If You Can't Fight 'Em, Subsidize 'Em

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University of Colorado Police have posted 150 pictures of students "inhaling, exhaling, and streaking" in a field on 4/20. (The heartwarming "photo album" is here.) They're offering $50 a pop to students who will turn in their friends, and undergrads are lining up to snitch. One coed attempts to make sense of it all:

Hansen said she was surprised to hear that hundreds of people had responded to the police department's reward offer.

"But $50 is a sack," she said, referring to the price of marijuana. "So there's your incentive."

NEXT: The Beast That Will Not Die!

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  1. Hey whatever it takes. The nerve of these people, getting high on a spring day where the children can see. They’re a threat to civilization itself. They should all receive life-sentences.

  2. I’ve yet to see a campus security force that wasn’t a bunch of bitter rent-a-cops.

    But the real bad guys are the kids who ratted out their peers. They themselves should be identified, and have their asses kicked at the next game. On video.

  3. The organizers of the smoke-in should have gotten some CU footballers involved. That way the administration would have just turned its head and pretended nothing happened.

  4. The organizers of the smoke-in should have gotten some CU footballers involved. That way the administration would have just turned its head and pretended nothing happened.

  5. Mike in FTW, excellent point.

    Isn’t there something in the law that says you have to be 1) observed in the act or 2) there must be sufficient evidence that you committed said crime in order to be prosecuted?

    Now, I know these people were caught smoking on tape, but does the tape definitely show WHAT they were smoking? I have smoked tobacco rolled up in EZ Widers before, as well as stuffed into a hand-blown glass pipe with a faucet screen subbed to stop the tobacco from ashing my tongue. From these pictures, you cannot definitively say that they were smoking Marijuana.

  6. AmyLou – a university doesn’t really have to PROVE anything to punish you; they can just boot you out of school for violating thier rules… also, if they want to press criminal charges, all the cops have to do is to convince a jury that you were smoking MJ. I’m pretty sure it would be easy to get a jury to go along with the notion that it really was pot you were smoking on video at a 4/20 celebration…

  7. Unfortunately no one fears snitching on pot smokers and streakers:

    “I dunno man, we really should break the legs of the snitches, but, it just seems, so, you know, uncool and violent”

  8. so much for reasonable doubt…

    I’ve wondered for many, many years exactly what it is that “authorities” no matter what form they come in, have against MJ.

  9. I just called the UC Boulder cops and told them that #023 looks like Jason Hanson. I forgot to mention that Jason is now 50 years old and lives in Virginia, but I’m sure they’ll eventually figure that out.

    Now if a few thousand more people do their civic duty and call in anyone they recognize, I’m sure the UC Boulder police will appreciate all the help.

  10. These comments are about what I expected from a bunch of drugged out potheads.

    You so called Libertarians are pathetic.

  11. The beauty of the market at work. And people say we couldn’t possibly deport 11 million illegals.

  12. good one, john.

    (unless you’re serious, in which case i can only put on a copy of “songs of the humpback whales” and try to pretend you don’t exist.)

  13. Sounds like a great idea! These folks turning in their friends and relatives are heros, this way they can get SEVERE punishment which is the help they need for there serious moral lapses and crimes against all humanity by being on the drug.

    We should deport them to Iraq. That is where they belong because the dope users are the enemy of freedom. Sounds like a great idea! This way the worst criminals out there can be gotten rid of. Maybe we could export them to make some money for inforcement by selling them as slaves. We also need a law that makes it illegal for a jury to find anyone accused of any of these crimes innocent. That could be a usefull tool in the WOD. Another good idea was a proposed “smoke a joint lose a limb” legislation to impose severe penalties on users.

  14. We don also gots to have a laww wherein it is written that you get death if you are suspected of ever using the drug.

  15. ATTN: Coloradans

    My sources in the University of Colorado Police Department tell me that the lady answering the phone is taking notes from everyone who calls in, at (303)492-8168. I also hear she’s a very nice lady and might even be sympathetic to the ridiculousness of this.

    The police are claiming they are enforcing “trespassing” laws; they are not busting anyone for drugs.

    Rumor also has it that this is the result of pressure from the state Legislature, not because the University Police were eager to do it. Call your legislators, and remind them that they’re still assholes. Or thank them if they’re not.

    And ask them to legalize pot while you’re at it.

  16. image 50 appears to be me circa 1988. I can’t believe that someone turned in the me of 18 years ago! Bastards!

  17. Hey Mike in ftw:

    Since none of the CU “footballers” were ever charged with a crime in the media feeding frenzy of the past several years, you tell me what happened. Please cite facts and not hearsay with your answer.

  18. bp – i think the simple point is that universities, like any large institution, tend to be more favorably inclined to overlook the transgressions of some groups of students than others. especially those which generate revenue and/or avoid bad press.

  19. These comments are about what I expected from a bunch of drugged out potheads.

    You so called Libertarians are pathetic.

    Comment by: JD at May 1, 2006 01:31 PM

    So, Troll, do you use alcohol, drink coffee, or smoke tobacco?

  20. Since none of the CU “footballers” were ever charged with a crime in the media feeding frenzy of the past several years,

    Thank you for proving Mike’s point.

  21. I was kidding DHex, but there is something really preversly funny about it. What is not funny is that the Boulder cops are so underemployed that they have nothing better to do than harras stupid college kids. My guess is that this whole thing involves hefty fines and nice revenue for the city of Boulder. Not that that would have anything to do with the selective enforcement of the law. No never.

  22. Yeah, I really think in a place like Boulder, most judges aren’t going to entertain prosecution based on photographic evidence of MJ smoking. Without even officer statements about the smell of MJ smoke, there’s no way a competant judge would allow the case to go forward.

    Based on the wording of the sign, it’s clear that they heard about the “smoke-in” event, closed the park, and then set the sting to catch everybody trespassing. The sign is pretty clearly worded and clearly lets everybody in the area know that they’ll be subject to prosecution. Probably in order to stave off any entrapment events, since it’s pretty clear the only reason they closed the park was to catch people breaking the trespassing law.

  23. krunkjuice:

    “The police are claiming they are enforcing “trespassing” laws; they are not busting anyone for drugs.”

    Which is obvious, given the fact that every single photograph is of someone in possession of, or in the act of smoking, something. Many of the photographs actually have little blow-ups of the supposedly illicit substance in question, so there can be no mistake that the evil bastards were doing drugs!

    But, yeah, it’s all about trespassing.

  24. “bp – i think the simple point is that universities, like any large institution, tend to be more favorably inclined to overlook the transgressions of some groups of students than others. especially those which generate revenue and/or avoid bad press.”

    Only that’s not what happened in the case of the CU football scandal, where the school fed the athletic department to a ravenous (and lazy) press corps, even though the alleged transgressions never even warranted a charge.

    As far as the 4/20 thing goes, since that event has been going on for years with constant chorus of “pot smokers openly flouting the law in our midst” from many townsfolk, I’m sure the cops felt pressure to show up and please area grouches.

  25. All the “snitches” are just the next influx of new politicians, policemen, and priests. Someone please make a web site with pictures of all the narcs.

  26. Evan, you’re sharp today!
    To be fair, though, one of the pictures is of a naked guy not smoking anything.

  27. If you like identify yourself can you still get the 50 bucks? If the fine is like, $100, it’s like getting even money that you can beat the rap. Plus, you get $50 in advance for y’know beer and snackage.

  28. Dude, four or five of those guys look just like me. I want my $200!

    Anyway, I told some of you it was a dumb idea to stoke the anti-Ward Churchill fires. I know it’s a big moral dilemma for libertarians when the state tries to persecute someone for being both offensive AND anti-capitalist. But congratulations: CU is going to be the state’s prize whipping boy for years to come.

    Next stop, intelligent design. And the much more popular Marley Corollary to ID: pot is so good that it must have been designed by a supernatural being.

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