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America's mayor, Oscar Goodman of Las Vegas, recently visited some 4th graders at Mackey Elementary School.

After reading to the class, one student asked Mayor Goodman if he could take one thing with him on a deserted island, what would it be. The Mayor replied that it would be a bottle of gin. And when a student later asked Mayor Goodman what one of his hobbies was, the Mayor said "drinking."

Asked about it later, Goodman told the Las Vegas Sun: "I'm the George Washington of mayors. I can't tell a lie." (Link via Rob McMillin).

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  1. How did this story even make the news? I thought “what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.”

  2. Gin over rum? Philistine.

  3. If you could only take one thing, wouldn’t it be something that didn’t require a mixer?

  4. Joe-
    Mixers are for wimps. Ths guy’s from VEGAS, baby!

    (Yes, I am a hypocrite for making that comment. The only non-mixer booze I like is the chocolate cream stuff.)

  5. The monkey butlers will whip up some mixers. Pinapple, guava, all kinds of stuff, at least if Gilligan’s Island is to be trusted.

  6. Mixers are for pussies joe. You aren’t welcome in Vegas.

  7. Gin? No fucking way. Gin is for wimpy British ponces. No, I’d bring vodka.

  8. Don’t fuck with the mayor. He is connected.

  9. Hizzoner chose one bottle?!? Why not a case of gin, or even better, a distillery?

    Geez, instant gratification — that’s Vegas for you.

    “I’m the George Washington of mayors. I can’t tell a lie.” Apparently from his drinking habits, he’s also the George W. Bush of mayors. Hey-yo! I’m here all week!

  10. The monkey butlers will whip up some mixers.

    Everyone needs a monkey butler. There should be a mandate.

    Eric II and GG,

    Watch out, there. I don’t know too many wimpy gin drinkers (myself excluded…please don’t hurt me….)

    As for the mayor’s decision, I don’t know how wise bringing a bottle of gin on a deserted island would be…I mean, come on? One bottle? He obviously doesn’t like drinking that much…. why not just bring a case of gin bottles instead? It’ll last longer….

  11. SPD,

    just read your comment now, after I posted at 1:24…. great minds think alike…

  12. smacky,

    A monkey butler in every home! πŸ™‚

  13. Seriously joe,
    Although I myself find drinking gin to be the equivalent to drinking perfume, true gin connoisseurs consider mixers heresy. Something to do with the subtleties of juniper. Even casual gin aficionados mix it with vermouth or soda water. Not exactly flavor overpowering sugar water. In fact, gin is all about the flavor. Each brand of gin has it’s own distinct flavor. Without flavoring, gin would be vodka.

    Once again you astonish me with the breadth of your ignorance.

  14. I’d need about 2,000 cases of vodka baby.

    And a hot guy and chick so I could alternate. πŸ™‚

  15. Warren,

    Vodka has flavor. It has great flavor. πŸ™‚

  16. What’s his sex life like? Is he the Bill Clinton of Mayors too? πŸ™‚

  17. A monkey butler in every home! πŸ™‚

    …and a plate of bananas in every kitchen!

    And a hot guy and chick so I could alternate. πŸ™‚

    … are you bi, Gary Glitter? Just curious….pun intended….

  18. smacky,

    That may be the first time in recorded history that anyone has ever referred to my mind as “great.” But thanks for the compliment!

    If anyone asked me what I’d bring, I’d have to say a lifetime supply of SPF 40 sunscreen — I’m Irish, you see. Like camels, the lifetime of gin we Irish consume is stored in a special hump for later use if required. (No mixers, either… they’d just interfere with the booze.)

  19. With you guys it’s either pinko Russian vodka or aristocratic Limey gin. Any good, honest, patriotic American knows, if you’re stuck with one bottle, make the right choice: Bourbon.

  20. Bourbon? That beverage sounds a little too “continental” for me, Frenchy!

  21. Well, if I can’t have the Samuel Smith’s brewery moved onto the island, I guess I’ll opt for scotch. Sweet delicious scotch.

  22. Or a handful of MaJic seeds, the gift that keeps on giving.

  23. smacky,

    I was before I got married. πŸ™‚ I guess I would be again if my wife were to – heaven forbid – die before me.

    SPD,

    If I were going to bring French liquor it would be Cognac and Annisette.

  24. Stranded alone on a desert island? Arsenic. πŸ˜‰

  25. Ah, screw it… bartender, Mad Dog 40/40, and keeps it comin’!

  26. Personally, if I could only take one thing to a desert island, I’d have to say that a speedboat with a really big gas tank would come in handy.

  27. This thread is sort of turning into a quasi-virtual-reality of what it would be like to really order drinks with some of you freaks at an actual bar. Very intriguing. I guess that’s what I’ll have to settle for, since Reason would never descend from it’s Lofty Throne to visit my crappy home town….

  28. P.S. I say “freaks” with the utmost affection.

  29. In fact, gin is all about the flavor.

    Yeah – piss flavor. It’s all about that.

    And since I know everybody is wondering…I second the bourbon whiskey vote.

  30. smacky calls me a freak, cool_girl calls me a dork… Christ, it’s like high school all over again!

  31. SPD,

    You’re a dweeb. πŸ™‚

    Any chance that the mayor is a serial killer? πŸ™‚

  32. Gin? Vodka? Bourbon? Bah!

    TEQUILA! And lots of it! Where’s my bottle of Don Julio?

  33. gin makes a man mean…everybody booze up and riot!

  34. Give me Everclear: for the serious drinker who knows EXACTLY where he ‘s going and wants to get there fast.

  35. what it would be like to really order drinks with some of you freaks at an actual bar

    What an unregulated sausage party that would be.

  36. If he’s such an avid gin drinker, what’s he doing with Bombay Saphire? That’s the baby-step on the way up from vodka, scorned by hardcore gin enthusiasts.

    SPD: Bourbon is named for a county in Kentucky. Nothing French about it, at least not directly. (In fact, I don’t believe there’s any whiskey still produced in Bourbon County itself.)

  37. Warren, interesting thing about gin and perfume–I usually think men’s cologne smells like gin. Can’t stand cologne, so gin is definitely not my drink.

    I’ll stand with the scotch drinkers, preferably at Gary’s bar, since there’s something for everyone there!

  38. That is correct, John. I just wanted to draw a parallel between the name and the former ruling dynasty of France, which I’m sure lent their house’s name to the Kentucky county in question.

    Nothing sticks in a patriot’s craw these days than being associated with anything remotely French.!

  39. Hm…I never really thought about the whole gin/perfume/cologne thing….since you’ve brought my attention to it, though, kinda makes me not want to be a gin drinker anymore…that, and those ugly gin blossoms that I should be expecting any year now….

    …maybe I’ll go see if there’s anything interesting being concocted by the Chocolate Creme liquor folks….or by the vodka pansies….

  40. Also, the county of Bourbon? Paris! I merde you not.

  41. “county seat,” I meant.

  42. Vodka has flavor.

    Yeah, it tastes like burning. (As long as we’re quoting the “monkey butlers” episode. Sorry, Pavel.)

  43. Gary Gunnels,

    Although hizzonner probably isn’t a serial killer, it wouldn’t surprise me to find out he defended a few in his private practice.

    “…I can’t tell a lie…”

    Any more? Naahhh, he was just a defense attorney. πŸ™‚

  44. You’re all a bunch of worthless drunks. Give me a large supply of MDMA any day.

  45. Karl,
    Don’t know much about it myself, but I thought most folks mixed MDMA and alcohol. Not so?

    free form,
    Mine’s Dewar’s. What’s yours?

  46. Warren, right on! Dewar’s! Mmmmmm.

  47. Warren,
    Mixing MDMA and alcohol is a supremely bad idea. The dehydrating properties of alcohol don’t mix well with the overheating properties of MDMA. And strengely enought, even though there’s risks of hyponatremia if you drink oo much water under MDMA, the diuretic properties of alcohol don’t help much.

    Or so I’ve heard…

  48. Give a man a bottle of gin, and he’ll drink for a day. Teach him how to distill, and he’ll drink forever!

  49. Tequila – Sauza Hornitos Reposado

    Am I the only one wondering if Evan Williams drinks Evan Williams Bourbon?

  50. Give a man a bottle of gin, and he’ll drink for a day. Teach him how to distill, and he’ll drink forever!

    Hey, I resemble that remark! I come from a long line of moonshiners and bootleggers.

  51. SPD at 3:15
    Nothing sticks in a patriot’s craw these days [more] than being associated with anything remotely French.!

    Main Entry: pa?tri?ot
    Pronunciation: ‘pA-trE-&t, -“? chiefly British ‘pa-trE-&t
    Function: noun
    Etymology: Middle French

  52. Maurkov, you’re a smart-ass. (that’s a compliment)

  53. I’d opt for a magical refillable Scotch bottle, and since it’s my island I might as well move up from my old pal Scoresby to some fancypants single malt like Laphroaig or something.

    Warren is right about gin though. The taste may be life-alteringly horrible, but it really does have a taste, unlike vodka. I once attended a gyppo gin tasting seminar because they provided free food, and they really drilled in that stuff about the juniper. The seminar was by Tanqueray, so the real takeaway was that if you’re not drinking Tanqueray you might as well be drinking mucus. Tanqueray’s out of my price range, but for clear liquors, give me gin every time.

  54. I come from a long line of moonshiners and bootleggers.

    Sol, are you a Kennedy?

    This is what might happen if you drink too much gin.

  55. This is what might happen if you drink too much gin.

    …. you fall off the side of a steep staircase?

    …. you develop open sores on your legs?

    …. you become a demonic cannibal? (see left foreground of picture)

  56. The taste may be life-alteringly horrible, but it really does have a taste, unlike vodka.

    You strike me as the kind of man who would ponder deeply the choice between regular and cherry flavored Robitussin.

    Vodka is supposed to be “tasteless.” It’s a derivative of the Russo-Polish word for water. That should tell you something about the drinking culture over there.

    I’ve personally never heard of an Irishman so bigoted and dandyish about his alcohol. There’s generally only one explanation for such things and that is why you are now on my list of suspected lightweights.

  57. Two words:
    Neverending Jagerator!

  58. I’ve personally never heard of an Irishman so bigoted and dandyish about his alcohol. There’s generally only one explanation for such things and that is why you are now on my list of suspected lightweights.

    Why do vodkaphiles always claim some kind of toughguy advantage from their choice of booze? Vodka is the secret ingredient in every girly drink in the Ms. Boston book-and it’s a girly favorite because of that famous intentional flavorlessness. Not that there’s anything wrong with that! But I’m not going to get into a manliness competition with a guy who’s sipping a Sex On The Beach.

  59. Johnny Walker Red or Talisker. Yum.

  60. Smacky, it makes you drop your baby, take snuff, develop syphilis, fight dogs for bones, pawn your tools, brawl, starve, and/or die.

    On Beer Street (big), OTOH, everyone is content, peaceable, and prosperous, reading, chatting, and painting.

  61. “I’d need about 2,000 cases of vodka baby.

    “And a hot guy and chick so I could alternate. :)”
    –Gary Gunnels

    gaius marius is right: we really are living in the last days of Rome!

  62. “…But I’m not going to get into a manliness competition with a guy who’s sipping a Sex On The Beach.”

    Hook me up to a lie detector, I’ll say that I’ve had Sex on the Beach with three girls at the same time; I’ll say that they all loved it, that they all wanted more, and I’ll pass that lie detector test with flying colors.

    …now that’s manly.

    Actually, I’ve always been partial to whisky myself. There’s this place in Vegas–it’s a reconstructed Irish Pub. So what? Who wants to go to a Vegas version of an Irish Pub?

    …They have have dozens of single malts. I hate Vegas, but I don’t mind that place so much.

    http://www.vegashotspots.com/hot_spots/bars__lounges/best_irish_pub/

  63. Gary Gunnels, that serial killer crack was just the ticket to lighten up my evening after a long and tedious day that started with a trip to the dentist and ended with nobody getting a tax refund. Thanks for the laugh. LOL. LOL. Gotta say, the glass of wine is going to run a close second though.

  64. Jennifer’s comment ran a close second though.

  65. After a nice day of dental work, isn’t the vino gonna hurt like hell?

  66. Vodka Pundit had a hilarious post on this on Wednesday. Worth looking.

    http://vodkapundit.com/archives/007565.php

  67. Ken, nah, the vino works like a nice shot of Listerine except:

    a. It tastes better

    b. It numbs better

    πŸ™‚

    “I hate Vegas, but I don’t mind that place so much.”…..that’s working too. πŸ™‚

  68. Gin, vodka, whisky? Who cares? They will all equally increase your likelihood of scoring with a fat chick and admitting your secret fondness for women’s golf. And it all tastes the same when it comes back up.

    Now, beer, that’s a real man’s drink…

  69. Hops and barley are likely to be too difficult to grow on a desert island, so wishing for a homebrewing set-up is probably out. I imagine one could distill poitin from taro, though.

    As for vodka meaning “water”, both whiskey (uisce beatha) and aquavit (aqua vitae) translate as “the water of life”.

    Sl?inte Mhath!

    Kevin

  70. pococurante,

    No Kennedy – just Southern white trash. But the good citizens of Beer Street seem dangerously overweight to me. Does John Banzhaf know about that?

    Sl?inte mh?r!

  71. Maurkov,

    You made my morning. Shit, I may only need four cups of joe to get me going this AM. πŸ™‚

    Kevin Carson,

    Damn straight baby! Another round for the house!!! πŸ™‚

  72. LIMEY gin?!?! The Zeeland sea-beggars are the ones what gave the Brits a taste for genever. Properly made, gin is a Dutch drink, and I’ve unfortunately haven’t been able to find the real deal in the US for years. Tanqueray “Malacca” was close in style, as fits the site of the Dutch East Indies Stadthouse, but even that’s fallen off the shelves in my area.

    My first true shot of hard liquor was Bols Genever (from the stoneware bottle!) with my Dutch grandfather one Xmastime in my teens. Firewater with juniper up front and a malty sweetness afterwards – a lot going on, not a dry gin by any means.

    Proost!

  73. Who ever mentioned gin making you mean and nasty was on to something. My brother used to be a gin drinker, but he kept finding his way into fights and also had the strange habit of “nudeing up” and making his way into strange girls beds. He has now switched to beer and wine.

  74. Everyone needs a monkey butler.

    On my desert island, I would prefer to have a Yancy * Butler.

    My Butler’s duties will include, but not be limited to, preparing and/or bearing unto me the following beverages:

    -Martinis (sometimes gin, sometimes vodka, sometimes dirty, sometimes not, but always with a couple olives)

    – Scotch on the rocks (So far I’ve found that any Scotch with a name beginning with “Glen-” will do)

    – Jameson’s whiskey (or, if money is no object, the occasional Middleton’s)

    – Bloody Marys.

    – Black and tans (Guinness and Bass Ale).

    – The occasional margarita.

    I’m not an expert drinker, but I like variety.

  75. Folks, remember, this man has an advertising contract with Bombay Sapphire Gin so he’s GOING to say “gin”. And I live just outside of Las Vegas, so I know if he’s asked a question, damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead, he’ll answer it. Funny thing is that when he was interviewed about this on the local cable TV channel, he abruptly stopped the interview and walked out. The cable channel quickly cut to their normal programming, scrolling municipal annoucements with background music. The music that was playing just happened to be Louis Armstrong singing “What A Wonderful World”.

    “I hate Disneyland. It primes our kids for Las Vegas.” – Tom Waits

  76. FROZEN MARGARITAS, preferably on a beach.

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