Modest Gibbs Montage: I'm Not a Economist, a Lawyer, or Good at Math
As White House spokesman Robert Gibbs heads out the door, Politico has put together montage of all the things Gibbs has said he is not while answering press queries:
Among them, frequent mentions that he is not an economist, a lawyer, or good at math. The clips offer what seems like a pleasing display of modesty in a prominent political figure.
Unfortunately, the word most frequently cropped out of these clips right after Gibbs' disclaimers about credentials is probably "but."
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That little twerp isn't fit to shine Ron Ziegler's shoes.
-jcr
He should have begain each statement with "DAMMIT JIM!". Would have been much more entertaining.
Dammit, Jim! I'm a press secretary, not a chief medical officer.
During the hagiomania that the left experienced during the Obama election, some geeks were projecting their Trekkiness upon the Great Emptiness. So they'd have loved such a statement from the Press Secretary.
DeForrest Kelley for Press Secretary!
Too bad he's not available. McCoy's crotchetiness would work really well in that job right about now.
"Dammit, you're asking for the impossible! If we cut the budget now, the patient will die!!"
Unfortunately, the word most frequently cropped out of these clips right after Gibbs' disclaimers about credentials is probably "but."
Unfortunately, the phrase that most frequently should be added right after Gibbs' disclaimers about credentials is probably "but neither is anyone else in this Administration."
Gibbs was probably the only member of that administration who wasn't an attorney.
"I'm not a Chinese historian."
You will be soon.
lol
but I am a bullshitter...
What's the point again?
Slow news day? Still hung over from the cruise?
Don't you need to work on your daddy issues or something?
I don't have "people skills". I don't "smell good". I don't have "good hygiene"...
and maybe I don't "bathe regularly"...
Bennett Vrauer for Press Secretary!
and maybe I've never had "sex with a woman"
And maybe I still "pop whiteheads with a compass I used in high school."
And maybe I still "pop whiteheads with a compass I used in high school."
The fundamental problem with White House Spokesmen/Press Secretarys is that they act directly against the interests of the citizen-taxpayers who pay their bloated wages.
The job of a White House Press Secretary is to make the President look good ... by trumpeting good news & ignoring/downplaying bad news.
The job is to deceive the public , like any other "public-relations" job in the private sector.
However, when that public is actually paying your salary -- that government PR job is unethical at its root.
If a president wants a PR flack & ... he should hire one at his own expense.
by trumpeting good news & ignoring/downplaying bad news.
You have it backward. Bad news requires more spending/programs/regulations to correct all the badness and justify the Administration's existence.
There was a time when I would have laughed if somebody suggested to me that there existed, somewhere, a man who could make Scott McClellan look like a fucking genius.
If Jimmy McMillan was press secretary, he would be much more positive.
"I AM a Karate expert!"
I'm not an economist, a lawyer, or good at math, but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night.
+1
WITH ME:-)
SASQUATCH MAKE FRESH NEW HOLE. MAN NEEDS 2 HOLES. ONE TOO BORING.
Was his next line "...but I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night"?
Aw, crap.
"... but I am the guy who's gonna feed you massive quantities of bullshit for another year or so until the shame gets to me and they replace me with a new flunky willing to lie on behalf of sociopaths."
Gibbs is an expert at one thing: making due on a "modest" $174,000/year. Let Gibbs stand as a shining example in our new drive for global competitiveness. Yes kids, you too can earn 3 times the median family income despite having lived on this planet for 40+ years and, in that time, having developed no expertise in anything.
All press Press Sec. meetings should be conducted under a continuous barrage of paintballs. I'm betting if this policy was in place there would be 99% less bullshit.