Higher Taxes Squeeze Consumer Spending, Feds Not Forthcoming in Bradley Manning Case, Detroit is Still a Mess: P.M. Links


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  1. Michigan Governor Rick Snyder declared Detroit to be in a state of financial emergency. Wait … Yup, that’s a new story. Huh.

    “New” is relative. I mean, do you realize how old the universe is?

    1. Like a hundred years old?

      1. Nah, it’s gotta be older than that. I mean, that dusty old document written by white slave owners is like 100 years old.

        1. For glibertarians, that was the beginning of time!

        2. So few knew that BC was “before constitution”

  2. Eight South African police officers have been arrested after video footage surfaced of them handcuffing a man to the back of their van and dragging him down the street.

    The eight were dragged in for questioning.

    1. ragged in for questioning.
      kicking and screaming no doubt

  3. Holy fuck, was it ever a bitch to get to work through the vast devastation that sequestration has caused…I was nearly unable to read HyR.

    1. Yeah, well did you drive near poor neighborhoods? I’m sure they’re starving in the streets.

      1. My grocery store is out of cat food because it has all been stolen by old ladies on the verge of starvation.

      2. I’m about to head home and, so help me, if one of those bodies damages my car someone is gonna hear about it.

      3. Luckily the Banksters get their subsides direct from the FED so they are doing all right.

      4. Drive? There are no more ROADZ!!1!1one here in middle Tennessee. Thankfully I travel via sedan carried by orphans or I’d be stranded. Stranded I say!

        1. I had to kill a man for his donkey just so I could get away from the horde of hungry children that were canabalizing the neighborhood. Man, it’s rough out there.

        2. Yeah, driving is impossible. I had an old black woman from Nebraska tell me where to get a motorcycle so I could get to Boulder. But Vegas sounds more fun.

          1. That’s where you’re gonna make your Stand, eh?

            1. Bumpty-bumpty-bump. CIBOLA! My life for you!

          2. M-O-O-N.

            That spells sequester.

            1. +1 million internets

      5. We really need Mary to come in and do another Disaster Preparedness Video.

        1. When was this?

            1. I’m confused.

              1. Longtime troll Mary used to make videos about the members of this Commentariat. That was one of them.

                1. Yeah, I saw that. I’m just shocked she put that much effort into it. She doesn’t have much going on in her life, does she?

                2. It was actually pretty entertaining.

                  A standing question though, is that a cosmo or a yokel in the skit?

            2. The clip reminds me a bit of Eraserhead.

        2. I want to see what she said about me!

    2. I got offered a job with a 30% raise. The downside, less H&R time. I’m torn whether to take it or not.

      1. Do you like what you do now? Do you expect to like what you would do at the new place. I could be making more money, but my job satisfaction is pretty high.

        The downside is, I have to choose – it’s hookers or blow, not both.

      2. Congrats, Brett, that sounds pretty awesome regardless.

      3. Hey, congrats! You should be able to keep up your posting rate if you use part of the raise to buy a homeless guy to post for you. Don’t forget the monocle upgrade.

      4. Let’s face it: the buzz around the water cooler has been that the quality of your contributions here has been gradually deteriorating over the past several months. Perhaps it’s time for you to move on to somewhere where your unique talents will be better appreciated.

    3. I got home with barely 50 rounds left in the twin 1919A4s.

      1. Is there a headline I should expect to be reading soon about another mass shooting?

  4. Maintaining its stellar reputation for transparency, the U.S. government is refusing to publish transcripts of proceedings in the Bradley Manning court martial. Since Manning can release his own statements and journalists are taking notes, the reticence seems … petty.

    Down the Memory Hole with him!

    1. No. The case will be appealed. And that requires a transcript. There will be a transcript. It just takes a while to make one. I don’t blame them for not doing it immediately when people are watching the trial and take their own damn notes.

    2. Down the Memory Hole with him!

      No, it’s a sinkhole in Tampa.

  5. JD,

    They probably just don’t want to have their court reporters work overtime to produce a transcript immediately.

    1. Maybe they expect reporters to use a Jedi mind meld.

      1. Star Fleet X-wing fighters are on the way!

        1. Are those the new Firefly-class X-Wings?

          1. BSG 75 led by Admiral Cain is en route to the Gamma Quadrant. They’ll engage the Borg at Tattooine.

            1. *spit take*

              1. Cardassians always ride in single file to disguise their numbers.

            2. Yeah, let’s see what song Cain is singing after John Crichton is through with her and her dingy.

        2. I heard the Millenium Enterprise can to the Kobiyashi Maru run in 7 parsecs at warp factor 8000. With a Romulan wookie at the helm.

          1. “Come to the Dark Side. Together, we can control the Spice!”

          2. A long time ago in the 23rd Century…

            1. To boldly go where Boba Fett has gone before…

              1. May the Prophets of Bajor be with you. So say we all!

                1. Spoiler alert: It turns out Commodore Matt Decker was actually Captain Will Decker’s father the whole time.

                  1. FoE, these aren’t the positronic brain powered androids you’re looking for.

                  2. And the entire series was really set 250,000 years in the past, thus we’re all related to Wesley Crusher.

                    1. Or we would be if he wasn’t impotent. Don’t act like that bitch reproduced.

                    2. Now we just need to fly the Death Star back in time to dump a couple of whales into the fires of Mt Doom.

                    3. It’s not impossible. I used to bullseye Hortas in my T-16 back on Risa, they’re not much bigger than two meters.

                    4. This mashup business would be awesome and hilarious if you weren’t all just imitating Obama.

                    5. NO KILL I
                      -Jedi Master Yoda-Horta.

              2. The fiery pits of Mordor?

                1. With Nazis. It’s another Earth-parallel.

          3. It’s over 9000!

            1. At warp 9000 you turn into a womp rat and mate with your captain.

              1. Come on, FoE, that’s too implausible for fiction.

              2. I thought you reached infinite improbability and became a gorram reaver.

          4. Han Solo will swoop down in Gay Deceiver to drive off the Moties attacking Louis Wu while he attempts to repair the DeLorean in time to make his reservation at the Restaurant at the End of the World.

    2. Prosper and live you long time … Yes?!?!

  6. Americans are hanging on to their money as they feel the squeeze from higher payroll taxes.

    So they can’t buy another yacht. Boo hoo.

    1. No you idiot. They are hoarders not spending because they hate Obama and want him to fail.

      1. The only patriotic spending is spending on Obama campaign t-shirts, posters and bumper stickers.

  7. What information does the Secret Service have on the Aaron Swartz case? They ain’t telling!

    In their defense, secret is right there in the name.

  8. Florida man swallowed by sinkhole, presumed dead.

    It’s a sad story, but there’s just something about the headline that is funny to think about.

    1. Clearly Obama was right about the consequences of sequestration.

  9. California voters apparently have second thoughts about that whole Prop. 8 thing. Now, 61 percent of them favor legalizing gay marriage.

    Just bring it up for an actual vote again, the numbers will go back.

      1. They’d get my support, IYKWIM.

        1. They’d get my support, IYKWIMAITYD

          FTFY, HTH

          1. That’s just unnecessary pedantry, exactly what I’d expect from someone like you.

            1. You spelled “pederasty” wrong, nimrod.

              1. Is there such a thing as ?unnecessary pederasty??

    1. Just bring it up for an actual vote again, the numbers will go back.

      Or maybe that the messiah finally has voiced support for it, they’ll fall in line.

  10. http://www.slate.com/blogs/fut…..puter.html

    Its a real Jedi mind meld. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    1. I am not sure that is something to smile about

  11. http://www.nytimes.com/2013/03……html?_r=0

    The Chinese Communists decided not to kill a scumbag murdering pirate with a drone strike, and instead captured him, tried him, convicted him, and executed him.

    What kind of crazy world is this where the PRC shows more respect for due process then the USA?

    1. Han Youyi, a criminal law professor, wrote via microblog. “State-administered violence is no loftier than criminal violence.”

      Better watch out, Mr Han. Talk like that will land you in deep water … wait, you’re in China? Never mind, you should be safe.

      1. I think he just landed on an SPLC hate group list.

      2. Han Youyi, a criminal law professor, wrote via microblog. “State-administered violence is no loftier than criminal violence.”

        “For it was a witty and truthful rejoinder which was given by a captured pirate to Alexander the Great. The king asked the fellow, ‘What is your idea, in infesting the sea?’ And the pirate answered, ‘The same as yours, in infesting the earth! but because I do it with a tiny craft, I’m called a pirate; because you have a mighty army, you’re called an emperor.'”
        – Augustine of Hippo

    2. Welcome to Obamaworld! Your rights are our toilet paper!

      1. That reminds me, if you go to a job interview, ask to use the restroom before you leave. The kind of toilet paper they have will tell you exactly how much they value their employees.

  12. …consumer spending was up by a whopping 0.1 percent and is expected to pull back this quarter.

    They’re actually expecting an indicator to drop? Must be gearing up for sequester of doom examples.

    1. Just wait until they blame the consumer spending decrease on the sequester.

    2. They’re expecting consumer spending to drop, which will need to be replaced by government spending. All according to plan.

      1. And later revised to show the Obamatron’s ginormous benefit to the economy!

  13. I still believe that Obama is right: he can get the rest of the U.S. on the track to recovery, just like Detroit.

    1. Some people might interpret that as a threat.

        1. That Obama can get America on the same path as Detroit.

            1. Your mom.


              1. YOUR mom.

                /Warty and Sugarfree tag team

                1. Your Facehugger.

                  /Matt Damon

  14. Wow, did we actually do something to restrain federal spending today? It feels a little weird.

      1. Whoops, threading!

      2. That is horrible.

      3. Looking at that picture of Jimmy Savile, I’m wondering how it took people so long to realize he was a pedophile.

        1. Yeah, that’s a whole other question…

      4. Well, last I heard The Situation was a douche and JWoww was retarded and Snooki was…wait, which Jersey are we talking about?

        1. There’s already a JWoww subthread.

          1. You’re not the president of this PM Links!

            1. Don’t look at me, I voted for John.

              1. After I gave you Melville yesterday?!? Thanks a lot, Fist.

                1. You should have asked for something in return. Never give favors for free. Not on a libertarian blog.

                2. When I read this, what I saw was “After I fisted you yesterday, Melville? Thanks a lot, dick.” I still think my first interpretation was better.

                  1. It was.

          2. What’s that, nicole? You want more Jwoww?

            Jwoww from a better angle.

        2. I thought The Situation was gay and Snooki was retarded.

          1. Look, John, we can argue about which one is retarded, which one is gay, which one is a douche, etc., or we can just agree that they’re all all of those things. Can’t we all just get along?

            1. Fair enough.

            2. No link to the end of The Breakfast Club?

      5. It only stopped when the Nazis took over, and picked back up after they left. That is some sick shit.

        1. Isn’t that nuts? What I want to know is how many people of how much importance in Jersey must be involved in this to be covering it up to the extent they seem to. It is very, very odd. Of course, also sort of an interesting study in what happens when your community is kind of freakishly small and thus weird.

      1. apocalypse…I never appreciated just how fine is the line between it and The Recovery?

  15. http://timesdaily.com/stories/…..nds,203234


  16. http://www.realclearpolitics.c…..ident.html

    I am not a dictator. But I would like to be and am trying to get there okay.

    1. “I am not a dictator, he said wistfully…”

    2. No, not a dictator, just a dick.

    3. There is another video in that sequence where a reporter asks Obama if he is ducking responsibility by pinning the sequester on the Repubs…and he asks her “Julie, what would you do?” He may be president but he certainly isn’t a leader.

  17. “Even in Texas, unloading 41 shots at a fleeing, unarmed suspect is considered a display of excessive enthusiasm.”

    Hey! Easy on my state. In Texas you have the right to shoot ANYONE who crashes through your front door, EVEN COPS. Yep, that’s right.

    Of course, police have the (defacto) right to shoot your dog even if the dog is tied up and the policeman has gone to the wrong fucking address, so I guess it’s a little of the good with the bad.

    1. Hey, at least he actually got fired and not put on administrative leave.

  18. Leonard Nimoy is an Obama-tron:

    Spock himself — also known as actor Leonard Nimoy — weighed in, more or less defending Obama by tweeting: “Only a Vulcan mind meld will help with this congress.”

    1. http://www.avclub.com/articles…..enn,93157/

      An NBC affiliate preempted the national broaads and aired an old Matlock tv movie. The ploy worked; ratings increased and they get to keep all of the ad revenue.

      1. * Oops. Threading fail.

        1. Those seem to be contagious today.

      2. Just a sidenote: Mariska Hargitay is the only reason to watch SVU.

        1. I like her too.

    2. Must be Pon farr again.

        1. Pon farr isn’t Jewish, dude. It’s a practice of the inhabitants of Tatooine.

          1. Duh, from where do you think Jews come?

            1. Ferenginor?

            2. Harvey Weinstein does kind of look like Jabba the Hutt

  19. http://www.washingtontimes.com…..ention-co/

    DNC stiffs Duke Energy.

    1. Given the crony cock licking Duke officials have been giving politicians and parties who promote the green scam these past several years, they deserve it.

      BTW, dad built them a coal plant in the seventies at their Belews Creek facility. One day I’ll have to tell you about the time he explained how a rail gun worked after we hiked to a peak that had a nice ranged site view over the original Wachovia facility, but that’s for another time, a freer one.

    2. They funny thing is, I bet Duke Energy made a contribution to the DNC for the convention.

      1. They did. They have also been backing a lot of stupid proglodyte shit locally as well. I hope the change in the governorship and the legislature fucks them over royally.

        1. If you get into be with government you should expect to get fucked!

          1. Sequestration stole my “d”!!!!!

            1. Glad you corrected that. Thought there must have been a missing word, so I didn’t get it.

  20. Missed the last few days of PM links, but did anyone catch this? Teen Miss Delaware resigns crown after allegedly appearing in porno.

    I was talking to a feminist friend of mine about it and she said that the porno is no different than the beauty pageant itself anyway.

    1. Warty put that up. Now even the nice girls do porn. What an age we live in.

      1. The best possible age of all, John.

        1. There’s a high school half a mile from my university, so needless to say it can be difficult to distinguish college girls dressed sluttily from high school girls dressed sluttily.

          1. Why would you need to distinguish? Oh wait, I’m guessing the statutory rape age in your state is probably too high.

            1. It’s not like there aren’t 18-year-olds in high school and 17-year-olds in college anyway.

            2. You always think it’s too high.

            3. 18 in California. Now that I’m 21 I wouldn’t doubt it if the state threw the book at me for that.

    2. That’s not fair. Porn serves a purpose.

      1. So do pageants. A few girls get scholarships and feminists have a reason to be butt hurt, which is something they always need.

        1. That doesn’t say much, given what offends radfems.


    3. Unless the Miss Teen USA has added an anal gaping component to the competition, then no, it’s not like porno. Not at all.

      1. “Miss Airtight Pennsylvania is…”

        1. It is the keystone state, after all.

    4. I love how every news report on it is quick to put VIDEO in the title and then leaves us disappointed.

      Damn click baiting.

      1. Go away, batin’!

      2. The Gawker article originally linked a couple of days ago had a link to the sex vid. It was very vanilla, but it was definitely a cute, healthy young woman fucking.

        1. You can find the full video up on the Pirate Bay if you want. It’s how I determined that she is, in fact, extremely adorable. Poor girl.

    5. I thought it was a sex tape.

    6. Feminist make friends?

  21. Officer Patrick Tuter was fired after the lethal incident, and faces a lawsuit, though no criminal charges so far.

    Civil courts are soft on crime.

  22. So the cop fired 41 rounds. Is that a forty round magazine with one in the chamber or are they making prime number magazines? No person pledged to protect and to serve the public welfare could be so douchey as to fire off a full magazine, drop the empty, slap in a new one and repeat multiple times just to shoot a person who is already running away. These are real American heroes people. They NEED big magazines and ill defined assault rifles!!

    1. When cops have them they are patrol rifles. When civvies have them they’re assault rifles.

    2. 41 shots and he hit the guy three times. Who knows where the other bullets ended up.

      1. If such a well-trained professional can’t do better than that, imagine the carnage that would ensue if we let everyone carry a gun.

  23. Shikha Dalmia warned Rick Snyder not to do this, but did he listen?

  24. http://www.avclub.com/articles…..enn,93157/

    An NBC affiliate preempted the national broadcast and aired an old Matlock tv movie. The ploy worked; ratings increased and they get to keep all of the ad revenue.

  25. Even more sequestration lies.

    But the sequestration issue has been one of those rare items that frustrate me to the point of being incapable of spending time on it. When I read about sequestration, my brain seizes. The stupidity of it all simply confounds me to the point of being speechless. For me, this is a shocking and rare predicament.

    Too bad it didn’t hold.

    Firstly, the completely inexcusable conflation of the deficit and the debt, and, secondly, the total failure to acknowledge actual deficit reduction. The press, and especially the Republicans, refuse to acknowledge that not only has the deficit been reduced by more than half-a-trillion dollars since 2009, but also that the deficit will continue to drop with or without the automatic cuts that appear to be inevitable by the end of the week. As a result, deficit hysteria is based on nearly unprecedented stupidity and deliberate deception. And very few players are innocent in this endeavor.

    1. 2009 2,104,989 3,517,677 -1,412,688
      2010 2,162,724 3,456,213 -1,293,489
      2011 2,303,466 3,603,061 -1,299,595
      2012 estimate 2,468,599 3,795,547 -1,326,948

      1. Where’d you get the numbers, Coeus? I’m gonna repost them elsewhere and need to answer the inevitable whining.

          1. That’s a right-wing source. [/NYT commenter]

      2. The 2013 estimate is ~$900 billion.

        1. Based upon them following the deficit reduction plan. You can see how well that went last year.

          1. Does the 2013 estimate include the ‘revenue enhancements’ from January?

            Like California, I suspect their estimates of new revenue wont pan out the way they forecast.

            1. I wouldn’t doubt that they used every accounting trick available. They damn sure did last year.

    2. I like when they say the deficit has been reduced by half a trillion dollars, because that took us all the way from 1.3 trillion to 850 billion. What happens the next time we have a crash if we’re running up 700-800 billion dollar deficits even during periods of ‘growth?’

      Answer: We’re fucked.

    3. The deficit is down by a half a trillion dollars. Sounds like so much if you don’t mention that there is still a trillion dollars to go.

      1. What math is it that permits them to say the deficit is down $500 billion?

        1. I hadn’t seen the numbers Coeus posted, but I’d heard that our deficit was down around 850-900 billion. Of course, if Coeus’ numbers are correct, then I heard filthy, filthy lies.

          1. then I heard filthy, filthy lies.

            Did you expect anything else from the chicken littles?

          2. Based on accumulated debt for the last five months, the deficit will be around $1.2 trillion. If it’s below that, it will be almost entirely due to the elimination of the FICA holiday.

        2. I think it is. The deficit is right around a trillion right now. But in 2009 thanks to TARP and the porkulus it was over 1.5 trillion. Amazingly enough changing the party that controlled the House in 2010 seems to have had some effect.

          1. Estimated -1,326,948. And every estimate to date has been low.

    4. The stupidity of it all simply confounds me to the point of being speechless. For me, this is a shocking and rare predicament.

      “Now let me write a 3,000 word manifesto detailing this.”

  26. The Science is Settled!

    Efforts to ease sleep deprivation among teenagers in the Washington region have expanded, with at least four suburban school districts now examining whether the first bells of the high school day ring too early in the morning.

    School leaders in Anne Arundel and Howard counties have announced in recent weeks that they are looking into later high school start times, just months after Montgomery and Fairfax counties decided to pursue the issue.

    [. . .]

    Experts say that the biological clock of teenagers is geared for later bedtimes and later wake-ups and that a lack of sleep is linked to problems including depression, absenteeism and low academic performance.

    [. . .]

    “The goal is to make sure everyone has as much information as possible about the science” and data, both to understand benefits for teens and the impact in school districts that have changed start times, said work group leader John Matthews, a retired transportation director for the school system.

    1. As a parent, I can attest to the fact that my kids schools have it backward…high schoolers start before middle schoolers, before elems. It should be the other way around.

  27. Oh for fucks sake: David Axelrod challenges Bob Woodward over White House ‘threatening’ emails since apparently you can spin the email exchange to make the White House staffer seem more cordial.

    1. Remember when liberals used to talk about “challenge effects” on free speech? Yeah neither do I.

      1. “chilling effects”

      2. Remember when liberals thought criticizing the president was patriotic?

        1. There were even bumper stickers! Ah, those were the days.

  28. In-N-Out has Ask Me Anythign Reddit, reveals creations from secret menu you that very little people know about.

    And in other new I know where I will be eating dinner tonight.

    1. You have to bring your own bacon, if that’s what you are wondering…

    2. The article didn’t seem to cover In N Out’s secret opening times. The one I go to (LAX) has a posted opening time of 10AM, but I have gone there for breakfast at 8AM several times. Nothing like a Double Double for the first meal of the day…

  29. http://hotair.com/archives/201…..r-my-desk/

    Connecticut Dem to 17-year-old girl: If you’re bashful, I’ve got a snake right here under my desk

    1. “Hewett said his remark came out wrong and he understood how it could be misconstrued. According to The Day of New London, he said Thursday: “What I meant to say was, if you are shy then I have an acre of land in the Everglades.””


      1. I actually listened to the audio and it sounded like he didn’t mean it to be a lewd joke. It really does sound like he meant to say something innocent, and is just a moron.

        It’s rare that I defend a politician, but I don’t think there’s any way the guy actually mean to make a sex joke to a 17 year old during a public meeting.

        1. Yeah, but let’s pretend there was an R next to his name and the state was Texas or Mississppi, how do you think the media would react to this?

          1. They’d react horribly. But that’s just evidence that people in the media are useless hypocritical morons, not that this guy actually meant it to be a lewd comment.

            He shouldn’t be punished just because unrelated people in the media are a bunch of hypocritical cunts.

            1. I agree.

    2. “What I meant to say was, if you are shy then I have an acre of land in the Everglades.”

      I can’t even come up with a context where that would make sense.

  30. The answer to rampant truancy in DC schools? MOAR SOSHUL WERKERZ! Bureaucrats bewildered that their plan isn’t working, and call for MOAR LIJISLASHUN!!!

    At the same time that the school system is referring more children to CFSA, truancy appears to be dropping significantly at some elementary schools. But it’s not clear that the referrals are the reason for the change: At the high school level, absenteeism has actually risen at the schools with the highest referral rates.

    Referrals are a “very useful tool as we work to combat truancy, but referrals are not the solution,” Henderson said. “Evidence does not indicate that this is helping to reduce truancy at this point.”

    Catania took umbrage at that conclusion, saying it’s too soon to know what effect referrals are having. He has introduced legislation that calls for referring teens ages 14 to 17 to CFSA after 10 unexcused absences. Currently, those older children must miss 25 days of school before they are referred to court social services ? and by that time it’s too late to make a difference, Catania argues.

    1. The only reasonable, common sense answer to truancy is state-run boarding schools. It will create shovel-ready projects to construct the state boarding facilities, as well as necessary security measures to prevent truancy (watchtowers, fences, motion detection devices). To more easily identify and track potential truants, each student will be issued a set of regulation clothing with their student ID number printed on the left breast, two inches below the collarbone and RFID chips sewn into each article of their regulation garments.

      1. You jest but let’s face it, they would absolutely love this idea.

  31. Initially posted elsewhere by Appalachian Australian, I could not allow this not to be in PM Links for all your pleasures:

    Our favourite faux-feminist self-loathing male blogger now cites evidence that the key to a happy heterosexual relationship is for the female to fuck the male in the ass. (But no, he’s completely secure in his own orientation and gender identity. No issues there at all, nope.)

    1. You know, that is just the sort of thing confidentiality agreements in relationships were designed to protect.

      “men who get into anal penetration are among the most secure in their masculinity: because they’ve examined themselves, faced their fears.”

      That’s a load of crock. I don’t find anything terrifying about the butt shenanigans, and consider it just another place to party, but what Robert Downy Jr. did in Less Than Zero still gives me the heebie jeebies. There is no way to rationalize it. Most people consider the former to be more terrifying than the later instead of the other way around. It probably has something to do with an anathema to submission on a psychological level for me. In anal, the one receiving is getting most if not all the pleasure, in oral it is the other way around.

      ‘You see the bottom is where all the power is generated.’

      1. In anal, the one receiving is getting most if not all the pleasure,

        Not the way I do it.

        1. Lol!

      2. ‘You see the bottom is where all the power is generated.’

        That discussion is possibly the finest two minutes in all of IASIP.

    2. I am Jack’s utter lack of surprise.

    3. Everyone knows Breakfast Links is where the most debate takes place ๐Ÿ™

      1. That’s because Reason has an East Coast Bias.

    4. Best comment:

      Wait … we’re now calling male ass play “pegging”?!? What sort of soft, non-assertive, wussification of sexual gratification is this?!?

      Back in my day, pegging involved a one-legged woman jamming you up the ass with her stump while she was dressed as a pirate. That’s pegging.

      My female partner sticking something up my ass in order to help me get my rocks off? That’s just called a Tuesday at my house. Or at least I wish it was …

      Why are the people who mock Gawker writers always funnier than the actual Gawker writers?

      1. Because actual Gawker writers are fucking terrible writers.

    5. In his Myth of the Modern Homosexual, historian and cultural theorist Rictor Norton explains that the term “asshole” developed as a homophobic (and thus woman-hating) slur

      Well if Rictor Norton says it, how can it possibly be wrong?

      1. Man called asshole. Women, minorities worst hit.

        1. I particularly loved the “homophobic (and thus woman-hating).” God do I love it.

          1. Seriously, what are you supposed to call the anus if you only want to use simple Anglo-Saxon? It’s a hole in your ass. An asshole.

            1. Stop hating me!

              1. Only by extension of you being a woman.

              2. I admit it; every time I wipe my ass, it’s due to sublimated rage at my mother for toilet training me.

                1. You’re lucky. You got toilet training. Mum was into Rand.

                  1. “What does a child say when asking for a pacifier?”
                    “She is saying- I am a leech.”

          2. Yeah, I always assumed homophobia meant you were hating gay people. Thank god Professor Feminist was here to set me straight!

            Pun. Intended.

          3. Wha!? I’m trying to figure out a way I wouldn’t find “homophobic (and thus woman-hating)” not offensive to women and homos. We are not interchangeable (mostly. I know a few ‘any port in a storm’s types)

      2. Noting that one has an anal orifice is both homophobic and misogynist?

      3. Wait, homophobic now means woman-hating?

        1. but who will speak for the donkeys?

          1. As far as Warty is concerned the donkeys are spoken for.

              1. Asses of the Caribbean sorry if I fubar’d the link I’m on a mobile device.

                1. Yeah, you SF’d it, ya bastard.

                2. Bugger all


                    1. That’s terrible! Why would his mother get between him and the bird he loves!?

                      Also since they’re just modern dinosaurs we can infer that sexytime with a velociraptor would be awesome.

  32. Connecticut lawmaker makes lewd remark to 17-year old girl at legislative hearing.

    And Democrats are defending him.

    1. So is Irish. In this very thread, no less.

      1. Did you listen to the audio? It does not sound like he meant it to be a sex joke.

        I’m not defending him because I think a sex joke directed to a 17 year old is okay, I’m defending him because I think he’s just a moron who doesn’t think before he talks.

    2. Hey, Menendez set the bar pretty low.

      1. 17! Menendez would never be caught screwing an old hag in her late teens.

  33. Won’t someone PLEASE think of the bureaucrats?

    Exuberant British Columbians celebrated the power of direct democracy in August 2011 when they voted to kill the harmonized sales tax ? but in the windowless, bunker-like rooms in the Ministry of Finance building across the street from the B.C. legislature, bureaucrats could barely hold back their tears.

    Armstrong said he essentially spent that last 10 months ? following last May’s passage of Bill 54, the Provincial Sales Tax Act ? sheltering his 14-member team from their normal day-to-day ministry duties to allow them to work full out on bringing back the PST.

  34. Beretta being courted by West Virginia and Virginia with Maryland gun control law being debated

    On Thursday, West Virginia House Speaker Rick Thompson said he had written to Beretta to offer West Virginia as a suitable location because it’s “where the people understand and care about your industry.”

    Thompson said his state has one of the highest gun ownership rates in the country, behind only Alaska, Montana, South Dakota and Wyoming. He also said that it would not support gun-control measures such as those being discussed in Maryland.

    “This, combined with the state’s long support of the Second Amendment and our close proximity to your current headquarters, makes us an excellent choice for Beretta USA in your relocation efforts,” Thompson wrote.

    Earlier in the week, Virginia Republican lieutenant governor candidate and investment company executive Pete Snyder wrote to the company touting Virginia’s favorable tax and gun climate. Beretta already has a facility in Fredericksburg, and Snyder said he could promise Beretta “would be welcomed with open arms in all parts of the Commonwealth.”

    Plus, he added, it was Virginian James Madison who penned the nation’s Bill of Rights, including the right to bear arms.

    Waiting for Rick Perry’s bid.

  35. TV is truly going to be awesome this spring: The Americans, Game of Thrones, Arrested Development, and now a revival of Whose Line is It Anyway? featuring the return of Colin Mochrie, Ryan Stiles, and Wayne Brady with Aisha Tyler as the host.

    1. I’m super unimpressed by The Americans, to the point where I’m letting it languish on the TiVo. Maybe because I actually experienced that time and the sleeper paranoia and they just don’t capture it well. Plus, sleeper agents were supposed to, you know, sleep, and wait for activation, not be doing active missions constantly.

      1. You know, that would be a great idea. A show about Soviet sleeper agents but the reveal isn’t done until the third season, when they’re activated. Almost no hints the whole time, either.

        1. Other great idea: Espionage in Berlin during the cold war. I think that could be awesome if done by the right people.

      2. I thought the episode where everyone is freaked out after Reagan was shot did an excellent job capturing the fear and paranoia that encapsulated both sides.

        1. I thought the most recent episode was well done to.

          They havent topped the pilot yet and they did a few “Monster of the Week” episodes after that, but seem to be getting into story arc development now.

          1. Burn Notice does an good job of blending the ‘monster of the week’ aspect with the seasonal story arch better than most serials in my opinion. I have dropped many a show over the years for not being able to connect the back story to what is going on at the moment, and thus the arch looses all of its narrative power. A good recent example of that is ‘Person of Interest.’ I caught the first 11 or so streaming it one week. Decent premise but little over all connection.

      3. The problem with “The Americans” is that it seems to try to be action-y. The time period and material could hold as a pure drama, no need for poison tip umbrellas and sniper scouting.

        1. I agree, although the show does a good job of depicting the KGB as masters of the honeypot and sexual entrapment.

    2. with Aisha Tyler

      I’m in.

      1. Yup. For a while, I thought they used her as a model for Lana.

      2. Hell yeah. She is hotter than the seven Hells that fuel my black heart.

        But I hate game shows.

        1. You get that “Whose Line” is not an actual game show, right?

          1. What, no prizes? Then what’s the point of playing?

            1. On the original and the Drew Carey version, the regulars make each other laugh so much that most of the show they’re on the verge of peeing their pants.

  36. Being able to deduct private school tuition is “welfare for the rich.” Because the “rich” should definitely be paying for public school systems they don’t use.*

    *My kid is in private school. My family makes less than the median. I would LOVE to get to keep more of my hard earned money rather than being forced to pay for government services I don’t want nor will ever use.

    1. you would think lawmakers would be careful about spending public money. So it may surprise you to learn that in a growing number of states, legislators are setting aside public money to pay for private school tuition ? and rich people are benefiting.
      It’s a school choice option known as tuition tax credits (or private school tax credits or student tax credits or scholarship tax credits and a few other things too.) Whatever they are called, these tax credits are essentially alternatives to vouchers, which give public funds to families so their kids can attend private schools.

      Tax credits = spending. It’s actually incredibly important that the difference between vouchers and tax credits is that only for the former does the state actually spend money. God forbid these people should have a brain or an ounce of morality, though.

      1. Their hatred and jealousy of anyone who has more than them takes precedence over anything else. I’d pity them if they weren’t such disgusting creatures. Gollum is a paragon of virtue compared to these people.

        1. Hey, you lay off of Gollum. Without him, we’d be working for Sauron as some sort of coffee-brewing slaves.

          1. “Hey, you lay off of Gollum. Without him, we’d be working for Sauron as some sort of coffee-brewing slaves.”

            Saruman Pulp & Paper L.L.C and subsidiary Saruman Applied Bio-Engineering Inc. were the victims of a viscous smear campaign by the sierra club and a bunch of tree hugging elven hippies, with their cronies and stooges, bent on keeping all of middle earth living in the dark ages with their radical eco-demagoguery. Sauron Minerals International and spinoff company known as Mordor defense contracting was also victimized by the same group, at the behest of a bunch of wage hiking dwarven union thugs of the UMWoME Local 215, constantly bemoaning and vilifying those poor immigrant “goblin scabs” who were willing to mine at a fraction of the wage and benefits. All were cleverly manipulated by the bat-shit schizophrenic sociopath known as Gollum, in an attempt to divert a stolen military prototype stealth technology ring, from the research lab at Mordor arsenal, to his possession, for unknown purposes. Think about that before you write another fluff piece for poor Gollum.

  37. I can’t believe this hasn’t been posted yet. Guess who wrote it?

    If You Want a More Thoughtful Boyfriend, Try Pegging Him

    1. Well now we know who doesn’t read my links.

      1. The more I think about it, Warty, the more I’m thinking you should be more thoughtful. And you know what that means…

        1. It’s cute that you assume a Warty has an anal orifice.

          1. He has two, actually.

            1. Also, yes.

      2. I knew it was too good to be true. In my defense, I was pushing a Prowler when you posted that.

  38. Have some more bullshit.

    As you have probably heard, today is Sequester Day, when the Austerity Badger sneaks into America and sets our money on fire. In truth, austerity is here already.

    The higher payroll tax, along with the sequester budget cuts that will start to kick in on Friday, and other lingering effects of the “fiscal cliff” that loomed at the start of the year, will cut economic growth this year by 1.5 percent. But economic growth has already been hampered for the past two years by the government’s biggest spending cutback since the end of the Vietnam war, as the New York Times pointed out earlier this week. We entered the age of austerity long before the sequester.

    2009 2,104,989 3,517,677 -1,412,688
    2010 2,162,724 3,456,213 -1,293,489
    2011 2,303,466 3,603,061 -1,299,595
    2012 estimate 2,468,599 3,795,547 -1,326,948

    1. Where are they getting this? I know they’re not speaking English, but I have no idea what they’re actually saying. What does “spending cutback” mean to the partisan scumbag mind?

      1. I think they’re cutting entitlements and welfare out of the equation. But that’s ridiculous, cause these are the same people who are telling us that food stamps are the most effective form of stimulus.

        1. So…they’re bitching that the stimulus ended? Is that it?

          1. Except, according to them, it didn’t.

    2. This is the dawning of the age of austerity, the age of austeriteeeeee,

    1. About time somebody posted an actual useful link around here.

      1. They just killed the Roissy link. That’s the first time I’ve seen them do that. Granted, this ain’t the place, and that commentor was a pain in the ass, but I’ve never seen anything cleared from here for crudity.

        1. Meh. After I actually read the thing, I wish I hadn’t wasted the time.

        2. It was American. I think they just delete him whenever he pops up, under the assumption that he’ll be an idiot.

          I’m a little surprised they deleted him for posting something sexist when he was posting absurd racist garbage last night. You’d think they would have hit him then.

  39. An amazing chart explaining the presidential election:


    1. Fuck off, sockpuppet.

      1. Ha! Sorry, Coeus, that was not directed at you. Goodbye, sockpuppet.

  40. “Americans are hanging on to their money as they feel the squeeze from higher payroll taxes. Who’d’ve thunk? “

    They’re all greedy 1%ers who don’t want to pay their Fair Share, ESPECIALLY the small business fatcats and those greedy Middle Class robber barons.

  41. Dude you jsut gotta love them higher taxes, oh yeah.


  42. Your dad could be Michael Jordan!

  43. $10 million home

    Designed and built by Pacer Signature Homes, the property comes with great family spaces, such as a nanny suite and a home theatre (complete with projection screen, starlight ceiling and leather lounge chairs). Non-kid features include a beautifully crafted wine-tasting room, a men’s parlour (hmmm, would that be a poker room? Just sayin’), a bar and games room, a full spa and a yoga/dance studio.

  44. OMG!!! The sequester will destroy a generation of science!!!

    “I think the suddenness of it and the depth of it would be a disaster for research, which is not an activity that you can turn on and off from year to year. It’s an activity that takes time. The most impacted are the young, new investigator scientists, who are coming into science, and will now abandon the field of science. There will be a generational gap created.”

    1. Shit I just heard some lame person at Northwestern say the same thing about Cancer research…with Dick Durbin the backgroung…fucking talking points.

  45. As of this afternoon, the total combined national debt has now increased over six trillion dollars since that rueful day that Block Insane Yomomma took office. Six trillion, in just 4.1 years!!

    Four billion in debt a day, every day, is all he asks, bitches. Enjoy the next four years.

  46. Workplace bullying laws are the new go-to for frivolous lawsuits.

    A quick note. Many of these new laws have “socially ostracizing” as a suable offense.

    1. Finally, it’s time for libertarians to get rich off of feminists and the disabled.

  47. Manning is worthless. Screw him.

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