Good Night, Proud Eagle


The Associated Press is reporting that Attorney General John Ashcroft is "likely to resign," due in part to exhaustion and stress.

Brian Doherty profiled the Show-Me A.G. back in June 2002.

NEXT: Taking it in the Gut

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  1. I’ve been reading this elsewhere, I swear, I hope they’re not all yankin’ my cord. I could use some good news.

  2. I guess Reason really socked it to ‘im!

    Good job!

  3. Hot damn!I hope AP got their shit right.
    I figure his conscience is eating his ass up and causing well deserved stress.

  4. Awesome. Then the second thought: They’ll probably dig up someone just as crazy but more smooth and competent.

    Start the Rummy death watch. Surely even Dubs can see that Rummy’s not the strategic genius he likes to think he is?

  5. If so, Brian, that would mean George Bush put the well being of thousands of soldiers in the hands of a man he knew wasn’t up for the job…

    Just so he wouldn’t be knocked off his pose during an electoral campaign.

  6. I’m not sure Bush knew ahead of time that he wasn’t up to it. He’s good at looking confident and seeming like he knows what he’s talking about.

    Of course when was clear he didn’t, yes, he was kept around just for appearances sake.

  7. on’t celebrate until you know who’s going to replace him.

  8. I for one welcome our new overlords

  9. Bill Bennett for AG.
    Jerry Falwell for Health and Human Services director.
    Paul Wolfowitz for Secretary of Denfense.

  10. Jacob Sullum For Drug Czar!

  11. Jacob is a drug czar, of sorts.

  12. Too…many… statuary boobies in DC… must flee…..

  13. Hm… given Bush’s mandate, maybe he can put a real constitutional scholar in charge of the DOJ. Alan Keyes!

    BTW Let The Eagle Soar wasn’t a bad song, melodically speaking. I’ll bet if U2 had recorded it, it would have been a hit.

  14. “Statues Gone Wild!”

  15. More like too busy watching porn and figuring out which is the “worst” amongst all those dirty sinners. Good riddance. Exhaustion and stress my ass. And yes, I’m sure whoever replaces him won’t exact be the new face of civil liberties, but still, good riddance. Here’s an article from the Austin Chronicle about porn in the President’s home state:

    Because, you know, Nympho Bride is causing the downfall of America.

  16. “Exhaustion and stress my ass.”

    Anyone else listen to Howard Stern this morning?

  17. Somebody’s gotta bring it up:

    Supreme Court Justice John Ashcroft.

  18. I think Janet Reno is available.

  19. I have also heard a few mentions of Guliani. THAT would be good, I think, remove one of the Dems rallying cries, and maybe stop the idiotic busting of comic book and adult video stores.

  20. The inside story is that Ashcroft and Bush have had many disagreements lately because Ashcroft is not conservative enough for Bush’s tastes.

  21. Ken,


  22. Joe – True, but it would make for some damned entertaining CPAN!

  23. Ken, good lord man, don’t say such things! How the hell am I supposed to sleep tonight, with that horrifying image in my mind? Let’s hope no one in the right wing conspiracy reads this.

  24. Giuliani would be a big improvement. Probably just as likely to infringe civil liberties as Ashcroft, but much more likely to also catch some actual terrorists in the process. So a net win.

    But I’ll be a contrarian for a minute — has anybody here read the Inside Baseball stuff in the Atlantic and New Republic that describe how Ashcroft is the voice of reason in the Administration, when it comes to “enemy combatants”? Ashcroft thinks they deserve due process, a trial of some sort, etc., while the DOD guys want to hold them indefinitely or use secret tribunals or some such crap. I’d say that’s a more important civil liberties issue than the Patriot Act. I don’t like the Patriot Act, but so far I haven’t seen it used to anything horrible.

  25. I’ll buy the booze if Ted Kennedy promises to get rowdy drunk for the filibuster!! God knows he and his junior senator aren’t going to be too busy writing legislation any time soon…

  26. The stress comes from knowing you are exceeding the constitutional powers of your office. And then lying about it. I suppose he was only following orders.

    “We had to destroy the constitution in order to save it.”

    Maybe we’ll get to see those hot statues again.

  27. Daniel Monteil wrote: “I have also heard a few mentions of Guliani. THAT would be good, I think, remove one of the Dems rallying cries, and maybe stop the idiotic busting of comic book and adult video stores.”

    Are you familiar with Giuliani’s crusade against adult video stores in New York City? Not content with using zoning regulations to turn about 90% of the city into a censorship zone, he encouraged citizens to videotape customers going into the remaining stores in the hopes they could embrarass the clientele and cause the businesses to be unprofitable.

  28. Daniel offered: I have also heard a few mentions of Guliani. THAT would be good, I think, remove one of the Dems rallying cries, and maybe stop the idiotic busting of comic book and adult video stores.

    SinC: Didn’t Guiliani run out all the comic book and adult video stores from Midtown Manhattan? Part of his vision that such businesses devalue the surrounding society?

    (the comic book store part is a bit of a tease)….I bet you intended to reference ‘head shops’ or other alternative lifestyle type retail outlets?

  29. I guess when Bush admitted that he had made mistakes in some of his appointments, John got the hint.

    He was incompetent as AG of Missouri, He was incompetent as a candidate (loosing to a dead man) and he is imcompetent as the US AG.

    However, given the cases he favored bringing to court it was a good thing he lost the big cases.
    Incompetence can be a positive thing.

  30. Rudy would probably get his nomination approved without much trouble but Bush probably wants someone more reliably conservative and lower profile.

  31. parse: Maybe Daniel meant that it would stop the busting of comic book and adult video stores in New York City…we can kick him out of the state and get him to stop influencing local politics by giving him bigger fish to fry.

    More seriously, I shudder at the thought of Ghouliani as US AG. His slant towards giant corporations and cleaning up the city’s image for the benefit of outsiders was unmistakeable.

  32. “I don’t like the Patriot Act, but so far I haven’t seen it used to anything horrible.”

    Maybe that’s because it’s against the law for anyone to tell you about it.

  33. Attorney General John Ashcroft is likely to resign, due in part to exhaustion and stress.

    Or could it be feelings of, oh I don’t know, maybe………..GUILT

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