Fight Big Gummint and Make Money While Doing It: Sam Adams Alliance Contest

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Everyday thousands of activists fight big government and come away with nothing but frustration, legal bills, property losses, or worse.

We at the Sam Adams Alliance understand that standing up to government corruption and bureaucracy is hard work, so we created the Sammies, awards that recognize exceptional citizen activism.

With prizes ranging from $1,000 to $10,000, the Sammies seek to inspire more people to stand up for good government practices in their communities

More info here. And a vid that explains it all is below.

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  1. 21 Economic Models using Cows

    SOCIALISM
    You have 2 cows.
    You give one to your neighbour.
    COMMUNISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes both and gives you some milk.
    FASCISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes both and sells you some milk.
    NAZISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes both and shoots you.
    BUREAUCRATISM
    You have 2 cows.
    The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk
    away…
    TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
    You have two cows.
    You sell one and buy a bull.
    Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
    You sell them and retire on the income.
    SURREALISM
    You have two giraffes.
    The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.
    AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
    Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why the cow has dropped dead.
    ENRON VENTURE CAPITALISM
    You have two cows.
    You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of
    credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity
    swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back,
    with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are
    transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by
    the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your
    listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an
    option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United
    States , leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release.
    The public then buys your bull.
    A FRENCH CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You go on strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you want
    three cows.
    A JAPANESE CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and
    produce twenty times the milk. You then create a clever cow cartoon image
    called ‘Cowkimon’ and market it worldwide.
    A GERMAN CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk
    themselves.
    AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
    You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are.
    You decide to have lunch.
    A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You count them and learn you have five cows.
    You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
    You count them again and learn you have 2 cows.
    You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.
    A SWISS CORPORATION
    You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you.
    You charge the owners for storing them.
    A CHINESE CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You have 300 people milking them.
    You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.
    You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.
    AN INDIAN CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    You worship them.
    A BRITISH CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    Both are mad.
    AN IRAQI CORPORATION
    Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.
    You tell them that you have none.
    No-one believes you, so they bomb you and invade your
    country.
    You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy…
    AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    Business seems pretty good.
    You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.
    A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION
    You have two cows.
    The one on the left looks very attractive.

  2. Good one, Jack.

    I have an idea for this contest. I’m so lazy though and I never get stuff

  3. Everyday thousands of activists fight big government…

    OMG! OMG! OMG!

    It’s EVERY DAY! Two words! AHHHHHH

    Can I get an award for fighting big grammar errors?

  4. Haha, that is a good joke. I have seen it done with Religions too

  5. “Haha, that is a good joke. I have seen it done with Religions too”

    Your link produced this…

    Put a Clove of Garlic in Your Ass

    Ever had a hemorrhoid? Ever have the urge to fart and kill vampires? Well apparently this is the home remedy for you! I recently picked up a book with tons of home remedies. All crazy and seemingly disturbing for various illness’s. Well I noted that the cure for hemorrhoids was to place a clove of garlic in your bum. I figure the book must be nuts.
    5 minutes on google though…

  6. I drink a Sam Adams almost every day. Does that make me an honorary member?

  7. Paul Jacob deserves this award for fighting the red state goobers in Oklahoma. Too bad he’s associated with the Sammies.

  8. Statement of Congressman Ron Paul
    United States House of Representatives

    Statement on Federal Reserve Board Abolition Act

    February 3, 2009

    Madame Speaker, I rise to introduce legislation to restore financial stability to America’s economy by abolishing the Federal Reserve. Since the creation of the Federal Reserve, middle and working-class Americans have been victimized by a boom-and-bust monetary policy. In addition, most Americans have suffered a steadily eroding purchasing power because of the Federal Reserve’s inflationary policies. This represents a real, if hidden, tax imposed on the American people.

    From the Great Depression, to the stagflation of the seventies, to the current economic crisis caused by the housing bubble, every economic downturn suffered by this country over the past century can be traced to Federal Reserve policy. The Fed has followed a consistent policy of flooding the economy with easy money, leading to a misallocation of resources and an artificial “boom” followed by a recession or depression when the Fed-created bubble bursts.

    With a stable currency, American exporters will no longer be held hostage to an erratic monetary policy. Stabilizing the currency will also give Americans new incentives to save as they will no longer have to fear inflation eroding their savings. Those members concerned about increasing America’s exports or the low rate of savings should be enthusiastic supporters of this legislation.

    Though the Federal Reserve policy harms the average American, it benefits those in a position to take advantage of the cycles in monetary policy. The main beneficiaries are those who receive access to artificially inflated money and/or credit before the inflationary effects of the policy impact the entire economy. Federal Reserve policies also benefit big spending politicians who use the inflated currency created by the Fed to hide the true costs of the welfare-warfare state. It is time for Congress to put the interests of the American people ahead of special interests and their own appetite for big government.

    Abolishing the Federal Reserve will allow Congress to reassert its constitutional authority over monetary policy. The United States Constitution grants to Congress the authority to coin money and regulate the value of the currency. The Constitution does not give Congress the authority to delegate control over monetary policy to a central bank. Furthermore, the Constitution certainly does not empower the federal government to erode the American standard of living via an inflationary monetary policy.

    In fact, Congress’ constitutional mandate regarding monetary policy should only permit currency backed by stable commodities such as silver and gold to be used as legal tender. Therefore, abolishing the Federal Reserve and returning to a constitutional system will enable America to return to the type of monetary system envisioned by our nation’s founders: one where the value of money is consistent because it is tied to a commodity such as gold. Such a monetary system is the basis of a true freemarket economy.

    In conclusion, Mr. Speaker, I urge my colleagues to stand up for working Americans by putting an end to the manipulation of the money supply which erodes Americans’ standard of living, enlarges big government, and enriches well-connected elites, by cosponsoring my legislation to abolish the Federal Reserve.

  9. Goddamn you to hell, anonymous Ron Paul speech spammer. You are a one-man argument against the free market.

  10. The Sam Adams Alliance rocks! It’s nice that there is an organization that is actually trying to make a difference instead of just bitching and complaining about the country.

  11. the people who run the sam adams alliance might want to change its name. yes, i’m aware of the revolutionary patriot and also the beer; unfortunately, sam adams is also the name of the mayor of portland, oregon, who has recently acknowledged a passionate makeout session with a 17 year-old boy in the portland city hall men’s room, a relationship which was fully consummated shortly after the boy in question (google “beau breedlove”) turned 18, or maybe even before that.

  12. From the Iraqi bit:
    “You still have no cows, but at least now you are part of a Democracy…”

    you need to add
    And can now pursue the TraditionalCapitalism model without being fed into a chipper.

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