White House Snow Job

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Via the fabtascular Sploid ("News with a Tabloid Mentality") comes word that Fox News' Tony Snow has indeed agreed to become the White House press pinata secretary:

Snow, who had recently battled colon cancer, was awaiting clearance from his doctors. He's expected to be introduced Wednesday morning as the next White House Press Secretary.

After years of being subjected to snivelling pawns, Snow may represent a pleasant change for the White House press corps. He's had a long career in both journalism and politics, with plenty of experience behind a typewriter and a microphone.

He started as a reporter in 1979, steadily rising through the ranks of punditry until Bush's father hired him as a speech writer in 1991.

More here.

Tim Cavanaugh's premonitions on the matter here.

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  1. I picture his first press Q&A session to be something akin to the SNL skit where the morning news show hosts revert to primitivism when the teleprompter goes out.
    “Make the words come back!”

  2. Jeff P.
    I’m all for that if he cannibalizes Helen Thomas first.

    Am I thinking of the right SNL skit?

  3. Good for him. Who needs integrity anyway?

  4. So, Faux News is now officially the farm league for the Bush Admin.

  5. “No president has looked this impotent this long.”

    Only because Bob Dole lost the ’96 election.

  6. ohshit, SR. hilarious.

    BobDole doesn’t think that’s funny. BobDole BobDole.

  7. SR (AKA The Ghost of Jay Leno’s Monologue):

    Bah duh dummmp, TSSSS!

    /ugh

  8. You want some funny? Here:

    “What the hell is this, some kinda tube?”

  9. Up next: Hannity named new Defense Secretary.

  10. Thank you, I’ll be here all week! And don’t forget to tip your server squirrel!

  11. SR:

    Now do one about how black people do something like this, but white people do it like that!

  12. To his credit, Snow has always actively denied the “liberal media bias” mantra that makes so many conservative commentors so tiresome. Other than that, the best I can say is he should be better on camera than the last guy, who always reminded me of the Sweaty Lawyer character that Martin Short used to play on SNL.

  13. It’s Weekend Update:

    Here now, the news:

    “The White House this week announced success of the world’s second complete face transplant.”

    Thank you, and have a pleasant tomorrow.

    I am outta here.

  14. Interesting. In the post above, I described the graphic behind the anchor in angle-brackets, and it totally disappeared. Anyway, pretend this is radio, and supply your own visuals. I think it’s pretty obvious how SNL would handle the script above. 🙂

  15. >BobDole doesn’t think that’s funny. BobDole
    >BobDole.

    As Bob Dole once said to Norm Macdonald on SNL, “That’s not even a good impression of Bob Dole. It’s an impression of Dan Akroyd doing an impression of Bob Dole.”

  16. File this appointment under Truth in Advertising and Appropriate Name for the Job.
    The Press Secretary’s primary purpose is to provide Snow jobs to the press corp.

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