Job-Killing Tax Hikes, Snoopy Australians, Try Firing a Cop in Portland: P.M. Links

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  • Southern dumpling squid.

    Tax hikes on the wealthy may make political hay, but they could also cost up to 710,000 jobs that won't be created, warns Ernst & Young. In a study, the accounting firm says the hikes would hit not just individuals, but also pass-through small businesses that employ half the private sector.

  • Ron Paul got his last licks in at Ben Bernanke, prompting the Fed Chairman to complain that an audit of Federal Reserve Bank monetary policy would be a "nightmare scenario."
  • Australia's government wants expanded powers to spy on people online, including the ability to force companies to create backdoors for easier snooping.
  • Officers who have shot unarmed people, driven drunk and harassed minorities have all been fired by the Portland, Oregon, Police Department — only to be reinstated after the union complained to arbitrators.
  • Preston Bates, the 23-year-old head of a new libertarian super PAC that has already affected the outcome of a congressional primary, drunkenly described himself as an anarchist to cops who approached him after he backed his car into an iron fence near the University of Louisville. Brings back memories, really …
  • Sex sessions of up to three hours are typical of southern dumpling squid, says researcher Amanda Franklin, of the University of Melbourne in Australia. Her boyfriend should probably just throw in the towel.

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  1. Tax hikes on the wealthy may make political hay, but they could also cost up to 710,000 jobs that won’t be created…

    Acceptable, collateral damage in the righteous Class Wars.

    1. Impossible! Wealthy people don’t create jobs. Our resident retards told me so.

      1. see…the same govt whose action created that business can, with later action, take it away.

      2. Um, I believe the correct exclamation is “unpossible!”

      3. Of course they don’t create jerbz. Just like business owners didn’t build their businesses.

  2. …prompting the Fed Chairman to complain that an audit of Federal Reserve Bank monetary policy would be a “nightmare scenario.”

    I mean, he’ll see everything. He’ll… he’ll see the Big Board!

    1. It would only be a nightmare for the people who would have to go through the Fed’s balance sheet.

      1. And the poor assistants that would have to shred the documents before the audit.

      2. What is the materiality threshold there? $100 milllion?

      3. If it’s not written in triple-encrypted Esperanto with multiple self-destruct triggers followed by 18,000 equations (some of which have been hypothesized to predict the physics of a black hole singularity), then, frankly, I’ll be very disappointed.

  3. TENTACLE PORN!!!

    1. Man, this is turning into the gaffe to end all gaffes. No wonder his supporters are going apeshit trying to mitigate the damage.

      1. At this point he should really ride around in a tank with a helmet that makes him look like a bobblehead doll.

        1. “My people were little people. Little swarthy people.”

      2. You could tell it was going to stick by how ape shit they went. It is such a perfect short sound bite. It was too good not to stick.

        1. It’s funny because they have two very bad choices. Their dear leader is a boneheaded idiot, or he’s a vicious collectivist. Not a good place to be.

          1. Either Obama thinks the government really owns every business in America or he is President Ron Burgundy who will read anything, no matter how stupid, that is put his teleprompter.

            How about both?

            1. I’m Ron Burgundy?

            2. Obama thinks the government really owns every business in America

              Full stop.

            3. Go fuck yourself, San Diego.

              (how awesome would it be if The Obama actually said that? How would his idol worshipers spin it?)

      3. Yeah I love the comment “that’s taken out of context, he was talking about roads and bridges”.

        Ok, well who paid for the roads and bridges? Oh right, hard working business owners and tax payers with salaries!

        The other point about the roads and bridges comment that kind of pisses me off — is yes the government does take charge of roads and bridges, but not because no one else is capable of paying for or building them. It would be like me taking $5 out of your pocket, paying for a sandwich and giving it to you and saying “you would have starved to death if it weren’t for me!”

        1. It would be like me taking $5 out of your pocket, paying for a sandwich and giving it to you and saying “you would have starved to death if it weren’t for me!”

          More like, me breaking your leg and handing you a crutch and saying, “see, if it wasn’t for me, you wouldn’t be able to walk.

          ~ Harry Browne

        2. It would be like me taking $5 out of your pocket, paying for a sandwich and giving it to you and saying “you would have starved to death if it weren’t for me!”

          I may actually try this with my liberal girlfriend, and see how she reacts.

      4. Dude. It’s almost as big as Pepper Spray Cop.

      5. Someone should try to hack his email account for more comedy gold. I have a feeling the password is 12345.

    2. The Starship one cracked me up.

      1. The debt one is pretty good too.

      2. Yeah, I liked that one too. Because that song is an abomination. And my sister had that album, loved it, and played it nonstop.

        1. Everybody’s playing corporation games. Who cares? They’re always changing corporation names.

          1. MAKE IT STOP

            1. MARCONI PLAYS THE MAMBA. LISTEN TO THE RADIO.

              1. I just passed out for 3 minutes. Thanks a lot.

          2. Said the band who changed their name 3 times.

          3. Sara, Sara, storms are brewing in your eyes.
            Sara, Sara, no time is a good time for good-byes.

      3. This one:

        http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-MdBD…..rnment.jpg

    3. You’re taking that out of context!!!1!!!111!!

      1. Context!!!

        It deserves its own meme.

  4. Sex sessions of up to three hours are typical of southern dumpling squid…

    Dumpling Squids: The Gordon Sumners of the Sea.

    1. I thought that said Gordon Shumway at first.

      Is it bad that I know who both those Gordon’s are?

      1. Huh, according to wikipedia, Gordon Shumway was named for Gordon Sumner.

    2. The Hammers of the Sea.

      1. You know they’re not including a lobster dinner and begging in that three hours, right?

        1. With tequila, you can get it down to about 1 hour.

        2. Begging? Or foreplay?

      2. Once you have had squid pussy, you never go back.

        1. Once you have a fly with broken wings dancing around on your pecker because it has nowhere else to go due to the water level in the tub, you never go back. Or, so I have been told.

  5. Obama creates 471,000 Jobs!
    http://unclemeat.wordpress.com…..than-jobs/

  6. Jezebel: World’s Funniest Human’s Guide To Pooping At Work

    What the fuck is wrong with these people? And remember, she gets paid to write this and that proves she’s funnier than any man could possibly be.

    1. Why do you guys punish yourselves by going to leftard feminist sites?

      1. NutraSweet was hoping he could use it as a guide for his work defecation sessions.

        He shits a lot. Like, inhuman amounts.

        1. I’m sure he could have found some more “how-to-poop” books at non-crazy sites. Heck, I’ll bet he’s even written a few!

            1. That the first Peas song I ever believed.

      2. Are you sure they are leftarded and not just simply retarded?

    2. Oh lord, that was terrible.

      1. I got two paragraphs in and threw in the towel. I assume the eventual punchline was great, though.

        1. The “punchline:”

          Idea 10: Oh My God, Just Get Over It Already

          Honestly, do you care if you hear somebody else pooping? Don’t you have quarterly reports to finish or something? Are you 12? Are you hanging out in the bathroom with one of those old-timey ear horns? Honestly, people. Honestly. I think this article proves that I’m the only grown-up left on earth.

          Jesus Christ. Confirmed every stereotype about female comedy.

          1. Not terribly funny, but good fundamentals.

            1. Decent hustle. Head on a swivel. Just needs to work drills to develop some kind of sense of what is funny.

            2. That more fun to read.

    3. “you make dollar, I make dime. That’s why i shit on company time”

    4. Seriously, they should hire a retarded intern who might accidentally stumble into something funny. Or a female chimp.

      1. No, that would provide the employer with something of value.

    5. How is it even possible make poop unfunny?

      1. Occult. Blood.

  7. Preston Bates, the 23-year-old head of a new libertarian super PAC that has already affected the outcome of a congressional primary, drunkenly described himself as an anarchist to cops…

    We can’t have nice things.

    1. Episiarch’s real name is Preston? Bates?

      1. But he prefers the title Master. He believes he’s earned it.

        1. “You’re pretty strong for a little lady and you have a lot of hair on your lip. We don’t like our waitresses to have hairy lips. So I’ll tell you what, shave. Oh, and after you shave, you’re fired.”

      2. He was fired by Larry Clark.

        I cant even been to explain how bizarre this is.

      3. In all cerealness, the first question in my mind was: which one of us is this?

        1. I don’t think any of the self-declared anarchists are young enough. Also, CHECK OUT THE DUDE’S OUTFIT. Killer.

          1. Seersucker with red plaid? Trying too hard. Especially in today’s world, seersucker is an excellent choice for summer, but it carries so much on its own that you want a plain shirt in white or blue underneath it. Although the bowtie is a nice touch.

            1. Bowties are cool.

        2. I’m guessing the young Goldwater

    2. Here is the video of his arrest: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2FzJfxyugek

      1. .301

        Umm shouldn’t the cops be taking that guy to a hospital?

    3. crap. I was actually thinking of giving to that PAC. it’s probably screwed now.

  8. Amanda Franklin is quite attractive. But who’d want to live up to that?

  9. Threadjack:

    James O’Keefe’s new Project Veritas video is a stunning expos? of union corruption surrounding so-called “shovel ready” jobs. In typically irreverent Project Veritas style, O’Keefe introduces a new company: Earth Supply and Renewal. What do they do? O’Keefe explains:

    First, our excavation specialists insert their shovels into the ground and remove the soil. This presents the problem of an existing hole in the earth, creating a dangerous situation that could lead to hazards, including but not limited to tripping, falling, and bodily injuries.
    Then there is the renewal process. At Earth Supply, we train professional backfillers to renew the soil in place of the existing hole, restoring the earth to its original condition.

    Some folks say we’re just digging ditches and filling them back up again. But it’s about more than that. It’s about jobs.

    http://www.breitbart.com/Big-G….._3Fw_3D369

    1. I don’t think you can threadjack the AM or PM links unless you bring a different thread over here.

    2. If only they buried banknotes *in* the holes, Krugman would be able to get behind the project.

      1. Or broke windows with the shovels.

        1. John Maynard Keynes never advocated breaking windows.

          But he did advocate having the government bury banknotes in mines that were then filled in.

        1. Oh I love the money fires!

    1. Not to worry, rts. I feel poorer.

    2. How can this be the first time?

      A 40k gap doesnt seem like something created over night.

      1. The 40k gap was created over millenia of rule by our glorious Emperor. Only through the Psyker purges he commands have we been able to stay uncorrupted by the forces of the Warp as the Xeno filth around us succumbs to Chao’s vile taint. Maintaining the gap between Humanity and the lesser races of the Galaxy is vital to the success of our Emperor and his Marines, and through them, all of Mankind.

        1. Well done riff off the 40K reference.

          1. I honestly just wanted to say “succumb to Chao’s vile taint” in a context other than a description of gay porn. NTTAWWT.

      2. It’s real estate and employment. Americans still hold more liquid assets.
        I feel as if I need to convert some of my holdings to jugs of maple syrup and baby harp seal pelts so I don’t feel so poor.

        1. You beat me to it.

          When I saw this article a day or so ago my immediate reaction was “house prices”.

          This, I believe, bears it out:

          But there is one caveat that could give the U.S. an ego boost: the average American holds more liquid assets?cash in hand?than the average Canadian.

          1. In other words, Canada’s got its own housing bubble going on. That should be fun to watch when it pops.

          2. But there is one caveat that could give the U.S. an ego boost: the average American holds more liquid assets?cash in hand?than the average Canadian.

            While Obama administration burns the midnight oil doing everything it can do to reduce the value of that cash and make sure you pay your fair share.

  10. Officers who have shot unarmed people, driven drunk and harassed minorities have all been fired by the Portland, Oregon, Police Department ? only to be reinstated after the union complained to arbitrators.

    Unions: Standing up for the little guy!

    1. I guess this is that punishment dunphy keeps talking about.

  11. If anyone ever needed food police.

    1. Didn’t even recognized him at first, had to read the comments. Good gawd, he let himself go.

      1. “Take me down to Kentucky Fried Chicken” is the best one.

  12. Police union representatives say the percentage of discipline cases they challenge is small. And they’re right; in the past 10 years, 12 discipline cases in the nearly 1,000-member police force ended up in arbitration. An arbitrator overturned the discipline in half; the others await a hearing or a ruling.

    So few incidents, I would think, could be handled by desk duty, or some assignments away from interaction with the public. Put these employees in go-nowhere, distasteful roles that make them want to quit and go be some other city’s headaches.

  13. The results have thus far been mixed

    Mixed? How is all bad mixed?

    1. Uh?

      1. It was a quote from one of the articles linked above.

        1. Yeah, I gathered. But there wasn’t a hint as to which.

          1. You’re supposed to read his mind. Dumbass.

            1. I thought we were supposed to read the articles before commenting.

              Sigh…full context:

              In response to a deep financial crisis and the worst recession in generations, the Fed brought official borrowing costs to effectively zero and bought some $2.3 trillion in Treasury and mortgage bonds in an effort to spur economic growth.
              The results have thus far been mixed, with economic growth braking sharply this year after a strong finish to 2011 and the unemployment rate stuck at a still-high 8.2 percent.

              1. Some of us are trying to work while commenting on the PM links, rob.

              2. Read the articles? What is this, Playboy?

    1. Which means all those liberals are going to have to start letting paleo-cons into their clubs.

  14. Sex sessions of up to three hours are typical of southern dumpling squid

    Wouldn’t that be an evolutionary disadvantage?

    1. Nah, it’s too their advantage to have exceptional hearing, which they must have, because they can obviously hear Barry White.

  15. Rare audio of an actual nuclear blast.

    Normally when footage of a nuclear blast is shown, a stock “explosion” sound is added. And of course the blast and its sound occur simultaneously.

    1. My recently deceased grandpa witnessed this nuclear test live and as close as you could get back in the 1950s when the government decided to simulate nuclear combat using Marines as guinea pigs.

      For decades he and other atomic veterans had to fight to get recognition and compensation from the government due to the damage exposure to radiation did to them and their families with contaminated genes.

      1. Did he talk about it a lot? How close were they to the actual blast?

        1. I did a full interview for him once for a school project. I don’t recall how close they were, only that he described the ground shaking violently, birds falling out of the sky, strong blast winds and dust, and when the x-ray burst came he could see the skeleton of the guy next to him. They weren’t wearing any special radiation suits, just their normal combat clothes.

          Once the blast subsided they were to climb out of the trench and attack an imaginary enemy near ground zero. What really damaged their health was all that radioactive dust that would get in their body. He was rightly pissed for many years because of the way the government ignored them when it came to compensation for the health damage.

          1. Amazing how evil people can be in the name of government, even here. It just torques me to no end to hear stories like this. Not only did they expose him to something dangerous, they didn’t make any effort to make him whole afterwards.

            1. I was a senior in high school when I did the interview project, it really changed my perception of the military and the government and was one of the factors that lead to me being a libertarian.

          2. . . . nd when the x-ray burst came he could see the skeleton of the guy next to him.

            Okay, now that is fucking trippy.

            I say no matter how ignorant you may be of stuff like radiation and its effects on the body, if you ever saw something like that, you would immediately know you’d been exposed to something harmful.

            1. I don’t want to malign ASM’s grandpa, but I have serious doubts that this is physically possible. X-rays won’t make your skin and musculature transparent, and the human eye can’t detect them directly. Any physicists out there who can give us the low down?

              1. I’m not a physicist but that part of the story must be BS. Your eyes can’t detect X-Rays, and any x-ray burst would arrive instantaneously, not some time later like a shock wave or sound pulse.

                1. Well here’s his own account recorded in a newspaper article:

                  http://www.groundreport.com/He…..mo/2946064

                  His is the first account.

                2. I’m having trouble finding it, but I read somewhere years ago that the light is so intense it can shine through soft tissue, but not bone, so the after-image of the flash can leave the impression that you’ve seen someone’s skeleton.

                  I wish I could find a decent source confirming that. There’s something gruesomely fascinating about the prospect.

                  1. I read somewhere years ago that the light is so intense it can shine through soft tissue, but not bone, so the after-image of the flash can leave the impression that you’ve seen someone’s skeleton.

                    If you did see that, it would probably be the very last thing you ever saw, since your retinas would be reduced to little wisps of ash.

                    There’s something gruesomely fascinating about the prospect.

                    I absolutely agree. I’ve had a morbid fascination with this shit for years.

                    1. These guys were 18,500 feet away from a blast and didn’t go blind. And they don’t even have sunglasses.

                      http://io9.com/5926962/watch-a…..omic-blast

                    2. These guys were 18,500 feet away from a blast and didn’t go blind. And they don’t even have sunglasses.

                      And that was even an airburst, detonated above them. From what I’ve read, airbursts are the worst in terms of the fallout. As for why their vision wasnt harmed, my guess is that it’s because it was a 2-kiloton bomb, which makes it about an eighth the size of the one dropped on Hiroshima.

            2. No joke, Karl. That is some crazy shit. Sorry for your grandpa, Serious Man, but thanks for the story.

              1. That is some crazy shit.

                Crazy as it sounds, I’d love to have witnessed an atomic test. As horrifying as nuclear weapons are, I still find this shit fascinating.

                1. As for seeing the skeleton, is it possible the light was so bright it just went through the rest of the body and the skeleton was the only part that blocked it? Didn’t need to be X-rays. Hold a flashlight under your fingers – you see through the thin parts, but not the thicker parts. Make the flashlight millions of times brighter and you see a skeleton.

                  PS Don’t tell the TSA.

      2. So, uhh… your the product of damaged genes?

        NTTAWWT

    2. I’m pretty sure Trinity included an unedited, undubbed with-real-sound nuclear explosion.

      (If you’ve not seen it, I highly recommend it if for nothing else than it is narrated by Shatner).

      1. I saw that, an excellent documentary. The camera they set up inside that submarine that captured the moment it imploded after the blast . . . riveting stuff.

        And yeah, Shatner.

        1. Also Chinese mounted infantry, riding towards the blast.

          Good times, good times.

    3. Thanks for finding that. I found the gap between seeing the blast and hearing the sound to be the most interesting part.

      1. I’ve always found it a little bit irritating in the movies when the thunderclap occurs simultaneously with the lightning stroke. Just like with a nuclear blast, the sound travels so much more slowly than the light that unless you’re right next to the blast, there’s going to be considerable delay. My guess is that the testees were several miles away from these blasts. I wouldn’t surprised if it took 20-30 seconds for the sound to reach them.

        1. Yeah, makes that whole flash-to-bang technique for estimating the distance kinda useless. I do it sometimes still during thunderstorms and get funny looks from the wife.

          1. I do it sometimes still during thunderstorms and get funny looks from the wife.

            I just hide under the covers and sing the Thunder Buddy Song.

            *** NSFW ***

    4. That’s really cool and kind of scary. Especially that squelchy electronic noise just as the sky lights up.

  16. Jeremy Lin nets $3M by being traded to TX.

    1. Stop the linsanity.

    2. He wasn’t traded.

      1. Correct, he was in a sort of semi-free agent status where he could negotiate with any team, but the Knicks had a right to match the offer.

        He signed an offer sheet with Houston, the Knicks refused to match.

        1. No, Houston made an offer the Knicks couldn’t match. It’s backloaded to kick in hard in a year where the Knicks are already committed to pay 75 mil.

    3. I’m a Mavericks fan personally, but since I have family ties to the Rockets I will say that’s pretty nice.

  17. If small changes in the tax rate have that profound an effect on employment, how come the unemployment rate has increased since the beginning of the Bush tax cuts?

    1. Did you notice the housing market is a bit weak? Possibly Europe is overextended? A few states and cities are having mild fiscal problems?

      Point: Things would be even worse with higher tax rates.

      1. Point: Things would be even worse with higher tax rates.

        So your arguement for the success of the Bush tax cuts is the same as the argument for the success of the Obama stimulus?

        1. No not really.

          see

          http://mises.org/daily/3369

          and maybe here if you are still interested

          http://mises.org/daily/3540

          1. Both of those articles remind me of global warming articles. How dare all you ignorant masses not believe our economists with the tons of scientific proof–none of which we’re going to present here.

            1. hmmm, they reminded me of the epistemological distinctions between a-priori versus empirical modes of argumentation. Which I thought was pertinent.

              1. Except they don’t actually make any empirical arguments in either article, they just appeal to the authority of various prominent economists. Now they claim those economists can make the necessary empirical arguments, but why bother with the indirection when you could just present the empirical claims themselves?

                That’s what kinda reminded me of the pro-global warming crowd. “We’ve got this list of thousands of prominent scientists that support AGW.” “That’s great, what’s the evidence they claim as the basis for this support?” “Why won’t you trust these prominent scientists? You’re just being anti-empirical!”

                1. Why won’t you trust these prominent scientists? You’re just being anti-empirical!

                  That is the exact opposite of what they are arguing.

                  They are saying that the a-priori/deductive methodology is the appropriate one for making economic arguments.

        2. Other than the fact that we are worse off with the stimulus than Obama said we would be without it, your takedown is spot on.

          1. It’s not “take down”, more just wanting to point out that whatever the economic effects on tax structure on job creation in general, it’s obvious that tax rates are not at present the primary driver of employment. It would be better to focus on the things that currently have the biggest impact on margin job creation than obsessing over small changes in the tax rate.

          2. I’m sure if you went back to find the economic prediction at the time the Bush Tax Cuts were signed, you’d find that we’re currently worse off with the tax cuts than Bush said we would be without them. Making arguments based on counter-hypotheticals are pointless regardless of which party is making them.

            1. And my point was that you can’t look at any one item in a vacuum – you have to see it in context. All that other shit was going on at the same time that were much larger influences.

              Apparently you missed that subtlety.

    2. Just imagine how bad it would have been with out them? Isn’t that how these arguments work?

  18. Pieces of shit camp out to protect Paterno statue.

    1. And Penn State was really an up and coming school in corporate America. After this pile of stupid, I think I would pass on a PSU grad.

      1. I heard the Board changed their mind and decided to rotate the statue so it’s looking the other way.

        1. Is it going to be looking at the showers now?

        2. Nice.

        3. Do you know why the Penn State library is named after Paterno? Because it’s so big that even if you know the book you want is in there, it’ll take 14 years for it to come out.

          1. Weak followup. Too wordy.

    2. Clearly the lesson here is that instead of telling the Penn State administration that Sandusky was molesting children, they should have told the administration that he was planning to vandalize them.

    3. *sigh*

      I wonder what their majors are? So far only two students there.

    4. They could be waiting a while. CDT says the Board of Trustees is taking their good old time to make a decision about the statue.

      http://www.centredaily.com/201…..ckson.html

    1. I want to be impressed…but it’s the CFL.

      1. I was impressed with him not giving up the rouge.

      2. I can’t help but wonder… If he’d been playing actual football players would he have made it out of the first endzone?

        1. If he had been playing against the Seahawks? Yes.

          1. I repeat:

            been playing actual football players

            1. Technically, the Seahawks defensive line is composed of professional football players.

              And technically is the best kind of correct.

              1. I have a new vow. I solemnly swear that I will become not the worst blernsball player of all time.

      3. There are 3 types of CFL Players:
        Those who will one day play in the NFL
        Those who used to play in the NFL
        Those who will never play in the NFL

    2. Thats about 75 yards in America?

      1. American points are worth 1.01 Canadian Points.

        1. Yesterday I had Canadian “bacon” for the first time. It is nothing but ham. I demand an apology.

          1. We call it back bacon.

          2. Saturday I had the hot Brown sandwich at the Brown Hotel in Louisville.

            It has bacon on it. And it was one of the greatest single items I’ve ever eaten in my life. I had to share that.

    3. You knew he was gone when he passed Centerfield.

      And, of course, no NFL player can score a touchdown in July either.

      1. You mean centrefield.

    4. Canada. Nobody gives a shit about those damn 1%er hosers.

    5. “All right, hosers. I want all 12 of us fighting for every meter on all three downs. And we’re going to make this a Boxing Day the Prime Minister will never forget!”

  19. More attacks by cute aquatic mammals.

    1. Wait, Crazed beaver attacking women, are you sure this isn’t about a flamewar on Jezebel?

  20. Florida man, 71, shoots at robbers in internet cafe.

    “Based on what I have seen and what I know at this time, I don’t anticipate filing any charges,” Bill Gladson of the State Attorney’s Office told Ocala.com.

    1. He’s not, um, white Hispanic or anything, right?

      1. He’s not, um, white Hispanic or anything, right?

        Nope, sounds like he’s a plain-vanilla Florida cracker. The Daily Mail has a better writeup, complete with more pics.

        http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..-door.html

    2. Were they cyber criminals? Because if so he should have shot at them with garbage packets.

    1. Still beats Mr. Rogers showing his dick to kids.

      On that note, remember when Kasey Kasem was caught on tape going batshit crazy on one of his producers? Classic stuff!

  21. Blows my mind how fast some of you guys write. I’m still up in the Tim Cav article, missed several post between that one and the last one I contributed, and some of you guys have several post in almost every thread between. Sheesh!

    1. And I’m also writing code at the same time. Multitasking FTW.

      1. He’s also developmentally delayed, so it’s really quite impressive.

        1. Thanks, FoE…hey!

      2. I’m mltitasking a job assignment too, so multitask FTW, but I can’t sub-multitask multiple threads while doing an assignment at the same time. So, what’s the deal?

        1. If it involves head chips and designer drugs hint at some sources.

        2. I cloned myself.

      3. I’m writing code to write my comments for me.

        1. Sorry, Auric, we already have the anon-bot.

          1. And o3.

          2. Doherty once asked if I was a bot that just complained about missing alt-text.

        2. I use T4 to write my code so I can have more time to comment.

          1. You comment your code? You monster!

            1. What a chump!

            2. Ah, no. Of course all of my code is “self-commenting”. I mean more time to comment at H’n’R.

    2. I know right. I bow down to y’alls internet fu. My productivity goes to shit when there are that many articles to slog through.

      1. Well there’s your problem right there. You actually read the articles.

  22. 3 hours, well if they mean the whole sex session and not strictly the intercourse I wouldn’t even call that out of the ordinary for my wife and I. I mean it is certainly above average but hardly rare.

    1. Yep. I’ve always wondered if it is a non-Hispanic white thing to expect sex to last less than a half hour. It’s just not in my realm of experience. Not bragging, it just really isn’t.

      1. And the whole you lose your erection after the first four or five orgasms, I’ve seen it in porn movies, what’s that like?

        1. I have no idea about that one, I typically only have 1 to 2 in a session, She on the other hand tends to loose count after 6 or 7.

          Again I won’t say 3 hours is average but if we didn’t have 4 kids 2 hours + would be.

          1. In the early stages of a relationship, all nighters, are standard and expected, but, yeah, nothing less than half an hour, hour not out of ordinary, but if the grandparents are watching the kid, three hours is an impossibility.

  23. if you actually read the link in the portland article you realize a couple of things. first of all, the cases that go to arbitration are a relatively small # of discipline cases.

    and 1/2 of the arbitration cases are NOT overturned by the arbitrator. iow, it’s erroneous that you can’t fire or discipline a portland cop

    happens frequently.

    but, as the article notes, many cases where officers are fired, an arbitrator reverses based on a # of criteria

    and of course without links TO the arbitrator reports, there is no way to know if they made a good decision

    otoh, i know of 4 arbitrator cases in my agency recently. 2 were overturned firings and 2 were not overturned

    and i read each one

    and in every case, the arbitrator was right

    these are VERY well trained attorneys, with a wealth of investigative experience and often some really relevant schooling and training in such investigations

    they also, unlike police chiefs, etc. don’t have a bias towards or against certain officers

    iow, there is nothing in this article that supports the idea that portland cops are getting away with shit

    and unless and until i see the arbitrator reports, which are usually public record i might note, it’s just supposition and smoke and mirrors

    1. arbitration is part of due process.

      i also found the examples where police chiefs (police chiefs being almost universally appointed politicians with a huge agenda) fired cops to be interesting

      like one example was a cop who drunk drove off duty.

      most likely this firing was overturned due to past precedent, and the concept of progressive discipline

      i know a few officers in my agency who were SUSPENDED for driving DUI off duty, but since past precedent is a 5 day suspension w/o pay, a firing would naturally raise an arbitrator’s interest (unless there was more than one offense or the guy was a longstanding discipline problem)

      another one was ridiculous. a police chief fired a guy for selling “Smoke ‘Em, Don’t Choke ‘Em” T-shirts to officers after a man died in police custody from a neck hold.

      lol. guess what, with some exceptions, officers have first amendment rights, too. likely that firing was constitutionally suspect.

      there was a case years back where an officer wore a shirt promoting death penalty that showed a hanged (black) man (apparently) on its face. he was disciplined. the case was overturned on 1st amendment grounds

      reasonoids LOVE due process when it comes to suspect rights like miranda , suppression of evidence unlawfully obtained

      1. but when it comes to due process for cops, which means yes – chiefs can’t make ad hoc bogus decisions to fire cops without review, all of a sudden it’s some kind of (without evidence) “SCANDAL”

        again, present the arbitrator reports and let’s make a decision FROM EVIDENCE. without it, i side with the arbitrators because ime they make fair, intelligent, and fact based decisions

        i would never choose to work for an agency that didn’t allow cases to go to arbitration

        btw, as a counterexample, the paul schene jail cell beating – he requested arbitration and was denied. because he was guilty as fuck.

        cases that go to arbitration do so for good reason and arbitrators almost always overturn for damn good reason too

        due process. it’s what’s for dinner

        1. At will employment is something we’re also kind of fond of around here. Union negotiated employment contracts? Not so much.

          1. wonderful. but GIVEN a contract, it is to be respected. as is due process. you want GOOD cops, you support due process for cops, and such contracts.

            because i, as a good cop, and other good cops, will choose the agencies that respect due process and arbitration because we will be protected from WRONGFUL firings, as is just and moral

            1. I support contracts that are fair and equitable as much to the taxpayer (you know, your actual bosses) as they are to the police. GOOD cops should be fighting against the kinds of unconstitutional laws, excesses, and corruption that bad cops/politicians are bringing to their departments.

              1. and a contract that gives the option of arbitration is fair, equitable and just

                and as the article suggests, the cases the arbitatrator overturned (a mere 6 cases in TEN YEARS) are exactly the kind of cases we want overturned in the mame of justice.

                and good cops are fighting the excesses.

                the good cops here fought the craven, fuckstick political hack cop-o-crat police chief’s unjustified suspension (in the case i mentioned) and got the ofc. reinstated

                good

                1. Are arbitration clauses in employment contracts pretty common place, or is that just something that unions have been able to negotiate for?

                  Serious question.

        2. “decisions to fire … without review..”

          That’s’s the way it is for me

          1. great. contracts. how do those work?

            1. Like no-bid contracts, only more corrupt?

    2. and 1/2 of the arbitration cases are NOT overturned by the arbitrator. iow, it’s erroneous that you can’t fire or discipline a portland cop

      An arbitrator overturned the discipline in half; the others await a hearing or a ruling.

      Not overturned, yet, dumbass, yet.

      1. actually, that’s correct and i stand corrected. unlike most anti-cop bigots here, i can make such admissions.

        that aside, you have a 1000 officer agency. does the article (either one) state how many officers WERE fired for cause in that 10 yrs?

        no

        so, again, there is stuff we know and stuff we don’t know. what we DO know is that arbitration is used rarely (12 cases) and even if ALL 12 are eventually overturned, for a 1000 member agency, 12 discipline cases in 10 yrs is a TINY percentage of their total.

        there is no “there” there in this article

        just an example of the system WORKING

        you got a vicious political cop-o-crat hack, who (for example) in a case where a guy reached into a car to turn off the engine to try to make the scene safe, she drove off with him being dragged, so he shot her

        and he got 900 hrs.

        entirely results based. there was no policy against reaching in (i’ve done it myself), and other officers had done so with no discipline

        iow, the chief was arbitrary, unfair and inconsistent with past practice

        and fortunately, an arbitrator was there to bitch slap him and protect rights

        i realize anticop bigots don’t like rights, when it comes to cops, but in agencies where we have a contract with arbitrator review, that’s our right

        and it’s a good right, since it helps punish bad guys and helps RESTORE good guys

        justice matters

        but mea culpa. you were correct about the other 6

        1. actually, that’s correct and i stand corrected. unlike most anti-cop bigots here, i can make such admissions.

          You’re incredibly fond of saying that, but who specifically are you referring to?

          1. Also, you can, yes, but you only do when it doesn’t completely destroy your point. When that happens, you just disengage and bring the same shit up again a week or two later, hoping that no one calls you on it again.

    3. and 1/2 of the arbitration cases are NOT overturned by the arbitrator. iow, it’s erroneous that you can’t fire or discipline a portland cop

      It would be, if anyone had actually said that.

  24. Paging Warty. Good article about World Strongmen competitors.

    1. I’ll be in my bunk…

  25. Obama plans to further centralize education by creating a National Teachers Corps where the elite teachers get to share their divine wisdom to us lesser creatures. Oh yeah, this totally won’t be politicized in the way they select the teachers.

    1. Oh look! Graft!

  26. facts vs. reason rhetoric:” Police union representatives say the percentage of discipline cases they challenge is small. And they’re right; in the past 10 years, 12 discipline cases in the nearly 1,000-member police force ended up in arbitration. An arbitrator overturned the discipline in half; the others await a hearing or a ruling.”

    so, in SIX cases in the last TEN YEARS arbitrators have overturned.

    OMG, it’s an epidemic.

    reason hysteria meter: .9999/1

    1. “..12 discipline cases in the nearly 1,000-member police force ended up in arbitration.”

      And how many complaints ever got to the review process?

      1. again, how many angels can dance on the head of a pin?

        who knows?

        what i do KNOW (Iow facts, not conjecture) is that the arbitration process is used very rarely (12 times in ten years) and basd on the evidence in the articles, it appears pretty justified (the overturning) based on the evidence given

        and based on my past experience actually reading arbitrator reports, whihc i suggest most people have never done. iow, i can at least comment on their competence from a position of experience

        the article basically (the oregon live one) is a big pout piece with the underlying theme “darn these arbitrators. our police chief can’t even make arbitrary, poorly justified discipline decisions without an impartial due process review”

        i mean. who woulda thunk?

        due process matters to me. whether it’s criminal defendants in court, or cop defendants.

        police chiefs are politicians. and yes, some discipline decisions they make are going to be purely political. i’ve seen it in my own agency.

        and oveturned by an impartial, skilled, educated arbitrator.

        as it should be.

        do you disagree with any specific decisions mentioned?

  27. DO I have to bust yet another chick sex myth? Three hours is way too fucking long for fucking. Ever hear of chafing?*

    *I assume they’re talking about 3 hours of penetration. If they’re talking about foreplay + penetration, then, well, it’s still too long. An hour, tops.

    1. While chaffing is indeed an issue with extended penetration I have known more than a small number of women who have no problem whatsoever with several hours of foreplay.

      Course most of the people I know are heavily into BDSM or swinging so that would kind of skew things.

    2. If they’re talking about foreplay + penetration, then, well, it’s still too long. An hour, tops.

      do you count dinner and a movie?

      1. I do not count dinner and a movie as foreplay, FCOL. I hate going to the movies, anyway, so unless it’s got Chris Hemsworth or Adam Baldwin, I’ll probably be less horny at the end of the evening.

    3. Three hours is way too fucking long for fucking. Ever hear of chafing?

      That’s only if you stick with the same hole the entire time.

  28. here’s a perfect example of a bogus suspension that was overturned by the arbitrator: The arbitrator’s ruling that dismissed former Chief Mark Kroeker’s 900-hour suspension of McCollister reads as a template for how arbitration has worn down Portland police discipline. The litany of reasons for overturning the suspension have popped up in multiple Portland arbitration decisions since. Kroeker had ruled McCollister should not have put himself in such a precarious position by reaching into a moving car to try to stop Kendra James from driving off, only to fatally shoot her in 2003.

    Kroeker testified that he recognized the unusually long suspension was “ground-breaking” in the bureau, and said he issued it to “send a message to the officer and to the organization” that McCollister’s tactics were faulty, and led to the use of deadly force.

    “Policing is the kind of profession where the employer must be able to exercise its subjective judgment in making disciplinary decisions; so long as that subjective judgment is exercised in good faith, the arbitrator should not second guess the disciplinary decisions and sanctions imposed,” Kroeker argued.

    But the union quickly cited two cases in which officers had reached into moving vehicles without facing such harsh discipline.

  29. One involved a highly respected officer, Mike Stradley, who climbed entirely into a moving van to take a suspect into custody and ended up firing his Taser while the van was traveling 80 mph through a city neighborhood. A written reprimand was proposed. The other case involved then-Officer Jim Lawrence, who shot and killed a suspect while reaching into the open window of a moving van and being dragged. He received no discipline.

    The McCollister discipline was further derailed because no internal affairs investigation was ever done. Instead, the bureau relied solely on the detectives’ criminal inquiry, which the union pointed out was contrary to past practice. For a final blow, all the bureau training instructors testified that McCollister had acted as trained, and no policy existed then that restricted an officer from reaching in to a moving vehicle.

    Sound familiar?

    Once McCollister’s suspension was reversed, the arbitrator ordered the city to make McCollister whole not only for his back pay, but also include 1.88 hours of overtime for each week he was suspended. The union said the city must compensate him for what he “would have earned.”

    CLASSIC CASE OF UNSUPPORTED REULTS BASED ANALYSIS. GOOD FOR THE ARBITRATOR. AND GOOD FOR THE VINDICATED COP.

  30. the portland police chief kroeker is also full of shit , a classic cop-o-crat. contrary to his belief, it’s not enough that discipline be offered in “good faith”

    it must also be consistent with policy, past precedent, and due process.

    good faith is nowhere NEAR enough. what a fuckstick of a police chief. typical

  31. SEC investigating the Amish:

    http://buzz.money.cnn.com/2012…..?iid=HP_LN

  32. also, just like in the above case, i once reached into a running vehicle to turn off the engine and take the keys. and just like portland, my agency had no policy against it. it turned out to be a stolen car and the guy was extremely dui (.464 which is amazing he was conscious) and i very well could have saved a life.

    i did it at risk to myself, because good officers do that, and if he had started dragging me and i shot him, that would be his fault, not mine

    just like in the portland case.

    fuck that ignorant, cop-o-crat police chief fuckstick

  33. Amazon charging sales tax in more states:

    http://money.cnn.com/2012/07/1…..m?iid=Lead

  34. JB finally get her period. Looks thrilled about it.

    http://cdn.wwtdd.com/wp-conten…..er-570.jpg

    1. I kind of get how little girls get crushes on “safe” and “non-threatening” boys, but seriously? The dudes I crushed on in my tweens were pretty, but manly-pretty (Dirk Benedict A-Team era, Simon Le Bon). That thing is girly-pretty.

      1. I was never a big fan, but Benedict’s double-take at the Cyclon in the A-Team intro was classic.

        1. I didn’t get that reference ’til last year when I saw the most recent BSG series for the first time.

      2. Oh, Leif Garret, I totally understood the swooning which the girls in my fifth grade class were afflicted. No homo. Well, not much. Back then Tiger Beat was full of tigers. Now its all pussies.

    2. get her period? What’s with the war between me and the English language today? I surrender English, you win! Now make those nouns and verbs agree.

      And, I be damned, apparently you can get pregnant through anal sex if you have this condition.

      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rectovaginal_fistula

      Does Sugarfree know about this?

      1. “I do not avoid women, Mandrake… but I do deny them my essence.”

        1. You’re gonna have to answer to the Coca Cola company!

  35. You are familiar with the Internet Movie Database.

    Were you aware that there’s a Racial Slur Database?

    http://www.rsdb.org/full

    1. Some funny stuff in there (antique farm equipment — that’s rough), but the definition of ‘Aryan’ for instance, is sheer ignorance.

  36. Sex sessions of up to three hours are typical of southern dumpling squid, says researcher Amanda Franklin, of the University of Melbourne in Australia. Her boyfriend should probably just throw in the towel.

    It has been my experience that after a woman orgasms 99 times out of 100 she pretty much wants you to stop after 10 min or so.

    1. Especially if she was faking the orgasm in the first place.

    2. ..after a woman orgasms 99 times…

      that’s about average in my experience.

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