A.M. Links: Afghanistan War Not Ending in 2014, Obama Administration Drafted Drone Rules In Case of Romney Win, Egypt's President Tries to Sell Power Grab to Judges

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  • never give up and good luck will find you?

    Your reminder for the day that the war in Afghanistan is not ending in 2014.

  • The Obama Administration drafted rules for the use of drones in anticipation of a Mitt Romney win, because they did not think he was as wise as the Nobel Peace Prize winning president.
  • The FBI is trolling Twitter for tips on insider trading and securities fraud. Top men.
  • A Conservative member of Parliament in Britain wants patients to pay for their own medication when it comes to lifestyle-related conditions, because personal responsibility is not yet vestigial in the island country.
  • The Egyptian president Muhammed Morsi met with the country's top judges to insist his unilateral power-grab this weekend was just temporary.
  • The Irish Republicans are eyeing a new terror campaign, according to the British press.

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  1. Biden: Did I really… Did I really say those things, last night, in your tent?
    Secretary Rice:: You said you loved me.
    Biden:: I don’t remember that.
    Secretary Rice:: You lied to me.
    Biden: No, I… I just wasn’t myself last night.
    Secretary Rice:: I suppose my power enchanted you and you were helpless against it.
    Biden: Sort of.
    Secretary Rice:: Then what?
    Biden: It… went away.
    Secretary Rice:: Went away? ‘I dwell in darkness without you’ and it went away?
    Biden: Man I am so stoned right now.

  2. The FBI is trolling Twitter for tips on insider trading and securities fraud.

    The internet WAS created as a means to get us to volunteer information to the government.

    1. I bet they’re doing it wrong. Like those old “How to be a Pool Shark” VHS tapes they sold late at night.

      Worse Actor than Quentin Tarantino: I don’t know how to play pool. Should we play for money?

    2. The FBI sees social media as a potential breeding ground for securities fraud

      That’s OK. Social media see the FBI as a potential breeding ground for *lots* of crap.

    3. so my door will be kicked in if i tweetpic a cat saying “Can I haz insider stock tip?”

      1. No but they will get you for catnip futures manipulation.

    4. When I left the money out and the waitress mistook it for a tip. That wasn’t acting on my part.

  3. Surprise, surprise, surprise! California carbon credit auction underperforms; state budget was designed around auctions generating 7 times their actual revenue so far.

    1. Don’t worry, they’re just figure something stupid out to deal with the shortfall.

      1. Stupid is the wrong word for making the other 49 states pay for it.

        Genius is more like it.

    2. This is my surprised face. ๐Ÿ˜

    3. you mean budget projections were wrong? Needs moar Top Men.

      1. If any private sector business budgeted that innacurately, their asses would be in jail so fast.

        1. Maybe not jail, but definitely Bankruptcy Court.

          1. I’ve been in the private sector. They expect results!

            1. You’re not gonna lose the house, everybody has three mortgages nowadays.

    4. Hooboy. But the rest of the program is going to be a total success.

    5. We’ll make it up in volume.

      1. Quick! Wad up some more money and burn it so we can purchase more carbon credits! That should drive the price up!

        1. Don’t forget to buy credits for that fire!

  4. Deer attacks two men, then takes man’s cigarettes
    http://www.ketknbc.com/news/de…..cigarettes

    1. An oldie but a goodie along the same lines.
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v…..ata_player

      1. That article made me think of the Tomacco episode of the Simpsons.

        1. Fox got a nice little tax credit for that episode.

    2. Do the deer smoke the cigarettes after sex?

      1. I imagine they get a little jittery in the second week of deer camp.

        1. I think there’s a song about that…

          1. Grandma got run over…?

            1. The Second Week of Deer Camp

  5. Colorado universities offer students a chance to live in a dorm that doesn’t ban guns. No one shows up.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..there.html

    1. I weep for the future.

      Seriously, my roomate and I violated the rules for the full (and only) year we lived on campus by having an average of 20 firearms* in our room at any given time.

      1. I think you need to explain the asterisk.

        1. Oh, oops. It was just a note that most of them were pieces of crap that probably wouldn’t have fired more than 2 rounds. Like an old Tek-9 that had a few home-made pieces in it.

          Probably in all about $2000 worth of guns, which isn’t that much considering the actual number of them.

          1. Like an old Tek-9 that had a few home-made pieces in it.

            The children have to learn about TekWar sometime.

            1. That’s what the 1 cent bin at the used bookstore is for.

      2. Yeah, we had a whole reloading setup on a board that was clamped to a desk and could be hidden in less than 30 seconds.

    2. Hard to believe gun owners wouldn’t willingly be corraled into a single spot. Anyway, you have to be over 21 to carry on campus and I imagine most of the older students don’t live in dorms.

    3. Colorado universities offer students a chance to live in a dorm that doesn’t ban guns. No one shows up.

      You’d think some enterprising students would apply to live there, since they’d have lots of space and privacy and, ironically, no guns.

  6. Courtney Love is still a vile creature. John would probably fuck her.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs…..snaps.html

    1. Every time I see Courtney Love, all I can think is “Would you fuck me? I’d fuck me.”

      She really does look like a transvestite serial killer.

      1. She’s only killed once that we know of.

    2. I saw her after a show once! I didn’t want to fuck her.

      1. LIES!

        1. maybe I told the story on here before. Hole opened for another band, and the friend I was at the show with wanted to meet the band. It was a really small venue, and we went back. Band members were there, my friend was tongue tied, and the big thing I remember is there was a broken bottle on the floor (getting cleaned up) that made Love a little snippy.

          1. no ‘punk rock’ lingerie? Or other stories of moral failings?

            1. Not really. My friend was high on coke (I wasn’t aware of this) and I was drunk & underage. That’s about it.

            2. How bad did it smell?

              Was the bass player trying to fold pieces of lunchmeat to fit on tiny pieces of bread?

              1. I wasn’t smelly, it was dirty though. There was a gross sofa that Love was um, reclining on, (fully clothed, I might add) that now I wouldn’t touch with an eleven foot pole.

                1. Hrm, the only bands/people I’ve ever met were The Dead Milkmen, Tom Morello (before RATM when he was in a band called Lock Up (they opened for TSOL)) and Limp Bizkit (not after a show, and well before they were famous). I waited around one time cause my girlfriend at the time wanted to meet Tori Amos, but she never showed.

                  Mr. E/The Eels opened for her, and I may have met him, which would have been cool, but I honestly don’t know if it was him or just some guy.

                  I also shared a table in Alexandria with either Wilford Brimley or a guy who looked exactly like Wilford Brimley. But we didn’t say anything ๐Ÿ™

                  1. I also shared a table in Alexandria with either Wilford Brimley or a guy who looked exactly like Wilford Brimley. But we didn’t say anything ๐Ÿ™

                    That was a really good move. There’s no telling what might set off a diabeetus-crazed into a walrus-like killing rampage.

              2. Was the bass player trying to fold pieces of lunchmeat to fit on tiny pieces of bread?

                That was Nigel, he played lead guitar.

                1. I know, but I assumed the bass player for Hole, since I can’t picture them having a lead guitar player.

                  1. I had a guy I was obsessed with (who blew me off, then later became obsessed with me) totally into TSOL, since it spells “lost” backwards. I never got into that band. He was a strange one, spent a whole party staring at a candle flame once. Maybe he was pissed that I had replaced him at that point though.

                    Back to Courtney Love: I think Hole was opening for God Bullies, who I was into at the time. Hole wasn’t super well known at the time, and this was before Love had become entangled with Cobain, so it’s surprising my friend was into them. But they were promoted as an all-female band (dude musician notwithstanding) and my friend was a feminist . . . so I guess not that big of a surprise at the time.

  7. A Conservative member of Parliament in Britain wants patients to pay for their own medication when it comes to lifestyle-related conditions…

    The worst of both worlds.

    1. From the article:

      He added: ‘If you want to have doughnuts for breakfast, lunch and dinner, fine, but there’s a cost.’

      What if your lifestyle consists of extreme sports and you are constantly breaking bones. What if you are a jogaholic and have to have artificial joints. What if you fuck up your body by being a vegan (which you will), are these lifestyles going to be responsible also? No, it’s just things like smoking, drinking and eating junk food that they want to go after.

      If it was purely a utilitarian thing, they would encourage people to smoke in a socialized health system, as these people actually cost the system less in the long run, at least according to a Dutch study I’m too lazy to look up at the moment. No it’s a puritanical thing where the puritans get to decide, rightly or wrongly, what lifestyles are healthy and which are a drag on the system.

      Fuck off, slavers.

      1. He added: ‘If you want to have doughnuts for breakfast, lunch and dinner, fine, but there’s a cost.’

        Notice how other elective-behaviour lifestyle choices are conspicuously absent from this list…

        What if your lifestyle consists of extreme sports and you are constantly breaking bones?

        Tough shit. Fall on your neck or noggin next time and die quickly.

        What if you are a jogaholic and have to have artificial joints.

        Tough shit, those joint replacements are expensive, and those orthopaedic surgeons are better used elsewhere, like performing terminations.

        What if you fuck up your body by being a vegan (which you will), are these lifestyles going to be responsible also?

        A good Vegan will gladly give his or her life to Gaia. Self-composting is a sacrament. Besides, there is that Carbon Footprint and Cow Methane thingy…

        No, it’s just things like smoking, drinking and eating junk food that they want to go after.

        You’re getting warmer…

        1. Having un-state-sanctioned fun?

          1. We have a winnah!

  8. STEVE SMITH DNA sequenced. Or not.

    1. She’s holding back the semen sample, the lynchpin in the sordid affair.

      1. STEVE wiped it on the drapes, and the dry cleaners ruined it.

  9. ‘I looked like my gay brother’: Anne Hathaway says she saw her sibling staring back at her in the mirror after shaving her hair off for Les Miserables
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs…..ables.html

    1. Why does it matter if he’s gay? Couldn’t she just say she looks like her brother now?

      1. Ask her. All I did was cut’n’paste.

      2. she gets liberal street cred for owning up to the gay sibling and a new merit patch in the special snowflake club.

      3. Maybe she has another brother who isn’t gay?

        1. Yes, only her older brother is gay.

          1. so what stopped her from saying “I look like my older brother”, or one of my brothers? Identity politics at work.

            1. Maybe she was hinting that after the haircut she would finally have a shot at sleeping with her extremely narcissistic gay brother–thereby suggest the other siblings had already had their turn.

          2. So “older brother” is no longer an adequate description of a relation… Peak retard? Is that you?

            (aimed at Hathway, not SF)

            1. Although either alternative would have been acceptable.

    2. ‘I looked like my gay brother’

      Pretty much says it all, right there.

      1. you must admit, it would be a pretty impressive haircut that made Anne Hathaway look like this

      2. Also, LOL at this statement:

        ‘The whole family converted to Episcopalianism after my elder brother came out. Why should I support an organization that has a limited view of my beloved brother?’ she said in the interview.

        The narcissism is just thick here. “Oh, we couldn’t be Catholic after finding out brother dearest was gay!” THAT was the straw that broke the camel’s back? You didn’t have a problem with their position on homosexuality because it didn’t affect you personally? As a raging leftist, the Church’s position on abortion and birth control didn’t cause you to reconsider your religious affiliations?

        What a douchebag family.

        1. I suspect after it became clear that her then boyfriend had ripped off millions of dollars in a bunch of fraudulent real estate schemes where he gulled his victims by pretending to be an agent of the Catholic Church, she was probably looking for a face-saving out to not face his victims week after week.

  10. Jenkins: None Dare Call It Default
    A nicer term for what’s about to sock the middle class is ‘entitlement reform.’
    http://online.wsj.com/article/…..on_LEADTop

    Here’s what you weren’t told about Medicare during the presidential debates. Under the Paul Ryan plan, the affluent would pay more. Under the Obama plan, the affluent would flee Medicare to escape the waiting lists, shortages and deteriorating quality as Washington economizes by ratcheting down reimbursements to doctors and hospitals. Don’t call either default. You don’t have a legally enforceable right to the free care you imagined you were promised.

    “Don’t worry” was President Obama’s implicit message during the campaign: If cutting subsidies for Big Bird is unthinkable, a joke, how much more so cutting benefits for middle-class voters?

    1. According to my Mom, Paul Ryan is a racist devil who would feast upon the sinewy flesh of Baby Boomers left out in the cold, dark wastes after their hard working contribution to American Prosperity was unappreciated by the young.

      1. Tell us more about your Thanksgiving dinner conversation.

        1. I’ve already vented in the drone process thread.

      2. Tell her how much we appreciate their placing financial obligations on us generations before we were born. I love the choice of giving away substantial portions of my paycheck to generations which have had a full lifetime to earn and save some wealth, or going to jail.

        1. No, you’re the selfish one. Besides, all this could be fixed if we raised taxes on the megarich.

          1. No personal offense, db, but your mother seems like a cunt.

            She’s probably perfectly nice and great to be with, but her attitude is very much what is wrong with our country.

            1. My Mom is a really great woman, and has been an inspiration to me. She taught me many things as a child, and her insistence on educating me beyond the limitations of our local schools is something I am very grateful for. My great respect for her and gratitude for her actions makes it all the more bitter when I hear her advocating economically ignorant policies.

        2. and then they keep working, and not retiring, which stops the next generation from moving up the chain & making the money they could make.

          1. ZERO SUM GAME!!!!!

            1. I’m job hunting & also working for a 61 year old who refuses to retire, who then goes about saying “The job market is terrible! Look at all these people out of college/grad school/ etc who can’t find jobs!” And I want to tell her “Be part of the solution!”

  11. Facebook bans picture of a woman’s elbow.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..elbow.html

    1. Once you start showing woman’s elbows then its just a slippery slope until you start showing their ankles.

      1. ankles? I’ll be in my bunk.

    2. the appearance of indecency

      “What’s the ugliest
      Part of your body?
      What’s the ugliest
      Part of your body?
      Some say your nose
      Some say your toes
      (I think it’s your mind)
      But I think it’s YOUR MIND
      (Your mind)
      I think it’s your mind, woo woo”

      RIP Frank Zappa

      1. all your children are poor
        unfortunate victims of
        systems beyond their control
        a plague upon your
        ignorance & the gray
        despair of your ugly life

  12. Justin Bieber’s face just became even more punchable.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..ister.html

    1. Good for him for not showing deference to some politician.

      1. If he didn’t want to show deference, then he should have declined the honor.

        And I doubt the Biebs had any such noble endeavor in mind. He’s just a twerp.

      2. it’s not about deference, it’s about having some class. You don’t show up at the banquet in shorts and flip flops, either.

        1. ‘The pic of me and the Prime Minister was taken in a room in the arena where i was performing at that day. I walked straight from my meet and greet to him.
          ‘It wasn’t like it was like I was going into his environment we were at a hockey arena.’

          1. Speaking of, apologies if I offended you.

            1. what a confusing comment! Are you adding in what the Biebster should have said? Actually apologising to me for some offence I did not notice? Weird. We’re all good

              1. I’m glad I’m getting used to all these “s”, “c”, and I always had a love affair with the superfluous “u”.

                The UKR’s that speak English understand almost only Commonwealth. I asked to have the stuff I had shipped here offloaded from the “truck”, and he asked me “Where? (Gde)”, since “truck” is a verb. I remembered the term “lorry”, and he immediately understood what I wanted.

    2. I don’t see the problem. Overalls are formal wear in Canada.

      1. I understand that flannel six-button PJ nightgowns and knee socks are lingerie there as well.

          1. That’s disturbing. What’s with the kid showing his crotch to the camera like a bad Oui centerfold?

      2. what’s formal wear in Kentucky?

          1. Your uncle Billy Borat Bob?

          1. You’ve got to be an extra kind of dumb to be on that show. They don’t even hide their faces; you might as well just set up a still on the ATF’s lawn.

            1. it’s the show that requires you to take that extra step in the suspension of disbelief – that reality shows totally depict reality; nothing is staged. Ever.

              1. You mean to tell me that ‘Tickle’ ain’t his real name?

                1. No no, that’s real. Last name “Elmo”, middle name “Me”

    3. You can’t fool me, that’s Hillary Swank.

  13. Cops kill dog. Nothing else happens.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..-them.html

  14. The Egyptian president Muhammed Morsi met with the country’s top judges to insist his unilateral power-grab this weekend was just temporary.

    This next Arab Spring they’re definitely going to mean it.

    1. his next Arab Spring they’re definitely going to mean it.

      That would be the Arab Summer…Summer Naive, Summer Not.

    2. You know who else had a “temporary” power grab?

      1. the False Dmitri?

      2. Senator Palpatine?

      3. Lord Humungus?

      4. Michael Jackson?

      5. Hmmm…Roy Orbison?

      6. Roy Orbison?

        1. Feckin’ squirrels..

  15. A Lot Of Jets Fans Who Were Pissed Off, Ridiculously Dressed, Or Both
    http://deadspin.com/5962896/la…..ed-or-both

    Perhaps you heard the Jets lost in arather hilarious fashion. The Patriots beat New York up, down, sideways, and into dimensions not yet discovered or even imagined. The result? A lot of sad Jets fans, many of whom put on their finest in turkeyhat millinery just for the occasion. Here are some of the highlights.

    1. So bad Fireman Ed renounced his jersey and helmet because hew as getting picked on for being a Sanchez supporter.

      1. mine too.. the little hats make it.

        1. HA! That pic used to be my avatar on the Survivor Sucks discussion boards. Love me some Sean Connery orange diaper.

        2. So that’s where Aussies got their sense of style.

        3. thanks! I needed a laugh.

    2. A lot of sad Jets fans

      BooEffingHoo

    3. A lot of sad Jets fans . . .

      Makes for a very happy mad libertarian guy.

    4. It’s really just the annual 9/11 game. The Jets may make an early statement, but in the end the Patriots will whoop some ass. U-S-A!

      1. Shoot…

        It’s really just the annual 9/11 game. The Jets may make an early statement impact, but in the end the Patriots will whoop some ass. U-S-A!

        1. Yeah, an early impact directly into the right guard’s mammoth ass.

          I do love how all of the Jets fumbles went directly to the Pats, as if they had pigskin-attracting magnets on their hands, and in positions where they was no chance of being tackled by the offense. It was pretty hilarious, especially since I’m hoping Mike Tannenbaum gets fired post haste.

          But hey, at least one of the college teams I root for can’t challenge for a conference or national championship because bartering free shit is somehow illegal while the other one choked a chance to clinch their conference against the terrible Pitt Panthers. Oh, and they’ll soon be in the same conference, so my tidy and well-working arrangement will no longer be tenable.

          I hate football.

    5. ” into dimensions not yet discovered or even imagined”

      So, good news for string theory then?

  16. Richard Simmons is still a weirdo.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs…..class.html

  17. China lands jet on aircraft carrier.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..power.html

    1. And 15 minutes later it needed to land again?

    2. Silly Chinese, don’t they know that the Chinese have missiles which render Aircraft Carriers obsolete.

      1. China’s aircraft carrier will be good for projecting force into the littoral seas, while protected by an umbrella of kinetic energy death from above.

        1. You forgot synergies

          1. Proactive synergies, at that.

            1. Clearly, since the land war in Asia isn’t going so well, we need to shift to a naval war in Asia.

  18. A Conservative member of Parliament in Britain wants patients to pay for their own medication when it comes to lifestyle-related conditions, because
    personal responsibility is not yet vestigial in the island country.

    Unlike in their former colonies…

  19. A Conservative member of Parliament in Britain wants patients to pay for their own medication when it comes to lifestyle-related conditions, because personal responsibility is not yet vestigial in the island country.

    Say, Guv’nah, have you heard tell of a little bird with the appearance of a Doozer from Fraggle Rock who goes by the name Sandra Fluke?

    Yeah, good luck with that one…

    1. I always thought she smelled of radishes.

  20. Thomas the tortoise celebrates 130th birthday.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..Blitz.html

    1. and he looks better than COurtney Love…..

  21. Failure Of Walmart Walkout Underscores Union Decline
    http://news.investors.com/ibd-…..ailure.htm

    The union had a bit more luck elsewhere, but it appears to have been a massive failure at creating anything like a problem for Walmart ? which was the union’s real goal, not “organizing” workers, as claimed.

    Indeed, as of early afternoon on Black Friday, Walmart said it had sold 1.8 million towels, 1.3 million TVs, 1.3 million dolls and 250,000 bicycles.

    “We estimate that less than 50 associates participated in the (union) protest nationwide,” said Walmart CEO Bill Simon. “In fact, this year, roughly the same number of associates missed their scheduled shift as last year.”

    1. You’re a towel.

  22. Man jailed for four days for legally recording police.
    http://www.photographyisnotacr…..ding-cops/
    Nothing else happened.

  23. Ken Burns: Secession Movement Spurred by Racism
    http://www.nationalreview.com/…..na-johnson

    Documentarian Ken Burns appeared as a panelist on Meet the Press this morning to discuss Steven Spielberg’s Lincoln. As the conversation veered to contemporary politics, Burns argued, in essence, that the secession movement we’re seeing in the wake of the election is spurred by racism. The basis for this claim, I believe, is the same as for the claims that opposition to a potential Susan Rice nomination is an indication of racism.

    video at link.

    1. Ken Burns makes a decent documentary, but is otherwise a twat.

      1. His movie about the Old Negro Space Program should have won an Oscar.

        1. I thought it did.

          And the Academy Award for Best Slideshow with Melodramatic Background Music goes to….

          1. I don’t think sqeaky fiddle music works too well with space walks.

      2. “a” being the operative word – I’ve only seen one decent Ken Burns docu – Lewis & Clark.

        1. I thought Jazz wasn’t bad.

          1. If you don’t mind the Wynton Marsalis monopolized history of jazz.

            1. The guy’s a fucking genius. Learn from him.

      3. I may be in the minority, but I really didn’t like the Civil War documentary. Too much letter reading over slowly panned photographs. I wanted more (some?) tactical maps of the action and force disbursement.

        1. They really need to get the Total War engine and go to town on battle sims.

      4. Ken Burns makes a decent documentary

        Citation, please?

          1. Copyright 2002 WETA. All rights reserved. | PBS Privacy Policy

            That site is like a thousand years old. How am I suppose to understand it?

          2. Empire of the Air was pretty good because I’d never really heard the story. There was also far less melodramatic letter reading and slow paced, half-assed narration than I’ve come to expect from Ken Burns.

            1. I’ll check it out. If it avoids the Burns schtick, it might not be too annoying for a sit through.

    2. when in doubt, racism. I am still amazed that some see criticism of Susan Rice as race-based but never go there with any critique of Condi Rice.

      1. I’m amazed they go there with any critique of Uncle Ben’s Rice.

      2. Because Rice was in a Republican administration and therefore not really black.

          1. I prefer Thin Mints, thanks. Fresh from the freezer served with whole milk.

            1. the best product from the evil girl scout bakery.

              1. Samoas would like a word with you.

              2. Just buy them at Wal-Mart. Their version tastes just as good and you can get them year round.

                1. I don’t have a Wal-Mart here. _((((

                  I’m not flying for 15+ hours for a box of piss poor, imitation Thin Mints.

          2. House nigger, uncle Tom, or, liberal favorite, lawn jockey.

            Anything but a black person who dares not believe in what the liberal elite tell him/her what is and is not.

      3. Remember the editorial cartoonist Oliphant’s ‘parrot’ (to GWBush) Condi Rice?

        Disrespectful and misogynist — but funny, man!

    3. But it wasn’t racist when states were talking secession during BOOOOOOSH, see?

      1. Funny how they never go after Canada for not accepting DC total rule.

    4. Those racist Catalans. Secession from a grasping, bankrupt, incompetent central government? I never!
      http://www.washingtonpost.com/…..llery.html

    5. A temper tantrum? Sure. Racism? Isn’t it always racism when it involves Team RED? I mean, everything they’ve ever done is racist. How could they possibly have substantive policy criticisms of The One? if they weren’t based in racism?

      1. obviously it’s racism. Prior to The Obama, no POTUS was ever criticized for anything.

    6. I really don’t mind any of his videos (why his TV shows get called “films” I don’t understand). But if I ever see him close up again, one of my life goals is to start a fight with him. Just because he is such a twat.

      The other guy who does all of the research and writing (can’t think of his name right now), is a much more interesting and less of a twat.

  24. Atomic Bomb v. Cod Fillets
    http://www.improbable.com/2012…..d=noscript

    A few cartons of Birds Eye frozen cod fillets sit in the freezer of a small house in southern Nevada, US. It’s 4 in the morning. Suddenly, an agonisingly bright light sears through the kitchen ? a 39 kiloton nuclear bomb has detonated just 400 metres away?

    Question:What happens to the cod fillets?

    1. Tax dollars at work.

    2. They grab their bullwhips and start hunting for alien skulls.

    3. “Frozen food samples from the stations at 1270 and 2750ft were found to be definitely radioactive, particularly the cod fillets.”

      Nevertheless* they were ;

      “Tasted by a panel of quality-control experts and executives of the frozen-food industry at the Town House in Los Angeles on May 10, 1955.”

      US Gov: These cod fillets? Oh, we’re just experimenting with new types of rations. Don’t worry, it’s not like they’re radioactive or anything!

    4. What about InstaMash and Cram?

      1. I’m a BlamCo man.

        1. Coddled ingrates with your prepackaged meals. I only kill the finest Mirelurks and Yao Guai with my bare hands and feast on their delicious flesh!

          1. I prefer the high radiation brown toilet water

          2. I prefer the Crispy Squirrel Bits, despite never having seen a squirrel in the Waste (Capital or Mojave).

          3. I find the “strange meat” to be a wonderful pork substitute.

  25. state budget was designed around auctions generating 7 times their actual revenue so far.

    They just need to auction off some more, right?

  26. Judge stops school from expelling girl who refused to wear tracking device.

    http://rt.com/usa/news/school-…..udent-449/

    1. On her part, she equates wearing a badge ? RFID equipped or not ? with the biblical “mark of the beast.”

      Public schools, the beast… she might be onto something

      1. Granted, I would have preferred she contest it on personal liberty and privacy oriented grounds instead of religious ones, but beggars can’t be choosers I suppose.

        1. Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

          Uh, First Amendment grants freedom of religion and speech. The Founders did put the BOR in the order they did for a reason…

          1. I don’t see how wearing the badge prohibits the free exercise of religion. Is there some sort of mind control device in it? I think that privacy, or “fuck you” would have been better arguments, but whatever works is good, I guess. I always have a bit of a problem with decisions based on religion because the courts claim the right to determine what is and is not religion.

        2. Religious liberty is individual liberty.

        3. I wonder if she seriously believes any of that or if she just used it as it was the most likely to win/easiest to defend.

  27. The Obama Administration drafted rules for the use of drones in anticipation of a Mitt Romney win…

    I’m sure the new rules are dripping with irony as they sit in the trash can.

    1. The Higher Awareness of the Light Worker is impervious to irony.

    2. Just a glimmering of:

      Me today, you tomorrow.

      Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem to have stuck.

    3. Hemoglobin is iron-y.

  28. South African President Jacob Zuma has killed 12 cows in a ritual designed to help his re-election.

    Or bought votes with a BBQ. Either way, 10/10 for style

    1. It’s very Paleo.

  29. We’re living the dream; we just don’t realize it
    http://www.cnn.com/2012/11/24/…..?hpt=op_t1

    Over the past two decades, what have the U.S. trends been for the following important measures of social health: high school dropout rates, college enrollment, juvenile crime, drunken driving, traffic deaths, infant mortality, life expectancy, per capita gasoline consumption, workplace injuries, air pollution, divorce, male-female wage equality, charitable giving, voter turnout, per capita GDP and teen pregnancy?

    The answer for all of them is the same: The trend is positive. Almost all those varied metrics of social wellness have improved by more than 20% over the past two decades. And that’s not counting the myriad small wonders of modern medicine that have improved our quality of life as well as our longevity: the anti-depressants and insulin pumps and quadruple bypasses.

    1. What, exactly, does lower gasoline consumption have to do with “social health”?

      1. probably means people aren’t sniffing it but can afford proper drugs

      2. CO2 is a known poison and pollutant, RC. It’s toxic to The Earth’s atmosphere. Everyone resides under The Earth’s atmosphere. Residents of Planet Earth are social animals.

        Therefore, everyone and thing social residing under The Earth’s atmosphere is being poisoned.

        QED

        Was that so hard, RC? -D

      3. If it meant that people have more money to spend on other things, it would be good.

    2. reason routinely makes the same claim only adding that Morgan and Rockefeller couldn’t afford an iPhone.

  30. So the Walmart a mile from my house made the news on Black Friday. I was going to go pick up some ammo for going to the range Saturday.

    Authorities believe a disagreement over a parking space led to two people being shot and wounded outside a Walmart in Tallahassee.

  31. Two Audio updates:

    a review of the 80s/early 90s era Spica TC-50 speaker
    http://6streetbridge.blogspot……akers.html

    and no, it doesn’t hold a candle to my regular UREI speakers. Not even close.

    and I install a new circuit board on a 1958-era Acrosound 20 tube amplifier.
    http://6streetbridge.blogspot……pdate.html

    1. I’m torn on this one, as both a VAX requirement and getting TB tests and Hep titers is mandatory for medical jobs with direct patient care.

      1. Let’s just say that in Libertopia I would both invest in and patronize the private hospitals that did such a thing.

      2. Serious question, Doc: Why stop there? Why not require pneumonia shots? Whay not require typhoid shots?

        1. Depending on which area of the hospital or facility one works, pneumonia VAX is highly recommended and a few, like working with immuno-compromised patients, are indeed mandatory.

          Generally, most facilities in the US either require or “highly recommend” VAX for illnesses that are statistically, from an epidemiological POV, the most likely to be transmitted, either Patient to Caregiver, vice-versa, or Patient to Patient.

          Typhus does not meet this standard since the statistical likelihood of contracting typhus is pretty low, but tuberculosis does, and once exposed and it develops, can be lethal. And I do support testing of all immigrants to this country for communicable diseases. UKR required this of me, and my cat, and I see no problem with it.

          1. Pretty much what we do, although if someone has a religious or medical (snerk) objection to getting vaccinated we look around for something else they can do.

          2. I had to get a TB x-ray (at the Zurich airport clinic!) to work in Switzerland in the early 90s.

          3. “And I do support testing of all immigrants to this country for communicable diseases.”

            RACIST!

        2. Oh, I also forgot to mention that most of these diseases are very virulent and pathogenic (meaning easily spread and cause disease easily), and most especially TB, are both very difficult and expensive to treat, and TB active incubates for a very long period of time.

          The last thing you want is an outbreak of TB in any hospital or facility and the The Flu does kill people every year.

          Look at it like this: The Black Plague killed a 1/3 of Europe in a very short period of time for a short duration.

          The Flu, over a longer period of time, has killed way more people in its various strains.

    2. my employer offers free flu shots. I accept, partly because I hate the flu but mostly for the lollipop the nurse gives me

      1. She only gives you a lollipop?

      2. What?! No nifty band-aid with Smurfs or Hello Kitty on it?

        1. i have my own stash of amusing bandaids:

          The Wiggles
          Skull ‘n’ crossbones
          crime scene tape
          Jesus

      3. You don’t give her a lollypop?

  32. Boxer Macho Camacho dead after being shot.

    http://abcnews.go.com/ABC_Univ…..LN4gofAdqU

    1. I want to know how they could tell he was brain dead.

      1. he was laughing at Family Guy

        1. my wife HATES that show with the heat of a thousand suns.

          1. You made a good choice when you married her.

  33. A Conservative member of Parliament in Britain wants patients to pay for their own medication when it comes to lifestyle-related conditions, because personal responsibility is not yet vestigial in the island country.

    He must be racist.

  34. I suspect most have you have already heard, but Shreeek’s favorite “Hero of Capitalism” wants all MEGARICH BLOODSUCKERS not named Warren Buffett to pay a minimum tax.

    Bonus reference to the salutary effects of high marginal tax rates on GDP growth.

    QED, suckers. Pay up.

    1. BULL MARKET coming, so says shreeek.

      1. Did it mention Record. Corporate. Profitzzzes!, or anything about the rampant Bush Apologia on this wingnut populated board?

    2. I will not miss Warren when he’s pushing daisies.

      1. I’m still laughing over him calling George Soros a respected capitalist.

        You know, the convicted felon who engaged in insider trading.

        1. And a currency speculator.

          1. And a Nazi Collaborator.

            1. You know who else was a Nazi Collaborator?

        2. Why won’t George travel to France? HA!

        3. There are plenty of reasons to despise Soros but I’m fine with the currency/commodity specualtion Soros engages. I’m not sure you can really call it capitalist since he doesn’t actually make anything that people want, just is good at capitalizing on the herd mentality of the markets.

  35. Also, Eli Manning once again completely fucked me in the Pick’em league. In 11 picks involving the Giants, I’m 1-10, all other teams 114-49. Its a good thing I spent Sunday doing non-football related activities, otherwise, killing spree. Fuck you, Eli.

    1. The Packers fucked you by not showing up to play. ๐Ÿ™

      1. That’s a generous description. I like how the pressure on Rodgers is apparently never enough to get him to let go of the g-d ball.

        1. I would have been disappointed had the Packers played this badly against, say, Houston. But New York fans are so obnoxious (probably tied with Boston fans for the worst) that I want to see New York teams lose every week.

          1. Let me introduce you to a place called Philadelphia.

            1. Speaking of Philly, do I really have to pick a winner between the Panthers and the Eagles? Everybody in America loses tonight.

              1. I sucked so much this week. I picked the favorite in all 4 upsets, got both of the even spread games wrong, and missed on both of my “upset” picks. It’s like I’m on the god damned Chargers.

    2. Yeah, and how about those Steelers running backs? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA FUCK YOU ROETHLISBERGER

      1. I think he’s got about three years left in him, tops.

        1. To live? I hope.

          1. Roethlisbergers don’t die. They slumber for a thousand years until it’s time to feed again.

        1. Did you respond to the wrong comment? I don’t see any Federer hate there.

          1. ROETHLISBERGER – Swiss-America’s finest athlete. I think. Who knows?

      2. I even picked this one right. Good on you guys. Fuck the Steelers.

    3. My best series of bets were on the Phoenix Suns-Bulls match up in ’93. Called every game racked up some sweet lucre.

  36. The Irish Republicans are eyeing a new terror campaign,

    I knew it! Rachel Maddow told me Republicans were violent!

    1. It should be Southern Irish.

      1. Like my great-grandma always said: we’re lace Irish, not shanty Irish.

        1. So the shanty Irish have morphed into the “bomb in a culvert” Irish?

  37. Oh noes, the scientists might have to suffer with everybody else at the fiscal cliff.

    I have zero sympathy. Latch on to the government tit, suffer when it runs dry.

    The Bureau of Labor Statistics reported 1,082,370 U.S. citizens employed in the life sciences, such as biology and genetics, as well as physical and social sciences. Of these, approximately 31,000 stand to lose their jobs if sequestration takes place, according to a study conducted for the Aerospace Industries Association by Steve Fuller, director of the Center for Regional Analysis and professor of public policy at George Mason University.

    1. I’ve never understood why science taking money from Big Government and then saying we need more government is treated as legitimate.

      1. Because they’re scientists, and they’re incorruptible by money.

        /sarc

        1. Unless it’s evul Korporashun money!

          1. Most of it was evil corporation money, but it’s been sanctified by the sacrament of taxation.

    2. To think that they may still suffer even after throwing Obama a Thanksgiving parade.

  38. I just recently learned about Ebates. Essentially, it is a company that pays you to click on links to shopping sites and buy shit. They are paying you for clicks so that they can charge for ads. Sell off all your internet stocks, dudes. That bubble has to be just about ready to pop.

    1. “That bubble has to be just about ready to pop.”

      It hasn’t already?!

      1. The new one. The “recovery” bubble.

        1. Again, it hasn’t already? ๐Ÿ™‚

          1. GIVE ME MOAR BUBBLES

            1. Tiny bubbles, in the wine….make me feel happy, make me feel fine!

              /Don Ho off

              1. 25 years ago, Games magazine ran a contest: they noted that most palindromes looked terribly artificial, so they challenged readers to send in palindromes using the names of famous people.

                Half a dozen entrants independently came up with “Oh no, Don Ho!”

                The winner, and this shows the age of the contest, was “Lisa Bonet ate no basil.” They also gave an honorable mention to one entrant who rather ingeniously entered, “If Arnold Schwarzenneger were kidnapped, bound and gagged, and placed in the trunk of a car, his muffled plas for help might sound something like this:” and then reversed that with arbitrary spaces for word breaks.

              1. I have this on a 78 rpm record.

                1. What’s the bitrate of a 78 rpm record vs a 33 or 45?

    2. I thought that when I saw the quibids commercial. Bid up the price of something $0.01, pay $0.61 (whether you win or not) for the privilege to do so. If this is a viable company, we are so fucked.

      1. Each bid on Quibids costs 61 cents? I knew the business model was based on scamming people into paying for the bids, but I didn’t realize the bids cost that much.

        1. I thought they were like 10 cents each, which I still thought was outrageous.

        2. I never really thought about what their business model was, but holy crap, that’s like a real-time pyramid scheme.

  39. important measures of social health

    FUCK YOU, CNN.

  40. Gen. Allen has proposed maintaining a force between 6,000 and 15,000 U.S. troops to conduct training and counterterrorism efforts

    Because the Afghan security forces just haven’t had enough opportunities to kill U.S. troops who are conducting training in Afghanistan. We need to fight them over there, so that we don’t have to fight them over here.

    1. This. If we *must* “train” AFGHAN FIGHTERS, leave behind a bunch of comic-book-type manuals.

      1. Considering the 12% literacy rate (when I was there, long ago) comic books might be the best training materials to use.

    2. That didn’t take long! Allen gets a pass on most of the Jill Kelley emails a couple of days ago and then he comes out with this. If he does a good job at it, wonder what the outcome will be? A letter in his file written on a post-it note?

  41. I may be in the minority, but I really didn’t like the Civil War documentary. Too much letter reading over slowly panned photographs.

    Holy shit, it was like six (ten? seventy?) hours of people reading bumper stickers. I think the longest continuous body of text was the fucking Gettysburg Address, which clocks in at just over two minutes, as I recall.

    But I did learn about Sedgewick.

    “Don’t worry, boys. They couldn’t hit an elephant at this distance.”

    1. Idiots? Scum.

    2. “I’ve found a pile of money we haven’t stolen yet!”

    3. All to save $100 billion.

      Yes, let’s have a protracted and ugly fight over two weeks worth of spending.

      1. Only about 9 days, actually.

        1. Not being a math asshole, I was just wondering how many days so I could throw it in people’s faces if they brought up the article.

          1. It’s a lost cause when you bring up the fact if every last red cent and asset was of every EVUL RICH TOP 1%-er was relieved, it would only fund the government for, what was it, 6 months or so?

            1. I think it’s actually three. I thought it was six, too.

              1. We can get 3 moar days of glorious post-BOOOOOSH! utopia out of this?

                WHEN DO WE START?

          2. Not being a math asshole, I was just wondering how many days so I could throw it in people’s faces if they brought up the article.

            Yes, you have to get that shit as low as possible for anything to sink in.

    4. Social engineering through the tax code. The beast that will not die.

      1. Stealing is the end, not the means.

    5. Whoa! Never saw THIS one coming!

      And hence why I switched two years ago to saving after-tax instead of pre-tax money.

      FUCK YOU, GOVERNMENT – I SAW THIS ONE COMING! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

      Oh, wait….inflation. YOU BASTARDS!

    6. the title screams that the battle has been lost – these accounts cost the govt. Because it’s not your money being put into these accounts, it is the govt’s.

      1. Anything untaxed is lost revenue.

        Learn it, live it, love it.

      2. Not only that but

        and they might not be helping us save.

        So apparently they’re evil magic that ‘costs’ the government money by not being used … or something.

    7. The only thing worse than the article are the comments, but this is the part that kills me most:

      Even if $100 billion wouldn’t go all that far toward solving America’s debt problems . . .

      The author outright acknowledges that fucking people with 401ks wouldn’t do a goddamn thing to help out with fiscal insolvency, but goes ahead for 13 more paragraphs as to why we should do it anyways.

      What the fuck is wrong with people that they would enthusiastically advocate for something they know will be completely ineffective, while screwing tens of millions of people in the process?

      1. Intentions are more important than results.

      2. What the fuck is wrong with people that they would enthusiastically advocate for something they know will be completely ineffective, while screwing tens of millions of people in the process?

        We’ll just ban any 401(k) over 16 ounces.

      3. What the fuck is wrong with people that they would enthusiastically advocate for something they know will be completely ineffective, while screwing tens of millions of people in the process?

        It’s almost like that last part is the whole point.

    8. The accounts cost the government billions

      Jesus fucking Christ.

    9. Not like this tack wasn’t to be expected post-election–it’s really the only thing left to raid by the government that has some semblance of money available–but anyone could have seen this coming years ago.

      Slate is nothing if not the purveyor of SWPL mental dysfunction. Witness this statement:

      The lack of necessary data on Americans’ incomes and savings is what motivated Harvard economists Raj Chetty and John Friedman to partner with researchers in Copenhagen, who had access to the complete tax records of every Danish citizen over the past couple of decades. What’s more, some recent changes in the Danish tax system allowed them to examine how taxpayers respond to shifts in tax-based incentives to save.

      Right, because a highly socialized, low-scale, culturally homogenous society like Denmark is TOTALLY equivalent to the United States. It’s amazing that SWPLs never seem to understand the limits of scale.

      1. Or Sweden. Or Norway. Or Japan, even. I guess Cuba could also apply, but I am not sure of their demographics off the top of my head.

  42. That bubble has to be just about ready to pop.

    Not if Helicopter Ben has anything to say about it.

  43. Let’s get rid of 401(k)s!

    I wonder why Kindly Old Grandpa Buffett hasn’t come out in favor of a wealth tax. I can’t understand it.

    1. Give him time, Brooksie…give him time. Not enough time has elapsed since The Donald Tee-Rump proposed it.

  44. Barbasol Ben Bernanke’s bonehead debt binge is a ticking time bomb that is set to blow up all our retirement plans when it detonates.

    1. “Yes, you speak some English?”
      “Son of bitch! Shit!”

  45. Holy fuck. “Get yoah ahss to Mahs!”

    Elon Musk, the billionaire founder and CEO of the private spaceflight company SpaceX, wants to help establish a Mars colony of up to 80,000 people by ferrying explorers to the Red Planet for perhaps $500,000 a trip.

    I could probably find someone who would be willing to give me $500k to leave the US (and Earth) forever and quit voting. Or maybe $250k each from Dems and ‘Phants.

    1. I’d shell out $100 toward Dick Durbin’s ticket.

    2. Maybe we can make the Free Planet Project?

  46. Yay. My professional life takes yet another hit! Today I am to train someone how to do my job. Not as a backup for when I’m out, but as the primary. My boss assures me I will still “coordinate” and this new person would “do that actual work”.

    Fuck. work.

    How can I go on disability and/or welfare? Also, I hear the Power Ball jackpot is rather large this week.

    1. Quietly check the Worker’s Comp laws of your jurisdiction – find something non-specific and highly compensable (ie. in CA combining a “stress” claim with a vague orthopedic complaint can add a nifty 19% or more to your “disability” rating/payment) and begin to complain, mildly, of your chosen malady. If you see you are going to be sacked, then loudly complain and see a doc. While on WC, prepare to spew disability claims and retaliatory discharge suits like a squid releasing an ink screen.

      /milking the system off

    2. Do you know SQL?

      1. Nope, Spoonman. I pretty much do front end development – HTML, CSS, a little Javascipt and PHP. I think I’ll spend the holiday season beefing up the technical skills.

    3. I do feel for you.

      A couple months back my boss had me show her how to do a number of tasks I do which she was supposed to take over. After a few days of running through the details she gave up on most of it since it was either too much work or too technical for her to follow – both for her and for everybody she tried to delegate to. I didn’t bother to tell her that is why I was hired (by the local top Mgr) for this position.

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