Is It Possible to Outsmart TSA's Body Scanners?


One man says he's found a way to get unapproved objects through TSA's backscatter x-ray machines: 

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  1. Guess who just got placed on the no-fly list...

    1. we skipped the no-fly list and put him straight onto the full-body-cavity-no-lube search list

      1. I figured you'd just take him out with a drone.

        1. Union rules - no drones may substitute a human being for the performance of any task

        2. Don't be ridiculous. All hits on US Citizens must be approved by the President. If the TSA does it, it could get whacked. Not that it would know. If you're part of a crew, nobody ever tells you that they're going to kill you, doesn't happen that way. There weren't any arguments or curses like in the movies. See, your murderers come with smiles, they come as your friends, the people who've cared for you all of your life. And they always seem to come at a time that you're at your weakest and most in need of their help.

          1. They'll come at you sideways. It's how they think. It's how they move.Sidle up and smile. Hit you where you're weak. Sort of man they're like to send believes hard. Kills and never asks why.

            1. "It will happen this way. You may be walking. Maybe the first sunny day of the spring. And a car will slow beside you, and a door will open, and someone you know, maybe even trust, will get out of the car. And he will smile, a becoming smile. But he will leave open the door of the car and offer to give you a lift."

              1. When they send for you, you go in alive, you come out dead, and it's your best friend that does it.

                I think it fits better with invisible furry hand's quote.

              2. had to be said.

    2. My neighbor just met a bisexual man on ---datebi*cOMit's where for men and women looking
      for bisexual and bi-curious individuals to meet in a friendly and comfortable environment.
      It's a nice place for the people who have the same sexual orientation.

  2. I'm not so crazy of his constant point of saying, "teh terrorists can get through this! We in danger!"

    I'm with him 99% of the way, but just reiterating that we are all in perpetual danger seems to provide just enough rope for any "critic" to go = "Yeah! Scanners don't work! We need MORE BETTER security!"... allowing the TSA to persist in the false notion that they provide any value *at all*.

    I know its necessary to bring in the pants-wetting crowd as well, but overselling it is a little annoying.

    1. I think his claims that he is doing this as a public service is just a form of "legal disclaimer" to cover his ass. He knows full well that Obama can assassinate him for demonstrating just how useless the TSA is.

    2. Maybe you should watch it again. What he's saying is that we need the old metal detectors because they're better - something a lot of us have been saying for a while.

      The underwear and shoe bombs failed because they lacked detonators. They lacked them because the perps doubted the metal-cased detonators would make it through security. It would be trivial to get a detonator through the rape-scanners('prison-purse' it).

  3. too ugly to pat down?

  4. So this is what the guy from Flock of Seagulls is doing now.

  5. Dammit. I was going to put that in the links.

  6. Yeah, I don't think his capture is feasible.

  7. Damn! Is that Christina Ricci's twin brother?

    That's some serious forehead.

  8. Is that Christina Ricci's twin brother? He's got more forehead than Vince Vaughn.

  9. I agree with the guy, but why aren't his lips synced with his words?

    1. Side effect of going through so many backscatter x-ray devices. Another unreported hazard of those machines.

    2. Because he's talking out of his butt?

      1. What falsehood did he aver?

        1. Oh nothing he said, but whenever someone's voice is out of sync with their lips, it might be because they're talking out of their ass:

  10. I watched Old School last night and was amazed that the airport security scene at the beginning seemed so far fetched that it was comical in 2003... Owen Wilson didn't even get strip searched!

    1. Imagine trying the Spinal Tap airport security scene with the TSA.

  11. Now we'll just get scanned twice (front and side), taking that much longer to get through security. Of course, implementing it will be an admission that TSA is incompetent.

  12. This Wired article talks about a study in the "Journal of Transportation Security" that points out the same "side of the body" flaw:

    The report said an explosive, such as pentaerythritol tetranitrate, "would be invisible to this technology, ironically, because of its large volume, since it is easily confused with normal anatomy." The report found that "a wire or a box-cutter blade taped to the side of the body, or even a small gun in the same location, will be invisible."

    1. Small gun would set off the metal detector.

      1. I have gone through airport security several times where they send me through the body scanner, but not the metal detector, just like the guy in the video did.

  13. I was traveling with co-workers last week from Columbus to Chicago and back. One of my co-workers thought he could take as much Scotch as he wanted as long as it was in 3oz bottles. Evidently he was correct. He had at least 8 bottles distributed in 3 ziplock bags (you're only supposed to have one baggie). So basically he takes 24oz of a flammable liquid in his carry on. Still had more than one baggie with Scotch on the return flight from O'Hare. Didn't get looked at either time. Good thing they make me us all go through all this stupid BS.

    1. It always works. I've done that 8 or 9 times in the last 3 years. I've developed a ritual where I toast my seat mate when the wheels leave the ground. Not all are appreciative of my ingenuity.

      1. It's always "mouthwash", the very few times that I've had to fly since 9/11. 3 oz = two shots. If I need more than that, there's always airport bars. The one in Philly had a great selection of PA microbrews, and you can taste a large selection of NC wines in Charlotte's.

  14. Sshssh! Don' tell the ossifers tha' I have a wee drinky in my bag, else the Theft from Suitcases Administration will take 'em... Yah, thass right...

  15. I fly only when absolutely necessary. Last time while waiting in line, I amused myself by coming up with half a dozen ways to get a weapon past the clowns. Since the bad guys undoubtedly have the same (or more recent) manuals I used at [I'd have to kill you] forty years ago, the TSA is about as much protection as a flak jacket made of toilet paper. Zero out their budget NOW!

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