Putting the X Back in Xmas

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The American Family Association, Alliance Defense Fund, and Liberty Counsel are not groups to sit idly by while secularists commodify, denigrate, and otherwise trivialize Christmas. And what better way to fight back than with pre-made gift packs?  

The Mississippi-based American Family Association says it has sold more than 500,000 buttons and 125,000 bumper stickers bearing the slogan "Merry Christmas: It's Worth Saying."

The Alliance Defense Fund, a Christian legal aid group that boasts a network of some 900 lawyers standing ready to "defend Christmas," says it has moved about 20,000 "Christmas packs." The packs, available for a suggested $29 donation, include a three-page legal memo and two lapel pins.

And Liberty Counsel, a conservative law firm affiliated with the Rev. Jerry Falwell, says it has sold 12,500 legal memos on celebrating Christmas and 8,000 of its own buttons and bumper stickers.

Leaders say demand for the goods—which are pitched online and through e-mail to supporters—is driven by what they view as a coordinated effort to secularize Christmas.

Gift pack buyers are participants in a longstanding tradition of anti-consumerist consumerism; the larger War on Xmas movement has always been about self-promotion and ratings. And surely something is right with the world when people express their disgust with spiritual drift by purchasing thousands upon thousands of lapel pins.

Elsewhere in Reason: Back in 2003, proud Christianist Jeremy Lott celebrated the Christian culture industry. And in 2004, Contributing Editor Julian Sanchez grokked "the true spirit of Xmas."

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  1. Ha ha. Well done. Boy, it seems like the War on the War on Christmas comes earlier and earlier each year, don’t it?

  2. I was thinking the caterwalling about the War on Christmas was remarkable subdued this year. I think that might be because a couple of the Fox News guys aren’t humping books about in this year.

    Nothing says Baby Jesus to me like passive-agressive Culture War.

    Say Merry Christmas! SAY IT!!! Freaking say Merry Freaking Chrismas!

  3. God rest ye Merry Merchants, may ye make the Yuletide pay.

  4. National Review’s John Derbyshire reports bristling at these two seemingly innocuous words with the sort of fascinated intensity he normally reserves for buggery.

    Now that I’ve learned to detect it, I enjoy David’s tongue-in-cheek humorous touches. But I forgot the jocular delight of Julian’s acerbic bites.

  5. I support staying the course in the War on Christmas.

  6. It’s a strange, strange place we live in.

    What irks you more, the “CHRISTmas” haters or defenders? It used to always be the people whining and filing lawsuits over equal representation of all holidays who were the most annoying… but in the past couple years or so (the “O’Rielly Age”), I find the outrage over the fake war on Christmas (things like everyone shitting a brick over the Rabbi-Airport deal) to be MUCH more annoying… just relax and celebrate the holiday in your own way. The two sides start to sound very similar.

  7. yawn

  8. Mostly I’m annoyed by all the people who constantly whine about either side constantly whin…ing… um…

    nevermind.

  9. Dear Antisecularists:

    You lost this battle, like, 60 years ago.
    Snap out of it. It’s 2006 already.

    Love, Ed

  10. In this sign–?–you will conquer. Merry War on Christmas, everyone!

  11. Does anyone think it’s funny that the lapel pins are probably made in a place that will send you to a prison labor camp if you go to the wrong church?

  12. Mississippi?

  13. What irks you more, the “CHRISTmas” haters or defenders?

    I find them both pretty grating. I can’t muster any sympathy for some prick who gets takes someone else’s well-intentioned holiday greeting as reminder of “the second class status of non-Christians.”. At the same time, I have no use for people who get their panties in a bunch over “Happy Holidays” either.

    Personally, I don’t care what the cashiers say when I’m paying at the store, so long as they get my total and change right.

  14. I find all this bickering truly oppressive. This is not what Xmas is about!

    Xmas is not just some excuse for cheap gifts and shallow spirituality…it’s the one time of year where we can all get together with friends and family and hide from a bloodthirsty robot as he embarks on his yearly killing spree.

    Merry Everything, anyone!

  15. The War on Christmas should be fought the same way the might of Spain was broken in the West Indies – piratically!

    (All the best holidays can be rebranded as pirate-themed festivals, after all. Easter is a treasure-hunting holiday, Halloween is about striking terror into your victims, Thanksgiving celebrates gorging oneself, and Christmas is all about plunder.)

    Forget all the religious trappings; swap your lapel pin for a belaying pin and prepare to set sail on the Yule-tide!

    Santa and the Christ-child alike shall quake in fear, and will strike their colors at our approach! Yarrrr!

    [You know how Akira sometimes geeks out over D&D? I’m that way with piracy… could you tell?]

  16. Pirates are gay.

  17. Is it fucked up that Jake Boone’s pirate holiday idea makes a lot more sense (and sounds much more fun) to me than either side?

  18. And fuck you :-,

    Pirates are THE WHIP!

  19. That’s why you just gotta start saying “Shibat Shalom”. Your not giving into the PC San Fran/NY Freaks and at the same time, your not siding with the idiots from fox news.

    and if someone gets offended, just call them an anti semite.

  20. Forget christmas, this is the best holiday ever:

    http://www.agnostica.com

  21. Everytime you say “Happy Holidays” little baby Jebus throws up a little in his mouth.

  22. Both sides are an inane manifestation of political correctness, the only thing that differs is which group they’re trying to appear ‘correct’ to. Just go with whatever you want. It’s the spirit that matters, not the words or symbols you use. The only real line that could be crossed is the government themselves putting up full blown religious symbols like the nativity on their property.

  23. “In the old days, it was not called the Holiday Season; the Christians called it ‘Christmas’ and went to church; the Jews called it ‘Hanukkah’ and went to synagogue; the atheists went to parties and drank. People passing each other on the street would say ‘Merry Christmas!’ or ‘Happy Hanukkah!’ or (to the atheists) ‘Look out for the wall!'”-Dave Barry

  24. I’m not particularly worried about the war on Christmas. At least not until they reinstitute the draft. It’s friggin cold at the North Pole.

    Besides, we’ve been waging war on poverty and drugs for far longer and they’re more pervasive than ever. If this war follows suit in a few years, kids will be attending church in record numbers.

  25. he normally reserves for buggery.

    Now that I’ve learned to detect it, I enjoy David’s tongue-in-cheek

    Eeeeew!

  26. I think this week’s American Dad said pretty much everything that needs to be said about The War On The War On Christmas. To wit: keep a sense of perspective about it or you might have to back in time and shoot Ronald Reagan.

  27. TWC, I lolled at your quote. 🙂

  28. Surely somebody has started making buttons that read “Merry Christmas: It’s Worth Slaying”.

    Or for the less bloody-minded, “Sleighing”.

  29. Thanks Media, Dave Barry is truly, truly funny.

  30. Don’t let the poofy shirts fool you–pirates aren’t gay. But some of them are manly men.

  31. Is someone going to start a “War against ‘Talk Like a Pirate Day’ now? (That’s the only thing connecting wars, pirates, holidays, and Dave Barry I know of.) Actually, TLAPD is the only exception allowed to the Cox – Spain Law of Holiday and Festival Creation, which is as follows:

    No one is allowed to make up holidays unless that person invents and religion or a country first.

    We developed this in response to the sudden discovery of Kwanzaa, which, so far we knew, no one outside of the Berkeley and the offices of Hallmark actually celebrated. “Talk Like a Pirate Day” is, however so weird we have to give it a pass. It’s also the occasion for a band here in Austin called “The Jolly GaRogers” to get important gigs. I don’t think they have a website or I’d link.

  32. See, the thing is, Harlan and PaganClaws can just end Christmas whenever they want.

    Just say NO. The Jehovah Witnesses have been doing that for decades.

  33. Well, whaddya know. Jolly Garogers I don’t think they have a Christmas album yet.

  34. In some circles this could be called a Zionist Fruitcake Plot and my journal may be one of them very soon!

    Need to add the pirate stuff somehow.

  35. .. fuck Xmas ..

    .. hobbit

  36. Territorial Pissing, that’s all this is. This is a Christian nation, buddy, and don’t you forget it.

    Using the celebration of Christ’s birth the way a dog uses a telephone pole; how inspirational.

  37. joe, you’re an angry lil fella aren’t ya?

  38. I’m willing to look for the good in Christmas, so I celebrate it the way the Japanese do – a little romance, a lot of booze, and a meal of KFC.

    Now Thanksgiving, there’s a holiday that truly sucks!

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