Naomi Campbell: Like Naomi Klein but Dumber

Naomi Campbell, the nasty, brutish, and dumb supermodel famous for lounging on yachts and abusing the help, is being forced to testify in the Hague trial of former Liberian dictator Charles Taylor, after having told prosecutors Oprah Winfrey that she "does not want to be involved in the case." Actress Mia Farrow and Campbell's former agent Carole White will both testify that the model gushed that after meeting Taylor at a dinner thrown by Nelson Mandela (that moral paragon, often spotted hugging dictators and inviting Charles Taylor for dinner) the Liberian strongman, according to the New York Times, gave her a handful of diamonds. This, for reasons too complicated to summarize, is considered important in establishing that Taylor was involved in financing the civil war in Sierra Leone. The Times explains:

Prosecutors see the testimony of the three women as vital, because since the start of the trial Mr. Taylor has steadfastly denied in court that he ever owned or traded in diamonds. The prosecution contends that he used them as currency to finance a rebellion in Sierra Leone in the 1990s, in which tens of thousands of people were killed, raped or mutilated. The charges against Mr. Taylor include murder, conscripting child soldiers, and terrorizing and mutilating civilians.

There is no suggestion that Campbell did anything illegal by accepting the gift from Taylor, so her initial refusal to testify is confusing. It is, though, less confusing when you realize that Campbell, author of The Swan, really loves dictators. After visiting Fidel Castro in Havana, she blubbered that he was "a source of inspiration to the world." According to Campbell, Castro and Mandela—the jailer and the jailed—"have fought with integrity to stick to their beliefs." "I'm so nervous and flustered," she tittered to a reporter, "because I can't believe that I met him." Like, OMG!

GQ magazine, not realizing that Campbell was as thick as a McDonalds milkshake, charged her with interviewing Venezuelan strongman Hugo Chavez, who she called the "rebel angel." A local Caracas newspaper described Campbell as wearing a "revolutionary and exquisite white dress from the prestigious Fendi fashion house."