A.M. Links: Bill Clinton Spins a Tale for the Crowd, Budget Brinksmanship, Waterboarding Galore


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  1. A nice George Will article on the history of Progressive Presidents:

    Obama: the real radical

    Progress, as progressives understand it, means advancing away from, up from, something. But from what?

    From the Constitution’s constricting anachronisms. In 1912, Wilson said, “The history of liberty is the history of the limitation of governmental power.” But as Kesler notes, Wilson never said the future of liberty consisted of such limitation.

    Instead, he said, “every means .?.?. by which society may be perfected through the instrumentality of government” should be used so that “individual rights can be fitly adjusted and harmonized with public duties.” Rights “adjusted and harmonized” by government necessarily are defined and apportioned by it. Wilson, the first transformative progressive, called this the “New Freedom.” The old kind was the Founders’ kind ? government existing to “secure” natural rights (see the Declaration) that preexist government. Wilson thought this had become an impediment to progress. The pedigree of Obama’s thought runs straight to Wilson.

    1. Tony will be along any moment now to tell us that Natural Rights are unempirical, and thus derive from “magic” and not real rights at all, while his Legal Rights are superior and why are we being so obtuse?

    2. Anybody else feel a cold chill on their neck reading that tripe?

      1. As terrible as Carter was and Obama is, Wilson is the one I despise the most.

        1. Worst president in US History, hands down.

          1. I’d like to see him in a death match with FDR.

            1. FDR wins, IMO, based on WW1 v WW2. We had no reason to get into the first, FDR waited until after Pearl Harbor to ask for a Declaration of War, which puts him above Bush, on that standard.

              Bush never requested a DoW against Afghanistan. Fucker.

              1. Eh FDR did everything he could to get us into WWII. USS Reuben James for example.

                I think FDR was less outright evil then Wilson, but did a lot more damage.

            2. Whoever wins, WE LOSE.

      2. It felt more like a wet warmth.

        Oh, that’s just the pols pissing on my leg while telling me it’s raining…

  2. Bubba did so well he’s going to have to deliver Obama’s speech for him.

    1. Never happen. But he *could* pinch hit for Biden in the debates.

    2. Bubba needs an editor or maybe one of those big gorilla hands like on the old Gong Show to get him off stage. He starts out great but then doesn’t know when to shut up.

      1. He needs a gorilla mask.

      2. My father called him the windup doll. He just goes until he runs out of energy.

      3. All politicians love the sound of their own voice to some extent, but Bill Clinton is the most egregious example of it we’ve had on the national stage for quite some time.

      4. Have some pity for the man. Without applause or an intern does he really exist?

  3. Justice Dept. Gallup lawsuit came after Axelrod criticized pollsters

    Internal emails between senior officials at The Gallup Organization, obtained by The Daily Caller, show senior Obama campaign adviser David Axelrod attempting to subtly intimidate the respected polling firm when its numbers were unfavorable to the president.

    After Gallup declined to change its polling methodology, Obama’s Department of Justice hit it with an unrelated lawsuit that appears damning on its face.

    damn… Chicago-style (racist!) politics.

    1. I’m sure it was just a coincidence…

    2. They pull a knife, you pull a gun. They put one of yours in the hospital, you put one of theirs in the morgue.

  4. i luvs me sum wild bill !11!!!111

    1. Thank you for sharing your proclivities, Urine.

  5. Hey gang, is there a special term for a commenter/troll that goes back to a dead thread to get in his/her last word?

    1. corpsefucker?

      1. So far I’m going with this.

    2. I don’t know now, but I’ll reply at 3AM with something snarky.

    3. Viking Moose.

  6. And in the most important news, Eli Manning’s bobblehead failed me in the opening game of the Reason Bigorati pick ’em. No doubt his brother will also fuck me. Goddammit.

    Also, congrats to Banjos, Auric, Citizen N and the others I don’t recognize for leading the league at this point. I hate you all.

    1. I should’ve gotten in on the pick ’em, but it was on Yahoo, and I already have so many other useless accounts that I didn’t want to create one more.

      1. You can use your google account too. Only reason I did it.

        1. Could I join still and play catch up? I didn’t know that, damn.

          1. Should have refreshed…

        2. I’m trying to sign in to the league through my Google account (one of the options on the Yahoo login page) and it keeps kicking me back to the Yahoo login. Does anyone know if I’m skipping a step?

          1. I just click the Google button and it opens another window briefly, then proceeds. My google account is also signed in.

      2. You can still join, you’ll just miss the one game.

        Just click this linky.

        League ID: 38814
        password: reason

        Give me a few minutes to modify the signup process.

        1. Now I remember why I hadn’t tried before: my work computer blocks yahoo for some reason. I’ll try to do it through my phone though. Thanks!

          1. No problem. The only thing is, since you’re late we get to pick your user name.

            Any ideas, people?

            1. “Toasted Os”

              1. I was thinking “Joel Pile’s Little Lambs”.

                1. “Joel Pile’s Little Lambs”.

                  As long as we’re not calling anyone a sheepfucker. Because that would be wrong. Really, really wrong.

                  1. Where’s an attorney when you need one?

            2. Well I made it in and got my picks made. A morning well spent trying to navigate the Yahoo login page on my phone instead of working. I went with “Rub Me Wrong Time” but if it has to be changed it has to be changed.

    2. I was hoping I’d be the only one who got that right. I wanted to be solely in first for at least a day of the season.

    3. Yeah, but I’m also gonna pick the Bengals to win all their games, so you’ll have plenty of time to make up ground.

      1. Maybe they’ll go 19-0 and you’ll blow everyone out of the water.

        1. Maybe they’ll go 19-0 and you’ll blow everyone out of the water.

          Just as likely…

          1. It’s always possible that an epidemic breaks out across the NFL and the Bengals are mercifully spared.

            1. They’d still probably only manage to go 15-2. Even after the epidemic, they would tie the Raven’s defense 0-0.

              1. I have infinite confidence in the Bengals ability to throw a pick six in 2 games against the Ravens.

  7. …plenty of bipartisan discord feature in Bob Woodward’s book about the 2011 budget battle.

    As much as I don’t care for Woodward, I may have to read this book.

  8. Every child can potentially feel some level of uneasiness as the threat of a strike looms, Black said. Those who are naturally anxious or tend to be overachievers are at the highest risk of being the most stressed-out, while those who are more relaxed and roll with the punches will likely respond better, she said.

    This is the kind of keen insight one can get only from the director of child and adolescent services at the Family Institute at Northwestern University.

    1. If there’s a kid in Chicago not praying for strike, then we’re truly looking at a lost generation.

      1. I read strike as shriek. It makes more sense that way… when you’re caffeine deprived.

        1. And I assumed they ment armed raiders striking their neighborhoods while their families wait, unarmed, for the attacks.

          It’s just as likely in the Windy City after all.

          1. I assumed it was talking about kids in the middle east who had some sort of precognition about impending airstrikes by us drones.

  9. Lowry: The party of government

    God might have been left out of the party platform in a fit of absent-mindedness, but government would never suffer such an indignity. It is the Alpha and Omega. The maker of dreams, the giver of succor, the ultimate expression of community. When Democrats say “We’re all in it together,” what they really mean is that the Office of Extramural Research, Education and Priority Populations in the Department of Health and Human Resources needs twice as much funding.

    For Clinton Democrats, the era of Big Government was over. For Obama Democrats, the era of Big Government is now and ever shall be, world without end. Amen.

    1. And He looked up and saw the billionaires putting their gifts into the SuperPACs, 2 and He saw also a certain poor widow putting in just 3 dollars to His re-election campaign. 3 So He said, “Truly I say to you that this poor widow has put in more than all; 4 for all these out of their abundance have put in offerings for Me, but she sacrificed her pizza night to give all that she had.”

  10. Boys on the Side
    The hookup culture that has largely replaced dating on college campuses has been viewed, in many quarters, as socially corrosive and ultimately toxic to women, who seemingly have little choice but to participate. Actually, it is an engine of female progress?one being harnessed and driven by women themselves.


    1. So, since women are now objectifying themselves overtly I can lear all I want without getting the stinkeye, right?

      1. Welcome to the age of self-microagressing

        1. I heard self-microagressing makes you go blind.

          1. Leave my tiny hands out of this

      2. No you’ll still get the stankeye, but now you might get to fuck the fat ones.

    2. The writer seems a little too shocked that yes, young people have sex. Hell, girls in college were hooking up left and right during the 90s. Even little shy me got some action or hit on relentlessly at parties.

      1. You can throw the 80’s into the mix too, and depending where you went I hear the 70’s were like a gold rush mining town.

    3. “hookup culture” is made up. Fake. Manufactured. A lie.

    4. For some reason, I always used the phrases “hookup culture” and “campus social scene” as synonymous. Has there ever really been a difference between the two?

      1. Well, the anti-hookup-culture commentariat among women tends to come from a “traditional courtship” outlook, and they claim that before the hookup culture there was more assortative mating – that the “10” guys would monogamously date and fuck the “10” girls, and so forth with the 9’s, the 8’s, etc. And that now hookup culture has produced a situation where the high-number guys don’t end up in monogamous relationships at all, instead choosing to just FWB twenty girls at once in the 5-10 range.

        So this ends up screwing over high-status girls (who can’t assortatively date because their counterparts are getting too much no-strings tail) and medium-status guys (because the girls they used to date would rather be concubine #7 for a high-status guy).

        The amount of sex on campus didn’t change with the onset of hookup culture; just its distribution and the amount of monogamy women could demand for it. Or at least that’s the claim.

  11. Mainstream media needs to accept, own its liberal bias

    Liberal media bias isn’t merely in the eyes of conservative beholders. Large pluralities of the public routinely tell pollsters that the news media are too liberal. At least some journalists concede the point. There are so many left-leaning journalists, ABC’s then-political director Mark Halperin observed in 2006, “that it tilts the coverage quite frequently, in many issues, in a liberal direction.” On C-Span last March, Politico’s executive editor Jim VandeHei said there was ” no doubt” about the dominant mindset within the profession: “If you put all of the reporters that I’ve ever worked with on truth serum, most of them vote Democratic.”

    1. This is today’s “Cop Shoots Dog” story, right?

      1. back in the olden days, it would have been perfect John/MNG bait, spawning a 150+ comment thread.

        1. Ah, the memories….

          1. my middle finger would cramp spinning the scroll wheel.

            1. Spacebar. Use the spacebar. Short, strong thumbstrikes.

              1. Oooh…. it almost sounds like working.

            2. My middle finger often cramped in regards to many MNG posts.

  12. Parents are prepping for a walk-out by public-school teachers.

    Republicans sticking it to the working man again.

  13. Gee, sarcasmic and John haven’t banged on about fat women for aaaages! Time to kickstart them with a story about a fat munter who lost weight and is now a chubby munter

    1. Sadly, she spent all of her money on dieting and not getting her face fixed.

      1. On the bright side though, she didn’t lose her tits.

    2. She needs a little sunlight – of course, being in Britain, that may not be an option.

    3. I don’t know what a munter is, but if it means ugly and snaggle-toothed, I like it. And from the looks of the “black” pictures, the fat was what held her head up straight(ish).

    4. obviously the word “glamorous” has a different meaning over there.

      1. Maybe they’ve gone to the Jefferson County, FL standard. Having all of your teeth after you 21st birthday is “movie star good looking”.

        1. Man, living in the big city I forgot about the summer teeth you see in small towns.

          You know, summer here, summer there, summer gone…

    5. I don’t see anyone losing sleep about letting this one slip through their fingers.

  14. Earth To Conservatives: Immigrant Amnesty Is A Conservative Policy

    Latinos are religious, morally conservative and tend disproportionately to join the military. They also tend to be hard working and entrepreneurial. Do we really have too many of them?

    Do we really want to pack them up, forcibly, by the millions in the greatest forced migration in human history? How many are there, 15, maybe 20 million? No one has ever moved 15 million people against their will. No one has ever moved half that many without concentration camps, forced marches of one form or another and mass death through plague.

    1. That latter logistical concern is also why disarming millions of Americans for “safety” would also cause some sort of disaster. Probably dozens of Wacos to say the least.

    2. “Latinos are religious, morally conservative and tend disproportionately to join the military. They also tend to be hard working and entrepreneurial. Do we really have too many of them?”

      Stereotype much?

      1. How do you know he’s stereotyping?

        1. I dunno about Camping, but I live in Houston. Pick an adjective to apply to Latinos and I’ll find you an antonym Latino in under 5 minutes.

          1. Ok. “Superlative”.

        2. Because the statement is the definition of stereotyping?

          “a simplified and standardized conception or image invested with special meaning and held in common by members of a group”

          1. “Latinos are (generally) religious, morally conservative and tend disproportionately to join the military. They also tend to be hard working and entrepreneurial. Do we really have too many of them?”

            Does that help you out any?

            1. Not even an accurate stereotype. They don’t ‘disproportionately join the military’.

              They are slightly over-represented in the Marines, and slightly under-represented in the other branches.

              The only ethnic group I’m aware of as significantly over-represented in the military is black females in the Army.

      2. gee, I thought they all wore sombreros, sarapes, and slept in the shade all day. That’s my personal goal for living.

      3. Speaking in broad trends, that is a fact, not a stereotype.

        1. Sure, and if I said native Americans tend to be lazy and servile that wouldn’t be a stereotype either. Hell, there’s no such thing as a stereotype.

          1. Except in terms of tendency, you would have no evidence for that assertion.

            1. I have just as much evidence for that tendency as you would have for a Latino tending to be “hard working”.

                1. I await your evidence that Latinos are any more productive than any other ethnic group doing the same work.

                  1. I await your evidence that Latinos are any more productive than any other ethnic group doing the same work.

                    You really don’t know what the word “tend” means, do you?

                    1. Is that what you normally try pass off as evidence?

                    2. You tried to give me a bad package-deal.

                      I’m just rejecting your premise:

                      I await your evidence that Latinos are any more productive than any other ethnic group doing the same work.

                      Does that help you out any?

                    3. Using the word “tend” doesn’t prevent a statement from being stereotypical. Try again.

                    4. How dare the writer slur Latinos with neutral and positive attributes!

                  2. I’m not going to look for the link, but when Georgia booted out the illegals, the people that were hired (non-Latino), mostly quit by lunch time.

                    1. That would be crop picking, BTW.

    3. Where I live, they have been self deporting for a while now…why in the hell would you stay in a place that has no work, is cold, more expensive than the old country and you don’t speak the language?
      Its a little sad, seeing the shuttered stores and tacquerias, no more big family picnics at the parks. However, I don’t miss the Surenos and Latin Kings having recruiting problems.

      1. The problem with self-deportation is that it works best when conditions are shitty for the rest of us, too.

        Bring the economy back, and self-deportation ends.

        So how long do we endure a bad economy because some people hate Mexicans? Seems like a pretty high price to pay to not have to hear people speak Spanish in cities.

    4. You know there is such a thing as a religious socially conservative socialist. Just saying.

      1. You can say “Roman Catholics”, John

      2. Such people do seem to be quite common throughout the world.

        1. Mike Huckabee.

    5. Immigration is a distraction. Both sides want Latinos here. Team Red for the cheap labor, Team Blue to satisfy their thirst for social justice. As such, nothing will ever be done and as LH points out, nothing COULD be done even if they really wanted to.

      Debating illegal immigration is a waste of breath.

    6. “No one has ever moved 15 million people against their will.”

      Stalin disagrees with this claim.

    7. I like that Ron Paul pointed out that walls work just as well for keeping people in as keeping people out.

  15. Dem rep. tells Colbert slavery persisted in Brooklyn until 1898

    “Slavery. Really? I didn’t realize there was slavery in Brooklyn in 1898,” Colbert responded, seemingly looking to give the lawmaker a chance to catch her error.

    “I’m pretty sure there was,” Clarke responded.

    1. fucking dutch. Keepn’ the Black man down.

      1. Je hoort bij mij, vertegenwoordiger!

        1. you evil rollmoppin’ motherfucker!

          1. Rollmopping, aka tribadism.

    2. So which is dumber, this or the “its hard to get pregnant when raped” comment?

      Im going with this.

    3. Me and another Southerner in law school told people that slavery was still going on in Mississippi. People believed us.

      1. Well, it is Mississippi. Im willing to believe almost any idiotic thing you say about it. Even more so, Florida.

        1. I think that’s why it worked. Heck, maybe there is still slavery in Mississippi.

          1. I would assert that there is given the number of chain-gangs I’ve seen in Mississippi.

        2. Throughout most of Florida we only enslave Haitian kids. The one exception would be Orlando where anything goes because of Disney’s insatiable hunger for minority children to man the “It’s a Small World” ride.

      2. Were these people lobotomized? If not, when I can leave the planet?

        1. Worse yet–and I swear to God this is true–in college, a friend of mine and I told his girlfriend (a girl raised in NYC) that dogs and cats were the same species. She looked a little dubious until we asked her why she thought dogs chased cats around. Bought the whole thing. We laughed about that for weeks.

          She graduated with honors (mass comm, I think), which really hammered home for me the difference between academic achievement and intelligence.

          1. Dammit Lib, I can’t hate people any more than I already do. It is physically impossible! Stop trying to make me!

            1. She was a nice girl and provided sexual favors to my buddy. How can I hate her?

              1. Did you she provide you sexual favors? No? There’s your answer.

                1. No. My genes are too precious to risk in that manner.

                  1. I’m sure her body would have protected her from your seed, Pro Lib.

          2. I once proofread an honors thesis for a history student who didn’t know what a paragraph was for. Literally did not know that they were visual cues to logical separation of thoughts. This person also was my least favorite type of writer. People who consult thesauri without looking up the word they pick in a dictionary should be beaten, half-hanged, and lose a typing finger.

            Dude got a liberal arts degree with a 3.4 GPA. It made me despair.

            1. If she doesn’t meet your standards, lower them.

            2. Further evidence of the degradation of American education. Wouldn’t he (and the rest of us) have been better off if he just worked at Wal-Mart? Jesus.

              1. I lost all hope for American liberal arts education when I found out a History major never had to take a rhetoric class. (I’m not sure he was even familiar with the word.)

                1. One of my girls is in AP American History at a top-rated high school in the area. She’s getting points for decorating her notebook. In 11th grade. Even she thinks that’s nuts.

                  1. How many pieces of flair for an A? 15 or 26?

                    1. The kids also have gotten extra credit for bringing in supplies. Not for academic work, supplies. But they have a world-class auditorium.

      3. There is. It’s called “prison”.

        1. I meant the other kind of slavery. Besides, enslaving prisoners is perfectly legal. Read the text of the 13th Amendment.

  16. Waterboarding may have been a lot more common under the Bush administration than was previously revealed.

    Obama administration has their employment numbers, Bush administration has their ticking time bomb scenarios.

    1. Obama avoids the issue by just killing them with a drone strike. You never have to worry about interrogating dead people.

    2. O! has solved that… just vaporize them with a drone launched Hellfire – no more messy interrogations!

        1. Try using both hands. This comment was brought to you by Obvious Old Jokes, a wholly-owned subsidiary of IFH Global Industries

          1. That would only be a problem for the PM links, as I am at the office now…wait, did I type that out loud?!

  17. From the Chicago teacher strike article:

    In addition to worries about day care or how much a strike would disrupt a child’s education, some parents find themselves trying to explain to young children why their teachers might walk away from the classroom.

    It’s because of their love for the children.

    Teachers Unions are the absolute worst of all unions.

    1. I think a teacher’s strike could do wonders for a child’s education in certain “progressive” strongholds.

      1. Fire them all and start over. Think of all of the dead weight unfirable teachers they would get rid of.

        1. I agree. But there’s no way that would happen. And even if it did, it’s Chicago, so the ranks would just swell up with union parasites again.

          1. Maybe. But last night’s non-referee debacle gave me hope. The NFL pro refs are basically fucked if 15 more games go off that well. Maybe parents will ask why they’re paying teachers $60k/year plus bennies.

        2. Firing them is fine. The only way to start over is to not have a public school system. You will never get good teachers to stay if most of the students don’t want to be there.

          The only good thing I have to stay about teachers unions is that they bankrupt governments.

    2. “Teachers are, outside of family and close friends, the most important people in his life[.]”

      I feel sorry for this child of a professional grant writer.

    3. Teachers Unions are the absolute worst of all unions.

      Nope. Second to police.

      1. At least large squads of militarized teachers don’t go revenge-gunning when one of them dies “in the line of duty.”

      2. Nope. Second to police.


        Teachers have their clutches in most children, running little statist factories where the only thing that is rewarded is obeying their authority. Their only goal is to make more little Team BLUE fellators; see the article from yesterday about Denver schools actively teaching “social justice.” That shit’s just pure evil.

    4. You misspelled “Police Unions” there bud.

      1. I blame the teachers’ unions for that, though.

    5. No, cops and paracops are the worst. But teachers are the second worst. And in both cases, they’re filled up (though not nearly so universally in the case of teachers) with power-tripping assholes who get off on the notion that the government granting them authority over other people makes them superior to those people.

  18. Leadership? not now
    Frittering away Mideast victory

    Having won in Afghanistan and Iraq on the strength of its peerless military, which dismantled the Taliban in a matter of months and ? after considerable blood and treasure ? toppled Saddam Hussein and destroyed al-Qaeda in Iraq, America now faces a humiliating strategic defeat in its global struggle against Islamic radicalism.

  19. Rove: The President’s Fountain of Youth Is Drying Up
    In 2008 young voters chose Obama over McCain by 66% to 32%. Today he leads Romney by 49% to 41%.

    The July poll by Generation Opportunity reported that 84% of young Americans are delaying important decisions or feel their plans are in jeopardy. More than a third?38%?are delaying finding their own place. Some 31% said they are delaying starting a family, and 23% said they are delaying getting married. Dangerously for the president, 76% believe the lack of job opportunities?not the lack of government?is shrinking the middle class.

    On every front, Mr. Obama is on the defensive, fighting to keep states and voter groups in his winning coalition. He can absorb some erosion from his 2008 totals, but not much. Right now the signs are ominous for him.

    1. If you take away the youth vote advantage and you get even an average black turnout versus the historic one in 08, most of Obama’s vote lead is gone.

    2. The young voters of today werent voting 4 years ago, its a different group of voters.

      Its still a significant change, but I bet he is doing better with the 22-25 group than 18-21.

  20. Education, Chicago-style: Parents are prepping for a walk-out by public-school teachers.

    I can’t believe that union-hating Rahm Emanuel would be allowed to speak at the DNC. He’s like more corrupt Scott Walker.

    1. So, it’s the Tila Tequila of Instagram?

    2. geoblocked, dammit. Or should I be grateful?

  21. We’re so doomed. I may need to stop looking at new-sy information till the election’s over.

    OTOH, if I watch TV news, I’ll smash so many flatscreens that my replacement purchases may singlehandedly bring the economy roaring back to life, so I have to think about that. Civic duty and all that.

    We are so doomed.

    1. Only if those TeeVees are built with good ol’ shoddy ‘Murrican union labor.

      1. That was Curtis Mathis TV’s claim to fame back in the day!

        “More expensive and with fewer features, but made in the USofA with good, old fashioned, shoddy US labor!”

        Course, they went outta bidness. No one could foresee that happening.

        1. If only they were TOO BIG TO FAIIIIIIIIIIL!!!!

        2. I seem to recall they touted their absurdly long warranty, as well.

  22. It amazes me what amateurs the Obama people are The Jerusalem and God debacles were totally unforced errors. Israel has owned Jerusalem since 1967. But no US President has actually moved the embassy there because all hell would break lose. But they always promise to and Jews and Israel supporters appreciate the gesture and live with the fact that it is not really going to mean anything. It is one of those cheap symbolic moves that gets you votes.

    As far as God goes, most atheist are reliably socialist and will be voting Obama no matter what. The rest are mostly the odd Objectivist or Libertarian and probably won’t vote for either party. Basically leaving God out gets you no votes but thoroughly pisses off Catholics and Jews. What a bunch of maroons.

    1. It’s even funnier that after they caught their mistake and tried to change the platform back, they decided to do it by cheating on a televised voice vote.

      So they managed to compound their initial error by undertaking blatant procedural dishonesty right in front of cameras.

      1. So GOP==Dems

        Good to know.

      2. Difference between Obama and Clinton. Clinton was a master at getting the nuts to keep a low profile during the election. Obama seems to encourage the nuts

        1. When you are one of the nuts, it gets harder to recognize the others, especially if they’re running your campaign or serving on your cabinet.

        2. The nuts polarize things. When things are polarized, people unite around their leaders against the hated, terrifying enemy, even if those leaders are actually pretty shit. Fascism 101.

    2. most atheist are reliably socialist and will be voting Obama no matter what.

      It’s amazing how bad you are at reading my mind.

      1. Most doesn’t mean all.

  23. Every night, Julie Parson Nesbitt sits at her son’s bedside and reads him the story of 17-year-old Annie Shapiro, who led 40,000 clothing workers on strike in Chicago in 1910.

    Every night? That’s child abuse, straight up.

    1. Jesus. My kids wouldn’t settle for anything less than “Go Dog, Go!” BEST childrens book, EVAR.

      1. Unrealistic. What dog can climb a tree?

        1. “Blue dogs and red dogs and yellow dogs and green dogs and big dogs and little dogs…”

          1. That was, in fact, awesome.

          2. Did you know dogs and mountain goats were the same species? True story. I think Pro L. told me.

            1. My plot to end the distinction among species is on schedule.

      2. Fuck yeah. Taught myself to read with that shit.

    2. And of course those clothing workers and our current teachers are facing the exact same working conditions. You know . . . those clothing workers had months off with no work during summers, 6-7 hour work days, freedom from the worry getting fired, and good pay with full benefits and pensions.

      1. It was like the paradise that only the Greeks and French deserve.

      2. I saw a movie once where teachers were stuck inside a high school with the doors chained, just like that famous garment factory fire that killed all those workers.

        1. Triangle Shirtwaist High School, I think it was.

    3. Some day, my kid is going to loot Julie’s son’s pension.

  24. http://www.fox16.com/news/loca…..wLNrg.cspx

    Remember vote fraud is a myth. And it is bi partisan so it doesn’t matter. But oddly, I cant’ think of a single time anyone but a Democrat has been convicted of it.

    1. Lefties are liars. Haven’t you figured that out yet?
      They rarely if ever engage in honest debate. They cheerfully put forth things that they know to be untrue, and stick to their lies even when they are caught.

      Their claiming that voter fraud is a non-problem that doesn’t need fixing is no surprise, given that it is something that they willfully engage in.

      Of course they don’t want anything to be done about voter fraud. Why would they want to eliminate a tool that they use to win elections?

      1. This reads like the character synopsis of generic Rand villains.

        1. Sandra Fluke sounds the brutally unsubtle name of a generic Rand villain. I think the most likely explanation is that we’re living in a Rand novel or a Rand inspired novel, though that could also imply a deconstruction. Libertarians are more genre savvy than most, but Rand didn’t like us much either.

      2. evidently quite a few judges dont buy the voter fraud meme either

    2. Actually, Matty Yglesias made a funny about this on twitter yesterday after Villaraigosa’s hamhanding of the God/Jerusalem amendment. Something about it’s better to conduct your fraud on the counting side than the voting side. So at least Matty is willing to admit the possibility of fraud.

  25. http://www.guardian.co.uk/comm…..?fb=optOut

    Actual British feminist excoriates fake American feminist. And NEUROSCIENCE.

    1. When the feminist writer noticed that sex had become less enjoyable, it sent her on an unexpected journey of discovery of her own body and how sexist language can wreck women’s lives

      Oh my fucking GOD.


      2. it sent her on an unexpected journey of discovery of her own body

        So, she started masturbating at 40? That’s my takeaway from this.

        1. I don’t think so. Such a dangerous enterprise requires a proper group of explorers, native bearers, etc. And government funding, naturally. Imagine what she would find with her own Lewis, Clark, and Sacagawea leading the way

          1. Ah, so at 40 she unleashed her inner slut and got gang-banged. Thanks for clearing that up for me, IFH.

          2. Watch out for the man-sized cave bats.

          3. Lewis and Clark are clearly the hands… what part of a woman is secretly a lesbian?

    2. Well, no one will take her seriously because she used the word ‘cunt’.

  26. Matrix director becomes a woman. A dodgy new haircut suggests why the sequels sucked so much. Also has intriguing private life:

    She is also married to her second wife having gone through a bitter divorce with college sweetheart Thea Bloom who she left in 2003 for a blonde dominatrix called Ilsa Strix.



      1. A dodgy new haircut suggests…

        Probably indicates some character flaw, but the first thing I thought upon seeing the pic was, “Honey, get yourself to a professional stylist, stat!”

        1. She might want to drop Harvey Firestein as a voice coach too.

    2. Well. Anybody else want to puke a little bit? Just a little though.

    3. Does being a tranny prevent you from thinking of a coherent plot?

      1. No, but being a lucky hack does.

    4. Someone took the joke about being a lesbian trapped in a man’s body too seriously.

  27. Education, Chicago-style: Parents are prepping for a walk-out by public-school teachers.

    Why don’t the students walk-out? Why don’t the parents go on strike and stop paying for the schools? Oh yeah, because they’ll be arrested if they do.

  28. British parents demand action, but there ain’t no cure for stupidity:

    Parents are furious after being hoodwinked by copycat titles and packaging into buying inferior alternatives to top Disney DVDs and family movies.

    Instead of enjoying the fun and thrills of animated blockbusters such as Brave, Tangled, The Pirates! and Happy Feet, families have found themselves watching Braver, Tangled Up, Pirates and Tappy Feet.


    1. Haha I remember the Scamper movies from when I was younger. Parents are so stupid, though. I could understand it if they were buying it out of a RedBox or something similar, but it’s not like they’re opening the DVD case and a completely different movie is in there.

    2. In Africa I see this a lot, the ‘mockbusters’ are put out as for real because no one can read for crap over here and the pictures and fonts are the same. So instead of pirated versions of Abe Lincoln: Vampire Hunter and Battleship, they wind up with semi-legit versions (ripped, but not filmed in a theater) of Abe Lincoln vs. Zombies, and American Warships.

      I don’t think anyone here cares that much though.

    3. Those show up in Redbox frequently. I notice, and snicker everytime, imagining the reaction of the stupid parents that didn’t know, or notice the difference.

  29. A bit of an older story, but it’s local for me: Driver shot after she aimed SUV at women, cop at Roxy

    At least three OPD officers were working at the club Tuesday night during its “Takeovr Female Free-4-All,” an event offering free drinks for women 21 and older until midnight.

    Where are the liberals to decry the CORPORASHUNZ! who promote such discriminatory policies as “Ladies’ Night”?

    1. The women like the free drinks and the men like the women who drink too many free drinks. What’s the problem again?

      1. I don’t have a problem with it, but discrimination or something. As long as there are places that charge no cover and drunk girls exiting the bars around here at 1:30 – 2:00 AM (Orlando closes early in my opinion) I don’t have a problem.

    1. This is what comes of tea bagging ratfuckers. Hope you’re happy, ‘murca!!

    2. Plague’s always around, it’s just that most people don’t come much into contact with rat fleas. Back in the late 80s, my regiment sent some guys into one of the smaller California bases to do testing on some new whizbang piece of equipment. 6 of them got the plague from flea bites. So we all got the plague vaccine.

      So there’s one less form of apocalypse I have to worry about, I suppose.

      1. Prairie dogs are the most common carriers. Usually it’s a rancher getting it from his dog who has killed one, gotten its fleas, etc.

  30. Judging by the Jezebe reaction, Fluke should tithe 1/10 of her income to Rush in perpetuity.

    Also, if you refuse to read Jezebel(as do many here who do not find retard soup filling or tasty-why?), imagine the female version of bukake on Fluke, and you will have the comments.

    1. imagine the female version of bukake on Fluke, and you will have the comments.

      So they are for her, or against her? I feel like it could go either way in a bukkake reference.

    2. I’ve seen enough of Cytherea to know that female bukkake is possible.

      1. I feel ashamed it took me this long to come up this:

        imagine the female version of bukake on Fluke,

        Flukkake, if you will. TO URBAN DICTIONARY.

        1. Don’t worry. Like your parents, we are ALL disappointed in you.

    3. Somebody put this Jezebelian out of his misery:

      As a man raised by a feminist mother I stood up off the couch and applauded her. Also, as a man, I find her incredibly attractive, hot even, I love a powerful, well-spoken women!

      1. So I imagine that if he were to run across a “powerful, well-spoken” woman who was actually accomplished yet abhorred the idea of forcing people to pay for other people’s birth control, he’d find her hot too, right?

        1. Ha ha.

          Jezebelian man fawns over the stupidest politics because he thinks it will get him laid.

          1. Welp, judging by the number of comments on any breastfeeding thread, Jezebellians do somehow breed. Don’t wanna know with who, with what, or how, and I suspect it is the leading cause of male rape, but it somehow happens.

            1. Don’t wanna know with who, with what, or how,

              Somehow, Cthulhu is involved.

              1. Is tentacle hentai overrepresented at that site?

            2. Specimen cup and a turkey baster.

      2. As a man who doesn’t get (or want) to have sex with her, I find her incredibly unattractive, repugnant even, I hate busy-body, fascistic 30 year-old women who can’t pay for their own fucking birth control.

      3. Sub male looking for domme.

        1. Exactly. He finally gets to break in that new strap-on.

      4. Fluke or his mom or both?

  31. Am I crazy in thinking Fallout New Vegas is better than Fallout 3?

    1. I preferred NV as well, if only because I was able to join a gang of Elvis impersonators.

    2. Sorry GoldWater, but Fallout 3 just worked better for me. Also, I think the Fallout engine was starting to show it’s age when NV came out. Regardless, both good games.

    3. Aim down sights and Hardcore mode are the two superior aspects for me. But I prefer the DC wastelands myself.

      1. Half of DC and surrounding areas already look like the wasteland. The Metro definitely smells like a wasteland.

        1. ^^This! It took some imagination to turn Vegas and the Mojave into a wasteland. With DC, it only takes pictures.

  32. imagine the female version of bukake on Fluke

    See, now you’re just trying to get us to check it out.

    1. Ach, this was in response to Goldwater above. Fuggin squirrels…

  33. Skwerlz loom large

    1. Good crappy band name.

      1. Nah, band album. Loom Large, the new album from Skwerlz.

  34. Once again, police arrest man where the underlying behavior is legal if weird:


    dunphy is fond of citing Oregon’s law on nudity, perfectly legal as long as the person isn’t doing it for the purposes of sexual gratification. This is how it actual turns out. Just like with open carry.

    1. In dunphy’s defense, he almost exclusively cites Washington’s laws. You may be confusing him talking about Oregon from when he was there helping Phil Knight found Nike. Or was he once Governor of Oregon? I can’t remember. Hell, it was probably both.

      1. He stepped on Bill Bowerman’s waffle iron?

        No, it’s Oregon nudity he cites:

        Not the first time either.



    LITTLE ROCK, Ark. (AP) – A Democratic state legislator from east Arkansas, his father and two campaign workers pleaded guilty Wednesday to conspiracy to commit election fraud after federal prosecutors said the lawmaker’s campaign bribed absentee voters and destroyed ballots in a special election last year.

    Prosecutors said Democratic Rep. Hudson Hallum of Marion, Kent Hallum, Phillip Wayne Carter and Sam Malone acknowledged that they participated in a conspiracy to bribe voters to influence absentee votes in the Arkansas District 54 primary, runoff and general elections in 2011. The four were released pending a sentencing hearing.


    1. This fraud wouldn’t have been stopped because of voter ID laws so it doesn’t exist.

    2. But…

      Eight North Dakota State University football players, including four starters, will remain on the roster while criminal charges against them for forging signatures on ballot initiative petitions are resolved, their coach said Tuesday.

      The players were paid $9 an hour to gather signatures for two citizen initiatives, which sought to set up a state conservation fund and make marijuana legal for medical treatments. Attorney General Wayne Stenehjem said many of the petition signatures were copied from phone books or fabricated.

      North Dakota Secretary of State Al Jaeger said the alleged fraud made both initiatives ineligible for a statewide vote in November.

      Stenehjem said 11 people have been charged in the case, including the eight players for the defending Football Championship Subdivision champions.


  36. New Professionalism indeed!

    FTA: Police spokesman Howie Padilla said police learned of the video after someone sent a link to the department. Chief Thomas Smith ordered an internal investigation of conduct before, during and after the arrest.

    Yeah, I wonder why they didn’t learn of the abuse from one of the other officers on the scene…you know, the people charged with upholding the law (unless one of their own is breaking it, I guess).

    “The video of a St. Paul police officer striking a suspect raises serious questions about the conduct of the officer,” Mayor Chris Coleman said in a statement. “I have high expectations for the department and its employees. We will fully investigate and take appropriate action.”

    It should also raise questions about officers that would idly stand by and watch one of their fellow boys in blue physically assault and batter another human being under color of the law.

    While several officers appear in the video, Zilge was the only one placed on paid administrative leave.

    Of course. Any other person found to be assaulting a person on video that could be identified would get their boss called and given a vacation, right?

  37. Well, they don’t claim to be firearms experts.

    Department uncovers cop’s lie days after the incident. They let the innocent man sit in jail for four months before dropping charges. The officer was not charged with any crime for six months and was given desk duty according to another account. And he was also not arrested but was issued a summons for the charges of misconduct, second-degree assault and reckless endangerment.

    FT(WaPo)A: “This is an officer with a good reputation who was operating in good faith in trying to address what appeared to be a potential crime, and it’s unfortunate that he was indicted for doing his job,” Bonsib said. “We’re confident that when all the facts are known that he’ll be found not guilty.”

    Yeah, this idiot cop and his lawyer need to learn what the Constitution means and also what the definition of “indict” is.

    Seriously, people. This one is gonna cause a few of you to break your monitors, so enter at your own risk.

    1. Sentences are handed out pre-adjudication, right?

      1. They are when bails are set so high people can sit for months in jail awaiting their day in court because a prosecutor and judge think they need to be taught a lesson.

        I hope this guy ends up with $20M in taxpayer dollars just to get people to finally question why their hard-earned dollars are going to pay for criminal behavior at the hands of law enforcement officers.

        1. He should have just pled out.

          /the “justice” system

          1. Today’s cops give suspects a choice: “You can either plead out or I can make you bleed out.”

  38. Motherfucking soulless, heartless, dickless, brainless pig.

    FTA: The Spartanburg County Sheriff’s Office announced Thursday that it would not be pursuing disciplinary action against a deputy who fatally shot a tethered dog earlier this week.

    The dog was tethered to a tree, there was a “beware of Dog” sign that the cop parked in front of. The cop was beyond the tether’s length. And to top it off? They were serving a child support warrant on a man that didn’t live there (the current resident had lived there over 5 years and had never heard of the man in question).

    1. If cops don’t shoot these dogs, then is is only a matter of time before a cop gets licked on the face. Is that what you you want sloop, IS THAT WHAT YOU WANT???!!

    2. “Yes, it’s true. This man has no dick.”

      Seriously though, what do cops have against dogs?

  39. Video: Cop pistol whips a man and his gun goes off

    Officer claims he thought a robbery was going to happen at a gas station. so he follows the man as he was walking away down the street and pistol whips him in the head. He claims the man tried to grab the gun from him, which caused it to discharge. This guy sat in jail for 4 months for a crime that NEVER HAPPENED!

    Seriously… this cop needs to be pistol whipped repeatedly.

  40. Dude is talking a whole lot of smack dude.


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