Reason Morning Links: Bounties, Borders, Birthers

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  1. Great. Wonder if my Apple shares are going to tank today

    1. In a just world…

    2. Still up 10,000% since 1980.

      1. well, I wasn’t alive in 1980. 😛 But it is still up a lot higher than what I bought it at.

        1. kill me

  2. [Insert random gross out link here]

    1. Ewww … are those pictures even legal? She hasn’t even hit puberty yet!

  3. USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!

    Just getting my jingoism on. The US RULES at kicking tinpot dictators’ asses!

    USA! USA! USA! USA! USA!

    1. And, yes, we know that’s all due to the [Agri]Social[NotHunterGatherer] lifestyle choice we make, Nativo Blanco. Hopefully with some more bombing and killing and destroying stuff, EVERYONE can get back to living “closer to the land”.

      1. Yawn.

        1. Arn’t you starting back to school this week? You should study for Biology Class.

          1. Please don’t, PIRS. Ignoring her–not feeding the howling core of raw need for attention–is the only thing that hurts her.

            1. Is that Rather returning?

              1. They haven’t got around to banning her smartphone IP. She has to tap out her impotent rage on a tiny keyboard.

                1. impotent rage on a tiny keyboard

                  HEY!!

                2. Did they finally ban White Indian and Herc? White Indian was really the worst troll ever on here. It is one thing to troll. But the troll should at least try to troll on the topic. Nothing worse than a single issue troll who takes over even the most mundane thread and makes it about their troll topic.

                  1. Herc was an awesome troll, and I hope he hasn’t been banned.

            2. I don’t think this is Rather if that is your thought. The name does not link to her blog and the email address it links to is da-gand@da-reeson.com

              It also does not sound like her IMHO.

              1. That’s rectal, no doubt about it.

              2. PIRS, she stopped linking to both because some of the filters can block her at that level. Her handle-hopping sniping is always done with no link or a fake link.

                Rather has always operated on two levels: “rather” who is promoting her shitty blog and attempting to actually establish a stable identity on the blog and what Episiarch always called “Anonopussy” the short burst insult-greifer with a thousand handles.

                If you noticed, when rather went, the vast majority of that stopped as well. That means you can really understand that she was sometimes posting insults under a dozen different handles on a single thread. She’s crazy and should have been banned a long time ago.

                I know some other stuff. Email me off list (anyone of you may) and I’ll tell you the real crazy behind it all.

                1. Rather is ananopussy? Really? She really is crazy. Why would she be all nice posting as Rather, and then stalk everyone of my threads with the most annoying Tonyesque liberal drivel imaginable.

                  1. It was actually a connection I made a long time ago, but I never had any proof. Until now.

                    White Indian is not rather. It is another manifestation of the David Matthews/Ben Wolf/Patriot Henry eco-troll. (It has had a lot of other handles.) Whether it is a real troll or just a spoofer is another matter.

                    1. White Indian is the same troll who posted here last year under a different handle and was in love with the Chinese fascist planned economy.

                    2. White Indian is “The Truth”? Maybe there is just one troll unity posting all of this crap.

                    3. It occurred to me that White Indian et al. could be another afforestation of the Dan T. megatroll. I don’t think he’s clever enough for it, but you never know.

                    4. I never had any proof. Until now.

                      HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

                2. I know some other stuff.

                  What, is she some fat chick that you ass-banged in 1988 and never called again? That’s why she’d rather be crazy than libertarian, isn’t it. You fucking prick.

                3. Did she really get banned? I thought that took some kind of nuclear screwup. I musta missed something.

                  1. Banning is currently the leading hypothesis. It makes sense, with the fact that she doesn’t post under her name and her activity has dropped off so sharply.

                    1. Well I hope Sock Puppets are still kosher.

                    2. Where does “Organic Girl” tie into the continuum?

                    3. On the adorable end of the continuum.

                    4. So…oddly enough, this griefer manages to be more annoying than The LoneWacko. Yikes.

                    5. Art, I have to say, I miss LW. He was a satire waiting to happen. Grego comes close sometimes, but it’s just not the same.

                    6. Banning is currently the leading hypothesis. It makes sense, with the fact that she doesn’t post under her name and her activity has dropped off so sharply.

                      Maybe she’s been institutionalized.

                    7. Perhaps we have reached Peak Troll…ohhh teh horror!

                    8. So were you guys talking about something while I was away?

                    9. All she wanted was a Pepsi, and H&R wouldn’t give it to her.

                    10. Banning is currently the leading hypothesis. It makes sense, with the fact that she doesn’t post under her name and her activity has dropped off so sharply.

                      Not every mouth-breathing idiot with a keyboard stops posting because they are banned. Some just pick up their ball and go home, too ashamed to face the fucking music. Like joe.

  4. Jobless claims rise by 5000. Expectations: decline by 3000. What kind of government shills do they have making these predictions? Does anyone listen to them anymore?

    1. NPR did a very nice piece a few months back on the business of public prognostication, and how there is infinite incentive to be right, but zero consequence to being wrong, so the prediction market is flooded by opportunistic hacks.

      Tried to find a link, but failed.

  5. I’m not gonna say I told you so, but… White House to scale back regulations on businesses. It doesn’t go nearly as far as my proposal to end executive rulemaking. Hell, it doesn’t go far at all, but its a crack in the dam.

    1. The White House issuing a press release on scaling back regulations, and the White House actually scaling back regulations, are two completely different things.

      Seeing as they are vomiting forth regulations at an unprecedented pace, and have even more in the pipeline, color my intelligence insulted.

      1. Yeah. I should clarify. In the Obama will make a jobs speech thread, I said that the only things he could do that would work (not that he will) is to stop executive rulemaking (regulating) and propose the removal of a number of onerous statutes.

  6. Kate Moss poses topless for calendar.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvs…..-down.html

    1. I assumed the link would be more like this. (SFW, BTW)

    2. She has a lot better rack than I expected.

      1. [rummages through drawer in search of magnifying glass]
        Aha! Now let’s have a look at those things.

        1. Look for something resembling a couple fried eggs – you’ll spot ’em right away.

    3. I have always liked her perfect nipples. They’re so tight!

  7. “Here comes Rubio birtherism.”

    Since we are not following the Constitution anyway why does it matter where a potential Vice President (or actual President) was born?

    1. No, its worse than that. He was born in ‘Murca, but the claim is that you have to be born to two (or at least one) US Citizens. Although, all of the cites issued were before birthright citizenship rulings for public services and support.

      1. I don’t understand why they didn’t Americanize these people’s names at Ellis Island.

      2. Following that same line of “thinking” it would be acceptable to deport the so called “Anchor Babies”. Just for clarification, I do not support this, but it follows the same line of “thought”.

        1. I hope the Republicans do run Rubio as a VP if for no other reason than for the entertainment value of listening to open borders liberals explain how an anchor baby really isn’t a citizen.

          1. That would indeed be fun to watch.

          2. John, both of Rubio’s parents were legal residents. He doesn’t fit anyone’s definition of ANCHORBABIEZZZ!!OMG!!.

            And this citizenship ruckus is not being raised by OMG!!!!LIBERRRULLLLZZZZ!!!!

            It’s being raised by the same “constitutional purists” that contested BHO’s NBC status on the grounds of their contention that a natural born citizen has to have American citizens for both parents (not just one as in the case of BHO).

            As the linked writer noted, the one thing in their favor is that they are not “partisan hacks”.

            Although, it is worth remembering that the first questioning of the chosen one’s citizenship came from th Hillary Clinton campaign.

            1. I didn’t RTA Kreel. I frankly didn’t realize that anyone out there was so nuts that they think the son of two legal residents born in the USA is not a “natural born citizen”. Wow.

              1. John, on the Obama birther front there were two camps.

                One was the “certificators” because of their belief that Obama was actually foreign born and that his Hawaiian BC was either forged or inadequate evidence for other reasons.

                The other group was the “NBCers”. This is a bunch of nativists who insist that the definition of “natural born citizen” is a person who is both born in the United States and has parents who are both US citizens at the time of his or her birth. It’s apparently OK if either or both parents are naturalized citizens, apparently. But legal residents definitely do not make the cut.

                Their contention that the Founders might have felt this way is pretty well grounded, apparently. Unfortunately for them the founders never bother to spell it out in eith the COTUS or other legislation.

                1. The general secrecy about Obama’s past and the wierdness of that past is what fueled the birther movement.

                2. For being so strongly for a both parents need to be citizens for the child to be a natural-born citizen the founders never passed such a requirement.

                  What actually was ratified was a requirement that the person be subject to the jurisdiction of the US. The Supreme Court has extended that to mean absolutely everyone with a presence on US soil.

            2. Remember, the “anchor” part of “anchor baby” comes from the apparently magical power of the baby’s status to keep his illegal alien parents from being deported.

              Since parents with children who are citizens are deported with some regularity, that particular talisman does not seem to work very well.

              1. Not really. It generally means the kid goes back to Guatemala and comes back with his US passport when he is old enough to work.

                1. Actually, the child can stay in the US provided the parents can arrange for care.

                  And, yes, when the child turns 21 he can petition to have his parents admitted as legal residents.

                  I’m not sure that many people start out with that as the plan though.

                  My point is that it’s not much of an anchor if you get deported anyway.

                  1. The anchor part that illegal immigrants are fully aware of is that the child, as a citizen, is eligible for welfare benefits.

                    1. They don’t get any welfare benefits after they’ve been deported though.

                2. Not really. It generally means the kid goes back to Guatemala and comes back with his US passport when he is old enough to work.

                  This is what I thought should have been done with Elian Gonzalez. Make him a US Citizen the day before he was sent back to Cuba.

                  1. Then charge Elian with illegal travel by a U.S. citizen to a proscribed country and sentence him to live out his minor years in foster care? Genius!

            1. Are you awarding points for stupid comments now?

              1. Why? Feeling left out?

                1. Yes. 🙂

      3. RUN! ANCHOR BABY!

    2. *Obviously* “natural born citizen” merely precludes Presidents delivered by Caesarean section.

      1. SO I am not eligible to be president. What a relief. I was afraid someone would ask me to run.

        1. So you were “timely ripped”. 😉

          1. Indeed. The larger an unborn baby is in physical size the more likely this is to be the case.

            1. unborn “baby”

              Don’t you mean unborn “part of the woman’s body she is free to do whatever she wants with?”

              Or are you one of the people smart enough to recognize a person when you see one, whether or not it has exited the womb?

              1. I prefer “abortion-eligible fetus”, or, if you are feeling contentious, “abortion-ready parasite”.

      2. This makes sense to me.

  8. Easy there, Rand:

    Yet, the out-of-control EPA has waged a war on coal and the families whose livelihoods depend upon it.

    Cry havoc!

    1. Of course he is right. Under the Anointed One, hallowed be his name, the EPA has done nothing but try to destroy coal fired energy production.

      1. War terminology is a big problem. I’m disappointed to see him using it. Higher standards and all that.

        1. War destroys and causes suffering. The EPA destroys and causes suffering. Sounds close enough for me.

          1. Fine. You’ve got a lot of amicable counterparts in the DEA and Lyndon Johnson’s administration.

    2. That’s how our government creates jobs.
      By banning things.

      1. A government ban on government bans might solve unemployment.

      2. It’s a great way to create new markets.

  9. Steve Jobs resigns.

    Jobs created and saved, so he can afford to retire.

      1. Now if we would merely destroy all existing Apple products and burn the designs, lots of economic growth would result because we’d need to pay engineers to design new devices and workers to build new ones!

        1. Still admiring FoE’s handiwork.

          1. Whoever spoofed me did a good job on that one.

  10. Principles? I don’t care about those if it’s something I really, really, really want.

    You Can’t Shop Anywhere

    The founder of IKEA ? which once seemed like the most wholesome of all multinational companies ? was apparently a Nazi. At this point, basically every retail chain is tainted with some sort of scandal. Here’s a helpful guide.
    IKEA

    According to the Telegraph, a new book reveals that founder Ingvar Kamprad was a member of the Swedish Nazi party, and that he once wrote that he “misses no opportunity to work for the movement.” But it’s okay ? he totally had a Jewish friend!

    Crackers in Bed Thu 25 Aug 2011 1:51 AM
    The Ikea story is not new at all; the founder admitted his past Nazi party ties in his own autobiography 15 years ago. In 1995 he sent a letter to all the employees and stockholders of Ikea apologizing for his past, and referred to his involvement with the party as “greatest mistake of his life.” A simple google search would have revealed this info.

    cait98 @Crackers in Bed
    Thank god. I’m moving this week and have spent the last month picking out the most-bang-for-my-buck IKEA items. I hadn’t *bought* them just yet, now I feel like I still can.

    1. LOL! My wife just discovered Ikea in the last year, so now we own, like, approximately $7B worth of their shit. (doing our part to help the economy)

      Now I have reason to double our purchases there…

    2. In all seriousness, who cares? Krupp was a huge weapons manufacturer. But everyone who was hard at work making German 88s to terrorize Europe are long dead. I don’t see how buying a coffee maker seventy years later is any kind of an endorsement of Nazism. Maybe in 1946 it would have been. But not now.

      1. SugarFree works at a state-supported library. Just sayin’.

      2. That’s like boycotting Mitsubishi for making the Zero.

        1. Or BWM and MB….

          1. Or BMW, even.

        2. Boycott Mitsubishi for making crappy cars.

          1. Sure, but if you can offered a Eclipse Convertible on a rental jump on it.

            They may be a nightmare to pay the upkeep on, but they’re all kinds of fun to drive for a weekend.

      3. And the fact that 40 million rifles in the world use the Mauser bolt action – and Mauser built rifles for – gasp! – the Nazis!

        Give me a break.

        Besides, pretty much everybody in Sweden was either a Nazi or a fascist. Their government was (and is) pretty fascitic considering their many public-private partnerships and cushy relations between their industry and government. It is no wonder to me that IKEA got founded precisely because of the owner’s many connections with the old political party. How many new Swedish enterprises have been founded since the 50’s? Anyone? Anyone?

      4. Do we even need to bring up Volkswagen?

        1. Didn’t he supposedly have some small input on the design? So driving a VW Beetle is like driving with Hitler.

          1. He told Ferdinand Porsche to design a small, efficient, cheap car everyone could own. And thus was born the Beetle. They really are little Hitlermobiles.

            1. Porsche designed the Tiger Tank also.

              1. What amazes me about the Beetle is that it is the one piece of equipment ever designed by Germans that wasn’t completely over engineered. Simple, reliable and cheap and just not something Germans do well.

                1. You are so obviously not an engineer.

                  1. First, you defend Scandinavian Nazis. Now you defend Hitler’s car. What can this mean?

                    1. Have you ever seen a movie called The boys from Brazil?

                    2. This explains much.

                    3. My work here is done!

              2. This I did NOT know. That Tiger was a fucking masterpiece of mobile artillery. Awesome, awesome, awesome…

                1. Except that it was too darn complicated to mass produce.
                  Mass production won that war, not engineering.

                  1. The Tiger could beat Five Shermans.

                    We kept on running into SIX!

          2. Didn’t he supposedly have some small input on the design?

            Why yes, yes he did.

          3. Porsche also built a tank for the Nazis, but it never really worked.

            1. The Tiger (P) or Elefant. Forgot to add the machine gun, and it’s 8 MPH top speed and lack of traversible turret meant that Soviet infantrymen could run up behind and dump gasoline in the motor.

              1. Why the Germans didn’t just tow a captured T-34 back to Berlin and say, “Build a hundred thousand exact copies of THIS as cheaply and quickly as you can” I don’t know.

                1. Once Hermann Goering sarcastically asked fighter ace Adolf Galland what he needed to win the Battle of Britain. “Herr Reichsmarschall, a squadron of Spitfires!” But he was only kidding.

                  I’ve often thought it would have been nice if the US had gotten the T-34 design from the Soviets and used it to replace the Sherman. Of course, the Ordinance Department was sure the Sherman was good enough, and no one would seriously want a tank Not Invented Here.

                  1. We have much more excuse to not know that the Soviet tanks were better than ours.

                    The Germans obviously were well aware. Painfully aware.

                    1. Tank for tank, I think the Panther was better.

                      The problem the Nazis had with Russian and American tanks was that there were so damn many of them.

                  2. Actually NEOCOn, the T34 is an American design. It was rejected by the war department because it was considered too big to be able to transport them to the then anticipated European War.

                    The Sherman was a lousy tank in many ways. But, you have to remember it didn’t do any good to build tanks in Detroit if you couldn’t get them to Europe. The US settled on the Sherman because you could fit more of them into ships. It was a conscious decision to go with the smaller tank.

                2. Because that is not how Germans roll Fluffy. At the Air and Space Museum they have a fully operational ME 262 Jet fighter. Look inside the cockpit and you will see an exquisitely made leather seat. Think about that for a moment. The Germans were in 1944 running out of time and materials and were building a plane that stood a good chance to be destroyed in combat. Yet, they still took the time and effort to make this great seat rather than a cheap canvass one. That tells you everything you need about the German mentality.

                  Also, while the Tiger was huge and hard to maintain, the Panther was a great tank and stood up quite well to the T34. The Germans blew the shit out of T34 many times. The Russians just produced so many of them.

                  1. And yet in 1944 the British were still putting 50% more man hours into building each Spitfire than the Germans put into there equivalent fighter plane.

                    I once heard someone say that the Germans overengineer everything, but the British overmanufacture everything.

          4. “Driving with Hitler”

            That would make a great movie title.

    3. Swedish Nazis opened Swedish Walmart? Awesome.

    4. Fuck you, squirrels. Post my comment. I love that a Swedish Nazi opened Swedish Walmart.

    5. This is common knowledge in Scandinavia. Big fucking deal.

  11. Rebels fight for full control of Tripoli

    Rebel reinforcements stream into Libyan capital to aid fight against forces loyal to Muammar Gaddafi.
    Last Modified: 25 Aug 2011 11:40

    Rebel reinforcements have streamed into the Libyan capital, Tripoli, to join in the fight against Muammar Gaddafi loyalists, who are putting up strong resistance in some pockets of the city.

    Fighters from the port city of Misrata have joined fellow rebels who spearheaded the weekend assault that saw the Libyan capital swiftly overrun and Gaddafi’s Bab al-Aziziya compound falling to the rebels.

    Fighting on Thursday was concentrated along the perimeters of Bab al-Aziziya and the neighbouring Abu Salim district, where Gaddafi reportedly released, armed and paid former prisoners to fight for his regime.

    Elsewhere in the country, rebel commanders said they are readying fresh attempts to advance against Gaddafi’s forces in his hometown Sirte, 360km east of the capital and to break a siege of Zuwarah, a town to the west.

    http://english.aljazeera.net/n…..35612.html

    1. Qaddafi flees Tripoli with family. Guerrilla and/or tribal warfare feared next
      DEBKAfile Exclusive Report August 23, 2011, 10:04 PM (GMT+02:0

      Regional intelligence experts are baffled by the enigma of the mysterious sudden disappearance of Qaddafi’s divisions overnight. It’s as though the ground swallowed them up leaving no trace.

      No one knows Qaddafi’s destination but informed observers expect him to make for Sebha in southern Libya where the local tribes are loyal to whom and where he established a whole range of subterranean military facilities.

      Prominent among them were members of his own Gaddadfa tribe which numbers some 100,000 members and is based in Sirte, a town lying on the Mediterranean coast in the north between Tripoli and the rebel base of Benghazi. Qaddafi will need the help of tribes other than his own in a region 800 kilometers south of his home town on the fringes of the Sahara, for waging a guerrilla war against the new rulers in Tripoli.

      http://www.debka.com/article/21234/

    2. NATO, sleeper cells drove rebels’ Tripoli push

      By Hadeel Al-Shalchi and Rami Al-Shaheibi – The Associated Press
      Posted : Wednesday Aug 24, 2011 9:20:53 EDT

      But why did the armed Gadhafi troops melt away when the rebels drove through?

      Fathi Baja, head of the rebel leadership’s political committee, said it was all thanks to a deal cut with the head of the batallion in charge of protecting Tripoli’s gates, the Mohammed Megrayef Brigade.

      His name was Mohammed Eshkal and he was very close to Gadhafi and his family. Baja said Gadhafi had ordered the death of his cousin twenty years ago.

      “Eshkal carried a grudge in his heart against Gadhafi for 20 years, and he made a deal with the NTC ? when the zero hour approached he would hand the city over to the rebels,” said Haroun.

      “Eshkal didn’t care much about the revolution,” said Haroun. “He wanted to take a personal revenge from Gadhafi and when he saw a chance that he will fall, he just let it happen.”

      http://www.armytimes.com/news/…..li-082411/

  12. Face ‘bitten off’ in nightclub attack

    The 31-year old victim lost part of both ears, his upper lip and part of his nose in the assault by a man outside Funky Box in Liverpool city centre. A second man held bystanders and a bouncer back as his accomplice attacked the man on ground.

    1. In the Want Ads, the Funky Box has an opening for a bouncer. “Experience required, and this time we really mean it.”

      1. How is the Funky Box not a discount brothel?

        1. … or a ’70s all-girl disco revue?

    2. He was attacked by a chimpanzee?

      1. A very close relative.

  13. http://www.humanevents.com/article.php?id=45722

    Dealing with the really important issues, making sure goat shepherds have employer provided cell phones.

    1. “and comfy beds.”

  14. “if they have something of a personal nature they want to discuss with the congressman, they come up afterwards and the congresssman will stay around as long as it takes to talk to them.”

    I think I see a solution to (some of) our legislative woes ….

  15. http://sandefur.typepad.com/fr……html#more

    Very good post absolutely savaging the Left’s faith based economic ideas.

  16. State insurers steel themselves for Hurricane Irene.

    Up and down the east coast, they laughed at me for getting hurriquake insurance, but who’s laughing now?

    1. Bwahahahaa!!

    2. Bwahahahaa!!

    1. Eight hundred dollars? It must make one hell of a tasty sandwich.

      1. Does it a least wash the dishes and make coffee?

        1. “$800 vagina”…? Code name for the First Lady.

          1. Shyeah. Right. Divided by 1600, maybe.

            1. I’d call her the $10 Million Vagina, given that she has spent tat much on vacations during the last 41 months. She’s writing a book about it:

              Traveling the world on only $243,902 / month!

    2. Oh, for those that can’t go to the product page, it’s called “Fuck Me Silly.”

    3. That doesn’t seem worth $800, even for the smelliest of truckers. That’s what, 40 truck stop blowjobs? 60?

      1. The thing I wonder about those and products like a fleshlight… how do you clean the damn things? Some of them are just reversible sleeves, but most aren’t. What a sad Saturday night it must be to have to give your rubber “girlfriend” a douche to keep down the smell.

        1. Maybe these guys aspire to bang paraplegic babes.

          1. There is those people who use insulin shock or succinylcholine on their partners to simulate necrophilia.

            1. Is that why you pretend to be diabetic? It’s pretty smart, I’ll grant you that.

            2. How the hell do you *know* this?

              What disgusting places are you exploring that you become aware of these things?

              I hope you are just combining your twisted imagination with Rule 34 to infer that such people must exist.

              The alternative is about as disgusting as waking up next to rather in a honeymoon suite in Vegas.

              1. It was a Law and Order episode years ago.

              2. tarran,

                It was suggested that “the game” was how Claus Von Bulow knew how to overdose Sunny Von Bulow with insulin.

                How obscure can the practice be? It was the subject of an episode of Law and Order 11 years ago.

        2. Of all of your posts SF, that is the first one that actually made me vomit a little. And I am not easily shocked.

        3. Some of them are just reversible sleeves

          “PRESENT!”

          1. Let me be clear.

            HEY!!

    4. Extra video footage of the perpetrator who only needs the lower half of a woman.

  17. Jewelry heist is a bust for “clown” robbers [VIDEO]

    Gun-wielding imbeciles in bad clown get-ups, robbing people of fake paste “jewelry.”

    Seriously.

    1. Maybe these were hipsters who only wanted to rob ironically.

      1. Hmmmm…sounds like a good MO for a lesser Batman villain.

        1. “PRESENT!”

  18. http://moelane.com/2011/08/24/…..-election/

    Youtube and its impact on politics. Nothing you ever say goes away now.

    1. “It was not a good idea to yell about the debt incurred by your predecessor when you’re going to end up beating his record in half the time; but Barack Obama is very much an old-style politician ? and, at that, one not used to being called on his record (this is where a lack of re-election campaign experience hurts). He’s thus got four to six years of potential gaffes to explain away? and the worst bit (for him)? Everybody has access to those gaffes.”

      I love it! Well written article.

    1. “Are you being sarcastic?”

      “I don’t even know anymore…”

      JennaOwly Thu 25 Aug 2011 6:34 AM
      Mostly I’m upset because he didn’t have more books by authors who are transgendered, gay, lesbian, bisexual, African, East/South/West/North Asian, middle eastern, multi/biracial and Stephanie Meyer. Also I’m upset his reading list didn’t include more cookbooks, and there was basically no French literature.

      1. Is there any French literature written by transgendered bisexual East Africans?

        1. “Il faut un un arc-en-ciel-villiage”

      2. I love how Stephanie Meyer is just thrown in after listing all the assorted groups she would prefer the president read.

        1. It’s almost like she was being sarcastic or something.

          1. sarcasm, as generally recognized by the rest of the internets is not practiced on Jezebel. They are serious. 100% of the freaking time. Feminism is some serious business, don’t you know this?

            1. I think the cookbooks is a giveaway. What’s sad is that they had to throw that in to dog-whistle their sarcasm; otherwise, it would be a totally typically lefty/prog/concerned post.

          2. That’s what I gathered. No way in the world that wasn’t a troll.

            Hey, Goldwater. What name are you posting under there, you crafty bastard?

      3. Who reads a cookbook!?!

        Sure, I consult them, but if you have a staff of cooks, why would you even bother curling up with one? It’s not like it’s a manual documenting OpenVMS system calls.

        1. The Wife reads cookbooks.

      4. Wasn’t there an Air America radio host who said (once off the air) that he hated talking about a subject, only to be deluged with calls / emails about how he’d neglected to talk about the “impact [subject discussed] would have on the GLBT community

    2. It’s also possible that he’s been reading Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World

      Somebody’s been into the soma.

  19. Someone just forwarded me a fake beer ad with a picture of Obama and the caption

    Obama, Not Too Dark, Bitter, And Not Much of a Head

    I think the idea that Obama is kind of angry and nasty is catching on.

    1. Wake me when people start realizing this *before* electing the bastards.
      Seriously, has there been a single president who wasn’t angry and nasty?

      no hugs for thugs,
      Shirley Knott

      1. Reagan wasn’t. Neither was Bush I. Clinton could be. But that was only when people challenged him and he let out his inner petulant child. But in most circumstances he was pleasant enough. So was Bush II. The only really angry nasty ones we have had in my lifetime were Nixon, Carter and Obama.

        1. Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!
          Reagan was an Alzheimer’s imbecile whose thin facade of civility did little to mask either his anger or his nastiness.
          Bush 1? right…
          Read my lips, no new Texans!
          The man got elected by use of anger and nastiness, and indulged the pettiness of the spineless throughout his “illustrious” career.

          no hugs for thugs,
          Shirley Knott

          1. Shirley,

            You are an idiot. Reagan was whip smart and wildly charming in person and in public. Even his political enemies had to admit he was a great guy to be around. And Bush I going back on his taxes pledge may have been bad politics or even bad economics, but that is hardly evidence of nastiness.

            Even liberals stopped using the “Reagan was dumb” line years ago.

            1. Yeah, Reagan had three pretty tough years right at the start, but you never once got the idea that he was sinking into an abyss of bitterness, frustration, and despair, the way Obama palpably appears to be every time he’s on the news.

              The guy folded like a house of cards.

              1. Reagan was always optimistic. I got the sense towards the middle of 1992 that Bush I just didn’t want the job anymore. He had been VP and President, has overseen the end of the Cold War, gotten the country through the S&L crisis and was just tired of being President. I always felt like he was not really trying during that election. But even though he seemed tired and bored with being President, he was never angry and bitter like Obama.

                1. Damn Troll names.

                  1. Clinton seemed to be a ball of rage at times, but you also got the sense that he was one of those guys who kind of got a kick out of being angry and being in a fight. So even when he was pissy (aka the whole Monica time) he never seemed like he was folding.

                    Obama is not like that. He seems angry, but helpless. I know the situation in Congress constrains him a lot, but he could at least pretend.

                    I see him holding a Cabinet meeting and opening discussion by saying, “Guys, what we have here is clearly a run out the clock kind of sit-u-ation.”

                    1. I think Clinton has a temper and lets it get the better of him sometimes. But he wasn’t always angry. Love him or hate him, you could probably drive across country with Clinton and have a good time. You could do with Reagan and have a great time. Bush I would at least be tolerable. But I can’t imagine doing it with Obama. I just see him whining and bitching the whole time. He just doesn’t seem like a very happy or pleasant guy.

                    2. “He just doesn’t seem like a very happy or pleasant guy.”

                      Would you be if you were married to Michelle?

                  2. Is John’s Law accidentally using a joke handle and then misspelling it as well?

                    1. Pretty much.

                2. Well he was definitely bored during that one debate when he looked at his watch.

                  1. All hail John’z Law!

          2. STEVE SMITH SAY HELLO SHIRLEY! STEVE SMITH LIKES WHAT YOU SAY AND WILL MEET YOU FOR COFFEE! STEVE SMITH NOT OFTEN FIND SOMEBODY SO STUPID TO RAPE! UH-OH, DID STEVE SMITH SAY THAT LAST PART OUT LOUD?

        2. I’d take zombie Nixon over Obama any day of the week.

          1. us too!

  20. http://newsok.com/article/3597…..=columnist

    Colleges just get creepier and more Owellian. This must be read to be believed.

    1. You know, I’m not going to go too hard on colleges about this stuff. Most of it is being required by the insurance companies to maintain liability.

      Get rid of in loco parentis for legal adults and most of this shit goes away. And it would save the universities millions–and, as a bonus, they can fire the alcohol compliance officers.

      1. True. A good friend of mine used to be a campus cop at a large state university. He is actually that rare bird, a reasonable good sense cop. When he first started they would send drunk college kids they found wondering the campus home. They were not driving and not hurting anyone. And provided they didn’t mouth off and agreed to go back home they let them go.

        Then the insurance companies got involved. And because of the potential liability of letting a drunk kid go and later having them choke on their own vomit or wander into traffic, they started having to arrest anyone they found on campus who was obviously drunk.

        1. Then the insurance companies lawyers got involved.

          ftfy

      2. It’s absurd that colleges are liable for stupid decisions adult students make. They should have no more responsibility for the students’ drinking habits than any land lord.

        When I was at college, you basically had to be openly dealing, or have a keg in a dorm room to get in trouble for alcohol or drugs (we were fortunate in having campus security that were not police). I wonder what it is like now?

        1. We are officially a dry and tobacco free campus. Liability law… bringing the BYU experience to everyone.

          1. BTW, SF, my husband would like to thank you (with heavy sarcasm) for introducing me to Crystal Castles concurrent with his attempt at tobacco cessation.

            1. Tell him it could have been worse… you could have started playing Warty’s black metal at full volume while he was trying to sleep.

              1. That Crystal Castles featuring Robert Smith is brilliant.

                1. Yes, yes it is. That’s how SF put me on to them.

              2. I’m not really much of a black metal guy, so I resent the implication tremendously.

                Also, woodworking.

                1. OK, how about “neutronium metal” the heaviest of the heavy metals?

                  1. That is acceptable.

                2. Mastadon rules, don’t get me wrong, but for American Metal, Lamb of God is much better.

                  That said, I’m a Katatonia/Opeth kind of metal guy (though it saddens me greatly to know that Opeth’s upcoming album is NOT GOING TO BE FUCKING METAL).

                  1. You’re incorrect. Lamb of God is terrible. Katatonia is awesome, though. And Opeth switched to prog some time go.

          2. Wow. I am so glad that I am not 15 years younger than I am.

            1. Whatevs, man. It’s all a tradeoff for the fact that they all have cell-phone videos of their high school girlfriends making out with other girls.

              No sympathy here for the yutes.

        2. GA changed their drinking age from 18 to 21 about 2 years before I started college. My RA my freshman year was a senior, he said his freshman year the dorm regularly had keggers, openly purchased with housing association funds (the money each dorm gets for “events”).

          I dont know how dry the campus is now, it wasnt in the late 80s, they were still very loose about it.

    2. Being raised by preachy ex-alkies must really suck.

      1. Worse than being raised by the most strict fundementalist. The real religious types are usually just incredibly naive and perky. Like being raised by Ned Flanders. But a reformed drunk is the worst. They are not naive and can’t get over their own self hatred for being unable to control themselves. Nothing positive or goofy about them.

        1. I don’t know if that’s ALWAYS the case, so I specified the preachy ones.

        2. But a reformed drunk is the worst.

          Nah. Reformed drunk, recently out-of-the-closet and an ex-smoker.

          1. Well at least that guy has gay sex as an outlet I suppose.

          2. Reformed drunk, recently out-of-the-closet, ex-smoker, exercise addicted vegan.

            1. Wait…that sounds kinda awesome, Warty.

              1. You must not have met many exercise addicts, Art.

                By the way, where have you been? We could have used your help in the Great Rectal War of 2011.

                1. My internet access intermittently sucks and…also, I’m not entirely sure. Strange times.

                  What’s an exercise addict like? Is that like the type of person that tears a rotator cuff, keeps going and calls everybody else a wimp from surgery?

                  1. In the Crossfit age, the self-injury of choice for discriminating exercise bulimics is rhabdomyolysis. Rotator cuff injuries and SLAP tears from the ridiculous flopping pullups they do are also popular, though.

        3. The worst are the reformed drunks who got religion in AA.

          1. ^^This^^ is exactly the kind of person I am talking about.

          2. I don’t know… I’d almost rather be around reformed alcoholics than people who think they are allergic to everything. OMG IS THERE GLUTEN IN THAT?!?

            I have food allergies, at least one deadly one too, but I just calmly ask a server to check with the cooks if I have any question about a dish. The entire restaurant industry is not trying to poison you on purpose, you paranoid nitwits.

            We actually had a student worker throw away lip balm and make a dr. appointment because it didn’t say it wasn’t gluten free on the tube after she used it.

            1. I once knew a guy who was allergic to pine nuts. When he wanted attention, he would purposefully eat them at a restaurant. I hope it’s killed him by now.

                1. I immediately thought of “Choke”, too. I need to read that.

            2. I transcribe for allergists. I am convinced they see more nutjobs than any other field.

              1. They finally convinced me to take allergy shots to see if they could get my lung capacity up, so I see the allergy nurses and PA’s twice a week. They always look like they just got a phone that their puppy was kicked to death. Poor wretches. I can’t imagine doing that all day.

                1. One of the doctors I transcribe for occasionally breaks into profanity-laced tirades with much paper-shuffling in the background. They do a lot of sighing while they dictate, too. I’m just waiting for Dr. Pottymouth to finally break down and proclaim “This bitch is NUTS.” He has announced he needed some Scotch (and then asked me not to transcribe it). Needless to say, they are my favorite group to transcribe. Way more entertaining than the oncologists.

                  1. I do think the allergies shots are helping. I’m definitely not as reactive to dogs and cats as I’ve always been, but it hasn’t done anything for my lung capacity. Hurm.

                    1. Does he think you have asthma?

                    2. They don’t really know. It’s a long story of medical intrigue.

                    3. If anyone can get you figured out, SF, it’s an allergist/immunologist 🙂

                      I found allergy shots helpful, too. My dad is an ENT doc and back in the ’80’s he decided he’d get in on the allergy shot thing and wanted a guinea pig. I had no allergy (or asthma) symptoms until my second pregnancy and that was a good 15 years after I finished shots.

                2. We’ve only got one allergist within a hundred mile radius, and we bought our house from one of his nurses.
                  Why does that matter? Soon after buying the house we cut down the pine trees out back so we could have a yard instead of a dark forest that drips pine pitch on your hair.
                  She loved those trees. Loved them dearly.
                  Loved them so much that there’s no way I’m giving her a chance to poke me with a needle.
                  No way.

              2. There is a study I read years ago (out of U of Iowa; I have no cite now) that showed a stunning almost 100% incidence of incidental clinical psychological history of one sort or another in people with “environmental allergy”.

    3. For those interested in the militarization of the police, there’s a link at the bottom of the article to a photo essay of “pot-fighting techniques” featuring the OK Bureau of Narcotics and Dangerous Drugs posing with weapons (the notes don’t say which caliber is best at fighting pot – I see M-16s and pistols on the table but you’d think birdshot out of a 12 gauge would shred plants better) and repelling out of a Huey. I can’t decide which would be funnier: if I imagine them going “wheeee!” when they jump or chanting “hut! hut! hut!” ? la Blues Brothers

      Also a picture of the world’s ugliest H3 (and that’s saying something?) seized from drug dealers.

  21. “The problem is, is that the way Bush has done it over the last eight years is to take out a credit card from the Bank of China in the name of our children, driving up our national debt from $5 trillion for the first 42 presidents ? #43 added $4 trillion by his lonesome, so that we now have over $9 trillion of debt that we are going to have to pay back ? $30,000 for every man, woman and child. That’s irresponsible. It’s unpatriotic.”

    -Senator Barack Obama, July 3, 2008

    Total national debt 1/20/09: $10,626,877,048,913.08
    Total national debt 8/19/11: $14,639,239,567,874.38

    1. It amazes me how short sighted politicians are. You would have thought Obama would have realized that since he planned to blow the bank once he got into office, he would laid off the deficit talk back in 2008. It is not like he didn’t have other things to talk about. Did he really think people would forget he said shit like that?

      1. What’s so striking about Obama is how casual he is about accusing others of being unpatriotic. Bush and Cheney did that once or twice in regards to the Iraq War, but Obama does it FAR more often than those guys did, and he does it on almost every issue.

        1. And of course when Bush and Chaney did that the media rightfully went after them. They don’t say a word about Obama. And worse still, Bush and Chaney did it about war and foreign policy stuff, which is at least big stakes stuff. Obama drops the patriot card over criticizing the Fed.

        2. “What’s so striking about Obama is how casual he is about accusing others of being unpatriotic. Bush and Cheney did that once or twice in regards to the Iraq War, but Obama does it FAR more often than those guys did, and he does it on almost every issue.”

          Samuel Johnson said it best: Patriotism is the last refuge of a scoundrel.

          1. politics is the last refuge of scoundrels

      2. He said it before any economic downturn had occurred. It was easy to say when he expected to be able to eliminate the Bush tax cuts and have no TARP or stimulus. Not saying he’s not a hypocritical POS scumbag, mind.

      3. His supporters, the only people that matter to him, already have, John.

        Remember, cognitive dissonance and a very short memory are the catalysts of partisan politics.

  22. Bill O’Reilly smears Ron Paul again.

    Yesterday evening, on his show, Bill O’Reilly claimed that his producers asked the Congressman from Texas to come for an interview, presumably after Paul had mentioned to anchor Megyn Kelly that afternoon that he “was being ignored by the media.”

    In actuallity, what Paul said was how surprised he was that the media had ignored him after winning a very close second in the Ames Straw Poll against Congresswoman, and fellow precandidate, Michelle Bachman.

    According to Bill O’Reilly, the Paul camp allegedly had not responded yet to the invitation.

    Really, Mr. O’Reilly? WHEN did your producers call the Paul camp? 10 minutes before starting the show?

    1. Sorry, Bachmann.

      One more point: Bill O’Reilly was calling Paul “a whiner,” despite the evidence presented by PEW recently, showing the number of stories per candidate and how little the Congressman was mentioned after the close 2nd win.

      1. That or maybe Paul has better things to do than go on national TV to have an idiot scream at him.

        1. Re: John,

          I’ll say! Especially Fox’s equivalent to Lawrence O’Donnell.

          Yeech!

          1. O”Reilly really isn’t a conservative. He is just an asshole. I can’t get any sort of coherent ideology from listening to him. All I get is how fabulous O’Reilly is. And of course he is thin skinned and won’t listen to anyone who challenges him.

            1. Re: John,

              O”Reilly really isn’t a conservative.

              Oh, you noticed that too? 😉

              O’Reilly is just another socialist who plays a conservative on TV.

              1. O’Reilly is a proponent of government action to achieve his desires, end of story. The fact that his desires are a bizarre mishmash of personal hangups it irrelevant.

              2. O’Reilly is a populist from the Right. One of those who believe that the politicians could make everything run smoothly if they only stopped trying to screw each other over.

            2. Refer to his lates book: “The O’Reilly Factor for Assholes” and click on the store at http://www.billoreilly.com/store

            3. “I can’t get any sort of coherent ideology from listening to him”

              I’m looking out for the folks.

        2. True, he does study economics after all. He may view the value of getting screamed at as less than doing something productive like campaigning in an early primary state.

      2. Paul finished 3rd in yesterday’s national Gallup poll, ahead of Bachmann.

    2. “Really, Mr. O’Reilly? WHEN did your producers call the Paul camp? 10 minutes before starting the show?”

      I would not be surprised. If Paul won the Republican nomination O’Reiley’s SoCon head would explode. I am sure O’Reiley hates everything Paul stands for.

      1. I think he probably hates him most for his stance on the WoD.

        1. You are probably right. How dare Ron Paul think adults have the right to control what they put in their own bodies?

    3. Bill O’Reilly is what you get when you let an Irishman sober up.

  23. It’s no Sugarfree/Jezebel link, but still amusing: “Geek girls” and the problem of self-objectification.” Patriarchy! Sex objects! Male gaze! It’s all someone else’s fault!

    1. They really have sold young women on this bullshit. I read somewhere that S.E. Cupp, the conservative talking head blogger babe finds it “creepy when men comment on her looks on the internet”.

      Really S.E? If you find it creepy men commenting on your looks, perhaps you ought to routinely go on Fox News wearing a skirt that falls three inches above your knees and sit sideways to the camera showing the entire world your legs.

      I don’t begrudge Cupp being good looking or using her looks to her advantage. But to go on national TV dressed like she does and then whine about people talking about your looks is just pathetic.

      1. “Look at me! Look at me! God, I HATE it when men regard me as a sexual object!”

        You have 1 good leg and a vagina, right?

      2. its better to be looked-over than over-looked.

      3. S.E. Cupp was on Morning Joe this morning.

        Whoa!!!!!!!

    2. I’ve been researching and thinking about cosplay for a while now, and one of the most distressing trends I’ve been grappling with is how women will choose characters, costumes, or costume constructions based on how “sexy” the costume will appear on them. This is not just a cosplay problem, but a geek problem.

      This is also not just a linguistic problem, but an anarcho-syndicalism problem.

    3. Not enough Slave Leia pictures.

      1. You have to give geek girls credit. They figured out that they could start going to comic con and doing geeky stuff and immediately go from wall flower to princess and have a ton of guys following them around. Sure the goods could be pretty odd sometimes. But the odds were very good and a lot of those guys have great paying jobs and cash.

      2. That outfit never did anything for me. Maybe because I was only six when RotJ came out.

      3. I have a Slave Leia costume.

        1. I have one for my cat

    4. The best part of that article is the discussion in the comments where the guy writes,

      “Well, if you don’t act sexy and aren’t regarded as a sex object, but you’re still accepted at the event as ‘one of the guys’, isn’t that what you’re saying you want?”

      And the chick says,

      “But I don’t wanna just be accepted and be one of the guys!”

      So once again it’s “Don’t treat me like a sex object – but don’t dare NOT treat me like a sex object, either!”

    5. When I was in college, I had to take an introductory “ethics” (read: women’s studies) as part of my general education requirements. The professor was an old second-wave feminist who was generally even-handed — she let students say their piece and didn’t mark papers down for having the wrong POV or anything — but her big hobby horse was girls showing too much skin.

      Since it was a general education course and not too hard, the class was filled with football players. She gave some lengthy lecture on how it was wrong and the product of sexism, then called on a defensive end when he raised his hand.

      “But if dey wanna show off dey li’l bodies, I ain’t complainin’.”

      Truly a man of our time.

      1. As part of an introductory engineering course, they had to cover “ethics” to cover some state education mandate.

        The prof went over a bunch of common sense things, but ran into trouble when he said engineers shouldn’t accept meals from vendors and should pay their own way.

        We had a very good looking gal in the class who snorted out loud when she heard that and then said “Are you kidding me. Looking as fine as I do, you expect me to pay for my dinner? I haven’t bought a meal in a restaurant since I was 13!”

        All the students laughed and the poor prof just put his head down and went to the next item on his ethics list.

    6. “And until we start having an intelligent conversation about it (preferably a conversation that starts with the assumption that it is a problem),…”

      Apparently, there are plenty of people including female geeks who do not see this as a problem. If you start with the assumption that this is a problem, how are you going to have an intellgent conversation with them?

      1. Well, we don’t want to introduce any risk that someone might come to the wrong conclusion, now do we.

  24. WikiLeaks releases new cables on Spain, Zimbabwe, and several other countries.

    I don’t think they’re going to get as many hits as the US. I would visit the papers from Zimbabwe only to know under what delusions those guys are operating, but Spain?? Yawn.

    1. What if they gave a scandal and nobody cared?

  25. Can’t wait to see the comments on this one:

    Kinky Friedman Endorses Rick Perry

    1. A kinky endorsing of Ricky.

      1. “Perry Gets Kinky Endorsement”

    2. We will be issuing a press release, expressing our extreme disappointment, presently.

    3. There must be a lot of hippies’ heads exploding in Austin right now.

    4. “That, sir, depends on whether I embrace your mistress or your politics.”

    5. WTF Kinky? Son I am disappoint.

    6. I agree with Rick that there are already too damn many laws, taxes, regulations, panels, committees, and bureaucrats. While Obama is busy putting the hyphen between “anal” and “retentive” Rick will be rolling up his sleeves and getting to work.

      Works for me.

    7. Wait. What?

    8. In a good example of just how weird Austin really is, apparently Kinky and Perry are pretty good friends. And that’s according to Kinky, who has no reason to lie about it.

      I actually think this reflects well on both of them. Since I worked a statehouse, I’ve been able to compartmentalize my politics, and have been friends with all sorts. I even signed Tammy Baldwin’s* ballot petition back in the day, because her girlfriend had an office next to mine and we were pals.

      *Hardcore lefty Rep from Madison.

  26. 51 percent still blame Bush.

    Unbelievable that this is working.

    1. He did sign the TARP bill so it is at least partly his fault that we are still in the Great Recession.

      1. what are we, chopped liver?

        1. Those didn’t help either. But when I think of wars I am honestly more likely to think of the lives lost. But you do have a point that there was a negative economic impact from those as well.

    2. “Both” was not an option, I take it?

  27. Kindly old Philanthropist Warren Buffett has ridden to the rescue of Bank of America. At highly favorable terms, however difficult that may be to believe.

    1. ZH on the deal. Mr. Moral Hazard Profiteer just sank $5B into BAC for 50,000 preferred shares of Bank of America BAC with a 6% dividend and a 5% redemption premium and 700 million warrants with an exercise price of $7.142857.

      QE3 will restructure/forgive all nonperforming mortgages held by BAC.

      1. Keeping in mind that BAC already has $118 billion in asset guarantees.

        1. BAC paid $425 million to get out of 118B asset guarantee.

  28. Sept 7 GOP Debate Participants Announced

    Still no Gary Johnson. Boo! Man, I am bummed that he only got one debate, in which he performed rather poorly, and is just routinely dismissed now. I’m sure they’re probably chomping at the bit to narrow it down even more though.

    1. Why is Huntsman invited?

      That ass wipe won’t get 1% but the cocksucking media keep pushing him as some kind of viable “moderate”.

  29. Anyone on the east coast and interested in progressive metal/jazz (though less jazzy recently) should check out Morglbl.

    Requisite youtube.. I am very familiar with the song, so their antics are a plus for me, though for a first time listen may be distracting.. YMMV
    Check out other youtubes as well.

    1. Cool band, thanks.

      progressive metal

      We’re all in luck, because Mastodon’s new album is coming out soon.

      1. They contributed to the unrelieved awfulness that was the Jonah Hex movie. They must perish. In flames.

    2. Very nice. I will definitely try to see them in concert.

  30. Did anyone else see the newest Gallup poll? I knew Ron Paul was popular amongst the kids, but he’s polling at 29% amongst the 18-29 year old group.

    1. If you could vote online, then that 29% would make a difference. Too bad the dinosaur demographic that has nothing to do all day but busybody and shuffle down the street to the fucking elementary school really hates him.

  31. Looks like its going to be an interesting day for sure.

    http://www.anon-stuff.at.tc

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  33. The California Government just needs more land. There are a lot of military installations out there in the desert, even though that land has been owned by people for a few generations the state will do what it must.
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