Scandinavia Sucked Into the Euro Mess, More Troops for the Olympics, Foie Gras Forever: P.M. Links


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  1. No one expects the American job claims numbers!

    1. I am shocked I tell you. Shocked!

    2. It just happened man. No one could do anything to stop it.

    3. Our chief weapon is lying. Lying and underestimating. Our TWO chief weapons are lying, underestimating, and overestimating. Our THREE chief weapons are lying, underestimating, overestimating, and…I’ll come in again.

      1. “Okay boys – give her… the COMFY UNEMPLOYMENT CHECK!”

      2. Our FOUR chief weapons are lying, underestimating, overestimating, and . . . overspending.

  2. That’s earlier than was thought possible, but apparently occurred because of unique circumstances.

    Government infrastructure facilitated it?

    1. The Universe didn’t build that.

    2. because of unique circumstances.

      They think there is something that unique in the universe? If we’ve found one 10 billion year old galaxy, we’ll find many.

      1. Are you telling me the science isn’t settled?

        1. Listen, all the models predict there being no galaxies that old, so that’s the truth. No need to search more than the tiny percentage of the universe than we have.

  3. Sad to hear Fred Willard doesn’t have internet.

    1. Like a grip it and rip it is as exciting sitting at your computer desk.

  4. The responsible socialists might have to pay for the irresponsible socialists?

    Which side am I supposed to be on?

  5. Fucking hipsters. Bike in theater and 80s movies? Die, hipsters.

    1. The bike thing is stupid, but what the fuck is wrong with 80s movies?

      1. They are not as good as 70s movies?

        1. There are great movies in any decade. What a stupid generalization.

          1. Sure there are. But there were more good movies in the 70s.

          2. Mannequin? Go ahead, quote from it. I dare you.

            1. “Don’t let Felix get to you, he’s just got a bad case of Miami Vice.”

              1. I’ve just exposed you for the blight that you are.

                1. I’ve hurt you. And I wish to go on hurting you.

                  1. There’s no way I’m getting sucked into anotFROM HELL’S HEART I STAB AT THEE.

                    1. THIS IS THE PM LINKS!!!

      2. There are some terrific movies from the 80’s.

        1. If you look at it as a comedy, Less Than Zero is a hoot.

        2. Repo Man and Evil Dead 2

      3. Its not like they’re going to be showing fucking Red Dawn. C’mon now. Its gonna be shit that 28 year old hipsters remember liking.

        1. Mainly Brat pack films?

          1. Still probably too “mainstream”. I’m thinking Dirty Dancing or Road House. Or maybe something without Swayze in it. I’m just trying to be consistent.

            1. Stand by Me? The Goonies?

              1. Real Genius? The Sure Thing?

                1. Damn you for making this sound better and better. Although, come to think of it, Say Anything… is probably the perfect movie for this.

                  1. Back to the Future? Blue Velvet? Scarface? Ghostbusters?

                2. Say Anything?
                  Ferris Bueller Day’s Off?

                3. Real Genius. That. I was just checking that someone mentioned it.

            2. Weird Science?

              Nailed it

              1. Dragonslayer
                Clash of the Titans (non-suck original version)
                Personal Best
                The Name of the Rose

                … all movies that has exposed breasts in them, might I add, for the titillation of those of us who were adolescent at the time.

                1. Is Personal Best the movie where Brad Pitt goes from being a badass runner to a strung out junkie?

                  1. No. It is the movie where one of the Hemingway sisters is a track star and goes lesbian with her coach.

                    1. Let me just update my Netflix queue.

            3. I predict anything with Ally Sheedy in it. Starting with Short Circuit.

            4. Better Off Dead.

              Which an outstanding film, and should never be considered by hipsters unless they take the title personally.

              1. Agree, this was awesome. Also, predator.

                (Also, fried chicken).

                1. Fucking a, like none of these are on Netflix Instant. Or Amazon Instant (for free). Waah.

            5. Can I borrow your towel, my car just hit a water buffalo.

            6. Labyrinth. Nuff said

        2. Your hipster hate is making you stupid. Most of the movies people will remember liking are generally good ones. I mean, I’ve seen The Breakfast Club 50 times but it’s still a good, enjoyable movie.

          1. There’s nothing wrong with The Breakfast Club. I don’t think they’ll show that, however.

            1. There’s nothing wrong with The Breakfast Club.

              Two words: Molly Ringwald.

          2. The Breakfast Club?! The whole teen angst bullshit themes? The jock is driven by his father, the “cool” guy is abused by his father and has easy access to drugs, the spoiled “pretty” girl eventually falls for the “cool” guy.

            Nothing wrong with the Breakfast Club? Nothing except for everything.

            1. We’ll get off your lawn in a minute, Marshall.

              1. No, he’s right–Breakfast Club is retarded. It’s basically two hours of FUCK YOU DAD.

        3. Teen Wolf!

          1. Yes! This. This is what they will show and it will validate everything I believe about them.

            1. Dude, Teen Wolf rocks. I just rewatched it recently and it’s fun as hell.

              1. Disagree. But that’s okay. It doesn’t make you a hipster.

                1. Being a hipster makes him a hipster.

              2. Risky Business

                1. And, of course…The Terminator.

                  1. Best of the Best

                    1. ^This. Far better than The Karate Kid and actually succeeded in making Eric Roberts almost badass.

            2. Die Hard. Best movie of all time. Thank you, and good night.

      4. Thief, To Live and Die in L.A., Manhunter, The Osterman Weekend, Birdy. There are plenty of good 80s movies.

        1. To Live and Die in L.A., Manhunter

          2 of the best 80s flicks.

          1. Apparently SIV is William Peterson’s handle.

            1. It’s his best work by far. Also Friedkin and Mann’s. 80s noir-y policiers just work.

      5. There were lots of good movies from the 80s, but I doubt they’ll be showing any of them. They’ll probably show really shitty movies to be “ironic” (I don’t think that word means what they think it means) or some shit.

        So they’ll show crap like Ishtar, Crush Groove, and Purple Rain.

        1. Episiarch? Please come down here and kick this one into a well for uttering the dread movie name That Man Is Not Supposed To Say (I$htar).

        2. The Last Dragon

  6. That’s earlier than was thought possible, but apparently occurred because of unique circumstances.

    God did it. Where is your precious science now?

  7. I ran across this earlier today and it amused me so much I thought I’d share.

    1. C’mon, that’s not really Danzig, that’s just Warty.

      1. Not enough facial hair.

    2. Carl: What did you say your name was again?

      Glenn Danzig: Danzig, motherfucker! I got a question: can you make the blood flow up the walls?

      Carl: Lemme go talk to my blood guy over here.

      Cybernetic Ghost: I don’t see why not.

      Carl: That’s elf blood, too. That ain’t cheap–

      Glenn Danzig: How much you want?

      Carl: Oh, I dunno…a million?

      Glenn Danzig: Killer. Draft the check tomorrow.

      Carl: You’re serio–THANK YOU GOD!!!

      1. That guy, he is so annoying, he is so frightning and he doesn’t wear a shirt.

        1. You make our house bleed right now!

          1. Careful epi, according to dunphy, this makes us the same as team be ruled.

  8. Do not get it.

    1. In regards to T’s post.

      1. Glenn Danzig carrying a big box of kitty litter is just hilarious to me. YMMV, of course.

        1. Seeing how I had to google just to see who Danzig was…

          1. Keep talking like that and Warty will rape you faster than STEVE SMITH.

            1. Finally some references I can get!

        2. Glenn Danzig carrying a big box of kitty litter is just hilarious to me. YMMV, of course.

          Combined with this

  9. Ray was arrested in July 2010 on drug possession charges and taken to the Chatham County jail.

    This is the biggest reason law enforcement lobbies for continuing the drug war. They like the endless supply of subjects.

    1. Better be careful. Dunphy will come in here and call you a bigot.

      1. Stop saying the name!!!! Its like an H.P. Lovecraft story around here – summoning forth dread things by naming them aloud.

  10. Bay Aryans propose GPS trackers on all cars for a use tax. And, you know, whatever other forms of control and intimidation they can assert.

    1. “Bay Aryans”?

      Uh. What about the Bay Non-Aryans?

      1. Bay Aryans, the Nanny nazis who just want you to conform for your own good. People who seem wildly “progressive” by Northern Cali standards.

      2. Who cares about Oakland.

    2. A dime per mile is no joke of a tax increase.

      1. No kidding. On the standard 12,000 miles/year, that’s $1200 dollars a year. $100/month.

        1. You are very good at math 😉

  11. Britain will deploy an extra 1,200 troops for the 2012 London Olymic games…

    Hopefully they can drive cabs and run trains.

    1. and the Brits expect to do quite well in the dog shooting event.

      1. Nah – their Army had to freakin’ account for every bullet they had in Iraq (at least in 2008)…if they came up short, they had to pay. I wasn’t sure wether to laugh or cry, so I “acquired” a whole bunch of 5.56mm and gave it to the Pipe Major of the Scots Dragoon Guards and told him to make sure none of the Jocks got dinged for a @#$%ing bullet. Jesus wept. I bet they make these guys run around with f’ing Claymores or half-pikes.

        1. Seriously?

          After the Gulf War, we just dumped all our ammo in a barrel and handed it over. Same with the grenades.

  12. California restaurants happily find ways around the state’s new foie gras ban, by selling it on federal property


    1. Progressive: It’s not supposed to work that way.

      1. It’s not supposed to work that way they’re supposed to know that we love them
        But it don’t matter anyway if we can’t be there to control them
        And like the other little children you gotta dream a dream or two
        But be careful what you’re dreamin’ or soon your dreams’ll be dreamin’ you
        It’s not supposed to work that way you’re supposed to know that we love them

        But it don’t matter anyway if we can’t be there to control them
        And when they go out to play this evening play with foix gras till its gone
        Then you rush to meet their betters and say their sorry until the dawn

  13. My son is changing gender. How do I help his family?

    My fortysomething son split with his second wife 18 months ago because of gender-identity issues. He wants to become a woman and dresses accordingly. I think my son is courageous, but I would like advice on how our family ? especially his teenaged son and preschool-aged daughter ? can deal with the change.…..le4428041/

    1. You have to feel a moment of pity for anybody whose head is that profoundly messed up.

      After the moment passes, feel free to point and laugh, of course.

      1. I can’t help but notice that trans-supporters claim that since many trans have brains more similar to the opposite gender it proves they are right about “actually being a man.” No, that means the basis of their delusion is that their brain is messed up.

    2. “I think my son is courageous, but I would like advice on how our family ? especially his teenaged son and preschool-aged daughter ? can deal with the change.”

      Tell the kids that their father is dead – died while trying to save a puppy from drowning or something. And say that the ugly woman in the ill-fitting dress is a stranger. Trust me, you will be doing them a favor.


    CNN puts dots over breasts of a woman in a Matisse painting.

    1. I saw that this morning but wondered if it was a lack of caffeine. Good night; we are the most prudish and confused society. Madonna’s nipple slip is front page news but a master’s painting is damn near pornography.

  15. Anyone else seeing Dark Knight Rises tonight?

    1. Yeah midnight tickets in Florida. Spoilers to come in tomorrow’s AM links. muwahahahaha

      1. Batman dies. There’s yer spoiler.

        1. I was hoping I ruled out a Batman death when I read that Nolan remains firmly committed to this being his last Batman movie…As if to say, it might still be possible for there to be a fourth movie in the present continuity.

          But if they manage to kill Maggie Gyllenhaal a second time, I’ll be fine with that.

        2. I’m actually even mildly annoyed to know that Bane is in it.

        3. There’s yer spoiler.


    2. Nope. Gonna wait a year and see it on cable.

      1. Who would want to see a movie in a theater filled with Batman fan boys?

        1. Someone who wants to see one the most anticipated movies of the year as soon as possible?

          Also, I’ll be going to Somerville theater so it will be filled with hipster who will claim that they’re only there ironically.

          1. IN other words, another Batman fan boy.

            1. Hopefully, the constant self conscience feeling will cause them to keep their damn traps shut.

              God, I hate an active audience.

              1. God, I hate an active audience.

                That’s the part that sucks about midnight premieres.

                1. I thought the part that sucked and/or is just insanely stupid was waiting in line for three hours?

                  1. That’s the part that sucked back in the 90s. Now you just buy tickets online.

    3. I’ve a few reviews. Seems to be trending as somewhere between Batman Begins and The Dark Knight in terms of quality. I’ll be seeing it.

      There’s talk of an immediate reboot happening, but I’d rather wait another 8 years before that happens, so I’ll get fill of this movie and sit back and take a rest from comic book movies for a while.

      1. Superman says no you won’t.

        1. To tell the truth, I kinda liked Superman Returns. It might not have been what DC/Warner Bros. or audiences were expecting, but it was good enough.

          DC has got themselves in a bind trying to get things coordinated for a film adaptation of Justice League, but after rebooting Superman and the failure of Green Lantern, it seems that they’ll have to start from square one to get things finalized.

          On a related note: Will there be a Man of Steel teaser attached to The Dark Knight Rises?

    4. Anyone else seeing Dark Knight Rises tonight?

      I think Fred Willard was watching it when he got busted.

  16. Ecumenical news:

    Protestant Wheaton College joins Catholic University of American in challenging the contraceptive mandate:….._opinion_0

    Romney says “I feel that we’re all Catholics today.”…..lic-today/

    1. I see what Romney did there.

  17. A spiral galaxy formed just three billion years after the Big Bang, scientists discovered. That’s earlier than was thought possible, but apparently occurred because of unique circumstances.

    Geez, where’s the editor when we need him? The first sentence is passable, but definitely channels Yoda. The second sentence is a run-on with a fragment. C’mon JD; step yo game up!

    1. Cut me some slack. I’m running a fever!

      1. No slack in the comments section!

  18. Lizzie Warren didn’t get the message that Obama didn’t really mean government was responsible for your success.

    Warren said during a campaign stop in Dorchester yesterday, “I think the basic notion is right. Nobody got rich on their own. Nobody. People worked hard, they build a business, God bless, but they moved their goods on roads the rest of us helped build, they hired employees the rest of us helped educate, they plugged into a power grid the rest of us helped build,” she said.…..-election/

    Obama didn’t meant hat. Crazy fucking tea bagger.

    1. I like the way it’s Warren’s fault for agreeing with what Obama actually meant.

      1. of course, had I read the article first, it would have been clear that the ‘thank you’ was meant in a much different way.

      2. This shit makes my blood boil so much.

        Hey we stole your money and did some stuff with it, so therefore you have to give half of everything you make to the government.

        Fuck off slaver.

    2. Not to support Scott Brown or anything, but holy shit this woman can not be allowed to win elected office.

      1. What are you, anti-Native American?

      2. I don’t care if Brown is Lenin himself. I so want that smug bitch to lose. I care more about that election than I do about the Presidential election.

      3. But if she wins an elected office she’ll be qualified for Veep, or something.

    3. they moved their goods on roads the rest of us helped build, they hired employees the rest of us helped educate, they plugged into a power grid the rest of us helped build,” she said.

      Perhaps someone should out to Fauxcohontas that business owners pay taxes too.

      1. *point out to…

    4. Really? I never really pictured Lizzie as doing construction or engineering, but you learn something new every day.

      1. Anyway, couldn’t this same logic be used by capitalists to tell workers to fuck off with their whining?

        “Hey, guy, I know you work hard, but lots of people work hard. I know you’re smart, but lots of people are smart. You couldn’t work hard without the factory I built, you couldn’t apply your intelligence without the tools I bought and the other people I brought together to work with you. So please stop whining at me just because I cut your pay 25% so I could afford to buy a new yacht, bribe the board of directors into letting me keep looting the shareholders, and send my wife on five or six lavish vacations on the company dime. Back to work, asshole.”

  19. Behold the 2013 Ford PintoEscape

    Ford Motor Co. is telling owners of one version of the brand-new Ford Escape not to drive the SUVs until dealers can fix fuel lines that can crack and spill gasoline, causing engine fires.

    1. idiots. if the fire is unexplained, it’s a matter for the courts.

    2. “I should have warned you; that clock gets incredibly hot if you leave it plugged in.”

      1. “Where’s the will, Barry? I don’t know what I’m saying!”

        “It’s in my office, on my desk, next to the hot plate with the frayed wires…”

    3. So…Kentucky Fried Movie remake, coming soon to a theater near you?

      1. Also, Top Secret.

  20. Ann Romney uses the phrase “you people” in an interview, Twitter explodes. I expect a counter-meme to the Obama “you didn’t build that” meme that shows Ann Romney as a Marie Antoinette to pop up soon.

    1. Yeah because having a national conversation about rich out of touch Presidential spouses is going to go real well for Obama.

      1. When are the Obamas sending their kids to public school?

    2. Perot had a similar dustup way back when. The church of the aggrieved and offended never closes.

  21. Woo look what popped up in my INBOX

    JOURNEY is returning to the road on July 21 for their 2012 tour kick-off in San Bernardino, California at the San Manuel Amphitheatre with concert dates through December. Special guests Loverboy and Night Ranger will appear on most tour dates in Canada. Tickets for the Canadian dates are on sale Friday, July 20th at 10am.

    1. Didn’t they finally make back up with their lead singer? For many years they toured with a stand in.

      1. Nope, it’s still this guy

        1. Then what is the point of seeing them/

          1. I mainly wanna see Loverboy

            1. Will he perform Pig and Elephant DNA Just Won’t Splice?

          2. Because I, for one, am working for the weekend.

          3. The guy is Perry’s hand voice twin. It’s uncanny.

            Anyone more than 20 rows back wouldn’t be able to tell it’s not the real guy.

          4. Actually, the little Asian dude is a dead ringer for Steve Perry. You would never know you aren’t listening to him.

    2. Don’t stop believing, bro.


  22. Canada’s got killer weed at low prices too, eh!

    1. You can have all of our crabgrass that you want. Free. Just cut it down yourself.

  23. SBU Study Reveals Harmful Effects of CFL Bulbs to Skin

    Results revealed significant levels of UVC and UVA, which appeared to originate from cracks in the phosphor coatings, present in all CFL bulbs studied.

    1. The answer is no more light bulbs.

    2. It is your job to die young for the sake of efficiency.

      1. It is your job to die young for the sake of efficiency Gaia.

        (I don’t consider something that requires continuous operation for 6-7* years to pay off and requires special, expensive handling when disposed to be particularly “efficient”)

        * Number pulled from my ass, but I’m sure the real number is probably even more ridiculous.

    3. Re: rts,

      If you’re against CFL’s, then you’re against saving the planet while being an anti-science, toothless hoakie. Tony dixit.

      1. Oh, I’m not against CFLs per se, but rather the mandates and bans in place in various jurisdictions.

        1. Re: rts,

          Oh, I’m not against CFLs per se

          In this supersensitive world, just mentioning any sort of problem that ails the favorite industry of the watermellons makes you an anti-science, toothless hoakie. It is unavoidable, no matter how sincere or truthful your defense.

    4. So, if I have a CFL just sitting out in the open, instead of inside a glass fixture or behind a lampshade, I might be exposed to a cancer risk similar to that of sun exposure, but smaller?

      Uh… ok.

      1. I’m guessing you’re not very pale. This is kind of a big deal for the melanin challenged among us.

  24. So the people staffing London’s transportational infrastructure are planning a shitload of strikes and ordered walkouts during the Olympic period.

    This is proof that monopolized, government-run transporational infrastructure is the best transportational infrastructure ever. EVER.

  25. “Gary Johnson is polling at 13 percent in New Mexico, maintaining his double digit numbers and pulling about equally from voters who would support Obama or Romney in a two-way matchup.”

    What jackasses would support O or R in a 2way? Don’t they know they could not vote?

  26. I just caught myself staring at the worst cleavage ever. I feel like I’ve violated myself.

    1. worst cleavage

      These two words do not compute.

      1. I’m thinking Kiera Knightly in the first Pirates of the Caribbean where they had to paint it on.

      2. Think acne scars and female chest hair.

        1. I hope you didn’t try to pet the cat on her lap.

          1. It was a marmoset not a cat.

  27. A spiral galaxy formed just three billion years after the Big Bang, scientists discovered. That’s earlier than was thought possible[…]

    It hides its age well.

    California restaurants happily find ways around the state’s new foie gras ban, by […] just ignoring the stupid law.

    Maybe if they bring Al Armendariz and crucify a few of those criminal restauranteurs, the rest would then comply…

    Britain will deploy an extra 1,200 troops for the 2012 London Olymic games […] after a private security contractor failed to recruit enough guards for the event.

    Only trained troops can withstand boredom with a stiff upper lip…

  28. Sometimes you jsut have to jump up in the air and shout, Whos your Daddy!

    1. That’s the ticket, Anon-bot.

  29. Where’s Barfman?…..-u-s-.html

    1. “Social programs and robust capitalism are not, as so many would have you believe, inherently opposed propositions. Both are required for meaningful national prosperity.”

      If this were true, then this: “Martin also slashed funding to social programs. He foresaw that crippling deficits imperiled Canada’s education and health-care systems” is either a contradiction or an admission that social programs ARE contrary to prosperity. The author says one thing and concludes something entirely different, as if writing the last part at 3:00 AM with an empty coffee pot.

    2. As a Canadian let me say, *barf*.

      The Canadians nonetheless turned back the assault.

      No, we didn’t. This 1812 dick-waving is so disheartening. It was mainly the British that turned back the assault.

      Also, our Charter is a legal superstar? Yikes. I think that says more about how the mores of the world have changed (for the general worse) than anything.

  30. Yeah, liberals are evil

    But this quaint notion of summers as a kids’ paradise is dangerously misleading, evidence from social research suggests.

    After spending the summer away from the classroom, children return to school one month or more, on average, behind where they were when the previous year ended. Kids also tend to put on weight in the summer two to three times faster than they do during the school year.

    To put it unkindly, the average child becomes dumber and fatter during the vacation.…..atter.html

    Your children must be under the surveillance and control of the state at all times. Fuck you Peter.

    1. You know, he must have looked at and had private time with a lot of little boys to know those facts.

      1. “I want you to know that each of your children has touched me, and I’m pretty sure I’ve touched all of them.”

    2. My kids are spending some time on Latin, informal logic, and math over the summer and aren’t under the surveillance and control of the state — well, I can’t be sure about the surveillance — so there’s that.

      1. Yeah, you know…one of my favorite things about summer as a kid was how much more I could read and learn than during the school year, when I had so much less time. Gah.

    3. And the children most prone to obesity were most likely to put on additional weight during the summer.

    4. As opposed to the Redneck Party?

    5. Well, they’re not factually wrong, at least about retention. On the other hand, kids don’t retain information for the same reason that adults don’t information after leaving high school — it’s neither useful nor something they care about.

  31. “Are Bachmann and Sununu attacks part of a new McCarthyism?”…..tid=pm_pop

    Fucking nutty wingnecks.

    1. McCain said on the Senate floor: “Huma represents what is best about America: the daughter of immigrants, who has risen to the highest levels of our government on the basis of her substantial personal merit and her abiding commitment to the American ideals that she embodies so fully.”

      While that should be the end of it, with Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-Minn.) and other members of Congress floating the charges and asking for investigations, the issue is not likely to die. All it takes is murky guilt by association and a dose of hysteria.

      Scary Muslim Brohood has infiltrated State!

      1. She’s not a bro.

  32. any national polling attention is helpful for Johnson’s increasingly unlikely campaign to earn a spot in the Fall debates.

    If he doesn’t get into the debates maybe a good second option would be to live blog his answers to the debate questions as well as what his rebuttals to Obamney’s brain droppings would be if he were there. Granted, it wouldn’t be a perfect solution, and it may be difficult to keep up with the moderator (while he’s typing his answer/ rebuttal the moderator’s already moving on to the next question, for example), but it may be better than nothing. Just a thought.

  33. A spiral galaxy formed … earlier than was thought possible, but apparently occurred because of unique circumstances.

    Jobless claims increased by 34,000 to 386,000 last week, a larger number than … wait for it … expected

    but apparently occurred because of unique circumstances.

    1. Pic of said gentleman:

      Boo Ya

    2. They shouldn’t use the word ‘stripper’ in a context like that that is bound to cause dissapointment.

  34. I, for one, welcome our Canadian overlords.

  35. Man puts out craiglist add for someone to rape his wife. Good thing she had a gun, as there were multiple takers.

  36. I give you all a present. You’re welcome.

    1. very nice

    2. Boing . . ’round 2:30 in, it gets goooood.

      1. [insert “down under” joke here]

    3. Thank you. Danke. Shukran. Spasebaw. Merci. Good on ya. Tashkoor.

      I do like that she is attractive, but also that she was smiling and had some joy in what she was doing. An excellent combination.

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