Clooney To Give His Body To Save National Soul

Just in from the newest front in the great war of Geo. Clooney vs. His Fans:

"Here is my theory on debunking photographs in magazines, you know, the paparazzi photographs," Clooney tells Vanity Fair. "I want to spend every single night for three months going out with a different famous actress. You know, Halle Berry one night, Salma Hayek the next, and then walk on the beach holding hands with Leonardo DiCaprio.

"People would still buy the magazines, they'd still buy the pictures, but they would always go, 'I don't know if these guys were putting us on or not.' "

More here.

Reason's own answer to Ron Galella, Tim Cavanaugh, debunked "the myth of the stalkerazzi" in the Los Angeles Times and pointed out that "contemporary celebrities have already reneged on every other part of fame's social contract" at Hit & Run. So they should just shut the hell up and smile, smile, smile already.

And a few years back, after watching Tonya Harding pound Paula Jones in an episode of Fox's celebrity boxing show and musing over Lou Ferrigno vs. Robert Conrad and other modern-day gladiators who participated the old Battle of the Network Stars shows, I was moved to quote What Price Fame? author (and regular presence in these pages) Tyler Cowen's observation that:

"Contemporary stars are well-paid but impotent puppets….These market-based heroes are truly meritorious in one essential way: The serve their fans rather than making their fans serve them."

Literally. If you want to get a live phone call from a Z-list celeb--the likes of Lou F., former heavyweight champeens of the world Larry Holmes and Leon Spinks, Russell Johnson (you loved him as the Professor on Gilligan's Island), Marta Kristen (you really loved her as Judy on Lost In Space) and many, many more--go here.