Bush vs. the Anti-Bushes


Some point-counterpoint from "The Tank," a Deantastic gathering of around 200 anti-Bush partisans (including Joe Trippi and the blogger still known as Atrios) on 42nd St. who marked the president's speech by drinking cheap beer, scarfing pizza, and hurling profane, surreal and occasionally funny insults at a hapless television set, one that featured a dunce-cap taped right where Dubya's head ended, and signs reading "shame" and "what's your fuckin problem."

Here is a selected list of Bush statements and the hollered rebuttals that followed:

We learned of passengers on a doomed plane who died with a courage That you never had!

Since 2001, Americans have been given hills to climb
What? Where are these hills?

I am grateful to share my walk in life with Laura Bush.
She's a fucking robot!

[Ronald Reagan] will always define our party.
You're party's dead—just like Ronnie!

Because we acted, our economy is growing again, and creating jobs and nothing will hold us back.
Why don't you take credit for the fucking sun, you fucking prick!

The workers of our parents' generation typically had one job, one skill, one career—often with one company
We all work at Wal-Mart!

America must be the best place in the world to do business.
We don't know, we have no money!

we must protect small business owners and workers from the explosion of frivolous lawsuits
Explosion of shit! Suck my Cheney, Bush!

The American people deserve—and our economic future demands —- a simpler, fairer, pro-growth system.
Yeah, so you can understand it, idiot! Can we put it on a flash-card?

We must strengthen Social Security by allowing younger workers to save some of their taxes in a personal account—a nest egg
We're gonna build a nest egg on your head!

We are insisting on accountability
Starting with you, George!

this year 90 percent of its students passed state tests in reading and math.
More than you!

No dejaremos, etc.
Callete! No mas!

Anyone who wants more details on my agenda can find them online.
Fucking socialist!

we must make a place for the unborn child.
More children mean more unborn soldiers! Huzzah!

Because the union of a man and woman deserves an honored place in our society
That is the ugliest shirt I have ever seen in my life.

That guy's a shitty actor—I hate him!

Saddam Hussein's record of aggression and support for terror.
What about your record of terror, you murderer!

We knew his long history of pursuing, even using, weapons of mass destruction. And we know that Sept. 11th requires our country to think differently
Iraq didn't do it!

democracy is coming to the broader Middle East.
Sieg heil! You killed one thousand citizens! Where are the weapons?

and President Kwasniewski
Oh my God, he pronounced Kwasniewski! He was up all night, rehearsing Kwasniewski, I swear to God.

People sometimes have to correct my English—I knew I had a problem when Arnold Schwarzenegger started doing it.
Yeah, hasta la vista, fuck-hole!