More Wit and Wisdom From Senator James Inhofe

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There is more to Sen. James Inhofe (R-Okla.) than intimate knowledge of his entire family's sexual history. According to an unofficial transcript from the congressional record, he supports a federal marriage amendment because he's just wild about small government:

Now, stop and think. What's going to be the results of this? The results are going to be that it's going to be a very expensive thing, all these kids, many of them are going to be ending up on welfare. So it goes far beyond just the current emotionals [sic]. I think that my colleague, Senator Sessions, said I believe yesterday, 'If there are not families to raise children, who will raise them? Who will do the responsibility? It will fall on the state.' Clearly it will be a state.

Got that? When same-sex marriage destroys the family (still waiting for an explanation on that one), unclaimed children will roam the streets like packs of dogs. (Is Big Orphanage behind the radical homosexual agenda?) Don't say you weren't warned.

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  1. I cornholed Sen. Inhofe and his youngest son. But it was off the record, so it doesn’t count.

  2. I watched.

  3. What in the hell is this guy talking about? What kids? Gay people don’t generally procreate without outside assistance. Or is he suggesting that allowing gays to get married will cause otherwise stable hetero marriages to disintigrate and the parents to abondon their offspring?

  4. So… we’ve had the hullabaloo about the eeeevil Mexican illegal immigrants, and now the kerfuffle about the eeeevil gay people wanting to get married.

    What other red meat is there to toss to the Taliban wing of the GOP?

  5. Heh. I know how to make their heads explode: show them a picture of two Mexican men getting married, and burning a US flag to consecrate the ceremony.

    Blooey!

  6. I got people on the left telling me I’m a racist facist backwardass and probably murderously violent redneck jihadist because I live in Texas, own guns and attend church (they’re my husband’s guns, actually, but I am not afraid of them and I don’t mind having them in the house, so I’m just as evil as he is). Now I got people on the right telling me that if my gay friends marry each other (only a few sets of my gay friends want to marry each other, actually – the rest are sluts), I’m going to get a divorce and abandon my child. I’m evil, and I’m at the mercy of inexplicable social forces. I had no idea.

    And does he really have 20 kids????

  7. kind of off topic…

    Did anyone else see Jon Stewart’s interview with Bill Bennet about gay marriage? (Links to a .mov file)

    I thought it was a pretty good grilling

  8. It is obvious to anyone that is not a liberal that allowing gay marriage would leave my kids no choice but to raise themselves in a household with no parents and deal with the difficult task of finding a job that has not been stolen by the Spanish speaking illegal immigrants resulting in a lot more kids collecting welfare. Gay marriage is just another tool that the liberals want to use to increase the size of the welfare state and taxes on God fearing Americans. Once the gays get married, there is nothing to stop every pigeon in the US from standing up and demanding their rights also. Think about it, same sex marriage will eventually lead to pigeons collecting welfare and America cannot support a whole country full of pigeons.

  9. I got people on the left telling me I’m a racist facist backwardass and probably murderously violent redneck jihadist because I live in Texas, own guns and attend church

    And I’ve got people on the right telling me I’m a commie liberal pinko because I live in New York City, don’t own guns, and don’t attend church. Ain’t sterotypes a bitch 🙂

  10. Scott,
    Well the obvious solution is to disband the welfare state and let every pigeon accept the ultimate responsibilty for his or her destiny. Some will succeed, others will become prey for cats. That is the free market at work.

  11. The results are going to be that it’s going to be a very expensive thing, all these kids, many of them are going to be ending up on welfare.

    Of course if the anti-gay folks would get the hell out of the way, significant numbers of gay partners would adopt unwanted kids, leading to a reduction in the number on welfare.

    Think about it, same sex marriage will eventually lead to pigeons collecting welfare…

    Maybe this is the key. Remind Congresscritters that once pigeons are dependant on the government teat we can make them stop crapping all over politicians’ statues.

  12. stubby: kids and grandkids together total 20

  13. Stubby:

    1. In Texas, as a “community property” state, the guns are half yours anyway, so you own them as much as he does!

    2. Remember, “The guns made me do it. The guns made me do it.

  14. We should demand that the Republicans put an end to the Quickie Marriage Industry. Shut down the Vegas chapels and those damned Unitarian churches.
    And while we’re at it, no engaged couples can register at Target. They support gays.
    Since bands that play at receptions usually have at least one gay member (it tends to be the keyboard player), we better ban them as well.

    Fortunately Dress Makers, Wedding Planners, Banquet Hall Managers, Florists and Caterers are almost universally straight…

  15. But when Sen. Inhofe calls the science behind global warming “the greatest hoax in the history of mankind,” we should take him seriously, because he’s so knowledgeable and insightful.

  16. joe,

    I Googled inhofe and reason.com and could only find one reference to Sen Inhofe and global warming that came close to saying we should take him seriously (from a Bailey article from 2003)

    Senator James Inhofe (R-Okla.) has called global warming a “hoax” perpetrated by extreme environmentalists. Of course, Inhofe is from a big oil-producing state and is derided by activists as a know-nothing yahoo, but perhaps he’s on to something.

    Other than that, it is mainly you bringing him up and everyone else ignoring you.

  17. I like it. It’s a backdoor way to try and reel in the true conservatives and libertarians. He gets a 93 for creativity.

  18. In Genesis 2:24, they said, ‘Therefore man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become flesh.’

    Oh yeah. Well Genesis also said, “She seems to have an invisible touch yeah, she reaches in and grabs right hold of your heart, she seems to have an invisible touch yeah, it takes control and slowly tears you apart.”

    I can assure you that my kids and grandkids are very proud and very thankful that my wife and I also believed in the later words of Phil Collins who said, “Well, I was there and I saw what you did, I saw it with my own two eyes, so you can wipe off the grin, I know where you’ve been, Its all been a pack of lies.”

    Amen

  19. Sen. Inhofe, if you’re not gay, why do you keep fucking me?

    …seriously, I’ve stopped referring to the two Senators of Oklahoma as “my” Senators because my vote really doesn’t matter. And I sure as hell didn’t vote for them.

  20. a picture of two Mexican men getting married, and burning a US flag to consecrate the ceremony.

    Ohhh, can’t stop laughing. Wheeze. Ow.

  21. Hold on a second James! Packs of unclaimed gaylings roaming the streets are a perfect source of cheap labor. And when they wear out we can mulch their heathen corpses into fuel. So gay marriage could end our dependence on Mexicans and Iranians at the same time! Maybe we should reconsider our position…

  22. a picture of two Mexican men getting married, and burning a US flag to consecrate the ceremony.

    *falling on floor laughing*

  23. Gimme Back My Dog,

    Stop picking on joe. 🙂

  24. Let me get this staight:

    Gays can marry = dissolution of marriage in general = lots of kids on the dole.

    Solution: Gays, who as couples tend to have higher incomes and cleaner kitchens, adopt all the poor wee urchins and America is all the better for it.

  25. [H]e supports a federal marriage amendment because he’s just wild about small government. We could have a much smaller government if we just went with despotism and had one person tell us all what to do. There would be lots of police, but pretty much the rest of government spending could be eliminated.

  26. Number 6,
    I got on this thread to say what you said.

    What the Senator said makes no sense at all. Fortunately, we can handle that too here on H&R.

  27. I remember a couple of years ago when people actually came to this very forum to persuade us that teh gay marriage would destroy society.

    Now we all laugh at it.

    I guess some things have in fact improved on this forum.

  28. Gimme Back My Dog,

    Stupid is as stupid does.

  29. Every time some blow-dried politico twerp tells me to, “Stop and think…” I want to go out and commit acts of violence on random passerby.

  30. The logic of this guy is worthy of The Underpants Gnomes:

    Step 1: Gay Marriage

    Step 2: ???

    Step 3: Kids on Welfare

  31. thoreau,
    This forum? Really? There’s always been a few right wingers hanging around. I can remember some hardline defenders of right to life. But ‘gay marriage = the end days’? around here? Don’t suppose you could dig up a link.

  32. Warren-

    There was a lot of talk about “undermining the traditional procreative model of marriage” and that sort of crap.

    Come to think of it, much of that came from Andrew.

    I’ll look through the archives and get back to you.

  33. I recall a great quote about James Inhofe.

    “James Inhofe could well be the dumbest man in the United States Senate. Then again, he might not even be the dumbest man in the United States Senate from Oklahoma.”

  34. 1. In Texas, as a “community property” state, the guns are half yours anyway, so you own them as much as he does!

    [quietly] Not unless he bought them after you were married; even then, if they were given to or acquired by him, he retains the ability to manage the property. [/that’s all]

  35. I live next door to a nice gay couple. One of them in fact inherited the house from his deceased (not AIDS, by the way) first husband. In an appropriately cliche way, they have the best lawn on the street. We’ve lived next door for seven years without either of us catching the gay thing and running off with someone else. I will listen if anyone can explain to me any good reason to deny these two people the legal status Steve and I have, I’ll be happy to listen. I do insist that it be a good reason, and not just “gays are icky.” Since I don’t see how that’s possible, I’m not going to rearrange my schedule and wait.

  36. At one time we had a few commenters here who were all for banning gay marraige, etc.

  37. At one time we had a few commenters here who were all for banning gay marraige, etc.

    Yup, I remember one of them who kept claiming that marriage was a “brand name” held by hetrosexual copuples.

  38. Edit: couples.

  39. I kinda like ‘copuples’.

    They want to ban gay marriage so they won’t be tempted by their very secret desires.

  40. Uncle Sam,
    You hit the nail on the head…

  41. one time we had a few commenters here who were all for banning gay marraige, etc.

    Wasn’t the name something like “billy ray”?

  42. *sarcasm alert*

    Doncha know, there are millions of married men — married men with children — who want to do these disgusting things? But they haven’t. And why? Because they couldn’t get married to another man. Allow gay marriage and the floodgates will be opened. Tens of millions of married men will leave their families, go to gay bars, spend their weekends at Ikea instead of Home Depot like God intended. It will be the end of the family as we know it!

    *end sarcasm*

  43. But when Sen. Inhofe calls the science behind global warming “the greatest hoax in the history of mankind,” we should take him seriously, because he’s so knowledgeable and insightful.

    joe, almost everyone is right about some things and wrong about others. Even stupid people.

    And sometimes being right might be nothing more than a lucky guess.

    But since this thread is about Inhofe’s ideas about gay marriage his opinions about GW (or the color of the sky: ie something he has a chance of actually getting right, for that matter) are irrelevant.

  44. Karen:

    I used to live next to a gay couple that, in an appropriately cliched way, had the most tasefully decorated house imaginable. My wife and I went to a Christmas party at their place and she fretted for hours over what to wear. I asked her why and she said “Duh–I’m gonna be surrounded by gay men!”

  45. Kevin: I was just thinking about my spouse, wardrobe and gays, to wit: even if my husband did have secret urges, it wouldn’t matter cos the way he dresses, ain’t no gay guy ever gonna pick him up. I have seen gay men stand transfixed in horror as they stare at my hubby’s footwear. And then they look at me, as if to say “Girlfriend…?”

  46. My wife keeps threatening to nominate me for Queer Eye for the Straight Guy but I just tell her they’ll have to work around my concealed handgun.

  47. Don — There’s a lot of general repulsion at the thought of gay male physical activities, but I think a little-mentioned but oft-thought-of aspect people’s fear of family breakdown has to do with women. Lots of people see men as essentially irresponsible and not so tightly bound, in some senses, to “the family.” People are more horrified, I think, at the idea that women would abandon their children.

    (I have 3 comments composed on different threads but I can’t get any of them to post!)

  48. Don — There’s a lot of general repulsion at the thought of gay male physical activities, but I think a little-mentioned but oft-thought-of aspect people’s fear of family breakdown has to do with women. Lots of people see men as essentially irresponsible and not so tightly bound, in some senses, to “the family.” People are more horrified, I think, at the idea that women would abandon their children.

    (I have 3 comments composed on different threads but I can’t get any of them to post!)

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