Nanny State

Ice Cream Trucks Make Triumphant Return to Niskayuna, NY, After 34-Year Hiatus


I love the little ice cream skull

After the 1975 death of a girl who was running to catch an ice cream truck in nearby Rotterdam, the dairy jinglers were banned from the streets of the town of Niskayuna, New York. This week, the town board voted 3-2 to let them back in for a month of probation.

Voting against lifting the ban, primarily for safety reasons, were board members Liz Orzel Kasper and Jonathan McKinney.

Before the meeting, McKinney argued that nothing has changed in 34 years to convince him that reversing the ban was a good thing. "I think it's more dangerous now because of cellphones and texting," said McKinney, adding that he was fielding more calls from Niskayuna residents expressing anxieties over safety and quality of life issues.

Ice cream vendor Brian Collis, president of Mr. Ding-a-Ling, noted his company's safety record which he said dates back to 1987 without an accident. He also stressed that his drivers receive safety training and background checks. Outside of town hall he offered free ice cream to youngsters….

Resident Craig Taulsen seemed to be the voice of reason.

"Can we use a little common sense here?" he asked. "It's an ice cream truck … it's not the end of the world."

I wrote about ice cream truck bans here.

Via Free Range Kids.

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  1. This is what happens when you’re raised in a swamp with a bear as your best friend.

    Parents be forewarned!

  2. No one tell MeME or whoever that dumb blond who debated Mangu Ward on Fox the other day was.

    1. I think they should descend on MeMe’s house like a ravenous and rabid hoard of hellhounds smelling fresh meat. She’ll snap and stuff herself with a dozen creamsicles within minutes.

      And I’ll sell tickets to it.

    2. The best MeMe moment was The Jacket handing her her ass on Stossel. It almost looked like the calm, kool, collected Jacket was going to snap her neck.

  3. If the ice cream truck bans saves just one life……

    1. We need sensible legislation to control ice cream truck violence.

      1. if they would allow for concealed carry of ice cream cones, all these problems would go a way.

      2. Nonsense, we need a single provider of mobile frozen dairy confections to assure proper and safe distribution of same. Chuck Schumer strikes me as the perfect legislator to assemble such a scheme.

  4. Today it’s an ice cream truck.

    Tomorrow it’s a crack wagon!!!

    1. Day after tomorrow:
      “In suburban neighborhood, middle aged man run over and killed while running to meet the prostitution truck”.

      1. All of a sudden the future seems so promising.

        1. “I’ll have a CrackWhore…aaaand one chocolate Hand Job Mary…and what did you want sweetie?…oh yeah and 2 Chuck Schumers.”

          1. “2 Chuck Shumers!?! What kind of whore truck do you think I’m runnin’?! Now get the fuck outta here!”

            1. “The nutty bitch titties are the best! I bite them off first.”

      2. Always look both ways before running up to the prostituion wagon, and pop a viagra.

      3. Day after tomorrow:
        “In suburban neighborhood, middle aged man run over and killed while running to meet the prostitution truck”.

        Subhead:”Kathleen Parker looking for new co-host.”

  5. I’ve got an idea. If your kid is too young to know they shouldn’t run in the street, they should be supervised. I guarantee from experience that a swat on the ass reinforceds the “don’t run in the street” message and can be taught effectively as young as four.

    1. Agreed. Kicking a kid’s ass can save said ass.

    2. Good point. Ice cream trucks could lead to an increase in child abuse. These things really are dangerous.

    3. “If your kid is too young to know they shouldn’t run in the street, they should be supervised.”

      You have any idea how much it would cost to hire someone to supervise each child?

      It’s way easier to just ban the ice cream trucks.

      1. I thought liberals supported Darwinian evolution.

  6. How many of those cheesy movies has Clint Howard been in, anyhow?

    1. He was big in the 60s and 70s as a cute kid. Starred in Gentle Ben, appeared in a classic Star Trek episode.

      1. Yeah, I remember that Trek episode well. He offered them a drink called “tranya” (sp?)

        But as he grew older, he also was in a bunch of B-grade flicks.

        Wasn’t he in Phantasm, or am I remembering incorrectly?

        1. He’s in most of his brother’s movies. Some of which are good.

        2. Yeah, I remember that Trek episode well. He offered them a drink called “tranya”

          I still hear that dubbed laugh in my nightmares.

          1. Balok! BALOK!!!

            1. This is the face of the evil that comes to you in your sleep.


              1. Your image is blocked. What is it you do for a living again? Don’t you sell vacuums door to door or something?

                1. Are you still trying to pass yourself off as a Penthouse Forum writer?

                    1. If you were trying to do a meta-joke, you succeeded, because your image is blocked too. HA HA HA HA

                      Here you go, morons.

                  1. “Dear Penthouse Forum, I live in Hollywood where I am one of the many out of work actors trying for his big break. Work is hard to come by out here. Without a good job, pussy is too…”

        3. WTF-

          Phantasm is my favorite movie. The ice cream man in that movie was called Reggie. The role was played by Reggie Bannister.

      2. “He was big in the 60s and 70s as a cute kid.”

        He was a weird lookin’ little kid.

    2. All of them.

  7. Ice cream man? I thought joe was a community planner.

  8. “It’s an ice cream truck … it’s not the end of the world.”

    That’s what they all say. Until it’s too late….

    1. We die.

  9. I would be extremely interested to know how many people have been killed by firetrucks since 1975; I suspect it is a number greater than zero. and yet, people are daily exposed to the horrendous risk of man-eating firetrucks roaming the bucolic lanes of Niskayuna, New York. What a tragedy.

    1. And Police cars.

      1. and Kennedy’s

        1. Ambulances and bookmobiles.

    2. I actually knew a volunteer firefighter who ran over a homeless guy dressed as Santa Claus because St. Nick stepped in front of the truck as it was speeding to a fire. The firefighter was really broken up about it.

      1. Not as broken up as the guy he ran over, I bet. <ducks>

  10. If the probation expires, maybe the trucks can start selling Korean BBQ (more here).

  11. Its the bell ringing thats dangerous.

    To the guy driving the truck.

    Actually where I live they this godawfull fake kaliope music

    1. There’s one the rolls through our neighborhood playing cheezy digital electronic music, with random animal noises and other wierd sound effect thrown in – it’s a wierd mix of “dinkly dinkly do do do” with dog barks and “boi-oi-oinngg!” sound effects.

      You can hear it coming several blocks away. It can get annoying.

      And the ice cream is cheap crap, but expensive.

      1. I’ve heard that one once (though not in my ward, which stupidly bans ice cream trucks). It’s kinda freaky.

    2. They are EVERYWHERE in the Phoenix area (and they need to be given it’s Elebenty-Billion degress outside). One which stalked the neighborhood I lived in had kaliope versions of Metallica songs.

  12. Mr. Ding-a-Ling may not be the best name for a company that lures kids to middle-age men in vans.

    1. They’re everywhere here. I live 15 minutes from Niskayuna. It’s probably the only town that doesn’t have a Mr. Ding-a-Ling and his shitty ice cream. Why don’t ice cream trucks serve cones and dishes of real ice cream? Why just ice cream sandwiches, creamsicles, and shit?

      1. Probably for the same reason LA street vendors can’t serve bacon dogs.

  13. Remember when you were a kid, and the ice cream truck came by, and you were overjoyed because it was so awesome? If you want to take that feeling away from kids, you’re a fucking asshole.

    That said, I hate all nice sweet things, especially children.

    1. So stipulated.

      1. Warty, even Willy Wonka?

  14. Does being “President of Mr. Ding-a-Ling” mean you’re no longer “Master of your Domain”?

  15. I think someone should come up with a Sushi Truck, which drives around affluent neighborhoods and commercial districts selling sushi.

    1. Perfect! And instead of “Pop Goes the Weasel” from some ancient battered speakers, it can play Philip Glass from a Bose stereo.

      Actually, the sad thing is that there’s already something like this around the corner from my office…freakin’ $9 for six dumplings…

    2. You’d probably want a deep dish pizza truck too, you sick fuck.

      1. Nobody wants deep dish, you heretic.

    3. I don’t know about that. Think about how much insurance you would have to carry. What if a trial lawyer fell while running out to your truck?

      1. Finish the job.

        1. What’s funny is that my Torts professor said that exact same thing (in regards to running over anyone, not just lawyers), as wrongful death is cheaper than negligence. Of course, the fact that you’re converting manslaughter to murder is a flaw with that concept, but what do you expect from an academic?

      2. Trial lawyers eat puppies, kittens, and deep dish, not sushi.

      3. If you kill him, he can’t sue.

        1. The family can.

        2. don’t kill them, an ice pick through an eye socket up into the frontal lobe… makes them much nicer

    4. Sushi should never be offered as buffet or delivery, and certainly never consumed as such.

      1. It wouldn’t be delivery. It would be freshly prepared by the sushi chef/driver.

        I certainly don’t think a complexly rich and tasty deep-dish pizza could be prepared and served from a small truck. Flavored cardboard, on the other hand, could be.

        1. So you’re saying it is possible, then.

          1. To serve the antimatter that is thin-shit pizza? Of course! A child with an Easy-Bake Oven and a tricycle could do that.

    5. I’ll settle for a taco truck playing the song Selma Hayek dances to in From Dusk til Dawn.

  16. You know who else liked ice cream trucks? Hitler!

    1. And he didn’t like deep dish pizza. Yeah, I’m looking at you, Epi…

      1. Episiarch is fully aware of Hitler’s antithesis to deep-dish pizza, being as familiar with Mein Kampf as he is. There’s a whole sub-chapter on Pizzaraum, Hitler’s proposal to acquire the appropriate territories to allow him to make good pizza for the Volk. He blamed the Jews for thin-crust, but that was just his antisemitism coming to the forefront

        1. this is why I read Reason comments – erudation!!! no where else on earth is there such learnedness.

          1. The best statement about Hit & Run regulars I’ve ever seen is that most of us are like Calvin’s dad. Deep truth in that comment.

            1. Ha.

              My favorite C&H strip with Calvin’s dad explaining something.

              It’s very much like explanations I have given to my daughters over the years. Fortunately for me, they now have pretty well-developed bullshit detectors. Which of course is why I did that to them. And of course, because it’s just plain fun.

              1. Absolute classic. And a perfect illustration of the collective humor of this blog.

                1. I used to tell my kids things that were blatantly false and then make them explain to me why I was wrong.

              2. I always get yelled at when I try a Calvin’s dad.

                Mothers are devoid of humor.

        2. Volkspizza! Volkspizza!

          1. Mmmm, racially pure pizza. With Nordic sauce!

  17. With all that ice cream, soon the youngsters will be to fat too run after the ice cream truck, by which time Michelle Obama will have a federal ban in place anyway.

    In other words, it’s a moot point.

    1. You should be whipped.

      1. For getting “to” and “too” so horribly mangled? I agree.

        1. No, for spelling mute wrong.

    2. There’s no whey that’ll happen

  18. Actually where I live they this godawfull fake kaliope music

    The truck which would occasionally troll my little neighborhood in Indianapolis played a (short) loop of some hideous electro-calliope jingle. By the time it reached my house, I was prepared to confess to killing President Lincoln, just to make it stop. I wonder how many ice cream truck drivers commit suicide.

    1. They probably are like Otto from The Simpsons and just get baked and listen to Jimi Hendrix all shift. It would work, and honestly, it’s the only way I can see getting through that job sane.

      1. Hendrix cures mental illness.

        1. “Heeeee-eeeey Joe”

          Oh, sorry, you just queued up a Hendrix moment for me.

  19. I may have mentioned it before, but the ice cream truck that serves my neighborhood has a driver who looks to be Middle Eastern. Syrian, perhaps. Anyway, the music the truck broadcasts is sort of a mix of everything and I suspect he is unfamiliar with the songs. So, he’s blasting out Dixie in a predominately black neighborhood. We often hear Deck the Halls and Hark the Herald Angels. I gotta figure he’s Muslim so it’s funny to think he has no idea that the lyrics to the latter song include the line “Glory to the New Born King”. Perhaps he should be killed for his apostasy.

  20. We Union College alums know Nisky well — home of Golden Phoenix, a sub-par and inexplicably popular chinese buffet restaurant. As far as I know it hasn’t murdered any children yet.

  21. The ice cream truck that tortures us while we play disc golf blasts nothing but Christmas music.

    1. You’re already torturing yourself by playing disc golf in the first place, Jack Disclaus.

      1. It’s not ULTIMATE or EXTREME enough for you. It’s not enough of a Mountain Dew commercial for you.

        1. It doesn’t lower sperm count, that’s an urban myth.

    2. That’s how you know what dead hippie smells like.

      1. The KY disc golf experience includes hippies but there are also a lot of heavily-tattooed meth addicts too.

        1. Well, it is Kentucky.

        2. You need lube to play disc golf?

          1. No, but it helps.

  22. Free ice cream to children? You monster.

  23. Once upon a time, ice crean trucks were a thing of beauty.

    Nowadays, not so much.

  24. If a school bus has an accident, will they close down the public schools?

  25. Wow, I think that is truly amazing. Long overdue!


  26. Could David Lee Roth be reached for comment?

  27. One of Clint Howard’s best roles! Really wish that TNT still showed Joe Bob Briggs Monstervision.

  28. Of course, the fact that you’re converting manslaughter to murder is a flaw with that concept, but what do you expect from an academic?

    Yes, but there is a significant advantage in the courtroom of not having any contradictory testimony.

  29. 85 posts and no one’s linked to this? Or did it miss it?

    1. Oh, hurly buehrle mentioned it. Never mind.

    2. We’re busy here trying to forget that stain on our history.

  30. Hitler’s antithesis to deep-dish pizza

    “Antipathy” is the word you seek.

    Go directly to Jail. Do not pass Go, do not collect two hundred dollars.

    1. Yeah, I was saying something else and didn’t fix that. Oh, well, please be sure to edit for my collected works.

      1. You moron. Think of that the next time you try your revisionist Pizzacaust history. Are you banned in Germany?

  31. They should ban ice cream sales to children who are not wearing helmets. I can’t believe no one has thought of this obvious safety measure.

  32. Collis is an amateur and is going about it all wrong.

    He needs to get a regulation passed requiring all ice cream truck operators go through a one-week safety course costing $20,000. With an exception for Ding-a-Ling grandfathered in, of course.

  33. Ding-a-Ling….(snicker)

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