Friday Funnies: Babysitting Drone

Henry Payne

Comments

[Fist of Etiquette]

As Dr. and Mrs. Paul go out for a night on the town, the seeds of discontent are sown within a young Rand. And now you know the rest of the story.

[LTC(ret) John]

Brilliant! And will be totally adopted at Slate as a legit argument...

[Lord Humungus]

it's so funny I forgot to laugh.

[John Galt]

I'd give the little bastard a Hellfire missile. Look at him, he's obviously up to no good.

[Bobarian]

This drone appears to be un-armed, so FAIL.

[Gindjurra]

No drone is ever completely unarmed. If nothing else, you can pull off a kamikaze attack. A Predator drone weighs over half a ton empty, after all.

[Counterfly]

OK, so to start with, it's doubtful that that drone could get enough airlift inside an average house (I mean unless that's supposed to be Bob Hope or the Gateses outside or something and it's a giant mansion) to fly around. Now it could be attached to the ceiling, but then why bother calling it a drone? It could just be like a CCTV camera or something.

Overlooking that, does the couple have some sort of monitoring device that they carry with them to remotely view their kid? Or is it part of the babysitting drone service that they provide people to monitor the child. Also, is the drone pilot supposed to be the monitor, or is there another 'crew' position that would actually monitor it?

If something does go wrong with the kid, does whoever is monitoring the drone output respond? Or do they just report it to the parents? Are there drone responders, or do they notify the typical A/F/P responders?

In any case, it seems like a huge cost-to-effect ratio to monitor just one kid. Now if you could free range them in a large unescapable corral, that would bring down the cost ratio AND make it so the drone could actually fly and monitor the kids. Not sure still why you'd want that, but hey, who am I to judge.

[Ted S.]

How did the kid end up with such a button nose when the parets have schnozzes that would put Jimmy Durante and Karl Malden to shame?

[John Galt]

He's adopted?

[Loki]

$10 says the mailman has a button nose. Mom's got some 'splaining to do.

[Ted S.]

Overlooking that, does the couple have some sort of monitoring device that they carry with them to remotely view their kid?

There's an app for that.

[invisible furry hand]

How long before the babysitter drone invites a boy drone over for drunken drone sex on the sofa?

[Ted S.]

The kid has to learn about sex sometime

[Ted S.]

And a 16th birthday wouldn't be a bad time.

[Fatty Bolger]

News from 2083:

MOREAU, N.Y. - The mother who allegedly rented sexbots for her son's 22nd birthday was arraigned Thursday morning.

73-year-old Joodeeeee Viger-Simpson-Gannet-Woo, of Gansevoort, was charged with five counts of Endangering the Welfare of a Child when arraigned Thursday in the City of Moreau. Her virtual attorney entered a not guilty plea on her behalf to all five counts.

[Counterfly]

I don't know, ifh, how long did you usually wait?

[Fatty Bolger]

What's your point, Payne? WHAT'S YOUR FUCKING POINT?!!!

Also, needz moar labelz.

[LTC(ret) John]

It always needz moar labelz with Payne!

[SumpTump]

lol, gotta love those drones, too funny man.

http://www.PrivateWeb.da.bz

[Counterfly]

Haha, wtf. This comment is the funniest thing on this page.

[Bobarian]

The sheer irony of Skynet appreciating the subtle drone humor that is so far above our head is a sign of the coming apocalypse.

Or maybe Payne's labels are in machine code?

[Brian from Texas]

We already have babysitting drones. They're called TV and the Internet.

[Tim]

It's like the drone wrote the thing.

[Fatty Bolger]

Aw, they're so cute before they grow in their penis-noses.

[Quetzalcoatl]

Private market already beat them to it

[db]

Drones are for your own good, kids. You could get hurt if Mommy and Daddy or their assigned proxies aren't around to keep you out of trouble all the time. Believe me, you thank us when you grow out of this rebellious "liberty" phase.

[Cheradenine Zakalwe]

Why did the Springfield Isotopes buy advertising space on this drone?

[db]

The Atoms for Peace program is finally paying dividends.

[Mongo]

If you turn the cartoon upside-down, the frowny-face kid turns into a bearded, toothy jihadist!

Brilliant, Payne!

[GroundTruth]

Ok, this one is actually funny, in a sarcastic, makes me glad I'll be dead soon, way.