Uncle Sam's Cool New Way of Nagging You to Eat Your Vegetables
Last Thursday the U.S. Department of Agriculture unveiled MyPlate, which replaces the inscrutable MyPyramid, which replaced the much-maligned original food pyramid, as the government's go-to graphic for nagging you to eat your vegetables. The pie chart has no room for pie, although I suppose you could cobble one together from ingredients in the wedges labeled "grains" and "fruit," as long as you managed to avoid using fat or added sugar. While the 1992 pyramid included a triangle for "Fats, Oils, & Sweets" (which were confusingly placed at the pinnacle, even though we were instructed to use them "sparingly"), there is no such category on MyPlate. In fact, the plate does not even have room for dairy products, which are relegated to a saucer on the side, making it seem as if the government is urging Americans to observe Jewish dietary laws by separating meat from milk.
Visually, MyPlate is an improvement over its predecessors, which is not saying much. The 1992 food pyramid was fundamentally misconceived, since there was a natural tendency to think food groups toward the top were favored over those on the bottom, exactly the opposite of the message the USDA was trying to convey. The 2005 update addressed that problem by dividing the pyramid into vertical, color-coded wedges, which raised the question of why a pyramid should be used at all. The answer, apparently, was to give the stylized human figure on the left something to run up, thereby illustrating the importance of exercise. Michelle Obama, whose pet cause is getting her fellow Americans to eat less and exercise more, reportedly championed MyPlate, even though it takes a step backward by leaving out physical activity. Would it have been so hard to transform the pyramid jogger into a plate spinner?
One thing MyPlate has in common with MyPyramid is the first-person pronoun's implication that the government's official nutritional advice is all about personal choice. Confronted by the latest good-for-you graphic, many Americans are apt to think, "That may be Michelle Obama's plate, but it's not mine." That's assuming they take notice of it at all.
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Again I ask, why just a fork?
http://media.charlotteobserver…..od_affilia
Your link needs some adjustin’…
It’s racist against Chinese food.
No spoons?? No soup for ANYONE!!!
Goddamnit, how come everytime a Chinese puts up a wall, stupid Mongolians have to come and knock it down!?
Because knive’s are too dangerous for the proles and as for spoons…there are no spoons.
God damn I wish there was an edit button. Stupid misplaced apostrophe.
That’s actually a good point. Western diets are extremely dry compared to the rest of the world.
There should be a little soup bowl in addition to the milk glass.
The name ‘MyPlate’ just edged-out ‘Mouthbook’ apparently…
Or iHole.
But how many friends will it have?
I’d suggest any adult seriously incapable of properly feeding herself without consulting government charts should just give up on life altogether. These brightly colored charts are fine for elementary-school kids, but not for ostensible grownups.
I’d like to meet the individual gentically disposed to a balanced diet.
Jennifer, liberals don’t see ANYONE over the age of consent as “adults”. We’re all toddlers now.
Toddlers? I think you dramatically overestimate our status.
I don’t… but good point, Obama probably looks at us as if we were all under the age of three.
Especially Missus Obama.
Newborn at best. Probably fetus.
Abort! Abort!
I’m going to run with scissors in one hand, and a lawn dart in the other, stopping only to eat deep-fried butter sticks washed down with Yoo-Hoo.
The hell you will.
We’re all fetuses, and can thus be aborted if the government doesn’t want to carry us in its… territory?
We’re all toddlers now.
Toddlers with wallets. And bank accounts.
Jennifer, liberals don’t see ANYONE over the age of consent as “adults”. We’re all toddlers now.
It’s not just “liberals.” I don’t recall the USA being any more of a libertarian utopia when self-described conservatives were at the helm; the latter are every bit as contemptuous of notions like “My body is my business, not the goddamned government’s.” Given how corrupt and calcified the two-party system has become, I have serious doubts it’s possible for any decent, non-sociopathic person to be elected to any office higher than “small-town councilman or mayor.”
Can’t be statists without infantilizing the population.
Wish you posted here more often.
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
Is bourbon a vegetable or a grain? And what the fuck is protein? What happened to meat?
TOFU BABY! Protein is the politically correct term that embraces the differently-nourished.
Incomplete proteins qualify?
Beans are a part of that group, have been for a long time, so, yeah. They can’t be troubled with amino acids.
Something’s not right here.
Three of the four plate segments are plural nouns. The fourth–protein–is singular. Is there only one? Which one? Did some bureaucrat not know that “proteins” is an actual word, that there is more than one protein?
They are blinkered, thinking that you only eat one protein at a time… discounting the possibility of TRIPLE DRAGON FANTASY DELIGHT!
In short, the US government hates Chinese food.
It hates bastardized americanized chinese food.
I doubt people in China actually eat beef/chicken/shrimp fried rice.
Does the Most Dangerous Protein ring any bells?
Its yeast poop…delicious yeast poop…with sugar.
Well, I don’t see yeast poop on there at all. How can I take seriously a chart without bourbon on it, or, at least, agave-derived consumables?
What about grape-squeezin’s?
Fruit? Maybe? If not, does that mean no hot sauce or balsamic vinegar?
I was talking about wine. But since wine has alcohol, it’s probably not kosher to the Obama Food Patrol.
You will never take the balsamic vinegar from me, ProL. Never.
I dropped a bottle of it last night and nearly cried, because it meant I had none for dinner.
Mr. FIFY,
Understood, but for me, the loss of vinegar would be even more traumatic.
Hot sauce is a vegetable. Heck, the last time I read a salsa label, it claimed 2% of your USRDA of Vitamin C in 2 tablespoons.
200 tablespoons of salsa, and it’s goodbye scurvy!
Seems more like a fruit to me.
Well, on the one hand, it’s usually got peppers of some sort, and peppers are a vegetable. On the other hand, there’s usually some sort of vinegar involved, and the vinegars usually used are fruit-based.
I’m thinking we have an illegal combination of items from the plate, which means it gets banned.
Pepper are a berry, and therefore a fruit.
FOOD P’WNED!
Actually, peppers are, technically, a fruit, aren’t they? Good
Oops, too slow on hitting “submit” on my correction.
Vegetable is a culinary term. Scientifically, what we call vegetables are usually either fruits (tomatoes, bell peppers, etc.) leaves (salads), roots (tubers such as potatoes, carrots, beats, etc.) or sometimes stems/flowers (broccoli, cauliflower, celery).
If it can’t be categorized, then I’m just going to ignore it and go back to the Food/Not-Food categorization I used as an infant.
Bourbon is grain, tequila is vegetable, and vodka could be either. Rum and gin are fruit. Beer is grain and wine is fruit. So just have a glass of wine, a shot of tequila, and a milk stout, and you’re covered. Oh, and some tofu.
Say, is there a soy-based alcohol? There must be.
Gluten-free beer is the devil’s foamy lactation by-product.
I’m just sayin’… it ain’t beer.
Yup. We’re good to go.
Fuck it… I’d just give up drinking.
I refuse to endorse these products.
I work in a liquor store, and you wouldn’t believe the people who ask stoopid gluten-based questions.
Sorghum is NOT a beer-building product. Sorry, just can’t bring myself to even think that way.
Sorghum beer is odd, but drinkable. It’s boring as hell though. You can’t get all the wonderful nuances without barley, wheat, etc.
Nope, gonna have to disagree, Joe. I’ve tried four brands of gluten-free “beer”, and all of them were hideously un-tasty.
I’ve tried two: Redbridge and Bard’s. I thought the Bard’s was decent.
I’m the weirdo who doesn’t particularly like any beer: I don’t like carbonated beverages.
Note the round-cornered rectangle. They’ve caught up with 1984.
There is no need for dairy to be involved at all in the plate. Milk is not very good for you, and should simply be relegated as an optional food item.
They didn’t have a box checked for “Calcium substitute”.
This whole “MyPlate” is a government welfare for useless bureaucrats.
HEY! I LIKE MILK! DRINK MILK OR A DAIRY FARMER COME TO YOUR HOUSE AND RAPE YOUR MOTHER. MILK CHOCOLATE IS THE BEST CHOCOLATE FOR PREVENTING RAPE. A COW IN THE HAND IS WORTH A SISTER IN THE BUSH. *wink*
Chocolate milk = raaaaacist!
Always knew Hershey’s was for sisterfuckers.
Do sorority sisters count?
Ohhh, yeah. HELL, yeah.
Hey, Anthony, we need to talk.
Strike, eh? [cracks his knuckles; they snap painfully]
Ouch! My bones are so brittle. But I always drink plenty of…
[picks up milk carton, reads it] “Malk”?
— Now with Vitamin R!
Fat Tony! You promised me “Dog” or higher!
I don’t get it. Everyone loves rats, but they don’t want to drink the rats’ milk?
Well you gotta have milk – else where you gonna put the GUMMIKNT CHEESE? Hmmm?
Lactose intolerance by race
1. East Asian 90-100%
2. Indigenous (North America) 80-100%
3. Central Asian 80%
4. African American (North America) 75%
5. African (Africa) 70-90%
6. Indian (Southern India) 70%
7. French (Southern France) 65%
8. Ashkenazi Jew (North America) 60-80%
9. Balkans Region 55%
10. Latino/Hispanic (North America) 51%
11. Indian (Northern India) 30%
12. Anglo (North America) 21%
13. Italian (Italy) 20-70%
14. French (Northern France) 17%
15. Finnish (Finland) 17%
16. Austrian (Austria) 15-20%
17. German (Germany) 15%
18. British (U.K.) 5-15%
I’m lactose intolerant and proud. The dairy association can kiss my gas.
Hey, I’m mostly 17 and 18. Great, bring on the milk products!
Hear me, Earthlings! Your days are numbered!
Italy 20-70%
Nice, useful measurement there.
I’m guessing the Swiss end of Italy is much more tolerant than the Sicily end.
Finally, scientific proof that Aryans are superior (dairy consumers)!
I’d rather die than stop eating cheese. But I’ll probably never drink another glass of milk.
Same here, actually. I eat cheese…but milk? Nope. I can’t even remember the last time I bought a carton of milk.
I thought I was lactose intolerant, but it turned out to be the dead gerbils causing the problem.
Well, that’s it. I guess I have no Ashkenazi Jewish heritage.
You are proud to be defeated by cow breasts?
Anyone else think “grains” have always been way overrepresented in these silly diagrams? You don’t think politics enters in it, do you?
Atkins managed to cut portions by atleast 20% though
They certainly have. Many people get away with not eating any grains at all and they do fine.
“Grains”, “Dairy” and “Meat” (or “Protein” or whatever they are calling it these days) seem to be awfully cozy with whoever made this chart. The only way I think you could defend it would be to say the pyri-plates were manipulated on purpose to make it look more like the meals people actually ate rather than the ideal.
If by “grains” you’re referring to malted barley, I would say no, it’s definitely NOT overrepresented. If anything, it’s UNDERrepresented.
+1. The biggest problem with the guidelines is not the visual representation. The problem is that they are BS. There is no persuasive evidence that fat is bad for you, that starches are good for you, or that people need to eat a high carb low fat diet. Such evidence that does exist tends to suggest the opposite.
Gary Taubes’ Good Calories, Bad Calories has a great account of how some leftists and hippies with influence in Congress convinced the McGovern group that meat was unhealthy. The grain industry lobbied very heavily during the process too (still does). The net result is the high carb/low fat guidelines we still have today, in spite of lots of evidence they are completely wrong.
Gary Taubes? Leftist Hippies? This is like Fox News, except its Libtards. Meat is costly to produce. The USA is running out of ideas, corn syrup and happy meals have fed most of America the past 30 years.
The food plate is not for you dumbass.
The pyramid was a clear Illuminati plot.
Say “Annuit c?ptis” and see what happens.
The top section represented the all-seeing eye and pure power, which is sweet and makes you fat.
When you reach the 33rd degree a new chart is revealed showing bacon as a separate entity hovering above the remainder of the pyramid.
The bacon is the halo around the detached pinnacle.
That’s exactly what we want you to think…
I always thought of the pyramid as representing relative amounts of the different foods, not as a hierarchy. If having the sweets at the top confuses people (in which case I wonder how they were able to feed themselves at all, let alone in a prescribed way) then flip it over and call it the Food Yield Sign.
Why is the protein purple?
At least it isn’t green.
Protein Green is people! 8^O
This is all wrong. purple is a fruit
Where is fat? You need to eat fat. This thing makes it seem like sugar/starch and protein are all people should eat (I bet they recommend skim milk too). And there is still too much carbohydrate.
Remember when there were four food groups? It didn’t tell you what you needed to know about nutrition, but at least it made some sense.
Yeah, didn’t meat and dairy used to be the same group?
Oy! What an abomination that was!
I think dairy was still its own group (a side effect of the FDA’s dual mission of regulating and promoting agriculture, I think). If I properly recall the catchy tune from Saturday morning cartoon time the four were: meat and eggs, dairy, fruit/veg. and grains/cereals.
The plates are made of fat.
“Stop eating your plate! Eat the food too!”
Where is fat?
You still get that only at McDonalds
Hey! Our shakes have PLENTY of fat!
Have you even been outside lately? Fat is EVERYWHERE. Zombies are gonna eat good in the USA.
Fine, but what am I to do before I become a zombie? I need all the calories I can get.
Zombies eat brains…I would argue they are in a severe drought at this time.
Brains are mostly fat.
I find it confusing that the portions are not actually shaped like pie chart wedges. Though I see that they wanted this to look like a Chinette plate, it’s hard to tell if Proteins is larger than Fruits. Same thing with Grains vs. Vegetables.
Fail.
Pie chart
Another reason for FAIL is that not all meals are separated into starch/protein/fruit/veg. What do you do with a slice of pizza, a slab of moussaka, or a bowl of jambalaya? And where do you fit the beer?
And government eliminated dessert altogether. What facism is this!?
If the old charts confused people, then the obvious solution (obvious to people in government, that is) is to start afresh and create a new chart that’s even less informative.
Suddenly, I have an inexplicable craving for play-doh.
If Romney becomes president, he’ll make sure that the ethanol food group is adequately represented. The good farmers of Iowa deserve nothing less.
He won’t, so don’t sweat it.
Looks like our crazy friends at the USDA have never heard of the food chain.
They aren’t crazy, just ignorant.
I love how the Nanny Staters think: “they wouldn’t be fat if we just could find the graphic design magic bullet!”
Where is the foie gras part of the plate? Or the sea urchin (uni) part? Or the booze?
No, no, this doesn’t make any sense at all.
I hate sea urchin (at least the raw kind), but I think it’s “protein.”
You hate sea urchin? As if I needed any further proof of your hideous palate after the deep dish unthinkableness.
What else don’t you like, you heathen? Eel? Bear? Alligator?
Gator is right tasty, Epi.
Yes it is. So is bear. And eel.
I like eels.
Except as meals.
And the way they feels.
http://www.angryflower.com/bearca.html
Yeah, it’s a texture thing, I think.
Eel is fine, like alligator, haven’t had bear.
The texture is the best part of uni!
De gustibus non est disputandum.
Exactly, ProL; never dispute matters of taste with me.
I’m sending the Centurion over to explain Latin to you more precisely.
Uni = Japanese baby shit (but good)
Bear is spongy and sort of sweet. Weird and not that enjoyable.
Total lack of any fried foods. My suspicions started after noting this glaring omission.
Mmmmm – you haven’t lived until you’ve had fried haggis.
Seriously – I had that in Glasgow. If I hadn’t been drinking, I’d have probably had an instant artery cloggage and died right there.
It was DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERISHous….
I had a lot of beer in Kansas years ago, and got talked into eating fried bull testicles.
That is to say, I had a LOT of beer.
I’m sure I’ve brought it up before, but when I was in Scotland I really enjoyed haggis. Why a country that enjoys hot dogs and meatloaf should cringe at haggis is beyond me.
If you need booze to be listed on a government chart in order to drink it, then you deserve to be sober.
Can we immolate all of the useless bureaucrats that spent untold millions of dollars developing and promoting this crap now? I look forward to the day that the government can’t afford to pay them anymore and they have to try and find a real job.
SOYLENT GREEN IS BUREAUCRATS!!!
Well, that *would* be a good way to make ’em useful…
This is the type of thing NPR drools over. There will be hours of interviews with gov’t employees about how they came to their decisions and why.
Your tax dollars at work.
not my income tax dollars, anyway…
Oh, your turn is comin’, poor people. Once we realize we can’t confiscate 100% of everything over, say, fifty grand a year in income, we’re comin’ after YOU.
We’re going to report you for encouraging the death and consumption of Democrats, “Mr. FIFY”.
Just as soon as we group-fellate Mr. Soros, that is.
Yes
My only reaction to the video of the first lady’s launching of myplate was thinking that I would totally do her.
But she looks like a horse, but I suppose if a man can love a sheep, a man can love a horse.
Red Dead Redemption has a mission in there to demonstrate this.
Granted, it’s not a very high bar to clear, but I don’t think that there have been many first ladies who are more attractive than Michelle Obama. Jackie Kennedy is the only one from the photographic age that comes to mind.
? Enjoy your food, but eat less.
? Avoid oversized portions.
Physical activity simply means movement of the body that uses energy. Walking, gardening, briskly pushing a baby stroller, climbing the stairs, playing soccer, or dancing the night away are all good examples of being active.
Words of wisdom from the site. I understand the logo cost $2M to develop. How much for the whole(-grain) shebang?
Who else thinks a group of five-year-olds with a few Fisher-Price toys could’ve come up with something at least as good or better–or at least something that didn’t cost TWO FUCKING MILLION DOLLARS!
The choice of web address is absolutely pathetic. Highschoolers could do better.
choosemyplate.gov
Why not some of these?
nutrition.gov
food.gov
dipshittery.gov
uselessasshats.gov
wearefuckingyouwithyourownmoney.gov
Obey.gov
Rowdy Roddy Piper is all out of bubble gum.
Imagine how big the Glue and Booger food groups would be.
BTW, forgot to share this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v…..r_embedded
Oops, I was wrong, it didn’t cost $2 fucking million, it cost $2.9 FUCKING MILLION!
http://online.wsj.com/article/…..62678.html
See that’s where you are wrong. In government parlance, 2.9M gets truncated to 2M. Standard bureaucratic accounting method.
Almanian’s advice to achieve a “healthy” weight:
Eat less, exercise more. Eat stuff you like, not stuff you hate. Be reasonable in your proportions – you know what that is.
Works EVERY time.
That is all.
Can’t somebody just force me to be good?
Why won’t somebody do something about how fat I am? 🙁
Have a little lunch, if it’s not too much trouble.
Eat more, exercise less is also a great way to achieve a healthy weight. Eat more fats, do less cardio.
Say, all of these food groups are separate, with dairy not even on the same plate. Does that mean we have to eat all of these foods separately?
Don’t be stupid. Government workers will come by your house–free of charge and while you are at work so as to not disrupt your schedule–and replace all your regular dinner wear with segmented plates and confiscate your spoons/knives/bowls/etc.
Have fun eating soup, you dipshit.
So black beans and rice is right out.
Exactly. It is impossible to tell whether that is protein, grain or vegetables. Subversive food.
Anti-American.
“Donuts?!? I don’t like ethnic food!”
So, how does this work? I have pasta in the grain area and a bowl of marinara sauce in the, what, fruit area? Do I have to use different utensils for each?
Yes, and you should make sure you color code your silverware too, and keep it sorted in the dishwasher.
This guy has had his own food chart for a while now. It’s not as colorful but I still recommend it.
They covers pig on America’s Test Kitchen yesterday. The smoked ribs looked awesome!
cover = covered
I don’t not enjoy ribs, but they are my least favorite food you can get from the animal. So much work for too little payoff.
I’m no dietician, but speaking from personal experience, I highly recommend that chart.
I prefer the food chart recommended to me by my fairy godmother.
Hey, what about US?!
I must be missing something. If this is the plate Michelle wants everyone to think of, I’m just not seeing where two chili covered hot dogs exactly fits on it. You know, like the couple that Skippy wolfed down during his stopover in Shy town recently. . .
The pie chart has no room for pie, although I suppose you could cobble one together…
I see what you did there…
I could give less than half of a fuck what the government wants me to eat. Who is the intended audience for this vague bit of edification? When you’re a kid learning about this shit in school, you eat whatever the fuck your parents serve you (not cool, vegetarian parents). When you’re a grownup, you eat whatever the fuck you want (thanks, BBQ pork I just ate).
Also, I may have posted this before, but Canada had a Food Rainbow. Just to gay it up a bit. NTTAWWT.
Sweet fucking monkey shit cock, that is funny.
People from outside of North America ask me, “What’s the difference between Canada and the United States, really?” My answer, after seeing that graphic? “Canada is the gay twin of the United States.”
For more gov’t health propaganda, YouTube “Body Break.” The gayness is all consuming. (And I am not able to link to it for some reason.)
“For people four years and over.”
Not “older.” “Over.”
What the.
You see, after socialized medicine really gets going, the unhealthy personal decisions of you and your fellow taxpayers rest upon each other. Smoking, drinking, heroin and fried chicken–why, you’re practically stealing from society with the additional costs you’re legally forced to incur upon the rest of the sad sacks suffering through the “right” diet and lifestyle.
Actually, as an infographic to show proportions and priority, that works pretty well, better than a pyramid.
Why do they call this “MyPlate” and “MyPyramid”? Since it’s one-size-fits-all it really should be YourPyramid and YourPlate.
Well, they wanted iPlate, but Steve said no.
How much did this shit cost?
It’s not a saucer, it’s a glass of milk, on the side.
This review was way too snide. Sorry, but understanding of nutrition has come a long way since the phrase “bread-pushers” got used.
So are eggs good for me or bad for me, now?
Only the protein parts are good. Everything else is FORBIDDEN! WHAT IS NOT EXPLICITLY ON THE PLATE IS NOT PERMITTED! NEIN!
Plankton OK?
Some plankton are plants, some are protein. So long as you place them on the proper part of the plate, you’re fine.
Yes. Yes, they are.
And you wouldn’t be able to tell how far nutrition has come from this piece of shit chart.
I don’t think it’s s hard to understand the reasoning behind this campaign – aparently no one here reads Men’s or Women’s Health, which has been saying this stuff for years.
This blog sucks.
Men’s and Women’s Health: bastions of nutritional science.
Anyone else remember that short-lived 1980s sci-fi series, Otherworld? The first city they lived in had a supermarket with generic white cans of “Good Food”. We need that.
I posted this in another thread, but I think it might be appropriate for this one as well:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v…..re=related
I wonder how much this cost us…
It is so sad that the department of agriculture can not come to terms with its repetitive failures and irrelevance. Simply abolishing this retarded exercise would be too much like admitting defeat.
The grains at the bottom would be the foundation that you built the rest of the meal on, just sprinkling a bit of fat on the top.
Sad face.
At least the original food guide pyramid had the virtue of that huge block of grains on the bottom that you could point to and say, “See that? That’s the same stuff that they feed to cows and pigs to make them fat as fast as possible, and your body responds the same way.”
Stick with real food and the diet we evolved to eat over 2 million years. Still amazed that Reason hasn’t caught on to paleo, given the strong representation of libertarians among the thought leaders (e.g. Art De Vany, Drs. Michael & Mary Eades, Richard Nikoley, Robb Wolf, etc.).
Don’t forget Mark’s Daily Apple. That guy is pretty libertarian–especially considering he lives in Malibu!
To go along with your first statement, farmers feed pigs saturated fats like tropical oils to slim down at the end of the “feeding”. Americans have a taste for lean meat and how do you get a pig lean? Feed it saturated fat.
Also the guy from the Fathead movie is pretty libertarian and self-teaching himself nutrition.
Yes and yes. For those who haven’t seen it, Fat Head was a brutal takedown of Spurlock’s “Supersize Me.” It included quite a bit of commentary by Reason’s very own Jacob Sullum. Free on Hulu, also on Netflix.
If by paleo diet you mean borderline malnutrition with the constant threat of starvation then I’d say you’re on to something. She’s not anorexic she’s just on a paleo diet.
I like that we moved toward a plate icon; however, I still think many Amerians are going to mess this up! I demonstrated 10 ways this model could make you FAT in my blog post today ? http://www.bitchinnutrition.com. Try to identify them for a chance to win a FREE Starbucks gift card!
I wish we just kept the food pyramid.