Saddam: Shoot Me Later

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From Forbes, re: the trial of Saddam Hussein:

He asked the court to execute him by firing squad–"not by hanging as a common criminal"–if it convicts him of all charges and sentences him to death.

"I ask you being an Iraqi person that if you reach a verdict of death, execution, remember that I am a military man and should be killed by firing squad," he said.

More here. As an opponent of capital punishment, I've gotta say that characters such as Saddam test that position in me.

NEXT: Eliot Spitzer: Pothead

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  1. Nick Gillespie, I’m with you.

    How about a new libertarian position on the death penalty?

    NOW ONLY FOR POLITICIANS

  2. c,

    A firing squad is much too good for American politicians. Repeated rape at the hands of a syphilitic elephant sounds better to me.

  3. I wonder if put to a vote, would Iraqis prefer to have Saddam back over their current situation?

  4. Y’know, this was G?ering’s exact position during in Nuremberg. One reason the fat bastard committed suicide was that he wasn’t getting the firing squad he thought he deserved.

  5. You know, I read about Hussein’s death preferences this morning (why not “Death by Caressing” is what I want to know), and I was reminded that this guy really was a serious baddie. Regardless of whether we should’ve invaded or not. I think his evilocity often gets lost in the arguments about the war.

    Now that I think about it, I’m surprised that he didn’t request death by the sword. What kind of Arab is he?

    Dan T., I doubt it. While we’re not doing a great job with the occupation, I think it takes some weird x-ray glasses to say we’ve instituted a reign of terror. On the other hand, I’m just about certain that the Iraqis would prefer a third option 🙂

  6. Dan T., I doubt it. While we’re not doing a great job with the occupation, I think it takes some weird x-ray glasses to say we’ve instituted a reign of terror. On the other hand, I’m just about certain that the Iraqis would prefer a third option 🙂

    I don?t think we?ve instituted a reign of terror either, but we have unleashed a civil war that Saddam was at least able to keep in check. I?ve read a number of accounts that suggest that Iraq is a more dangerous and less functional country now than it was under Saddam. Hopefully, this will improve, but at this point how optimistic can we be?

  7. PL,

    Just how bad could it have been when he was in power that Iraqis are better off now? It’s in a constant state of conflict, with the added threat of Islamic fanatics looking to turn it into the next Iran. Sure Saddam used brutal tactics, but I’d venture to say they were justified measures against keeping the crazies down. If you were a leader of a country where a 3rd of the population wants to take over and force a extreme right theocracy, how do you know you wouldn’t lob some mustard gas into one of their villages?

    It’d be too late to put him back into power, for sure, but kill the guy? Why don’t we just set him up in some country in south america?

  8. He could live in exile in Saudi Arabia. I hear Amin’s place is available. I wonder whether that sort of deal was suggested to him before the invasion? Step down and live in a nice apartment in Riyadh, with dancing girls and stuff. Though he might want to change the chef from the one Idi was using.

    As for the civil war in Iraq, while I deplore the loss of life and the instability there like any decent person, I also wonder whether this almost has to happen for a new balance to be found. Sometimes I think we should’ve swooped in, removed the Ba’athist regime, and swooped out. Leaving a letter behind saying that we expected a liberal government in place with a free market economy and no bad stuff. . .or we’d come back for another swooping. I’d prefer no swooping at all, but since we’re now in the swooping business, I think that that beats occupying Iraq and becoming an irritant in the body politic.

  9. On the other hand, I’m just about certain that the Iraqis would prefer a third option 🙂

    The third option (self-rule by a marginally decent semi-legitimate non-terrorist government) is what we are pushing the Iraqis toward as fast as they can shed their backward, primitive, tribal mindsets.

    By the evidence, though, the third option preferred by a fair number of Iraqis is a backward, primitive, tribal society. Where their particular group of barbarians is on top, of course.

  10. The third option (self-rule by a marginally decent semi-legitimate non-terrorist government) is what we are pushing the Iraqis toward as fast as they can shed their backward, primitive, tribal mindsets.

    By the evidence, though, the third option preferred by a fair number of Iraqis is a backward, primitive, tribal society. Where their particular group of barbarians is on top, of course.

    The problem seems to be that when to have a country with a number of distinct factions, to institute democracy basically means to many of them “your hated rival gets to have his way because there are more of them”.

    Barbarians or not, it’s not surprising that this idea isn’t going over too well.

  11. The fifth option is to give Iraq to Disney and make all of the citizens of Iraq employees of the Mouse. Although Disney is oppressive, it is orderly and neat. Iraq would become something like Singapore, except with rides and costumed characters (Muhammad Mouse will be a short-lived attempt to appeal to the locals). Some of the rides are–

    • It’s an Islam World
    • Mr. Kurd’s Wild Ride
    • Kick George Bush in the Testicles
    • Houris Mountain
    • Pirates of the Mediterranean
    • The Carousel of Regress
    • Hall of Emirs
    • Haunted Ziggurat
    • And many, many more!
  12. Smoking a cigarette before they blow you away is the coolest part of a firing squad…so you can stare ruefully into the sky like Robert Vaughn in “Bridge at Remagen.”

  13. Excerpt from a news story I blogged about a couple of nights ago:

    U.S. commanders in Baghdad are focused on cracking down on Iraqi death squads responsible for killing hundreds of citizens in the capital in recent months, a military spokesman said Monday.

    At least we’re cracking down on the death squads, but I wonder how many Iraqis feel such things never should have been allowed to come into existence in the first place? I’ll bet the relatives of the dead fall into that group.

    Lest any patriots get huffy, I hasten to add that I am not claiming there are death squads terrorizing the people of Baghdad; the U.S. military is. So if you want to yell at anyone for casting slurs on our Glorious War Effort, go tell it to the Marines. Or the Army.

  14. How many Death Squads are needed to form a Death Platoon?

  15. I’ve thought of a cool name for a boy band.

    The Deaf Squad.

    Mind you, not to sure I’d want to hear them sing. Probably wouldn’t be too hot on the harmonies.

    My opinion:

    They should kill Saddam. He deserves it.

    The death penaltly is wrong 99% of the time. But every now and then it’s right. Like sex with an ugly bird.

  16. I’ve thought of a cool name for a boy band.

    The Deaf Squad.

    Or a rap group called The Def Squad.

  17. Three to five, depending on the Death Army… that’s pretty much the universal span of command at every level above the squad (Death Company, Death Battalion, Death Brigade, Death Division and Death Corps.)

  18. Or a rap group called The Def Squad.

    or the US version, the Debt Squad.

  19. Well, he may have worn lots of uniforms, but Saddam certainly isn’t a military man. He was the only non-military member of the original Baathist government back in the 1970s.

    I don’t think he’s ever held any military rank (except, presumably, various Commander-in-Chief ex officio type appointments) – as far as I know, he didn’t even get drafted, Iraq not having a draft when he was a young man, so he’s never actually served a day in uniform.

  20. Kick George Bush in the Testicles

    Considering how shitty of a day I’ve been having, I needed that laugh. Thanks.

  21. I’ve thought of a cool name for a boy band.

    You and ten million other non-musicians. One of these days an inventer of a “cool” name for a band will learn to play an instrument or two and actually form one.

    Not that this has anything to do with Saddam’s execution…
    Ooh! Saddam’s Execution!
    Great name for a band!

  22. Dan T:
    I dont think we have instituted a reign of terror either, but we have unleashed a civil war that Saddam was at least able to keep in check.

    True, and under Benito Mossolini the trains ran on time.

  23. PL

    You forgot to mention the food outlet:

    Poison Gastronomie

  24. ed,
    everybody knows that you have to get a cool name before you learn to play. Wild Stallions!!!

  25. Aresen,

    Ah, yes, isn’t that located at Fort Muslimness?

    Hey, kids! I’m going to be first in line for the Babylonian Bear Jamboree.

  26. I don’t think we’ve instituted a reign of terror either, but we have unleashed a civil war that Lord Vader and his Death Star was at least able to keep in check. I’ve read a number of accounts that suggest that the galaxy is a more dangerous and less functional place now than it was under the Emperor. Hopefully, this will improve, but at this point how optimistic can we be?

  27. Rebel scum.

  28. Hey, Nick – would seppuku be acceptable?

  29. If Saddam wants the death he deserves, I say he’s calling for the industrial plastic shredder.

  30. Saddam was a sadistic monstor but the best that Iraq could hope for. Let the Kurds have their Kurdistan and find a new Saddam or at least a Mubarak for the rest of Iraq. I don’t know how you get away with it after all this democracy and freedom talk though.

    The stupidity of this war has only been surpassed by the incompetence in waging it.

  31. Man, you need to get on one of those Disney rides for a while. Take a load off.

  32. How about a nice game of Mohammed the Conquerer? I get this gun and you get that one. We each get 40k rounds of ammo, and we each get five IEDs to set where ever we like. Suicide bombers are trump.

    This ought to be a sell-out.

  33. Band namers: Are you unaware of those 1970s art/punk/new wavers, Liverpool’s Deaf School?

    I’m anti-death penalty myself, but the Iraqis could always choose “Death by Bongo!”

    Kevin

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