Golden Voldy


In a sure sign that the Harry Potter franchise is now the world's leading full employment program for British hams, Ralph Fiennes has been named to play He Who Must Not Be Named. Equally important, I think, is that this completes Fiennes' dethroning of Jeremy Irons as the world's top Handsome English Actor Who's Just Slightly Too Creepy For Regular Leading Man Work. (It's a real position! And coveted!) Ten years ago Irons would have won the role of Voldemort walking away, and I'll miss the slithery, homoerotic innuendo he would have brought to the part. Then again, Fiennes has all those underemployed siblings to support. Somewhere in purgatory, James Mason and Claude Rains are smiling (icily) on their heirs.

Update: Reader Alan Vanneman informs me that he originated the gag about the British hams full employment program in this review of The Lord of the Rings.

NEXT: Parentis Goes Loco

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  1. Aside from the overall appeal of the stories themselves, I think the biggest attraction of the films is the inspired casting of the supporting roles.

  2. I thought this was a website for grown-ups.

  3. What about Edward Fox ?

  4. SM, if you want to see a wonderful, though small, recent Fox part, check out the Douglas McGrath adaptation of Nicholas Nickleby. Fox plays a boorish bazillionaire with whom evil Uncle Ralph hopes to set up his virginal niece, and he’s so delightfully diabolical I found myself rooting for him to score. Fox is one of those greats who’s had about a tenth of the career he deserved.

  5. Jeremy Irons probably did himself in when he took the part in that Dungeons and Dragons live-action movie a few years back.

  6. Much as homophobia is usually a sign of someone who is deep in the closet, erf’s objection strikes me as evidence of someone who fears their own immaturity.
    I’m 32 myself, headed to law school and a self-appointed Harry Potter expert (see URL link). I can attest without reservation that the Potter series is quite suitable for adults as well as children. In fact, I’d say it’s more advanced than much of what I read in adult publications…not that that’s much of an achievement.
    As for Voldemorte, I’m surprised they are using an actor for such a inhuman role. I was expected a computer generation like Golum but Fiennes should fill the role well.

  7. Eryk Boston said:

    In fact, I’d say it’s more advanced than much of what I read in adult publications…

    Penthouse? Playboy?

    For the record, I only read those for the pictures.

  8. Actually, most mainstream publications are written on a 6th grade level to allow for a wide readership. As for Neb’s publications of choice…they are far too tame for me.

  9. Couldn’t we bring back Terry Thomas for something?

  10. Eryk Boston said, “…a self-appointed Harry Potter expert…” and, “…As for Voldemorte…”

    Dude, the bad dude’s name is Voldemort (no silent “e”). Remember Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets (CoS) and the anagram of “Tom Marvolo Riddle” to “I am Lord Voldemort.”

    Yes, I am a nitpicker. Sorry.

  11. I never thought Jeremy Irons was creepy…

  12. …oops

  13. Well, seing as how I’m almost 40, I think I qualify. I know I’m qualified to comment about the books, after reading them with my daughter, as well as the films, after seeing them with same. So what’s your point, erf?

  14. Wellfellow –

    You want to expereince Jeremy Irons at his creepiest? See “Dead Ringers” (1988). If that doesn’t creep you out, nothing will…

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