Reason Morning Links: Uranium, Barbiecams, and the Unabomber


NEXT: Bad Touch

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  1. Cool footage from a RC plane doing fly-bys of the Brooklyn Bridge and Statue of Liberty. Surprisingly the gov’t was ok with the unnanounced flights.

    1. Well if they were okay with Obama’s Air Force One fly-bys around the time of his inauguration they can’t make a huge to-do about an RC plane.

    2. I’d like to think I had something to do with that.

      1. You are nothing compared to jihad Barbie.

  2. All Texas Rangers (lawmen, not ball-players) are now honorary Chuck Norrises

  3. I can’t post the link to Chuck Norris being named an honorary Texas Ranger? Fuck you squirrels. I hope Chuck Norris kicks your little rodent heads off.

    1. Chuck Norris is not an honorary Texas Ranger, he is THE Texas Ranger.

      And now his endorsement of Huckabee will be even more impressive.

      It’s all coming together…

      1. Actually, I think Rangers are all now honorary Chuck Norrises.

        1. That’s way too much power to be wielded by one organization.

          1. Chuck Norris is the right people.

  4. So South Korea agrees to an FTA with the country giving it a nuclear umbrella and an aircraft carrier group to protect it from its crazy neighbor the week their country gets shelled after rejecting the same pact the first time?

    Coincidence, I’m sure.

    1. So they want another Managed Trade Pact and in return the US public will be stuck with the bill in money and blood in defending South Korea which has twice the population and far more then ten times the GDP of North Korea. This will allow South Korea to get away with just spending 2% of GDP on defense while the US public is stuck with spending more then 4% GDP on defense.

      I see no reason to waste a single penny defending South Korea nor risk a single drop of blood over it and they can take their Managed Trade Pact (fake free trade pact) and stick it where the sun does not shine.

      1. Better yet I see a customer for some nice military grade weaponry so they can defend themselves. No need for us to do it.

        America world police Fuck Yeah!

    2. Representatives for the technology and entertainment industries praised the Obama administration on Friday for finalizing the trade agreement for South Korea that should allow American companies more access to the Korean market.

      Not that it really matters anymore, considering all that’s been done already, but can he even do this? I thought only Congress had the authority to write trade agreements/make treaties. Again, I know my question will end up sounding way more rhetorical than serious, but come on.

      1. Thje executive branch negotiates treaties that then require Senate approval.

        They didn’t require civics or US government in your high school?

        1. We didn’t cover important things like that because I took American Government in 2000 so everyone wanted to focus on how George Bush was screwing over Al Gore. Sorry.

          1. Had I been teaching that class, gB, I would have focused on how George Bush and Al Gore were screwing over America.

            Then again, if I were a teacher, I’d be getting fired for not spewing out liberal claptrap, so it’s a moot point.
            Fun to think about, though.

  5. But law enforcement sources close to the investigation into the doll tell ABC News that Barbie dolls have been known to be a used by sexual predators looking for ways to attract their young victims.

    Are you fucking kidding me? Best we just ban Barbies, no wait, better yet, ban ALL toys, because they can be used to lure children!!!

    Fucking nonsense. This is what the FBI spends its time on?

    1. This is what the FBI spends its time on?

      Only when there’s time left after prosecuting adult filmmakers.

      1. And surveilling rappers.

      2. And setting up faux-terror cells. Do you know how hard it is to run an organization populated by the kind of idiots who would join the FBI Terror Network?

        1. At least they got their anthrax man.

        2. Don’t forget the ongoing search for Jimmy Hoffa.

          1. They used him to get the teamsters to plant the WTC explosives.

    2. We need to ban candy as well. I hear that’s used a lot.

      1. And you guys are always whining about unintended consequences. Put that in your pipe and smoke it if you were allowed to smoke!

      2. How about putting warning labels on vans?

        1. better yet warning labels on kids!

    3. Actually, the sheriff’s deputy in the article just says the FBI issued the memo so crime scene investigators would recognize Barbie as another media source like traditional cameras and not be overlooked. But nice overreaction.

      1. Someone out there is going to call for a ban, I predict.

        1. Besides me, that is.

          1. Probably. Fight that fight, not this one.

            1. You’re right. I misspoke; my concern is the way it is reported, i.e., this Video Barbie is a known child pornographer tool, as opposed to the actual story, which is that investigators need to be aware that some dolls have video cameras and should be picked up as evidence. But, I suppose that’s why the FBI didn’t actually release the document.

              That part you quote is the very last part of the story, which shows how the hyped-up media report distorts things.

              1. Good points, all.

              2. My concern is with Barbie vis-a-vis Lesbian culture:



    4. Facebook cartoon character campaign ‘nothing to do with the NSPCC’, charity says

      However, disturbingly, rumours are now sweeping the net that the campaign is actually a smokescreen for paedophiles hoping to narrow down which users are children.

      Better just ban Facebook as well.

      1. Wow, I had no idea so many of my friends are actually pedophiles!

      2. i could see how pedophiles would think it was easier to find children by replacing pictures of the actual children with cartoon characters.

        a lot easier than looking at their ages which are already posted there

    5. better yet, ban ALL toys,

      …and puppies. We gotta do it for the kids. Think about the kids, Man.

      1. Wouldn’t it be easier to just ban kids?

        That’s the real problem, man, all those sexy children!

        1. While not an outright ban, China’s done pretty well in limiting births to one per family.

          1. But doen’t that promote incest?

    6. Well of course some abusers have given children Barbie Dolls, because most child abuse is committed by a parent of the victim! (Also, incidentally, more often by the mother than by the father, if you include the non-sexual abuse that is statistically more harmful than sexual abuse.)

      There’s a bunch of bullshit out there, but try this on for a comparison to what you “know”.

      1. Also, incidentally, more often by the mother than by the father

        But it’s still the father’s fault.

    1. Suffering a bit from Yugoslav War withdrawal syndrome perhaps?

    2. I’m not comfortable with the environmental impacts, Your Honor.

  6. “Will Texas rule the death penalty unconstitutional?”

    Are’nt Texas judges elected? I doubt they will rule so then, and if they do that judge will not survive the next election…

    1. You’re correct on all counts.

  7. I have a question for the reason lawyers (thought this while reading the mortgage thread, but more appropriate for an open thread).

    Proposed: The legal profession would be a better place if the failure rate for the bar exam was approximately equal to that of the CPA exam.

    The only counter I could see is that there are plenty of accountants that arent CPAs and there are jobs for them because CPA isnt necessary. But I dont see a problem with a bunch of paralawyers doing the grunt work billing $30 per hour instead of $150.

    1. BTW, CPA pass rate is about 49%.

      1. Looks like state bar exam pass rates are generally in 75-90 percent range.

        1. State bar also takes 3 years of college. You can take the CPA with just a few grad level courses in some states.

          1. Well, I have a problem with that too. Get rid of the stupid college requirement and make the test harder. Of course, if lots of non-law school grads took the test the rate will fall anyway, but I doubt enough.

            I read a Madison bio years ago, he borrowed the books (from Jefferson, IIRC) to study to become a lawyer. After a short time, he decided he wasnt cut out to be a lawyer and sent the books back.

            Hmmm….maybe that is why lawyers seem to have so must disdain for the constitution.

            1. I actually agree that people should be able to sit for bar without having to go to an “accredited law school.” If they can pass the test who cares?

              1. I actually agree that people should be able to sit for bar without having to go to an “accredited law school.” If they can pass the test who cares?

                To my knowledge, Virginia still allows “law readers.” I.e., you can self-study your way through the bar exam without a degree from an accredited law school. They are very rare anymore these days, though, because most other states require a degree. If you’re just going to practice locally in VA, though, it’s a way to go.

                I seem to recall a story about a year ago about an older woman who passed the bar as a law reader.

                Of course Virginia is much more steeped in tradition than most states.

            2. It should be treated as a trade, as it was prior to accredited schools.

            3. There are already tons of licensed attorneys doing paralegal gruntwork for $30/hour. The problem isn’t in licensing, it’s in training. Law schools teach students to think like lawyers, not to actually practice law day-to-day. They leave the training to employers. Because there too many lawyers and not enough jobs, there are vast numbers of licensed attorneys without the skills or confidence to take on their own clients, even at a cut rate.

              1. “Law schools teach students to think like lawyers”

                Best reason I can think of to close down law schools.

          2. That’s only because they won’t let you sit for the test. I’m sure you could learn enough of the material to pass without it.

    2. CPAs are going to suffer the same problem as JDs pretty soon. Schools are pumping them out at dizzying rates. Of course, the government may pump out enough arbitrary legislation to keep them busy.

      If you want to compare getting a JD to a high failure rate entry exam system pick the CFA exams.

      1. The larger firms will continue to snatch up the most promising talent, and the small firms will be able to hire more trainable prospects, as opposed to veterans who cannot (or choose not) to keep up with the large firms’ regimens.

        The real story is that with all the deregulation of the 2000s it’s shocking that there’s such a heavy need for CPAs……

        1. Deregulation like SarbOx? There are scores of accountants that can thank SarbOx for their jobs.

          1. I know, I was kidding around – in the same vein as Bush was a great deregulator.

        2. Bryan cave spent two years paying their prospects and telling them next year. Those were some of the top grads from some of the best schools.

          What deregulation in 2000? Was that sarcasm? The reporting requirements for financials got nothing but worse and the tax code got more complex.

          1. Yes sarcasm. Damn text and its lack of tone and inflection.

            1. I thought so, it’d take a real winner to say that with a straight face and your posts are usually far above that level.

    3. Paralegals do all the work, anyway. Lawyers just sign their names and stand around and look pretty.


    In other news David Frum is still a douchbag.

    1. That article reads more like a blurb for his book than anything else.

  9. I don’t know what the big deal is with Iran and yellow cake. My mom made it all the time, frankly chocolate cake with chocolate frosting is much better.

    1. Those barbarians probably have that white frosting on their yellow cake [shudder]

      1. Cake nazi. You probably want legislation stopping the practice of white frosting on yellow cake. Don’t you! Admit it.

        1. No cake for you!

          1. Oh please, let him eat cake.

        2. I do, I do! This scourge must end, for the children!

      2. Confettie cake, for the win

        1. Where the hell did that e in “confetti” come from?? Damn gnomes in my keyboard

          1. Dan Quayle, I’m guessing.

    2. Boston Cream Pie

      1. Chicken pot, chicken pot, chicken pot pieeeeeeeeeee. . .

        1. Best episode of Just Shoot Me ever.

    3. Just let Michelle Hussein O’Bama find out someone’s having cake, and she’ll shut that shit down, pronto.

      1. I can’t even watch my tween shows on Disney Channel without her fat ass coming on and lecturing about nutrition.

    4. We can have our yellowcake and eat it, too!

  10. “American and South Korean negotiators agree to a trade pact.”

    In your face N. Korea!

    1. H_0: MNG = Chip Bok

      p-value: 0.007

      1. That should be a not-equals. This is why peer review is essential.

        1. It’s ok, no one here is a statistician anyway.

  11. Man, somebody was asking for $154,000 for a one and a half acre parcel of land in western Montana?

    I can’t imagine for the life of me why the greedy MFer didn’t get any takers.

    1. Damn. I live in rural South Jersey, and land is going for $80,000 an acre.

      1. Take a look at what a quarter acre goes for in Corolla, North Carolina.

      2. Uh yeah, because land in W. MT is actually beautiful as opposed to South Jersey where the land is simply a dumping station for chemical and human waste.

    1. Love the picture there, because it’s true: practically the entire non-tropical part of the northern hemispshere is already freezing its ass off and shoveling out of snowstorms, just like the last couple of brutal winters.

      What I can’t figure out is why in the world a supposedly “libertarian” journal like Reason would have a guy on staff who is dedicated to shilling for the global warming bullcrap, when most normal people have figured out by now that it’s a giant scam, and nothing but a stalking horse for even bigger government control over the economy.

      1. It’s snowing so there’s no global warming!

      2. What I can’t figure out is why in the world a supposedly “libertarian” journal like Reason…

        Close enough: drink!

      3. What I can’t figure out is why a supposedly “libertarian” journal like Reason would have a guy on staff who is dedicated to taking a dispassionate look at an issue instead of toeing some party lion like every other journalist writing on the subject.

          1. Sorry “line” – which then obviates your apology, leaving only your mixed idiomatic expression to confuse us.

            1. There’s a standing joke around here about “towing the lion” because the phrase is so often misused.

              1. Yes, perhaps a reminder that “toeing the line” is the correct version of the saying should be posted once a month. Just to keep us from screwing up in the real world.

              2. “There’s a standing joke around here about ‘towing the lion'”

                Oh, that’s very different….Never mind.

        1. Well put, CN. I’ll forgive your insufficiently mangled metaphor.

  12. The MPAA’s selective war on cunnilingus

    Meanwhile, Black Swan, which features a scene wherein Mila Kunis’s character performs oral sex on Natalie Portman’s character received an R rating.

    I’ll be in my bunk.

    1. Fandango here I come!

    2. I’ve always been an Aronofsky fan.

    3. From the comments: Ryan could just look at my shame cave really intensely from that position and I’d be really in to it. Not even gonna lie.

      That’s you, isn’t it, SF?

      1. I have no shame topography, concave or convex.

        1. Only because you have no shame in general…

    4. (and probably dozens of horny 15 year old boys lining up for tickets).

      And dozens of horny middle aged men, as well. Probably more so.

      1. Ew. I’d rather think of the 15-year-olds, thank you.

        1. Go on…

    5. I see nothing wrong with encouraging hot girl-girl action while simultaneously discouraging that which our own lives are a pale imitation of.

      I paid for fantasy, goddammit! Not some reminder of how paltry my own life is.

      1. Very close to my wife’s argument about the overuse of attractive people in TV and movies:

        “If I wanted to watch ugly people, I’d go to the mall.”

    6. This apparently true story is more horrific, to a certain extent, than SF fictional porn.

        1. Not the first time; I’m sure it won’t be the last.

    7. Really now. I don’t think that movie looks very good, but if that scene makes the final cut, well…I may just be buying a ticket.

  13. As long as Congress is around, CPAs will have work.

    1. Unfortunately true.

  14. A Barbie doll tricked out with a video camera concealed in her necklace could be used by predators to create child pornography.
    True dat. And if Eleanor Roosevelt could fly, she wouldn’t bump her ass a hoppin’.

    1. That sort of Barbie could also be used to create Eleanor Roosevelt pornography. I wonder if there is any meat left, or if you’d have to settle for a bony frottage. Or a raspy penetration of the foramen magnum with a little phalanges anal bead action.

      1. I pray for blindness.

      2. I’m up for some Eleanor porn!

        1. Finally!

    2. It could also be used as a nannycam to make sure the babysitter isn’t molesting your child.

      But yeah, it’s probably WAY more likely that every sicko in the country will get one to further their child-fucking careers.

  15. What about pedobear?

    1. His eyes are already cameras.

      1. With backscatter technology.

  16. From the Google News headlines:

    Obama to Push Unemployment Benefits as Condition of Extending Tax Rates

    “If you guys let me spend more money, we can put it on the credit card.”

    That there is some mighty fine bipartisanship. My ass hurts.

    1. Do you get taxed on unemployment benefits?

      1. Yes, UI income is taxable income.

      2. Isn’t that kind of like giving someone a twenty and then asking for two dollars of it back, because…well, just because?

        1. No. It’s more like giving someone a twenty and asking for seven dollars back.

    2. Also, they’re basically saying, hey, the status quo is working so well for us, let’s not change a thing.

  17. As I have said before, I am deeply ambivalent about extended unemployment benefits. I think there are real negative effects on job-seeking behavior, but I would rather see “stimulative” money put directly in the hands of individuals instead of letting it be used for political gain by federal, state and local elected officials shitbags.

    1. Put the stimulus money in my hands. I promise that I will get a high multiplier effect and provide many more jobs than the current stimulus.

      As an added bonus, Reason staff and blog visitors will be drafted to help with the booze and strippers. Just spreadin’ the wealth around, yo!

  18. The FBI has it wrong. Rumor is that Ken has been date raping Barbie. But no one believes her because they think Ken is gay. Now she will get the proof she needs. So far all she has is video of Evil Knievel and G.I. Joe behind the toy box. Barbie isn’t talking about the content, but I hear it will soon be released on Wikileaks.

  19. “multiple scleoris”?

  20. Interesting article on “stem cell” research and MS. They are using retinoic acid (a vitamin A derivative). My lab actually did work on retinoic acid and MS about 20 years ago at Alabama-Birmingham. We found cancer fighting immune boosting effects, but one of the real targets was to wipe the memory effect in immune cells to fight auto-immune diseases. The prime motivator for that was one of the grad students who was diagnosed with MS while at the lab.

    We thought we’d have a major boost for cancer treatment fairly soon coming from our work, but the PI died (ironically from lung cancer) and his projects dissolved. The work was picked up elsewhere, but not with the same focus. The big thing I learned was that exciting preliminary results are usually misleading.

  21. “multiple scleoris”?

    What happens when you allow your scleorus to have a litter of pups.

  22. So, state and muni bond collapse or not? Next crisis or next bailout?

  23. Unibomber, how about Unibrow Month from our friends at Feministing!?!


    1. While [Movember] is a great way for men and people who can grow moustaches to get involved in raising money for an important cause, it has heretofore been lacking in opportunities for women who have trouble growing moustaches to get involved

      All that breast cancer stuff isn’t enough for them, apparently. They need to be a part of EVERYTHING. They can’t even GET prostate cancer!

      1. These are people whose parents paid too much attention to them as a child. They need to have the spotlight on them all of the time.

  24. exas rule the death penalt

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