FTC Discovers Kids Hang at Mall, Like the Internets. Uses Information to Propagandize for Free Trade?

Someone at the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) heard that the kids these days like to hang out at the mall. (Question: Do kids still hang out at the mall? Word on the pedestrian and cyclist-friendly street is that the American mall is dead.) Further, someone—perhaps this same enterprising person?—heard that when the kids are not shopping at DeLiA's, they totally like to watch videos on the World Wide Web.

And so this strange taxpayer-funded, candy-colored interactive online mall of free trade propaganda was born. The lessons are encourage economic literacy, pro-trade attitudes, and mall map reading skills. Click below to watch the lesson about competition.

The lesson is unobjectionable: Three pizza places at the mall? That's good. "When businesses compete, consumers win!" If there's going to be propaganda, this is the topic I'd like to see it on. But sweet baby Jesus, if the FTC keeps it up at this rate, kids will hate capitalism as much as I now hate bureaucratically-approved yellow stoner guy and his federally-funded uptight pink girlfriend.

Comments

[guy in the back row]

They look like teens from the TV show Arthur

[Brian E]

Why is the government taking my money for this?

[Legate Damar]

Malls certainly aren't dead. They're no longer as ubiquitous as they were 20 years ago, but the ones that are in the top half of the survivors are still rolling in it.

[FrBunny]

If you really want the kids on your side, you need to get your message into a comic book.

(Suck it, LoneWacko. Even Superman hates you.)

[Jeff P]

The Mall is where they tell their parents they are going when they they need an alibi for a Rainbow party.

[FIFY. I think.]

when the kids are not shopping at DeLiA's, they totally like to like totally watch videos on the World Wide Web.

Like.

[Rich]

> Why is the government taking my money for this?

Because it can.

At least the interactive game is somewhat less scary than that disaster coloring book.

[DHS Thinks I\'m a Terrorist]

I used to enjoy going to malls because I could get the latest issue of my favorite magazine or short novel then walk to the Starbucks or Barnies and read it while drinking a late. Bookstores are rarely found at malls where I live anymore.

[Pro Libertate]

I live pretty close to a mall. It's not even remotely true that malls are dead, and the place is positively plagued with teenagers on the weekend.

[Danger Will Robinson!]

She: "If we put our money together, we can get..."

[Andrew]

Katherine,

You missed the less straightforward pro-trade propaganda in this whole website...

http://www.ftc.gov/youarehere/site.html#/is-bigger-always-better

That's an alternative food court discussion going on, this time about how the FTC must check out mergers before they are allowed, so that they can decide if the merger will harm consumers or not.

[LarryA]

Now if we can only get Congress and the President to watch it...

[THIS IS THE FTC MONEY SHOT]

http://www.ftc.gov/youarehere/site.html#/mall-history-slideshow-spectacular

[jtuf]

Twenty years ago, my local mall was full of teenagers hanging out. Now it's full of thirty somethings pushing baby carriages. Time marches on. In another fifteen years, it will be full of teenagers again.

[Brandybuck]

Malls are withering for the same reason businesses in general are withering: we're in the middle of a fraking depression! Duh!

There's two malls near me that both started major renovations just before the dot.com crash. One managed to finish its renovation before the credit crash, but the other didn't. Both have only about 1/3 of their space rented. It's very dismal. The only reason I go to one of them is for the movie theater.

It could be worse though. I stopped in one mall in southern California, and it had a Sears one one end, JC Penney's on the other, and NOTHING in between except kiosks and a Mrs. Fields cookies.

[Pro Libertate]

Better make that forty-somethings pushing baby carriages.

[sixstring]

Why does the FTC hate noses?

[hmm]

Either the propaganda has been getting increasingly thicker and thicker or I didn't notice it before. The Republicans were so far out of touch their attempts were laughable to everyone, the liberals are much more capable at reaching people who have yet to form an opinion (young people). Of course I guess you could argue the same through out history, but I'd say the availability of information to younger generations increases the danger.

STRANGER DANGER!!

[Mango Punch]

I watched 15 seconds of that video and almost died it was so bad. No matter how good your message is, if your medium sucks it'll never work. The contrapositive is also true as is seen in Obama winning the presidency.

[ChicagoTom]

I've been to plenty of malls, and none of them had 3 pizza places. In fact, they only had one pizza place, and that place would freak the fuck out if the mall leased space to other pizza places to compete against it.

In fact many lease agreements would prevent the owner of said mall from leasing space to a direct competitor at the food court. That's why you usually won't see a BK in the same food court as McD's or a Pizza hut in a food court with Sbarro.

[thew83]

Was that the shopping center in Innsmouth...?

[Matthew]

Damn you Sixstring, you beat me to it.

[SIV]

That's not like the malls in the ATL.Where are the fleeing smash-and-grab crews with arm loads of jewelry and designer jeans?

[Mike Laursen]

They look like teens from the TV show Arthur

Arthur's Shoplifting Trouble

[Mike Laursen]

The lessons are encourage economic literacy, pro-trade attitudes, and mall map reading skills.

Not so fast. Listen in on the conversation about mergers and monopolies at the ice cream place. It explains why we need the FTC in there trust-busting ice cream barons.

[Logic Pedant]

No matter how good your message is, if your medium sucks it'll never work. The contrapositive is also true as is seen in Obama winning the presidency.

The contrapositive of a true statement is always true. Here that would be "If your message always works, then the medium doesn't suck." I think you mean the converse, that is, "If your medium doesn't suck, then it will sometimes work."

[Tulpa]

The message I got from this is that if you're in the pizza business, don't open your shop right next to two other pizza places in a tiny mall.

Also, no noses, no service.

[nh]

Went to the galleria in Houston today.

That place is FAR from dead. I saw no empty spaces, and tons and tons of rich teens, parents, and whole families gallivanting with bags from Nieman Marcus,and other various designer boutique stores.

There was plenty of shopping going on at other stores too, express, gap, old navy etc had plenty of teens in them as well.

One thing I want to know is, a majority of the high rollers I see in the Galleria are middle eastern. What is it they do to have so much wealth? I want in!

[thew83]

Have a middle-easternplasty.

[some fed]

If the agency actually responsible for international trade scuffles had put this out (instead of the agency reponsible for domestic issues like antitrust and consumer fraud), I'd be more optimistic.

Recent free trade news: Chinese car and light truck tires are too cheap! ITC recommends raising tariffs temporarily to %55.

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