years ago (90s I think) the silo boys doing minuteman duty were caught in a real bad blizzard (either WY or NE) and the local farmers took them in for a day or two and fed them as a caring gesture. When the storm was gone a Col came by and paid each farmer who had done that the equivalent hotel rate going in the nearest towns for each person and day. Most farmers wanted to refuse the money, just doing their duty etc., but the Col said nope 3rd Amendment states this pretty clearly.

          3. It’s not. The reason the government would want to station troops in a private home isn’t that they’re too lazy to build barracks, it’s because back before the age of federal law enforcement and telecommunications, putting a soldier in someone’s home was how the government kept tabs on what they were up to. The soldier was see when they came and went, who the met with, what was said, etc. and report it back to his superiors.

            The third amendment is properly understood as a ban on government surveillance, and is just as abused as every other amendment in the Bill of Rights.

            1. Well that and the fact that there was a problem with the Brits forcing colonists to house soldier because they were an army not on their continent.

        2. Im using that, I will give you full credit.

    2. That’s possible, though I have seen people actually make the “use of a car” = “owning a gun” argument.

    3. 1. Gun control doesn’t work.
      Anyone who knows how to use Google can disprove this argument. It’s common knowledge that the states with the most stringent gun control policies hold lower rates of gun violence than states with the least control.

      I love when liberals try to make this argument, because in reality the only thing correlated with crime is the number of low income black men in an area. States with lots of gun control which have tons of low income black men have a good amount of crime. The same is true of States without much gun control.

      That’s why California (LOTS OF GUN CONTROL!) has so much more crime than Vermont (Very little gun control!). It’s also why a lot of Southern States give liberals the superficial impression that gun control works. The South has a lot more black people, which means that their crime rate is bound to be higher because the group that commits a lot of the crime makes up a larger percentage of the population.

      1. That sounds like a very American thing to say.

        1. No, because I’m saying it because it’s factually accurate and not because I think black people are inherently inferior. There are many reasons for it, most of them cultural, but it is a fact that a much higher percentage of crimes are committed by African Americans. Therefore places with larger percentages of black people tend to have more crime.

          It’s a fact that can be proven with virtually any crime statistics.

          1. Nah, we have to deny the facts so we don’t appear racist. That’s the best way to look at the world: through a gauzy veil of good feelings and hand wringing.

            1. Don’t deny the facts, but it is good to point out that it is not something inherent about black people, but the result of historical and cultural accident. Too many people will think that it’s racist to simply state the facts about crime rates and race and I, at least, prefer not to make it too easy for those people. Most are probably morons who won’t think about the issue with any nuance, but some people can be reached.

              1. Yes, I agree. I should have said that in my first post. For my part, I think a large portion of the problem is the decay of black families brought on by the welfare state and the violence bred by the war on drugs.

                I obviously wasn’t trying to say anything racist, despite Shrike’s apparent belief that I am in favor of denying the franchise to black people.

              2. Also, a lot of things that correlate to race in the US will also strongly correlate with income/poverty. I think it is important to look at that along side race when discussing things like this.

          2. Committed by or convicted of?

          3. But your remedies are racist. Denying blacks the right to vote, poll taxes, etc.

            1. What the fuck are you talking about? I have never said anything about denying black people the right to vote or the creation of poll taxes.

              You are the biggest lying scumbag in the universe.

              1. You’re GOP – that is your MO.

                1. HAhahahahahahahaha

                  Bull Connor and George Wallace were Democrats, as were the Byrds of Virginia.

                2. I’m so Republican that I consistently argue against war, the surveillance state, the drug war and military spending.

                  Also, point to a single active Republican who believes in the reinstatement of the poll tax. I’ll wait.

                  1. Well, I am not a fucking progressive either – but you fuckers falsely claim it.

                    Like I am the only classic liberal who voted Obama in 2008? I am honest to say the least.

                    1. Yeah, you’re a classic, all right.

                      A classic crusty sock.

                    2. You voted for the fucker last year too, asshole.

                      You aren’t a progressive. You’re an authoritarian statist.

                3. You’re GOP – that is your MO.

                  RevDrMLK was GOP too. Look it up.

                  1. Irish, Virginian, and LFOD,

                    Shriek is changing the topic on you to get his jollies. He wants you to defend the GOP, he enjoys it. Waste no time defending the GOP on this, just tell him to fuck off and ignore him from that point on.

                    1. Noted. Fuck off, Sockpuppet.

            2. But your remedies are racist. Denying blacks the right to vote, poll taxes, etc.

              You fucking louse, please go drop dead.

              1. You ought to know by now he’s a fucking progressive troll – ignore him.

                1. God I miss MNG

      2. Celebrate diversity!

      3. Uh, CA doesn’t actually have a high percentage of blacks (7.2% of the population, compared to latinos at 37.6% or Asians at 14.9%)

        I would say its not *blacks* per se but rather having large areas of low income people.

        ‘Cuz yah do sound kinda racist.

        1. Granted – 7.2% is huge compared to VT’s .76% (I never thought that any state was that white) but for you’re hypothesis to stand you’d have to show that blacks are so much more likely to commit crimes that they can meet or beat what latinos do with 5 times the numbers.

        2. No reason it can’t be both to some degree, just as there’s no reason to judge individual people differently based on this information.

          If you start crossing the street to avoid black people because of the correlation that’s racist behavior based on racist ideas, but acknowledging a correlation is not by itself racist.

    4. It’s common knowledge that the states with the most stringent gun control policies hold lower rates of gun violence than states with the least control. Look at Australia: In the aftermath of a mass shooting in 1996, Australia enacted sweeping gun control, including an assault weapons ban and increased background checks. How many mass shootings have occurred since then? You got it. 0

      That’s cute. Now what are the rates of violence, including the use of other or no weapons?

      Or perhaps being beaten to death makes you less dead than being shot to death?

      1. That’s cute. Now what are the rates of violence, including the use of other or no weapons?

        Or perhaps being beaten to death makes you less dead than being shot to death?

        This! I have almost bruised my head facepalming. In one argument I was in, the guy kept pointing out how gun violence had gone down in countries with no guns. When I pointed out that those same countries levels of ALL crime, especially violent crime, had skyrocketed, I was met with “yeah, but less gun violence”. Seriously, these people can’t see that it doesn’t matter to the victims that they were beaten to death, or were victims of a crime that otherwise wouldn’t have occurred. It’s perfectly fine for the rape statistics to skyrocket. It’s just dandy if assaults, muggings, etc go up. Just so long as nobody has a gun.

        1. “countries with no guns”

          It also helps to point out there’s no such thing.

      2. Mass killings still happen in the land down under:

        Childers Palace Fire – In June 2000, drifter and con-artist Robert Long started a fire at the Childers Palace backpackers hostel that killed 15 people.

        Monash University shooting – In October 2002, Huan Yun Xiang, a student, shot his classmates and teacher, killing two and injuring five. (Sounds like more than zero shootings since 1996.)

        Churchill Fire – 10 confirmed deaths due to a deliberately lit fire. The fire was lit on 7th of February 2009.

        Quakers Hill Nursing Home Fire – 10 confirmed and as many as 21 people may have died as a result of a deliberately lit fire in a Quakers Hill nursing home. The fire was lit early on 18th of November 2011.

  4. Florida Man, Arrested Picking Mushrooms In State Forest With Alligator In His Backpack
    http://www.huffingtonpost.com/…..28110.html

    Wildlife officials arrested five men in the Little Econ State Forest in Seminole County Sunday after an officer found them with magic mushrooms, marijuana and an alligator in a backpack, according to Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission spokeswoman Joy Hill.

    Hill said the group was stopped for picking hallucinogenic psilocybin mushrooms, which grow naturally in the forest. But during a search, an officer discovered a 2-foot alligator wrapped in a bandana and stuffed into the backpack of 30-year-old Titusville resident Rick Myers.

    1. God forbid people should want to alter their brain chemistry in ways the State doesn’t approve of.

    2. How dare he harvest that which grows naturally

      1. I suppose gators do grow naturally.

      2. Actually, the ‘shrooms were legal. The pot and gators weren’t.

        1. Then why were they stopped?

          1. His backpack was trying to slither away?

      3. Scruffy wants to GAMBOL!!!

    3. Titusville! My parents’ stomping grounds, holla!

    4. Wait a second –

      Since those mushrooms are illegal, the state forest is clearly a grow operation, and the “wildlife officials” and everyone else in the chain of command for park administration, right up to the governor, should be arrested today.

      That’s how they’d treat me if they found pot growing on my property. So fuck ’em, burn them all and shoot their fucking dogs.

      1. Speaking of dogs, I was at the vet 2 days ago and they were getting ready to put down a pit bull that had mauled a cat to death. The dog has never hurt a human, just other animals. I knew none of this when I walked in, I just saw the dog, who seemed to be a nice dog, so I naturally asked the dog, “How you doing?”

        It would have taken a court order for this to happen, but I question the court’s decision.

    5. Pssh. I put this up days ago.

  5. The House voted to restrict (but not eliminate) the president’s power to indefinitely detain U.S. citizens.

    Where were they on NDAA?

  6. New York cab driver reportedly dies after being stabbed in eye with umbrella

    Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013…..z2WCAM19ps

    Look for a short, fat, white man with a monocle and top hat.

    1. Thank god it wasn’t a gun!

      1. We need strict umbrella control laws. And the best part is, umbrella ownership isn’t protected by the constitution, so it should be easy!

        1. Actually it is (maybe). When used that way, an umbrella is an “arm”, I think.

        2. I should point out that a person only needs one umbrella in their possession since that’s the maximum number they can use legitimately.

          1. We need to legislate these quick release grips. No one needs to open their umbrella in less than 1 second. Plus they look scary.

  7. America’s Worst Charities

    “I want to work at a non-profit, not some icky corporation.”

    1. Did you notice how many of them are police organizations?

      1. Yep. I get calls at least once a week from police fundraisers. Usually some we’re taking the kids to Walmart to buy school supplies bullshit.

        1. I get calls from the Reserve Police Officers Association, or something like that. What the hell is a reserve police officer?

          1. Like military reserves – (usually) volunteer cops that can be called up when more cops are need on short notice/short term.

      2. Yes, some of the worst ones.

        National Narcotic Officers Associations Coalition paid out 4M to the people who brought in 4.8M and paid out nothing in direct cash aid.

        I assume the other 800K was eaten by admin costs.

        Seriously, get rid of either corporate taxes or non-profit status.

        1. Just get rid of corporate taxes. See the Fox News op ed below about the 60 year history of the IRS going after any church that didn’t tow the President’s lion.

          1. Yep. And if you get rid of corporate taxes you can raise cap gains/dividend rates back up to full income tax rates without a double taxation problem.

            Of course, I still have a problem with any income tax at all.

            Another possibility is to make C-corps pass thru entities. It might be too complicated though.

            And once again, I still have a problem with any income tax at all.

            1. Dammit, rob, you’re no libertarian! You want to raise taxes!

              1. BURN HIM!!!!

                “He turned me into a newt!”

                “Well I got better.”

        2. Get rid of both.

      3. They need to supplement the money they make from confiscating property.

    2. Yeah, but you can work at a non-profit for ten years and get your student loans forgiven.

      1. That’s can be a huge incentive for someone who went to a top tier school. We’re talking an extra 10-20k$ per year.

        1. Oh I know it. I think it’s utter bullshit. The government is making a value judgement on your choice of employment and distorting the market at the same time.

          Qualifying employment is any employment with a federal, state, or local government agency, entity, or organization or a non-profit organization that has been designated as tax-exempt by the Internal Revenue Service (IRS) under Section 501(c)(3) of the Internal Revenue Code (IRC). The type or nature of employment with the organization does not matter for PSLF purposes. Additionally, the type of services that these public service organizations provide does not matter for PSLF purposes.

        2. My sister has this as a pretty big factor in her job hunt, and she’s going to (obviously) take the option which pays back the least over 10 years, because she doesn’t have to care about the interest piling up.

    3. “United States Deputy Sheriffs’ Association”?

      “Reserve Police Officers Association”?

      “National Narcotic Officers Associations Coalition”?

      Why the hell would anybody want to donate to any of these? Somehow I get the impression that the fund solicitors are actually the police themselves.

    4. God, whenever I hear some high schooler or college student say they want to work at a non profit it drives me up the wall.

      1. Feeeeeeeelings… nothing more than feeeeeeelings…..

      2. My company is absolutely for profit. If I had to guess, I would say it’s made our owner a bit over a billionaire. And yet I am having trouble coming up with more than a couple nonprofits that have done more good (i.e. improved peoples lives somehow) than ours has via our software.

        1. Absent cronyism, profit is a direct measure of the value you’ve added to the world.

          1. I thought it was a direct measure of how evil and exploitative you have been.

            1. That’s how liberals justify their lack of talent and ambition.

          2. I dont think that holds.

            Lets take a hypothetical example.

            Company A sells 1000 widgets at a $10 per widget profit.
            Company B sells 1000 widgets at same quality & price as A, but makes $20 per widget profit.

            Company A provides value of $10000 + 1000 widgets
            Company B provides value of $20000 + 1000 widgets

            The extra profit is extra value provided to the world, but its an incomplete picture.

            1. So then company B must be more efficient, meaning it is using up fewer resources (raw materials, energy, or labor) from the world. Though I guess they could also just be smarter at purchasing their required components.

              I don’t think it’s a perfect 1:1 correlation, but generally more profit means more value to the world.

              1. I don’t think it’s a perfect 1:1 correlation, but generally more profit means more value to the world.

                I agree with that, my example has B being $10k more valuable.

                Its just the value of the service provided adds to the world too, not just the profit.

            2. Something about Company B’s process allowed them to profit more. Maybe they used fewer hours of labor or cheaper equipment/labor or something. That’s where the difference comes in. They used fewer resources to do the same job, so more value was added.

              1. They used fewer resources to do the same job, so more value was added.

                Can people not read?

                Of course its more value added, I fucking said that.

                $20k + 1000 widgets $10k + 1000 widgets

                Its not a “direct measure” though.

                1. I think it is a direct measure, though. Company B has twice the profits, so they added twice the value. At least it is the closest we can come to a direct measure given the subjective nature of “value”.

                  1. Expanding on my comment at 11:27:

                    Consider Company C that makes 1000 widgets at 0$ profit. They have added 0 value to world. Instead they have merely converted one thing of value into another.

                    1. Consider Company C that makes 1000 widgets at 0$ profit. They have added 0 value to world. Instead they have merely converted one thing of value into another.

                      False.

                      The purchaser got something they valued greater than their money, a widget.

                      If the widget cost them $10 and the consumer got $15 of value out of it, they company C added $15000 worth of value to the world.

                      THERE ARE TWO SIDES TO EVERY TRADE

                      You are leaving off the other side.

                    2. So using my consumer side example:

                      A had a total value added of $25k ($10k+$15k)
                      B had a total value added of $35k
                      C had a total value added of $15k

                      While the profit still represents part of the value added, whether it is a small part or a large part depends on the other side of the trade.

                    3. Reading robc beats Khan Academy any day.

                    4. While the profit still represents part of the value added, whether it is a small part or a large part depends on the other side of the trade.

                      I agree. I was always assuming that these companies were actually able to find buyers for their products at the given profit level and that the companies negotiated the highest price they could get for their product.

                      I never said that the profit measured in dollars was the whole value added, only that it was a direct measure of the value added. The total value added is twice the dollar profit if you assume that the two sides met in the middle when negotiating price.

                    5. You are leaving off the other side.

                      No, I’m assuming that, in a free market, parties meet at the middle when assessing value. If one side feels the other side is getting a better deal than they are they will raise their price. In reality Company C would not sell at 0 profit. They would raise their price. If their product could only sell at 0 profit, then they would know that they were adding no value to the world.

                    6. In reality Company C would not sell at 0 profit.

                      What if Company C is a non-profit org?

                      Or a startup who cant yet compete with A or B on efficiency?

                      In my assumption, Im assuming A B and C are all selling at the same price. As the product is basically a commodity, with no difference in quality, there is no pricing difference, so they have all selling at FMV. They just vary in their efficiency/cost control.

                    7. “Consider Company C that makes 1000 widgets at 0$ profit. They have added 0 value to world. Instead they have merely converted one thing of value into another.”

                      This can’t be serious. Let’s say that Company Z makes identical widgets via an identical process for identical cost but charges twice as much. Are we really to say that they “added more value” to the world?

                      If we look at the lesson of the broken windows fallacy it’s conceivable that they took value away since the purchaser has less money to buy other things he wanted. All that profit for the producer could be seen as wasted cost for the consumer. It all depends on your point of view.

                    8. We also don’t know what the company considers cost or profit. If I’m self-employed and I charge a flat $1,000 per hour for my labor I can reasonably say that my firm has made no profit (since all I bill are my labor “costs”), but (if I can get work at those rates) I’m doing just fine.

                    9. If I’m self-employed and I charge a flat $1,000 per hour for my labor I can reasonably say that my firm has made no profit…

                      Your firm has made no profit, but you have profited by $1000. That’s about half the value you add to the world per hour for each hour that you work at those rates. Your firm is just a go-between that adds no value (hence no profit).

                    10. You’re changing the definitions of cost and profit. If you want to say that the $1000 per hour I make is all profit for me, then you have to do the same for the labor costs for Company C – their workers all “profit” from their wages. And the workers, absent some sort of company store scheme, certainly do have more money than they started with. So it’s equally valid to say that Company C has generated profit, just not for the shareholders (assuming there are pure shareholders).

                    11. Are we really to say that they “added more value” to the world?

                      Company Z would not be able to sell those widgets at that price. If someone was willing to buy their product at that price, then there must be some other value in their product over the other companies that your aren’t considering. Maybe it’s something as simple as the value of time or convenience.

                    12. You can’t postulate a company that sells at zero profit and then accuse me of being unrealistic.

                    13. You can’t postulate a company that sells at zero profit and then accuse me of being unrealistic.

                      I wasn’t. I said that if someone was willing to buy from Z at a huge markup, then some other value must be added even though the product is identical to everyone else’s. I just said you have to consider all sides of the transaction.

                      I already agreed that the 0 profit company was unrealistic, so let me replace it with a 0.01$ per widget profit company. This company adds vanishingly small value to the world compared to the other companies. Happy now?

                    14. If what you’re saying is that achievable profit is a measure of the value that the customer places on the product above its cost of production and delivery, then I can get on board with that. But I absolutely disagree that it measures some sort of objective value to the world, because there is no such thing as objective value.

                    15. …because there is no such thing as objective value.

                      Agreed. Profit is the best measurement we have for value added though. There’s a fudge factor in there, but I think it is safe to say that if you make twice the profit, then you added twice the value. You can’t do this calculation with bartering, of course.

                    16. Profit is the best measurement we have for value added though

                      On one side only.

                      On the other side, we have to measure the benefit the consumer gained before we get total value added.

                      You continue to ignore that portion.

                      You are saying that a non-profit never adds value to the world, and that is bullshit.

                      I did the fucking math above, why is it so hard to understand?

                    17. rob’s grumpy today.

                      You REALLY want to twist your noodle, try intuitively understanding why the Radford POW camp is so amazing and generates wealth in a vacuum. I must have gone over it 10000 times and still feel as if I only “get it” just barely.

                    18. rob’s grumpy today.

                      You REALLY want to twist your noodle, try intuitively understanding why the Radford POW camp is so amazing and generates wealth in a vacuum. I must have gone over it 10000 times and still feel as if I only “get it” just barely.

                    19. SQUIIIRRRRRRLLLLLLLLLLLSSSSSSSS!!!!!

                      KHAAANNNN!!!!!!!

                2. It *is* a direct measure though.

              2. But, but, but…

                The evil extra profit goes to the faceless corporation where they use it to suppress minorities and exploit childrenz and eat baby seals and make people vote for republicans.

                A new tax must be created to punish both companies.

        2. Charities have their place, but I think it is absolutely true that far more good has been done for humanity through people trying to make money (greed if you like) and building successful companies than from all the altruism and charity ever. I know this is obvious to most people here, but it is amusing (or sad perhaps) to see some people’s reaction when I point that out.

        3. I’ve worked for several companies that were non-profits. Not that we weren’t trying really hard to make money….

      3. Hey they aren’t all bad, I had a friend who worked for 10 years at a non profit that trained high school kids how to build robots and then organized and ran robotics competitions for them, but then again who wouldn’t want a job where you get paid to play with Lego Mindstorms all day?

    5. How many of these orgs received stimulus money? Probably all of them…

  8. Happy Firday! Here is a video of Nancy Pelosi and Kathleen Sebelius singing (and gyrating) to ‘Stop! In the Name of Love!’

    http://www.cbsnews.com/video/watch/?id=50148866n

    You’re welcome!

    1. I felt a disturbance in the web, as if a million eyeballs were plucked from their sockets by their horrified owners who cried, “Never again shall we look upon such horror!”

      1. “They are lean and athirst!” he shrieked… “All the evil in the universe was concentrated in their lean, hungry bodies. Or had they bodies? I saw them only for a moment, I cannot be certain.”

    2. Evil girls just wanna have fun!

    3. (and gyrating) to

      Call it twerking. You know you want to.

    4. I can’t tell you exactly how much I hate you at this second for posting the link to that… exhibition.

      I hate myself for trying to watch that even more than I hate you.

      1. And you deserve your own hatred. He even told you what it was for gods sake. Or are yoy trying to numb your repulsion reponse via clockwork orange method?

        1. I swear this comment wan’t here when I started typing mine!

      2. He gave you a summary of what the video is about. It’s your own damn fault if you decide to watch it.

    5. Your public servants hard at work!

    6. I will not click on that link. That which is seen cannot be unseen.

      1. Damn right.

      2. I have never had a greater disincentive to click than that description right there.

  9. Senators Ron Wyden and Mark Udall would like a little more information about these supposed terrorist attacks halted only by the siphoning of massive amounts of personal information.

    What’s the Democrat species of a Wacko Bird?

    1. Somebody needs to be writing long thumb-suckers about the coming liberal-progressive split in the Democratic Party.

  10. Man calls Solihull police to complain about prostitute’s looks
    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-e…..m-22887138

    West Midlands Police said the man had claimed he met the woman in a hotel car park.

    “The caller claimed that the woman had made out she was better looking than she actually was and he wished to report her for breaching the Sale of Goods Act,” a spokesperson for the force said.

    “When he raised this issue with the woman concerned, she allegedly took his car keys, ran away from the car and threw them back at him, prompting him to call police.”

    1. The prostitute was British. What did he expect?

      1. Elizabeth Hurley?

  11. Obama’s choice for CIA No. 2 ran ‘Erotic Nights’ at bookstore

    more

    1. Why is this a bad thing?

    2. Thats as good of a way to find a man as any. At least her prospects could read.

    3. Who does No. 2 work for?

  12. Deputies: Fla. man stabs brother after fight over missing mac and cheese, spilled beer

    Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013…..z2WCAX08zH

    1. Well, if it was good Mac and Cheese.

      1. oxymoron. Mac ‘n Cheese can only ever be adequate, or bad.

        1. That’s a pretty unenlightened point of view. I’m guessing you don’t live in the south, or have never had lobster mac ‘n’ cheese.

          1. Yeah. I’ve made some pretty killer mac n cheese before. Maybe he’s unaware or unprocessed home cooked food?

          2. Or just never had actual homemade mac and cheese.

            1. Or we all just got trolled. I just realized his name is “DontShootMe”, so he probably knew what an incendiary remark he was making. Curses!

              1. Sorry, I’d rather have a good hamburger any day. My Mom made very good Mac ‘n Cheese, but at the end of the day, it’s cheese and pasta. I’d rather make my BBQ pulled chicken…

                1. This. It’s not just cheese and pasta, it’s a fucking side dish. This is why I don’t like thanksgiving or christmas dinner as much as most people. It’s all damn side dishes.

                  1. Turkey is a side dish?

                    1. I meant mostly side dishes. Except the one year when I was living in DC and my parents came to visit. Meat Medley.

                    2. Mmmm….Meat Medley

                      *Homer Simpson drool*

                    3. My son in law used to manage a restaurant that had ‘Pasta El Diablo’.

                      It was mac and cheese… from GOD!

                      A combination of quality cheeses(asiago, parmesan, that mexican white stuff) and spices. And it could be got with fajita beef, chicken, or shrimp. Sort of a mexitalian melange of deliciousness.

                      They’d serve it on one of those giant italian style pasta plates; I’d eat it until I hurt myself.

                2. Sorry, I’d rather have a good hamburger any day.

                  What about a mac ‘n’ cheese stuffed hamburger? Because I’ve done that before and it was AWESOME.

          3. ooh, spice up Mac ‘n Cheese with a gigantic insect that eats dead stuff on the ocean floor. Sign me up.

            1. gigantic delicious insect

              1. Some of the best Mac and Cheese I’ve had had pulled pork in it. Of course, this was in Chapel Hill and I have no chance of finding anything as good in the north.

            2. Wow, you must be an enjoyable dinner guest.

        2. I (used to) like Mac ‘n’ Cheese – three cheeses, some bacon and/or ham.

          Too many damn carbs though.

          1. I feel your pain…my mother in law’s homemade mac n’ cheese with ham….sigh.

        3. You are a monster!

    2. Florida Man is the worst supervillain ever. He’s always being arrested.

      1. I didn’t laugh out loud, because I don’t laugh out loud, but if I were the type of person to laugh out loud, I would have laughed out loud at this.

        1. I actually did laugh out loud. damn

  13. Lawsuit Filed To Prove Happy Birthday Is In The Public Domain; Demands Warner Pay Back Millions Of License Fees
    http://www.techdirt.com/articl…..main.shtml

    1. Is the author of the song even known?

      1. Patty and Millicent Hill

    2. Finally, some realistic birthday-themed episodes of tv shows will be shown on 2nd-tier cable stations.

  14. http://www.foxnews.com/opinion…..n-targets/

    The IRS long, sorry history of harassing political dissent. Unsurprisingly, one of the earliest proponents of using the IRS to go after critics of the government was LBJ.

    This whole thing is making the economic arguments against a VAT seem less convincing. Fuck it, close down the IRS and set up a VAT.

    1. I don’t like VATs but I think one would actually be better than the ridiculous, labyrinthine tax code we currently have.

      One of the first things we should do is find a way to simplify the tax code. That would stop things like this from happening.

      1. I can’t stand the VAT. But I am starting to think we have no other choice.

        1. The problem is that most VAT proponents want to add it on top of the current BS.

        2. Why not just a sales tax instead some crazy supply-chain nonsense.

          1. This. VAT is extraordinarily complicated and a mild nightmare for manufacturers.

            1. Is the flat tax proposal of a few years back a dead letter with libertarians? The VAT looks like a real nightmare.

              1. To me, a flat tax is vastly referable to a VAT. In addition to the implementation headaches of VAT, it leaves the door wide open for more engineering of the tax code by politicians.

                1. Your and my bug is a lot of people’s feature.

        3. I tend to agree. I’m in favor of a true post-card flat tax that includes capital gains and dividends. But we’ll simply never get there, as the need to audit the return won’t go away, and the incentive to tweak is enormous.

          But you’d need a repeal of the 16th to make a VAT truly palatable…and that will never happen either. We’re well and truly fucked.

        4. Not to sound like a broken record, but we always have the option of sending each state a bill in proportion to representation in Congress, and letting them figure out how to actually get the funds. Would introduce competition and laboratories of democracy and all, but it couldn’t become a race to the bottom (as the opposition might worry about) because they have a fixed target to raise.

          1. It would also mitigate complaints that residents of small states unfairly get more representation due to the Senate, since they will also be paying more taxes for the privilege.

      2. Any form of sales tax would be better than an income tax. Which would be easier to implement and enforce? A retail sales tax or a VAT? The VAT has to be collected at more sources, but might be harder to evade…

      3. You’ll have to repeal the 16th Amendment. Good luck with that.

        1. Why do you have to repeal it? I can think of numerous examples where the government ignores the other ones.

          1. You’d have to repeal it because if they can have an income tax, they will. It doesn’t require an income tax, but can you imagine a congress that could collect income tax but didn’t?

        2. “You’ll have to repeal the 16th Amendment”

          No you wouldn’t.

          The Congress shall have power to lay and collect taxes on incomes, from whatever source derived, without apportionment among the several States, and without regard to any census or enumeration.

          Nothing mandatory in it.

          1. You wouldn’t have to in any absolute sense. But practically, I think you would.

        3. Doesn’t seem too tough to repeal an Amendment. Apparently the 1st, 2nd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 9th and 10th were repealed a while back, judging from the news.

      4. I’d go with a VAT or sales tax or just about anything over an income tax of any kind. Even if the same level of taxation happened, those other taxes don’t require you to disclose your income and employment details to the government.

        1. Unless you’re running a business.

    2. Poll tax. Solves many problems at once.

      1. Poll tax

        What could be more equal than one man, one vote, one TAX?

        1. Exactly.

          We could even call it “your right to contribute to society”.

          1. How about ten thousand dollars per vote? Vote as often as you like, or not at all.

    3. But the IRS will never be closed down, and we will get a VAT plus an income tax.

    4. I wish what we’d get out of this is the “4th,5th & 16th amendment Clarification Act”.

      State that the 4th amendment prohibits withholding, because govmt needs a warrant to see your paycheck.

      Clarify that it’s perfectly legal to sign your tax form every year with “I plead the 5th”. And that that in no way provides any proof/suspicion/probable cause that you aren’t paying the income tax. Any cases where pleading the 5th does lead to extra attention will henceforth result in the CEA (constitional enforcment agency) investigating the people responsible, as individuals, for Federal Civil Rights violations.

      Clarify that while the 16th amendment does allow the income tax, it in no way authorizes an employment tax. Also clarify that the employee portion of the SS/Medicare/FICA is an income tax, and that is the only reason it is constitutional at all, but the employer portion is unconstitutional and therefore null and void, and therefore the “self employment” tax violates the equal protection clause of the 14th, and is therefore also null and void.

      1. The 4th and 5th amendments are already abundantly clear. Stop writing bills to clarify things that are already clear, and start indicting the officials who violate them.

  15. Pennsylvania police seek person who shot 550-pound bear out of season

    Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013…..z2WCAZUo4E

    What are the odds they catch the guy?

    1. I’d be pissed about that. I live in the woods and have a few hillbilly neighbors who I suspect are regular poachers of deer, turkey, and small game. It’s not that I believe they should respect the hunting license regime in PA, it’s that they are 1 screwing with the normal reproductive cycle of the animal populations and
      2 getting away with blatantly flouting the law for unknown reasons.

      These people have serious criminal tendencies including theft (running a chop shop at their compound) and arson. The police know it and claim to not be able to do anything about it and yet they spend all their time pulling people over for burned out taillights.

      1. Well duh. Armed hillbillies running a chop shop might decide to shoot it out rather then go to court.

        Some guy with a busted taillight will bitch and moan and pay the ticket.

        1. It’s all about officer safety.

      2. Anybody who kills more deer in PA is a hero.
        Death to Bambi!

        Deer are a plague and need to be exterminated to the point of extinction. Screwing up their reproduction cycle should be the plan.

        1. Man, when that deer raped you, the emotional damage was pretty severe.

          1. Deer have only raped my financially – thanks to the 2 car hoods they destroyed.

        2. But deer are delicious!

          I paid almost $30 a pound for my last one ($1000 deductible on my car).

          1. I’ll eat deer, but I would take cow over deer any day of the week. Some people say they like bear, too, but they’re fucking crazy.

        3. @crashland

          A-fucking-men!

          I live in pittsburgh and can see downtown from my house. My garden was recently decimated (literally as about 1/10 was destroyed) by fucking deer. If I were not in the city, I’d fucking shoot them on sight and not think twice about it. I don’t even know where these fucking things live, there’s no woods around here.

          1. +1 understanding what decimated means

        4. This is what happens when you exterminate the wolves and dont pick up their slack cause deer are “cute”

          1. in Town and Country, MO (wealthy liberals) they had a herd of over 500 deer…look on google maps at Town & Country, i will wait, Now, imagine 500 deer. And see all those limited access 4 lane roads with speeds of 60mph…yeah

            So anyway, they decided to “thin” the herd. Residents wanted catch and release in a rural area. First cost estimate was the city budget for a year. No shit. City said “Nahh, we’ll just shoot half and move half” nice compromise. Several bow hunters were tasked with crawling all over the city killing deer in peoples yards.

            funny.

      3. @db

        Isn’t it amazing that in small towns there are these families of criminals (most of them on ssi, “crazy checks”) that are always in trouble but never seem to go to jail.

        My dad had problems with a couple families like this that were his tenants. They stole and vandalized his property but the police just couldn’t do a thing about it gosh darnit. We were always reading in the paper about them being arrested for fraud, prescription forging, assault, shoplifting, etc but none of them ever spent more than a few days in jail. A couple of the kids finally went to jail when they were caught with a massive amount of heroin and cash.

        1. One of the neighbors referenced above is currently in prison for beating up his GF for about the twentieth time. Two years ago he was up on kidnapping charges but the abductee (his cousin) at the last minute refused to testify and the charges were dropped.

      4. You know who else hunted large mammals to extinction during a period of global warming?

  16. The supremes have cooked up a new regulation banning demonstrations on their turf.

    Constitutional experts.

    1. The Supremes must be using that power to create laws given to them in the Constitution

    2. They wanted to make sure Obama didn’t come down to where they work after Alito’s performance at the SOTU.

    3. Yeah, this is disappointing. Granted, protesting SCOTUS is pretty pointless, but its still the right of the people to protest.

    4. If they’re gonna screw up starting with the 1st Amendment, just impeach them all and shut down the Court for good.

  17. Senators Ron Wyden and Mark Udall would like a little more information about these supposed terrorist attacks halted only by the siphoning of massive amounts of personal information.

    Those senators must have been sleeping while they were being “fully briefed”.

  18. Love Red Meat?

    Ticks That Spread Red-Meat Allergy
    http://online.wsj.com/article/…..53308.html

    Odd as it seems, researchers say that bites from the voracious lone star tick are making some people allergic to red meat?even if they’ve never had a problem eating it before.

    1. I suspect genetic experimentation by crazed vegans.

      One day it’s very, VERY likely that some douchebag researcher somewhere will think he’s discovered an “empathy virus” or some such shit and will try to develop an animal vector to spread it.

      This is the kind of shit you worry about when you read too much science fiction.

      1. I see a future:

        Red Meat is Unhealthy, therefore we should stop people from eating it – using a drug taken from the saliva of a tick.

      2. Or maybe they could spray it out of airplanes and tell people it was just “condensation”.

        1. chemtrailxz!!!11

      3. Read White Plague by Frank Herbert. I’m quite certain that particular dystopia is in our future.

  19. Calif. teacher says school letting her go because of abusive ex-husband

    Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013…..z2WCAjHjHp

    Not sure what to think about this.

    1. I think she can let the lawsuits begin.

      1. AT WILL

        Suck it up.

        1. Are you really “At Will” if you are part of a collective bargaining agreement?

          Either way, she just won the lottery.

          1. Private school. Or are even private schools in CA unionized?

          2. She shouldn’t win shit. I don’t care if you get fired because your third cousin sneezed during the Man of Steel screening.

            AT WILL

            Suck it up.

            1. “Should” got nothing to do with it.

        2. DUE PROCESS.

          Learn what it means.

    2. Let her protect herself by carrying concealed at school.

    3. I think a private employer can decide to release someone for whatever reasons they want. They felt it was in their best interest to let her go. It sucks for her, but sometimes bad shit happens.

    4. It’s legal, but it shows how serious the Catholic church takes all its teachings.

      “Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.” — James 1:27

      Fuckers.

      1. Don’t think of it as a Catholic school, but rather a private school that caters to Catholics.

        That said, she can make an impassioned plea to the congregation and parents. As a parent, I’d be pretty pissed if a school fired my child’s (good) teacher because her ex-husband is an abusive douchebag who showed up on school property.

        We have security/police there for a reason.

    5. Its a private institute. If she’s a good teacher it’s their loss.

  20. $250 million should cover the first months bill but what about the other 11 months of the year?

    “”‘Sen. Barbara Boxer plans to push for Washington to provide $250 million and perhaps more to help local and state governments pay the cost of healthcare to uninsured immigrants who seek legal status under legislation now before the Senate.””‘

    http://www.latimes.com/news/po…..7718.story

  21. Friday Cunt-vs.-Cunt match-up is a good one this week:

    Ezra Klein explains that Barack Obama is a polymath of such a magnitude that he cannot even fathom the magnitude of his own genius:

    Obama Guesses His Way to Trillions in Health Savings

    And a reminder: Bill Clinton still in da house! He’s sending your boys to join hands with al-Qaeda for the liberation of Syria, just as our Founders intended:

    Bill Clinton Suggests Obama Risks Looking Like a “Wuss” and “Total Fool” on Syria

    1. You me’d the first link.

      1. +1

    2. First link looks SugarFree’d. Also, Ken Schultz disapproves.

      1. P.S. There might not be a “c” in Shultz. Sorry Ken :/

    3. Even without Obama’s oversimplification, the $2,500 target was extremely optimistic. So here’s the shocking revelation: The savings are actually materializing. Over e-mail, Cutler pointed out that in January 2009, the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services projected that national health spending would equal 19.3 percent of gross domestic product in 2016. Their 2012 projection cuts the 2016 estimate to 18.3 percent.

      *facepalm*

      1. Partisans on each side are projecting wild numbers in front of the midterms.

        Looks like only actual data will suffice.

  22. Poet puts testicles up for sale
    http://au.news.yahoo.com/thewe…..-for-sale/

    A Colombian poet and journalist has offered his testicles for sale to fund a trip to introduce Europeans to his work.

    Raffael Medina Brochero yesterday told Radio Caracol he would sell them to the first person to agree to pay 375 million pesos ($A209,049) so that he could travel to Europe.
    His testicles could be transplanted into a sterile person or used to make soup, said the 52-year-old poet, who has had 11 books published.

    uh….?

    1. How much for the whole package?

    2. What a wonderful metaphor for the modern American beta male.

    3. But how will he do a little dance without them?

      1. I am not clicking on that.

    4. How can he sell something that his wife already owns?

  23. The House voted to restrict (but not eliminate) the president’s power to indefinitely detain U.S. citizens.

    They could limit it to people on the NSA’s radar.

  24. Texas man says wife’s arrest for trying to frame him with ricin letters like a ‘bad dream’

    Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013…..z2WCBCllGU

    Weapons grade crazy.

    1. Don’t stick it in crazy?

      1. By male standards, all women are crazy – it’s just a matter of degree.

        1. This why there are no female libertar…

          Wait a minute, he’s telling the truth!

  25. While working for spies, Snowden was secretly prolific online
    http://www.reuters.com/article…..2320130614

    He was also a prolific commentator on technology forum Ars Technica, posting approximately 750 messages using the screen name “The True HOOHA” from late 2001 to 2012.

    1. That’s not prolific at all. That’s like one comment every five days.

      Why are reporters so retarded?

      1. Damn your nimble fingers!

    2. 1 message every 5 days? Prolific?

    3. Note to self: post more erudite comments on HampersandR in attempt to improve post-arrest profile stories.

      PS Note to self: acquire pole-dancing hot girlfriend for same.

    4. I think I have had DAYS when I posted 750 messages here.

      Take one atheism thread, add in a Zimmerman thread, maybe have MNG show up and argue that it’s moral to enslave doctors…BAM! 750 posts. Easy.

      1. Deep dish pizzas made from the foreskins of circumcised babies?

        1. OK, folks, we’re done here. Last one out catch the lights. See you Monday.

  26. Don’t shave squirrels because they look rather spooky

    1. Drat, I was hoping they finally had proof of the Jersey Devil!

    2. We need to have that shaved squirrel fight a shaved cat and tape it.

      It would be like the best alien effects shots ever recorded on film.

      “What are those things? They’re HORRIBLE!”

      1. That is one twisted thought….

        I approve.

      2. You’d be a youtube sensation, until PETA destroyed you with their sattelite of death.

  27. http://www.americanthinker.com…..i_bus.html

    Drones in Cincinnati not going quietly. Apparently, Lerhner knew that the information about IRS abuse was coming out. So her cunning plan was to plant a question about the abuse in Cincinnati figured they could blame it on one office.

    1. So this Lerner woman was too stupid to just offer a drone a golden parachute in exchange for claiming responsibility. Why did she think framing some flunky was a better idea?

      1. Because Lerner is a fanatic. I would bet anything she thought the people in the Cincinnati office would be proud to be one of the eggs broken for the cause.

      2. Apparently Lerner’s reputation at the FEC was one of an utter fanatical dogged determination to prove that her targets were guilty of wrongdoing, and that nothing any of her coworkers could say would divert her from her crusade.

        I suspect that she got away with it by being a bully, and that she could get away with it so long as there wasn’t a great deal of scrutiny on her actual actions.

        I think she is shocked, like a horse cavalry officer charging the first machine gun nest.

        1. like a horse cavalry officer charging the first machine gun nest.

          I hope her career is just as dead.

  28. This brightened my morning so I thought I would share it with y’all.

    Meet Jarad Dawkins, 11, and Malcom Brickhouse, 12, the middle schoolers behind the metal band Unlocking The Truth.

    http://www.buzzfeed.com/hnigat…..h-brooklyn

    1. Those kids can rock.

  29. Answering Michael Lind’s Question: Why Is No Country Libertarian?

    I have a question for Michael Lind: if losing weight is so great for your health, why are you such a fat ass?

    1. It is only important for the little people to follow the rules. Now excuse Mr. Lind, he has his late breakfast to attend to.

      1. By “late breakfast”, you mean the breakfast that he has between breakfast and lunch?

        1. Lind is a Hobbit?

      2. That’s called secondsies in hobbit talk.

        1. Damn, I need to refresh more.

        2. No no, it’s second breakfast, then elevensies.

          1. I just recalled that myself. Silly me trying to short change both second breakfast and elevensies by combining the two.

    2. Lind has posted two follow-ups thus far, and he calls out Will Wilkinson in one of them for rebutting him (Wilkinson, the not-libertarian). WW’s twitter responses: (1): “Jesus what an idiot” and (2): “This is one of those rare occasions when I feel justified in saying my interlocutor is either dumb or dishonest.”

      I’d say the intellectual discourse has devolved.

      I won’t post the links to the Lind articles, because at this point it’s basically just inane click-bait.

      1. And if you think the articles are bad, wait till you read the comments. The words “weapons-grade stupid” come to mind…

      2. Sometimes you just have to give up any pretense of propriety and call it like it is.

    3. I believe that’s game, set and match. Well done.

    4. Here’s another answer to Lind that I liked. Kinda rambly, but informative and epically correct.

      And yes, the real reason there have never been a libertarian country has something to do with Lind’s chins.

  30. Prison Library At Guantanamo
    http://www.nytimes.com/2013/06……html?_r=0

    David Remes, a lawyer for Guant?namo detainees, told me one client requested romance novels, while others have asked for skiing, surfing and mountain-climbing magazines, “because they never see nature.” His client Shaker Aamer, a former resident of Britain, took a liking to George Orwell. “I sent him a copy of ‘1984,’ and he said he read it about three times and that it perfectly captured the psychological reality of being at Gitmo,” Remes said.

    Books are screened out if they include too much profanity, anti-American or extremist themes, or “too much sex and violence,” Milton said. Still, “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo” made it through the filter.

    1. What could be more anti-American than 1984?

      Orwell clearly wrote it as a critique of the Obama administration.

      1. We’ll know for certain when an anti-Obama movie comes out like the anti-Bush movie about modern fascism (V for Vendetta) did 10 years ago.

    2. or “too much sex and violence,” Milton said. Still, “The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo” made it through the filter

      Uh…someone is not filtering very well.

  31. Jury urged to convict Detroit police officer in death of girl, 7

    Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013…..z2WCBMgqUV

    It would be nice for a cop to face some consequences for once.

    1. Weekley, a member of an elite police unit, is accused of failing to control his gun.

      Those guns are like wild animals. Only specially trained public heroes can keep them under control and even then, they shoot sleeping children of their own volition.

      1. Maybe he should have tasered it?

        1. I paid the $10 by the way.

          1. Good on ya. If the Hawks win the Cup, it will be twice in my lifetime..or, two times more than I expected to ever see.

  32. http://boingboing.net/2013/06/…..um=twitter

    FBI’s use of Patriot Act to collect information on US citizens has increased 1000 percent under Obama. That is right, ten times. I guess Tony and Shreek are right when they say this is totally different than what happened under Bush.

    1. Whatever. That article is from the notorious right-wing teabagger christfag site, boingboing. They’ve been sucking BOOSH’s cock for years.

      1. And they are quoting that right wing rag Newsweek. Those clowns have been sucking neocon cock for decades.

        1. Novak and Will – two neocon stalwarts at Newsweek.

          1. And that certainly makes it okay for Obama to use the Patriot Act 10 times more than Bush.

          2. And, right on cue.

          3. Two of…how many?

      2. Thanks for that, now I have to go get paper towels to clean up, and refill my coffee cup.

      3. They’ve definitely got a government cock lodged in their craw.

    2. The big new massive NSA database went into production in 2008.

      The old one ran on Excel.

        1. and…?

          BOOOSH!!1111!!CHRISTFAGS!!111111!!

          1. thanks for clearing that up.

      1. Only the FBI is that technologically illiterate. The NSA uses Macs.

      2. Except Excel is a spreadsheet, not a database. Sure, you can do rudimentary db work in Excel, but it’s not a robust database management app.

  33. Jonah Goldberg: Freedom: The Unfolding Revolution
    The libertarian idea is the only truly new political idea in the last couple thousand years.
    http://www.nationalreview.com/…..h-goldberg

    Lind sees it differently. “If socialism is discredited by the failure of communist regimes in the real world, why isn’t libertarianism discredited by the absence of any libertarian regimes in the real world? Communism was tried and failed. Libertarianism has never even been tried.”

    What an odd standard. You know what else is a complete failure? Time travel. After all, it’s never succeeded anywhere!

    What’s so striking about the Lind standard is how thoroughly conservative it is.

    Pick a date in the past, and you can imagine someone asking similar questions. “Why should women have equal rights?” some court intellectual surely asked. “Show me anywhere in the world where that has been tried.” Before that, “Give the peasants the right to vote? Unheard of!”

    1. Goldberg is a very sharp writer. And my God Lind is an embarrassment.

      1. You know who’s more of an embarrassment? The idiots who decide to publish him.

        1. You know who’s more of an embarrassment than the idiots who publish him? The idiots who read him.

          1. It is idiots all the way down.

    2. But has giving woman equal rights or peasant the right to vote been successful? I guess it depends on what you consider to be success.

      1. OK, back that up to “Men other than landowners having the right to vote? Where has that ever been tried?”

    3. ” Sweden’s social democracy is all right, but if it were perfect, I suspect fewer cars would be on fire over there.”

      nice.

    4. I’m actually not a full-blown libertarian myself

      Hand back the decoder ring.

      1. [comment only available to reason Premium subscribers]

        1. “Be sure to drink your ovaltine.”

          1. +1 Radio Serial

    5. Good point Goldberg made with stating that the concept of an all-powerful central authority is downright backwards.

      A nice contrast from this shit I read yesterday: http://www.nationalreview.com/…..c-mccarthy

    6. This from the comments:

      The main defect of libertarianism is it can only work in a land of moist robots.

      1. Is the commenter’s handle NEW SOVIET MAN?

      2. Don’t forget the token Somalia comment(!):

        “Well, seems Somalia is as libertarian as you can get.

        Almost no government, and every man is his own sovereign, typically exercising what one might call their “2nd Amendment rights”.”

        1. Almost no government, and every man is his own sovereign, typically exercising what one might call their “2nd Amendment rights

          I assume that there are fewer guns as a percentage of the population in Somalia than in America. Most people in Somalia wouldn’t be able to afford guns.

          1. Almost no government, and every man is his own sovereign, typically exercising what one might call their “2nd Amendment rights.

            They don’t have one government, they have many government in the form of their multiple tribes and clans to whom they owe their obedience. But I suppose they should strictly adhere to the artificial boundaries foisted on them by the British and Italians if they want to be a “real” nation.

      3. tender and moist robots with a little garlic sauce on the side.

        1. Oh, tropical robots
          When you come of age
          You’ll reach the sun
          And when you go away
          You won’t come back no more

      4. The comments are too tiresome even for me.

        Liberaltarianism is a fad, an ideological gloss to cover the self absorbtion and disdain for others made fashionable by Ayn Rand. There has never been a libertarian society? Go visit the inner city in any large metropolitan area in the US. No restrictions on drugs or sex, marriage becoming a distant memory. Libertarian societies are all around us.

        This man sounds fat.

        1. MORAL DECAY! MORAL DECAY! SOMALIA SOMALIA SOMALIA!RABBLERABBLERABBLERABBLE

        2. Go visit the inner city in any large metropolitan area in the US. No restrictions on drugs or sex, marriage becoming a distant memory.

          Wait, there are no drug laws in the inner cities? Man, all of those cops busting down doors in no-knock raids must feel awfully silly for enforcing non-existent laws.

          1. Not only are there no drug laws, there aren’t any licensing laws either. You can start a plumbing business in Queens with a lot less red tape than Bellows Falls Vermont.

          2. I’m always amazed when people tell me I’m secretly living in a libertarian paradise and just don’t know it.

            1. Do you hear the cops throwing people in jail for months to a year because of drug possession? Do you hear them putting pot advocates’ kids in foster care for their “safety”?

              Do you hear it?

              That’s the sound of LIBERTARIAN PARADISE, my friend.

        3. This one makes my head hurt:

          The problem with the libertarian idea is that most self-described libertarians are complete kooks who are incapable of using any judgment. Thus, they advocate anarchy rather than a space in which civilized people can live with some comfort and security and a large sphere of freedom in which to make their own choices of what kind of lives to live. And they advocate policies (or “non-policies”) that even they admit are unworkable under present circumstances but wave away problematical present circumstances with a grand sweep of their hand, even though there is no path to get from here to there.

          A great example of flawed libertarian thinking is opposition to any effort — such as requiring insurance — to handle the Emergency Room free-rider problem. Libertarians typically say that we should let sick or injured people die in the streets if they have not made provisions for their care. I am not entirely hostile to this libertarian idea EXCEPT for one thing: We are not going to let people die in the streets in this country. Libertarians typically get hostile at this point and angrily insist that they ~should~ be allowed to die…it was their choice.

          1. Cont…

            But harsh, brittle, strident beliefs of libertarians in such a matter are just not persuasive to anything like a majority of their fellow citizens. So if libertarian zeal does knock down the new insurance requirement — and it might — we will just continue with the unlibertarian practice of making everyone else pay for the free riders. But fervent libertarians are shrill, and they just refuse to get down to the nuts and bolts of reality. They are just full of “shoulds”…how things ~should~ be.

          2. The libertarian strawman in full swing.

          3. A great example of flawed libertarian thinking is opposition to any effort — such as requiring insurance — to handle the Emergency Room free-rider problem. Libertarians typically say that we should let sick or injured people die in the streets if they have not made provisions for their care.

            When has anyone said this?

            1. When has anyone said this?

              I’m sure more than a few of us have said it sarcastically and fuckwits like the guy you quoted were mendacious or stupid enough to then portray it as an actual libertarian view.

    7. These “waves of the future” were simply gussied-up tribalisms, anachronisms made gaudy with the trappings of modernity, like a gibbon in a spacesuit.

      That’s the Simile Of The Month right there.

      1. I like this line too

        In the old Soviet Union, Mao’s China, Pol Pot’s Cambodia, and today’s North Korea, they tried to move toward the ideal Communist system. Combined, they killed about 100 million of their own people. That’s a hefty moral distinction right there: When freedom-lovers move society toward their ideal, mistakes may be made, but people tend to flourish. When the hard Left is given free rein, millions are murdered and enslaved. Which ideal would you like to move toward?

        1. Which ideal would you like to move toward?

          Why, the ones with the best intentions of course, that’s all that matters.

  34. Rand Paul tells Evangelicals: “there is a War on Christianity”

    http://blogs.cbn.com/thebrodyf…..ar-on.aspx

    Ralph Nader asks the important questions: “Has There Been a Bigger Con Man in the White House Than Barack Obama?’

    http://newsbusters.org/blogs/n…..rack-obama

    1. Maybe Sen. Paul thinks that’s what he has to do to get evangelicals to listen, but I wish he’d decide what he really believes and try to appear consistent about it.

      1. He will wind up sounding like Santorum by the first primary debate.

        1. CHRISTFAGS!!11!!!!

        2. You will wind up smelling like santorum by the first primary debate.

          1. You will wind up smelling like santorum by the first primary debate.

            ::spit take::

    2. That speech is brilliant if you actually read it.

      And you guys know how I feel about Christianity.

      Basically the entire speech is anti foreign aid. It’s also anti war on terror.

      But the mechanism Rand has chosen to use to argue against it is “our allies in the war on terror kill people for being Christian”.

      He knows that on the GOP side the war on terror relies on an alliance between national security conservatives and the religious right.

      The weak point in that alliance is the pretty simple, obvious, an unrebuttable fact that the national security conservatives are bankrolling people who kill you for being a Christian, if you do it at the wrong place, at the wrong time, in the wrong way.

      1. unrebuttable fact that the national security conservatives are bankrolling people who kill you for being a Christian, if you do it at the wrong place, at the wrong time, in the wrong way.

        That is true. But it is not just conservatives who do this. Obama and the Democrats love giving money to those very same people. They are all basically Godless fucks who view the wiping out of Christians in the middle east as either a mildly regrettable consequence of necessary action or actively view it as a good thing.

        1. I very much doubt any of them actively support it. Most democrats are Christians too. But they certainly don’t seem to take it into account when deciding who to support.

      2. Is there any reason to suppose Rand Paul is being insincere about his Christian views, simply because his application of Christianity is different from that of some statist knob-gobbler?

        1. No, I think he’s probably fairly sincere.

          I just find it amusing that when he decides to wave a Bible in the air, he finds a way to do it that’s secretly an anti foreign aid argument.

          In much the same way that his dad used to disguise federalism arguments as his obligatory Bible hand-wave to the socons.

      3. It is true that the net result of all our foreign adventurism in the last 20 years has been the installation of new Islamic republics, regardless of administration.

  35. Commander of SS-led unit living in US
    http://apnews.myway.com/articl…..ETCO2.html

    Michael Karkoc, 94, told American authorities in 1949 that he had performed no military service during World War II, concealing his work as an officer and founding member of the SS-led Ukrainian Self Defense Legion and later as an officer in the SS Galician Division, according to records obtained by the AP through a Freedom of Information Act request. The Galician Division and a Ukrainian nationalist organization he served in were both on a secret American government blacklist of organizations whose members were forbidden from entering the United States at the time.

    Though records do not show that Karkoc had a direct hand in war crimes, statements from men in his unit and other documentation confirm the Ukrainian company he commanded massacred civilians, and suggest that Karkoc was at the scene of these atrocities as the company leader. Nazi SS files say he and his unit were also involved in the 1944 Warsaw Uprising, in which the Nazis brutally suppressed a Polish rebellion against German occupation.

    1. I hate Minnesota Nazis.

    2. Better hurry up and arrest the remaining Nazis, or God will get to them before we do.

  36. Great idea!

    I like the quotes from the parents that are against it. Way to go, you just proved it works.

    1. If I still lived in the area, I’d go there all the time. I’m a big supporter of child free zones. My wife and I made the decision to not have children because we don’t like them. It would be nice to be able to go to a restaurant where we know we won’t be annoyed by unruly children.

      1. Not only does it keep out children but it keeps out the adults that think it’s ok to take their small children wherever they want. I have a one year old son, I think he very well behaved and does well when we take him out with us. That being said, as a parent you have to know that some places it’s not ok to take your kids. Going out for wings-great. Going out to an intimate sushi bar-not so much.

        1. I don’t mind having kids around while I eat. As long as they behave properly in public. I understand kids have to eat and parents don’t always want to cook, but is it too much to ask that they keep them from being obnoxious? I can’t count the number of times I’ve had kids run past me or just walk up to my table because they were bored or weren’t getting enough attention.

    2. I’m surprised more restaurants don’t try this. Nothing spoils a nice relaxed dinner more than out of control kids and crying babies.

      1. Too many parents they are afraid to piss off.

      2. Holy shit, babies cry? Who could have expected such a thing?

      3. The restaurant in the article bans kids under 18. I know that children don’t mature as quickly as they used to, but still, the avg. 16 yo isn’t going to be crying and soiling diapers – not in a restaurant anyway.

        SLD, etc.

        1. For an intimate sushi bar like that it makes more sense. The average 16 year old isn’t going to be crying and soiling diapers, but they still have very little impulse control and tend to be egocentric. A raucous group of teenagers isn’t a big deal in a noisy, busy restaurant like Denny’s. However, it is annoying when you go to a more upscale place and there is a group of teenagers acting like, well, teenagers.

          I think a good mix for upscale places could be to ban small children and have a strict policy of kicking out anyone who doesn’t understand the concept of “indoor voice”. At least that’s how I’d do it.

          1. We have a pair of Chinese restaurants owned by the same group. One is between the U and the hospital and fills up with sorostitutes and their 20 something ilk. The other is out east but in town and fills up with families. Guess which one is easier to have a quiet dinner in.

            Ooh. I’m taking the gf there tonight. Its mandatory date night.

            1. Oh I bet it’s the one with the families. Attention whores like to draw attention to themselves, usually loudly. If you want to be a WOO girl, go to a bar. That’s why I wish there were places that kicked out obnoxious people. I expect crowds, loud people, children, etc at most places, but when I want to have a quiet dinner with my wife it would be really nice to have a few choices where I’m guaranteed that there will be no obnoxious teenagers or random screeching children.

  37. U.S. Agencies Said to Swap Data With Thousands of Firms
    http://www.bloomberg.com/news/…..firms.html

    Many of these same Internet and telecommunications companies voluntarily provide U.S. intelligence organizations with additional data, such as equipment specifications, that don’t involve private communications of their customers, the four people said.

    Makers of hardware and software, banks, Internet security providers, satellite telecommunications companies and many other companies also participate in the government programs. In some cases, the information gathered may be used not just to defend the nation but to help infiltrate computers of its adversaries.

    it’s hacking all the way down.

    1. You’re missing the point, we need net neutrality to solve these problems.

  38. NSA revelations, modified wheat cast a pall on U.S. trade talks with Europe
    http://www.washingtonpost.com/…..story.html

    Chances for a broad trade deal between the United States and the European Union are fading following recent revelations about U.S. electronic surveillance programs, oversight of genetically modified food and other issues, according to officials and analysts in the United States and Europe who are following the discussions.

    European officials are set to meet in Brussels on Friday to debate a formal mandate for their negotiating team, and analysts who have reviewed the draft text say it points toward a more limited agreement rather than the expansive economic opening that officials said could unleash tens of billions of dollars in additional trade.

  39. The two [regulatory requirements] directly at issue here compel the company to (1) affix a placard on each truck with a phone number for reporting environmental or safety concerns (You’ve seen the type: “How am I driving? 213-867-5309”) and (2) submit a plan listing off-street parking locations for each truck when not in service.

    From Elana Kegan’s unanimous opinion in a fairly innocuous trucking case the Court released yesterday. Was it her clerk who did that and Kegan didn’t notice or does Kegan have human like qualities?

    1. Clerk. For something like that, SCOTUS justices cannot be bothered.

      1. It tickles me that my post-First Year law school son is writing opinions for the Common Pleas Court where he’s interning. I know the stuff is well-vetted, and I’d certainly trust my son more than the judge he’s working for, but, still, it amuses me.

        1. I’m willing to bet your son pays more attention to whats going on in the court room than the judge.

    2. I’m thinking of changing my name to Per Curiam so when I write opinions . . .

    3. “(You’ve seen the type: “How am I driving? 213-867-5309″)”

      I seen your number on your U-Haul
      To complain, about my driving call
      867-5309 (repeat)

      Baby, I got your number
      You’ll wish you’d never cut me off
      I’ll call your supervisor
      I’ve just about had enough
      (CHORUS)

  40. Mali manual suggests al-Qaida has feared weapon
    http://news.yahoo.com/mali-man…..58976.html

    The photocopies of the manual lay in heaps on the floor, in stacks that scaled one wall, like Xeroxed, stapled handouts for a class.

    Except that the students in this case were al-Qaida fighters in Mali. And the manual was a detailed guide, with diagrams and photographs, on how to use a weapon that particularly concerns the United States: A surface-to-air missile capable of taking down a commercial airplane.

    1. There are so many shoulder fired missiles left over from the cold war. There were thousands of them laying around Iraq. It took months to collect all of them. Saddam had ammunition dumps like you wouldn’t believe. I find it hard to believe that at least some of them didn’t end up in the wrong hands.

      1. Yes, but how reliable are they?

        I think IR seekers need to be stored in a temperature controlled environment or they stop working.

        1. I don’t know. That is a good point.

          1. Sure, but they really only need one to work.

          2. Yeah they’re not exactly an AK. Pretty sure most, if not all, will be useless.

            Like all the fretting about the possibility of 80s era Stingers being used against US troops in Afghanistan. No way they lasted that long in usable condition. Batteries die, the seekers get messed up, the propellant degrades.

            1. To my knowledge there has never been a case of a shoulder fired missile taking down a US aircraft in Afghanistan or Iraq. RPGs have taken down a lot of helicopters. But I don’t think there have been any shoulder fired missiles. You would think if the things worked, they would have used a few in Afghanistan or Iraq first.

            2. And even if one were in perfect working condition, the user would have to know to arm the warhead separately from the rocket.

          3. I don’t know either.

            I think the modern ones can be stored in more extreme environments, but the seeker has to be cooled prior to firing, and you need weird chemicals to use as the refrigerant.

            1. Yeah, somehow I suspect some AQ missileer won’t be “hearing the tone” any time soon.

              1. And even given all that, suppose they do take down one airliner. Meh. (And I say that as someone who flies all the time.)

                1. Why would they need missiles anyway? AR-15s are powerful enough to shoot down airplanes and blow up trains.

        2. Given that airliners do not carry countermeasures or engage in evasive maneuvers or fly particularly fast on takeoff/landing it probably wouldn’t be that hard to hit one with a unguided rocket

          1. Hit a moving target going 200 mph from anywhere from a thousand feet to a mile? I think it would be harder than you think.

    2. I see Halbech’s hand in all this.

  41. Yay, Florida!

    Git outta my way, Old Farts!

    http://articles.orlandosentine…..uction-act

    Suck it, you other 56 States!

    1. Of course, Florida already had a couple of laws on the books to force slowpokes out of the fast lane, including a fine of $60 for offenders.

      Fucking enforce the laws already on the books instead of adding to the regulatory and bureaucratic scheme, jeez! While I’m happy to see that slow drivers will be punished (vindication!), this is a retarded law and even more retarded story because it has always been “against the law” to be driving in the passing lane when not passing anyone.

      When cops and bureaucrats have a way to actually make traffic flow better and safer, they do nothing. When something they want to do is proven not to work (ticket speeders), they do it to the max.

      1. Ticketing speeders works just fine. It brings lots of revenue into the treasury every year.

    2. Having driven in 47 of our great 56, I’d maintain that driving in Florida is the worst. Everyone is driving either 20 mph over the limit or 20 mph under, and all doing it on the same highway.

      1. As a native Floridian, I’d have to disagree. Indiana is the worst.

        1. If someone is going exactly the wrong speed in FL, chances are they have GA plates.

    3. Reminds me of the old Houston joke:

      Guy is doing 80 in the left lane, gets pulled over by a cop. Cop approaches his window and says, “Sir, I’m going to have to ticket you for impeding the flow of traffic.”
      Guy says, “But officer, I was doing 80!”
      Cop says, “Have it your way, I’ll write you a ticket for speeding, too.”

  42. Czech police from the organized crime unit raided the offices of a close aide to the prime minister and seized documents, sparking calls for the PM to resign. Hey, how come they can do that and we can’t?

    Corruption in the Czech republic? This is my shocked face.

  43. Leaving aside the mechanics of the data gathering, the most offensive part our new “all surveillance, all the time” program to me is the fucking gag orders which accompany the “warrants”.

    “Investigations” completely shielded from disclosure and review are not due process.

    Our rush toward banana republic autocracy continues.

  44. http://dailycaller.com/2013/06…..ui-factor/

    Apparently one of the big hold ups on the immigration bill is that its supporters privately are insisting that amnesty be granted to people with DUI convictions. Now, that in itself doesn’t bother me. I think DUI is way over enforced in this country. Except, I can’t think of a single other instance where politicians will so much as lift a finger for anyone ever convicted for a DUI. Yet, somehow if it involves illegal aliens DUIs are just no big deal. The rest of us can go get fucked if we happen to get caught in a road block and blow a .09. But illegal aliens, they are just fine.

    This more than anything is why the open borders crowd piss me off so much. For most of them, this has nothing to do with freedom or anything except tribal politics and getting their tribe special treatment.

    1. My problem is that they’ve proposed absolutely nothing to make it easier for an unmarried eastern European girl to come visit without going through the farce of the “fiance visa.” We should apply Brazil’s policy of strict reciprocity.

      1. That is because it is all about giving special status to Mexicans and Irish. It is total tribal politics and nothing else.

        1. What about Bernardo O’Higgins?

    2. I support open borders but oppose amnesty.

      Go home and then reenter correctly.

      1. Exactly – we need more Ellis Island style entries.

        Shots, health screen, check for warrants… here is your paper/card/whatever…NEXT IN LINE, PLEASE.

        1. Maybe France will give us two more statues, one for San Diego and one for McAllen.

        2. check for warrants
          If you’ve got one in the home country, please step over to the refugee line to plead your case.

          1. Ah, yes, correction accepted.

    3. good point.

  45. So with the Myriad Genetics case, Myriad can still patent its own tests, right, just not the human genes involved? That seems reasonable, as I’d expect a unanimous opinion written by Justice Thomas to be.

  46. If only my law school exams had been like this:

    The question posits a familiar student scenario in which a female student tricks one man into getting gobbled by another man, bums a second man with a bottle and rips off a third’s pubic hair, resulting in an infection and untimely death.

    1. “Familiar”?

      1. You know how those schools in Oz are…

      2. What, that’s never happened to you? That’s a typical Saturday night for some people around here:

        The question posits a familiar student H&R commentariat scenario in which a female student Warty tricks one man SugarFree into getting gobbled by another man Epi, bums a second man FoE with a bottle and rips off a third’s Pro L’s pubic hair, resulting in an infection and untimely death.

        1. just another day at H&R

        2. It ain’t gay if you’re not catching.

        3. Pro Lib is too old for death to be “untimely”, unless by “untimely” you mean “millennia overdue”.

          Also, I thought Warty’s MO was brute force, not trickery.

          1. Usually, but he likes to change it up every once in a while to keep his victims “comcubines” guessing.

            1. *”concubines”* Shit, talk about your all time freudian slips.

              1. It wouldn’t slip if you had EDIT BUTTON.

        4. +1 monocle!

  47. The FBI is officially digging into the surveillance problem ? that is, what to do about Edward Snowden letting everybody know we’re being spied upon by Big Brother.

    “The problem is not what we’re doing. The problem is that somebody tipped off the peasants.”

    1. Look, now we (Congress and the administration) are at greater risk from the enemy (the American public), who we have already seen changing tactcs in response to this leak (posting less useful evidence for the IRS on Facebook, encrpyting emails, etc.)

  48. Black family progress has stalled since controversial 1965 study, report says
    http://www.mcclatchydc.com/201…..alled.html

    Many of the same social problems highlighted in a landmark 1965 study on black family structure have only worsened over the last 48 years and are now causing similar hardship for white and Hispanic families.

    That’s a major finding of a new report by the Urban Institute, a liberal think tank, which re-examines the circumstances of black families nearly five decades after former Sen. Daniel Patrick Moynihan authored the controversial report, “The Negro Family: The Case for National Action.”

    need MORE WELFARE STATE!

    1. It was just bad luck. Welfare, unions destroying the schools, the drug war sending millions of men to prison and paying young women to have children out of wedlock had nothing to do with this.

      It is really sad. The government really is out to get black people. Just not in the way most black people think they are.

      1. I just wonder if the consequences of these policies are unintended or totally planned.

        Given LBJ’s comment about having them vote democrat for next 200 years, I’m leaning toward planned.

        1. How dare you suggest that TEAM Blue had anything but the best of intentions towards black people! Sure they corraled black people into these pigeon coops called federal housing projects, made welfare easy to get into but hard to get out of, forced black people out of their traditional neighborhoods in the name of urban renewal, created an entire generation of unemployable black men via the drug war and the credentialist, human resources system of employment we have to today, but don’t you dare suggest that TEAM Blue doesn’t love the black man.

          1. And all this after being the party of slavery, Jim Crow, and segregation…..

    2. Many of the same social problems highlighted in a landmark 1965 study on black family structure have only worsened over the last 48 years and are now causing similar hardship for white and Hispanic families.

      Leftists spend 50 years criticizing and undermining the cultural structures that kept even poor black families relatively stable, then act shocked that the dysfunctions they enabled has subsequently made things harder for all races in the US.

  49. http://online.wsj.com/article/…..TopOpinion

    Best of the Web yesterday on the organization in California, formed by a corporation to promote Obamacare. Amazingly, its tax exempt status went right through.

    1. Taranto called it – they’re rich enough to know the rules of nonprofit advocacy, so they get to cock-tease all the way over to the line of partisanship without crossing that line.

    1. So who is claiming evolutionary socio-biology is garbage science? SugarFree, or the author of the article?

      1. Feminists deride evo-psych and evo-socio on a regular basis. I am therefore claiming it sarcastically.

        1. Evo psych is such mushy crap, I am really surprised feminists haven’t embraced it. It would be so easy to make up a narrative using evolution to blame all of the world’s ills on men. They are missing an opportunity.

    2. Uh I thought menopause happened because women have a finite number of eggs.

    3. a group of Canadian researchers used computer models to show that menopause is an unintended outcome of natural selection

      Computer models? Well then, TEH SCIENCE IZ SETTLED!!!11!!!!111!!

      1. How about, “all outcomes of natural selection are unintended.”

  50. The House voted to restrict (but not eliminate) the president’s power to indefinitely detain U.S. citizens.

    In other words, they voted to allow the President to subject U.S. citizens to legal proceedings that are neither speedy nor public.

  51. INFINITY BARF!

    Now You Will Be Able to Smell ‘Here Comes Honey Boo Boo’

    “You’ve seen them. You’ve heard them. Now you will smell them,” promises a TLC press release for the upcoming second season of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo. The network will be hosting a “Watch ‘n Sniff” event for the season premiere on July 17 by distributing scent cards in issues of People, Us, through Time Warner Cable, and handed out personally by street teams (those poor interns) in major markets.

    The cards will have six different scents that will correlate to the premiere episode so that “viewers will be able to watch the show, scratch their cards and redneckognize the aromas associated with the Boo Boo gang as they welcome the sights, sounds and smells of summer.” As a reminder (in case you might have somehow forgotten) farts are featured heavily in every episode.

    1. What are the six smells? Obviously “fart” is one. Stale tobacco? Southern summer crotch sweat? Cheese breath? Yeast infection? Hot dog chili?

    2. Who the fuck would want to participate in this?

      1. low information voters?

      2. Canada as a whole

      3. Wait a minute, are you godwinning the thread?

    3. The cards will have six different scents that will correlate to the premiere episode so that “viewers will be able to watch the show, scratch their cards and redneckognize the aromas associated with the Boo Boo gang as they welcome the sights, sounds and smells of summer.”

      1) Fart
      2) Fromunda cheese
      3) Budweiser
      4) Tobacco spit
      5) Stale crotch sweat
      6) Road kill possum decaying in the hot sun

      1. Even calling them “rednecks” is flattering them–they’re really just white trash. A redneck is someone that actually works hard in the sun all day. These blobs do nothing but sit around all day and collect welfare and child support checks.

        1. Yes, it’s kind of a scandal that people should be mocked for something associated with hard work. It’s job-based snobbery, implying that these folks are dumb because they don’t work in an office drawing up org charts and filling out TPS reports all day.

          1. Actually, that’s a false association. Rednecks were originally named for WV cola miners to be able to distinguish themselves from the military men sent to kill them for uprising against coal companies.

            They wore red bandanas around their necks, and were called rednecks.

            1. I thought it come from the Afrikaans word rooinek, a Boer insult upon the pasty-skinned English who were flooding into the veldt in the early 19th century.

  52. Pair of Boston parking spaces fetch $560,000 at IRS auction. Does anyone want to get together to build an exclusive parking garage and auction off the spots?

    1. I have always believed that the best investment in Boston is parking.

      1. This seriously sounds like it could be a very good investment, if you could find some cheaper buildings to buy and tear down.

      2. Because it’s illegal to create any new spaces.

        1. If you build new housing, it’s actually required that you have some minimum portion of the space dedicated to parking.

          1. Right, but you can’t build parking LOTS.

            Since any spaces constructed in conjunction with new housing are offset by the new housing, that means that the net amount of available parking in Boston can only ever ratchet one way.

            1. Really? So the (admittedly few) parking garages around just predate the law?

              1. Yes.

                The EPA made Boston enter in a consent agreement to enforce the Clean Air Act that prohibits the construction of new parking garages.

                It’s supposed to encourage people to use mass transit.

                1. It’s a free country!

                2. Maybe having mass transit go further outside the city and run later than 12:30 AM would encourage people to use it more.

  53. To learn how to do it to journalists, presumably.

    I LOL’d. That’s some classic Tuccille.

  54. Holy shit, only 3 Democrats voted to restrict the President’s power to indefinitely detain Americans.

    1. Duh, the President is a Democrat. Why would we restrict a Democrat? Do you hate women, you monster?

  55. Quote of the morning

    One former Republican Justice Department political appointee tells PJ Media, “These quotes show America what anyone who ever worked with Gonzales has known for years: he is a moron.”

    http://pjmedia.com/tatler/2013…..ds-holder/

    1. Another interesting tidbit from that

      One former Hill staffer reported to Tatler that:

      John Ashcroft had essentially been cut out of the loop and Gonzales’ White House Counsel folks were actually in charge of writing and negotiating the Patriot Act. But then it turned out Ashcroft himself evidently did not support much of the Patriot Act ? and for sure not Gonzales’ interpretation of it, at least not at Ashcroft’s hospital bed side. Once Gonzales became AG when the Patriot Act was reauthorized, Gonzales ran the reauthorization from Justice and made the law worse.

      I do know this for a fact, it was OLC who completely fucked up the interpretation of the GCs in 2001 and gave us GUITMO. They were the ones who said that we couldn’t run Article 5 tribunals and that subjecting terrorists to them was somehow granting them GC rights.

  56. http://www.guardian.co.uk/worl…..ni=Network front:network-front aux-1 top-stories-1:Bento box 8 col:Position1

    “He described how Khalid al-Midhar, one of the 9-11 hijackers, had called a Yemeni safe house from a phone in San Diego shortly before the attack ? a phone call that would have been intercepted and acted upon, claimed Mueller, had today’s surveillance system been in place.”

    You know what else would have stopped 9/11? Bulletproof cockpit doors on all commercial airliners with reinforced locks. Good thing we have those, now this asshole doesn’t have to worry about stopping “the next 9/11.”

    1. phone call that would have been intercepted and acted upon,

      Just like that tip from the Russians that the two guys in Boston were dangerous was acted upon.

      1. Politicians and bureaucrats – masters of the hypothetical

    2. What a bunch of BS. If they knew the phone number of the Yemeni safe house, they could have easily had legal authorization and the existing technology to intercept the call. If they didn’t know the safe house number, but were instead collecting and analyzing 1000’s of calls per hour, there is no way they would have been able to act on any of the information that they collected in the short time between the call and the attach. It would be the proverbial ‘needle in the haystack’. Muller just pointed out another way that they dropped the ball.

    3. You know what else would have stopped 9/11?

      “Lets Roll” posters in every airport.

      Admittedly, thats a bit unfair. But that is the entirety of the security measures needed after 9/11.

    4. You know what else would have stopped 9/11?

      A crystal ball?

      Seriously, I don’t know and don’t really care what would have stopped it. Our security system failed. Out intel networks failed. Our immigration policy failed.

      But our government’s solution for 12+ years has been to give the assholes who failed even more control over us. Fuck that idiotic shit.

      You hear that, NSA? FUCK THAT SHIT! AND FUCK YOU FOR READING THIS!!!!!

      1. Yes, let’s reward national security agencies for messing up by giving them more money and power – no way that could lead to perverse incentives or anything!

    5. a phone call that would have been intercepted and acted upon, claimed Mueller, had today’s surveillance system been in place.”

      I highly doubt it. Unless they’re lieing through their teeth about only collecting metadata. All the metadata would have told them was that al_midhar had called someone in Yemen from San Diego. And that’s all. They wouldn’t have had the contents of the call since they’re not actually listening to our phone conversations. Right? RIGHT?

    6. You know what else could have prevented 9/11? If someone had alerted the FBI that a bunch of weird Middle Eastern guys were very interested in learning how to fly planes, but not so much how to land them.

  57. So you were involved in a car chase involving dozens of cruisers, then 137 rounds were unloaded into an empty car and you helped kill two unarmed people? I guess we’re gonna have to go ahead and fire one of you and then give some of the others a short vacation.

    That ought to placate the savages, right boys?

    1. Cleveland police fired a sergeant and meted out demotions and suspensions Tuesday for a car chase last year that involved five dozen cruisers, 137 rounds of ammunition fired by 13 officers, and the death of two people who, it turned out, were probably unarmed.

      Probably unarmed? What, do they think it’s possible that one of the people they shot managed to throw an invisibility spell over a weapon? If you didn’t find a weapon, then there wasn’t one there.

      1. No, we’re talking Cleveland PD here.

        It’s quite possible that they were so inattentive that they all missed a gun being chucked out a window during the car chase.

        1. In the defense of the cops, it is really hard to watch what’s going on as you’re stroking your gun in anticipation of your first next chance to use it on a civilian and stroking your huge rageboner at the same time…all while driving at 120 mph.

          1. It’s east Cleveland! The potholes are so bad, the cops were probably bouncing around inside their vehicles. Try maintaining a clear sight picture in that environment.

    2. Surely you know there’s no double standard for the pigs!

  58. Czech police from the organized crime unit raided the offices of a close aide to the prime minister and seized documents, sparking calls for the PM to resign. Hey, how come they can do that and we can’t?

    I think we all know the answer to that question. Because fuck you, that’s why.

  59. Thank God for New York. Only their strict gun control laws, which put arms almost exclusively in the possession of police officers, keep their citizens safe.

    Unless, of course, you’re the wife of a deranged police officer that gets gunned down because your right to self-defense has been taken away.

    But their system works. The cop had his service weapon taken away last month…because he beat his wife up. Instead of a protective order and lengthy suspension/termination, he was transferred to a job that didn’t require him to carry a gun.

    FTA: Smikle flew off the handle when his wife came home late from work and didn’t cook dinner, a source said.

    Classy guy. I hope the bagpipers miss a not or two at his parade.

    1. Smikle flew off the handle when his wife came home late from work and didn’t cook dinner

      In that case it was totally justified. Starvation is a horrible way to die. Seeing as officer safety is the most important thing, and cops are cowards, he was right to act on his fear of a potentially deadly situation. He’s got a wife and 8 year old to get home to.

      1. He’s got a wife and 8 year old to get home to.

        Well, not anymore.

  60. A “civilian” gets caught with a stash of pills that aren’t his and he gets tossed in the slammer. Months later, it turns out that the brave first-responder, hero of the Republic and defender of children from drugs wasn’t exactly truthful and intentionally mishandled evidence.

    Will he face charges? Was he immediately arrested and charged with evidence tampering, perjury, gross misconduct or even a seat-belt infraction? Of course not. But at least the “hero” got fired.

    The people he helped put away are still locked up, by the way. But the DA is going to “look into it”.

    1. By the way, the penalty for sending an e-mail to the state bureau of investigations merely accusing a cop of murder will get you charged with a series of felonies.

      But there’s no double-standard, is there? Crazy guy with a grudge accuses cop of crime but cop is never charged…felony charges. Cop lies and manufactures/mishandles evidence and people are convicted based on that…termination but no charges.

      Yeah, I’m gonna have to say that’s totally fucked.

      1. No. Double. Standard.
        Dunphy told me so.

        1. Was he gone while I’ve been away? I hate to think he was on here spewing his absurdities while I was working my ass off in my new job.

          1. Not gone, but much less frequent.

            1. Conspiracy theory – Dunphy is Sloopy’s sock.

              1. Everybody is a sockpuppet here.

    2. Lt. Joey LeBlanc has the eyes of a sociopath.

  61. Held to a higher standard!

    State trooper accused of drunken driving pleads guilty to careless driving, DWI dismissed

    DULUTH, Minn. ? A Minnesota State Patrol trooper accused of driving drunk on his way to a training session in Duluth has pleaded guilty to careless driving.

    The drunken driving charge has been dismissed by the city attorney. St. Louis County Judge Richard Jessen stayed a 90-day jail term for Nick Morse and placed him on 14 months of probation.

    Defense attorney Frederic Bruno says the plea agreement was a reasonable compromise. Bruno says it’s likely Morse will return to law enforcement. City Attorney Gunnar Johnson says the 30-year-old Two Harbors man had no prior history and a low test level for drunken driving.

    The Duluth News Tribune (http://bit.ly/11ArZDM ) says Morse must undergo a chemical dependency evaluation

  62. Somebody has to win the “Officer Of The Day” award for bravery, perseverance and doing the right thing in the face of extreme adversity.

    I think picking today’s winner is easy.

    1. If only he had raped some women or beat the shit our of some homeless man, he would still have a job.

      I suspect this guy might be an honest cop and that is why they started looking into his Army records.

      1. an honest cop

        Finally. A real Friday Funnies we can chuckle at.

        1. There had to be some reason they looked in his Army records. That he knew something and was likely to talk or actually started acting like cops ought to be subject to rules seems like the most likely explanation.

      2. There is nothing more serious than getting free license plates for 4 years. Nothing.

        1. If you’re a Democrat politician in SoCal and you completely fabricate a war record, including a series of decorations you’ve won, all for political gain, you’re covered under the First Amendment (and should be, IMO). But if you’re a cop whose wife gets her leg tore off by a train in a parade, possibly making up whether or not you got one single award will result in your excommunication and destroying of your character all to lower the settlement amount in a civil case.

    2. He really should have claimed a head injury made him forget exactly where he received his Purple Heart.

    3. Notice the army doesn’t actually say he never won the Purple Heart, just that they have no record of it?

      How much you want to bet the issue is more the army’s record keeping than Ladner’s honesty?

  63. Italian alternative progressive metal!

    Featuring Marco Minnemann on drums (super whoopass drummer for those not in the know).

    1. Who can’t post links correctly.

  64. Is barking covered by the First Amendment? Apparently not in Frederick, Maryland where a man was arrested for barking at a police dog.

    FTA: When officers tried to get Disney out of the car, he braced himself against the interior and resisted until another officer arrived and told him he would be tasered.

    Disney was taken to the Frederick County Adult Detention Center, where he was released after posting $4,500 bail. He is charged with harassing a police canine and resisting arrest.

    Nothing like enhancers when you’re arresting a “civilian”. It ensures that plea bargain and a sweet conviction rate for the DA.

    1. Some people are terrified of large dogs. I bet this guy is that and also maybe a bit slow and thus did what he did. But it is double bonus points for cops to arrest and harass disabled people.

      1. That’s protected speech, I don’t care what the pigs in Maryland say. He didn’t do anything to intentionally incite a riot. In fact, he didn’t even address a person.

        I’d like to see a good civil rights attorney take this on pro bono and get this law stricken from the books. Because if a cop can walk through a gate without a warrant and shoot a dog because the dog reacted to him being there and physically/verbally inciting him, all without charge or punishment, the “civilian” in this case should be able to do the same thing without penalty.

        Also, I’d be willing to bet the traffic stop wasn’t even legal. As a rule, the compliant news agencies will give the reason for the stop if there’s a legitimate one, even if it’s determined after the fact, to give the resulting police action some credence. That’s missing in this story.

        1. Of course it is. And the cops don’t give a fuck. They made their point. What is going to happen? The city pay some fees? LOLOLOL

        2. This.

    2. He imitated (barked like) a dog?

      I’m surprised the cops didn’t shoot him.

  65. More reason for me to dislike our Lord and Master Dear Leader: I have to work all weekend because his minions did not like anything about the web site we produced, EVEN THOUGH THEY SIGNED OFF ON THE DESIGN!

    I told my boss that I recognize that “I don’t like this” is political code for “I changed my mind”.

    1. If they don’t spend all of their budget this year they can’t get it back next year. They’re just taking advantage of their ability to stimulize your business to puff up next year’s allocation.

      1. Somehow I think the Prez gets however much money he wants regardless of last year’s budget. Just a funny feeling I have.

        And believe me, the program behind this web site is a doozy. It’s meant to be Obummer’s “legacy” when he leaves office. Once it goes public, I’ll share. It really is the pinnacle of liberal elitism disguised as do-gooderism.

        1. Just wink if you’ve built it to sabotage itself — although I don’t know how you could do a better job than following the client’s orders to the letter.

    2. How do you look at yourself in the mirror every morning knowing that you turned down a good private sector job to keep working for the evil empire that is our federal government?

      The same goes for John and any others out there that are hiding the fact that you work for those fucks.

      1. I didn’t turn down a good private sector job.

        1. I thought you got offered that job in New Hampshire or Vermont or somewhere where maple syrup is being stolen and taken into Canada. My bad.

          Either way, you should GTFO so you can feel better every day.

          Also, when are you and the squeeze heading out on your motorcycle tour? I thought you were gonna come out west and visit.

          1. I had an interview in VT and they thought my $70k salary requirement was too high. $70k. Too high.

            I think the motorcycle tour will be fall of ’14 (some goddamn Brits will be joining us). We’ll certainly get together with the sloopy clan!

            1. OK, but don’t bring the Limeys to my house. Unless they’re fully prepared to mock the royal family and their entire system of government.

              1. Does Britain still have Cromwell supporters?

              2. One of them is a semi-libertarian Mainah (she would be more libertarian if she had stayed in Maine and hadn’t exposed herself to the evils of the United Kingdom for the last 15 years). The other one is fixin to retire form a career in the Royal Army.

                1. What kind of libertarian are you, quartering British troops?

            2. The one interview I had in Vermont for an engineering position turned out to be offering $40k.

              1. That’s fucked up, AD.

                I did my research on average salary differences between DC and Burlington, and calculated that asking for $70k would be giving myself a tiny raise (about 5%), just enough so I could afford moving expenses and nice double wide on some acreage.

                1. Yeah, needless to say I immediately lost interest, and the interview was over like 15 minutes later. I like the area, and it is cheaper to live… But not nearly enough to justify that much of a salary difference. A $5k drop, sure. Even $10k, maybe.

  66. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..water.html

    Jeff Flake is moving up the rankings for Senatorial awesomeness.

  67. http://www.reuters.com/article…..0320130612

    Sailor survives for days in small air bubble.

    1. My favorite bit was when he realized that there was a diver in the compartment, swam down and touched the diver on the shoulder to get his attention.

      If I were the diver, I’d have crapped my pants in zombiefurcht.

      1. he is not sure he will return to the sea

        Im not sure I would ever go to a beach or near a river again.

      2. Thank God his balls didn’t have to breathe the same air, they’d have suffocated him.

      3. The part where he describes the smells of his dead shipmates and the sounds of them being eaten by fish in the pitch black is bone chilling.

  68. Critics of [stop ‘n’ frisk] say it targets minorities and violates their Fourth Amendment rights for protection against unreasonable searches and seizures.

    At least in the local news, I have not heard a single mention of the 4th Amendment, let alone the Constitution.

    1. But it’s obviously perfectly reasonable to search and seize, because of da childrunnz!!!1!

  69. 500th!

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