Be sure and stay for the closing-credits blooper reel!


CNN Pipeline subscribers will get a chance to relive 9/11 in all its horror Monday as the cablenet plans to stream a "real-time" replay of its coverage of the attacks. But these aught-one nostalgiacs will get an even more bracing blast from the past from the furrowed brow of Aaron Brown, the thought-tormented anchorman who rocketed to stardom on that fateful day, and subsequently retrorocketed his way back down to earth, where he's now in internal exile in the Copper State.

There's no better way to mark the day everything changed and yet stayed the same than by pouring out a malt liquor in honor of those instant 9/11 stars who ain't here. Who could have thought Ashleigh Banfield would survive the toxic duststorm of the collapsing Twin Towers only to be brought low by an ill-conceived bus tour across these United States? We would have like to have known you, inadvertant spam king Mir Tamim Ansary, but we were just kids. Singing cop Daniel Rodriguez, we hardly knew ye! Who dares to speak of Dr. Mark Heath, and the reality show somebody should have given him? Kings, counsellors, actual heroes, pretend heroes, careerists on the make, ordinary citizens… They are all equal now, proof that nothing is more forgettable than the the admonition, "Never Forget."

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  1. I have no urge to relive that day.

    Last night, one of the local TV stations showed a picture of one of the people who jumped. It kept me up most of the night, just as the images from the real event did for the 3 nights following.

    I wish I COULD forget.

  2. Holy fucking Christ, I thought we’d never stop hearing about the Ashleigh Banfield “credibility glasses”. What the hell happened on that bus tour?

  3. Holy fucking Christ, I thought we’d never stop hearing about the Ashleigh Banfield “credibility glasses”

    I must have slept through that one. No recollection of her at all.

  4. Grizzly: Maybe you don’t remember the name, but perhaps you rememeber her as the journalist who went to Afghanistan only after dying (or rather re-dying, it seemed to me) her hair brown.

  5. That’s rich. Ashleigh Banfield has her own Website . . . but it hasn’t been updated (or visited?) since April 2005!

    Where are they now?

  6. The best thing about that day was that I had sex with my now ex-girlfriend first thing in the morning, before we got out of bed and turned on the TV. Lucky for me; you wanna talk about plummeting libido, sheesh.

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