Jimmy Carter Honored (USS Irony Edition)
Former peanut farmer and naval officer Jimmy Carter has had the "world's most advanced fast-attack submarine named in his honor."
Which leads Neil Steinberg in the "eyes, the ears, the honest voice of New York" (a.k.a. the Daily News) to note:
Name senior centers and, at the proper time, a stamp after him.
But an attack submarine, as the Navy did yesterday? After the man famous for two battles: a tragically botched rescue mission in the Iranian desert, and fending off a crazed bunny with an oar?
Editor's Note: As of February 29, 2024, commenting privileges on reason.com posts are limited to Reason Plus subscribers. Past commenters are grandfathered in for a temporary period. Subscribe here to preserve your ability to comment. Your Reason Plus subscription also gives you an ad-free version of reason.com, along with full access to the digital edition and archives of Reason magazine. We request that comments be civil and on-topic. We do not moderate or assume any responsibility for comments, which are owned by the readers who post them. Comments do not represent the views of reason.com or Reason Foundation. We reserve the right to delete any comment and ban commenters for any reason at any time. Comments may only be edited within 5 minutes of posting. Report abuses.
Please
to post comments
He was also the only president that was a submariner. Nothing ironic about that.
Eagle Claw was the first operational use of Delta Force (that we know of). They were a little more sucessful in 1983 in Grenada. Delta was the brainchild of some Rangers and others in the Army that sprung out of the experiences of the Army in Viet Nam. They are, to my knowledge, the only only special operations unit in the U.S. military that accepts women, though the women who are part of Delta Force are completely segregated from the normal "squadrons" that make up Delta.
Note also that Carter started our military involvement in Afghanistan. The Carter administration also okayed the use of American trained Korean Special Forces against South Korean democracy demonstrators.
Our next warship will be the USS Gandhi.
Jimmah made the mistake of actually serving in the military, which is for chumps (see also, John Kerry). Real patriots have more important things to do, like post on warblogs and keep track of the ever growing list of traitors.
Good point Brian. I am waiting for the USS Warblogger to be christened. We need to honor the real heroes.
Carter was an awful president. However, he was a Navy officer, he did serve on submarines, and, he was also an advocate (practically only) of nuclear power. Speaking as a former squid, I care very little about who's name is used on what hardware. While I have plenty of contempt for Jimmy the politician, I have no problem with naming a submarine for him.
" No, the nearest Navy vessel is the USS Walter Mondale....its a laundry
ship!"
Carter used to tell people he was a nuclear engineer, so why not?
I really only care about one issue, though:
Is it a "NOO-cleer" or "NOOK-cuh-ler" submarine?
The USS Jimmy Carter (SSN 23, Sea Wolf class) at any sight of danger it will go down faster than Monica on Clinton.
Due to gender integration there's no way the Navy will ever name a ship after Bill Clinton. The thing would sink, because the fate of the USS Bill Clinton is to have countless women go down on it.
Thank you, I'm here all week! Don't forget to tip your waitress!
Yeah, Mo, all this irony is killing me, too.
Due to gender integration there's no way the Navy will ever name a ship after Bill Clinton. The thing would sink, because the fate of the USS Bill Clinton is to have countless women go down on it.
Plus, everyone onboard would get the giggles everytime the order came to "blow the ballast."
Or "raise the periscope."
And the torpedo tubes would bend slightly to one side.
What's that stain on my dress blues?
"He was also the only president that was a submariner."
He had that dorky haircut and the little wings on his feet, but he also could go toe to toe with the Hulk.. I'll give him that.
They should paint a rabbit on the hull.
When did we start naming stuff after people who aren't dead?
QFMC cos. V
It wasn't a rabbit. It was a nutria.
"Good point Brian. I am waiting for the USS Warblogger to be christened. We need to honor the real heroes."
Sadly, Glenn Reynolds was tragically killed in the line of duty when he took one too many digital pictures of his own ass.
Well, that was no ordinary rabbit. That was the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on!
When did we start naming stuff after people who aren't dead?
I believe it started with USS Ronald Reagan
I think a lot of precedents were broken because of RR.
It's as much fun to rag on Jimmy as any other prez but he was responsible for much of the deregulation that RR got the credit (airlines, trucking) or blame (savings and loan) for.
He was, in my opinion, one of the most intelligent and most morally decent man to occupy the White House. Neither was enough to overcome the problems he faced in office.
Fair Winds and Following Seas President Jimmy Carter and USS Jimmy Carter
And right now, down the street from me, we're building the USS George HW Bush.
"Our next warship will be the USS Gandhi."
Jennifer,
Gandhi wasn't Amurrikan.
How about USS Percy Dovetonsils?
And did you hear the Jimmy submarine will be armed with Nerf rockets?
Mabye they should have name the sub after his daughter Amy.
I seem to recall one of his presidential speeches wherein he said he was going to consult with her on some national defense matter.
Not one of Jimmy's better moments.
Citizen Bartram,
Thanks. I was thinking it might be Reagan, what with the office building, airport and who knows what else. I'd like to think he would have been against it but it seems Nancy wasn't and the former governer of Georgia should know better as well.
Now, Brendan Byrne naming the Brendan Byrne Arena after himself while he was still in office - genius!
QFMC cos. V
The fucking Navy!
Ruthless,
American ships can be named after "foreigners" and foreign places; that's why you have had ships named Achilles and St. Augustine and St. Francis and Santiago de Cuba.
There used to be a naming convention for ships.
Aircraft carriers were named for great battles.
That didn't last long. They broke tradition (pretty short mind you) with FDR (1947).
Using presidents became (something of) a convention with JFK. Toss in Enterprize, Forrestal, Stennis and Nimitz and it goes to hell again.
Kwais,
Maybe if we renamed our ammunition we'd get more of it.
The Robert C. Byrd 120 [mm] HEAT Round
The Barbara Boxer 120 [mm] Sabot Round
Although, then I'd have to say "Gunner, Boxer, tank!" or "Gunner, Byrd, PC!" both of which sound funny.
Dragoon!
hey kwais
Without the Navy you guys wouldn't be goin' anywhere. 🙂
SF writer Ian Banks, and to a lesser extent his colleague Ken MacLeod, have come up with a number of unusual (space) warship names in their novels. In this spirit, and stealing almost all of the following from these writers' works, I would like to propose the following names for future US warships:
USS You'll Thank Me Later
USS Just Another Victim of the Ambient Morality
USS Don't Make Me Come Over There
USS I Blame Your Mother
USS What Are the Civilian Applications?
USS Necessary Evil But Still Cool
USS Frank and Constructive Exchange of Views
The "George W. Bush" won't be a ship.
It will be an unmanned aerial drone.
Whereas the USS Bill Clinton will be a garbage scow.
(Sigh.) I was going to explain that the post-Vietnam US military buildup actually started under Carter, but I don't think that anything can shake the stereotypes conservatives and conservatarians have of him as a quasi-pacifist. This stereotype comes partly from his religion and his post-presidential peace missions, and partly from the fact that as president he rejected some particular weapons systems (like the B-1 and the neutron bomb--which neglects that he supported others like the MX) but mainly from comparisons with the larger buildup under Reagan (just as the left's stereotype that Herbert Hoover "did nothing" about the Depression was based on comparisons with the New Deal. Nowadays, the "do-nothing Hoover" stereotype has largely been recognized as a fallacy, and has even been countered by an even more exaggerated conservative-libertarian stereotype of "Hoover the evil interventionist" but that's another story...) People sometimes forget that while Carter was in power he was attacked by the Teddy Kennedy wing of his party for spending *too much* on defense. Who today remembers that "At [Secretary of Defense] Brown's urging, NATO members pledged in 1977 to increase their individual defense spending three percent per year in real terms for the 1979-86 period."?
http://www.defenselink.mil/specials/secdef_histories/bios/brown.htm
Of course the rescue mission in Iran was a failure. Last I heard, so were certain things Reagan did in Lebanon...
About that killer rabbit...
Plunge: "It wasn't a rabbit. It was a nutria."
I find this plausible. A nutria is a muskrat-like, large aquatic rodent (but not the largest; that would be the capybara). Some say it is rather aggressive and territorial. Pictures:
http://racphoto.com/Parks/OR/Finley/Mammals/CRW_8804-ed.jpg
http://www.curtis.sieber.com/vacat99/images/nutria.jpg
However, this Web site claims to have obtained a photo of the actual event, snapped shortly after the encounter, from the Jimmy Carter Library. Story here:
http://www.narsil.org/politics/carter/killer_rabbit.html
Photo here:
http://www.narsil.org/politics/carter/killer_rabbit.html#photo
Click on the photo for an even larger view. Get the head of the person alleged to be Jimmy Carter in the center of your monitor, then sweep to the right to see the animal swimming away from the scene. It appears to be an actual rabbit, complete with large rabbity eyes and rabbity ears -- not the blunt, small-eared, beaver-like head of a nutria. However, I confess I am a little skeptical that this photo is the genuine article. With that caveat, I merely enter this as more alleged evidence in the court of opinion.
I think you're on to something, Deus. If they named ships/boats after comic book heroes, they would definitely up their nerd/techie recruitment.
"(snort) I'm on the USS Reed Richards (snort).. it kicks ass!"