A.M. Links: Joe Biden Coming Guns a Blazing, White House to Miss Deadline to Submit Budget, Afghanistan Wants U.S. Special Forces Out

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  • not exactly a beretta

    Joe Biden has 19 "executive actions" for the president to take on guns, because Joe Biden means business  is full of it.

  • Meanwhile, the White House informed House Budget Chair Paul Ryan that the president will miss the February 4 legal deadline to submit a budget. 
  • Ben Bernanke wants the debt ceiling raised; the Federal Reserve chair says it doesn't create new deficits or spending.
  • The Afghanistan government wants U.S. special forces training local police to be part of this spring's drawdown plans, which comes as news to the U.S.
  • George P. Bush has raised $1.3 million in two months. He's considering running for Texas Land Commissioner in 2014.
  • Barack Obama's half-brother is running for governor in Kenya.

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Ed Krayewski is a former associate editor at Reason.

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  1. Karl Hungus

    Gov. Rick Scott of Florida, during his 2010 campaign, adopts a dog from a rescue oganization, names it Reagan, then returns it after he’s sworn in.

    1. That dog wouldn’t hunt.

    2. Killazontherun

      Screwed the pooch.

  2. Joe Biden has 19 “executive actions” for the president to take on guns…

    If Obama doesn’t follow through, it will be the House Republicans’ fault.

    1. sarcasmic

      A nineteen inch executive action?

    2. Rich

      The executive actions could include giving the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention authority to conduct national research on guns, more aggressive enforcement of existing gun laws and pushing for wider sharing of existing gun databases among federal and state agencies …. The White House declined to comment on the details

      Brace yourselves for the rioting when Stockman proceeds with impeachment. Then the details could include martial law.

      1. What’s with the whole “national research on guns” business? I think I saw some gun-control advocate saying something about how good it would be, and I don’t yet know what it’s like, code for or whatever.

        1. Rich

          Since we have “an epidemic of gun violence”, the CDC is legitimately involved.

          1. Killazontherun

            Mere metaphors used to expand the mission of a state agency. What a sick joke.

        2. Brett L

          Stimulus! Everyone (except us) is in favor of more CDC/NIH/NIMH/NSF funding! Otherwise Chinese engineers will take all our jerbs!

        3. Karl Hungus

          What’s with the whole “national research on guns” business? I think I saw some gun-control advocate saying something about how good it would be, and I don’t yet know what it’s like, code for or whatever

          I simply assume that it’s all code for the eventual confiscation of all privately owned guns. Every single thing they do is in furtherance toward that goal.

          1. Well I assume it’s some stupid evil bullshit also, but I want to know what they think they’re going to research. I assume they’re not going to research guns, which is what they say, but gun violence? Gun crime? Or maybe they are going to research guns–ballistics testing?

            1. gaijin

              Maybe they will research who has guns…what type of mental imbalance one must have to want one, and what ‘treatments’ can be mandated to cure one of gun fever.

            2. They’re going to research how they can fudge the numbers to fit their argument for more gun control.

              See my post below.

            3. Suthenboy

              Probably looking at how many and in who’s hands. That would be my guess, trying to compile a list. Then they will attempt to morph it into some kind of registration scheme.

            4. Karl Hungus

              Well I assume it’s some stupid evil bullshit also, but I want to know what they think they’re going to research.

              Probably which costmetic features can be banned wiouth pissing too many people off and costing the Dems too many seats in 2014.

              1. Karl Hungus

                Probably which costmetic features can be banned wiouth pissing too many people off and costing the Dems too many seats in 2014.

                *without

          2. Number 2

            It’s code for “more government-funded jobs for college professors, consultants and ‘experts’ who make their living on government-funded jobs, and who return the favor by providing political and financial support for statist politicians who provide them with government-funded jobs.”

          3. R C Dean

            By giving it to the CDC, they are legitimizing “gun violence” as a public health issue and further eroding the link between criminal use of guns and personal responsibility.

            Yes, to lay the cultural groundwork for more restrictions and ultimately confiscation.

            1. Blah, that’s about as stupid as what I figured.

          4. hamilton

            I have a FB friend (scientist) who posted this. On the one hand, the theory is the NRA clamped down on such research and now is pointing to the lack of it to make their case.

            On the other hand, the petition is submitted by a number of such researchers. I’m always suspicious of any group that suggests that the solution to a problem is to give lots more money to that specific group.

        4. Well, the Atlantic has stepped in to answer my question.

          But what the gun lobby wants is more good guys — normal average citizens like teachers and movie theater patrons — to have more guns. That is why it has been fighting since the mid-1990s to block any science that might show the costs of lots of good guys having lots of guns might outweigh the benefits.

          Facepalm. Guess how much I care about the “costs of lots of good guys having lots of guns”?

      2. An0nB0t

        Institutes widespread nudie scanning at airports complete with retaliatory gropings/sexual assaults for opt outs and generally pissy travelers? Not a big deal.

        Murders two Americans sans trial, including a child whom he originally claimed to be an adult? Kills hundreds more foreigners via secretive, unchecked murder-drone program? Crickets, is reelected in a landslide.

        Hints at (latest) illegal executive action, this time over guns? Impeach him! Mass panic, screaming and crying, and I can’t buy so much as a Buckmark without dealing with a six-month backlog.

        I’ll take impeachment of the worst president since Nixon (which is probably giving this dunderheaded thug too much credit–worst since FDR is more like it) wherever I can get it, but you’re a little slow on the draw, boys.

        1. That was a damning and example filled jeremiad. Moar please.

          1. An0nB0t

            If tha con-sta-too-shun’s been breached, you must impeach!

      3. The executive actions could include giving the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention authority to conduct national research on guns, more aggressive enforcement of existing gun laws and pushing for wider sharing of existing gun databases among federal and state agencies

        So does this mean the indepth CDC research on child molestation and dog-fucking has been concluded?

        1. I believe that is an ongoing effort.

      4. Francisco d Anconia

        If Obama does ANYTHING to limit 2A rights it will be his undoing. You think the Tea Party movement was something? Try 150M rednecks marching on Washington…

        No, he’s backing himself into a corner on this. If he pursues it he WILL lose the Senate. He must know that?

      5. Mike M.

        It’s about time that someone finally started standing up to this piece of crap.

    3. Cdr Lytton

      But Biden did indicate that the remains of the Obama campaign apparatus may be activated in the effort.

      “He said that this has been a real focus on the policy and that the politics of this issue, that a strategy on the politics of the issue hasn’t been undertaken yet,” Rep. Jackie Speier (D-Calif.) told POLITICO. “He did remind us that the campaign infrastructure is still accessible.”

      Outstanding legislative approach!

      1. thom

        This stuff is straight out of Hugo Chavez’s playbook.

        1. Let’s just hope it ends in a cancer-induced coma during the second term as well.

          1. fish

            Sloop, in my darkest moments you still manage to bring joy!

            Well done sir!

            1. Even with SugarFree in our lives, there’s still a ray of hope.

              1. Zing!

      2. Suthenboy

        I am lost. The campaign infrastructure can be accessed for what purpose?
        Most of the time I can see what these slimy evil fuckers are up to, but since I just dont think like they do I am sometimes mystified, or maybe I am just slow.

        Of what possible use could the campaign infrastructure be for an office holder who is term-limited out?

        1. thom

          Turn the mob against your enemies.

          1. T

            Yeah, but in this case ‘your enemies’ is all the guys with guns. I’m thinking the mob comes off poorly if you actually incite them to action here.

            1. thom

              We’re still at the point where those guys with guns are still powerless against the other guys with guns. Obama’s guys. It’s a war of words right now, and while it remains that way, turning out your mob to disarm your enemies makes a lot of sense.

            2. Tulpa (LAOL-PA)

              Since he’s not running again, they’re expendable.

        2. MJGreen

          Get them to push for the repeal of the 22nd amendment?

        3. Tulpa (LAOL-PA)

          BO’s campaign infrastructure was heavily involved in the protests against Walker’s union bills in Wisconsin, for instance. Siccing them on state legislatures etc wouldn’t be unprecedented.

  3. Lessons from France on Defending Marriage
    http://www.thepublicdiscourse.com/2013/01/7601/

    The international press was shocked on November 17, 2012, when hundreds of thousands of French citizens took to the streets to fight against a parliamentary bill redefining marriage to include same-sex relationships and legalizing same-sex adoption. Less than a decade ago, France symbolized all that American conservatives despised and all that American liberals praised. Now we should learn from them.

    1. Restoras

      I move that we never, ever attempt to learn anything from the French, except how to make cheese and calvados.

      1. And Norman-style cider.

      2. John

        And Pate and Frois Gras, and wine and about a million other things.

        1. We already know how to make those things better than they do.

          1. John

            No we don’t. You clearly have never been to France or if you have, you didn’t go to the right places.

            1. No kidding!

            2. Generic Stranger

              I see John is a Chateau de Cul kind of guy.

            3. Actually I’ve been there many times, and am going again in about two weeks.

              Maybe you just don’t know where to get decent stuff in the states? Or you’ve succumbed to the ‘advertising’ campaign.

              You probably think German beer is better than American beer and Italian pizza is the best you can find.

              1. The Italians don’t make deep dish, do they?

                1. Restoras

                  That’s not pizza.

              2. John

                I don’t think German beer is better than American beer, I know it is. German beer isn’t made by hipsters who think dumping ten times the normal hops into the recipe is giving it flavor. To the extent that a few American beers are better than German beers, that is only because the German beer you have here is imported and has preservatives and not strictly subject to the purity laws. German beer consumed in Germany, along with Czech beer consumed in the Czech republic is better than anything produced here.

                1. Some of us have the good taste not to drink beer at all. :-p

                  1. Evan from Evansville

                    @Ted. S.

                    That’s the dumbest fucking thing I’ve ever heard.

                  2. Francisco d Anconia

                    Some of us have the good taste not to drink beer at all.

                    That’s wrong on so many levels, I know not where to start.

                  3. I used to think the same way, Ted. If you think drinking beer is not in good taste, I suggest you have never really drank a good beer. Have a Three Philosophers, a St. Bernardus Quad or a Cherry-Rye Barreled Goose Island Bourbon County Stout and we’ll talk.

                    1. Oh, I was’nt entirely serious by a long shot. In point of fact, I don’t like carbonated beverages, so I don’t drink beer or cola.

                      The other part of my comment was a response to the inevitable long long wall of posts from commenters trying to one-up each other in showing off their obscure taste in beer. It’s much the same thing we see when a thread turns to guns or computer games.

                2. robc

                  To the extent that a few American beers are better than German beers, that is only because the German beer you have here is imported and has preservatives and not strictly subject to the purity laws.

                  Shut the fuck up John, you dont know what you are talking about in that sentence.

                  The imported German beer is the exact* same as brewed for consumption in Germany. It just isnt as fresh, which is why it pales in comparison to the same thing in Germany. Ditto for Czech Pilsners and most British beers too.

                  The high alcohol Belgians hold up better, as they arent meant to be drunk fresh.

                  *with some exceptions, that are made for export only. But I dont think we are discussing things like Uerige Doppelsticke.

                3. I don’t know John. While I agree the proliferation of nasty hophead craft beers is overboard, I think there are plenty American versions of the German and Belgian stuff that matches or improves on the originals. I actually prefer Live Oak Primus to Schneider Aventinus, Weihenstephaner Vitus or Erdinger Pikantus, for one of many examples.

                4. RFID

                  While John is entitled to his own opinion on which beer suits his palate, he isnt entitled to his own facts. And the fact is that the german “purity law” is full of shit and NO ONE follows it.

                  The purity law of 1516 (the one everyione in Germany claims to follow) allows three ingredients for beer: water, hops, and barley. Youll notice that cultivated yeast isnt included in the law and cannot be used if you are taking the law seriously. Wheat is also not allowed and in fact was the entire reason the law was created in the first place. keep that in mind the next time someone tells you how awesome the purity law is while nursing a hefe.

                  Other things not allowed include salting your water (hope you have good brewing water locally!), any sort of clarifier, no spices or refined sugar, no fruit, and no hop substitutes (yarrow, etc), and no added bacteria for “bugged” beer. Many ancient styles of beer made in the north of Germany were wiped out by this law. I would liked to have tried them, but I guess Germans preferred their bland piss yellow lagers.

                  1. robc

                    Most of what you said about the purity law is right, but then you add the last sentence and make yourself look like a moron.

                    Also, there is a brewpub in Vienna called 1516, named after the Bavarian purity law. They specialize in american style craft beer and breaking the “law” as much as possible.

                    Note: The EU has banned enforcement of the purity law in Germany. It hasnt been the law for more than a decade now.

                5. heller

                  Both America and Germany have monumental beers. I don’t think it’s possible to determine which country’s beer is “better.”

                  1. heller

                    I think a better discussion would be which country has the best styles of beer. In my opinion, that would be Belgium.

                6. Belgian Trappists disagree.

              3. mr simple

                I’m sure there are American beers that are better than some beers made in Germany, but the best American beers cannot stand up to the best German beers.

                1. Restoras

                  Dude, German beer is not even close to being better than American beer. On this you are dead wrong.

                  1. John

                    Restoras, you are nuts. American beer has been totally ruined by the fucking obsession with hops. Hops are to American beer making what disco was to popular music in 1979, a decent idea that was taken way too far and eventually ruined everything.

                    1. thom

                      “American beer has been totally ruined by the fucking obsession with hops.”

                      And German beer has been ruined by their fucking obsession with “purity”.

                    2. John

                      Purity just makes it taste better and gives you much less of a hangover. Who would want that?

                    3. robc

                      Purity prevents creativity.

                      Look at Belgium.

                    4. thom

                      “Purity”, as defined by the Germans, just makes all their beer taste the same. It will give you the same hangover as an American lager.

                    5. Restoras

                      American beer has been totally ruined by the fucking obsession with hops.

                      Ok, so there is a fad in American brewing with regard to IPAs. So what. Some of them are excellent. No one is making you drink them, are they?

                    6. Francisco d Anconia

                      IPAs BLOW ASS!

                    7. Exactly, IPAs are terrible and I hate hoppy beers, but I still drink lots of fine American craft brews that stand up to anything coming out of Europe.

                    8. Francisco d Anconia

                      Goddamn. Two days in a row, I’m forced to side with John. It hurts, man. 😉

                    9. robc

                      Anti-IPA people are like anti-merlot people.

                      You and John should make a movie about how you hate fucking merlot.

                      Considering how much that movie blew, I think I win the insult awards for today.

                    10. IPAs suck, specifically when they’re made with cascade hops. Why the hell would anyone want to drink a beer that tastes like pine needles and grapefruit at the same time?

                    11. heller

                      IPAs are awesome. My favorite hop strain is Citra. You get really bold tropical notes like papaya.

                2. BigT

                  Blind taste tests have shown Am beers to be as good as German beers. When it comes to brewing and winemaking, the Earth is flat. Except for smugness.

                  1. John

                    BigT

                    Is it possible to make an American beer as good as the best German beer? Sure. The problem is we don’t because the American palate is fucked up and think everything must be bitter.

                    1. robc

                      The problem is we don’t because the American palate is fucked up and think everything must be bitter.

                      You need to drink more American beer then, because you are missing out.

                      Have you tried any Metropolitan or New Glarus?

                      Metro is a german-style brewer. NG is mostly lagers, and rarely (never?) hoppy.

                      New Glarus is one of the larger craft breweries in the US. Despite this fact, they dont distribute outside Wisconsin, so you may have to travel to find some.

                    2. I wept the day New Glarus disappeared from IL shelves. I go on cross border beer raids a couple of times a year. Goes well with the sausage and cheese pillaging.

                    3. Killazontherun

                      Heh. I wasn’t around yesterday due to a cross boarder raid. In this case I skipped right over Virginia and put down three hundred bucks to restock the non moonshine portion of my liquor cabinet. All of that just to avoid dealing with public employees, and it was well worth it.

                    4. I don’t know who you’re speaking for. Most American craft breweries make styles of beer besides IPAs. I don’t get the IPA fad, but have you never had anything from Ommegang, Goose Island, Allagash, Founders, Victory or The Lost Abbey?

                  2. R C Dean

                    Personally, I think we have reached Peak Beer. There are so many variations and styles and brewers that its impossible to generalize about “American” beer and “German” beer.

                    There is only beer. And the best of it made in each country is very, very good.

                    1. RC: Except Canada. I think we can all agree on that.

                    2. Hey, Unibroue is pretty good.

                    3. Killazontherun

                      La Fin du Monde

                      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/La_Fin_du_Monde

                  3. Ding ding ding. John just proved what I suspected: a willing ‘victim’ of the international branding campaign.

                    1. John

                      Gee Whiterun, why would I possibly think that the now 10th Version of super hop triple IPA might be bitter?

                      I have tasted all of these things. And for my palate German beers are just better. If you like your beers crammed with hops or made with some other funky kind of flavoring, have at American micro brews. I don’t. So I prefer German beers. There is no marketing about it. When American brewers try to make German style beers, they don’t do it as well as the best Germans.

                    2. the local brewery, Founders, is hops mad. I prefer the nearby New Holland Brewery.

                    3. heller

                      You live next to Founders? They have some good shit (Kentucky Breakfast Stout is uber-hyped, and for good reason).

                    4. Yeah, you. You have your opinion. You’re more than welcome to it.

                      Then you make an ass of yourself when you say GERMAN BEERS ARE BETTER THAN AMERICAN BEERS OMG.

                      Plus there are plenty of good non-bitter American beers. Texas has some really good lagers that are easily as good as anything I ever had in Germany.

                      Sounds like you just don’t want to go looking for anything good, and just trust some vacation you had a decade ago to make all your future decisions for you.

                    5. John

                      No Whiterun Guard. It sounds like you either drink and eat all of the wrong things when you are overseas or you are just a jingoist who can’t admit any foreigners can ever do anything better than us Americans.

                      There is something to the French concept (that they apply to wine) called terrior. The place affects food and drink. The small differences in the ingredients and how it is done add up to make a difference be it food or beer or whatever. No matter how hard you try, the Dim Sum in New York isn’t the Dim Sum in Hong Kong. The barbeque in Philadelphia isn’t the barbeque in Austin even if the guy making it is from there and doing it right. Same goes with beer.

                    6. Oh, I see, because they have magical unicorn fairy dust, my taste buds work differently depending on where I’m at.

                      Got it.

                    7. John

                      No. Your taste buds work the same. The stuff just tastes different depending on where it was produced.

                    8. $park?

                      No Whiterun Guard. It sounds like you either drink and eat all of the wrong things when you are overseas or you are just a jingoist who can’t admit any foreigners can ever do anything better than us Americans.

                      You’re both retards.

                      Whiterun is a retard for arguing with John about something he’s clearly an expert on.

                      John is a retard for continuing to argue with someone who’s proven he’s a retard.

                    9. I’m not retarded you jerk. I may be a communist, a Phish Phan, and mentally retarded, but I am NOT a communist.

                    10. I can assure you, as a wine connisseur and one that spends a fair bit of time in wine country, average California red is every bit as good as average French red. And at a similar price point, I might add.

                      The microclimates of the various California regions and the soil content make them superior growing regions to their French counterparts in many cases and with several varietals. It’s a fact that’s proven time and again in competitions.

                      Now I have to head out the door and I’d love to continue this conversation, but I’ve got a meeting in Paso Robles in 3 hours and I have to be out the door. Perhaps I’ll stop by one of the several wineries while there and pick up a few bottles of 92+ wine for under $30 each.

                    11. John

                      Be quiet sloopy, whiterun guard has informed us all that place and climate where it is produced can never affect how something tastes.

                    12. My comment belonged further downthread. I was referring to this:

                      John| 1.15.13 @ 9:39AM |#|?|filternamelinkcustom

                      Our best wine is just as good. Our average wine is not even close.

                      And I just have to say, as someone in the know, I totally disagree with the second part.

                    13. John

                      Sloopy,

                      I don’t think I would call the stuff you are buying in Pasa Robles “average American wine” even if you are only paying $25 a bottle for it. Maybe “average California wine” is as good as “average French”. But average American? No way.

                    14. Average California wine is average American wine, John.

                      Or does a state that makes 90% of a product not get to consider itself the average maker of it?

                      You can go ahead and walk back from this cliff at least. I don’t know enough about beer to get in on that argument so I’ll leave it alone, but on this one you’re dead wrong.

                    15. John

                      So sloopy, any wine that costs under $30 is average no matter how good it is? Again that stuff you are buying, while great I am sure, is not average. Sure 90% of the product is made in California. And how much of that 90% is five dollar Earnest and Julio Gallo or such? A whole lot.

                    16. $park?

                      Be quiet sloopy, whiterun guard has informed us all that place and climate where it is produced can never affect how something tastes.

                      Yeah, sloopy. John has already informed us that things made in France and Germany are incomparably better than things made in the US.

                    17. $park?

                      Then you make an ass of yourself when you say GERMAN BEERS ARE BETTER THAN AMERICAN BEERS OMG.

                      Come on, man, it’s what he does. You know this.

                    18. Suthenboy

                      I thought all of the american beer makers were….germans. Mostly anyway. I dont know shit about beer.

                    19. PS

                      German beer consumed in Germany, along with Czech beer consumed in the Czech republic is better than anything produced here.

                      Well, it’s been a long time since I’ve spent much time in the States but I can’t imagine the beer has gotten worse. Local microbeer stuff could be quite good.

                      Czech beer is obviously good, but there’s little variety. There’s good pilsener, cheap mediocre pilsener, and a dark beer which is sweeter and mostly drunk by girls. That’s pretty much it. Is it better than American beer? Naw, I don’t think that’s a fair statement. Better on average, perhaps.

                    20. John

                      Czechs don’t have variety. Is a Czech pilsener drank there so it doesn’t have to travel or be subject to the FDA better than a pilsener drunk here, definitely. A lot of that has to do with laws. In the US everything has to be made to have a shelf life of forever and be safe for five year old kids to drink 30 gallons a day of it for a hundred years.

                    21. So now it’s fairy dust and anti-freeze which make Czech beer so good. Got it.

                    22. John

                      What are you even talking about Whiterun Guard? Have you lost the argument that badly? There is a reason why really well made home brewed beer tastes better than even the best stuff you buy, it is because it is fresh and hasn’t been transported for hundreds of miles and doesn’t have any preservatives. The same is true for all beers. A Guinness from even the best pup in the US tastes like charcoal compared to what it tastes like in Ireland. And I am pretty sure they actually brew the stuff here. Why does it taste better over there? The only theory I can come up with is the US makes them put preservatives in it where the EU doesn’t.

                      The same is true of German beers. German beers taste about half as good when consumed in the US as they do when consumed in Germany. Distance is not beer’s friend.

                    23. PS

                      The same is true of German beers. German beers taste about half as good when consumed in the US as they do when consumed in Germany. Distance is not beer’s friend.

                      When was the last time you were in Germany? I’m not that impressed with German beers, but I haven’t spent much time there, admittedly. My impression was that they’ve lost much of their pub culture and most of the small craft breweries were consolidated or went bankrupt. But I’m no expert at all.

                    24. John

                      Last time I was in Germany was December of 2008. It has been four years. But I found the stuff to be just as good. But I really love wheat beers. And I can never find an American brewer that does them well. They are either too bitter or too damn sweat.

                    25. Restoras

                      But I really love wheat beers. And I can never find an American brewer that does them well.

                      I agree with you on this. Of course, at some point American brewers will get over their love of hops and switch to wheat, at which point you are likely to…do something.

                    26. robc

                      Guess what my flagship beer is gonna be?

                      The problem with most American wheats is just that, they are American wheat beer isntead of hefeweizens. The use of a hefe yeast is mandatory, IMO.

                      Using something neutral like Chico yeast, which is fine for a pale ale or IPA, is just horrible in a wheat beer. And using an alt yeast (Im looking right at you, Widmer Hefeweizen) is just as bad. And worse in that case, when they lie about it and call the beer a hefeweizen.

                      Gumballhead is the exception, in that they throw a bunch of hops at it, to make it something completely different. Even so, I think it would be better with a hefe yeast.

                    27. Guess what my flagship beer is gonna be?

                      I am willing to taste-test as much beer as necessary to work toward the goal of a good American Hefeweizen.

                    28. Try Live Oak if you can find it where you live. It’s rated #2 on Beer Advocate after Weihenstephaner and before any other German hefe.

                    29. That is a campaign I think I could support too.

                    30. Live Oak from Austin. Their hefe and weizenbock both beat most German versions in those styles I’ve ever had, and many beer experts agree with me.

                    31. T

                      As a side note Guinness changes what they do for country of destination, so yeah, American Guinness tastes different from Irish Guinness by design.

                    32. robc

                      I cant keep track, but I think American Guinness is brewed in Canada.

                      But yeah, Guinness has about 7 or so different versions.

                    33. John, nobody here agrees with you. I love some German beers to death, like Franziskaner Dark and Schneider Aventinus. However there are American versions in that style available that match these in quality. Many German beer styles that aren’t hefeweizens or weizenbocks are boring and bland, and they don’t do the experimentation with barrelling, diverse yeast, diverse flavors, etc. that happens here or in Belgium.

                    34. John

                      So some German beers are not as good as others? So what. That doesn’t mean the good ones are not better than what is made here. German beer in Germany is just better than even the best American beer.

                      I go back to Rob’s question above, show me an American Heffe that is as good as the best German ones? Still waiting for answer and I will be waiting a long time because their isn’t one.

                    35. robc

                      John,

                      On the other hand, show me a German made IPA as good as Bell’s Two Hearted.

                      American’s are much closer to Germans in German-styled beer than the other way around.

                    36. No John, you missed the point. Since German purity laws limit the amount of experimentation they can do for German-style beers, they can’t match the variations American brewers can on German-style beers. My primary and best homebrew recipe is a Ginger-Apricot-Honey Hefeweizen. I’ve had multiple beer aficionados say it’s one of the best beers they’ve ever had, and I agree with them. I’ve never seen a German brewery add fruit, adjuncts and spices to their beers like they do in Belgium or America. German beers prove that simplicity can be a virtue and make some amazing beers, but American brewers also make plenty of quality, minimalist German-style beers as proven by the top rated German style beers on Beer Advocate and elsewhere.

                    37. PS

                      Well Pilsner Urquell in a bottle tastes different in the States than it does here. Not bad, just different, not as hearty, like a desitku (10 degree) rather than a dvanactku (12 degree).

                      Also, I think the best Czech beer is probably Bernard, but that may be because its harder to get here in Prague than the big ones.

                      http://www.bernard.cz/en/index.shtml

                    38. PS

                      I have no idea what the laws are about exporting/importing but it seems from the taste that they change the recipe for the American.

                      It seems that everything in America is an ale, which also gets old, but it’s a nice changeup for me when I visit.

                    39. John

                      PS,

                      The beer tastes differently here. For the worse I think. I am not sure if it is that they change it to fit perceived American tastes or if the FDA makes them add things.

                    40. PS

                      The beer tastes differently here. For the worse I think. I am not sure if it is that they change it to fit perceived American tastes or if the FDA makes them add things.

                      Its different for sure, but a hell of a variety. Is there anything that can beat a Pilsner Urquell in a Czech pub or a Guiness in an Irish one? Ehhrrmmm, maybe not, but it’s a big damn country, and I’m no expert.

                    41. robc

                      The beer tastes differently here. For the worse I think. I am not sure if it is that they change it to fit perceived American tastes or if the FDA makes them add things.

                      As I said above (or below, who knows with stupid fucking threading), you are wrong. Way wrong.

                      If it tastes different, it is a freshness issue. A boat trip isnt kind to beer.

                    42. American breweries are a lot more creative than anywhere outside Belgium (and have an even broader diversity). You can find quality beers in just about every style under the sun made in America. Yes, this experimentalism means there’s also a lot of crap, but there’s no doubt there’s a renaissance happening.

                    43. robc

                      I thought all of the american beer makers were….germans. Mostly anyway. I dont know shit about beer.

                      They were until about 1975.

                      The craft beer market has changed that. All the old school breweries are of German descent.

                    44. So a super triple IPA is the average American craft beer? Most breweries make one or two because it’s trendy for some inexplicable reason, but most craft breweries make quality beers in other styles too.

                3. robc

                  but the best American beers cannot stand up to the best German beers.

                  eh.

                  Im going to argue both side of this, because you all are all wrong.

                  The best American made German style beers cant hang with the best German beers. But the best American beers arent German styled, and kick the ass of the best German made American style beers.

                  Which is better, the best American beer or the best German beer? Hard to say, depends what mood Im in. Overall, Americans do better in more styles than anyone else, so I give the “all-around” award to America. Even if we dont win many individual events.

                  1. John

                    The best American made German style beers cant hang with the best German beers. But the best American beers arent German styled, and kick the ass of the best German made American style beers.

                    Rob gets it right.

              4. robc

                You probably think German beer is better than American beer

                Name an American hefeweizen better than Weihenstephaner.

                Im waiting….

                Metro in Chicago makes a damn good Alt, but I will take the Altstadt brewers over it any day, you know, if I could get it fresh, like if I was in Dusseldorf.

                And Im planning a trip (very loose planning, right now) to the Upper Palatinate to try as many Zoigls as I can (probably 5, as that is how many zoigl towns are left, or maybe it is 6).

                1. Live Oak’s hefe is pretty darn good. According to BeerAdvocate, Weihenstephaner is #1, followed by four American hefes before it gets back to German beers.

                  1. robc

                    2 of those 4 have low sample sizes, which I tend to ignore on BA.

                    But I have had the Dancing Man at #3, and it is very good, but its no Weihenstephaner.

                    Sierra Nevada Kellerweis at #10 is also very good. I blind tested my hefe against it last summer (not me tasting, but a group of others) and mine slightly defeated SN. At a comp, it was compared directly to Schneider Weisse, which I took as high praise.

                    1. That is high praise. I want to try yours!

                      8 of the top 15 doppelbocks were American or Canadian. 7 of the top 15 Bocks were American. 12 of the top 15 Dortmunders were American. 9 of the top 15 eisbocks were American or Canadian. 13 of the top 15 German-style logers were American. 13 of the top 15 Maibocks were American. I can go on. You can argue that American reviewers have never tasted the real thing and are uniformed about the “best”, but since we’re not in Germany, isn’t that kind of irrelevant when we’re debating John’s point? There are obviously tons of American beers that compete with the German imports.

                    2. John

                      Proprietist,

                      The German beers don’t taste the same here. American versions of those beers probably are better in some cases than the German beer as it is sold in the US. But take away home field advantage, I am still going with the German versions.

                    3. As nice as it would be to blind-taste-test the best American versions and the best authentic German versions side-by-side super-fresh at the source, I doubt very many of us have had the privilege of doing so. We live in America, and therefore we have to compare the quality of domestic versions vs. the quality of German imports. With that in mind, the domestics match or exceed the imports, preservatives/stylistic changes or no.

                    4. robc

                      Proprietist,

                      The problem is that BA is american weighted, so the small German breweries dont get included/reveiwed.

                      Im not disagreeing with you, of course, just not using that as evidence.

                      It does prove that John’s “all american craft is hop heavy” bullshit is bullshit.

                    5. I agree robc, but a.) we live in America so we are only able to compare the quality of domestics to the German imports available here, and b.) your final sentence is my point.

                    6. heller

                      I’m surprised everyone here is obsessed with the Germans. The real beer rivalry is between the U.S. and Belgium. Germans generally aren’t interested in making newer, better beers.

                    7. I’m of the belief that Belgian and German beer have more consistently high quality than American beers, but then I really like those styles the best. However, America has plenty of high or higher quality examples in those styles even if you have to dig through a glut of mediocre or errantly experimental attempts to find them.

                      For the record, my favorite beer in the whole world is New Belgium’s Cocoa Mole, a porter with chocolate, three kinds of chili pepper and spices that wouldn’t be found anywhere in Europe as far as I know. There are lots of quality American versions of Belgian and German styles, but very few vice versa.

                    8. heller

                      I love just about everything that comes out of New Belgium. I used to buy ton’s of their Mothership Witte, but it’s retired now,

                    9. robc

                      we live in America so we are only able to compare the quality of domestics to the German imports available here

                      There are these new devices, called autogyro or something similar, that allows one to fly thru the air like a bird, and visit distant lands like Prussia and Siam.

                      So we can have both the American and German beers at the source. Just not at the same time.

                    10. Right, but if they aren’t side by side, blind taste tests, how can we be sure our taste bud memory or our preconceptions based on one’s current location aren’t deceiving us?

        2. Jerry on the road

          Movies?

          1. alittlesense

            Please no….they think Jerry Lewis is a genius auteur or somthing.

            1. John

              But they did make Catherine Deneuve and Eva Green.

          2. I like the early new wave Cinema – Godard especially.

            1. Jerry on the road

              I can’t stand Godard and the Tati clan. Chabrol, Lelouch and Verneuil at least made real movies.

              1. HG Clouzot.

        3. Restoras

          Our wine is just as good if not better than the Froggies.

          1. John

            Our best wine is just as good. Our average wine is not even close.

      3. We know how to make good cheese. Great cheese even. We just regulate ourselves out of the ability to do it.

        For the children.

        1. We know how to make good cheese. Great cheese even. We just regulate ourselves out of the ability to do it.

          This. Banning unpasteurized milk in the making of cheese is a fucking crime against humanity.

      4. I dunno, I like 19th century French literature.

        1. $park?

          Figures.

          1. What, you don’t like Dumas? That’s offensive.

            1. What, you don’t like Dumas? That’s offensive.

              His Celebrated Crimes volumes are my favorites.

              1. I’ve read The Count of Monte Cristo and all of The Three Musketeers books multiple times. The unabridged versions, which are eleventy billion pages long.

            2. $park?

              I’ve never read a bit of 19th century French literature. I suppose that makes me some kind of jingoist jerk.

              1. I highly recommend that you read The Count of Monte Cristo, which is a great book.

                1. $park?

                  It’s not really my genre. I’m just not big into historical fiction. I just can’t get into it, no matter how well written.

                  1. lap83

                    The Count of Monte Cristo isn’t historical fiction. It wasn’t set in the past when it was written. Unless you mean you don’t like anything written before now, which is pretty inept.

                    1. $park?

                      The story takes place in France, Italy, islands in the Mediterranean, and in the Levant during the historical events of 1815?1838 (from just before the Hundred Days to the reign of Louis-Philippe of France). The historical setting is a fundamental element of the book. An adventure story primarily concerned with themes of hope, justice, vengeance, mercy and forgiveness, it focuses on a man who is wrongfully imprisoned, escapes from jail, acquires a fortune and sets about getting revenge on those responsible for his imprisonment. However, his plans have devastating consequences for the innocent as well as the guilty.

                      Sounds like historical fiction to me, fucking tard. Don’t jump in unless you have something useful to say.

                    2. lap83

                      I thought you might find it useful to know what historical fiction means. But if you just like defining literature terms your own way, that’s cool. Good luck with that.

                    3. $park?

                      I like this definition:

                      Historical fiction tells a story that is set in the past. That setting is usually real and drawn from history, and often contains actual historical persons, but the main characters tend to be fictional.

                      I suppose that’s still not correct for some reason or other that makes you a genius and me a dumbass.

                    4. Have you ever read Bester? The Stars My Destination is based on the plot of The Count of Monte Cristo.

                    5. $park?

                      I have actually read that book, though it was years ago for a class. I thought it was interesting, but not fantastic.

                    6. It’s a good thing SF isn’t here. He’d damn you to hell, I think.

        2. Brett L

          Death and prison, eh? 19th century Russian literature is about the same, only with more winter and less prison.

          1. Same answer to you.

  4. Bee Tagger

    Barack Obama’s half-brother is running for governor in Kenya.

    Hawaiians are allowed to hold that high of an office in Kenya?

    1. It’s his half brother. Obviously not the Hawai’ian half.

      1. Rich

        RACIST!

        1. More like half-racist.

          1. Rich

            HATE CRIME!

  5. sarcasmic

    Meanwhile, the White House informed House Budget Chair Paul Ryan that the president will miss the February 4 legal deadline to submit a budget.

    What happens when little people fail to submit paperwork by a federally mandated legal deadline?

    1. Bee Tagger

      Will David Gregory tempt fate twice by holding up a blank sheet of paper representing the unsubmitted budget on television?

      1. It’s not tempting fate when there’s no possibility of repercussions.

  6. George P. Bush has raised $1.3 million in two months. He’s considering running for Texas Land Commissioner in 2014.

    People have blindly donated to a possible campaign for an office to be determined?

    1. Yeah, that kind of startled me too.

      GPB – “I’m thinking of running for…something”

      Donor – “Here, take this large check”

      WTF?

      1. Restoras

        Pre-emptive influence peddling. Also, a fool and his money are soon parted.

        1. Good point – a good, voluntary soaking of some damned fool(s).

      2. It was either that or spend it all on autographed copies of 50 Shades of Grey.

  7. sarcasmic

    Put me on that jury and I’ll vote to acquit.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..oting.html

    1. Karl Hungus

      “They called him a ‘ginger’ and said gingers don’t have souls,’ said Morgan Alldredge, a friend of both Oliver and one of the targets, who was in the classroom during the shooting.”

      Well if his plan was to prove that gingers do, in fact, have souls, he went about it the wrong way.

    2. ‘They called him a “ginger” and said gingers don’t have souls,

      Where have I heard that before? You guys be careful out there.

      1. Pfft. They can’t aim either. Taunting a ginger is like taunting a small child or a woman. A victimless crime.

  8. sarcasmic

    Yummy gingers.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs…..e-win.html
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs…..lobes.html

    1. John

      Chastain needs to wear hose. She is not 18 anymore.

      1. Karl Hungus

        Chastain needs to wear hose. She is not 18 anymore.

        Her legs are slender ahd hairless, and that’s what bothers you. Admit it, John.

      2. sarcasmic

        She looks fine to me.

        1. John

          She looks good, she just has some cheese going on on her thighs and some really droopy tits in that dress. I wouldn’t kick her out of bed though.

          1. MP

            There’s a high bar.

      3. she needs to cut down on the carbs. My wife is 42 and her legs are trimmer than when she was 18.

        1. she needs to cut down on the carbs. My wife is 42 and her legs are trimmer than when she was 18.

          And do squats.

          1. that’s part of her er, routine.

    2. Auric Demonocles

      Yummy gingers.

      I guess I’m not getting any work done today.

      I do like that right below this caption:

      What are they discussing? They seemed to be having an animated conversation

      There is a picture of one of them looking like she’s not paying any attention to the other one.

      1. Brett L

        There is a picture of one of them looking like she’s not paying any attention to the other one.

        So its a normal teenage girl conversation where they talk at elevated speed, pitch, and volume while not listening to each other.

        1. R C Dean

          elevated speed, pitch, and volume while not listening to each other.

          Just like TV pundits?

          1. Brett L

            That’s a bridge too far. At least half of all teenage girls grow out of that stage by their mid 20s.

  9. Keith Ellison: Time for Congress to build a better drone policy
    http://www.washingtonpost.com/…..story.html

    An unmanned U.S. aerial vehicle ? or drone ? reportedly killed eight people in rural Pakistan last week, bringing the estimated death toll from drone strikes in Pakistan this year to 35. As the frequency of drone strikes spikes again, some questions must be asked: How many of those targeted were terrorists? Were any children harmed? And what is the standard of evidence to carry out these attacks? The United States has to provide answers, and Congress has a critical role to play.

    The heart of the problem is that our technological capability has far surpassed our policy. As things stand, the executive branch exercises unilateral authority over drone strikes against terrorists abroad. In some cases, President Obama approves each strike himself through “kill lists.” While the president should be commended for creating explicit rules for the use of drones, unilateral kill lists are unseemly and fraught with hazards.

    1. Shame on the post for publishing an obviously Republican smear piece.

    2. BigT

      Kill first, get authorization later.

    3. So long as Obama kills with joy and enlightenment in his heart, the killing is okay.

    4. Mesteve

      The heart of the problem is that our technological capability has far surpassed our policy

      A bit OT but this is a huge understatement. Laws are way behind the technological advances we’ve made. Not only regarding drones but also IP and 4A in a digital era. Should would be nice to have a congress focused on defending rights under evolving circumstances.

      But instead they’ll debate whether guns are bad, birth control should be free and “fix” ever-growing list of problems that they have created. The best argument for anarchy is the current crop of idiots in power.

    5. Chinny Chin Chin

      While the president should be commended for creating explicit rules for the use of drones…

      You mean the rules he created only when he thought the Mittster would win the election? The rules he clearly didn’t think HE needed?

      Yeah, sure: commend him.

  10. sarcasmic

    Don’t drink the water.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..tival.html

    1. If I want to drink something disgusting and disease-ridden that won’t get me drunk, I’ll drink Mountain Dew.

      1. mr simple

        Eww, I’ll take the crab juice.

  11. sarcasmic

    Another cop story you need to go to foreign media to read.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..t-car.html

  12. sarcasmic

    Cops actually doing their job as peace officers! Shocking!
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..trian.html

    1. Brett L

      After they chased the guy under the cab, the least they could do is lift it off him.

  13. The Afghanistan government wants U.S. special forces training local police to be part of this spring’s drawdown plans…

    Local law enforcement will need target practice.

    1. Someone better bring a lot of dogs…

      1. Someone better bring a lot of dogs…

        I understand there are some available in Memphis.

  14. ObamaCare’s Health-Insurance Sticker Shock
    Thanks to mandates that take effect in 2014, premiums in individual markets will shoot up. Some may double.
    http://online.wsj.com/article/…..on_LEADTop

    Health-insurance premiums have been rising?and consumers will experience another series of price shocks later this year when some see their premiums skyrocket thanks to the Affordable Care Act, aka ObamaCare.

    The reason: The congressional Democrats who crafted the legislation ignored virtually every actuarial principle governing rational insurance pricing. Premiums will soon reflect that disregard?indeed, premiums are already reflecting it.

    1. John

      But we were going to bend the cost curve.

      1. NoVAHockey

        we did. just not in the direction they had us believe.

        1. Auric Demonocles

          No no no. They did bend it. Costs would have quadrupled without Obamacare! It would have been so much worse than they predicted when they were arguing to pass it. They just couldn’t see how bad the situation actually was.

          Also, we need more stimuluz.

          1. “No, fuck you, cut spending.”

      2. Up and Up (with apologies to Target).

    2. OF course, this was fully intended.

      1. Drake

        Unexpectedly, we now need Single Payer to cut costs.

  15. Generic Stranger

    Old cops discover the internet:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v…..LxBKDzuO9g

  16. SugarFree

    The Afghanistan government wants U.S. special forces training local police to be part of this spring’s drawdown plans, which comes as news to the U.S.

    Tulpa is scrambling to learn Pashto in order to defend the inevitable police abuses.

    1. He shouldn’t bother to learn to write it – damned few of them are literate.

      1. I doubt there will be much police abuse (well I mean there will be, but you won’t be able to differentiate it from regular abuse).

        From my experience they don’t wait for the Police Union and Review Board to take action when they vastly outnumber the cops. They’re not Americans.

    2. R C Dean

      Since when do special forces train cops? WTF? Its like hanging the label “special forces” on something is all they care about.

      1. That’s essentially what the Green Beret’s are for.

        One of the poor, flea-scarred Army Vets can correct me if I’m wrong but the idea is you drop a couple of Green Berets into some poorly patrolled bit of an enemy colony and they build a natively manned insurgent army to harass the enemy and mess with their supply lines.

        The Afghan national police is intended as one of its primary missions to be a paramilitary force to prevent the Afghan Army from being able to mount a coup.

        1. the horror, the horror /Kurtz

        2. GBs are for training counterinsurgency paramilitaries or regular forces, not cops – a lot of the embedded police trainers are National Guard doing “special forces style work” (see ILARNG 33rd BDE – Task Force Phoenix).

          Cripes, I did “Special Forces” work with the Iraqi Army’s 14th INF DIV – but I have no green beret, am not crazy, am not as psychotically brave/risk taking and weapons proficient as they are.

          1. Drake

            Yes and no. Let’s face it, for the brief period that the current Afghan government is in power without foreign backing, cops there will be fighting a counterinsurgency campaign.

            I bet they will quickly lose. I hope the Karzi clan doesn’t have time to flee to Switzerland or wherever they have banked their $billions.

            1. The GBs should be sticking with the ANA, not the ANP.

  17. The Democrats’ magic-coin fantasy
    http://www.washingtonpost.com/…..story.html

    If there were any doubt that leverage had shifted to Republicans in the debt-limit standoff, it was dispelled when Obama supporters urged the president to create $1 trillion out of thin air by minting a magic coin. Seriously.

    On Saturday, the Treasury Department finally put a halt to the magic-coin insanity, declaring, “Neither the Treasury Department nor the Federal Reserve believes that the law can or should be used to facilitate the production of platinum coins for the purpose of avoiding an increase in the debt limit.”

    1. h3k86qc35923

      Nothing I’ve read suggests that the platinum option isn’t real. And it’s not as if they have to mint a single $1T coin. They could simply mint a $3B coin every day after they hit the debt limit.

      Clearly this administration isn’t opposed to quantitative easing (which is what the coin is). Why are they afraid of a little QE now, in the face of a “catastrophe”?

      I think Obama has started to choose his strategies by throwing darts in the Oval Office.

    2. Tulpa (LAOL-PA)

      The trillion dollar coin thing is perfectly valid. Nobody thinks it solves any problem other than evading the debt ceiling limit.

      It sounds ridiculous, but TBH the ratio of value of the denomination to the numismatic content isn’t that far off from that of a hundred dollar bill, and we don’t deride that.

      1. robc

        I would deride them if they printed 10 billion $100 bills in one running.

        It isnt the numismatic value as much as the blowing up of M0 that Im deriding. Ive been doing it since they started it back at QE1.

  18. Boston, MA police officer with violent past charged with rape. Is given a paid vacation.

    1. Auric Demonocles

      I wonder how long it would take for the police to arrive if I ran into that guy on the street.

    2. Can’t they just rape each other?

  19. Bee Tagger

    Ben Bernanke wants the debt ceiling raised; the Federal Reserve chair says it doesn’t create new deficits or spending.

    Yet we continue to prosecute bars for serving inebriated patrons.

  20. History lesson: Why did Congress create a national debt limit?
    http://www.washingtonpost.com/….._blog.html

    It started with a war.
    …
    But World War I was a conflict with unknowable costs, making targeted legislation difficult. At first Congress established a $5 billion limit on new issues of bonds, along with the immediate issuance of $2 billion in one-year certificates of indebtedness, in the First Liberty Loan Act of 1917.

    But very quickly another law was needed ? the Second Liberty Bond Act of 1917 ? in which Congress set a general limit on borrowing: $9.5 billion in Treasury bonds and $4 billion in one-year certificates. This freed the Treasury secretary to begin to figure out the best mix of securities to issue, without nearly as much congressional oversight as before.

    1. Who cares what a bunch of old white men did like a hundred years ago.

  21. John

    Obama on the debt. This is fucking amazing.

    While I’m willing to compromise and find common ground over how to reduce our deficit, America cannot afford another debate with this Congress over how to pay the bills they’ve already racked up, To even entertain the idea of this happening, of America not paying its bills, is irresponsible. It’s absurd.

    It is as if he wasn’t President for the last four years.

    And then, there’s this:

    The issue here is whether America pays its bills,” Obama said. “We are not a deadbeat nation.

    No asshole. You are the won who ran up the debt.

    http://www.qando.net/?p=14644

    1. Quit lying, Red Tony. The Bushpigs took a surplus and left a $1.2 trillion deficit that still exists.

      http://www.politifact.com/trut…..istration/

      1. John

        Obama has been in office for four years. He did nothing but spend more money. Stop fucking lying and go choke on your own vomit and die, you nasty little fucking sockpuppet.

        1. Restoras

          Please don’t feed it, John. It only craves your responses.

        2. John,

          Once again you are arguing with the crazy guy who reeks of urine and is screaming at the wall.

          Seriously, why do you waste your time on the batshit crazy?

          1. John

            You are right. I am properly chastened for that one.

      2. We have an attempted troll begging to be fed in Comment Aisle 5 – patrons, please avoid. Thanks.

      3. An0nB0t

        C-.

        “Red Tony” is going a bit over the top, like calling someone a crypto-fascist or an inbred, child-raping, hatemongering homophobe.

        You’ll have to be more subtle if you want to keep this ruse going.

      4. Jeff

        LOL, Politi”Fact”. Whatever you say, Other Blue Tony.

    2. Rich

      Hope and Change; Full Faith and Credit.

    3. Great Britain will imperialize itself out of existence,
      Germany will militarize itself out of existence and
      the United States will spend itself out of existence.
      -Vladimir Lenin 1917

      Change “existence” to “being a global power” and he wasn’t too far off.

      1. Yes, well, what did he say about the U.S.S.R.? ‘Cause it’s no longer in existence.

        1. Yes, well, what did he say about the U.S.S.R.? ‘Cause it’s no longer in existence.

          One of life’s delicious ironies. To be enjoyed.

          1. I’m thinking about buying the embalmed Lenin for my foyer. How much do you think it would cost?

            1. 10 rouble and one bottle wodka!

              1. Great, I can swing that. I haven’t figured out what to do with Lenin’s stuffed corpse, though I figure there’s got to be a commercial angle.

                1. I’ll put King Tut’s mummified corpse if you get Lenin’s and we can do a collaboration.

                  How a “Weekend At Bernies” remake with Lenin playing Silverman’s role and Tut playing Andrew McCarthy’s character? Couldn’t be any stiffer than the original.

                  1. Who owns Tutankhamun, anyway?

                    I have an idea for Lenin. I’ll take him to USF games, where he can become an unofficial mascot. I’ll paint him green and gold and nail some sort of bull helmet to his head.

                  2. Oh, or maybe hire a ventriloquist and make Lenin into a dummy for his act.

                    1. That’s a good idea. I was thinking “hat rack,” especially if he’s frozen in that “reaching hand” position.

                    2. A wisecracking, sexually astute, yet Marxist Lenin dummy.

                    3. Ventriloquist: “What do you know about women, anyway? You’re a dead dummy.”
                      Lenin: “Da, but I’ve got more wood than you!”
                      [Laughter]

                    4. *polite applause*

                    5. Dude, it’s Lenin saying this. Lenin. The actual corpse of Lenin.

                    6. *louder applause*

                    7. I think a running gag will be Lenin confusing the quotes of Karl and Groucho.

      2. if only the USSR had held out for just a few more decades… *chortle*

      3. Tulpa (LAOL-PA)

        That sounds made up. The US wasn’t a major global player in 1917, and the fedgov was still tiny at that time.

        1. KDN

          The U.S. had, by far, the world’s largest GDP and industrial sector in 1917 and a 33 Battleship (10 Dreadnought) Navy (Compared to 60/20 for Britain). They were on everyone’s mind even if they weren’t in everyone’s business.

          This is Lenin we’re talking about, though. If it’s not made up, “spending” probably refers to the private sector.

    4. Mike M.

      By the way, this hypocritical, lying piece of shit actually voted against raising the debt ceiling as senator in 2006!

      1. Rich

        Under the BUSH administration, thank you very much!

      2. Auric Demonocles

        That’s putting it lightly. He said needed to raise it showed a failure of leadership.

        1. There is video on Youtube of his saying this.

          Why it isn’t plastered all over the teevee 24 hours a day, I don’t know.

          1. Auric Demonocles

            I only did a quick search and didn’t see it. I was hoping to get a clip of him saying it.

            1. Ask, and you shall receive.

    5. Jordan

      To even entertain the idea of this happening, of America not paying its bills, is irresponsible. It’s absurd.

      No. Racking up those bills in the first place is irresponsible. Everybody in government knew that the money was not there in the first place.

      1. They aren’t even bills for the most part!

    6. Drake

      “America cannot afford another debate”

      We are broke, but how much do debates cost?

      1. At these prices, we can’t afford NOT to debate!

        1. I meant that as a joke, I really don’t give a crap if there’s debate or not, since I know what the final decision is already.

        2. Rich

          “Our debates are INSANE!!”

    7. Auric Demonocles

      Actually he’s lying, as usual. Paying for our debts requires what, like $400 billion a year? We don’t need to borrow more money to pay our bills. We can stop borrowing now and avoid defaulting. It just requires we limit spending to “only” $2.5 trillion a year. Even if we brought in only $500 billion a year we could still avoid defaulting.

      1. Zeb

        They seem to be pretending that all planned spending is debt that must be paid, when in fact it is just spending that congress can stop from happening if there is no money to be spent.

      2. Just remember: the stimulus was supposed to be a one-time thing. That’s the reason the Obama Administration is relying on CRs instead of actually pushing for a budget: that puffed-up baseline would get scaled back to pre-stimulus levels.

        1. Auric Demonocles

          I thought they weren’t passing a budget because of evul republicants?

        2. VG Zaytsev

          Maybe they’ll agree to get rid of baseline budgeting then.

          The r’s would score a win if that was the concession that they got for agreeing to raise the debt limit.

        3. Francisco d Anconia

          Why aren’t the Repubs pointing this out?

    8. R C Dean

      America cannot afford another debate with this Congress over how to pay the bills they’ve already racked up,

      You gotta love the way he refers to future spending as “bills we’ve already racked up.”

      Apparently, once spending is approved one time, it cannot ever be cut back in the future.

  22. Bee Tagger

    Meanwhile, the White House informed House Budget Chair Paul Ryan that the president will miss the February 4 legal deadline to submit a budget.

    Does Ben Bernanke probably wants the legal deadline on budgets raised too?

    1. Bee Tagger

      Just checking to see if I made any typos. Nope, all set.

      1. R C Dean

        No typos, but a nice grammar fail.

    2. Tulpa (LAOL-PA)

      Do they mean February 4, 2010?

  23. Louisville, KY police officer files false charges against 12-year old to cover up his own criminal behavior. Is given a paid vacation.

    1. SugarFree

      God bless this brave hero. That young punk might have broken into someone’s car one day.

    2. sarcasmic

      What’s the problem? I thought it was SOP to make up charges after assaulting someone.

      1. mnarayan

        Yea but you can’t then admit those charges were fabricated. Really its just a case of insufficient training; they probably didn’t make it to “stand by your made up accusations” part of the manual.

    3. robc

      His arraignment date has been set for Jan. 31.

      Better than in most cases.

  24. It Begins: Bundesbank To Commence Repatriating Gold From New York Fed
    http://www.zerohedge.com/news/…..w-york-fed

    In what could be a watershed moment for the price, provenance, and future of physical gold, not to mention the “stability” of the entire monetary regime based on rock solid, undisputed “faith and credit” in paper money, German Handelsblatt reports in an exclusive that the long suffering German gold, all official 3,396 tons of it, is about to be moved.

    wait, is this a beginning of a heist movie?

    1. “The German Job”

      “Geld, Gewehr und Gotham”

      “Fritz’s Big Score”

      1. NoVAHockey

        it’s Kelly’s heroes. except in reverse.

        1. Nice.

        2. I would have gone for The Lavender Hill Mob myself.

          1. NoVAHockey

            haven’t seen that one. but i’ll add it to the list.

      2. Rich

        “Goldshyster”

      3. SugarFree will be the mastermind. Warty will be the strongman. Shreek will provide comedy relief. The rest of us will be the expendable red-shirts. In the end, it will be a double-cross with RC Dean doing the switcheroo.

        1. SugarFree

          This is acceptable. I’m little more than a brain in a jar at this point anyway.

        2. Karl Hungus

          And Dunphy, the renegade cop who does things his own way, will be the one to stop us.

          1. Restoras

            No, he’ll be too busy banging Morgan Fairchild and competing in the Mr. Olympia contest.

            1. Karl Hungus

              No, he’ll be too busy banging Morgan Fairchild and competing in the Mr. Olympia contest.

              But in the end, renegade cops always remember their oaths. His epiphany will come as he’s sitting on the edge of the bed in his seedy hotel room, an empty bottle of Jack on the nightstand, his face covered in three-day-old stubble, his Bren Ten in its shoulder rig hanging from the footboard, and the cartel boss’s wife asleep behind him. The chief’s words playing over and over in his head: “Your city needs a hero, Dunphy. Your city needs you“

              1. I lol’d.

              2. +1 Golden Monocle awarded.

      4. NoVAHockey

        actually, wasn’t this plot of one of the Die Hard movies. Germans loot the NY Fed Reserve?

        1. Generic Stranger

          Yipee Ki-yay motherfucker.

          1. Or the hilarious tbs version:

            Yippy Ki-yay, Mr. Falcon.

            where Mr. Falcon is said in a stereotypical asian accent.

            kid you not. that actually happened.

            1. Generic Stranger

              I think I saw it a long time ago.

              Personally, I wish they’d just bleep it, rather than trying to dub over it. The dubs are almost always poorly done and distract from the show more than the bleep does. Hell, the bleep is so culturally ingrained now that it adds almost as much to the dialog as the curse word itself did.

        2. An0nB0t

          I’m going to get pilloried for this, but I watched DH 1, 2, and 3 sequentially at Christmas, and 3 was easily my favorite. Much funnier than the others, lacking in awful characters like Dwayne T. Robinson or Sipowicz, and Zeus is a great addition.

          2 is godawful, but still probably better than 4, which I refuse to watch again.

          1. hamilton

            3 is good. 1 is an american classic.

    2. Jerry on the road

      Starring Bruce Willis?

  25. Sheriff makes policy changes after man shot 16 times in bed
    http://seattletimes.com/html/l…..ng10m.html

    1. SugarFree

      I assume the policy change will be “two in the head and always leave a drop gun.”

    2. I hope you were just quoting the headline. I don’t want ot have to jump on you for using the passive voice.

    3. $park?

      Shot him in the bed? Does that hurt as much as being shot in the driveway?

  26. Washington, DC police officer with checkered past accused of raping a child and is ordered held without bail pending a hearing. Is given a paid vacation while he sits in a jail cell.

  27. The Placebo Phenomenon
    An ingenious researcher finds the real ingredients of “fake” medicine.
    http://harvardmagazine.com/201…..phenomenon

    Although Kaptchuk, an associate professor of medicine, has spent his career studying these mysterious human reactions, he doesn’t argue that you can simply “think yourself better.” “Sham treatment won’t shrink tumors or cure viruses,” he says.

    But researchers have found that placebo treatments?interventions with no active drug ingredients?can stimulate real physiological responses, from changes in heart rate and blood pressure to chemical activity in the brain, in cases involving pain, depression, anxiety, fatigue, and even some symptoms of Parkinson’s.

    1. That’s a really good article, and that doc is like the greatest RL troll since Milgram.

  28. The Late P Brooks

    The Bushpigs took a surplus and left a $1.2 trillion deficit that still exists.

    If Bushpig did not exist, it would have been necessary to invent him.

    1. John

      Sock puppet has got to sock puppet. Lying and defending the indefensible is what they do. I just wish his handlers would send us a less retarded sock puppet. They must really be short on them or the quality available must be really low.

      1. And yet you give it what it wants – join us in the ignoratroll brigade.

    2. Restoras

      It’s a sock, people. Don’t feed it and it will wither on the vine.

      1. Heedless

        Hooray for metaphors!

        1. Virginian

          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KFLq7cyHKMg

  29. for anyone who missed it, my latest book is still available for free.
    http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B00B0NTAAM/reasonmagazinea-20/

    1. crafty code there, reason.

    2. $park?

      Available for free … on a Kindle. You should note that because it does make a difference.

      1. Night Elf Mohawk

        Available for free… on a Kindle. Or on a PC, Mac, iDevice, or Android device running the Kindle app. I wonder how many people reading this don’t have access to at least one of those.

        1. $park?

          I have none of those, are you still going to be a pedant about it?

          1. Brett L

            How the fuck are you commenting here? Are you the last Linux holdout?

            1. $park?

              “Available for free… on a Kindle. Or on a PC, Mac, iDevice, or Android device running the Kindle app.”

              I use a PC, not every PC comes with the Kindle app. I don’t install it because I don’t like reading books electronically.

              1. mnarayan

                The app is free.

                1. $park?

                  The app is free.

                  It’s not about paying for it, it’s about reading books on my computer. If I’m going to read a book, I want to sit somewhere comfortable.

            2. robc

              Android is linux.

      2. yep – I’m doing the Amazon thing first since I sell the majority through them. Later it will be pushed to the other platforms.

        1. $park?

          Anything non-electronic?

          1. what is this, the 20th century?

            1. $park?

              I take it that’s a no. Shame, looks like it might be mildly interesting.

        2. Corneliusm

          Thanks, I’m dling it onto my Nexus tablet now. 😉

    3. gaijin

      you are one prolific mofo!

      1. Or just nuts…

  30. Providence, RI police officer takes victim of domestic abuse home and has sex with her while on duty. Does not answer radio call for shots fired. She accuses him of rape but charges are not filed. He is given an 8 month paid vacation.

    1. Obviously it wasn’t part of procedures that you don’t rape women from domestic abuse homes.

      1. R C Dean

        I defy you to find that in the policy manual. Its just not there. Ergo, no basis for firing him.

  31. BigT

    Rahm looking for good ideas on gun control:

    17 human heads reportedly found at Chicago’s O’Hare International Airport

    Fox4KC.com reports that the heads were still covered with skin and were taken to the Cook County Medical Examiner’s office, according to the Chicago Sun-Times.

    No foul play was suspected, the newspaper reported.

    http://www.foxnews.com/us/2013…..l-airport/

    1. Rich

      the heads were still covered with skin

      OK ….

      1. Restoras

        No mohel’s in Chicago? Who knew?

        1. Try Skokie.

    2. Rahm looking for good ideas on gun control

      How about putting a wall around the city to prevent anybody from getting in our out? And make Chicago/Cook Co. a different state from the rest of IL.

    3. $park?

      17 human heads reportedly found at Chicago’s O’Hare International Airport

      AND

      No foul play was suspected, the newspaper reported.

      Don’t really seem to go together in my mind for some weird reason.

      1. Bardas Phocas

        Body Parts business.

        “You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don’t wanna know about it, believe me.”

    4. mr simple

      Did they ask David Spade about it?

  32. John

    http://www.humanevents.com/201…..y-15-2013/

    New York goes full retard on gun control. It is like Andrew Cumo wants to erase all doubts that yes he really is dumber than his father.

    1. Restoras

      On the flipside, gun crime, whatever that is, is about to begin inching up – even if it is committed by otherwise law abiding citizens.

      1. John

        Yup. Everyone in New York who owns one of those banned weapons is now a criminal.

      2. R C Dean

        I think if you have one now you are allowed to keep it as long as you register it.

        For confiscation later.

        1. John

          And if it is ever stolen and used for a crime, you will be charged with a crime.

    2. Rich

      “At what point do you say, ‘No more innocent loss of life?'” asked the governor

      The dumber — it burns.

      1. An0nB0t

        Impeach him for his awful grammar first!

      2. Zeb

        Say it whenever you feel like it. It’s still not going to happen.

  33. SugarFree

    Automated Licence Plate Readers Business Is Booming

    Police forces across the United States are quietly investing in vehicle tracking technology that can store vast quantities of data about people’s movements, according to the ACLU. The civil liberties group is drawing attention to an interesting 2012 report from the Police Executive Research Forum, which states that 85 percent of police agencies plan to acquire or increase their use of license plate recognition cameras within the next five years.

    1. NoVAHockey

      a neighbor wanted to install these at the entrance to the neighborhood. and yes, he’s a county cop.

      i was able to lead the push back at the association meeting.

      1. I hope there was much gnashing of teeth and clutching of pearls when you hated the children.

        I have no HOA and it’s a beautiful paradise.

    2. Sug, what’s your point? Can you show any coercion here? Any rights violations? I didn’t think so, because PUBLIC, and also PENUMBRA. So show us on the doll where the police camera touched you, because this is obviously a visceral reaction to something abstract and not a real libertarian issue.

      1. Tonio

        nicole, you are absolutely right about the details, but missing the big picture. Opposing expansion of government for any reason is pretty much a libertarian bona fide, AFAIK.

        Also, the potential for governments (plural) to share this data and cause mischief is much greater than the potential of private actors.

        1. mr simple

          Woosh!

        2. Sorry, Tonio, didn’t mean to take you in.

    3. “Licence”? Has IFH hacked your account, or are you some kind of monster?

      1. SugarFree

        My spellcheque phailed me.

      2. Why not both?

  34. Cottage Grove, OR police officers beat up man and cause permanent knee injury while arresting him for a crime he had nothing to do with and they had no PC to arrest for. The charges against the man were dropped and he has filed a civil suit against the officers involved, who are also accused of using racial slurs during their physical attack.

    Nothing else happened.

    1. Night Elf Mohawk

      Disorderly conduct has to be one of the most transparent shams in a cop’s repertoire.

    2. Cdr Lytton

      Bonus points for yelling “quit resisting”.

      Unsurprising that this would happen in Cottage Grove.

  35. The Late P Brooks

    I’ll just leave this scenario here.

    Let’s say they manage to get their magazine limits, including pistol magazines; like California and Mass. Anything bigger than 10 rounds becomes verboten. How long ’til a cop (exempt, of course) gets caught selling a police issue high capacity magazine?

    1. How much money did David Gregory get for selling his?

    2. R C Dean

      Anything bigger than 10 rounds becomes verboten.

      The new limit in NY is 7 rounds.

      Unless, of course, you’re a cop. Then you can keep your high-cap mags.

      1. Unless, of course, you’re a cop. Then you can keep your high-cap mags.

        Are they going to grandfather in the high-cap mags already out there? I honestly haven’t been paying too much attention to the details.

        1. Ken Shultz

          I don’t know.

          I’d say they wouldn’t be so stupid as to make instant criminals out of so many otherwise law abiding people, but they are.

          They’re that stupid.

          1. Tonio

            I’d say they wouldn’t be so stupid as to make instant criminals out of so many otherwise law abiding people, but they are.

            Ha, ha. Stupid? No. Deliberately ratcheting up totalitarianism by inventing more and more felonies? Yes.

        2. R C Dean

          Don’t know. I do know that a lot of the low-cap mags for guns that can take higher-caps take 10 rounds, because that was the old high-cap limit. I wouldn’t be surprised if this means that there are no legal mags for some guns.

        3. Restoras

          No. You have to dispose of them/sell them to someone in a different state, I presume through a FFL dealer so there is proof. Anyone caught with more than 8 rounds in a MAGAZINE is committing a crime.

          1. No. You have to dispose of them/sell them to someone in a different state, I presume through a FFL dealer so there is proof. Anyone caught with more than 8 rounds in a MAGAZINE is committing a crime.

            So it is 7 rounds in NY, and 10 rounds US. Is that what they are going for? And if so, are they really expecting people to destroy the high-cap mags? Just thinking, but wouldn’t that run afoul of the takings clause?

            1. Restoras

              Sure but since when do these fascist assholes care about the Consitution?

              1. Sure but since when do these fascist assholes care about the Consitution?

                They don’t, I am just thinking about ways to fuck up the system so I can keep my high-cap mags.

                1. IF I had any, or course.

                  1. IamNotEvil

                    Since most handgun magazines have required outside dimensions (to fit the grip), if it’s anything like the last ban the only major difference was a larger follower and shorter spring. Both of which are very easy to modify/replace if you know what you’re doing.

      2. Corneliusm

        The law is even stupider than that. You can keep your 10-round mags, but loading 7 rounds is verboten. The law-abiding will have to count carefully when reloading mags. It certainly will prevent any would-be from using the full 10-round capacities though!

        Wishful thinking is dangerous.

  36. John

    http://www.buzzfeed.com/buzzfe…..l-internet

    Prosecutor who hounded Aaron Swartz husband comes out in her defense. Nothing says feminism like having your husband run out to protect your poor little self.

    It is very heartening to see federal hack prosecutors finally take some heat. People need to make that bitch’s life miserable.

    1. John,

      I was reading up recently on the Wells case (the pizza delivery guy with the bomb bolted to his neck).

      I was curious what your thoughts would be, since I find the accusation that the real master-mind was given immunity while the small fry were nailed troubling.

      1. John

        It is a really hard case. My guess is that the cops just want it off the books so they were happy to take the small fish.

        1. What I find disturbing is the accusation that the delivery man was part of the gang but changed his mind. The claim is that he was in debt to crack dealers (he allegedly paid his favorite prostitute with crack) and wanted to rob the bank to pay off his debt.

          I admit I have 0 experience with crack dealers, but I have a hard time seeing a small time dealer doing anything but demanding cash on the barrel. Couple that with the involvement of Mary Beth Buchanan, a U.S. Attorney who has a well documented history of permitting perjury in her prosecutions and a willingness to falsely accuse people of crimes occasionally merely to further her political career, and my libertarian sense starts tingling.

          1. John

            Never under estimate people’s stupidity, but I find it difficult to believe that any drug dealer or bookie would want to bother with such a crackpot scheme. The easier answer is “pay me or die”.

  37. Duluth, MN police officer brutally beats drunk man in a wheelchair and is charged with two misdemeanors after video of the incident is released and there is a public outcry. Wants his trial moved to another part of the state because of bad press. He is currently on an unpaid vacation.

    1. John

      Officer safety. If he had let the guy off without a beating, other more dangerous people might have gotten ideas.

    2. Things are looking up, considering the guy was actually charged and put on unpaid vacation.

  38. John

    http://thestir.cafemom.com/in_…..t_child_in

    Sloopy missed one. DC Cop shoots and kills the mother of his daughter then leaves his infant daughter to die in a hot car. Must be that new professionalism.

    1. Hrm, typically I advocate for the victims of cops to kill the cops’ family.

      Not sure how I feel about this one.

  39. SugarFree

    Hysteria Strikes: Django Unchained Action Figure Outrage

    I’m sorry Tarantino super fans and the five Klan members with enough money to buy these bizarre dolls, they’re just not worth the anguish they’re causing.

    1. John

      But little hipster kids only sell their slave dolls to each other ironically. So it is okay.

    2. It’s so much more fun when they disagree with each other in the comments.

    3. Brett L

      When did this right not to be exposed to things that make one uncomfortable come into being? And how can I use it to shut down jezebel?

      1. Why would you want to shut them down? I prefer to keep them all localized in some place that I will never visit.

        Otherwise they might spread. Like herpes.

    4. Karl Hungus

      I finally saw Django this weekend, and I must say, I enjoyed it thoroughly.

  40. The Beckerhead’s Galt’s Gulch describes uber-fundie pastor David Barton’s role in “deprogramming” students.

    http://www.rightwingwatch.org/…..alts-gulch

    1. Restoras

      Remember people, it’s just a stiff, rubout soaked sock craving responses….

      1. You know who else craved responses…

        1. Restoras

          Everyone with a twitter or facebook account?

        2. B. F. Skinner?

        3. Ivan Pavlov?

        4. R C Dean

          Roman Polanski?

      2. I think SIV had it right that it’s actually “Mo”.

        1. Er? Where did that come from?

          1. Shriek has made a few positive comments about Mo in the past. Also, Mo is something of a left-libertarian.

  41. Deptford, NJ police officer charged with shooting a friend in the head while at home. He is released on $10,000 bail and is given a paid vacation.

    1. John

      He will plead to involuntary manslaughter and do less than five years in the hole.

  42. The executive actions could include giving the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention authority to conduct national research on guns . . .

    The data that I have, and that was used in the Heller decision, shows that guns are used defensively anywhere from 256,500 to 1,210,000 per year, or 702 to 3315 times per day (depending on which study you put your stock in).

    There were 8775 murders via firearm in 2010 (the latest year with data from the FBI) which means that for every murder, there were 24 murders via gun per day, or 675 FEWER murders per day than defensive uses.

    I’m pretty sure that’s not the kind of results Obama is looking for, however, when he directs the CDC to do his math for him.

    1. BigT

      mlg – would you re-post the link? The one in your post is not working. I’d love to see the data.

      1. http://davekopel.org/Briefs/07…..iners;.pdf

        Page 14.

        It’s not the hard data itself. It’s a summary of it. But full references are given.

        1. for some reason, reason is adding in the ; right before the .pdf. Remove the ; and it should work great.

    2. Suthenboy

      And it isnt the kind of results he is going to get.

  43. Report: Obama officials issued $216 billion in regulations last year
    http://thehill.com/blogs/regwa…..z2I05zvCoi

    The Obama administration issued $236 billion worth of new regulations last year, according to a report from a conservative think tank.

    The analysis from the American Action Forum, led by former Congressional Budget Office Director Douglas Holtz-Eakin, found that the administration added $216 billion in rules and more than $20 billion in regulatory proposals in 2012. Complying with those rules will require an additional 87 million hours of paperwork, the report said.

    The group put the total price tag from regulations during Obama’s first term at more than $518 billion.

  44. The Late P Brooks

    I would love to see the entrances to Yellowstone and all the other “marquee” National Parks (and the Smithsonian) blocked off with concrete Jersey Barriers, with signs reading, “Closed, Due to Use of Park Operating Funds to Pay Debt Service on Unsustainable Government Giveaways.”

    Not exactly catchy, I know, but better than nothing.

    1. John

      Sandra Fluke’s vagina Yellowstone.

      1. Ew Seriously So Gross

        /teenage girls

        1. John

          That was supposed to say “greater than” but the squirrels ate my greater than sign.

          1. That was supposed to say “greater than” but sthe squirrels Sandra Fluke’s vagina ate my greater than sign.

            FIFY!

            1. Fuck. The squirrels ate my the squirrels.

              1. It’s like the end of Tin Cup…

                1. Restoras

                  You watched that to the end?

                  1. The remote was all the way across the room.

                  2. AlmightyJB

                    Yeah, most overrated golf movie ever. Watch me sabotage any possibility of success in my chosen career so I’m never under any pressure to repeat it. Than let’s have everyone think I’m cool for doing it.

          2. NeonCat

            As long as they don’t eat her vagina. Poor squirrels.

    2. Rich

      This.

      It has the added benefit of psychologically preparing the population to enter government buildings only when invited.

      1. Drake

        They tried it with NJ State Parks a few years ago. As an NJ resident, it’s my park – so I walked around the barrier and enjoyed myself.

  45. Lethbridge, Alberta, Canada police officer charged with assaulting man whle arresting him for being drunk in public. And yes, even in the Great White North this is cause for a paid vacation.

  46. Brett L

    “Stand closer to the rhino.” Never good advice

    Tuesday that Chantal Beyer said the game park owner snapped pictures and suggested that she “stand just a little bit closer” seconds before the attack.

    1. The sign said, “Beware the camel spits,” and I was.

  47. CampingInYourPark

    “Fiat, Chrysler and Guangzhou Automobile Group Co. are getting closer to reaching an agreement to produce Jeeps in China for the Chinese market, an Italian newspaper reported Sunday.”

    http://www.freep.com/article/2…..hina-nears

    October 30, 2012, 12:45 pm
    “Chrysler’s chief executive on Tuesday strongly refuted claims that production of Jeeps would shift to China”

    http://thecaucus.blogs.nytimes…..-to-china/

  48. The Late P Brooks

    He will plead to involuntary manslaughter and do less than five years in the hole.

    He will plead to involuntary manslaughter illegal discharge of a firearm inside city limits and do less than five years days in the hole.

    1. John

      No. He murdered the guy while off duty. Since he is a cop that means he will never be convicted of murder. So they will get him for the lowest possible crime that acknowledges someone died.

      1. Firing into occupied clothing.

        1. Kaptious Kristen

          You forgot your passive voice: occupied clothing was fired upon

          1. That is what happened, but the statute they will resort to is what was named.

            (passive enough for ye?)

  49. CampingInYourPark

    “More than one in four American workers with 401(k) and other retirement savings accounts use them to pay current expenses, new data show. The withdrawals, cash-outs and loans drain nearly a quarter of the $293 billion that workers and employers deposit into the accounts each year, undermining already shaky retirement security for millions of Americans.”

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/…..ml?hpid=z1

  50. Washington, DC police officer convicted of one count of one count of assault with a dangerous weapon when he unloads his service weapon into a car full of tranny hookers he had tried to pick up earlier in the night but was rebuffed outside a CVS, where he also brandished his weapon but was let go by an off-duty cop when he flashed his badge. He is giver probation and time served.

    I guess attempted murder is for the little people.

    1. John

      But it is good to hear that the DC tranny hookers at least have some standards.

    2. An0nB0t

      “unloads his service weapon into a car full of tranny hookers”

      Alas, but no California senators were harmed.

    3. Tim

      This incident cries out for its’ own line of action figures…

  51. The Late P Brooks

    attempted murder is for the little people.

    The man is a HIGHLY TRAINED LAW ENFORCEMENT PROFESSIONAL, dammit. He is a skilled marksman; if he had been trying to “murder” those people, they’d all be dead. How hard is that for you civilians to understand?

    This is why HE should have a gun, and YOU SHOULDN’T.

  52. How the fuck did I miss that the IRS won’t be ready to start processing everyone’s returns until Feb/March (and 1/30 for most people)? Trying to comment further but there is only RAGE.

    1. Brett L

      That’s good, because I don’t intend to send them return until at least April 15.

      1. kinnath

        If you file electronically, you can file anytime you want, and then mail check on April 15.

  53. NebulousFocus

    Union members misbehaving.

    1. Ken Shultz

      It’s hard to believe people in a union would do something like that.

      I’m sure the perpetrators will be expelled from the union; the union will apologize for their members’ actions; the union will cooperate fully in the ensuing criminal investigation; and the culprits will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law.

      Because we live in a America, and that means this sort of behavior never goes unpunished.

  54. Ken Shultz

    Anybody interested in joining a fantasy hockey league?

    It’s a public league–mostly strangers, commissioner is CBS Sports.

    $99 buy in; 1st place $450, 2nd $150, 3rd is a free play at CBS Sports next year, and if you come in behind that, you suck.

    Draft time is January 16, 2013, 2:30 PM ET

    http://tinyurl.com/a8u9htc

    1. Only if I can call my team “The Cunty McCuntstains”.

      1. Ken Shultz

        If nobody in the league objects, I doubt it’ll be a problem.

  55. The Late P Brooks

    Bloomberg but-shaking chick, in opener to her show, accused the Republicans of “threatening default”.

    Because, presumably, if we don’t raise the debt ceiling to infinity, ALL MONEY WILL VANISH!

    1. Auric Demonocles

      I pointed this out above. Apparently our revenues are going to be so low this year that we can’t pay the $400 billion in debt payments without borrowing more.

  56. PS

    Roger Kimball: This Metamorphosis Will Require a Permit
    Sandy wrecked our house, but bureaucrats are keeping it broken.

    http://online.wsj.com/article/…..89786.html

    It’s not only us, of course. Thousands upon thousands have been displaced, but the bullying pedantry of the zoning establishment never wavers. While our house stands empty, the city authorities even showed a sense of humor by sending us a bill for property taxes. For a house they won’t let us repair.

    We’ve spent a few thousand dollars on a lawyer to appeal to Zoning, many thousands in rent, and hundreds getting a fresh appraisal of our house. The latest from our lawyer: Because of our new appraisal, we may be able to “apply for a zoning permit.” “Apply,” mind you.

    1. ant1sthenes

      There is a zoning board, there is a problem. No zoning board, no problem.

      1. PS

        Just dogs and cats, living together…

    2. Sevo

      So the fed money? All that stuff that’s supposedly going to the victims? Sure it’s not a subsidy for the SEIU government employees?

      1. PS

        It doesn’t matter, it’s all being Keynesian multiplied by 1000 or something, so we’re good.

  57. Dr. Frankenstein

    We’re eating less fat but fat is killing us.

    http://www.fathead-movie.com/i…..illing-us/

    1. Kaptious Kristen

      I’m eating plenty of fat and losing weight. And like I would trust the USDA on anything.

      1. Trespassers W

        Speaking of which, I read Taubes over the last couple of weeks, and instantly converted.

        I’ve barely had any carbs since Friday. Pretty sure I’m in ketosis because I am feeling loopy as hell, I’ve lost about five pounds of water weight already, and I’m only eating because I have to.

        Someone reassure me that I’m going to feel normal again soon.

        1. robc

          I lost 20# last summer doing a moderate version, holding myself under 150g carbs per day (1/2 the USDA recommendation).

          It isnt a fast weight loss, but it is a more livable lifestyle, in that I like carbs, but wanted something I could do forever.

          I kind of fell off it post-Halloween, and have put back a few of the pounds. Need to start it up again, I want to lose an addition 15 (so about 20 again).

          1. robc

            Even though I didnt quite keep it up, I didnt go back to the carby lifestyle I had before, so its made some difference.

            I just need to get serious about it again. 150g is pretty maintainable.

            1. Auric Demonocles

              I lost about 30 pounds doing it a few years ago. It wasn’t that hard once I got in a rhythm (as long as I had the option of getting home to cook fairly easily).

              1. Auric Demonocles

                And yeah, I’ve edged back up since then and am considering doing it again. I don’t need to get back to the 170 I did last time (that was too far), but back down to 185 or so would be perfect.

        2. Dr. Frankenstein

          Personally I go with the “Perfect Health diet” You can have safe carbs (white rice and tubers).

          If nothing else your may need to up your carbs in vegtable/fruit form before you feel normal.

          1. Kaptious Kristen

            Yeah, I eat my carbs in the form of berries and dried apricots. And some high cacao (70% +) chocolate once in a while. I’m learning how to bake with nut flours, because deprivation just doesn’t work for me (or many other people). We had flour-free pizza last night. It wasn’t bad.

            1. Dr. Frankenstein

              I think the bottom line from these various diets is don’t eat processed foods and you’ll be o.k.

              1. Kaptious Kristen

                Or, as I say: “Protein & vegetables”. Simple as that.

            2. You need to try meatza. Instead of a bready type crust with alternate flours, you make the crust out of ground meat and eggs…like a thin meatloaf. You bake it a little to set it up, and then bury it alive in pizza toppings and bake it the rest of the way like a regular pizza. OMG!

          2. Trespassers W

            Thanks, I find both of your comments interesting.

            My plan here was to really try this hardcore for a month (one loophole I’ve allowed myself is red wine in moderation) and then ease the carbs back in.

            I thought I’d be craving pastries, but I really would love to just eat a pear right now.

            1. Trespassers W

              Also a nice thick malty beer. But I fear that sort of thing was my downfall in the first place.

              1. Kaptious Kristen

                Yep – even though I’m not much of a beer drinker, I’ve had to adjust my thinking and resign myself to a life of gin & tonics. My favorite was always bourbon & Coke, but that’s out the window now until my bar starts serving stevia-based diet beverages.

              2. robc

                A beer is about the same carbs as a slice of bread. I ran into plenty of occassions where I had enough carbs left to either have my bratwurst on buns or eat them without and have a beer with dinner instead.

                Guess which way I chose.

                1. Trespassers W

                  I don’t have to guess, it’s a cert.

                  I couldn’t care less about bread, personally.

                  1. Auric Demonocles

                    I’m always super confused when someone raves about a sandwich and just talks about how the bread is so great.

                    Or a pizza and the crust.

        3. Kaptious Kristen

          My big problem is exercise. I hate repetitive, regimented gym-type exercise and love fun stuff like skiing and hiking. I have no idea how to get on track with an exercise program. I found the discipline to quit smoking, but I can’t seem to direct that same concept to exercise. I have a fricken elliptical in front of my TV and I still look at the thing with contempt.

          1. AlmightyJB

            If you enjoy Hiking, there you go. A little tougher for me in the winter because when there’s not a bunch of snow there’s a bunch of mud, but that’s great exercise. Pick up a pocket camera and look for interesting shots while your hiking to keep it interesting. Also, resistence training with just dumbells or bands are nice because there’s at least a hundred different excercises you can do which keeps it interesting and you don’t need to spend a lot of time doing them because that type of training burns a lot of calories quickly.

            1. Kaptious Kristen

              Hiking where I live involves driving about 2 hours to the mountains. Not conducive to a daily routine. And walking around the neighborhood ? hiking.

              I have looked into joining a rec center with a pool. I think that may be my best option for “fun” exercise – swimming laps and taking water zoomba or whatever the hell they do these days.

              1. I’m fortunate that I live right next to 1000 acres of state forest, with the bike club having put in a bunch of mountain biking trails.

                I get the feeling the bikers think I’m a whack-job for hiking the trails, though.

          2. Fuck the gym type exercise. This is what you need to do to be fit: walk,play, lift heavy objects, and sprint all out once a week to clear out stress hormones. That’s it, maybe a few planks or squats to tone up, but certainly not anything more than that.

            1. Oh and the heavy objects in order of decreasing frequency of lifting is: my grandchildren, laundry baskets, groceries and trash.

        4. you will feel loopy as the energy conversion of your body switches from carb to fat. At the time I started, I gave up working out and pretty much sat around and ate low-carb snacks.

          One suggestion is to drink high-sodium broth – a cup a day – to help with the symptoms.

          I usually consume less than 30g of carbs a day except for special occasions like drinking beer with friends or a slice of cake. Anyway, I’ve lost 28 pounds, dropped two inches in the pants department and can now wear Large instead of XL tops. I haven’t been this thin since I got out of college. Since running on “fat power” I’ve noticed less energy collapses or jaggedness throughout the day. Instead I feel pretty much the same energy levels – good/moderate – all day.

          1. Restoras

            I’ve lost 28 pounds, dropped two inches in the pants department and can now wear Large instead of XL tops

            So, technically you are no long Lord Humungus, but Lord Still-Really-Big-and-Scary?

          2. Trespassers W

            Yeah, I’ve been drinking bouillon.

            My energy levels are already noticeably evened out, so that’s at least one incentive to keep going.

  58. Auric Demonocles

    Gah! I got on the TicketExchange less than a minute from receiving the AFCCG wait list email, and I’m still waiting for my spot in line 7 minutes later. I’m even less productive than when those ginger pics came up.

    1. Auric Demonocles

      So they were all sold out. I’m not sure how few they must have released for them to be gone in less than a minute from a surprise email.

      1. Brett L

        The surprise email was just a cover for them to sell them to corporate customers at a huge markup.

        1. Auric Demonocles

          There was literally no warning for when they were going to go on sale, but less than 50 seconds from the email arriving was too late? What did they do, put up 4 tickets total?

          1. Brett L

            It were a conspiracy, guv. The tix are a lie.

  59. The Late P Brooks

    the bullying pedantry of the zoning establishment never wavers.

    For some reason, the phrase, “Them yesterday, YOU TODAY” leapt into my heard when I read this.

    I can’t help wondering how much this guy worried about the bullying and pedantry when they were directed at people whom he disapproved of.

    1. John

      A lot. Roger Kimball is a very consistent small government guy. So he is not being hypocritical here.

  60. The Late P Brooks

    I finally got around to RTFA about the New York magazine control law.

    I wonder if they intentionally went for seven rounds because NOBODY MAKES THEM?

    1. John

      That is a good point. Now that I think about it, I have never seen a magazine under ten rounds. Do they make a five round magazine?

      1. Sernylan

        “I have never seen a magazine under ten rounds. Do they make a five round magazine?”

        Most of the small, low caliber (.22/.25/.32/.380) semi-autos range from 5-7 rnds mag capacity, these are the “saturday night special” pocket pistols that banning was all the rage back in the 70’s.

        1. John

          I was thinking about rifle magazines. Yeah, pistol mags can often be under ten rounds.

          1. Sernylan

            5 round hunting mags are available for many rifles as well, a little modification of the follower/spring could yield 7 rnds, and make the mag unreliable,…or…piss on it, just use a hi-cap mag anyway if you are a criminal, because….fuck it.

          2. SweatingGin

            I’ve got a 5 rounder for my AR15. Feeds better than any of the others I have. Think they are for the California or Canada markets.

          3. Tulpa (LAOL-PA)

            Look harder

      2. T

        For ARs? Yes. I think hunting laws in some states require 5 or less? I’ve never actually seen one in the flesh, though.

        1. Sernylan

          “For ARs? Yes. I think hunting laws in some states require 5 or less? I’ve never actually seen one in the flesh, though.”

          DPMS model MA-5R 5 rnd for ar’s

    2. Brett L

      You know, its almost like there’s a cabal of gun manufacturers running the gun control movement. Triple the price of already expensive rifles due to demand? Check. Get customers who usually wouldn’t bother buying another one of your products buying? Check. Have to create and manufacture a whole new line of accessory parts for a captive audience? Check.

    3. R C Dean

      Seven rounds is the standard mag for an olde schoole 1911 .45, is where that number comes from.

      You have to go really small in a 9mm gun to get to 7 round mags. My new carry gun (Sig P938) has six round mags, and its so small that the handle only takes two fingers, leaving your pinky with nothing to do.

      1. Tulpa (LAOL-PA)

        Ruger LC9 has 7 rounds of 9mm.

    4. AZ

      Is Kimber still in NY? I feel they might like a 7-round limit.

      1. Restoras

        Yes – for now.

  61. Sevo

    CA supremes decide trial lawyers need additional billing:
    “Oral promises can be used in fraud case”
    Yes, you can now pay your lawyer to argue “that the lender orally promised them an extension that didn’t appear in the written contract,…”
    Read more: http://www.sfgate.com/news/art…..z2I3iZni1O

    1. Brett L

      You can always pay a lawyer to argue that. You’ll almost always be laughed out of court. Also, doesn’t the lender just have to say “no, I didn’t”?

      1. Sevo

        Dunno, but it went to the supremes. I’m guessing it’s going to be harder to make “no, I didn’t” stick.

        1. Brett L

          Why? If there are no other witnesses, why would one testimony weigh any more than the other. The lender is going to say, “when I modify contracts, I do so in writing. Always.” Not sure what recourse the borrower’s attorney is going to have.

      2. John

        The jury filled with ingoramuses who think banks print their own money won’t laugh that out of court. This decision allows plaintiffs to get past summary judgement and before a jury, which is where the money is.

    2. John

      That whole parole evidence rule is just so 15th Century.

    3. Brett L

      Okay. Having RTA, these people were idiots to sign a piece of paper that was different from what they claim was orally discussed. While I guess I agree they should be allowed to present evidence, I wouldn’t value it very highly were I sitting on a jury. As far as I’m concerned this falls squarely in the “a fool and his money are soon parted” category of things. They knowingly signed a note they couldn’t tote on the oral promise that someone wouldn’t enforce it.

      1. John

        the common law has something called the parole evidence rule. That says that when you have a written contract we construe it based on what is written there, the four corners of the document. The only time we look to extraneous or “parole” evidence is when the meaning of what is there is not clear or it helps define what is there.

        So for example, let’s we have a written document that says “I agree to sell you my pistol for $500” but I own three different pistols. Which one did we agree to sell? In that case, evidence that we talked and I agreed to sell you my Colt Python and not my antique Lugar would be admissible as parole evidence because it defines a vague term in the document.

        But parole evidence that I actually agreed to sell you my custom made cowboy boots would not be admissible. That is not defining a term, it is contradicting the document. It is saying itself is a fraud. And you generally can’t do that. You can argue you signed it under duress but you couldn’t, at least under the common law, claim that you really thought the document said something different. You were expected to read and understand what you signed. This decision pretty much ends that and makes the written document just another piece of evidence. That is bad.

  62. robc

    Meanwhile, the White House informed House Budget Chair Paul Ryan that the president will miss the February 4 legal deadline to submit a budget.

    Meanwhile, the House Budget Chair Paul Ryan informed the White House that of February 5th he will start impeachment proceedings.

    Right? Right?

    1. Sevo

      “Meanwhile, the House Budget Chair Paul Ryan informed the White House that of February 5th he will start impeachment proceedings.”

      Which year?

  63. The Late P Brooks

    Do they make a five round magazine?

    Probably for the sort of Pocket Pimp Gun some commenters like to carry.

    The standard GI 1911 is seven rounds, but even my single stack West German Sig P6 (date stamped 1979), which was replaced by the double stack P226 for military use, is eight rounds.

    As I recall, California and Mass (Illinois? NY?) have a ten round limit, so there are commercially available 10 rd mags for popular double stack pistols. It appears to me New York wants people to replacde all their mags with something which doesn’t even exist.

    1. R C Dean

      Pocket Pimp

      Good band name and/or commenter handle.

      1. John

        There is your fantasy hockey team name.

    2. AlmightyJB

      Will be interesting to see if the NY 7 round max holds up in court.

    3. Restoras

      Replacing with something that doesn’t exist is part of the plan.

      I wouldn’t be surprised if the fascists in Albany think/hope/beleive that if they require 7 round magazines, then it will encourage manufacturers of automatic pistols to not sell in the state, unless of course they already have models wiht 7 round magazines.

      I presume that the manufacturers could simply have NY specific magazines with a blocker of some kind to prevent loading a magazine with more than 7 rounds, but that remains to be seen.

      Of course, isn’t a magazine something that can be made by someone with some skill in sheet metal fabrication?

  64. The Late P Brooks

    You know, its almost like there’s a cabal of gun manufacturers running the gun control movement.

    Why, you’d hafta be plumb craaaazy to think that.

  65. Enough About Palin

    The washington Post is laying the ground work for government seizure of 401(k) accounts:

    A large and growing share of American workers are tapping their retirement savings accounts for non-retirement needs, raising broad questions about the effectiveness of one of the most important savings vehicles for old age.

    More than one in four American workers with 401(k) and other retirement savings accounts use them to pay current expenses, new data show. The withdrawals, cash-outs and loans drain nearly a quarter of the $293 billion that workers and employers deposit into the accounts each year, undermining already shaky retirement security for millions of Americans.

    “What you have is 401(k) participants voting with their wallets saying they would much rather use this money for other purposes. I don’t think this can be ignored. Employers are dramatically overpaying for retirement, but it is not benefitting the employee,” said Matt Fellowes, a former Brookings Institution researcher who is chief executive of Hello?Wallet. “In many cases, the only one benefiting is the vendor.”

    http://www.washingtonpost.com/…..ml?hpid=z1

    1. John

      What you have is 401(k) participants voting with their wallets saying they would much rather use this money for other purposes. I don’t think this can be ignored. Employers are dramatically overpaying for retirement, but it is not benefitting the employee,

      How is your employer giving you money not benefiting you? And yeah don’t think for a moment that these assclowns are not going to steal everyone’s 401K and savings.

    2. AZ

      Ah, collectivizing language. They fail to point out that the “millions of americans” are specifically the ones that choose to take the penalty and cash out.

      1. John

        Americans spending their own money as they see fit. The horror.

      2. Restoras

        To these assholes people living as they see fit are a bug, not a feature.

        It’ll get interesting if they do try and amek a grab. Personally, I’ll cash out and take the tax penalty, and I bet a lot of other people will follow suit.

  66. Trespassers W

    HEY NICOLE (or anyone else in IL)

    Have you made any special firearms-related purchases recently? I’ll be going to the gun shop next week for some much-overdue practice, and I feel like I should buy something that’s in jeopardy while I’m there. But I’m pretty sure you can’t have an AR in Chicago, so I’m not sure what to get.

    1. R C Dean

      You can never have too many combat shotguns laying around the house, I always say.

      1. Trespassers W

        My wife would disagree, but maybe I can say it’s a present for her, and put it under her side of the bed.

        1. Restoras

          As long as she’s not a ginger you should be ok.

    2. Hey Trespassers,

      I haven’t, though my man is in the market. I don’t know enough about all the AR varieties to say if they are all banned here, but you can see here (PDF – pg 5 for def of “assault weapon”). I’ve mostly assumed that just about anything “in jeopardy” more broadly is already out of the question here in Chi. Although I guess I could stock up on 12-round magazines, lol, since it looks like the national limit may be even lower than ours.

      1. Trespassers W

        OK, thanks. That PDF should help.

  67. The Late P Brooks

    You can never have too many combat shotguns laying around the house, I always say.

    I cannot, it pains me to say, afford a real Winchester Model 97 trench gun, but I’m thinking really seriously about spinning up a bayonet mount on the lathe for my short-barreled Model 1300.

    I also am kicking myself because I never bought a Thompson. Even a new one, semi-auto only, with the longer than original barrel, would be an excellent addition to the armory.

    1. John

      I like the 1300. I own an 875, which is a great weapon but pretty damned ungangly in a small space.

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