Foreign Policy

Al Qaeda No. 2 Slags U.S., Iran, Sunnis, Starbucks Coffee

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From the AP, via the Cincy Enquirer:

Al-Qaida's No. 2 said in an audiotape released Friday that the United States will lose whether it stays in Iraq or withdraws, and he sneered that President Bush just wants to pass the problem on to his successor….

"The truth is that if Bush keeps all his forces in Iraq until doomsday and until they enter hell, they will only see crisis and defeat by the will of God," said al-Zawahri, the deputy of al-Qaida chief Osama bin Laden.

"If the American forces leave, they will lose everything. And if they stay, they will bleed to death," he said….

He said Tehran "has clear goals, which are the annexation of southern Iraq and the east of the Arabian Peninsula" as well as strengthening ties to its followers in southern Lebanon.

He said that if Iran achieves its goals, "this will add oil to the fire which is already ablaze. This will explode the situation in an already exploding region."

The tape, which is titled "Five Years of the Invasion of Iraq and Decades of Injustice by Tyrants," couldn't be verified but the AP noted it "the logo of al-Qaida's media wing," for what that's worth. Al-Zawahiri also trashed Iraqi Sunnis who created "Awakening Councils" and joined up with American forces.

More here.

What say you, Hit & Runners? Is A-Z right that U.S. options are all bad? That God is on al Qaeda's side? That Iran is on the march regionally? That the title of this audiotape sounds like a track from Love's Forever Changes? And shouldn't he be asking whether al Qaeda is bleeding to death in Iraq and elsewhere?

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  1. “Five Years of the Invasion of Iraq and Decades of Injustice by Tyrants”

    Are they ripping off one of your GWOT story titles Nick?

    How many times did Mr. Al-Zawahiri say quagmire? You really can’t tell how much someone talking like this cares about the issue without an accurate quagmire count.

  2. Gillespie, as your man Greg Gutfeld would say, Iran knows southern Iraq like I know restraining orders.

  3. I think that for one trillion dollars we could have a better head enemy. I’m thinking an Ernst Blofeld or Dr. No (hell, anybody from S.P.E.C.T.R.E), or at least Dr. Evil for comedic effect.

  4. Yes, but who does number two work for?

  5. All I know is that it’s Warren’s fault.

  6. You really can’t tell how much someone talking like this cares about the issue without an accurate quagmire count.

    I lost count when I was 16. Giggity giggity!

  7. All I know is that it’s Warren’s fault.

    Haha… yes!

  8. Starbucks? Huh?

  9. I’m concerned about a growing quagmire gap.

  10. Except for the whole bit about the US losing, he has the same assessment of the geopolitical situation as the current US President and all three major candidates. Sounds like Al-Qaeda is pandering for campaign donations.

  11. Yes, but who does number two work for?

    Me. I’ll be in the bathroom.

  12. Who is Number 1?

    I didn’t know al Qaeda opposed Starbucks. Perhaps they aren’t entirely crazy, at least as far as their political views on coffee-dispensing hegemony go.

  13. I think that for one trillion dollars we could have a better head enemy. I’m thinking an Ernst Blofeld or Dr. No (hell, anybody from S.P.E.C.T.R.E), or at least Dr. Evil for comedic effect.

    Herrrrooooooooo! 😀

  14. I’m not sure about the God part but, yes, all of our options are bad. Even the option of saying, sorry, we fucked up real bad and then leave immediately.

  15. I didn’t know al Qaeda opposed Starbucks. Perhaps they aren’t entirely crazy, at least as far as their political views on coffee-dispensing hegemony go.

    Who do you think the guys with black hoodies and red bandannas, throwing newspaper boxes and rocks through the windows of Starbucks are? Well organized Anarchists or something?

  16. Al Quida* and neocons alike misjude the realities in Iraq. Neither a setarian rep[resentative government, or an Iranian dominated toadie is in Iraq’s future. A typical middle east Arab strongman s how it will all play out. He will rally his people by railing at the jews, bleeding the country’s oil wealth dry.

    *Al Queda? This is getting as difficult as spelling Quadaffi.

  17. Guy,

    Huh. I always thought they were with Dunkin’ Donuts.

  18. I like the part of about the US working with Iran. They must have intel that I ate with Ahmadinejad just last Tuesday!

  19. This reminds me of how Marxists used to talk. They’d provide some pretty insightful analysis and criticism of a crisis or situation, but when you get to the “So then what?” part, you get, “There will be spontaneous demonstrations amond the workers, expressing their gratitude and joy.”

    1. Expansion of Iranian influence

    2. ?

    3. Glorious triumph of Wahabbist Islam!

  20. This man is by far the most important in al-Qaeda, and his story is entirely neglected by the media. Bin Laden’s chosen biographer has stated that he believes he was the one with the brains to do 9/11. But, more importantly, the former FSB (post-Soviet KGB) agent Alexander Litvinenko, who died under incredibly suspicious circumstances almost certainly for the information that he divulged, alleged that al-Zawahiri was trained by the FSB for six months. His story is corroborated by another FSB defector, as well as by the utter unbelievability of al-Zawahiri and the FSB’s official accounts of what happened during those six months. He was supposedly released just a few months before he joined up with bin Laden and then released their famous fatwa that essentially started anti-American terrorism as we know it. Given the Russians’ obvious history of black flag terrorism operations (give some Muslims an idea, weapons, and logistical support [or, if it’s inside Russia, skip the Chechens and just do it yourself!], have them commit an act of terrorism, and then pretend to be against terrorism so that the world won’t ask too many questions), it’s entirely bizarre that I haven’t heard anyone (except John Birch Society types) propound the theory that FSB was the catalyst for al-Qaeda’s recent wave of attacks (9/11, Madrid, 7/7). This man is the connection between the FSB and al-Qaeda, and no one gives a shit.

  21. Don’t woory. If he’s the #2 guy, we’ll get him.
    How many #2 guys have we waxed to date?
    A whole shitload, that’s how many.

  22. I think that for one trillion dollars we could have a better head enemy.

    Yeah, really. He’s gotten to be a joke. I was waiting for him for him to promise that the infidels would soon meet their doom courtesy of Islamic sharks with frickin laser beams on their heads, inshallah.

    He’s just flailing around with left-wing talking points now. Where’s that nutty megalomaniacism we used to know and love?

    And shouldn’t he be asking whether al Qaeda is bleeding to death in Iraq and elsewhere?

    Nick, I have new faith in you.

    Gillespie, as your man Greg Gutfeld would say, Iran knows southern Iraq like I know restraining orders.

    Most Arabs don’t like taking orders from Persians. Iran might be able to finance a few militias here and there, but the mullahs aren’t even all that popular in their own country.

  23. How many #2 guys have we waxed to date?

    You’re thinking of #3 guys. We’ve killed a whole shipload of #3 guys.

    The al Qaeda charter creates three constitutional offices; Mastermind, Vice-Mastermind, and Keeper of the GPS Beacon.

  24. Most Arabs don’t like taking orders from Persians. Iran might be able to finance a few militias here and there, but the mullahs aren’t even all that popular in their own country.

    But remember, if we leave, the Iranians will take over.

  25. Look Mr. Evil. . . .

  26. Stephen Smith,
    you said:
    “it’s entirely bizarre that I haven’t heard anyone (except John Birch Society types) propound the theory that FSB was the catalyst for al-Qaeda’s recent wave of attacks (9/11, Madrid, 7/7). This man is the connection between the FSB and al-Qaeda, and no one gives a shit.”

    so are you saying you want more JBS types coming around here? Please! Buckley helped our movement get rid of all the nutballs and now your trying to recruit the anti-semites back? doesn’t make any sense. If you want to know what happened during 9/11, 7/7, Bali and Madrid then just listen and read Guliani, Philip Bobbitt, Max Boot, Chertoff, Richard Haas, Gary Hart. Hell read the 9/11 commission report! Anyone with a brain knows that islamofacists attacked us and are trying to kill us everyday and your either with us or against us!

  27. A-Z is a #2 alright.

  28. so are you saying you want more JBS types coming around here?

    No, I’m just pointing out that oddly enough, they are the only people whose ideology allows them to uncover the truth in this case. Neocons have a fantasy that the Soviet Union ended with the fall of the Berlin Wall and have become infatuated with Russia due to its alleged status as a fellow victim of those evil, bad Islamo-fascists. Liberals, as they did during the Cold War, would prefer to ignore Russia’s transgressions. And libertarians are blind-sighted by America’s (admittedly horrific) missteps in the past which they believe allowed Islamic terrorism to flourish. Which is partly true, but definitely not the whole story.

    Anyway, regardless of where you are politically, it’s pretty unconsciounable how no major media source has bothered to examine the trail that links al-Qaeda to the FSB. They were all over Litvinenko’s bizarre death, and all over the investigation into who did it (as if it matters – it’s blazingly obvious to anyone with a brain cell that the order originated in Moscow), but none that I was aware of even bothered to repeat Litvinenko’s allegations – that Lubyanka is the global center of terrorism; that Russia’s terrrorist attacks were commited by the FSB and blamed on the Chechens in order to start the Second Chechen War; that al-Qaeda’s al-Zawahiri is an “old agent” of the FSB; and that Italy is teeming with FSB agents, including Romano Prodi himself (“our man in Italy”). Speaking of Italy, does anyone remember what secret service was trying to pass off the forget Saddam-trying-to-buy-uranium-from-Niger story? I believe it was some peninsular country with a corruption problem that was accused in the Mitrokhin archives of harboring tons of KGB spies, but I just can’t for the life of me remember which one!

  29. Is A-Z right that U.S. options are all bad? That God is on al Qaeda’s side? That Iran is on the march regionally? That the title of this audiotape sounds like a track from Love’s Forever Changes? And shouldn’t he be asking whether al Qaeda is bleeding to death in Iraq and elsewhere?

    Well I’m not sure, but if you like I can ask my Magic Eight Ball.

    What is clear, is that while Iraq is nothing like Vietnam, the US today is nearly the same creature it was during the Vietnam war. At least in most ways that matter.

    The MSM, and US universities, are predominantly run by post modernist, liberal left pacifists. And this remains true no matter how many liberal left pacifists care to jump and say “it ain’t so”. These people are painting one of the pictures we get of Iraq and of course it isn’t pretty.

    But when I talk to soldiers who’ve been in Iraq (and I’ve talked to many), the stories I hear them tell are nothing like what the MSM is telling us.

    I’m married into a Vietnamese family and have talked to many who were in the South Vietnamese army and government. Likewise, the stories I hear them tell are nothing like the picture I get from our MSM, and most of the books written about the Vietnam war since then.

    What do you expect from pacifists? They’re consistent, but their view of how the world really works is sadly mistaken.

    I’m convinced that Vietnam is a war the US could have won, if it wanted to. Whether it should have been fighting that war is an entirely different matter.

    Meanwhile, in the other corner we have the war hawks. Their best and brightest today are apparently Bush and Rumsfeld, which I submit as proof that the war hawks have been lobotomized, today just as they were during Vietnam. These people paint the other picture we get of Iraq, and its credibility is doubtful.

    The hawks push us into wars of questionable merit. The pacifists, meanwhile, have made themselves full time volunteer members of the US military. Their job is simply to be there and bitch, whatever may happen. The end result is as predictable today as it was in 1968 during the Tet Offensive (which both the MSM and Washington lied about in their own ways).

    That we fight wars of questionable merit is bad. That we fight such wars and then loose them, is a monstrous injustice.

  30. Is A-Z right that….Iran is on the march regionally?

    Some facts manage to rise up through the murk of opposing agendas anyway. Is there anyone who doubts Iran has regional ambitions?

    And shouldn’t he be asking whether al Qaeda is bleeding to death in Iraq and elsewhere?

    He probably should. But then, al Qaeda is just a koan. It is an orginization, without being an orginization. It is an anti-orginization with mysterious, informally and loosely and ill-defined orginizationally non-orginized ways, and it is made up of people you cannot see or smell or taste or touch. And these people, they drink Starbucks coffee just to fake you out.

    Where’s my Eight Ball?

  31. But remember, if we leave, the Iranians will take over.

    The Iranians seem to be doing well enough in Palestine and Lebanon. If we leave Iraq the way it is today, it’ll be the same kind of environment and we can expect the Iranians to do at least well there.

    Arabs may not like taking orders from Persians, any more than they liked taking orders from Turks. But Arabs aren’t strong enough to have a whole lot of choice in the matter.

  32. I do not see much future for Al-Qaida. An organization that thought my 90 year old grandmother was a threat is rather unimpressive. If we keep standing our ground, the long term trend is towards more freedom and peace. A case in point, Jordan just launched a youtube channel to counter people like al-Zawahri who mix Islam and violence.

  33. If we’re clever enough to get to bin Laden and manage to kill him, we must also kill anyone who saw us kill him, and then keep our mouths shut. Because if it gets out that bin Laden is dead, he becomes a martyr and we’ve had the weenie. But our current president, on finding out, will likely broadcast his victory to the world, and we will suffer severe consequences. Hold your tongue, GWB.

  34. the long term trend is towards more freedom and peace.

    Only in the minds of deluded western Europeans. The same ones that dreamed up the UN.

    A case in point, Jordan just launched a youtube channel to counter people like al-Zawahri who mix Islam and violence.

    Oh wow, youtube to the rescue.

    Get a grip on the real world if you can, my child. Before it eats you alive.

  35. If we’re clever enough to get to bin Laden and manage to kill him

    If we managed to kill bin Laden it wouldn’t make a rat’s ass difference. Who will his death arouse, that isn’t already aroused?

    The “we gotta get bin Laden so what are we doing in Iraq?” line is so much hot air. It’s al Qaeda’s capabilities that matter. bin Laden is just the figure head of the Zen Beast we call al Qaeda.

    What is curiously absent most of the time, is the question of whether Iraq and Afghanistan are really in fact hampering al Qaeda and similar groups, or not.

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