…And then there's the Fourth Commandment, the one about robots not harming human beings, right?

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Rep. Lynn Westmoreland (R—GA) has a very personal reason for co-sponsoring a bill that would require the Ten Commandments to be displayed in both houses of the U.S. Congress: He needs help remembering more than three of them.

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  1. LOL!! Well, this is evidence that his motivation is political pandering rather than sincere belief.

  2. “All of em. You want me to name em all”

    That is so funny!!

  3. And then there’s the Fourth Commandment, the one about robots not harming human beings, right

    If you’re using the Catholic numbering system, some parents would agree with you on that one.

  4. Which brings up another question — which ten commandments would be displayed, since different traditions within the Judeo-Christian tradition divide them up differently. The Catholic system combines the Protestant 1st and 2nd commandments into one, and the Protestant system combines the Catholic 9th and 10th into one.

  5. Well let’s see he’s in Congress so you know he doesn’t know “Thou Shalt Not Steal.”

    I’m sure he’s forgotten about bearing false witness.

    The question is does he have a problem with coveting his neighbor’s wife or man servant?

  6. The Three Laws of American Politics:

    1. A politician must never jeopardize his chances of reelection or election to a higher office, or by inaction allow those chances to be jeopardized.

    2. A politician must follow the wishes of his campaign contributors, while paying lip service to the wishes of his constituents, so long as this does not conflict with the First Law.

    3. A politician must protect and defend the Constitution, so long as such protection and defense does not conflict with the First or Second Laws.

  7. Not to mention the Jewish tradition, which considers them just another fourteen or so out of the over six hundred in the Torah.

  8. I can rattle them right off the top of my head – and I’m an atheist!

  9. Before watching the video, I thought the punch line was going to be that he’s under indictment for theft, adultery, and perjury.

    Hey, he’s a member of Congress. It was a reasonable guess.

  10. OT, thoreau, I take it I’m not invited to your July 1 get-together? Even if I promise to leave Unborn Angel in his womb at home?

  11. I covet you to be my man servant, Macklin.

  12. crimethink-

    Of course you’re welcome!

    I’m not the one planning it, so I didn’t send out any invites. This one is linguist’s doing. Blame her for not advertising it widely enough.

    For those who don’t know, there is a Hit and Run gathering in DC on the evening of Saturday, July 1.

    From her post on grylliade:

    Who: Grylliaders, H&R friends, friends of friends, S.O.s
    What: food, drink, conversation…maybe some chair throwing?
    Where: Lucky Bar, 1221 Connecticut Ave. NW ( Transportation Metro: Dupont Circle or Farragut North) Phone 202/331-3733
    When: around 7 p.m., July 1

  13. Remember this classic?

    *The Three Laws of Libertarian Robotics:

    1. A libertarian robot may not try to win an election, or through inaction, allow an election to be won by it.

    2. A libertarian robot must follow any principles laid out in The Fountainhead, Atlas Shrugged, or Libertarianism in One Lesson, except where such principles conflict with the First Law.

    3. A libertarian robot must protect its own drug stash, prostitution ring, and ferret farm as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.

    Comment by: zirakzigil at January 31, 2006 10:51 AM

    It seemed apropos as November draws near.

  14. On the flip side I did like this….

    Colbert: You have not introduced a single piece of legislation since you entered Congress.

    Westmoreland: That’s correct.

    Colbert: This has been called a do nothing Congress. Is it safe to say you’re the do nothingest?

    Westmoreland: I, I, ..Well there’s one other do nothiner. I don’t know who that is, but they’re a Democrat.

    Colbert: What can we get rid of to balance the budget?

    Westmoreland: The Dept. of Education.

  15. Well, to be fair, he does want to post them on the walls of Congress. Perhaps he, personally, needs a constant reminder.

  16. Note to Politicians: Don’t have any public opinions on the Bible, especially public opinions that you intend to be enshrined in law, if you don’t read the book first.

  17. I don’t blame anyone for not making in through that 2000 page sleeping pill. But if you’re going to say it’s literally true and the government should enact laws based on it you should have a someone type up a bullet point summary or flash cards or something for you. Maybe they have an audio version by now.

  18. Hey, I thought the dude was a toolbag, but do-nothingest congress, and getting rid of the dept of education give him cool points.

  19. I thought the punch line was going to be that he’s under indictment for theft, adultery, and perjury.

    But it doesn’t mean he isn’t headed that way. Consider political corruption to have normalized eigenfunctions with politicians acting as eigenvectors. Now integrating over all legislation… odd, even, dirac delta, yada, yada and the probility density over congressional tenure goes to 1.

  20. Speaking of eigenfunctions:
    What are the eigenvectors of the human body?

  21. Perhaps he should go with “Ape shall not kill ape.” It’s easier to remember.

  22. kwais:

    …getting rid of the dept of education give him cool points.

    For sure!

  23. What are the eigenvectors of the human body?

    I asked a girl if I could put my eigenvector in her Hilbert space, but she told me that what I was asking wasn’t orthonormal. There’s a bra joke in there somewhere, but I’m afraid you wouldn’t ket it.

  24. Well, that’s cetainly not an answer I .

  25. …….expected!

  26. Yeah, it’s pretty Focked up.

  27. Yep, downright degenerate.

  28. That’s your spin on it. But we should stop before we Bohr everyone else.

  29. That was random.

  30. Well, d’accord…that Aspect of this exchange I hadn’t considered.

  31. That’s ok, just Pauli yourself up.

  32. Clearly this man was not given a candy bar each time he memorized a commandment.

    Not that I know anyone that did that… *ahem*

    Good thing he didn’t go catechismic on his ass. Just the commandments themselves? Pshaw, that’s sissy stuff.

  33. I’m thinking he’s probably more than a little shaky on the Nicene creed. he probably subscribes to the arian heresy or something without even knowing it!!!oooh, or maybe he’s a pelagian; those guys really get on my nerves.
    —a concerned atheist.

  34. Well, this is evidence that his motivation is political pandering rather than sincere belief.

    What has me worried is the people he’s pandering too. We’re involved in a wastefu war overseas where enemy POWs are being sexually tortured and civilians slaughterd by our troops, we’re spending like drunken sailors, the NSA is tapping our phones, and THIS (along with gay marriage and flag burning) is what the Republican base expects the representatives they sent to government to do for them?

    This country is so fucking screwed.

  35. Only at H&R could a political discussion morph into a matrix algebra chat room. There is just no determinant for where the conversation is going to head.

    Shit, now I’m doing it!

  36. Only at H&R could a political discussion morph into a matrix algebra chat room

    “We call that ‘The Dennis Miller Ratio.'”- Professor Frink

  37. This is simply the direct product our intelligence and our pathetic geekiness.

  38. In the Matrix, I know Algebra.

  39. For the last time, no, you don’t!

  40. In Soviet Russia, algebra knows you!

  41. It would be really funny if they passed this law requiring the posting of the ten commandments, and the sculptor put the wrong commandments up, and nobody in Congress noticed.

    THE TEN COMMANDMENTS
    1. Don’t murder.
    2. Don’t lie.
    3. Don’t steal.
    4. Don’t pick your nose in church.
    5. Don’t listen to rap music.
    6. Eat all your vegetables.
    7. Brush your teeth after every meal.
    8. No whacking off.
    9. Don’t use cuss words.
    10. Make sure church services end in time for Dad to catch the big game on TV.

  42. Fourier information,
    Geek thread transformation happens all over Laplace at Hit and Run.

  43. This is simply the direct product…
    But is it Abelian?

  44. This was just a flat-out takedown by Stephen Colbert. He asks Westmoreland which programs he would cut, and Lynn says “Department of Education.” Big chuckle from audience. “What else whould you cut Congressman?” asks Colbert. Westmoreland can’t think of any others and so Stephen prompts him by saying Social…” and trying to get him to finish it.

    “Security?” says Westmoreland.

    “So you’d like to cut Social Security?” Colbert asks.

    “No I don’t want to cut Social Security.”

    “So you’d like to take back some of the things you’ve said.”

    That’s perhaps a little bit worse even than what Jon Stewart did to Bill Bennett.

    But definitely not worse than how Jon dogged Ken Mehlman.

  45. belle,

    Remember that homoousionism was declared heretical long before it was declared doctrinal. And that it was declared heretical again by the next several ecumenical councils after Nicaea … (Antioch, Sirmium, et al.)

  46. OT: My nominee for The Worst Abuse of Statistics Ever, along with an award for their enabler, The Stupidest Reporter of All Time.

    http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20060618/ap_on_re_us/motorcycle_helmets

  47. This is off topic but when I got to work today, this cartoon was on the desktop:
    http://www.minutemanmedia.org/CARTOON%20052406%20FULL%20SIZE.htm

    I just thought you guys would get a laugh out of it.

  48. Wow, nice work regurgitating The Colbert Report – a COMEDY show.

  49. Geek thread transformation happens all over Laplace at Hit and Run.

    It’s derivative of how integral we are to the local group.

  50. No, the group as a whole is merely asymptotically approaching “absolute funniness.” 🙂

    “Ape shall not kill ape.”

  51. I think we better wave our right to continue this particle’ar line of discussion before someone goes nonlinear.

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