Democratic Website Publishes List of Obama Accomplishments, Half of Them Are the Names of People He's Killed


Because the studio audience needs to know when to clap, the Democratic Hub, a forum for the "Advanced Liberal Political Community," keeps a running tab of President Obama's accomplishments. Half the list, as Charles Davis points out, is dead people:

The rest of the list contains many more evil Muslims, which proves that Obama truly is the best. 

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  1. 12/17/11: Surely there must be a mistake. My friend’s husband is being sent to Iraq now. He must have gotten the wrong orders or something.

    1. He must be a uniformed consultant/security training specialist/noncombat observer/anything but a soldier.

    2. You just don’t understand dates at all.

      Day/Year/Month, you retard.

      1. Dates work differently in America.

        1. I don’t think anywhere uses DD/YY/MM, so, umm, yeah, I guess it was a shitty joke now that I’ve had to explain it.

          1. Yeah, went right over my head until I put it into context and read your joke correctly.

            1. Thanks for the admission, but that doesn’t absolve my substandard jokery.

              1. Gallagher says tt helps if while you’re telling it, you smash a watermelon with a sledge hammer.

    3. My brother in law is a Major in the Army (MP) and is being deployed to Iraq in about 3 weeks. He just got his clothing allowance, which is for civilian clothes. He still hasn’t gotten his directive and his orders are merely to report to the US Embassy in Baghdad.

      It’s all bizarre.

      1. Sad to say – that is typical, if he is USAR.
        In ’98 I was just told to go to Ft. Benning – and you will end up in Europe somewhere related to the Bosnia thing.

  2. the best part about this tactic is that if the kill list were tied to a Repub, it would be used as reason to oppose that person. Good to know Democratic Hub is staunchly committed to principle.

    If Romney is elected, we may have the answer to the question of what happened to all the peaceniks who used to protest the guy without the kill list?

  3. Possibly to defang the right-wing nuts who think he is a “secret Muslin”.

    1. actually “secret Muslim” does not work the way you think it works – those killed become instant martyrs, replaced by a new body.

    2. Killing a bunch of Muslims isn’t exactly inconsistent with being a Muslim, secret or no, so I’m not sure how the kill list rebuts the notion that he is a secret Muslim.

    3. He only beats you because those Republicans make him so mad.

    4. I always thought he was a secret Christian.

  4. Hey, nothing polishes a Nobel Peace Prize like the blood of Muslims.

    1. Nicely done.

    2. + 100000000 for you!

    3. It worked for Arafat and what’s-his-face.

    4. nothing polishes a Nobel Peace Prize like the blood of Muslims

      Unsurprising considering their historic mastery of alchemy.

  5. At least the Clintons had the common decency to keep Vince Foster off any list of accomplishments.

    1. Or Jeremy Boorda.

  6. 06/07/11 – some dude gets whacked at a Somali checkpoint and it is listed as an O!-complishment?

    These guys must have a good medical plan to cover all the stretch injuries they must be accruing.

    1. Sir, you beat me to it.

      Anyhoo, “senior Al-Qaeda” dude gets whacked ….

    2. You’ve apparently never encountered a left-statist backbone. Mr. Fantastic and Plasticman are both envious.

  7. Would someone please inform me how murdering people now counts as an “accomplishment?”

    Shouldn’t Bin-Laden be awarded the next peace prize?

    1. That would be rich, a posthumous award to someone killed by the previous Peace Prize winner. I so want this to happen now so the universe can implode!

    2. Oh come on now, you have to apply feelings not the cold blooded analysis of logic and law. What are you, a robot?

      1. What are you, a robot?

        Aren’t all libertarians considered robots to (insert “compassionate” TEAM PLAYER here)?


          1. except Daleks aren’t robots. apparently neither are Cybamen, according to the new writers.

            Autons maybe, but they didn’t have a nifty catchphrase.

            1. All right then:

              AUTOBOTS, ROLL OUT.

              1. not from Dr. Who, but I can’t help but appreciate the image of the Autobots wiping out mankind.

    3. Alfred Nobel specified that the awards could not be posthumous, so bin Laden is ineligible.

      Obama tagged OBL first, so he wins.

    4. 9/11/2001: Created thousands of jobs in the construction industry as well as thousands more in police, fire, airport security and funeral services.

  8. Too bad the list doesn’t include Obama’s Peace Prize. With all the killings, that would be the ultimate “fuck you” to anyone who voted for him.

    1. Perhaps he could order a drone strike on the Prize itself.

      1. The Prize is so peaceful that it is immune to any form of violence.

  9. “Shrink, I wanna kill. I wanna kill. I wanna kill, kill, kill, kill…”

    Sergeant enters: “You’re our boy.”

    / Arlo Guthrie

  10. I’m more concerned about those things he signed into law, because I don’t recognize any of those bills. Thanks, like I wanted to research these not-so-new ways my life is getting screwed over.

    1. Fred, those bills were on the internet for you to read for a full five days before they were voted on. The Chosen One promised as much.

      1. Five days is insufficient for me to read thousands upon thousands of pages of gobbledygook.

        1. I agree, and I don’t think he’s done this with even one bill. Madame Pelosi was just stating administration policy when she said we’d have to pass Obamacare to see what was in it.

        2. Five days is insufficient for me to read thousands upon thousands of pages of gobbledygook.

          If you’re gonna quote Nancy Pelosi, you should at least cite her.

          1. I was paraphrasing. Booyah!

    2. The best part of putting the bills on there is that it presupposes that the new laws are any good.

      1. “Accomplishment,” “Atrocity.” You say “po-ta-to”…

  11. “10/30/09 People with HIV/AIDS no longer prohibited from entering the United States”

    What the fuck? Isn’t the exclusion of people with transmittable diseases ONE OF THE ACTUALLY VALID PURPOSES OF HAVING FUCKING BORDERS?!

    1. You know who else wanted to keep people with communicable diseases out of his country…

      1. general westmoreland?

      2. George W. Bush?

    2. My fucking god. Seriously? How did I not hear about this?

      1. Because of all the shit to worry about, this seems like nothing. Priorities!

    3. We should just break down the list by which Horsemen it serves (Famine gets poverty and economic disfunction).

      1. They are all there to serve The Nature Boy, Ric Flair! Whoooooooooooooooo!!!!!!

    4. You DO know we ALREADY have people with HIV/AIDS in the country, right?

      1. We have people with tuberculosis, West Nile and MRSA too, but we still screen immigrants for them because we don’t want a lot more of them.

  12. Obama 2012 for Assassin-in-Chief. He kills foreigners and American citizens with equal impunity.

    1. But how are his parkour skills? That seems to be necessary to be a good assassin.

      1. That’s where the in-Chief part comes in. He just sits back and takes the credit while someone else has the hard task of remotely bombing indistinct figures with unknown identities.

  13. The glaring omission of this list is the complete American Middle Class and all the American soldiers that died in Iraq, Afghanistan and all the other bullshit wars that Obama is so proud of.
    Obama got the Nobel Peace Prize for what exactly?

  14. Does it make me a bad libertarian and/or racist that I really don’t give one shit about any of the foreign terrorists Obama has bumped off except to the extent that it demonstrates his hypocrisy compared to his campaign rhetoric? I mean al Awlaki was one thing since he was an American, but if Obama wants to use the blanket powers congress granted the president in the Authorization to Use Military Force Against Terrorists to go blow Achmed al Zubi von Halalalalalal of Al Qaeda branch #0734 into bits all over the middle east, I have to admit that it really doesn’t break my heart.

  15. If Obama gets 4 more years we’ll probably see “Joe Thomas in Omaha” killed by a drone added to the list too. In all fairness we’ll probably see it on Romney’s kill list too.

  16. Obama have a long plan for this bill in the future.

  17. That would make Barack Obama a “cowboy” or “gunslinger”, right? Surely there must be many media articles and protest marches condemning these deaths?

  18. Peace prize? More like Pieces Prize. Oh look, I found an ear…

  19. 3/17/11 US drone strike kills Din Mohammed, 25; and Khanay Khan, 40, who were two complete fucking nobodies who just happened to be standing around.


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