King of Pain

Rep. Steve King (R-IA), last seen comparing Baghdad's death rate favorably to Washington, DC, is applying his homespun wisdom to our situation on the Mexican border. Here's King discussing the Patrick J. Buchanan Memorial Border Wall*.

"I also say we need to do a few other things on top of that wall, and one of them being to put a little bit of wire on top here to provide a disincentive for people to climb over the top. We could also electrify this wire with the kind of current that would not kill somebody, but it would be a discouragement for them to be fooling around with it. We do that with livestock all the time."

King also suggested that if Mexican immigrants successfully apply for American citizenship, they should be rewarded with a "wet, soft kiss, square on the lips. Like my Daddy used to give me."**

*not the actual name, but I'm nominating it.
**he didn't actually say this.

Comments

[kevrob]

Y'know, for something to be a Memorial, its namesake has to be...uh...dead.

Does Dave know something about Patty-Patty Buch-Buch's health that we don't?

Kevin

[ChicagoTom]

If they electrify the fence and add barbed wire, they should just film it and make it a reality show and give whoever can make it over the "Patrick J. Buchanan Memorial Border Wall of Death" gets citizenship (didn't some show in mexico already do that??)

[David Weigel]

ChicagoTom - If you want to go that far, I suggest it be dubbed the "Richard and Linda Thompson Memorial Wall of Death."

[Evan!]

"We do that with livestock all the time."

Conflating Brown People with cattle stocks. Real classy, fucker.

[mediageek]

Anybody remember the congressman in the movie version of "Coneheads" who wanted to put collars on illegals similar to those invisble fence things you get for a dog?

I thought that was kinda funny back then.

[Jon H]

"Y'know, for something to be a Memorial, its namesake has to be...uh...dead."

That's September 10th thinking. 9/11 changed everything.

[Clean Hands]

Can we maybe instead build a wall around the Capital buiding, so that goatfuckers like this can't get out and mingle with decent folk?

[Postmodern Sleaze]

kev:

Well, Pat Buchanan's live status can easily be changed. I'd be happy to do the honors, for the price of a plane ticket, hotel room, a proper sniper rifle and a sufficient judicial bribe.

[mediageek]

Prediction:

Postmodern Sleaze will shortly cease to post here, and we'll all wonder what happened to him.

"Anybody heard from Postmodern Sleaze lately?"

"No."

"Who?"

"I heard he passed out at 31 flavors and had to be rushed to the hospital."

[spur]

Even if he didn't mean it, the congresscritter has a point on the murder rate in DC. I'm not sure what its been recently, but IIRC from 1990-2000 DC had 3300 odd murders, on par with the total murders in 30 years of political violence in Northern Ireland -- sadly we as a nation paid more attention and spend a lot more political capital to those whitetrash in another country than we did black folks getting killed within a couple miles of the capital due directly to government policy and neglect.

However, if the press is to be believed - Baghdad is losing 3000 people at a conservative rate of every 6 months or so, and probably a lot faster -- so he's way off on that one.

[APL]

We do that with livestock all the time

Next, he'll advocate transporting them in cattle cars.

[jack johnstone]

livestock and wet kisses..interesting things on this man's mind.

[Sphynx]

Mediageek: In Coneheads (1993), that was Michael McKean playing the role of Gorman Seedling, INS Deputy Comissioner who proposed the collars. David Spade played the syncofantic assistant Eli Turnbull Coneheads (1993) at IMDB.com

[The Wine Commonsewer]

...comparing Baghdad's death rate favorably to Washington DC....

Well, since were 25% more likely to be shot and killed in DC than in Iraq I propose that we immediately pull out of Washington DC.

[Pro Libertate]

In the middle of the wall, we should build Thunderdrome. Two illegal immigrants go in, one legal immigrant comes out. That's the law.

[Clean Hands]

Better yet, let's turn the Capital into the Thunderdrome - two senators go in, one comes out.

Repeat.

When you're down to McCain vs. Hillary, the American people have won, regardless of how that particular one comes out.

[Clean Hands]

Then we can pull out of Washington. Until then, it's still in the hands of an enemy too dangerous to turn our backs on.

[s.m. koppelman]

...If you want to go that far, I suggest it be dubbed the "Richard and Linda Thompson Memorial Wall of Death."

Damn you, Weigel. The moment I read that, I pictured a scene in a Broadway musical about plucky would-be immigrants, set on the border. Our Hero takes a long, hard look at the electrified fence and finally says to a skeptical companion

"This is the nearest to being alive. Let me take my chances on the Wall of Death."

At which point the orchestra starts up and everyone bursts into song.

[violent_k]

As far as dealing with congress goes, I found this at http://www.gunsanddope.com/

First order of business on assuming office:
Fire 33% of the Congress [names selected at random]
and replace them with full-grown adult ostritches,
whose mysterious and awesome dignity will
elevate the suidaen barbarity long established there.