Too Much Information (GOP Sex Habits Edition)

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Alternate Title: Please, God, Make It Stop.

ABC's Primetime Live has conducted a sex survey that would no doubt make Alfred Kinsey go celibate; the findings are the basis of an Oct. 21 broadcast. Among other things, the Prime Timers have broken down the results via political affiliation, which seem on the face of it to confirm Michel Foucault's ideas that repressive social mores are designed not to reduce sexual activity but to enhance it. To wit:

Who is very satisfied with their sex life?
Republicans–56 percent; Democrats–47 percent

Who has worn something sexy to enhance their sex life:
Republicans–72 percent; Democrats–62 percent

And the kicker, which suggests that ABC is really an arm of the GOP:

When asked whether they had ever faked an orgasm, more Democrats (33 percent) than Republicans (26 percent) said they had.

Though there is this helpful explanatory note:

Among the factors that impact the survey results is that more men identify themselves as Republicans and men are more likely to say they are sexually satisfied and enjoy sex "a great deal." Also, Democrats are more likely to be women; and the poll results show that women are more likely to fake orgasms.

Whole thing here.

[A tip o' the fake orgasm to JustOneMinute via Instapundit]

NEXT: "An important statement in favor of personal liberties"

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  1. [A tip o’ the fake orgasm …

    How does one tip an orgasm?
    How much should one timp an orgasm?

  2. Did they break down by party the number of people who have experienced problems with Santorum?

  3. Of course more women fake orgasms. In order for a man to fake an orgasm, a special-effects team would be necessary.

  4. that would be telling.

    though the number crunch on that would be a mess.

  5. As someone on (I think) Radley’s blog observed, different criteria for “satisfaction” may come into play as well. To wit, if you’re convinced that the uniquely acceptable form of sexual activity is a perfunctory annual procreative shag with the missus, missionary style, then you’re probably more apt to report that as “satisfactory” however much actual happiness you derive from it. Someone working under different parameters might not be unhappy as such, but not consider themselves “satisfied” in that they’d still like more (or more varied) sex.

  6. hardly, if condoms are involved.

  7. thoreau
    Pleeease,I just got that picture out of my mind and here you go again with that Santorum shit.

  8. THe explanatory note suggests that the poll was completely unscientific as did not control for sexual orientation. Just another example of unscientific research given a pass by media when simple scrutiny would reveal either that the poll was controlled for sexual orientation (and ABC’s explanatory note a smug CYA on behalf of viewers who are Democrats) or the poll was unscientific and groundless.

  9. This reminds me of P.J. O’Rourke’s explanation of why it doesn’t bother him when liberals call him a Nazi: “No one ever fantasizes about being tied to the bed and ravished by someone dressed as a liberal.”

  10. Shouldn’t it be “A tip o’ the Jimmy cap?”

    Isn’t Santorum shit redundant?

    Let’s say, hypothetically, that this study was scientific. How hard is it to normalize these numbers by gender? Do networks hire GED dropouts as their scienticians?

  11. Mo-

    What are “scienticians”?

    The study results kind of make sense. Watch Fox News and it becomes clear that the GOP has better looking female pundits. That has to translate into some happier sex lives.

  12. I am never satisfied with my sex life because no matter how much sex I get, it’s not enough.

    Serious comment – they don’t include ‘independents’ or 3rd parties in their survey, either, which totally makes it worthless.

  13. thoreau,

    The French have more sex than any other nationality on the planet apparently.

  14. The French have more sex than any other nationality on the planet apparently.

    I know. And I wish they’d keep the noise down. I’m trying to sleep!

  15. Do you know why women fake orgasms?

    Because they think men care.

  16. thoreau,

    Hannity is the new Santorum.

  17. thoreau,
    It’s a Simpsons reference from the episode where Lisa became a vegetarian. It’s what Troy McClure called the “scientists” in the meat council reel (do they still use those old projectors in elementary schools?). I meant it as a way to distinguish whatever you call the people that ABC used versus actual scientists, scuh as yourself.

  18. Who has worn something sexy to enhance their sex life:
    Republicans–72 percent; Democrats–62 percent

    This could simply mean that Democrats are more attractive than Repubs, and consequently they don’t need anything to ‘spice things up’. Just a thought from a former Republican Hawkish Libertarian(tm) whose wife is a liberal Democrat.

    Paul

    Oh, I know what y’all ‘re thinkin’. I was a hawkish Libertarian before I met my wife, so no conversion took place there. But I will say that she recanted her vegetarianism pretty fast after meeting me.

  19. Watch Fox News and it becomes clear that the GOP has better looking female pundits.

    Hmm, I dunno. I don’t watch fox news, so I can’t comment, but I seem to remember CNN had some pretty hot info-babes.

    Paul

  20. Ahem, yes. But the Red States, yes, they are so… enthusiastic for certain materials.

    One does believe this survey.

  21. So Republicans are more satisfied with their sex life? Was this survey taken before, or after, Arnold Schwarzenegger gave his speech at the GOP Convention?

  22. The missus and I have settled into a frenzy of doing the missionary once every prime year.
    Help me thoreau. Should I double up on the oysters now so I can stand tall in 2005?

  23. Ruthless, that’s too much information for me. But 2005 is not prime. It’s equal to 5*401. 2003 was prime, and the next prime year is 2011.

  24. Whew!
    What a load off!

    Time to gather me strength.

  25. Julian,

    So if they’re working on a different “satisfaction scale”, isn’t that like saying that conservatives are simply more satisfied because they have lower expectations?

    I can see that.

  26. My personal hypothesis is that people who, due to their scruples and inhibitions, aren’t out actually having sex very often or with very many people (some correlation with “conservative” here), have more time to think about it, fantasize about it, and mentally rehearse the things they’d do. This may result in a higher level of (mutual) satisfaction when they finally DO get to do it once in a while.

    (I will neither confirm nor deny that this hypothesis might be partly autobiographical.)

  27. Of course more women fake orgasms. In order for a man to fake an orgasm, a special-effects team would be necessary.

    Nah. Easiest thing in the world, really. And important, too.

    Women… women sense my power, and they seek the life essence. I do not avoid women, Mandrake, but I do deny them my essence.

  28. Who has worn something sexy to enhance their sex life: Republicans–72 percent; Democrats–62 percent

    This could simply mean that Democrats are more attractive than Repubs, and consequently they don’t need anything to ‘spice things up’.

    Me thinks there’s a disparity in the concept of “something sexy”. I wonder what would happen if you ran a comparison of the Victoria’s Secrets catalog list against voter rolls.

  29. Compare: frothing-at-the-mouth Ann Coulter vs. feminist icon Andrea Dworkin.

    There ain’t that much spice in the world for A.D.

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