Cheap Jokes for Insomniacs: Howley on Red Eye Tonight

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I'll be on Fox News' Red Eye at 2 A.M. Eastern Time, pontificating on Paris, Paris, Paris, and Japanese child robots. 

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  1. Hopefully, you will have swilled some liquor so as to be as snarky as this. But, of course, it gets much better if you scroll down a few posts.

  2. TWC,

    I don’t think anyone can top that.

  3. FLILF- how funny. Kerry’s “the attractiveness of a first lady” comment was funnier because she is a hottie herself.

    WTF is up with all the commercials though? Kerry should definitely announce her appearances, because this night owl won’t invest time in Red Eye’s commercial assault again without foreknowledge of a good guest.

  4. “WTF is up with all the commercials though?”

    They are short films (30 to 120 seconds each) advertising various products and services.

  5. King Buzzo and Kerry Howley. Now that’s an attractive duo…

  6. OK last time she was proposing Ameriwhore in response to the VT shootings. This time she rates the first lady’s fuckability. So tell me again about how I’ve managed to insult and degrade her with my prurient adulation?

  7. Thanks NP.

    Warren, you funny guy.

  8. So tell me again about how I’ve managed to insult and degrade her with my prurient adulation?

    It’s the same logic that encourages women to expose ever-more flesh in public, and at the same time heaps reproach on men who look too long at the newly exposed flesh.

    But let’s not sink to Kerry’s level here.

  9. I hate to say it on a libertarian site, but Paris Hilton is the poster child for inheritance taxes.

  10. I don’t usually complain about this type of thing, but you’ve got to be kidding me. Along with teh rest of the news world, Reason is giving more attention to Paris H. than to the Bush administration firing the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs earlier today.

  11. Ok, which one of you guys is the stalker that emailed the show?

  12. Paris Hilton is the poster child for inheritance taxes.

    Unfortunately, that doesn’t stop her from being a stupid spoiled brat while her parents still live.

  13. Rule of valuation: Anyone who appears on Red Eye should be dismissed out of hand due to the lack of self-respect demonstrated by appearing in that forum. Their opinions should be taken with a serious dose of skepticism, since they show an extreme lack of critical judgment.

    Really.
    Worst show ever broadcast.

  14. Rule of Valuation: If someone appears on a cable snark show with Paris Hilton being the scheduled topic, multiply above mentioned skepticism of their opinions worth by 100.

    At this level, consider their employers lack of judgment…

  15. I’d rather Paris Hilton have her money than Congress.

  16. Worst show ever broadcast.

    Oh come on. Exaggerate much?

    Kerry, I enjoyed watching the show. Of course, I think Gutfeld’s funny. I wonder if Jim Treacher ever shows up on the show.

  17. “Oh come on. Exaggerate much?”

    No.
    Never.

    To clarify, when I say worst ever, I am referring to Red Eye as a program, not a specific episode.

  18. I watched a couple of YouTube clips out of curiosity. So Red Eye is kinda like The View for Freepers?

    Kerry probably has to huff a paper bagful of model-airplane glue just to keep up with the witty repartee.

  19. It has actually grown on me. Maybe because I don’t see Rachel Marsden on there anymore ( did she get fired?). The first couple times I watched it was only for reason staffers, but I now see it most nights ( I dont do the whole sleep thing). I made a post here the first time Howley was on that I thought the show was terrible. It’s grown to tolerable ( for 2am). I prefer it to Poker on NBC ( I used to watch NBC from 11:30pm- 4:30am)

  20. Liberate Paris!!! …if for no other reason than the whine and cheese.

  21. Pro Lib-Give it time; doubtless she’ll decide to take her money on a crusade to make sure that nobody with her fame ever has to go to jail again.

  22. PARIS-HILTON I’m not up that late PARIS-HILTON but I’d watch if I were PARIS-HILTON not that there’s anything else PARIS-HILTON to occupy my time PARIS-HILTON is there? American media PARIS-HILTON is unjustly criticized PARIS-HILTON and we should give them PARIS-HILTON more credit for airing newsworthy PARIS-HILTON items that impact all us PARIS-HILTON humans.

  23. Liberate Paris!!! …if for no other reason than the whine and cheese.

    Lamar, that was great. It was a thread winner. LOL

  24. Paris Hilton is the poster child for inheritance taxes.

    Why?

    Better to spend on, say, bridges to nowhere in Alaska, or some welfare queen in the south Bronx, or a whole pile of bombs, or maybe a bag full of $900.00 hammers, or some CONgressional junkets to the far east, or maybe we could use it to fund some tanks for local police drug wars and no-knock searches, or, how about that Cows-Only lane in Corning Iowa, or we can give grants to people who put Crosses in jars of piss and call it art, or some other noble and higher use.

    God forbid that the person whose money it is decided what to do with it.

  25. TWC: Maybe we should give Paris a break on her taxes if she joins AmeriWhore.

  26. Speaking of which, I’d really like to know if Kerry stole the name “AmeriWhore” from me. You’ll notice that a google search for that term at this site comes up only with my post from May 13…two days before she used the term on Red Eye!

    Next time I’ll know to get my creative terms registered as trademarks before I post them.

  27. “God forbid that the person whose money it is decided what to do with it.”

    If I earn a boatload of cash, I should be able to give it all to my kids. My great-great-great-great-great grandkids is a slightly different story. I think the fear is that we have too many people who never did a thing to earn money but live the high life. Spend a month in NYC and tell me otherwise. If we continue to glorify such sloth, we’ll become soft….like the French.

  28. Yeah, but c’mon, there are entire industries of people who’ve grown wealthy by providing services to logbumps like Paris Hilton.

  29. I’m disappointed. I was going to ask for an archived link to the show because I was under the impression that Kerry had discussed Paris, France on Red Eye. Now that I see it’s Paris H., I’m not so sure that I’m interested in seeing the appearance anymore.

    That picture of her weeping in the cop car was pretty funny, though.

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