Religion

Senate Chamber "Violated By a False Hindu God"

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The best perk of my job is the surreal press releases. This one just arrived in my inbox. Here's the lede:

Ante Pavkovic, Kathy Pavkovic, and Kristen Sugar were all arrested in the chambers of the United States Senate as that chamber was violated by a false Hindu god. The Senate was opened with a Hindu prayer placing the false god of Hinduism on a level playing field with the One True God, Jesus Christ. This would never have been allowed by our Founding Fathers.

You laugh, but in 1802 a pistol-wielding Aaron Burr single-handedly fought off a dozen Thuggees as they tried to invade the Senate floor and sacrifice Gideon Granger, the virgin postmaster general, to the devil-goddess Kali. Later Burr would use the same skilled gunplay to kill Alexander Hamilton. Of course, that was before the cultural rot of the '60s set in.

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  1. To Schedule Interviews with Rev. Benham:

    Contact Pat McEwen: 321 431 3962

    Please! Please, for God’s sake, contact Pat McEwen. Somebody, anybody. Please?

    Pay attention to us! That’s it, I’m holding my breath!

  2. ‘TaFuck?

  3. LOL, you cut the money quote:

    Not one Senator had the backbone to stand as our Founding Fathers stood. They stood on the Gospel of Jesus Christ!

  4. Groovy! When does the Church of Satan, Scientology and Islam get their days?

    LOL.

  5. you cut the money quote

    I had to stop somewhere or I would have republished the whole thing…

  6. Not one Senator had the backbone to stand as our Founding Fathers stood. They stood on the Gospel of Jesus Christ!

    I’ll happily stand on the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Barefoot, if necessary.

  7. Groovy! When does the Church of Satan, Scientology and Islam get their days?

    I believe there was a Muslim prayer in 1993, so I guess we’re already living under dhimmitude or whatnot. As to the others, given the apparent amount of time a religion must exist before they get one shot at an opening prayer, I’d say CoS and Scientology have a millennia or so.

  8. Aaron Burr = America’s first badass. He single-handedly retrieved Ben Franklin’s magic Illuminati bifocals from the Barbary pirates. In North Africa, he’s still known as simply “The Gathering Darkness.”

  9. Getting press releases like this is the best perk of your job? I always assumed it was feeling superior to trolls.

  10. If you want one religion to have a prayer in a public place, you have to have them all.

    We had some silly controversy just south of where I live in Chesterfield, VA when a Wicca wanted to give the opening prayer before the county council met.

    So let me ask any religious conservative on here, if prayer were re-introduced to public schools would you allow a Satanist to give a prayer over the public intercom?

  11. i don’t get it. what happened?

  12. The Senate was opened with a Hindu prayer placing the false god of Hinduism on a level playing field with the One True God, Jesus Christ. This would never have been allowed by our Founding Fathers.

    But, apparently, it was allowed by God…say, are they placing the Founding Fathers are on a level above God?

  13. Oh, I see. Operation Save America, aka Operation Rescue. Check their website:

    “It will be our privilege to bring the Gospel of Christ to the gates of hell in Birmingham, Alabama, this summer once again.”

    Who knew the gates of hell were in Alabama?
    You’d think they’d advertise it more. Think of the tourism revenue.

  14. Cesar,
    You don’t get it. It’s only prayer to the one true God that’s allowed, not the bar-bar-bar of all those heathens.

  15. If you want one religion to have a prayer in a public place, you have to have them all.

    Ia! Ia! Cthulhu ftaghn!

  16. Not one Senator had the backbone to stand as our Founding Fathers stood. They stood on the Gospel of Jesus Christ!

    Sadly, this was not the result of some religious devotion, but rather, it was due to the fact that they made lecterns very tall back then…

  17. Getting press releases like this is the best perk of your job? I always assumed it was feeling superior to trolls.

    Surreal press releases are funny. Trolls are just depressing.

  18. My house is supposed to be a den of thieves, but you have turned it into a place of prayer for all peoples!

  19. Who knew the gates of hell were in Alabama?

    They’re in an abandoned mineshaft in Red Mountain, below the statue of the Roman god Vulcan.

  20. Now why are trolls depressing? I should think that making Hit & Run an echo chamber for tiresome libertarian platitudes would be depressing.

  21. Surreal press releases are funny.

    Yeah, but the humor value of those Westboro Baptist Church press releases wears off after a while.

  22. squidward – cause trolling is, ultimately, a depressing phenomenon.

  23. Of course, that was before the cultural rot of the ’60s set in.

    Yes, the 1860s were terrible years.

  24. DAR: Indeed, it’s about time we had a John Wilkes Booth day to celebrate that national hero.

  25. Who knew the gates of hell were in Alabama?

    Everyone who lives here.

  26. This would never have been allowed by our Founding Fathers.

    Which ones, the deists or the libertines?

    Thomas Paine especially would never have stood for this. Quite the contrary. He would have forbidden all forms of prayers, the little atheist.

  27. Apparently the Gates of Hell are located in Philadelphia, Paris, and Tokyo, with later branches in Zurich, Seoul, and Stanford University.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Gates_of_Hell#Locations.

    I’ve seen the Stanford one, and it is indeed impressive.

  28. Who knew the gates of hell were in Alabama?

    Does anyone remember the Pinky and The Brain episode where Brain goes to hell to save Pinky’s soul because Pinky sold it to the devil for Brain to get the world (or something like that)? The gate to hell was located behind the DMV! FUCKING BRILLIANT!

  29. The reaction of religious conservatives to non-Christian, especially Muslim, prayers in public places is useful for throwing back in their faces when they declare that government endoresement of Christian prayer, symbols, and scripture in now way persecutes non-Christians nor violates the Establishment Clause.

  30. I should think that making Hit & Run an echo chamber for tiresome libertarian platitudes would be depressing.

    Fortunately, there’s no threat of that happening, given the widely divergent beliefs of the libertarians who comment here, and given the many non-libertarian non-trolls of the left and right who come to this site, marshal real arguments, and enliven the debate.

    By definition, trolls don’t do that. They just come across as rude and stupid, and thus serve as a depressing reminder of all the rude and stupid people in the world.

  31. What? No prayers to URKUBOLD?

    Smite the infidels!

  32. Trolls? I thought the perks of reason magazine editors were the hot chicks and cold beer?

  33. SPD,

    Don’t you know ALL the founders were devout evangelical Christians (any evidence to the contrary including their own words is pure leftist fabrication!) who fully intended on a full out Christian nation but just forgot to put it in the constitution!

  34. I thought the perks of reason magazine editors were the hot chicks and cold beer?

    You’re thinking of The Watchtower.

  35. I thought it was all the weed donated from the guys at NORML.

  36. So what exactly happened? There was a hindu prayer, some crazy fundies disrupted it, and they got tossed in jail?

  37. What sort of intelligent debate are you trying to foster with this silly press release from a nutso Christian outfit?
    Rudeness and stupidity are far more common here than real arguments, especially in response to real arguments. Most of the posts for discussion invite scoffing at some failure to grasp the sacred truths of the libertaian faith.

  38. Is there any way that we can get the Urkobold into the Congressional Record? It seems appropriate, somehow.

    Maybe my mania for the Censor is misplaced. Maybe we should just give the Urkobold a branch of His own, where, instead of actually having any political function, He just has the absolute power to make snide remarks about anyone or anything in government. The most bully of bully pulpits.

  39. You’re thinking of The Watchtower.

    I suspected that All along.

  40. What sort of intelligent debate are you trying to foster with this silly press release from a nutso Christian outfit?

    None, of course.

    Rudeness and stupidity are far more common here than real arguments, especially in response to real arguments. Most of the posts for discussion invite scoffing at some failure to grasp the sacred truths of the libertaian faith.

    I’ve had the misfortune of reading a lot of your comments over the last few months, Edward. I can’t remember a single one that even attempted to present an argument. There’s an awful lot of witless scoffing in them, though.

    Wasn’t I just telling someone the other day that it’s best not to try to engage you in conversation? I’d better take my own advice.

  41. By Odin’s beard!

    I pray to the almighty Thor to slam all non-believers with his hammer of mercy so that they may see the error of their ways.

    I love false gods they take themselves far less seriously

  42. You can have lots of fun taking apart the grammatical irregularities in these things. In this one, was the prayer to Hinduism, (I kinda doubt it) or to an unspecified particular Hindu deity? IIRC, Hinduism has more than a billion gods, all of whom are supposedly names for The One, so was this to the One, or one of the crowd? If they’re not going to specify, why bother?

  43. The reaction of religious conservatives to non-Christian, especially Muslim, prayers in public places is useful for throwing back in their faces when they declare that government endorsement of Christian prayer, symbols, and scripture in now way persecutes non-Christians nor violates the Establishment Clause.

    And don’t forget that, given the chance, they’d be just as quick to denounce most Christian denominations.

    Don’t you know ALL the founders were devout evangelical Christians (any evidence to the contrary including their own words is pure leftist fabrication!) who fully intended on a full out Christian nation but just forgot to put it in the constitution!

    Actually they didn’t forget. The last part of Article VI reads, “no religious test shall ever be required as a qualification to any office or public trust under the United States.”

  44. oddly enough the duel’s anniversary was yesterday

  45. I wish someone, once and for all, would trounce the myth that all the founders were believing fundamentalist Christians.

    They ranged from evangelical Christians(Benjamin Rush), to occasionally church-going Episcopalians (George Washington) to Unitarians (John Adams) to Deists who flirted with outright atheism (Thomas Jefferson).

  46. “The Senate was opened with a Hindu prayer placing the false god of Hinduism on a level playing field with the One True God, Jesus Christ.”

    So their real beef is with Divine Affirmative Action.

  47. Someone should tell these people that the story of Jesus is just a retelling of the story of the Egyptian god Horus from 3000 b.c..

  48. All of this chatter is all well and good, but why is there no follow-up as to WHAT EXACTLY HAPPENED? It seems like complete nonsense on its face, but did this actually happen? Did someone actually go to jail? Who put them there?

    WTF is going on??

  49. Wasn’t I just telling someone the other day that it’s best not to try to engage you in conversation? I’d better take my own advice.

    SNAP! Dude just got troll-served.

  50. Someone should send these people a copy of the Jefferson’s Bible and a printout of Wikipedia’s entry on Deism.

    What is it with these people? How is it that Evangelical Christians can’t be bothered to read the Gospel, the Constitution, *or* the Federalist Papers?

  51. I wish someone, once and for all, would trounce the myth that all the founders were believing fundamentalist Christians.

    Sadly, I fear we will never truly know the beliefs of some of the founding fathers. Even with all of the freedoms they created, there was plenty of social pressure at the time to claim Jebus as your personal lord and savior.

    I mean, shit, even today atheists are considered by many to be nutjobs. If it makes me a nutjob, than I be a proud nutjob.

  52. Does anyone know, are there any “out” atheists serving in congress?

  53. Taktix?-

    I think the only reason some of them weren’t out and out atheists was because Origin of the Species hadn’t been written yet.

  54. Surreal is right… these people were actually arrested?!?!

  55. Cesar,

    True, plus you never know when to expect the Spanish Inquisition

  56. Edward: What sort of intelligent debate are you trying to foster with this silly press release from a nutso Christian outfit?

    Jesse Walker: None, of course.

    Edward: So what’s the point in posting it? To scoff, perhaps?

  57. Reinmoose,
    This is the most I’ve heard on the subject.

    “In March we made the announcement of the first ever self-identified nontheist member of Congress. Rep. Pete Stark’s (D-Calif.) public notice of his nontheism through our contest to find the highest level nontheistic elected official generated hundreds of articles.”

  58. Edward, dude, please stop embarrassing yourself.

  59. mediageek

    Can’t you follow Jesse’s advice? And don’t call me “dude.”

  60. ProGLib,

    Zod will probably instate a religious test to the oath:

    Do you kneel before Zod?

    Yes? Good.

    Do you kneel before any other than Zod?

    Yes? Oh, too bad. We won’t be swearing you in. Now die.”

  61. Let’s see, in the spirit of this post and it’s intent–Wow, those fundamentalist Christians sure are stoopid. What more can be said?

  62. Edward: So what’s the point in posting it? To scoff, perhaps?

    If it deserves to be scoffed, then yes.

    The individuals outraged by this non-Christian opening prayer are among those who believe that the Bill of Rights begins with the Second Amendment. PC lefties deserve no less scorn.

  63. judging from the thread, quite a bit squidward.

  64. Yes, Zod’s way is better. Simpler. Fairer.

    In fact, Zod will solve joe’s issues with mortgage lending by instituting the death penalty for people who default on their loan obligations.

  65. Can’t you follow Jesse’s advice? And don’t call me “dude.”

    Dude, I was just trying to help you out.

    *shrugs, walks away.*

  66. It occurs to me that it’s hard to imagine such a thing happening in any other western democracy, so maybe the point is to highlight American backwardness. On the other hand, what does American backwardness have to do with libertarianism? Will a libertarian society with a minimal state be less prone to religious fanaticism? Who knows? There has never been a truly libertarian society with a state minimal enough to meet libertarian standards. I’m trying to find a point here.

  67. You’re a day late and a dollar short, dude.

  68. I’m trying to find a point here.

    Try harder.

  69. I’m trying to find a point here.

    Try harder.

    Aha, you really can’t follow your own advice, can you? Okay, I give up. What is the point?

  70. “I’m trying to find a point here.”

    Edward, maybe the point that you should try to find in this is that it is just kinda funny. Lighten up……..dude.

  71. JLM

    Oh! Ha, Ha.

  72. Gee, Hit & Run is fun.

  73. Oh, dude! DUDE!

    Jesse Walker is da man!

    Jesse Walker pwns trolls.

    Jesse Walker takes trolls, dresses them up like Strawberry Shortcake, pops binkies in their mouths, smacks their butts, and calls them “Dorothy.”

    And then makes them wash his car and scrape all the gum off the sidewalk.

    Ha, Ha, Ha, Ha!

    HA!

  74. Speaking of “nutso Christian outfits”. WorldNutDaily is on this already.

    http://www.wnd.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=56645

  75. I thought that this was a nutso Christian outfit.

  76. i wear my trollhood with great pride, but that’s cuz i’ve got all those extra arms like kali.

    jw, that’s some funny shit, seriously funny.

  77. Daily Kos will react more strongly against this than if a Muslim group had attempted to behead the polytheistic Hindu priest.
    In your heart, you know it’s true.

    I’m an atheist, by the way. No dog in the fight.

  78. Gee, Hit & Run is fun.

    It’s not supposed to be fun for trolls, Dorothy.

  79. Having met Edward, I’m beginning to rethink that “solution to bad speech is more speech” maxim.

  80. Edward, libertarianism is only 50% of what this magazine is about. It’s actually the contingent 50%, frankly.

    Scoffing at religious fundamentalists is its own reward, bucko. Ba ha ha, ha ha ha ha. See? It’s fun.

    You seem a little sensitive about this topic. Was your mom one of the people arrested or something?

  81. “…but before we call Congress to session, a few inspirational words from Reverend J.R. “Bob” Dobbs…”

  82. I was violated by a false Hindu god once. It turns out she was just some disturbed plushy with an elephant fixation.

  83. Fluffy, I’m all for making fun of religion, but bringing someone’s mom into it? That’s going too far!

    Also, were they really arrested? I could understand being removed from the chambers, but arrested? That’s not right.

  84. I find it outrageous that they still allow prayers to be read in any house of government. I am a Hindu but when it comes to my government I prefer strict secularism to any clergy member of any faith starting the day at the US Senate. As I understand it, most days it is a Christian clergy member. We need to outlaw all religion from the forums of the State. I think it is time for a specific constitutional ban that way it would put to end any snarky delusional comments from the Christian right as well.

  85. I declare Stevo Darkly the winner of this thread.

    Edward, well, you can just feel special for competing at all, dude dorothy.

  86. I thought Jesus was god’s son and not god. But what do i know.

  87. So won’t they have to burn down the Senate building. It’s obviously been defiled by cannibalistic cow worshippers, right? Jesus Christ Man! Yeah!

    stopdrugwar: No, Jesus is God, and he killed himself on the cross (No offense foot worshippers..)

  88. Those who believe Jesus Christ is the one true God should also believe that a Christian prayer should *never* serve as a public invocation. This was made abundantly clear in a direct quote from Jesus:
    ___

    Matthew 6:5 – 6

    5. And when thou prayest, thou shalt not be as the hypocrites [are]: for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and in the corners of the streets, that they may be seen of men. Verily I say unto you, They have their reward.

    6 But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father which seeth in secret shall reward thee openly.

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