A.M. Links: Google Helps Chinese Users Avoid Censored Keywords, Venezuela Bans Private Gun Ownership, the FDA Seeks to Secure Drug for Executions, State of Emergency Expires in Egypt, Eurozone Unemployment at Record High.

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  1. Under the new law, only the army, police and certain groups like security companies will be able to buy arms from the state-owned weapons manufacturer and importer.

    The ban is the latest attempt by the government to improve security and cut crime ahead of elections in October

    Yeah, that’s what it is.

    1. Free and fair elections monitored by Harry Belafonte and Sean Penn.

      1. If Hugo Chavez dies before the election, which is likely, what happens then? Is there a line of succession, or will it be no-holds-barred chaos?

        Seriously, this is a chance for the Venezuelan people to actually become free. I hope there are some dissidents that wll return and bring some sanity to that country. There is so much there to offer. It’d be a shame for it to continue its death spiral.

        1. A short period of chaos among the upper ranks of the Chavista players followed by brutal crackdown on dissidents.

        2. You don’t get to the position of power that Chavez has without a line of cronies right behind you. I’m willing to bet the succession has already been decided.

        3. Guys like chavez are a product of culture. He wouldnt be where he is if he didnt have the sympathy of the majority there. It will be a ‘meet the new boss…’ situation when chavez goes to feed the worms. Every latin country I have been to has been populated by a vast majority of socialist minded ( envious) peons.

          It is too easy for a thug to use obamaish politics of envy to rise to power in places like that. What is frightening is that obama has had as much success as he has with those tactics here.

          1. You see the same thing in African countries too–some warlord comes into power as “the voice of the people!” and the situation doesn’t really change at all.

            1. Same with Marion Barry, hero of Ward 8. While he’s eating at The Palm every day, his supporters are struggling along in the tumbleweeds and ganglands of Anacostia.

          2. Statism is the natural instinct of human groupings. Liberty is the unnatural aberration, and if we let things fall as they may it will always go back to statist equilibrium.

            1. what Rhonda implied I am stunned that anybody can make $674 in 1 weeks on the computer. have you seen this web link http://goo.gl/BZouC

    2. Not a word about Chavez’s demonstrated effotrs to establish complete power over his society. Nary a mention of otger famous regimes that have used complete civilian disarmament as a strategic part of establishing a totalitarian state.

      1. Like Chicago?

      2. If you’re expecting the BBC to not be hilariously slanted on certain topics, well, don’t hold your breath.

  2. In March of this year a US district judge upheld a case brought by 21 prisoners on death row who argued that the FDA didn’t have the right to allow prisons to import the drug without ensuring that it would work effectively.

    However under pressure from many of the 33 states that use the lethal injection method, the FDA is appealing that ruling.

    Probably the first time today’s FDA is rushing a drug to market under questionable testing and it’s something like this.

    1. Has the FDA tested the safety and efficacy of hanging?

      1. How about a bullet?

        1. How ’bout consulting a pharmacologist and using a substitute drug, duh.

          1. They can’t use barbiturates, since there’s no antidote for an OD in humans.

            1. And why would you need an antidote for an intentional overdose?

              1. I’m guessing that that was a joke.

                1. You win a Kewpie doll, Icy!

                  1. D’oh!

                    Seriously, thought, that sounds exactly like the sort of idiotic reasoning that would go into using the current cocktail, instead of just a massive overdose of barbituates.

                    I’ve had dogs put down with the massive overdose of barbituates, and I can’t imagine a more humane way to go. They’re gone before the syringe is empty.

                    1. As an aside, my pharma prof swore he would immediately FAIL any student that pronounced barbiturate (bar-be-CHUR-ate) like how you spell it (bar-BITCH-you-ate), RC.

                      Medical Fun Fact: Because there is no antidote for a barb OD, that is why there is limited to no medical reason to RX them anymore and was the reason for formulating benzodiazapines.

                    2. An we rarely even see seizure disorder patients on phenobarb anymore. Too risky, blood monitoring is a pain, and enough effective alternatives.

                    3. “They’re gone before the syringe is empty.”

                      One of life’s worst moments.

        2. Danger of lead poisoning.

          1. They could pass large quantities of electricity through their bodies. That might work.

  3. Google has started offering suggestions to Chinese users that will help them avoid entering censored keywords into the search engine.

    Don’t be evil… eventually.

    1. Google’s List

      1. That’s a Spielberg movie I would pay to see.

  4. Jenny McCarthy looks her age.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/uss…..kline.html

    1. Spending your time trying to make sure kids get sick and die will age you.

      1. That look really doesn’t age well. At the gym near us there are a lot of toned middle-aged cougars with implants who look great from behind, but yikes!! when you see their faces. Cavernous, bony, stressed by over-use of plastic surgery and botox. Make-up actually making it look much worse in a Phantom of the Opera way.

        Interestingly, many “average-looking” women who don’t follow this route can actually become more attractive in their 40s and 50s. I work with a bunch.

        By the way, Jenny McCarthy is dating Brian Urlacher, so I better not be too disparaging of her. But I wish she would stop her anti-vaccination crusade, especially because her son “doesn’t have autism anymore” (which likely means he didn’t have it in the first place).

        1. But I wish she would stop her anti-vaccination crusade, especially because her son “doesn’t have autism anymore” (which likely means he didn’t have it in the first place).

          The autistic community certainly would be down with that.

        2. I never pictured Urlacher as being a guy who would accept sloppy 274ths.

          1. I always pictured him that way.

    2. But that’s part of Jenny McCarthy’s charm.

      To quote barfman: *barf*

    3. Everyone looks their age.

      1. I don’t! /man in back of crowd

        1. Me either.

    4. I’m older than she is and hope I don’t look that rough.

  5. Mila Kunis has gained almost enough weight to be considered attractive by John’s standards.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/uss…..-role.html

    1. She appears to be female so that takes her off your menu. But the face. She is just not very pretty.

      1. Before she gained enough weight to be on John’s menu.
        http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs…..azine.html

        1. She wasn’t very pretty. And it doesn’t appear that she has gained much weight. She is just not poured into a dress in the first pics.

          1. Not a big fan of That Seventies Show I see.

            1. Whatever happened to the red haired chick with the enormous bazongas? Made this chick look like a little girl.

              1. I think she had some show on NBC recently.

          2. I read somewhere that she lost a great deal of weight to do a movie where she played a ballerina.

            When she returned to her normal routine, the weight returned, but in different places.

        2. Uh huh. What John said.

        3. She’s not on my menu unless she’s soaked in satay overnight.

    2. She looks really hard in those pics. Not sure what is going on there.

      1. “Let the record reflect that the witness has made the ‘drinky-drinky’ motion.”

        1. Yeah. I was thinking alcohol plus being over 25.

          1. Wrong. Behold! THE BABOOSHKA GENE!

            (Mila Kunis is Ukrainian and of Russk descent.)

            1. And you’re moving to a place chock-full of babooshkas. Well, I wish you joy of it

              1. You kind folks have way too many poisonous critters and your toilets flush backwards.

                1. Plus, you’d have to change your name to Bruce.

                  1. Only if you’re a Dr. of Philosophy…

                    G’day, Bruce!

    3. Dat ass.

    4. I dont get yall. You post pictures and slobber over celebrity women who are mostly disfunctional narcissists when every junior college in america is chock full of girls who look better and have actual personalities. Hell I go out of my way to buy ciggarettes at a local convenience store because the cashier makes kunis look like a barker. And she is sweet as hell….you could pour honey on her and she wouldnt be any sweeter. ( That is my theory, but because I am not completely sure I would like to try it and see )

      1. I go out of my way to buy ciggarettes at a local convenience store because the cashier makes kunis look like a barker.

        This is why I “volunteer” to do the grocery shopping.

      2. Not everybody lives in the South. While this is true of pretty much every state that contains an SEC school, the north is a veritable wasteland.

        1. I was in the Ace hardware in Woodville, FL this weekend and the three HS girls they had as cashiers ranged from cute to smoking hot. One had a tattoo on her thigh that went up under her shorts, so I’m pretty sure she’s old enough I don’t have to feel bad about wanting to see the rest of the tatt.

      3. The Dutch girls ’round here don’t age so well. After 18, it’s downhill.

        Hell, the women I’ve been friends with for the past ~10 years started out from average to smoking hot. Now? They’re all pretty much fat, fat, fat.

        Having 1-2 kids + Carbs + too many late nights doesn’t help.

      4. I know I wrote this here recently but I’ve managed to engage 9s and 10s in the bars (maybe that was my probem there, upon reflection…) but they’re so often intellectual 3.5s that I want to stab them in the eye with a cocktail fork after about the first two minutes.

        A lid for every pot, I guess!

      5. You post pictures and slobber over celebrity women who are mostly disfunctional narcissists when every junior college in america is chock full of girls who look better and have actual personalities.

        I promise you those women at the junior college are just as narcissistic as the celebrity tarts in the Daily Fail. Just ask them how much they hate their female friends.

      6. I have to say, it’s damn nice working on a university campus, especially during the summer. 🙂

  6. Girl banned from prom for staying home after uncle dies. School officials stick to their authoritarian guns.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..-died.html

    1. Policies were followed. Seriously, tar and feather a couple of these officious fucks and see if they don’t become less stuck on their policies.

    2. Last I looked that was called an excused absence, as in your parents called the school and said you wouldn’t be there. That is the really disturbing thing about this. It is not that they ban kids who skip school from the prom. It is apparently the school has decided that it and not parents decide what is a good reason to miss school.

      The only answer to this is for angry parents to administer a few beatings to school officials.

      1. I took my kids both out of school early a couple of weeks ago so we could go out of town. The lady at the desk at my daughter’s school asked me why I was taking her out, and I told her because I wanted to. She told me that wasn’t a good enough reason. I asked her what was a good enough reason and she said for an appointment. I told her it was for an appointment then. She got all huffy with me and started in about “taking” my daughter. I made sure she knew it was my daughter and that why I pull her out of school is none of her business. And I refused to list a reason on the sign out log.

        At my son’s school, it was the opposite. I walked in the office and told them I was taking my son to Six Flags for the day. The ladies there just said not to tell the kids in his class (they let me walk back and get him myself since the kids all know me from coaching their track team), lest they get jealous. The schools are 100 yards apart.

        So not only are the rules arbitrary, they are arbitrarily enforced.

        1. I think there is a reason why I haven’t had kids. It is God’s way of keeping me out of prison. The woman at your daughter’s school needs her ass kicked.

          1. I nearly got arrested once for taking my son out of school…not for taking him out but for slamming the principal’s office door hard enough to crack the glass in it. I took him out permanently and neither one of us went back.

            1. I took him out permanently and neither one of us went back.

              Your child or the principal?

              1. Wondered same thing. Actually, that might be what it takes down the road to remind the dingbat educational authorities that they work for us!

            2. Thanks for the link to the hog hunting ranch. I seriously may have to do that.

              And you are right, cooking game is an art that sadly died with your grandmothers.

        2. he lady at the desk at my daughter’s school asked me why I was taking her out,

          “Fuck you, that’s why” would have been an awesome response.

          1. Assuming you had your monocle and tophat, “Because she is my property, not yours” might have been worth a go.

            1. I almost want to have a child just so I can do this one day. Almost.

          2. Even better, “You see these fists, they’re getting ready to fuck you up”.

        3. What happens if they decide you don’t have a good enough reason?
          Do they call the cops for your trying to remove your child from a government facility?

          1. Pretty much. Not sending your child to school is a crime.

            1. Funny. I considered sending your child to government education camp, er, school, a crime.

              1. It is getting that way. The people I know who home school, have kids that seem way more normal and thoughtful than the ones who don’t.

                1. Public schools teach kids that being thoughtful is bad.

                  Obey and accept. Do not think.

                  1. Public schools teach kids that being thoughtful is bad.

                    Obey and accept. Do not think.

                    ^^THIS^^

                    Unfortunately, universities are following suit. At least in the humanities colleges.

                  2. As Cavanaugh pointed out a few weeks ago in his CA Ed write-up, this is actually a useful skill in the, well, world we live in now.

        4. The lady at the desk at my daughter’s school asked me why I was taking her out…

          If you’re polite, and I assume you are, you probably wouldn’t want to lead with it but you missed a golden opportunity to drop the reason.com all purpose response….

          FUCK YOU THAT’S WHY.

          Sigh.

        5. If this ever happens to me, I think my reason will be “I’m withdrawing her, yall just aren’t doing a good enough job”. Then if I need to re-enroll her, so be it.

  7. Paparazi follow Ali Larter for third day in a row.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs…..horts.html

    1. That’s a pretty tame look for her. I’ve been a huge Ali Larter for a while. She does look good for having had a child, though.

    2. She looks pretty cute, I’d say.

  8. Woman breaks into home, cleans it, and leaves a bill. Police charge her with burglery even though nothing was taken.
    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..es-75.html

    1. I’d love it if someone broke into my home and cleaned it. Heck, I’d even pay the bill.

      1. ^So much this! That would be a dream come true!

    2. even though nothing was taken.

      What about the pride that comes from keeping a clean home?

      1. “Who took all my dust?”

    3. Well,in a lot of states you don’t actually have to take anything for it to be a burglary, you just have to break in and intend to commit a crime inside. But apparently in Ohio it’s also burglary if you break into a house and someone else is present. That being said, the Ohio burglary statute is retarded.

      1. Many things in Ohio are retarded. The alcohol cap on beer, the politicians, and Orrin.

      2. In CA I believe if you break into a home and someone is present, it is ROBBERY, which is a significantly worse charge (equivalent to rape and just below murder/kidnapping)

  9. In New York calling someone gay is no longer slander.
    The New York decision finds that the comment is now “based on a false premise that it is shameful and disgraceful to be described as lesbian, gay or bisexual.”
    http://www.nytimes.com/aponlin…..l?_r=2hp;

    1. That’s so gay

    2. you’re gay! We’re gay!

      1. “Maybe you all are homo-sex-uals!”

    3. What about calling someone a fag? If so, they need to start arresting everyone with internet access.

    4. Is “No homo” acceptable?

  10. “You have made too many comments. Please try again later.”

    1. “Shut up”, the squirrels explained.

    1. First of all, calling Mesquite a metropolitan area is a pretty big stretch. Second of all, dude should definitely go to trial on this. No way they can find 12 to convict. Finally, he should run for police chief — or if that’s not an elected position, mayor.

    2. Note to self: keep one gun loaded with blanks.

      1. Note to self:

        Fire warning shots into head and chest of anyone breaking into house.

        1. The funny thing is, if he had actually shot an intruder, they probably wouldn’t have arrested him.

          I’ll bet they didn’t believe there was an actual intruder.

    3. The Mesquite Police Department, who were not present during the attempted break-in, said in a statement: “The man and his family were in no immediate danger. Firing a warning shot was unnecessary and reckless.”

      They were not there but they just know he wasn’t in immediate danger. And firing a gun into the ground is “reckless”. He should definitely go to trial.

    4. Police penalizing a non-LEO for firing a gun in an ‘unnecessary and reckless’ manner is pretty rich.

    1. That’s messed up.

      1. What do you mean? Dude prolly took it to some girl who has been telling him he’s too poor to date and got his brains screwed out.

        1. He forgot the charger!

    2. One vibrator to rule them all

  11. Obama gives Presidential medal of Freedom to Bob Dylan.

    But wait, there’s more!

    Obama says he (Obama, not Dylan) probably knows more about Judaism than any previous president. (including, apparently, predecessors who spoke Hebrew).

    But that’s not all…

    Obama also says that he had so many “Jewish friends” in Chicago that he was accused of being with the Israeli lobby (“But Rev. Wright was probably just kidding”).

    http://ow.ly/bhN9N

    1. Obama is tight with the Tribe. Moreso than any mainline Protestant that believes in that Book of Revelation Apocalypse bullshit where Jesus pulls the guts from all the Jews when he returns.

      1. Yeah, he is real tight with Jews, that explains his love of Israel.

        Fuck off and go troll somewhere else.

        1. Ahh, so I offend you John Hagee Armageddon fetishism types? Good. Israel is not some fantasy abattoir land for your weird religion.

          1. Other than your repulsive existence, nothing about you is offensive Shreik. Pathetic but not offensive.

          2. Palins Buttplug? What happened shreek Warren Buffet finally evict you from his rectum?

      2. It looks likely that the Irish have voted “yes” in the referendum on the European Fiscal Compact.

        Oh Shrieky, what was Intrade’s odds on this happening?

        1. It appears they didn’t run a market. Pity, the retards on Intrade would have been taken to the cleaners on that one.

      3. Needs more christfag.

      4. So, does that make Obama a Christfag?

      5. “where Jesus pulls the guts from all the Jews when he returns.”

        [citation needed]

    2. Aaaah, I thought that was an elderly lesbian social worker

    3. Holy shit. The dude really does have narcissism of a borderline personality disorder.

      1. ‘You know what? If I keep this up, in 2012 I could get a medal in the White House from a guy named Barack Obama. That wasn’t in the plan. But that’s exactly what makes this award so special,” Obama said.

        Self-referential while giving an award to someone else, I’m beginning to think you’re right.

      2. Actually, just Narcissistic Personality Disorder. But he got that bad.

        1. I won’t be constrained by your DSM.

          1. Hmm, Paranoid Personality Disorder.

          2. You can just say “Cluster B” which includes both borderline and narcissistic, and is easily understood by most who deal with mental illness. However, on last report, the DSM-V is only going to have ‘personality disorder’ and not break them down.

            The nitwit publication can have such impossibilities as “hallucinogen dependence” but won’t give you a choice among the different personality disorders anymore.

            By the way, narcissists and borderlines often date each other. They complement well.

    4. Obama gives Presidential medal of Freedom to Bob Dylan.

      Also, the inevitable one for (snore) Toni Morrison – now that he got the inevitable one for Maya Angelou out of the way last year.

    5. ‘I have jewish friends’. Is that anything like saying ‘I have black friends.’ or ‘gay friends’?

      1. “Some of my best beers are dark!”

    6. I thought Zimmy was a Christian now?

      I gave up after “Slow Train Coming” so I’m probably wrong.

  12. College student arrested for building bombs during ATF raid

    wait, she was building the bombs during the raid?

    anyways: http://www.wsbtv.com/news/news…..atf/nPJSg/

    Savage said his daughter’s not a militia member but she shares his dislike of government.

    “The government, don’t have a whole lot of use for,” Savage said. “I think everybody ought to be able to stay on their property, do whatever the heck they want to.”

    Savage confirms she’s in a YouTube video where she exploded a commode.

    The ATF agent’s statement suggests Savage told an FBI agent she likes to blow up toilets in the woods.

    1. The ATF agent’s statement suggests Savage told an FBI agent she likes to blow up toilets in the woods.

      Who doesn’t? Seriously.

      1. As a proud member of the Sierra Club, I only blow up my toilets at the city dump.

      2. I too blow up toilets.

        But it normally isn’t that fun, and it’s never in the woods.

    2. What’s their problem? Better than cherry bombing the school toilet.


    3. “I despise all law enforcement and any governing authority. I am not one for selective targeting but mass destruction,”

      Are we missing any commenters?

      1. There was an erstwhile commenter named SIV. He suddenly disappeared.

        1. I was just defying the ampersand ban.

          1. Oh! There you are! Some scullerous knave was defaming your good name!

    4. Is it wrong to think she looks a lot cuter than I expected?

      1. She’s a bit ‘neck, but who doesn’t want a girl who likes to shoot, skydive, blow shit up, and hates the gummint?

        1. And getting ass-raped in the sky.

      2. Is it wrong that I never thought about her cuteness but immediately went back in check once you mentioned it?

        However. Do not want.

        1. Other than her reckless use of social media she’s just about perfect.

      3. Cute, shoots, blows shit up. I could eat that with a spoon. Damn….where was she when I was single?

        1. .where was she when I was single?

          My guess would be Middle School you filthy pervert.

          /sarc

    5. That’s why you should always be mindful of what you put on Facebook!

      1. Yes. I learned from an early age that pictures, videos, and writing were evidence. Never let damning ones survive.

    6. A sworn statement by an ATF agent said she illegally possessed a destructive device and possessed firearms while being an illegal drug user.

      So owning a gun if you’ve ever smoked weed is now a federal crime?

      1. When you buy a firearm you swear on the 4473 that you are not a “habitual user” of marijuana.

        1. But what if you later become one?

      2. I seem to recall they busted some guy with an MMJ license a few months back and took all his guns. So, yeah, that’s how they’re playing it in Neu America.

      3. Has been since Gun Control Act of ’68, I believe, and totally wasn’t aimed at radicals and Black Panther types who smoked pot and carried guns.

      4. Only if you are the wrong sort of person.

  13. San Francisco Sheriff and wife both upset that video showing her after he abused her is being released to the public.

    Oddly enough, he wasn’t arrested on the spot for domestic violence. But I’m sure that was just an oversight and not a double-standard.

    1. Lopez, according to a neighbor she confided in, appeared ready to report the incident to police on Jan. 4, but then decided not to. The seeming change of heart came after Lopez received a nearly 40-minute phone call from her husband’s campaign manger, Linnette Peralta Haynes, who also has domestic violence counseling training. Haynes’ attorney, Eric Safire, said the call involved an evaluation on whether or not Lopez was in danger.

      An evaluation of whether or not the sheriff’s campaign was in danger. Convenient that his campaign manager has domestic violence counseling under her belt.

    2. Correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t domestic violence one of those charges that the victim has to agree to press charges?

      1. Nope. Just the opposite. Because women can’t be trusted to stand up for themselves.

      2. Nope, in many states DV is a “Must arrest” charge. The cops show up and if either partner alleges that the other assaulted them, there is an arrest. Sometimes of both parties.

      3. Nope. If there is physical evidence of DV, the cops are forced to arrest somebody. These bruises and her statement on the video would be enough evidence to get anybody else tossed in the slam overnight.

    3. Nothing else happened

  14. The Ballad of Little Adolf Hitler Campbell

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..-back.html

  15. Obama Tells Donors More Time Needed on Health Care
    http://topics.bloomberg.com/barack-obama/

    Bloomberg’s Hans Nichols reports that President Barack Obama is confiding to Democratic donors that he may have to revisit the health-care issue in a second term, a position at odds with his publicly expressed confidence that the U.S. Supreme Court will uphold the Affordable Care Act, according to three Democratic activists. He speaks on Bloomberg Television’s “Inside Track.”

    1. Just give him one more chance. It is not like he fuck up any worse right?

      1. “C’mon Charlie Brown, this time I promise I won’t move the football.”

        1. “I promise I’ll pull out in time!”

          1. “Just the tip”

            1. “Just the tip”

              “Of the iceberg.”

              1. If that’s what you want to call yours, I’m not here to judge.

                1. Pssst. Brett…Silver Fox is a girl.

                  1. you know in the world of the inter-tubez.

                  2. What? I thought women hated HR because we were insensitive assholes who objectify their looks and toss around the word “cunt”.

                    1. we were insensitive assholes who objectify their looks and toss around the word “cunt”

                      But that’s like, the best part of HnR!

  16. Greek exit from the Euro compared to vomiting up a bad kebab – Greeks not amused

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/new…..ozone.html

    1. Greek exit from the Euro compared to vomiting up a bad kebab Santorum – Greeks not amused excited

      1. That humored me. So what does this make the score? Greece out, Ireland in. The Irish have a bit of a history doing stuff like that. Think of the millions who came to the US…only to die fighting in the Civil War a few years later. Erin Go Bra!! (or something like that)

        1. Apparently, the Irish like the impending sense of doom.

  17. After Recount, Republican’s Opponent Concedes a State Senate Race in Brooklyn
    http://www.nytimes.com/2012/06……html?_r=3

    “It’s really very exciting,” Mr. Storobin said Thursday. “Not only as the first Republican to win in a long time, but as the first Russian-American, and as a Russian Jew, knowing that I could never do much in the Soviet Union.”

    Mr. Storobin, a lawyer, came to the United States with a single mother when he was 12, and settled in Brooklyn without speaking English. “Early in this race, when people were telling me, ‘You won’t win,’ I said, ‘Look, I have heard this all my life,’ ” he said.

    A Republican in Brooklyn? *faints*

    1. Maybe the fucking hipsters are good for something if they can drive Brooklynites to vote Republican.

      1. They voted Republican ironically.

        1. I was thinking that real Brooklynites figured out that Republicans are a natural enemy of hipsters and voted accordingly, hoping that the hipsters would be unable to bear the shame of being thus represented and flee like roaches to some other borough.

      2. It’s the 27th district – which has Brighton Beach and Sheepshead Bay. A Russian winning is not a surprise. That’s not hipster Brooklyn.

        1. Apparently, you’re wrong–

          “It’s really very exciting,” Mr. Storobin said Thursday. “Not only as the first Republican to win in a long time, but as the first Russian-American, and as a Russian Jew, knowing that I could never do much in the Soviet Union.”

  18. I’m watching QI! with Stephen Fry, which is absolutely imperative viewing material, and I have noticed something.

    Rich Hall looks exactly like a slightly older, harder drinking version of his Jacketood.

    It is known.

    1. Dutiful Dothraki repetition:

      It is known.

  19. The Obama Campaign Is Worried About Money
    http://thehill.com/homenews/ad…..d-cash-now

    President Obama’s campaign team and top supporters are telling donors they need to get off the sidelines now so they can compete with GOP super-PACS waging an expected $1 billion campaign against them.

    The deluge of cash from outside groups backing Republican Mitt Romney has prompted a sense of urgency among Obama’s supporters. Their message to donors is simple: Send money now.

    1. Their message to donors is simple: Send money now.

      But I thought that using metric ass-loads of money to win elections was going to bring the downfall of democracy?

      1. But I thought that using metric ass-loads of money to win elections was going to bring the downfall of democracy?

        But I thought that Republicans using metric ass-loads of money to win elections was going to bring the downfall of democracy democrats?

        Now the sentence stands.

    2. But I thought the Republicans spending a billion dollars was just a sign of how evil they are.

  20. Those a-holes in Europe get to watch Prometheus this weekend, while I have to watch countless reviews of Snow White and the Huntsman. My God has truly forsaken me.

    1. All hail Ripley! Warrior goddess of the Terrans. (I know she isn’t in Prometheus, but still…)

      1. Ripley was awesome, and I suspect this will be a good film too, but I have to wonder what is up with Charlize when she does something epic like a Ridley Scott Alien universe movie with other big female leads, then does a film like Snow White with Kristen Stewart. Bills gots ta be paid I guess.

      2. I agree. I can’t wait for Prometheus. I will prolly check out Snow White in the next couple of days, but cuurently I am pondering whether or not to take my 10-year-old daughter to The Avengers as well. Not sure it is up her alley (but I sure want to see it).

        1. I think Snow White looks good.

  21. York: On wrong side of issues, Obama avoids Wisc.
    http://campaign2012.washington…..isc/573441

    Last year, when angry protesters filled the streets of Madison, Wis., denouncing Gov. Scott Walker’s plan to curtail some union collective bargaining powers, President Obama was eager to associate himself with the union cause. “Some of what I’ve heard coming out of Wisconsin, where they’re just making it harder for public employees to collectively bargain generally, seems like more of an assault on unions,” Obama told a Milwaukee TV reporter in February 2011.

    Now, it’s just days until voters decide whether to recall Walker — an effort started, maintained and financed by the unions. If the polls are correct, Walker, who is being challenged by Milwaukee Mayor Tom Barrett, seems headed toward keeping his job. And now, the president is not only no longer talking about Wisconsin, he’s actually seeking to distance himself from next week’s likely Democratic defeat.

    1. Last year, when angry protesters filled the streets of Madison, Wis., denouncing Gov. Scott Walker’s plan to curtail some union collective bargaining powers, President Obama was eager to associate himself with the union cause.

      Of course he was–it was his campaign machine stoking the chimpouts, after all.

  22. Google has started offering suggestions to Chinese users that will help them avoid entering censored keywords into the search engine.

    A billion new people are introduced to l33tspeak. The world has seen better days.

    1. OT: Do other languages have such a foreign dialect on the internet as English does?

      I mean, if one didn’t use the internet frequently, I can see how they could easily become confused between all of the random abbreviations and acronyms available to use.

      1. Yes, Russk does have it’s own brand of Cyrillic L33T-Speak.

    2. Dude, how the fuck do you make LOLCATS into Engrish?

  23. It looks likely that the Irish have voted “yes” in the referendum on the European Fiscal Compact.

    I’m pretty sure the Irish are used to things looking a little hazy the morning after.

    1. “We did what?”

    2. I look forward to the IRA bombing campaign in Brussels when they realize that they just turned over a big chunk of their sovereignty to the EU.

      1. Just thinking about the narratives that would spring forth from that makes my head spin.

    1. Everyone always kills Hitler on their first trip.

  24. After thirty-one years Egypt’s State of Emergency law expires.

    No worries. There are plenty more laws where that came from.

  25. Venezuela bans private gun ownership.

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/worl…..a-18288430

    1. FTA:

      Hugo Chavez’s government says the ultimate aim is to disarm all civilians, but his opponents say the police and government may not have the capacity or the will to enforce the new law.

      1. You know who else disarmed all civilians?

        1. The RUF in Sierra Leonne?

          1. +1. LOL

        2. Chicago?

          1. it’s a hell of a town!

          1. Michael – You can have my soda when you pry it from my cold dead hand – Bloomberg

            Oh sorry, we were talking about what kind of control again?

      2. He’s just sad that the cancer isn’t going to let him build up a true legacy, like what Mugabe has.

    2. Directly competing with an officially posted morning link. Ballsy.

      1. Yeah not sure how the fugg I missed that. Oh well, give me a break, I’m new.

        1. Are you Irish?

          1. Lebanese.

            1. You had to have read the comments above – never mind.

      2. The fact that no one noticed but you shows how much attention people give to the “official” links.

  26. Surprise, Surprise, Surprise! Jobs numbers “unexpectedly” low.

    1. Additionally, the media freaks out when there’s even a chance the numbers will be high, which is not exactly what you would do if you were expecting them.

    2. and Ben B slowly accumulates the data he needs to support dropping more money from helicopters…

      1. That fictitious helicopter drop really worries the Beckerhead types. I would think goldbugs would welcome get little erections on such news instead of constant lament.

        1. Could someone translate that from Derp to English?

          1. Shriek Spiek: “The Fed was within it’s fiduciary duty and Glenn Beck gold purchasers should be happy with a weaker dollar.”

            1. Impressive, Dr. Groovus. Good work.

      2. I’m sure it will work as well as the other ones.

      3. That would do more actual good than the crony handouts that really occurred.

      4. I think Benny is keeping an eye on gasoline futures. When those have dropped enough that he can stop worrying that his next printing spree won’t push gas over $4.00/gallon, the safety will be off, and he’ll start printing if the stock market takes another leg down.

    3. I’d love to see a chronological list of all the “unexpectedly” headlines over the past few years

  27. One of the qualities that makes Lindy West so much funnier than any man? Why it’s scolding people for finding something funny that is supposed to be serious and off-limits.

    The key to successful comedy is self-censorship on a broad range of taboo topics. Rigid boundaries are hilarious! Timidity is hilarious!

    Trigger Warning: Concern trolling and smug levels at toxic level in 2nd link.

    1. In general, I need you to stop talking to me about zombies, vampires, werewolves, unicorns, bacon, cupcakes, Chuck Norris if that’s still happening, and “I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.” Stop. Make a new thing.

      Why is she othering the poor who don’t have constant access to the internet and will probably find the above things hilarious for a while?

      1. New meme: Here

        1. Again, going straight to hell (for those times I am not already there), but I laughed.

      2. Fuck her (insert obligatory Fuck Off, Slaver” here). I like talking about all those things. If she doesn’t want to talk about them, she doesn’t have to.

      3. Interestingly/ hypocritically, Jezebel takes a concern-trolling story about how we shouldn’t find gallows humor in the situation, and illustrates it with a funny pic. Oh Jezebel.

      4. Besides, the guy probably didn’t actually eat the other guy’s face. That would be gross.

      5. Jesus. As much contempt as I have for nerd fetishes and obsessions, this manatee is far worse–a shrill, loveless, perpetually miserable cunt who’s trying to make the rest of the world as miserable as her. The “I’m funnier than you” article is a great example of what a Dunning-Kruger head case she is.

      6. Why does she put the onus of creating a new “thing” on everyone else? Is she not funny or creative enough to do it herself?

      7. Aside from bacon, I wish people would stop talking about those things all the time too.

      8. But at least she’s honestly expressing her needs instead of projecting those onto others. That’s an uncommon level of honesty and self awareness for that crowd (and for a few here).

    2. Ah, so Jezebel has joined the coverup.

      1. THAT’S NOT FUNNY! THIS IS A VERY SERIOUS SUBJECT! CAN’T YOU SEE I HAVE MY NOT-FUNNY GRIMACE ON!

        SEE HOW HILARIOUS I AM?!?

        1. The reign of radical right wing financial policy in Washington State has left (the richest of) us with some of the lowest tax burdens of any community in the United States. The cost is a day like today.

          IT’S NOT FUNNY! IT’S MUCH MORE USEFUL AS A POLITICAL CUDGEL!

        2. Actually, I thought the rubber chicken wearing the pink apron pic was hilarious and remarkably self-deprecating in its irony.

          1. One glimmer of self-awareness does not a comedian make.

            On behalf of the funny people of the world of all genders and races, Lindy West sickens me. She’s where humor goes to shit itself to death in an airport bathroom.

            1. In her case, I think it’s where humor goes to suffocate under rolls of fatty tissue.

              1. That’s not fat. it’s humor reserves. That’s why she’s so much funnier than any man.

                Humor reserves!

                1. Hey! She’s wearing my Grandma’s couch!

                  1. It’s been proven by a panel of very important wimmin scientists that mugging for a camera is the single funniest thing a carbon-based life form can ever aspire to do.

                    Mug, ladies! MUG! Look to the amazing and always funny Jenny McCarthy and Nicki Minaj for inspiration.

                    FUNNY. EVERY. TIME.

        3. I don’t get why so many people are incapable of seeing that things can be funny and bad at the same time. Eating a guys face off is funny. It is also horrifying and not doubt completely awful for the person getting his face eaten. But that makes it no less funny.

    3. Yesterday in Seattle (where I live)

      I can’t believe it’s not Portland.

      1. Portland doesn’t have the gravitas for an unbounded wit like Lindy West.

    4. http://jezebel.com/people/lindywest/

      You should check out her rants on fat tolerance and acceptance. Something tells me fat jokes are off the table as well.

      1. I’m still on the fence about fat acceptance, but she states her case well.

        1. People can be as fat as the fuck they want. Just don’t expect my acceptance to include finding them attractive or being sympathetic.

        2. Jesus Christ. It’s framed as a moral failing and societal ruin everywhere all the time. I didn’t make that up. And no, it is not “apt” to compare PEOPLE’S BODIES to alcoholism or meth addiction. That’s unbelievably offensive

          I think she misses the point. She says fat is OK, but alcoholism and meth addiction are moral failings that should be judged. If you’re going to judge people based on their behavior, then it must be applied equally in order for it to be logically consistent.

          1. No, no, Scruffy… what you don’t understand is that alcoholism and meth addiction doesn’t occur in PEOPLE’S BODIES, so it’s OK to criticize them.

            1. No, no, Scruffy… what you don’t understand is that alcoholism and meth addiction doesn’t occur in PEOPLE’S BODIES she isn’t an alcoholic or meth addict, so it’s OK to criticize them.

            2. Really? Oh crap, I’ve been doing it wrong!

          2. A healthy waistline is a social construct.

          3. Pound.Head.On.Desk. has reminded us several times that he has managed to control his weight by really taking control of his diet.

            HHe sure seems to think that it’s “in his body.”

          4. Wonder if she supports Obamacare.

      2. But telling fat people that they’re “not okay” will never cause fat people to become thin. It will only make them miserable. And miserable people want Doritos.

        So it’s all our fault you’re fat then? It’s not your self-esteem issues and your use of food to make you feel better at play here?

        Wow.

        1. A fat woman refuses to take responsibility for the state of her being? What a surprise!

        2. And bonus points for slipping that product placement in under their radar.

        3. Funny. I’ve found the same thing about people with substance abuse issues.

          Humiliation is not an effective tool at changing behavior. Or, at least, not typically in the way that you’d assumed.

          1. Humiliation is not an effective tool at changing behavior. Or, at least, not typically in the way that you’d assumed.

            True, but I doubt she’s using the word the way you and I might use it.

        4. Miserable people want lots of different things. Miserable drunks want alcohol. I doubt she would give them a free pass, though.

    5. A lot of people don’t think I’m funny. But enough people DO think I’m funny that they give me money to be funny. So unless people give you money to be funny, I am probably funnier than you. The end.

      I’m funny because people pay me to be funny. Since you don’t get paid to be funny, you aren’t funny. Therefore I’m funny and you aren’t.

      She looks like she’s still trying to eat through that giant chip on her shoulder. Apparently rage and indignation is extremely fattening.

      1. Interesting unintentional endorsement of good old fashioned free market capitalism, I’d say.

    6. any person yelling “GUYS, that’s NOT okay to joke about” is not a funny person, full stop.

      she’s the equivalent of a radio hole .

    7. I hope she’s funny….she certainly isn’t attractive.

    8. My DVR records Destroyed in Seconds every day. That shit is fucking hilarious.

      I mean, ‘cmon.

      I guess I’m just evil.

  28. Real Cherokees on the warpath for Limo Liberal Lizzie’s scalp.

    In a quip made by Brown Thursday, he said, “My parents told me a lot of things too, but it’s not accurate.”

    Warren said that quip crosses a line.

    1. She’s been microaggressed and she won’t stand for it.

    2. I guess Lizzie has never had to learn the universal truth that if you are in a hole, you should stop digging.

      1. Warren and her followers thrive on being indignant and offended. Any opportunity to portray themselves as the victim will be taken.

        1. Yeah, but somehow “I’m a victim because I got caught lying and gaming the ethnic spoils system” doesn’t seem the best use of the victim card.

          1. They’re not self-aware enough to see that.

        2. I bet Lindy West has contributed to her campaign

          1. She’s on the food committee.

  29. So… Chavez is about to kick the bucket and they ban firearm sale to civilians? Coincidence? Nope.

  30. ‘Retard doll’ shocks Swedish shoppers

    http://www.thelocal.se/41050/20120525/

    1. That’s not a retard doll, that’s the new Swedish line of gender-less dolls for every child. Neither male nor female and unattractive so as to not discriminate against the hideous.

      1. Ah, in celebration of their new androgynous pronoun. Now there’s some product merchandising.

        1. Couldn’t they have just avoided this whole controversy by labeling it the “Shrike doll”?

          1. When you push in on its stomach is yells “Christfag”

            1. Is the how you “play” with the doll the reason shreek adopted the new handle?

        2. Sorry John; didn’t see your comment.

        3. The new sexless pronoun should be “flurgen”. That’d be great.

    2. “She doesn’t swear, have sex, drink, or poop. So much better than a normal retard.”

      1. My inner retard laughed

  31. American employers in May added the smallest number of workers in a year and the unemployment rate unexpectedly increased as job-seekers re-entered the workforce, further evidence that the labor-market recovery is stalling.

    http://www.bloomberg.com/news/…..n-may.html

    1. I also walked down the steps this morning without requiring someone to push down on my body providing further evidence that gravity is in effect.

    2. unexpectedly

      Good for a laugh, every time. It’s almost reached “Fuck you, that’s why” status.

    3. They call it “Structural Unemployment” when a GOPer is president.

      1. That is why is was 5% under Bush. Shrike took the full dose of retard pills this morning.

        1. Bush was at -750,000 monthly job losses as he sauntered into the depths of history. +82,000 does not look so bad in comparison.

          1. It looks really bad when you consider Bush left at the begining or a recession and we are now year into the worst recovery in living memory.

            God you are stupid Shriek. When Obama loses this fall, can you do the world a favor and just kill yourself?

          2. If we’re gonna play this game, let’s play the whole thing out. Pick any 3.5 year stretch for Bush and put it against Obama and see if you can find a worse record for Bush. I’ll bet no. I can be definitively sure that May 2004 was not below +82,000 if you want to compare at same time in office.

          3. I saw this same argument on a newspaper forum–apparently job gains below the population growth rate is considered a “win” now.

            “I’M NOT GETTING MY ARM SAWED OFF ANYMORE, SO THIS FESTERING INFECTION DOESN’T SEEM TOO BAD!!!!”

        2. So they modeled the “retard doll” after him is what you’re saying. I’ll buy that.

    4. Hey, it’s better than when they were giving up looking…

    5. as job-seekers re-entered the workforce

      Oh shit! They’re going to foul the metrics!

      1. It’s OK. Obama’s already working on changing how they measure unemployment. Again.

  32. Nice try Tulpa, but us dyslexics are not fooled by your attempt to make money off Bailey’s trademark.

    We see right through you

    I hope you are cutting him in on the sales.

  33. Crude oil (WTI) down to $82/bl. It seems like just a few months ago all the wingnecks were certain inflation and Obama would push it past Dumbya’s $147/bl highs.

    1. Destroying demand by destroying the economy and Europe’s coming implosion is one way to do that.

      1. *ding*

        Demand decreases. Price decreases.

        how does the market work again, Shrikey??

      2. US production is much higher. Get your supply/demand facts right. We export record amounts of finished petro product.

        1. And demand is much lower. And production isn’t going to stay high if Obama gets his way.

          1. Nice try, John, but shrike is impervious to logic or facts. Or soap and shampoo, I would guess.

    2. I’d also like to note that a lot of the downward pressure on oil is only because the USD looks like a waaaay safer investment than the Euro right now, which prompts a higher valuation of the dollar.

      Of course, this is merely a speed bump in the path of inflation. Once the euro crumbles, the USD will resume its descent.

    1. Next time give us a warning when a site uses fucking Disqus comments.

      God damn memory hog, Disqus is.

  34. It looks likely that the Irish have voted “yes” in the referendum on the European Fiscal Compact.

    They don’t trust their own government. This is sort of like the mythical constitutional fix here in the U.S. When we think a problem is intractable, we advocate constitutional amendments or taking it to the Supreme Court in the hope that they’ll save us from our politicians somehow. In the EU, they apparently hope a higher power will save them, too.

    Interesting bit from that Reuters article:

    Those fears helped drive German bond yields to all-time lows, meaning investors are effectively paying Berlin to park their money in its coffers at negative interest rates while the borrowing costs of Spain and Italy are becoming prohibitive.

    http://www.reuters.com/article…..HI20120601

    German bonds are trading at negative interest rates. In a time of crisis, the market will pay Germany for the privilege of lending them money–while Italy and Spain are twisting in the wind, starving to death becasue they can’t afford to pay the market rate…

    …but the solution isn’t austerity?! People in Spain and Greece look at what the market’s charging them in interest–and look at what the market’s paying to Germany for the privilege of lending–and someone in Greece still thinks the solution isn’t austerity?!

    1. And people here think that US rates are low means they will stay that way forever no matter how badly we mismanages our budget. What were the rates on Greek and Spanish Bonds two years ago? There is no middle ground in this. People have confidence and will loan you money at low rates right up until the day they won’t. And when that happens, there is no going back.

      1. Okay, I don’t think it’ll keep all my parameters, here…

        http://www.bloomberg.com/quote/GGGB10YR:IND/chart

        But, if that takes you to the chart for the Greek 10 year, then in the box that says “? Add a comparison”, paste in “GDBR10:IND”, which is the German 10 year.

        That’s going back five years.

        1. Actually, you’ll need to click the “5Y” button to get it going out five years.

    2. But they’ve tried austerity and it has failed miserably. They should have spent more money on stimulus.

      /Krugman

  35. The Mexican ambassador to the United States on Thursday said a botched gun-tracking operation by America “poisoned” public opinion of the United States for the citizens of its southern neighbor.

    http://thehill.com/blogs/blog-…..nion-of-us

    Let’s see, Obama has fucked up our relationship with the UK, Israel, Poland and now Mexico. They don’t call it smart diplomacy for nothing. What is next, bragging to Canada about the American hold on the Stanley Cup?

    1. Well, to be fair, our relationship with The Limeys was tenuous before that.

      1. Not really. Bush slathered all over the Limeys. Obama came in and immediately shit all over them by being a philistine (giving the Queen and Ipod of his speeches) and his typical Daddy didn’t love me punk self, by giving back the Churchill bust.

        1. That’s true, but Blair got trounced out and replaced with that tool Brown, who was no big fan of the US, so the Yank love was not a high hurdle to clear. Remember John, The Iraq War was not popular with the Brit public at large.

          1. Blair lost for a lot of reasons beyond the Iraq war.

            1. I know this too John, the point is, even with Bush giving both Blair and Brown the tongue, there wasn’t a ton of US love in the air in the UK, Brit large.

              I agree His Pestilency made a poor diplomatic situation worse, especially with the bust transplant.

        2. Don’t forget, one of the very first thing Obama did when he moved into the White House was send the bust of Winston Churchill back to the Brits.

          Just a gratuitous insult, not even explicable as negligence or incompetence.

          1. That’s the problem with giving him the Nobel Peace Prize at the start – no incentive to keep the foreigners on side. Oh, and he did fuck all to deserve it, and even less since. That would be the other problem

          2. You know when you get bored with a video game and start doing everything wrong and stupid just to see how it reacts? Like after you placed first in every race in Burnout and had nothing left to do but initiate crashes that caused $2 million damage.

            I think that’s where the BO administration is right now. Unfortunately we’re the NPCs.

    2. “The Mexican ambassador to the United States on Thursday said a botched gun-tracking operation by America “poisoned” public opinion of the United States for the citizens of the United States.”

      I dont get to fix things often, but there. Fixed it.

    1. Good for him. Teacher looks cute. The 18 year old looks like a thug though.

      1. The 18 year old looks like a thug though.

        Which is why she went for him.

        1. Heh, I thought about posting that and decided not to.

    2. He seemed surprisingly collected during the “interview.”

      Where were these slutty teachers when I was in high school?

  36. A gang of Lithuanian diaper smugglers is using Sweden as a transit country to ferry cheap nappies bought in Norway for resale at a stiff markup in eastern Europe.

    http://www.thelocal.se/41008/20120524/

    1. Cheap nappies? Didn’t that funnyman radio cowboy Imus get in some hot water for making similar comments about a women’s basketball team?

      And they misspelled “furry” as “ferry”. Bad editing.

    2. Wow. I wonder why Lithuania has such high diaper prices. It seems like an odd thing to tax differentially, so that doesn’t seem like a good reason.

      1. The short answer BP: Locals want ’em to use cloth nappies. It’s an Eco-theological thing.

        1. Jesus. The Gaia cult has already made it into Eastern Europe?

        2. Stuff the landfills full or use gallons and gallons of fresh water.

          Is one of them really worse than the other?

      2. More than likely sweden subsidizes them so they are artificially cheap there….you know…for the children.

    3. There’s something cheap in Norway?

    1. That is the price we pay for not having an effective death penalty. Without the threat of the death penalty, how do you control inmates who have no hope of release? The only way is to take away more and more of their living standards. Since you are dealing with people who are violent, often mentally ill, and generally have huge issues with authority, that is unlikely to work. So you end up taking away more and more stuff until you end up with this. I think it would be better to avoid this by telling every prisoner that if they kill someone in prison, it is death.

      1. how do you control inmates who have no hope of release?

        Release them in Arizona and let concealed carry take care of them.

        1. That would one version of the death penalty.

          1. Well, kinda. I mean, they *could* live full, “rehabilitated” lives. As long as they didn’t do something stupid worthy of getting shot.

      2. Yes, but this isn’t about preventing murders.

        These guys are being held in solitary until they tell the guards about “Gang activity” within the prison.

        They’re trying to torment the prisoners until they give information that satisfies their tormentors.

        It’s stupid, inhumane, counterproductive.

        1. I agree. You can’t treat people like this. This is much worse than the death penalty. We have created a system where we systematically torture people and drive them insane.

      3. FTA: Most inmates have never been charged with gang-related conduct behind bars, their lawyers said, and are kept in the Security Housing Unit on flimsy evidence – a tattoo, some artwork in their possession, shaking hands with the wrong person, or inclusion in an undisclosed list by an unidentified informant.

        What was that again, John?

        1. They abused the system? What a surprise. That doesn’t change the reason why the system was created in the first place. And is all the more reason why the older system was better.

  37. Have we discussed this yet?

    Green Lantern is gay.

    And he acted like he had no idea what I was talking about.

    1. I don’t get why GL. If they are gonna have a superhero be gay, why not someone that at least someone who has had that sort of vibe, like Wonder Woman. Jeez.

      I still think Batman would have been awesomely funny, too.

      1. They’d get yelled at if the made WW gay. It’d just be seen as an excuse for her and Black Canary to finger-blast each other in the Watchtower.

        1. I’ll be in my bunk

        2. Like there aren’t nerds who haven’t made their own comics depicting this.

      2. I don’t get why GL.

        Duh, so he can now be formally called “The Gay Lantern.”

      3. My $ was on Robin.

          1. Aquaman has always been gay, but in the ‘lame’ kind of meaning, not the ‘sailors spend a lot of time at sea, so these things kind of happen’ meaning.

      4. Geez, what superhero isnt gay? Just look at them….the tights, the self absorption, constant conflict…..

        Still , I would pay to watch Wonder Woman munch carpet.

    2. That explains the affinity for jewelry and a cape

  38. Angry lefties already hanging Tom Barrett out to dry days before the recall election.

    Man, it is going to be so awesome next week when Walker kicks Barrett’s teeth in again. The Tonys, Mary Stacks, and Shrieking Idiots won’t even know what the hell hit them.

    1. Bill Clinton was recently dispatched to stump for Barrett and the Democratic Governor’s Association has been involved in the recall all along.

      Are they kidding? Who the fuck would this win over?

      1. Ole Bubba has sworn off the Super Duper Big Gulps. How could he not be persuasive?

      2. This is how far WJ Clinton has fallen–Team Blue now props him up like some faded reminder of past glories. The man’s become like an 80s hair metal band.

        1. Speaking of….don’t you just wish some of those guys would just give it up? It makes me sad to see Def Leppard in their late 50s’ still touring. At least rappers generally fade away after a while.

          1. I was an HS senior when we went to Detroit during the Rolling Stones “last tour”.

            It was 1982…

    2. They will just pretend it didn’t happen. Ignoring reality is pretty easy to do when you are living in a delusional fantasy world to begin with.

      1. Or just start circulating the petition for the next recall election. It’s not as if Walker did anything illegal to warrant this one.

        1. Listen to Climate of Hunter, Tilt and Drift* back to back and then tell me that he’s innocent

          * just kidding – they’re all great!

      2. “Once again those evil, lying Republicans have used their immoral, dirty tricks and vicious lies to subvert the proletariat and separate them from the vanguard that would lead them into a new utopia.”

        1. Secret out of state billionaires stole their democracy.

    1. I’ll pay HER the $10 if she lets me watch…

  39. http://patdollard.com/2012/06/…..as-hooker/

    If I won the lottery, I’d hit it.

    1. Ah shit, I forgot to doctor the link. Fuck it, I’m lazy.

  40. http://patdollard.com/2012/06/…..en-voters/

    Could they be any more transparent?

    1. Most Transparent Administration in History.

      Fucking Voting Rights Act strikes again. The Dems have to thank their lucky stars that they can keep red states from combatting voter fraud eternally, it seems.

  41. This one time, at band camp… Teacher-student edition.

    1. What the fuck happened to his hair? It looks like someone spread their butt-cheeks, sat on his head, then stood up.

  42. After thirty-one years Egypt’s State of Emergency law expires.

    That’s a relief. I wonder when will the State of Perpetual Emergency Law [*] will expire here in the U.S.

    [*] Commonly known as The New Deal.

  43. A new law in Venezuela bans the commercial sale of firearms and ammunition.

    This will give a well received boost to the local firearm and ammunition market… black market, that is.

  44. The FDA is seeking to secure supplies of sodium thiopental, a drug many states use in executions, after a judge ruled against its importation in March.

    What happened to shooting squads? Let prisoners die with their chins up and a look of defiance – you know, to let them die like men.

    1. It’s apparently inhumane because guns are icky or something. If you ask me being cleanly shot sounds like one hell of a better way to go than being strapped to a table and slowly poisoned.

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