Notes from Polls All Over

True Tea Party winner: Republican Mike Lee's win over Sam Granato in the Utah Senate race can't be explained away as a blind anti-Obama wave. Lee defeated Republican incumbent Bob Bennett in the primary. Bennett, the TARP-supporting, health-care co-writing RINO who held the seat for three terms, is the textbook case of the kind of lukewarm Republican the Tea Party was said to be undoing. Good for Lee in seeing it through.

Sisters aren't doin' it for themselves, but one sister is doin' it for her own self: Nikki Haley endures a season of hot-wife innuendo to become governor of South Carolina.

Interesting candidates fail; essential uninterestingness of politics preserved:

• Krystall Ball sucks the red dildo in Virginia's first district House race. Republican Rob Wittman comes through for all homeowners affected by Chinese drywall.
• She's you, which means you're a loser: Christine O'Donnell exorcised by Chris Coons in Delaware Senate race.
• Anti-homosexualist Carl Paladino gets cornholed by Andrew Cuomo in race for governor of New York.

Rick Santorum, former Pennsylvania Republican senator and namesake of erotic discharge, on GOP's gaining control of state legislatures and executive offices:

They're going to be able to redistrict these into permanent majorities in some case.

Dogshit race still not scooped up: Sestak-Toomey still in dead heat.

Is it a tsunamiquake? I say no. Dems lose House, hold Senate and some major governorships. And California hasn't even closed yet.

Sarah Palin and Gerry Ferraro together, for first time ever on Fox News: More intelligent than I was expecting from these dingbats.

Comments

[Fist of Etiquette]

How did the terrorists do today? Did they win?

[John]

Yes. They always win. Just by asking that, you have casued the to win again. Way to go Fist. Why do you hate America so much?

[Fist of Etiquette]

You asking why I hate America caused the terrorists to take one on the chin. Stalemate has been restored.

[Kevin]

"Sarah Palin and Gerry Ferraro together"

These are the times that I am thankful for the mute button on my remote.

[Wind Rider]

Don't make us whip out rule 34 on ya, pal.

[Ken Shultz]

"Is it a tsunamiquake? I say no. Dems get House, hold Senate and some major governorships."

Yeah, I think he meant "Republicans get House", but in his defense, there wasn't as much difference between the Bush Era Republicans in the House and the Pelosi Democrats as a lotta people think.

[West Coaster]

Tim,

Don't you mean Reps get House...?

[jester]

Dems get Hosed.

[Mr. FIFY]

Wow... poor New York. Either way, they were gonna get fucked.

[Law Student]

Did anyone else see Bill Bennet (I don't care how that cocksucker's name is spelled) on CNN talking about families affected by "marijuana addiction?" What an ass.

[John]

Did he talk about gambling addiction? He is the worst. Mr. Book of Values is a degenerate gambler. I hate that guy.

[SIV]

I have a low opinion of dopers, despite my taste for dope, but degenerate gamblers are the worst.

[Ken Shultz]

Yeah, I don't know whether Bennett is calling for the re-criminalization of marijuana, but just 'cause I think the stuff should be legal doesn't mean I lose the right to the criticize stoners for being...um...stoners.

P.S. I think alcoholism sucks too.

[Saget]

Marijuana addiction? Have you ever sucked a cock for your next hit, like I have for just another chance at the roulette table? I didn't think so.

[C'mon man]

Looks like a big winner for Cali. No dope, and Boxer and Brown win. Good for you guys. What a model state. I can't wait to come out and ride that sweet ass rail.

[John]

California gives a straight flush of stupid. Aren't they supposed to be communists but at least liberal on drugs? I guess they officially suck at everything now.

[jester]

yep. the 'ultimate hand' job.

[SIV]

California used to be such a cool place from 1849-1981 or so.

[Invisible Finger]

Then a large influx of Northeast Liberals and their gardeners came.

[BenDU99]

Prop 19 going down is incredibly depressing, but I'll just have to laugh at Cali. You couldn't do a better job of running your state into the ground if you tried. I guess the rest of us better pray Congress doesn't bail out Cali before their eventual armageddon.

[New York]

"You couldn't do a better job of running your state into the ground if you tried. "

You could be more like us.

[I am not the government's ATM]

Well if Arnies cap and trade isn't reversed via prop 23 the end may be quicker than expected. We've been riding a slow train to fiscal death but this will get us on the high speed rail to hell.

[John]

I don't usually watch cable news. My God Megan Kelly is good looking. Jesus she is unbelievable.

[SIV]

I'd trade a testicle to fuck Dana Perino.

[Bingo]

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/03......html?_r=1

Hope for nerds everywhere...

[John]

It is not uncommon for smoking hot women to marry dorky guys. Smoking hot women can be princesses. They don't want to be married to someone who might draw attention away from them.

[zoltan]

Most women want to be married to a rich guy, ugly or not.

[syd]

"A retractable dog leash helped seal their fate. On New Year's Eve, Mr. Brunt and Ms. Kelly were in Washington walking her two Shih Tzus when Mr. Brunt lost control of the leash tethered to Bailey. The dog narrowly missed being hit by a car.

"I apologized," Mr. Brunt recalled. But Ms. Kelly couldn't let it go and accused him of trying to kill the dog."

That's a reasonable response...

[Dave]

I read that whole fluff piece from start to end. Fuck you.

[Dave]

I read that whole fluff piece from start to end. Fuck you.

[Jonas]

It needed to be said twice.

[Law Student]

They asked him about Prop. 19 and he went on a whole rant about how marijuana ruins families is a "very dangerous drug." He said the addiction thing and then stuttered halfway through the word perhaps realizing that everyone knows that is an outright lie.

[Law Student]

supposed to be a reply to John

[Law Student]

Also one of the other pundits made a joke that ballots were running out at Cali colleges because they were "rolling them up and smoking them." I actually laughed out loud at that one before Bennet had me standing screaming liar at the tv.

[John]

The faux thoughtfulness and smugness makes me want to throw the TV out the window. And then privately, he was gambling his kids college funds while he was lecturing the rest of the country on values. I can't believe he still gets on TV.

[Law Student]

Its the CNN thing. Spitzer used the word "hypocrisy" many times tonight. Still I can't stomach FNC or MSNBC so it is what I'm stuck with.

[John]

I tried to watch MSNBC for the schadenfreude. I got thirty seconds of Olberman and Huffington discussing how economies work and the stupid was overwelming. I had to change the channel

[Law Student]

I watch CNN because most of the time it is Cooper or Blitzer talking which is fine. The "best political team on television" are a bunch of partisan hacks though. Also it is amusing watching Blitzer talking about the tweet results.

[John]

I like Brit Hume a lot on Fox. But Fox has Karl Rove who makes my flesh crawl. But at least you get to look at Megan Kelly

[peachy]

Yeah, I couldn't manage MSNBC. CNN & the local NBC channel were adequate, but mostly it's been H&R and the maps at nytimes.com.

[Joe M]

Tim, you linked to Jezebel. Hit & Run just nuked the fridge.

[Row vs Wade]

I was just about to post about this. Please, Reason, you are a respectable journalism publication. Don't sully your good name by linking to the crap that is the Gawker network.

[C'mon man]

This is why we have elections, Barry. It's a good thing the R's don't get a majority in the Senate. This is more of a bitch slap to the Hope and Change. Surely Republicans understand there wasn't exactly Republican enthusiasm. If only Obama could of gone on television some and articulated his message better.

[I am not the government's ATM]

If only Obama could of gone on television some and articulated his message better.

Your asking a lot of the teleprompter. It has tipped over on its own processing that b.s.

[C'mon man]

That Telepromter is an articulatin' mofo, fo' sho.

[Jon Stewert]

If only Obama could of gone on television some and articulated his message better.

I was doing my best... I mean, it's just a little comedy show!

[hmm]

So can we sell off California yet? The present sale value has out striped future cash flows and headache costs.

[Ebeneezer Scrooge]

Can't we just abandon it?

And if all that fails, how much would we have to pay Mexico to take it back? I bet it would still be a bargain for the US taxpayer.

[Joe M]

I'm pretty sure we're underwater on California at this point.

[Tulpa]

Toomey is starting to pull away from Sestak in PA senate race. 52-48 with 98% reporting.

[Mr ChartreuseI]

I think CNN just called PA Senate for Toomey

[David Rollins]

I don't care who won in NY. The rent is too damn high.

[Mr Chartreuse]

Then comes in another call from CNN for Kirk in IL

[Mr Chartreuse]

Called for Reid in NV. Tea party women in Senate races not so good tonight.

[Tulpa]

Taking back the Senate was going to be a long shot regardless. Picking up 6 seats (so far) is pretty significant, especially since this is the 2004 Senate class (when Republicans won big) which has fewer Dem incumbents to unseat.

In 2012, all the Dems who won Senate seats in red states in '06 are going to come back up for reelection, and that might be a serious bloodbath for the blues.

[Cuddly Soft Balls of Death]

First of all, I want to congratulate my opponent for running a brilliant campaign, and wish him continued success in the future.

To my wonderful staff, all my contributors, volunteers, and the supporters who voted for me, thank you. Thank you. I love you. You're all awesome.

To those who voted against me, I'd just like to reach out to you and give you a chance to get ball cancer and die. Fuck you all.

To my campaign manager, who forbid me to have even a single drink for the last 14 months, fuck you, too. I want everyone to know I have just over two gallons of Jim Beam in the back seat of my car, and will not be doing a single goddam thing until every last drop of it is gone.

Thank you, and good night. God bless America. Except for Democrats.

[My asshole neighbors]

Control, revenge, and envy win. Liberty loses.