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Nanny State

Anarchists Back Lemonade Stand Girl, Get Into the Illicit Lemonade Biz

Katherine Mangu-Ward | 8.9.2010 2:50 PM

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By now, you've probably heard the story of the little girl in Portland who set up a lemonade stand and was promptly accosted by health department officials who threatened her with a $500 fine for operating an "food establishment" without the required $120 temporary restaurant license. The girl wound up crying her eyes out, becoming a talk radio sensation, and eventually eliciting an apology.

But it's not over yet. The girl happened to have been lucky enough to set up shop next to a bunch of anarchists at the now-notorious Portland street fair. After advising her to change her sign so that she was asking only for donations—thus potentially dodging the health department fizz, the anarchists tried to rally the crowd to her cause. 

Now they're going a step further, with a plan to stage an event on the last Thursday of the month. They've set up a Facebook group to celebrate and promote their "Lemonade Revolt":

We are proposing a lemonade bloc next last thursday. Get together with your friends and family and come up with a creative lemonade. Rosemary, lavender, mint, honey, agave, mate, carob, what the fuck ever you can come up with, show up early on alberta and 25th to 26th streets around 11 or 12 in the daytime, set up a table and offer lemonade for donation, or free. We should fill the entire bloc with lemonade stands! The state will come, but we will NOT leave. We will fill the streets with dance and revelry in the spirit of last thursday's origins, an autonomous, anarchistic freak show that reclaims the streets, the neighborhoods and our lives.

Those who are thirsty for justice—or lavender lemonade—should drop by.

Reason on other child entrepreneur crackdowns here, here, and here.

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NEXT: Patricia Neal, RIP

Katherine Mangu-Ward is editor in chief of Reason.

Nanny StateFood Freedom
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  1. ?   15 years ago

    They've set up a Facebook group

    Of course they have.

    1. Mustaf Herod Apyur Poupr...   15 years ago

      The Anarchist Cook..er...Facebook

  2. Night Elf Mohawk   15 years ago

    Everyone acts like the kid is the victim in all of this? Kool Aid lemonade? Really? She deserves more than a fine.

    1. Old Mexican   15 years ago

      She deserves a beating, just like any other mere mortal who dares exercise his or her freedom.

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v.....r_embedded

      1. Night Elf Mohawk   15 years ago

        Nah, I'd save the beatings for the kids who use store brand powdered drink mix and try to pass it off as "lemonade."

  3. Law Student   15 years ago

    "set up a table and offer lemonade for donation, or free."

    Wouldn't charging for it be a better protest? Do these anarchist have no balls or do they think profit is evil or something?

    1. Irresponsible Hater   15 years ago

      No balls, no sense. These must be starbucks-window-smashing "anarchists", not real anarchists...

      1. Episiarch   15 years ago

        That's my first question whenever some journo-idiot uses the term "anarchist". What kind of "anarchist"? Lysander Spooner indivdualist? Anarcho-capitalist? Or "Marxist douchebag but anarchist sounds way cooler"?

        1. SIV   15 years ago

          "Marxist douchebag but anarchist sounds way cooler"?

          That's the only kind of anarchist you ever hear about.
          Individualist anarchists are generally referred to as "hate groups".

          1. Hazel Meade   15 years ago

            Just shows who the establishment fears more.

        2. Lowdog   15 years ago

          Dunno about these blokes, but in the Tempe, AZ area, the 'anarchists' are definitely in the Marxist camp.

          1. mad libertarian guy   15 years ago

            I've always thought that funny. Anarchy implies no government, yet Marxist implies a whole fuckin' heaping of government.

            1. Sarah Palin   15 years ago

              "Anarchists" want "voluntary" non-statist socialism.

              1. omg   15 years ago

                Coming from an actual anarchist, I've been rather disturbed by how willing these "anarchists" are to use the state to achieve their ends. I guess they think the state will just go away once their stated aims are achieved (the breaking down of the class system, forced equalization of outcomes, etc etc). I'm not sure anyone has ever called them on this.

                1. ebrown2   15 years ago

                  "Coming from an actual anarchist, I've been rather disturbed by how willing these "anarchists" are to use the state to achieve their ends."

                  My friend Bill calls them "I-Pod anarchists." You know, the welfare-state loving kind who advocate "freedom for me but not for thee." Jello Biafra is the classic example.

                  Talk about a guy who REALLY needs a Holiday in Cambodia!

          2. AA   15 years ago

            True. But hey, did you see Nick Coons is running for congress in the 5th District as an anarcho-capitalist in the Libertarian party? He wont win, but I'm just pointing it out.

        3. ClubMedSux   15 years ago

          My thoughts too. Maybe they're the anarchists who were protesting a reduction in government benefits a few months ago.

          1. ?   15 years ago

            "Anarchy" means never having to define your terms.

            1. wylie   15 years ago

              Wouldn't that be Anetomy or something? Anetomyly?

              1. ?   15 years ago

                Wouldn't that be Anetomy or something? Anetomyly?

                Irrelevant. Those are just words. Genuine anarchy will free our minds from these literary shackles. Ig dovr prxgts. Shlppt!

                1. wylie   15 years ago

                  Rpiy jhsat alo hridnylse?

                  (C'mon, spamfilter!)

        4. Mo   15 years ago

          We're an anarcho-syndicalist commune. We take it in turns to act as a sort of executive officer for the week. But all the decision of that officer have to be ratified at a special biweekly meeting. By a simple majority in the case of purely internal affairs, but by a two-thirds majority in the case of more...

          1. King Arthur   15 years ago

            You're a loony.

            1. Almanian   15 years ago

              Did you hear that? What a giveaway that was...

          2. Cunctator   15 years ago

            Organized anarchists, how cool.

          3. ?   15 years ago

            Has Wikileaks leaked a memo from Whale Wars?

        5. QuantumTuba   15 years ago

          I'm friends with a lot of an-caps/individualists/agorists on FB, and many are attending this. Checking the radio show of the founder has shown definite agorist tendencies but no Marxist tendencies so far.

    2. mark   15 years ago

      I suggest liberty-loving Portland-ites set up a stand offering "Lemonade for profit" and see how the anarchists like it, and whether they stand up for your right to sell lemonade and keep the profits hidden from the IRS.

      Also nice would be some innovation: Quality lemonade with cane sugar, nice cups, maybe hiring a guitarist with an amp.

      1. Hazel Meade   15 years ago

        Keep up the protest for a week or more, and see which lemonade states hold out the longest.

        My guess is the ones turning a profit.

  4. Caleb   15 years ago

    The health department must have really needed $500 dollars that day.

    I mean, really, the balls of that guy to threaten a little girl.

    1. Caleb   15 years ago

      and yes, I realize I typed "$500 dollars."

    2. Enough About Palin   15 years ago

      My city (Minneapolis) just sent a letter saying that if there is refuse strewn around by your garbage can on pick-up day, they will pick it up and charge you at least $150.00 for their trouble. No warning, just a fine. They say that even if you didn't do it, it's your cart and your responsibility so make certain to keep an eye on it, especially on garbage pick-up day.

      WHERE THE FUCK IS MY DUE PROCESS???

      1. The Wind   15 years ago

        Boy, people are going to hate me.

        1. A Racoon   15 years ago

          They will hate me more.

          1. skr   15 years ago

            Oh sure but if we try to fucking shoot you....

      2. Pro Libertate   15 years ago

        Man, the government is worse than the mob.

        1. Old Mexican   15 years ago

          Re: Pro Libertate,

          Man, the government is worse than the mob.

          You think?

          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v.....r_embedded

      3. Slut Bunwalla   15 years ago

        And of course their garbage collectors won't, you know, accidentally drop some trash around a few yards and then report the mess.

        1. Laird   15 years ago

          Don't try to video them in the act, though, or you'll be prosecuted for violating their "privacy rights".

          http://reason.com/archives/201.....-check-the

      4. Arsonist   15 years ago

        Don't worry. I'll make sure there is nothing left to pick up.

    3. Paul   15 years ago

      Good god man, don't you know there's a revenue crunch on?!!

      1. Enough About Palin   15 years ago

        These are the same motherfuckers who stole a Pallet loaded with fencing materials because it was within 20 feet of the alley on collection day. But they won't empty your garbage can if it's more than 3 feet from the alley.

        1. wylie   15 years ago

          You missed the new reg that bans fences. Makes it tougher for the collection men to come in your house and haul off your shit once fining you isn't enough to keep the municipality out of the red.

  5. sage   15 years ago

    the anarchists tried to rally the crowd to her cause.

    Now they're going a step further, with a plan to stage an event on the last Thursday of the month. look for people on the street with open cuts and squirt lemon juice on them.

    NOW you've got a story.

  6. R C Dean   15 years ago

    "lemonade bloc . . . offer lemonade for donation, or free . . . fill the streets with dance and revelry"

    Good Lord. I may never drink lemonade again.

    1. Almanian   15 years ago

      Sounds like a Renaissance Festival more than good ole anarchy...

  7. Tulpa   15 years ago

    Sorry, this girl should not be allowed to set up her lemonade stand until she discloses all her funding sources and denounces all violence associated with lemons and lemon consumers.

    1. Tulpa   15 years ago

      From Wikipedia's article on lemons:

      The lemon was first recorded in literature in a tenth century Arabic treatise on farming, and was also used as an ornamental plant in early Islamic gardens.

      Hmmmmmmmmmmm.....

      1. Almanian   15 years ago

        ...you know who else liked lemonade...

      2. kansan   15 years ago

        Go beat your wife.

    2. Paul   15 years ago

      Was it Fair Trade lemonade? What about the Lemon workers? What of them?

      1. mark   15 years ago

        I hear it was Kool-Aid. What about the beet sugar workers?

      2. John Tagliaferro   15 years ago

        If she had only forged some union labels this would not be an issue.

    3. Enough About Palin   15 years ago

      Go fuck yourself, asscunt.

  8. ?   15 years ago

    "Creative lemonade. Rosemary, lavender, mint...what the fuck ever you can come up with...The state will come, but we will NOT leave...An autonomous, anarchistic freak show that reclaims the streets..."

    Groovy. Eat your heart out, Tom Jefferson. This here is a Declaration of Lemonade! Will there be a kiosk selling "Che" Guevara T-shirts?

  9. Edwin   15 years ago

    if these kids were smart they'd switch from lemonade to coffee nowadays

  10. Paul   15 years ago

    My only advice: be careful who latches on to your cause.

  11. PR   15 years ago

    Thank science that when cities run short of money they cut back on discretionary items like police, fire, and teachers instead of lemonade stand health inspectors.

    1. Tulpa   15 years ago

      Have you ever had a person die in your arms because of dysentery from a rancid lemonade stand?

      1. Coeus   15 years ago

        Once, but he was a dick.

    2. mad libertarian guy   15 years ago

      But the Times had me convinced that cities have no choice now.

  12. anarchist   15 years ago

    Because you told me to open a protest lemonade stand, I refuse to open one

  13. Old Mexican   15 years ago

    We are proposing a lemonade bloc next last thursday. Get together with your friends and family and come up with a creative lemonade. Rosemary, lavender, mint, honey, agave, mate, carob, what the fuck ever you can come up with, show up early on alberta and 25th to 26th streets around 11 or 12 in the daytime, set up a table and offer lemonade for donation, or free. We should fill the entire bloc with lemonade stands! The state will come, but we will NOT leave.

    I don't care if these are faux (i.e. non-anarchocapitalist) anarchists, the above sounds like a great idea, very Gandhi-like. I love it.

  14. omg   15 years ago

    I love the "safety" argument from the regulatory goon camp.

    And lo, the $150 fee magicks all germs from the stand. In fact, there has never been a documented case of anyone getting sick from a stand or restaurant who has paid the $150 extortion totally optional voluntary safety stipend to keep children safe.

    1. cynical   15 years ago

      It's an indulgence.

    2. Bill Dalasio   15 years ago

      Actually, is it even possible to get sick from Kool-Aid (other than having too much)?

  15. Caleb   15 years ago

    Okay, so the health department officials were just doing their job.

    But instead of giving the girl (and presumably, her parents) a hard time for not going through all the bureaucratic red-tape and threatening her with a $500 fine, could the health department just taken 5-10 minutes to investigate the lemonade manufacturing to see if the girl (I bet it was the mother mixing the lemonade) the correct sanitary precautions?

    1. John Tagliaferro   15 years ago

      Those precautions are impossible to comply with without a license and some bribery.

    2. Hazel Meade   15 years ago

      Why not just wait and see if anyone gets sick, and then sue her.
      No harm, no foul.

  16. John Tagliaferro   15 years ago

    Sounds like an Andy Griffith episode, B&W era. The grumpy store owner wants the guy selling hardware by the side of the road shut down by Sheriff Taylor.

    1. Jeffersonian   15 years ago

      I think that's the episode where Mayberry gets its own branch of the Ministry of Fear.

    2. Robert   15 years ago

      Don Knotts would be more than happy to oblige.

      1. ebrown2   15 years ago

        Sadly, Griffith would IRL, as his shilling for O-Care demonstrates.

  17. MOST INTERESTING MAN IN WORLD   15 years ago

    I don't always drink lemonade, but when I do, I prefer hard lemonade. Stay free, my friends.

  18. P Brooks   15 years ago

    Just bring a pitcher and some lemons. You can get all the water you need from the fire hoses.

  19. Citizen Norhing   15 years ago

    Sounds like a great idea. Why all the naysaying?

  20. rabble   15 years ago

    It was I who started the facebook group as a piece of absurdity. It is a spectacle. The real issue at hand is thresh hold. How far will you be pushed before you fight back?
    As far as the naysaying, I do not care what bullshit ideas you may have of me. At least I am having fun fighting back.

  21. Hazel Meade   15 years ago

    Ironically, most of these anarchists probably hate and fear "teabaggers" as a gang of racist morons.

    if they were actually open minded and "liberal" in any meaningful way, they mgiht talk to a few of them and discover some common ground.

  22. Organic Girl   15 years ago

    I support this protest, but only as long as the lemons are fair-trade organic, sweetened only with cane sugar, and the lemonade stands are organized as a unionized non-profit cooperative.

    The prices should be fixed at 25 cents per glass so that there is no dog-eat-dog competition allowed, and so that everyone will be able to afford the lemonade.

    This may require the co-op to subsidize the lemonade stands, so everyone will have to pay a $120 fee to the collective to pay for the costs of buying the lemons. All the lemons will be shared equally amoung all the stands, regardless of lemonade quality.

  23. Robert   15 years ago

    Tea, lemonade...what will be the next protest beverage?

  24. Nelson   15 years ago

    And don't forget....

    http://www.weebls-stuff.com/songs/Lemons/

  25. Nike Air Jordan   10 years ago

    Fear not that the life shall come to an end, but rather fear that it shall never have a beginning. -- J.H. Newman

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